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Fantasy Island (2020) reviews from people you don't follow

LeftSideCut (3776 KP) rated
Mar 22, 2021
Is Fantasy Island a good movie? I'd be inclined to say no. Is it as bad as everyone has been saying? Kind of...
The absolutely biggest flaw with this movie is it's pacing. The last 20 or so minutes are entertaining enough, and show off a few half decent twists, no matter how silly it gets, but sweet lord it really takes its time getting there. It's not a good slow burn either. The series of events leading up to the films climax is messy and bloated, and feels like a whole load of hot air being blown about.
The cast are ok...they do the best they can with an on the nose script that sounds like it's been written by adults trying to be "down with the kids" but the only person who comes out of this looking good (?) is Maggie Q. Her character was relatively interesting, everyone else was just an arsehole, and Michael Rooker is criminally under utilised. Michael Peña just looks severely uninterested for the whole runtime.
As I said, I didn't find it as ball achingly awful as I'd heard. It's a decent enough premise that unfortunately faffs about in its execution. It's sometimes entertaining, but devoid of any scares. And between this and the 2019 Black Christmas, I'm completely over Blumhouse movies replacing blood with jet black gooey liquid. Have some balls dammit!
The absolutely biggest flaw with this movie is it's pacing. The last 20 or so minutes are entertaining enough, and show off a few half decent twists, no matter how silly it gets, but sweet lord it really takes its time getting there. It's not a good slow burn either. The series of events leading up to the films climax is messy and bloated, and feels like a whole load of hot air being blown about.
The cast are ok...they do the best they can with an on the nose script that sounds like it's been written by adults trying to be "down with the kids" but the only person who comes out of this looking good (?) is Maggie Q. Her character was relatively interesting, everyone else was just an arsehole, and Michael Rooker is criminally under utilised. Michael Peña just looks severely uninterested for the whole runtime.
As I said, I didn't find it as ball achingly awful as I'd heard. It's a decent enough premise that unfortunately faffs about in its execution. It's sometimes entertaining, but devoid of any scares. And between this and the 2019 Black Christmas, I'm completely over Blumhouse movies replacing blood with jet black gooey liquid. Have some balls dammit!
Average Island
Well I don't really know anything about the old TV series apart from the actors. There are a few little nods to it but this is very different. The location looks nice and the start of the various fantasies coming to life is fun to see. Once things turn more sinister though the film becomes quite slow and rather dull than amazing. A few twists as to what is really going on with the island, but by then you really won't care about the characters that much. A shame as there was a lot of potential here to be creative but it ends in typical, predictable fashion. I had low expectations and they were met.
Much like the recent adaptation of the Banana Splits Hour, Blumhouse's Fantasy Island took a show from my childhood and added horror elements to the premise. Five strangers land on an island where their fantasy is granted. The island is overseen by a mysterious Latino named Mr. Roarke, played by master monologuist Michael Pena. As you may have seen in the trailer, two are given everything that they want (money, sex, a mansion), one plays soldier, one is given a fresh start, and one gets revenge on a middle-school bully. However, a fantasy can easily become a nightmare and the island does not distinguish. As the five strangers are slowly brought back together, they learn that the island did not randomly select them. Someone else has their own nightmarish fantasy to live. I will not spoil the secret, but the mysterious person behind it all makes precious little sense unless he or she had a traumatic brain injury before and during the plot of the movie. Some scenes were very good and it could have been a good horror movie if it had just left the storylines separate like the tv show managed to do.
