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Meddling Kids: A Novel
Meddling Kids: A Novel
Edgar Cantero | 2017 | Science Fiction/Fantasy
9
8.1 (15 Ratings)
Book Rating
Ever wonder what happened to the Scooby Doo gang when they grew up? It wasn't exactly a question I ever thought I needed an answer to until Edgar Cantero decided he needed to give his unique twist on what that adulthood could have looked like. In his beautifully bizarre (bizarrely beautiful?) novel, Cantero introduces us to the Blyton Summer Detective Club, a group of 4 teenagers and their dog who spend their summer vacations solving mysteries in idyllic Blyton Hills. We're familiar with the team: there's Peter, the jock; Nate, the nerdy outsider; Andy, the tomboy; Kerri, the smart one; and Sean, the faithful Weimaraner. After their final case in the summer of 77, involving a masked fortune hunter trying to find the buried treasure of Deboën Mansion, the kids suddenly hang up their spy gear and retire from mystery solving.

Jump ahead thirteen years, and those same crime solving sleuths of young are now disillusioned 20-somethings trying to make their way thru life, not really understanding where their lives went wrong. Peter is dead (even tho Nate still talks to him), Nate is institutionalized (he talks to a dead guy, after all), Andy is a wanderer with a somewhat criminal past, and Kerri is a bartender in a seedy bar, who is also taking care of Tim, Sean's descendant. There was something about that last case, the one they all can't stop thinking about, that wasn't quite right, that is at the root of their problems. When Andy finally decides that enough is enough and they need to go back to Blyton Hills to face these demons and reopen that last case, the group gets together one last time to try to bring sense and closure to that final, haunting case.

Of course, it's not as easy as just a guy in a mask, and as they face down eco-villainous corporations, primordial monsters, ecological disasters, and something that defies description, they begin to come to terms with what has been haunting them over the years. This sounds wildly simplistic as I type it out, and I'm leaving it that way. It's not simplistic in the slightest, but the joy in this book is in the details and following along with the BSDC as they uncover one clue after the next, taking them on a whirlwind ride that makes you unable to put the book down until the very last page.

Much like his previous novel The Supernatural Enhancements (which I am a huge fan of as well), Cantero takes his time with the story, creating a slow build that eventually spirals into this wild adventure, making unexpected twists and turns in the narrative so you never really are sure that you know what's going on. His characters are exactly who they appear to be, rifs of the Scooby gang, but he doesn't make clichés of them. These characters are all their own and as individual as can be. Eagle-eyed readers will also notice fun callbacks to the Scooby cartoons.

So, if you're looking for something with a little mystery, a little horror, with some supernatural hijinx thrown in for fun, you can't go wrong with Meddling Kids. And if you like this, be sure to check out Cantero's The Supernatural Enhancements as well.
  
Unfriended: Dark Web (2018)
Unfriended: Dark Web (2018)
2018 | Horror
It seems no matter where you look these days, there’s some reference to the “Dark Web”. These references range from credit card or Social Security numbers being traded to all sorts of heinous acts that would not only be frowned upon but outright illegal in most countries. The Dark Web and all the nefarious secrets it holds sets the stage for the stand-alone sequel to Blumhouse Productions original film Unfriended.

Unfriended: Dark Web stars Colin Woodell as Matias, a man in his early twenties who is hard at work on an App that he hopes will allow him to better communicate with his deaf girlfriend Amaya (Stephanie Nogueras). His dedication to the app and his insistence on utilizing technology versus simply learning sign language has driven a wedge in their relationship and that lack of ability to communicate plays an important role in the film.

On what seems to be a typical game night of Cards Against Humanity (played on Skype because it’s too difficult for the gang to meet in person), Matias reveals that he has purchased a “new” laptop off Craigslist. While it is clearer and much faster than his previous computer, it regularly hangs and crashes while they are trying to play the game. While investigating the cause of the hang-ups, Matias uncovers a treasure trove of films that are hidden on the laptop. His curiosity gets the best of him and he begins to watch the films only to realize that he has fallen into a den of horror where people pay a lot of money to kill people off in very specific ways. Unfortunately, not only is he sharing what he has discovered with all his friends, but there are also other participants watching his every move.

Unfriended: Dark Web uses much of the same camera tricks that the original used. The entire movie is shot from the perspective of the audience watching the events unfold on the screen as if each were on their own laptop. The action takes place over Facebook Messenger, Skype, and Google and the fact that most people are familiar with these tools helps the audience feel like they are part of the events even more. By the end of the movie it is clear that you are as much of a participant in the horror that unfolds as the individuals participating via the Dark Web. I enjoyed the use of the various technologies to draw the viewer in as much as I did in the original Unfriended. It’s a very interesting and unique way to tell a story.

Unfriended: Dark Web certainly kept my interest throughout the film. I felt it took a little while to find it’s footing, but like a roller coaster with an extremely high climb, once you get over the hump it’s an exhilarating and fulfilling ride. While the technology used may be a bit exaggerated, it is realistic enough to give you that uneasy feeling that this could really happen. While it would take the uttermost bad luck for the events to happen in the perfect way as they do in the film, I enjoyed watching it all unfold. Even though I am still more afraid of my credit card information being sold on the Dark Web than the events of Unfriended happening, I would recommend this film to anyone who’s a fan of the genre.

What I liked: Interesting premise, Unique perspective

What I liked less: Characters were a bit too stereotypical, Really no connection to the first film other than the name
  
Battlefield Earth (2000)
Battlefield Earth (2000)
2000 | Action, Horror, Sci-Fi
Ight Imma Head Out
When an alien species takes over Earth, the humans finally decide to rise up and fight back. Watching Battlefield Earth is like taking a shit that just doesn’t want to come out. It’s frustrating, it’s messy, and it only serves to screw up your day. In fact, this movie is so painful that I am forcing myself to watch it until I finish this review. Man, you should see how fast I’m typing right now.

Acting: 3
Less than two minutes in, the movie has one of those bloodcurdling “NO!” screams after main character Jonnie Goodboy Tyler (Barry Pepper) finds out someone close to him has died. That’s when I remember saying to myself: “What the hell did I just get myself into? I gotta sit through the rest of this?” You would think, “Well, it’s only uphill from here.” You, madam or sir, would be wrong. From John Travolta and Forest Whitaker’s painful performances as aliens to the rest of this horrid cast, I can’t really decide who did the worst job. I gave them a 3 because, well, I’m assuming they showed up on set everyday.

Beginning: 0

Cinematography/Visuals: 3
Fast forward to four minutes after the “scream”. You see a bunch of cavemen (ish) beating up a prop from a broken down minigolf fun center. You see this happening with weird cut shots and slow motion, all while focusing on the anger and intent of the cavemen who see it as a threat. It is quite possibly one of the dumbest scenes I have seen in film. It angers me even now just thinking about it.

Conflict: 6

Entertainment Value: 0

Memorability: 0
The only thing I need to remember is this movie is garbage and to run if someone ever mentions watching it. There is nothing about this movie I will ever treasure.

Pace: 2
Let me watch paint dry and see if I’m not more entertained. My wife captured a caterpillar in a jar recently because she thinks it may become a butterfly. I’m pretty sure it’s dying because it only moves an inch every few hours. That inch outpaces the speed at which this movie drags along. Give me the DMV. Give me the longest wait at any Disneyworld ride. Give me the lines for the 2008 voting stations. I will take any of these things over Battlefield Earth.

Plot: 0

Resolution: 1
Ended just like it began: As a failed movie with no redeeming qualities whatsoever.

Overall: 17
I usually don’t judge people on tastes. We’re all different and we all like different things. But if you enjoyed this movie in any shape or fashion and you profess to be my friend, please lose my number. The passion with which I hate this movie has no end.
  
    Hidden City®

    Hidden City®

    Games and Entertainment

    9.0 (1 Ratings) Rate It

    App

    #1 Most Popular Hidden Object Game In the World! Get ready for a journey unlike any other! Mirages...

Wild Rose (2018)
Wild Rose (2018)
2018 | Drama, Music
Three Chords and the Truth.
BAFTA named Jessie Buckley as one of their “Rising Stars” for 2019, and here she proves why.

Buckley plays Glaswegian Rose-Lynn Harlan, a decidedly wild child electronically tagged and released from the clink but straight down to some very public cowgirl sex with her erstwhile boyfriend. Only then does she have the afterthought of going round to the house of her Mum (Julie Walters) where two young children live. For Rose-Lynn is a single mum of two (#needs-to-be-more-careful-with-the-cowgirl-stuff), and the emotional damage metered out to the youngsters from her wayward life is fully evident.

Rose-Lynn is a frustrated ‘country-and-weste’… no, sorry… just ‘western’ singer, and she has a talent for bringing the house down in Glasgow during a show. The desire to ‘make it big’ in Nashville is bordering on obsession, and nothing – not her mum, not her children, nothing – will get in her way.

Rose-Lynn has no idea how to make her dream come true. (And no, she doesn’t bump into Bradley Cooper at this point). But things look up when she lies her way to a cleaning job for the middle class Susannah (Sophie Okonedo) who sees the talent in her and comes up with a couple of innovative ways to move her in the right direction.

Will she get out of her Glasgow poverty trap and rise to fame and fortune as a Nashville star?

Difficult to like.
Rose-Lynn is not an easy character to like. She is borderline sociopathic and has a self-centred selfish streak a mile wide. As she tramples all over her offspring’s young lives, breaking each and every promise like clockwork, then you just want to shout at her and give her a good shaking. It’s a difficult line for the film to walk (did the ghost of Johnny Cash make me write that?) and it only barely walks it unscathed.

Memories of Birdman.
A key shout-out needs to go to director Tom Harper (“Woman in Black 2“, and the TV epic “War and Peace”) and his cinematographer of choice George Steel. Some of the angles and framed shots are exquisitely done. A fantastic dance sequence through Susannah’s house (the best since Hugh Grant‘s No. 10 “Jump” in “Love Actually”) reveals the associated imaginary musicians in various alcoves reminiscent of the drummer in “Birdman“. And there are a couple of great drone shots: one (no spoilers) showing Rose-Lynn leaving a party is particularly effective.

The turns.
The camera simply loves Jessie Buckley. She delivers real energy in the good times and real pathos in the bad. She can – assuming it’s her performing – also sing! (No surprise since she was, you might remember, runner up to Jodie Prenger in the BBC search for a “Maria” for Lloyd Webber’s “Sound of Music”). She is certainly one to watch on the acting stage.

Supporting Buckley in prime roles are national treasure Julie Walters, effecting an impressive Glaswegian accent, and Sophie Okonedo, who is one of those well-known faces from TV that you can never quite place. BBC Radio 2’s Bob Harris also turns up as himself, being marvellously unconvincing as an actor!

But I don’t like country music?
Frankly neither do I. But it hardly matters. As long as you don’t ABSOLUTELY LOATHE it, I predict you’ll tolerate the tunes and enjoy the movie. Followers of this blog might remember that – against the general trend – I was highly unimpressed with “A Star is Born“. This movie I enjoyed far, far more.