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Zombie Strippers (2008)
Zombie Strippers (2008)
2008 | Comedy, Horror
4
5.0 (8 Ratings)
Movie Rating
In the not too distant future where George Bush has somehow fluked his way into another term as president, a chemo-virus has broken out in a small town. The Z-Squad is sent in to eliminate the problem, but a member of the squad gets infected and flees. He manages to to find refuge in an underground strip club, which has also been deemed illegal by the government of the future. The soldier takes a turn for the worse and finds himself a member of the undead only to take the club's biggest star as his first victim. She continues to dance and the odd thing is...the customers love it. Zombie strippers are the new sex appeal. As the money piles up, so do the victims. Will the chemo-virus continue to spread and if so...how will it be contained?

First of all, don't be confused. This is movie is one of the cheesiest films ever. I almost turned it off several times and I honestly can't tell you why I'm reviewing this thing. The sad thing is it's like a trainwreck in slow motion. You can't look away from it once you start watching and you have to see not only how it's going to end, but who's going to make it out alive. Not that you really care, but you wonder whose really deemed worthy of surviving said trainwreck. It is ludicrous, ridiculous, and absurd...but it's amusing as hell.

How ridiculous is it? Let's see...strippers being turned into zombies and becoming super strippers, zombies being sexy, having the most stereotypical Mexican janitor...ever, the casts biggest names being Jenna Jameson and Robert Englund, special effects you'd find in Xena: Warrior Princess, a Christian stripping for her nanna, Jenna Jameson shooting ping pong balls and pool balls out her...well...I'll let you see that for yourself, angry dragons, and foamy chewbaccas...the list goes on and on. I'm sure I missed so many more. The sad thing is that despite being the cheesiest of cheese and being as bad as it is, there's still a few good things buried under the cheese. It's kind of like an enchilada made with cheap cheese. All the cheap stuff is on the outside, but there's some good stuff on the inside. The most obvious being that there's a lot of nudity in this, which is good because it'll probably be one of the only things that'll keep anyone watching. Robert Englund's over the top performance as the germophobic strip club owner is pretty memorable. Also, the make-up effects are surprisingly good at times. The special effects are horrid, but the make-up is actually better than you think it'd be.

In a film as ridiculously cheesy as this, I can't blame anyone if they turn it off before it reaches the half hour mark. The thing is though if you stick with it, it's actually enjoyable because it's so bad. It's cheesy, it's amusing, the acting is so bad that you'll be quoting it for days, the plot is pointless, and it even has a weak attempt at a twist in the ending! My point is that it's a bad film and I'm not defending it, but if you manage to sit through the whole thing...you may find yourself enjoying parts of it like I did.
  
Operation: Hail Storm
Operation: Hail Storm
Brett Arquette | 2016 | Science Fiction/Fantasy
6
4.7 (3 Ratings)
Book Rating
<i>I received this eBook for free from the author in exchange for an honest review.</i>

In the near distant future, terrorism is still a major problem throughout the world. Other things may have changed, such as a female president of the United States and cheaper method of producing energy, however, the world is still under threat, particularly from North Korea. After losing his wife and twin daughters in the biggest terrorist attack the world has seen, Physics Nobel Prize winner, Marshall Hail, an industrial billionaire, decides to take matters into his own hands.

<i>Operation: Hail Storm </i>is a work of science fiction, although, as the main character points out, he and his team only work with science and not fiction. With a selection of friends from his MIT days, and a pick of young gamers whose families had been killed in the terrorist attacks, aim to remove everyone listed on the FBI’s top ten terrorist list. After his drones successfully take out the leader of North Korea, Hail finds himself of interest to the CIA and US president.

Hail hopes the CIA would be pleased with him and supply a list and location of the remaining terrorists. Although they are impressed, the CIA is baffled over how Hail managed to assassinate someone in an extremely guarded country. To prove himself, Hail is given the task of blowing up a missile that is heading to North Korea with the potential to destroy half the world. He may do this however he wishes, however, he must have one member of the CIA with him. Enter Kara.
Kara, who is effectively the CIA’s courtesan, tries to use her skills to find out Hail’s secrets and report back to her boss. Naturally, Hail and his team are one step ahead and are monitoring all her phone calls. With a complicated relationship where both parties are pretending to trust each other, they must come together to successfully complete the mission before the CIA put their disastrous backup plan into place.

Although there are a handful of women in high positions, Operation: Hail Storm is more appropriate for the male population. With complicated mathematics and science, the story becomes similar to spy action novels, complete with an attractive woman: Kara. Physical description is reserved for Kara’s character, whose beauty is used to distract men, particularly villains.

Description is something the author, Brett Arquette, struggles with throughout the book. His choice of similes are questionable and may even upset some readers, for example, “It was like a blob of clay the size of a softball that had been worked by an angry mental patient wearing oven gloves.”

As well as scientific jargon, a number of foreign languages enter the narrative. Unfortunately, although it is possible to get the gist of what is being said, the actual phrases are never translated.

<i>Operation: Hail Storm</i> is a cleverly thought out novel with an impressive knowledge of science, drones and explosive devices. Whether these are wholly accurate is undetermined, however, there do not appear to be any discrepancies during throughout the narrative. As for the storyline, it is nothing spectacular or refreshing, instead, it is a typical male-oriented piece of sci-fi with a lot of blowing things up.
  
40x40

Hazel (1853 KP) rated Darkness in Books

Dec 17, 2018  
Darkness
Darkness
Victoria Sadler | 2016 | Dystopia
10
10.0 (2 Ratings)
Book Rating
<i>I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.</i>

“Violence always gets results.” But at what cost? Victoria Sadler’s dystopian novel <i>Darkness</i> explores and all too realistic scenario set in a not so distant future. The western world has fallen due to war and economic collapse. London has become a ghost city due to the death of thousands of people. Those not killed by bombs or deadly virus succumb to suicide or death by natural causes – if the cold and starvation can be labeled natural.

Laura Lewis is the sole survivor in her block of flats and now needs to make her way through the dangerous streets to St Paul’s Cathedral where what remains of the State will provide her with safety. However before she reaches her final destination she is ambushed by an army of women, a threat to the nation, known as RAZR – Resistance Against State Reformation. Jane, the leader of the resistance, believes she has saved Laura from a fate worse than death. But, as Laura discovers, RAZR may result in an even crueler future.

RAZR was born from a hatred of men, a guerilla feminist movement seizing the opportunity to obliterate the patriarchal society. Since the beginning of time men have oppressed women, regarding them as possessions with which they can do as they please. Despite the apparent equality achieved through past protests, the government, i.e. men, still control the lives of women. RAZR particularly focus on women’s rights to their own body, and are angry at the State’s current use for women: to procreate.

<i>Darkness</i> is full of radical violence, often ending in the mass death of male soldiers. With barely a break to take a breath, the narrative goes from one action scene to the next, heightening the excitement as the novel reaches its climax. As the reader learns more about RAZR and the State, opinions are constantly changed. Who is good, who is bad? Who can Laura trust? Then, to confuse things even more, Laura is not who she initially appears to be at all.

The amount of violence in this novel is disturbing, particularly as the majority of deaths are caused without guilty conscience. <i>Darkness</i> highlights the horrors of war and the wild nature of humanity. Without men and women being able to live in harmony there is no peace, on the other hand, complete equality is not possible. Furthermore, are RAZR feminists or terrorists? It is an obvious fact that the human race cannot survive with merely one gender of the species, so is RAZR doing more harm than good by fatally punishing all men?

Overall, <i>Darkness</i> poses more questions than it answers, yet it is such a griping novel. Women, particularly feminists will enjoy the powerful messages expressed by RAZR, but equally, readers will understand Laura’s hesitation. With so many plot twists to get your head around, you will never get bored of this story. With such an ambiguous ending, it is unclear whether <i>Darkness</i> will remain a standalone novel, or be continued with a sequel. Whatever the case, it will be interesting to read what the feminist, Victoria Sadler, comes up with next.
  
The Night Before
The Night Before
6
6.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Laura Lochner has returned to her hometown, a bit disgraced, after falling in love with the wrong man yet again. This is a pattern with Laura--always seeking the wrong guys. Her last breakup has hit her particularly hard, causing her to leave her job and apartment and return home to live with her sister, Rosie, Rosie's husband, Joe, and their young son, Mason. Rosie has worried about her sister since they were kids. Laura's always been a little angry and damaged. Both Rosie and Joe feel protective of Laura, especially as she leaves to go on a blind date with a man she "met" on a dating website. So when Laura isn't back the next morning and not responding to texts or calls, Rosie jumps to the worst conclusions. Rosie and Joe begin a frantic search to find Laura. Are they too late?

So this wasn't exactly what I was expecting, and I have to admit, it was a slightly strange and weird--almost trippy--read. The book alternates between Laura and Rosie's viewpoints, with Laura's leading up to and covering her blind date, while Rosie's cover the "after" period, when she searches for her sister. No matter what, I will emphasize that the book mainly held my interest, and while I didn't love it as much as many other reviewers, it was an interesting read, for sure. It's different, too, which is always fun and sometimes hard to find when it comes to thrillers. I just wasn't as "wowed" as I'd hoped, based on some of the reviews I'd read.

The premise here is that Laura has a horrible track record with men. And that she has a bit of a history with violence and unpredictability. The first part you will certainly get, as it's hammered over and over. And over. A bit too much for my taste. We get it. She has bad taste in men and makes poor choices. The second part--her unreliability and potential for violence--is a bit more intriguing. Instead of Rosie thinking that something might have happened to Laura, she almost fears Laura might have done something to her date. I liked this premise: it goes back to the fact that the book was different. A lot of this stemmed to Laura's past and a mysterious encounter with an old boyfriend, which was slowly revealed.


"It was in my hand. The weapon that killed him. But that night didn't change me. That night made me see what I've always been."


There are definitely some interesting twists in this one. Some, eh, while others were very unexpected. But, more in the far-fetched unexpected realm, versus whoa!, which led to a little bit of my letdown feeling. I wasn't particularly impressed with the big reveal of whodunnit and had no real attachment to any of the characters, including Laura, which was a bit disappointing.

Still, as I said, this one definitely held my interest, especially in the last 1/2 - 1/3 of the book. It's different and a little weird and dark. Some of the twists didn't really do it for me, but there are a ton of people who really liked this one, so take my review with a grain of salt. I'm still glad I read this book, and I will definitely continue to seek out Wendy Walker's books, as they are always a fun read. 3+ stars.
  
Judy &amp; Punch (2019)
Judy & Punch (2019)
2019 | Comedy, Crime, Drama
6
6.3 (3 Ratings)
Movie Rating
This had been low on my list of things to see at the film festival but several people recommended it to me so I decided to take a look.

In the town of Seaside, which is nowhere near the sea, Judy lives in something less than domestic bliss with Punch and their baby. Punch's shows are a hit and he's got dreams of grand things, but Judy is the real brains behind the outfit though he'd never admit it.

Judy leaves Punch in charge of the baby while she runs errands but despite the responsibility he gets drunk and an unforgivable accident occurs. In his effort to cover his tracks Punch puts his wife on a journey that leads her to a community in the woods where she can plan her revenge on him for his evil ways.

The film has a very heavy sense of fairy tale about it and certainly the setting wouldn't be out of place in almost any tale you could bring to mind. The location and buildings are perfect and yet somehow didn't seem quite right, this is very much an afterthought though, as I watched it I thought the depiction was good.

The parallels shown between the story of the couple's home life and the puppet show are clear throughout, my only worry is that you might not get a good understanding of that if you aren't aware of the traditional Punch and Judy shows. This wouldn't have been something I'd have thought about before but more and more I talk about things with people and the response is "I've never heard of that"... god I feel old.

Damon Herriman has taken off his Manson mask for this one and I found him to be a very good lead as Punch. He manages to capture the devious side of Punch, and honestly, anyone who can pull off the scene with the baby with a straight face deserves recognition... and yes, I do feel kind of bad for laughing.

Mia Wasikowska (who also starred in Blackbird, review coming soon) had two very different versions of Judy to play. Judy-1 gives us an outgoing and resilient woman, Judy-2.0 is angry and vengeful though there's a happiness in her once she gets to know the community who rescue her. This second incarnation wasn't entirely to my liking, I much preferred the earlier more lighthearted take on her. I can see why the change in her demeanour was fitting it didn't quite feel like a true transformation.

I enjoyed Judy & Punch, it was something different to watch which I always find to be an interesting experience but I'm not sure I'd need to see it again. I was entertained while I sat through it but apart from one scene there was nothing I see myself remembering further down the line.

Just a couple of honourable mentions: I enjoyed the music, the jazzed up classical pieces fit in nicely, and the dog wearing its own ruff? Adorable!

What you should do
I don't think you need to rush out and see this one but if you happen to come across it at some point it might be worth watching.

Movie thing you wish you could take home
It has to be an impish little dog wearing a ruff... because what else would a sensible person pick?!
  
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010)
2010 | Action, Comedy, Romance
Scott Pilgrim, played by Michael Cera, is a young man whose life is going nowhere fast. At 23, he describes himself as in between jobs and spends his free time playing bass in a struggling band. But Scott does have a girlfriend named Knives Chau (Ellen Wong), never mind that she is still in high school and things are about as chaste as they can get. Undaunted, Scott keeps plugging away despite the supportive taunts of his gay roomie Wallace (Kieran Culkin), and the members of his band.

Things change for Scott when he meets a girl named Ramona (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), at a party. Ramona shows no interest in Scott but he’s inexplicably drawn to her and eventually gets the roller blading delivery girl to go out with him, despite the strong protests of his sister Stacey (Anna Kendrick), and his drummer/ex-girlfriend Kim (Allison Pine). The upswing Scott’s life takes at meeting the girl of his dreams and his band’s shot at a recording deal is tempered by the complications of choosing between Knives, who is becoming more clingy, and Ramona, who brings with her a lot of angry baggage.

This baggage actually comes in the form of seven evil exes whom Scott must battle and defeat if he wishes to continue dating her. Scott accepts the challenge and finds himself in a life and death battle with some true psychos, all of whom have strange powers and appear out of nowhere to pummel Scott. I will not spoil the surprises but suffice it to say that the exes are played by some great names, and each one brings plenty of humor to go with the action.

Action and music blend well with comedy and romance and the video game-inspired fight sequences complete with numerous inside jokes for gamers are truly a delight. The frantic sequences mix music, and over the top action with cartoonish gags and humor in a winning formula. Seeing Scott take flying leaps across a room to battle for Ramona and rebounding from one pummeling after another is great fun. Scott give as good as he gets, learning at times that brains will win out over brawn.

The film has a frantic pacing that Director Edgar Wright never lets get out of control. Like his great work in Shaun of the Dead, Wright keeps the characters and their relationships at the center of the film, making them not only relatable but easy to root for despite the bizarre scenario the characters find themselves in.

The film is based on a graphic novel by Bryan Lee O’Malley and delivers a fun adventure that should delight fans of the novel as well as video gamers everywhere. The film knows who its audience is and plays the zany plot with a wink and smile and does not get caught up with intricate plotlines and overly complex characters. Instead the movie keeps the attention on the action and the great cast of characters. Cera does his best work yet in the title role and Culkin nearly steals every scene he is in as does Wong. Jason Schwartzman shines as the uber villain Gideon and rounds out the effective cast in this pleasant surprise of the summer.
  
The Irishman (2019)
The Irishman (2019)
2019 | Biography, Crime, Drama
Great but disappointing
Frank Sheeran starts in humble beginnings driving a meat truck while trying to make a living to support his family. He takes the favor of the right connect mobsters and quickly rises through the ranks to become one of its elite. He perpetrates countless villainous activities including murder, bribery, extortion and general unpleasantness toward his fellow man to the point where it almost becomes routine.

Enter Jimmy Hoffa.

Sheeran befriends the mighty Teamsters union boss and popular, yet controversial figure and the two form a lasting friendship. Sheeran sometimes operates as middle man between the hot-headed Hoffa and his mob contacts, always trying to unruffle feathers and keep the peace. Over many years, there are ups and downs even when Hoffa goes to prison, but their friendship endures.

Sheeran's life of excess has fractures his own family life; however, as his daughter becomes estranged after seeing just what her father is capable of. Their relationship is strained and may never recover. Sheeran's mob connections become more of a family for him as they are where his true loyalties lie.

Sheeran's role n the death of Hoffa has to be considered speculation as, to my knowledge, the perpetrator(s) have never been fully identified. This could be due to the source book by Charles Brandt "I Heard You Paint Houses" where Sheeran confesses. There is forensic evidence to back this up, so I guess it could be more definitive than I first suspected.

If you are comparing The Irishman to Goodfellas and/or Casino, you will be disappointed. Easily in 3rd place of the 3, I enjoyed while watching, but no sequence in particular really stood out. I can remember entire sections of both Goodfellas and Casino and here it seems like Scorsese has lost some of his creativity as far as cool camera shots, long pans or long takes in favor o just letting his fantastic cast have the spotlight. Not a bad idea if you have De Niro, Pacino and Pesci, but I still feel like the film lacked that extra "spark" making it truly great. The screenplay was adequate which is also surprising since Academy Award winning screenwriter Steven Zaillian is no stranger to an epic story, but, again, seems more by the numbers and not very standout.

The run time of almost 3 1/2 hours doesn't help as the film gets bogged down somewhat in the union infighting politics and I can see where that would bore much of the audience. There is a lot to enjoy about the film led by the stellar cast of course. De Niro, while always fantastic, doesn't really have the flashy part this time. Even Joe Pesci is understated compared to his characters in other Scorsese films. Pacino as the stubborn, bullish Hoffa is the standout in my opinion, but every time he gets angry and starts shouting I always think of his role as Big Boy Caprice in Dick Tracy (ok I'm a little weird).

I won't be surprised if the film gets lots of Oscars nods for acting, directing and technicals; however, I feel this is a case where it might be a hot property for a little while and then fade away quickly. We also still don't know if history might repeat itself and Oscar voters turn a cheek away from a Netflix film in favor of one with a more "traditional" distribution. Many believe the same happened in 2018 when critic favorite Roma lost to Green Book for the same reason.

We shall see...

  
Saving Ruby King
Saving Ruby King
Catherine Adel West | 2020 | Fiction & Poetry
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Ruby King is twenty-four-years-old when her mother, Alice, is found murdered in the home she shared with Ruby and Ruby's father, Lebanon. The police show little interest in--to them--another death in the King's black neighborhood, but Alice's death unhinges Ruby and leaves her alone with her violent, abusive father. Her only confidante is her best friend, Layla, who knows how long Alice and Ruby have suffered under Lebanon's wrath. But Layla is angry that Ruby won't do more to get away from Lebanon and she's even angrier at her father, a pastor, who has been close to Lebanon all these years, and yet never did anything to free Alice or Ruby from his abuse. Layla is determined to save Ruby, but as she works to rescue her friend, she starts to uncover a world of secrets and lies flowing back generations.


"I'm stitched together by the lies I tell myself and the lies people want to believe about me." ~Alice


I found this excellent and timely book to be incredibly well-written, with a power and tenderness to it that goes far behind your typical debut novel (I had to double check that this was actually West's first novel, I was so impressed).

West tells her story from a variety of points of view--Ruby; her late mother, Alice; her father, Lebanon; her best friend, Layla; Layla's father, a pastor; and more. We even hear from a central figure in all of these characters' lives--their church, via its omnipresent voice. The plot spans generations, with West giving a nuanced look at each of her complex characters. She does an amazing job of showing the power of family, for both good and bad. How choices can affect generations: one person's bad decisions can pass poison on, with children reliving dysfunction and sins.


"How can there be a me without her?" ~Ruby


No one is simply good or bad here, though Lebanon is not an easy-to-like man. Abused and neglected by his own parent, Sara, we see how Sara's neglect has turned Lebanon hard. But West is such a good writer that Lebanon is not a one-dimensional bad guy, as much as you want to hate him. I was incredibly impressed at how she could create sympathy for so many of her players, even when they did despicable things.


"Without Sara, who do I blame for...being me? Are children supposed to forgive their parents for the horrible things they've done?" ~Lebanon


This novel does an impressive job at delving into racism, domestic abuse, and sexual assault and trauma. The city of Chicago appears as its own character, springing to life via West's lovely prose. She expertly shows the difficulties black people face on the south side (and in general). I read this book during George Floyd's murder and found myself highlighting passages about police brutality that just hit me right in the gut. It's very powerful.

West's book features a variety of characters--they can be hard to keep track of at first, and I was glad to have the family tree in the beginning of the book. A few times the plot felt repetitious and the middle dragged a bit, but it picked up in the second half. There's a surprising amount of twists and turns. Overall, this is a realistic look at racism and domestic violence, but also friendship. It's quite well-written and layered with a twinge of hope throughout. I can't wait to see what West writes next. 4+ stars.