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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Transformers (2007) in Movies

Jul 4, 2021

Transformers (2007)

2007 | Action, Sci-Fi

7.1

(42 Ratings)

Movie Rating

In retrospect - this essentially becoming the template for the modern blockbuster and all - it's crazy to me how bonkers this was considered back in the day despite being almost entirely held back by its simplicity and formality. You've got almost two and a half hours to make a movie about alien robot vehicles who come to Earth and fuck shit up... and you decided to go with making most of it a rigorously exhausting expository bore? Yes it's racist and sexist and jingoistic and all that too, but that's a given with Bay. What isn't - however - is how much the action lacks any pop or clarity. There's a ton of impressive (for the time) CGI and no shortage of practical effects either but it's too shaky and overcut to really enjoy any of it. The first hour where this is a weird sci-fi/action comedy about a car that really wants to help Shia LaBeouf (who is excellent in this, btw) fuck Mega Fox is no joke worlds better than the flat action - which is tepidly amusing at best. And it's of course shameful how obviously oversexualized Fox's character is, but that's only made like 100 times worse by the fact that she's supposed to be like 16/17 in this. Not to mention the robot designs - and I realize I'm in the minority here - are ass ugly imo. Yes they're 'realistic' but they don't lend themselves to being very watchable especially during the fights. As a Bay defender, this was hugely disappointing. At least a lot of the jokes land?

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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Sonic the Hedgehog (2020) in Movies

Dec 16, 2020

Sonic the Hedgehog (2020)

2020 | Action, Adventure, Animation

7.2

(50 Ratings)

Movie Rating Watch

Kind of shit, but a total blast where it counts. I have so many grievances, firstly - did this honestly have to take the form of one of those trite, throwaway kids' films from the 90s/2000s where some obnoxious animal/alien has to team up with a bland cardboard cutout fuck and they learn to love alone the way? Gag, I feel deep shame that my peer group has such devout nostalgia for such a bastardized, lazy corporate gash-grab of a film era - which is of course is only exacerbated more so here by Fowler shooting this thing about as blandly as can be. Not to mention Marden absolutely sucks in it doing - what I can only assume is - some sort of scuffed, bored Ryan Reynolds impersonation. But it's easy to forgive a film that gives such ample time to Jim Carrey (in like his... third or fourth "return to form" now?) giving the single greatest performance of 2020 in a loving homage to the OG elastic, hyperactive roles of which he built his career upon. The action is fair, and for all its deafening faults the final showdown between Sonic and Eggman is exhilarating (even if I find Ben Schwartz's Sonic voice to be mostly a non-presence). Cute and fun enough to suffice - frequently hilarious too - but not really the resuscitator of video game movies when we got the sumptuous and similarly nonsensical 𝘈𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯'𝘴 𝘊𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘥 just over three years before it. Truthfully I think this would have been better if they kept that monstrous abomination Sonic from the first trailer.