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Roma (2018)
Roma (2018)
2018 | Drama
Amazing performances by leading actresses (0 more)
Left far too little on the cutting room floor (0 more)
Caught in a bad Roma
Contains spoilers, click to show
It’s been a long while since I watched a film deserving of a truly, harshly negative review. I have gotten so close so many times, and I’ll be damned if Netflix hadn’t gotten close to earning that with the fridge-logic that ruined Bird Box. Even Bird Box, though, feels enjoyable in retrospect compared to another Netflix exclusive: Alfonso Cuarón’s Roma.
Since I’m in a clear minority on this film, I feel obligated to preemptively address some common criticisms. If Roma had been produced in English, presented in color and with any score, it couldn’t fix the fact that I simply dislike Roma’s genre. Sure, I’ve liked slice-of-life drama films, and modern period pieces do fine by me. Pretentious Oscar-farming arthouse flicks like this, though, never win my praise.
Roma follows Cleo, a housemaid in Mexico City. Cleo has gotten pregnant and the presumed father, Fermín, leaves her to buy cigarettes before the baby’s even born. Her employer, Sofía, is dealing with a cheating spouse. What follows is two hours of both of these women marginally helping each other with their respective situations. As slice-of-life films do.
Since it's a slice-of-life film, much of the story just basically happens. You'll remember a scene here or there that happened, even if it was ultimately insignificant. In one scene for instance, Cleo goes to confront the baby daddy, who’s at a huge martial arts class. She spectates and proves to be the only one able to perform a certain yoga pose. Which is important because it helped add another few minutes to the film.
Cleo goes into labor not long after this confrontation, but her daughter ends up being stillborn. This all happens in the midst of the Corpus Christi Massacre. What the heck was the Corpus Christi Massacre, you may ask? According to this film, it was a brutal inconvenience on Cleo’s way to the hospital after her water breaks. This actual historical event simply happens and is never addressed for one second more. You know, just like in Titanic where the shipwreck just makes things inconvenient for Rose and Jack.
The last major scene in the film comes when Sofía invites Cleo to come with her family on a trip to the beach, not as staff but to help Cleo cope with the tragedy of losing her child. While they’re there, Sofía leaves the children in Cleo’s care for two freaking minutes, and two of the kids nearly drown. Cleo, though, can’t swim, and so she stands out in the water as the kids rescue each other. And that's about as close as Roma gets to a cohesive plot. Cleo only came with them to help her grieving, which meant she could be there to be powerless while her employer’s kids save each other’s lives. Bad things happen to us, the film teaches, so that good things can coincidentally happen in our proximity.
In fact, coincidence seems to be the running theme, here. Remember the Corpus Christi Massacre? No? What if I call it “the scene where Cleo goes into labor”? Maybe that helps? Fermín briefly held Cleo at gunpoint in the middle of it. Again, mere coincidence. Just like it’s a mere coincidence that she goes into labor the same day as a massacre that killed 120 people. As coincidences do.
Roma isn’t an aggressively bad film. There are a rare few moments within Roma’s 2-hour runtime where you think, “I can see that clip showing up during a Facebook video binge,” but again: These are moments more rare than our current president ordering a rare steak. That rarity has everything to do with the fact that the movie has so few moments, at all. The rest is shots that linger too long from angles that repeat themselves all too often. It’s like Cuarón asked someone, “What does a movie like Juno need to be better?” They responded, “Nothing.” So Cuarón packed Roma with nothing.
Which brings up one of my biggest criticisms of Roma: The cinematography is bland. Cuarón shot practically the entire film on one camera, set a specific distance from the subject, and kept takes running as longer than they should have, padding out a short-film’s worth of content to feature length. It’s bland cinematography that somehow earned an Oscar for Best Cinematography.
Gravity showed us what Cuarón was capable of. Beyond bringing a seemingly authentic view of space to the big screen, Gravity offered variety. Yes, the huge collision scene in Gravity takes on the feel of a one-take scene, but even then, the camera moves with the action. And if your attention moves away from the foreground the shot, you’re able to see other important things going on. With Roma, though, your foreground is your film. Period. And to be sure, you'll be kept at arm's length from that foreground at all times, both metaphorically and cinematically.
There's a number of reasons why Roma wasn't the Best Picture, this year. Gravity proved that Roma is not Cuarón’s best film. Bo Burnham–yes, that Bo Burnham–wrote and directed a better slice-of-life film with Eighth Grade. And Roma might not even be the past year’s best black-and-white film; I dare suggest that Cold War may have been better.
To give it the credit it’s due, Roma’s cast rightly earned nominations for their performances. Yalitza Aparicio and Marina de Tavira earned Best Actress nominations for their roles, and for their part, their performances were authentic as can be. It's the least the Academy could do for having them endure Cuarón's lengthy takes.
But now that I've given it credit, I demand my time back for the scene of Fermín going Star Wars Kid meets Full Monty.
  
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 2 (2011)
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 2 (2011)
2011 | Action, Drama, Family
The moment has come for every budding witch and wizard to say goodbye to the cash cow that has been the Harry Potter franchise and what a send-off he’s been given.

David Yates has once again returned to helm the final instalment in the most profitable movie franchise in history and whilst he has created a near perfect film technically, it falls down on a few points like a lack of character development and overly rushed script.

Deathly Hallows Part 2 picks up immediately from the 1st chapter with a quick reminder of what preceded it. This is a welcome start as the film feels a little disjointed in parts and if you’re not a loyal Harry Potter fan; chances are you won’t understand what’s going on.

Voldermort is gaining power as Harry, Ron and Hermione search for the missing horcruxes in order to destroy them and cripple the fearsome villain. Their travels bring them back to where it all started; Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardy; which has changed since we saw it last. Hogwarts has been rendered fabulously and is perhaps the best use of the 3D technology in the entire film. The sweeping shots of the lush, yet foreboding landscape surrounding the iconic castle are given new depth as we literally fly through the sky and smash through castle windows.

The decision to convert the film into 3D was met with mixed reviews from critics who said it would spoil a film which didn’t need it. To some extent this is true, there is a definite lack of focus throughout the film as the eye tries to focus on too many things at once, but it is far from the worst 3D conversion I’ve seen.

Performance wise, everyone has upped their game. The main trio have developed strong bonds with each other in real life and this really shows in the film as they battle against near certain death to protect one another. Daniel Radcliffe (Harry) is perhaps the weakest of the three in this film with Emma Watson (Hermione) and Rupert Grint (Ron) tied in first place. Their quiet demeanour is excitingly suffocating and brings a sense of claustrophobia to the film.

Of our veteran stars, Maggie Smith and Alan Rickman who play Professor McGonnagall and new headmaster Severus Snape are by far the standouts in a cast which are given a much greater chance to shine in this film. For a woman of Smiths age (76), she is exceptional and her performance really shows why Chris Columbus thought she would be perfect for the role all those years ago. Alan Rickman has been a favourite throughout the series and hasn’t let Potter fans down here, his final scenes are heart-breaking and worthy of a few tears.

Most of the other favourites make a welcome return, though all of them feel like cardboard cutouts, because their speech is limited to a couple of lines. Jim Broadbent (Horace Slughorn), Emma Thompson (Sybil Trelawny), Miriam Margolyes (Pomona Sprout) all make cameos in the film which is both a lovely and disappointing sight to see.

Ralph Fiennes does a lot of shouting throughout the film as vicious enemy Lord Voldermort but he performs well and does the role justice.

The only real flaw in the characters is that many of them aren’t given enough screen time. Helena Bonham Carter’s fabulous Bellatrix Lestrange is unfortunately lost as the army of Death Eaters grows and many other brilliant characters are only seen, not heard. (David Thewlis – Remus Lupin is the most prominent example of this.)

Being just over two hours in length means that this film is by far the shortest of the bunch and this shows in its pacing. Unfortunately, cutting the running time to this length has meant that certain scenes feel a little disjointed and certain parts, which were gut-wrenching in the book aren’t given enough time to digest in the film, which is disappointing seeing as an extra 10 or 20 minutes would’ve improved things greatly.

The climatic battle of Hogwarts as it’s been titled is fabulous and the special effects come into their own here as giants, acromantulas, death eaters and students pit themselves against one another with terrifying results. It’s a real treat to behold.

Yates’ cinematography is superb and every single shot he uses is beautiful in its own way. In one particular scene, located in the never before seen boathouse at Hogwarts, Yates manages to get around the 12A certificate which has blighted the last 4 films by shooting through frosted glass. I won’t spoil the scene for you, but it’s an emotional part of the film.

Moreover, the limbo scenes between Harry and Dumbledore, which were a low point in the novel, have been pleasingly shortened so that enough time is given to the main storylines. Unfortunately, the much talked about epilogue is too short and is a slightly anti-climatic send off for a film franchise that has been around for 10 years.

Overall, Harry Potter gets the send-off he deserved in a film which returns the magic and sparkle lost as the movies got darker. Yates has crafted a beautifully shot movie which doesn’t forget the action packed nature of its source material. Coupled with brilliant special effects and excellent performances by everyone involved, it’s a winning formula all round. The Harry Potter film franchise may have had a few lapses and a couple of disappointing outings, but thankfully the Deathly Hallows has made sure it ends on a high note. It may finish here, but when it ends this well, it most certainly won’t be forgotten.

https://moviemetropolis.net/2011/07/18/harry-potter-the-deathly-hallows-part-2-2011/
  
A Court of Thorns and Roses
A Court of Thorns and Roses
Sarah J. Maas | 2015 | Young Adult (YA)
8
8.7 (108 Ratings)
Book Rating
After reading the Throne of Glass series, I didn't think that I could love SJM's next series as much. How could it compare? It doesn't, but not in a bad way. While it's also a book about the Fae, a Court of Thorns and Roses is set in an entirely different world with its own set of unique characters. It is also vaguely a retelling, or reimagining, of the Beauty and the Beast fairytale, which I loved. The human and Fae worlds are separated by an invisible wall and a Treaty that was crafted after a brutal war which took place 500 years earlier.

We are first introduced to Feyre, a girl who tries to take care of her family as best she can despite being the youngest. It is on one of her trip into the forest to feed her family when she stumbles across the path of a wolf whilst hunting a deer. After shooting and killing both animals, she skins the wolf and carries the deer home for food. Unfortunately for her, the wolf was actually a Fae male and her actions force her to make a choice. Either be killed or live forevermore in the Fae realm.

It is not much of a choice and Feyre chooses to go with Tamlin to his estate in Prythian, the land of the Fae. Tamlin, she later discovers is not only a High Fae, but the Lord of the Spring Court and much more powerful than she realized. He is joined by Lucien, another High Fae who is originally from the Autumn Court and not much else besides a few workers. The large estate seems empty and a little bit sad.

As one can expect from a Beauty and the Beast retelling, the girl must fall in love with the shapeshifting Fae beast to break a curse. the curse is not known to the reader or Feyre until the end of the book. She must fight to prove her love under the most harrowing of situations and trials.

A must read, especially if you wish to find out what happens. Highly recommended for teen/young adult readers who like fantasy, supernatural creatures and magic. The world building is amazing, the magic is awe inspiring and the lands are populated by a variety of characters from the heroes to the villains, the cowards, the friends and the just plain misunderstood.

Reread Feelings:
Slight spoiler warning for ACOTAR and ACOWAR.

A second read-through of a Court of Thornes and Roses let me to notice a lot more details that I had missed during my first introduction to the world. The inspiration that the novel drew from Beauty and the Beast was also more prevalent than I had realized. Her family life and desire to protect those she loves is directly pulled and inspired by the original novel. Tamlin’s beast form and temper are also reminiscent of the Beast in the story.

Knowing how the book ends and what happens in ACOMAF, you can more clearly see the actions and personality of Tamlin. He is very protective of Feyre and a little bit controlling, but without any direct threat to her life it is not as apparent. The events that occurred Under the Mountain pushed him over the edge and turned that protectiveness dark. It became corrupted and too strong to be overlooked. He also has an explosive temper and anger, but you see it less frequently as the book goes on. That doesn’t mean it goes away, so his personality in the second book is not as surprising as I thought it was my first time reading the series. It still like him in this series, but I don’t love him as much as I did during the first read through.

The incredible world of Prythian is just so packed with different faeries, Courts, and intense story that you can’t focus on everything the first time you read it. You discover more magic the second, or third, time you read through the book because you know the story and can now also focus on the read of the world building and character development. To me, that is fantastic writing when you can always discover something new hidden in a book you love.

I fell in love with the series even more on the second read-through, especially Rhysand. You truly appreciate just how much he did for Feyre, not just healing her arm when she was on death’s door but mentally and emotionally supporting her when she was ready to give up. He puts on a dark front, but his every action belies his true feelings. Rhys lies to Amarantha about the identity of Tamlin’s human love, even though it could mean his end and his people’s if she discovers the truth. On multiple occasions, he plays the bad guy to maintain a façade but secretly does good. I appreciated and recognized his acts a lot more the second time reading, and it made me fall in love with his character even more.

Even though I know what happens in the book, the emotions are still so prevalent. You ride the story’s highs and lows, feel yourself filling with light when there is goodness, and fear for the dark. I can’t even describe my feelings. I was walking around my room reading the final pages as Feyre is being hurt – and someone calls out her name. I just sort of collapsed to the ground, with my hand on my heart and my feelings bursting from my chest about that particular Fae male. You could almost hear the pain and horror in his voice as he cried out for her, and it destroyed me. The final moments of the book were so beautiful and made me a little teary.
  
Mitropia
Mitropia
2020 | Ancient, Mythology
Have you ever had a crush on someone and just wanted to surround them with your presence? Too creepy? Okay, have you ever been at odds with your sworn enemies and learned to settle your differences by transporting yourselves to the plane of the gods to engage in a battle of strategic placement and enveloping in order to determine supremacy? Too specific? Well, the latter is the premise for the game Mitropia.

Mitropia is an area majority game that can end in several fashions. To setup your first game, please use the setup instructions in the rule book to form the playing area. However, the more you play, the more you might like to change it up and try out some wacky board formations. Every player receives a player mat featuring a tribe with different special abilities. They will each also receive the matching colored warrior tokens (and bag if present), cards from the two decks according to the setup in the rules. Each player will place their chieftan (two stacked warrior tokens) on the board. The game is ready to be played!

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a near-retail prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and I know the final components will be a little different from these shown (upgrades!). Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game – and the rules will certainly be tweaked from this version and the rules we used to play it. You are invited to download the rulebook from the publisher’s website, back the game through the Kickstarter campaign running April 16 – May 17, 2020, purchase it from your FLGS, or through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T

Game play is relatively simple. Players are attempting to score points by occupying and/or surrounding terrain tiles. Some tiles are worth more points than others depending on tribe abilities and other factors. The game ends once there are no more legal plays, all players have passed, or a chieftan has been captured by an opponent. Points are then tallied and a victor is determined.

On a turn, a player will make a “move,” which is a strange term as the player is actually placing out a warrior token. The placement of the warrior is dependent upon a move pattern card that is showing on the player mat, or one from the player’s hand to be discarded. These move cards show where the warrior can be placed (like Onitama‘s movement cards). Move cards can be combined with special action cards to make interesting warrior placement upon the board. Again, the goal of the game is to encompass as much terrain as possible, and surround your opponents to capture their warrior tokens.

In addition to simply placing out new warriors to claim lands and surround opponents, using terrain types to their fullest is a strategy not to be ignored. Wormholes are teleport locations, and mountains are impassable. Using just these features can wreak havoc on unsuspecting opponents. Mountains can especially be brutal when being used as an obstacle to facilitate surrounding enemies. When you play Mitropia be warned: mind the mountains.

Play continues in turns until a win condition or game end condition has been met. The players tally points to declare a victor, and then setup to play again for the player will definitely want to play another.

Components. Again, this is a near-retail prototype copy, so the components are very close to what will be available and in each box upon a successful Kickstarter campaign. That said, these components are amazing! I told the publisher the day after receiving the game that I was very impressed with what was packed in the box. Now, I haven’t been able to Tetris the components back in the box and have the cover fit flush since I opened it, but what is inside the box truly is wonderful. The player discs are all nicely-painted wood bits. The player mats, cards, and terrain tiles are all great quality. The art on everything is super stellar, and I just love playing with everything! You know the feeling when you’re playing a game that just has that perfect tactile quality? That’s Mitropia. And this copy isn’t even upgraded!

So here are my thoughts on this beast. I have never played Go, and I’m not really sure I want to after having Mitropia in my hands. I probably will play Go sometime, but I can only picture myself wishing I had been playing Mitropia. There is just something about having special abilities and slight differences that really improves my enjoyment. I love being able to see my turns several rounds in advance, but then having to switch tactics because an opponent has thwarted my evil plan at the last moment. I love being able to sit and think about my plays. I do not suffer from analysis paralysis, and this is a caveat I have for the game – do NOT play with AP-prone opponents. There is a lot going on here and so many options on a turn. AP sufferers can just stare at the board frightened of playing the wrong move or deciding whether or not to play a special ability card. However, I think this is a fantastic game with an excellent theme overlaid. If you are looking for a thematic game of Go that looks beautiful, is colorful instead of boring, allows players to have special powers and abilities, card play similar to the award-winning Onitama, then you certainly owe it to yourself to give a look at Mitropia. Please head over to the Kickstarter campaign that ends May 17, 2020 and check it out to learn even more and see what others are saying about it. I will be guarding my copy like you wouldn’t believe.
  
The Roads Not Taken (2020)
The Roads Not Taken (2020)
2020 | Drama
7
7.0 (2 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Javier Bardem and Elle Fanning act their socks off (1 more)
Robbie Ryan cinematography is Oscar worthy
Molly is a bit two-dimensional (0 more)
Pain and not a lot of Glory.
If you like your movies action packed you are going to dislike this movie. If you like light and uplifting stories you are going to positively loathe this one! For everyone else, "The Roads Not Taken" is a very thought-provoking piece of film-making from writer/director Sally Potter that I have a lot of respect for. Even more so, since I learned that the film is based on the director's time caring for her now deceased brother Nic, diagnosed with early onset dementia in 2010.

It's not a promising premise. "The Roads Not Taken" concerns a New Yorker with dementia being taking to the dentist and the opticians. Gripped yet? Nope... didn't think so. But stay with me here.

Elle Fanning plays Molly, daughter of the almost catatonic Leo (Javier Bardem) who is receiving a lot of support to stay in his own home. As his daughter assists him on his trip to his medical appointments, he is only about 10% 'there'. Glassy-eyed and almost incomprehensible, his utterances are often taken to refer to his present experiences. But actually, he's 90% somewhere else, revisiting two key episodes in his past life and reacting in the real world to what's happening in his dreams.

As he relives 'the roads not taken' we can piece together the elements of a life that's lived and - perhaps - lay out some elements that might have contributed to his mental decline in later life.

Before we plunge into the doom and gloom of the story, there was one moment of levity for me in the opening titles. I commented in my review of "The Farewell" that the company 'dog-tags' at the start of the film reminded me of a famous Family Guy comic moment. But this is kindergarten level compared to this movie. I assume Sally Potter must have tapped her complete phone contacts list to raise the funding for this one! Since I counted FOURTEEN different production companies referenced! Is this a record?

As you enter later life, it's common for many of us to suffer a significant source of stress. Sometimes - if you're lucky - four sources of stress. The reason? You stop worrying about your kids as much and start worrying about your aged parents and in-laws. Like heating up a frog in water, it's often imperceptible how much stress you are actually carrying with that until the last of the relatives 'shuffles off this mortal coil'. Within the grief, there's also a source of guilty relief in there somewhere. Such is the maelstrom that young Molly is in - with knobs on - given the disability of Leo. As a professional in her 20's, she is also having the juggle this responsibility with progressing her career.

It's a bit early in this turbulent year to talk of Oscar nominations. But for me, there are three standout performances in this movie:

1) Javier Bardem: what an acting masterclass! As with Daniel Day-Lewis's win in 1990 for "My Left Foot", the Academy loves a disability-based performance. I haven't seen much Oscar-buzz about this performance, but I'd personally throw his hat into the ring, for at least my long-list;

2) Elle Fanning: this young lady has been in movies since the age of 2, but rose to stardom with "Super 8". She's building a formidable filmography behind her. Here she matches Bardem shot-for-shot in the acting stakes: a caring daughter being emotionally torn apart; always needing to be in two places at the same time (as nicely positioned by the cryptic ending). A first Oscar-nomination perhaps?

3) Robbie Ryan: with an Oscar-nom previously for "The Favourite", could another one follow for this? For this is a beautiful film to look at, despite its downbeat story. There are some drop-dead gorgeous shots. One in particular is where a sun-lit Fanning has a "Marilyn Monroe subway skirt moment" at a window (with her hair being blown, I should add). Glorious. And all of the Mexican/Greek scenes (all Spain I believe) are deliciously lit and coloured.

"The Roads Not Taken" is an intelligent watch for sure, and reminiscent to me of Almodovar's "Pain and Glory": another artist's life lived again in flashback. If anything, this one is more unstructured in setting out a box of jigsaw pieces that you need to piece together through the unreliable narrator's random memories. ("Ooh, look - here's a bit with Laura Linney on it... ah, that goes there"; "So that's who Selma Hayek is"; etc.) But, as with a jigsaw, staying the course and putting the last pieces in is a very satisfying experience.

There's also a really feelgood scene in a taxi rank that restores your faith in the underlying goodness of people.... and a rant by a "Trump-voter" that gives you quite the opposite view!

Where I found some frustration was in the lack of backstory for Molly. She seems to be painted rather two-dimensionally. Yes - young with job, but of her personal life we see nothing. Adding another dimension (a young family for example) would have added yet another set of stresses to the mix. Leo's flashbacks are also focused on just two time periods. More wide-ranging reminiscences might have broadened the drama.

But I personally found "The Roads Not Taken" intensely moving. I'm not sure I could say I "enjoyed" it, but it is a worthy watch and has left me with thought-provoking images to chew on.

(For the full graphical review, please check out the One Mann's Movies here https://bob-the-movie-man.com/2020/09/15/the-roads-not-taken-2020-pain-and-very-little-glory/.)
  
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016)
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (2016)
2016 | Comedy, Horror, Romance
A film for all those women who dream of chivalry, but want to kick some ass.
Contains spoilers, click to show
"It is a truth universally acknowledged that a zombie in possession of brains must be in want of more brains."

A mysterious plague has fallen across England. The countryside is a relative haven, where the city has become a playground for unmentionables. The oriental arts have become the fashion and a desirable young lady no longer needs to be the prim and proper wife, unless your name is Mr Collins.

The Bennet's lovely daughters, beautiful and strong of body and mind are accustomed to a regimented life of training, until the handsome stranger Mr Bingley comes to the country. A whirlwind of romance and the undead lead them into a battle for family and love.

Heaving bosoms, country estates. Brain eating corpses and assorted weaponry. Everything you'd expect when the undead meets Jane Austen. As if on cue my playlist has shuffled to Zombie by The Cranberries. I can't deny enjoying this film, I should point out that I was always going to enjoy it, be it Oscar or Razzie worthy. It definitely had the potential to be an epic re-watchable classic or the B-movie winner that shone from the book.

When it was first published I picked it up almost instantly and soon found Quirk Books and other crossover books developing a little shrine-like area. [Now given pride of place in my nerd room.] Having a dislike of classics embedded in me from school and enjoying the general kick-assery of action films, it was a great crossover to bring those classics back into my life.
 
Admission time, while I've read the book I can't actually remember when, it was dozens of books ago. I loved it but not everyone did. I'm going to make a big sweeping statement. [Sorry, not sorry] It's not a Jane Austen book people, get over it. "He's ruined Elizabeth Bennet!" No he's taken a strong minded female character and put her in a new fantasy setting. I'm sure there would have been less objections if all the names were different (and the title too) and it was just described as "loosely based on Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice". But swings and roundabouts, because it probably wouldn't have been as popular if it wasn't called Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

Sam Riley's Mr Darcy was no Colin Firth, but it was still very good. It did kind of seem like they threw him in a lake because they felt they should pay homage to Firth's dunking.

Note to those who see the film, Liz Bennet's heaving bosom is seen on a regular basis and is entirely distracting. I'm not sure there's a plot line linked to them, they're just always there, they probably should have got their own credit for the part.

I think my favourite scene was where Darcy came to Elizabeth to proclaim his love... and then they proceed to beat each other with sticks, books, basically whatever is to hand. Heated and packed with sexual tension it made for entertaining viewing. It also reminded me of the scene in Buffy where the slayer and Spike fight in an abandoned building, and the amount of sexual tension between the pair results in breaking the building, amongst other things... but those other things probably wouldn't work so well in Austen's time.

Even with all the bits that brought a smile to my face and made for enjoyable watching, there were some things I couldn't help but be annoyed with.


Firstly, Matt Smith, my dear number 11... [insert long silence here] I know Mr Collins is there for the annoying comic relief and awkwardness but oh my god. It was too much and I was overcome with annoyance. The cast is made up of relatively unknown people, with the exceptions of Charles Dance, Sally Phillips and Matt Smith. I can't help but wonder if Mr Collins would have been easier to deal with if he was an unknown actor.

The camera work had its own peculiarities. Some shots were taken from the zombies point of view. They were blurred and frustrating to watch, I can't really tell what it added. I'm sure it would have added a bit more drama if you'd seen the potential victim being run at. Again, I'm not an expert in showbiz filming but I'm fairly certain that making your audience want to throw up is not the idea. Right near the end there is a shot that perfectly portrays the devastation of the situation...

"How should we get across the devastation of the city and cut out to the next scene?"
"Spin the camera round until people want to vomit?"
"GENIUS!"

I sat there feeling a bit woozy, trying to avoid looking at the screen for the whole thing. I'm not sure either of the fancy styles really improved anything.

My only other wonder about the film is whether it should have gone all out spoof. This was a sensible spoof [relatively speaking], in that it wasn't made specifically for laughs. It did have some, but there were also some moments of emotion too. Should they have played the film out for more comedy? Who knows, but I feel the scene where Darcy and Elizabeth are stabbing a field to kill zombies that are buried underneath was completely wasted in a sensible spoof!

All in all I did enjoy it, but for those of you looking to see it at the cinema I'm not sure it's worth a £10 ticket. Well worth it if you have an offer of some description though. Just remember going in to it that it isn't Jane Austen, it's just your run of the mill zombie period drama... wow, never thought I'd say that sentence.
  
X-Men: Dark Phoenix (2019)
X-Men: Dark Phoenix (2019)
2019 | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
Ever since X-men First Class was released, Jean Gray one of the more pivotal characters in the X-Men universe has been surprisingly absent. Often portrayed at not only having psychic abilities that rivals Charles Xavier, but also attracted the admiration of both Cyclops and Wolverine. While she was a staple in the original film and subsequent sequels her first appearance in the newest series did not occur until X-Men Apocalypse. With the release of Dark Phoenix, we had hoped to finally get an opportunity to explore a bit of her background story and her transformation into Dark Phoenix.

Dark Phoenix begins on a small country road where a very young Jean Grey is arguing with her parents over what music to listen to. In traditional parent fashion, her mother reminds her that the driver is the one who chooses the music and when she is old enough to drive she can choose her own music. This small disagreement turns into a deadly confrontation, when the young Jean, unable to control her vast powers causes her mom to fall asleep at the wheel, resulting in a head on collision killing both her parents. The doctors are amazed that this young girl has survived without a single scratch and a young Charles Xavier arrives to take her to a place where she can be safe.

Fast Forward to the year 1992 where the space shuttle Endeavor, on a routine mission, encounters a cosmic entity that cripples it in space. The X-men, who are now looked at as heroes by most of the world are tasked to bring the astronauts safely home, it’s a dangerous mission, but one that Charles feels will further cement the hero status of his team and continue to grow trust between mutants and humans alike. The mission goes surprisingly without incident until Jean and Night Crawler attempt to rescue the final remaining astronaut from the doomed shuttle. Night Crawler quickly teleports the astronaut to safety, but Jean is caught by the full force of the cosmic entity, absorbing it completely and destroying the shuttle. The team scrambles to locate her, and with the help of Night Crawler are once again able to bring her back to the safety of the X-Jet. Relieved that she has somehow miraculously survived the encounter the team is unaware that Jean and themselves will never be the same again.

As we’ve come to expect from the previous X-men movies, a star-studded cast leads the way. Familiar cast members such as Jennifer Lawrence (Raven), Tye Sheridan (Cyclops) and James McAvoy (Charles Xavier) are joined once again by Sophie Turner as the iconic Jean Grey. Sophie does an incredible job at bringing out both the uncertainty in her character and the extreme anger and rage that flows through her. Unfortunately for such a major character the movie only briefly touches the surface of who Jean Grey really is. The movie, even from the start tends to focus on Jean as a dangerous and angry young lady, unable to control her emotions which will ultimately open the doorway to her alter ego Dark Phoenix. The movie unfortunately treats her as a one-off character and skips most of her back story choosing to focus only on her Dark Phoenix personality. This leaves the audience with no understanding of the person she was prior to the transformation, only seeing Jean as an uncontrollable child who has now become an uncontrollable adult with “off the chart” powers. While Charles and other members of the team try to assure those around them (and the audience seated in the theaters) that Jean is a good person, a person worth saving, there is very little in the movie that allows us to sympathize with her plight. It ultimately villainizes her and leaves much of the cast (and the audience) wondering whether destroying her is the right choice for all humankind.

Visually Dark Phoenix is a masterpiece, whether it’s the awe-inspiring deepness of space, or the incredible visual effects as the mutants square off against each other with their powers. Buildings topple, subway cars are pulled from underground and general mayhem takes the stage. This is certainly one of the more action-packed movies in the series and getting the opportunity to watch some of our favorite mutants square off against one another is enough to excite even the ones least interested in the franchise.

Dark Phoenix as one might expect is also one of the darkest of the x-men movies. Unlike its other Marvel film counterparts, there is no levity in the movie at all. There are scenes that are heartwarming, but the movie takes itself very seriously. Even in a similarly dark Marvel movie Endgame there were moments that would make you laugh regardless of how dire the situation was, Dark Phoenix is not like this at all. It carries a weight to it that ensures that not only the people on screen, but those in the audience understand how truly dire the situation is. It detracts a bit from the spirit of the source material it derives from and could potentially alienate its core audience. This is a very adult movie, that deals with some very adult themes and parents might want to think twice before taking their youngest to see this film. With the X-Men franchise finally joining the MCU, it’ll be interesting to see how movies down the road treat these characters.

Dark Phoenix represents the end of an X-Men era that has existed in both its original and First-Class installments for over twenty years. The acquisition of Fox by Disney now brings this venerable franchise to the MCU family along with its cast of seemingly endless characters. While the movie is certainly better than Apocalypse, it can’t quite reach the heights of either First-Class or Days of Futures Past. The Dark Phoenix storyline does a good job staying closer to its comic book roots than its previous outing but rushes the origin and character development of Jean far more than she deserves. It’s a fine ending to the series as a whole but can’t quite deliver in all the ways I hoped it would.
  
Hellboy (2019)
Hellboy (2019)
2019 | Action, Adventure, Fantasy
Trivia question for you…what does an immortal evil queen, King Arthur, Nazis and a boy born from Hell itself have in common? If you answered Hellboy you win a prize. The prize is going to the theater and watching the film and whether it’s a prize worth winning is something you’ll have to decide for yourself. I’m getting a bit ahead of myself though, so let’s rewind a bit and start at the beginning.

Hellboy (David Harbour) is a demon from Hell (hence the name), his backstory as we learn early on in the movie is pretty standard fare. The Nazi’s are on the verge of losing World War II and in a desperate move to turn the tide call upon the evil sorcerer Rasputin to call upon the depths of Hell and raise a champion who will fight for them. The incantation is interrupted when famous Nazi hunter Lobster Johnson (Thomas Haden Church) goes in with guns blazing, as other allied troops join the fray. Their relief at stopping the incantation is short-lived as the alter opens and a young demon climbs through. Professor Broom who had infiltrated the Nazi team had been brought in to put down any evil that was successfully summoned. Upon seeing the young demon, Professor Broom (for reasons known only to him at the time) decides not to kill him, but to take him in and raise him as his own.

Flash forward to present day, and Hellboy as we now know him alongside his father are members of the B.P.R.D (Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defense). On a mission to defeat some giants that are roaming the countryside in England they stumble upon an ancient evil that dark forces are trying to retrieve. It seems back in the dark ages a war between humans and monsters was being waged. Seeing no end to the violence King Arthur (Mark Stanley) and his faithful wizard Merlin (Brian Gleeson) offer to surrender to The Blood Queen (Milla Jovovich). On top the hill where the surrender is to take place, the Blood Queen is betrayed by one of her own and King Arthur, using the infamous blade Excalibur, cut the Blood Queen into several parts. While she can’t be killed, she can be contained and each of her body parts are placed in separate boxes. These boxes are then sealed with holy water that only a holy man can unlock and are sent to the farthest corners of England. If the Blood Queen ever returns, she will release a plague that will not only destroy England but spread across the entire world. Thus, sets the stage for Hellboy.

Being a fan of the previous movies and in particular the portrayal of Hellboy by Ron Pearlman, I wasn’t sure how to feel about David Harbour in this role. It’s always a bit hit or miss when a series is rebooted, and I was pleasantly surprised with how David Harbour stepped up and into the role. While he doesn’t have the same menacing size and gruffness that Ron Pearlman possesses, it didn’t take me long to adjust to this new version. He is joined by a strong supporting cast consisting of Sasha Lane as his ghost whispering friend Alice and Ben Daimo as an MI-11 agent weary of teaming up with a monster. Milla Jovovich does an outstanding job as the Blood Queen and her fairy-pig friend portrayed by Stephen Graham and Douglas Tait.

Visually the movie is stunning, with the numerous monsters and fairy creatures coming to life before your eyes. The movie is exceptionally gory as one might expect, with numerous limb dismemberments, decapitations, and more blood than anyone would expect to erupt from such wounds. It’s over-the-top and meant to be that way which tended to bring some uncomfortable laughter at times from those around me. Having recently played Mortal Kombat 11, I couldn’t help but feel that some of the fatality screens in that game would have felt right at home in this movie.

Story is where I feel Hellboy falls a bit flat. There are so many characters and side stories going on that it’s easy to get lost in it. From my description above, you can see that it includes King Arthur, Rasputin, Nazis, Secret Societies, Witches that eat children, monsters…and that’s only in the first half of the movie. There is a ton going on and there are a lot of disconnects. While trying to avoid spoilers, there is a part in the film where Hellboy is talking to Baba Yaga (see another character reference), and after tricking her she places a curse on him. I’m still trying to figure out if the curse she placed on him occurred in the movie or not. In fact, I’m trying to figure out exactly what the point of that scene was. It’s not a bad story, but it tries to pack in a TON of references in its brief hour and forty five-ish minutes.

I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve never read any of the Hellboy graphic novels, I have seen both of the previous films, so I had a little bit of background going into this movie. I don’t know if all the references in the movie are pivotal to the novels or not. You certainly don’t have to have read them or seen the previous movies to appreciate this one, I just wonder if they tried to fit in too many Hellboy references into one film. Hellboy is an enjoyable ride, and it certainly doesn’t drag at all, in fact I was surprised at how quickly it was over. With all that being said, it’s a fun action-packed movie, with lots of gratuitous violence if that’s your thing. I certainly wouldn’t recommend taking your children to see it, violence aside, I just think there is way too much going on and it can be difficult to follow. Oh, and don’t forget to stay through the credits for the end credit scene. It’s not pivotal to the movie, but worth waiting around for.
  
Space Kraken
Space Kraken
2021 | Adventure, Book, Dice Game, Exploration, Horror
The overall story is not unfamiliar. Scientists create a genetically-modified creature to help solve a global problem, creature is somehow mutated through radioactive exposure, creature poses a threat to mankind, mankind must eliminate the creature. Now take that monster to space and BAM – we’ve got the origins on Space Kraken. Humanity has been forced to space in search of a new inhabitable planet. But alien races await you in the vast unknown, and the Space Kraken is always lurking…

Disclaimer: We were provided with a demo version of Space Kraken. The gameplay is that of the full version, just with a shorter storyline and fewer variations. What you see pictured below may not be identical to what will be received in the finalized version. Also, the game can be played solo or with multiple players – this preview will be covering the solo-only mode of play. I do not intend to cover the entire rulebook, but rather provide an overview of the mechanics and gameplay. -L

Space Kraken is a sci-fi dungeon crawler encompassed in a spiral-bound book. The only additional components you need are 2d6, 1d20, and a pencil with a decent eraser. To start a new game, you will first get set up for the campaign. There are 6 Flights (game modes) to choose from and you select one with which to play. Different Flights affect the start of game conditions, which will affect the overall gameplay. For example, one Flight might offer bonuses to your ability scores, while another could give you stronger weapons right from the start. Once you’ve selected your Flight, you will then set up your Story Lines. These will help dictate the story of your overall campaign, and will be influenced by your strategies and decisions along the way. From crucial plot points to opportunities for ‘side quests,’ the Story Lines work to drive the narrative. The next step is to create your crew. You choose 3 heroes to start with, and will ‘build’ them by giving them attributes, equipment, and skills. The specific parameters are detailed in the rules. After the crew is created, the game is officially ready to begin!

A game of Space Kraken is played over a series of turns, broken down into 5 phases. The first phase of a turn is to Activate Story Lines. These are tracked across a series of 4 tables of coordinates. Find the coordinate on the appropriate table for your Story Line, and proceed as necessary. Some coordinates link to Events that require you to make decisions, roll dice, execute commands, while other coordinates will just link to a new coordinate to be used next turn. Once you have Activated and resolved all your Story Lines for the turn, the game moves to the Ship Construction phase. At the start of the game, you will most likely skip this phase, but as the game progresses and you earn funds, you will be able to upgrade and modify your spaceship during this part of the turn.


The third phase of a turn is to Perform Your Own Action. You can choose to either: Initiate Space Flight, Land at an Already-Discovered Location, or Activate a Story Line Again. Initiating space flight gives you the opportunity to explore different regions of space, discover/explore new locations, and sometimes even engage in space combat. You could choose to land at an already-discovered location, which allows you to visit many of the ‘dungeons’. Or you can activate a story line again, which lets you advance one of your story lines forward. After you perform your own action, phase 4 begins – Quick Visit a Shop, Ammo Dealer, or Quest Master. This one is pretty self-explanatory. You can trade or purchase goods from locations you have visited, or you could visit the Quest Master for ‘side quests.’ And then finally the last turn phase is Quest Timer. Any quests you have that were not advanced in this turn get a mark for Lost Time – after 5 marks they are erased! So prioritize wisely when it comes to your quest completion. A new turn now begins, following the same phase structure as detailed above. The game continues until either you have defeated the Space Kraken, or your entire crew and/or ship has perished.
At first glance, Space Kraken is kind of daunting and intimidating. There’s a bit of a learning curve as you figure out this gameplay system before you can really dive in to play. That being said, once you understand how the different aspects work – Space Flight, Combat, Story Lines, Dungeon Exploration, etc. – it will all click together. This isn’t a game you just pick up and decide to play on a whim, it’s one that takes focus and dedication to complete a play-through. Just something to keep in mind! As with most campaign-style games, the question of replayability is always in the forefront, and I think that Space Kraken really handles it very well. The Story Lines alone offer a range of variability that ensures no two games will be the same. How you build your crew and ship could influence decisions made with regards to Story Lines, which in turn leads you down a unique path with a plethora of opportunities. The mechanic for generating new locations to explore (the dungeon crawling element) also provides a variety of places to explore, alien races to interact with, and physical elements like atmosphere. The chances for generating the exact same location more than once are pretty slim, I would say. All of these elements just add to the replayability of Space Kraken and keep it fresh and unique for each play-through.

Guiding the overall gameplay are your dice. Some Story Lines offer 2 solutions, and you will roll the dice to see with which one you end up. To generate a new location, you roll the dice a number of times, looking at the corresponding tables in order to build the map for your current foray into space. Obviously, combat, either in ships or on the ground, will use dice to help dictate the flow of battle and the outcomes of said fights. That is how you can get so much replayability from this game – dice rolling. The range of Story Lines and locations coupled with dice rolls really create a one-of-a-kind gameplay experience, no matter how many times you play through. You’ll never play the same game twice….well, unless your dice results are the exact same for every roll as they were the previous game.


Let’s touch on components for a minute. As stated above, this is only a demo version of the game. That being said, the game is encompassed in a spiral-bound book, and that is what the complete game will be like too. The only things you need to play besides the book are a couple of d6, a d20, and a pencil! I think it’s neat that so much gameplay can be packed into a single book. Between sessions if you’re not able to leave the book on your table, simply mark your page, fold everything back into the book, and you’re good to go! What do I mean by fold everything back into the book? Several of the pages in this game have fold-outs of additional materials to be pulled out when necessary. I really like that if you don’t currently need a page, it doesn’t need to be showing. It helps keep the game a little more focused, visually, in my opinion. My only complaint is that a couple of times, a fold-out section may overlap another fold-out section, meaning that you have to end up flipping pages anyway. A small price to pay for an all-in-one game book! My other qualm is that as you play, you will write in the book. After you complete a play-through, you can go back and play again – just erase everything and start over. My concern is that with repeated erasing on the pages, the quality will wear down and could be unusable after a certain number of plays. Maybe that’s not a problem for other gamers, but that is something that jumped into my head when playing this.
Overall thoughts? Space Kraken is pretty cool. There is a bit of a learning curve as you delve into the new system, but once you’ve got the general mechanics/gameplay down, the rest is pretty straight-forward. The fact that the entire game is encompassed in one book is a neat element too. It allows you to ‘save’ your progress and come back to it without the hassle of setting up a million components. Having only played the solo version of the game, I’m curious to see how the multiplayer side works, so that may just be my next play-through! If you’re in the market for a campaign-style game, without requiring tons of table space and eons of time to play through, consider checking out Space Kraken. It successfully funded on Kickstarter and the late pledges are now open!
  
Eon: Dragoneye Reborn (Eon, #1)
Eon: Dragoneye Reborn (Eon, #1)
Alison Goodman | 2008 | Science Fiction/Fantasy, Young Adult (YA)
8
8.0 (8 Ratings)
Book Rating
Both books are extremely long, but Eon and Eona are one of the best dragon books I've read - out of the few I've read so far.

Eon does start out pretty slow. It takes awhile for something to happen, and there's a political struggle for a good chunk in the middle - a complete (and perhaps unnecessary at times) possibility as to why the book was extremely long in the first place.

Eona, as Eon at the time, was an extremely annoying character. It takes her AGES to connect all the dots and she's extremely desperate to fit in. It's almost as though she hates being a female, even though she gets points for being a sword-wielding, kick-butt, no-nonsense character.

Eona, on the other hand, is longer than Eon. After the events of Eon, the Empire of Celestial Dragons are in chaos, and Eona and her allies are on the run.

Eon has now stopped with her disguise, but I don't like her any better than I liked Eona puttering around like a boy. In Eon, Eona was just desperate to fit in and make herself seem worthy. In the sequel, Eona just argues FAR too much with Kygo.

Eona, however long, definitely makes up for the many dull moments in the first book. It's much more engrossing and action-packed, bringing a fantastic end to two very long books.

<b>Eon</b> - Full Review
Blog: <a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2014/12/review-eon-by-alison-goodman.html">http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2014/12/review-eon-by-alison-goodman.html</a>;
Goodreads: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1038182170?book_show_action=false">https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1038182170?book_show_action=false</a>;

<b>Eona</b> - Full Review
Blog: <a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2015/01/review-eona-by-alison-goodman.html">http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2015/01/review-eona-by-alison-goodman.html</a>;
Goodreads: <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1134057091?book_show_action=false">https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1134057091?book_show_action=false</a>;

Merged review:

The entire idea behind Eon, according to the Alison Goodman's note at the very last page of the book, was inspired by the cultures and histories of China and Japan. Of course I would be completely excited because I'm Chinese myself and dragons are wonderfully majestic and mystic creatures. I had to read it!

I also had to read it because I would then have the opportunity to not only debate with the only guy in book club (who actually recommended the book to me in the first place... are you happy?), but I would also get to throw a book at said guy. Actually, it would be throwing the book first, run away, and then maybe debate about it. But one can't debate when one runs away.

In reality, I did get the chance to smack him with Eon. He then "abused" me with his scarf throughout Lit class. One day, I plan to steal that scarf and hide it.

I don't intend to ever give it back either.

Eon is a fabulous idea. And I mean, phenomenal. The best dragon book I've ever read despite the flaws and not so phenomenal things, even though the amount of dragon books I've read in the past is relatively small. Goodman has certainly done a fantastic job with the world building of the Empire of Celestial Dragons and the dragons itself – a brief history of the Dragoneyes and the Dragons are compressed at the very beginning of the book (it was a bit confusing to me) and the rest is filled in throughout the process of the book.

I have to say I'm impressed. Quite impressed compared to my latest reads (Okay, they're not shabby, but I wasn't overly excited about them either).

The beginning of the book lacked a bit of what would have made the book so much better. All Eon and the other Dragoneye candidates do is train, train, train. Eon is made fun of by everyone – including his Swordmaster! – because he's not like the others, etc. Basically, life is all about that misery for Eon and the book follows the same pattern over and over again: train, disdain, train, disdain, train, disdain.

Oh, and it doesn't help he's really a girl, though approximately 99.9% of the people don't know (they do know he's crippled). I'm pretty confused as to what gender to use in this particular review. That, however, does not mean I'm a sexist. All I can say to this entire ordeal is the mere fact that it seems Eon is trying too hard to hide her true self. Not a problem with me because of the time period Goodman sets Eon in. But with the amount of Sun drugs she takes later in the book – I think those so called Sun drugs are simply crack – in an attempt to connect with the Mirror Dragon, it's really obvious Eon is desperate enough to fit in and prove herself worthy of being a part of the Dragoneye council.

It's not until the anticipation of finding out who the new Rat Dragoneye apprentice will be does the book become interesting. The majority of the rest becomes more of a political struggle among the Dragoneye council and the Empire of Celestial Dragons as Eon continues her training as the one and only Mirror Dragoneye since the last 500 years, with the pressure of the Emperor's supporters resting on her shoulders.

Quite a burden to bear. Plus, the middle seemed to drag a bit (read: political struggle). It even got to the point where I actually thought Eon would be better off if the story had been split into two books and the series into a trilogy instead of duology.

It didn't help with Eon as a character either. She is, by far, one of the most annoying characters I've ever met. Here's a bit of a sidenote: There aren't many Asians as main characters. They're usually the peeps on the sidelines, and even that rarely happens. When they ARE main characters, they're usually a sword-wielding, kick-butt, no-nonsense type of character (or they seem to be annoyingly stereotyped and I hate it, so I don't even bother reading it in the first place). And while Goodman does incorporate all of that in Eon's character (the kick-butt, not the stereotype), it was still very annoying to see Eon puttering about and taking forever to connect the dots (read: desperate to fit in).

The ending gets better – much better – than the beginning and the middle (read: beginning = training + disdain, middle = political struggle + desperation). The fantastic ending probably made up for the hiccups earlier throughout and possibly changed my mind about wanting to split the book in half. Eon is a semi-phenomenal ending to a phenomenal idea in a not so phenomenal first book in a duology, and I've yet to decide whether I should give the sequel a whirl to see if it improves compared to Eon.
<blockquote>Friendship is not something that can be forced.</blockquote>
(Except for one of my friends. According to him, he forced his way into us being friends. *sigh*)
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Original Review posted at <a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2014/12/review-eon-by-alison-goodman.html">Bookwyrming Thoughts</a>
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