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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated The Princess and the Frog (2009) in Movies
Jul 4, 2021
ππ©π¦ ππ³πͺπ―π€π¦π΄π΄ π’π―π₯ π΅π©π¦ πππ°π¨. Offers wonderful animation and some really good voice work - but predictably so. As in... every chuckle or vividly crafted frame fits precisely in line with such a monotonous, hackneyed formula so not only are none of this film's assets particularly inspired or interesting, but they're all mostly forgotten as soon as that exhausting Ne-Yo song plays during the end credits. Not to mention knowing the exact beats this is going to take before it takes them makes it sadly *so* laborious to get through. Not that convention in these things is bad on its own, I mean these same directors made Moana which I enjoyed a ton despite its familiarity - but I found that one to be better than this one in every conceivable way: charm, storytelling, animation, etc. even if neither of them feel particularly well paced (the *only* thing this does better is that the lead is [[[slightly]]] more developed here). Doesn't help that the songs - I realize I'm in the minority to report - are only alright at best. Though admittedly that one's probably a me thing, since I've never really been a huge jazz guy. The cute little frogs are funny, and I loved the silly Jim Cummings firefly + wide-eyed Charlotte + lanky Keith David villain - but I'm sorry, at a certain point early on I just started waiting for this to be over.
LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Open Water (2003) in Movies
Sep 19, 2020
Admirable for what it had to work with, and I guess it gets points for being one of the most realistic shark movies out there - but why the hell did this terrify everyone back in the day lmfao. It amounts to a somehow pointedly slow 81 minutes (less after credits) of a couple bickering at sea while... like, occasionally seeing a jellyfish or maybe half a second of a shark from far away. This actually works better as an (intentional) comedy than a horror film, and the beginning of this feels like a weird ass porno, too - complete with millimeters away from couples full-frontal nudity in a dingy hotel room. The one thing this has going for it is that they're in *real* ocean water with *real* sharks, and on that front there are some real motherfucker shots in this that made me jump just on principle. There's also just some really terrific footage of various sea + land creatures in this that help add to the realism. When all is said and done I have to give props to that brutally hopeless coda though, Jesus Christ - made my skin crawl and actually made this whole product grow on me a lot more than my initial measure. But it fucks around too much and even though it does what it can decently well, it isn't enough. While I still think it's too unfair of a reaction, I can clearly see why everyone hates this now.
LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Pulse (2006) in Movies
Sep 20, 2020
Offensively awful, legitimately reprehensible filmmaking. I challenge anyone to find a worse American remake of Japanese horror than this. Not at all shocking how mercilessly they unceremoniously gutted the original of any sense of breadth, nuance, emotion, horror, intelligence, memorability, you know - all of that stuff that actually makes a half-decent horror film because apparently us dumb Yanks just couldn't handle any ounce of it... but by God did it have to look like moldy garbage too? This may be the worst looking film I've ever seen, whoever color-coded this to look like a chemical reaction between bleach and rotting flesh better have been blacklisted from working in the film industry since. I had to stop somewhere around the halfway point (which still felt like a goddamn century even though this barely touches 90 minutes with credits) because I felt physically ill from stomaching these shit visuals for that long. Of course it's ineptly acted, too. Is this what they thought the original meant? Some doltish technophobic lecture about how cell phones are as evil as murderous demons which also doesn't have a single milliliter of character to its name? The kind of stuff that could feasibly be used in torture chambers to get information out of people. So ironic that it kept the name, because it honestly doesn't have any pulse to speak of. Needed a trigger warning for pure stupidity.
Kirk Bage (1775 KP) rated Schindler's List (1993) in Movies
Jan 18, 2021 (Updated Feb 25, 2021)
The fourth in my series of films you would recommend to an alien to explain humanity dovetails nicely with my Hall of Fame inductee this week. It is Steven Spielbergβs seminal anti war epic Shindlerβs List (1993).
This one speaks for itself in many ways. As an exploration of evil and the men behind the atrocities committed during the late 30s and early 40s by Nazi Germany it is indispensable. The role played by Ralph Fiennes is especially brave and resonant in reminding us of how ego and power can corrupt beyond the point of anything recognisably human. But it is in the moments of resilience, defiance and sacrifice by the survivors that we fully appreciate the depths of the human spirit. A career defining performance by both Liam Neeson and Sir Ben Kingsley makes this a breathtaking and heartbreaking spectacle in every brutally emotional scene.
I will never forget seeing this in the cinema on its initial release and experiencing the absolute silence as the credits rolled and everyone left the screen and into the night with their thoughts and reflections, simply stunned by its impact. It demonstrates the very best and the very worst of human action and inaction in one perfect movie. Never an easy watch under any circumstances, but one worth dissecting and appreciating for all its genius β the directing, acting, cinematography, music, editing, everything is as near perfect as a film can be.
This one speaks for itself in many ways. As an exploration of evil and the men behind the atrocities committed during the late 30s and early 40s by Nazi Germany it is indispensable. The role played by Ralph Fiennes is especially brave and resonant in reminding us of how ego and power can corrupt beyond the point of anything recognisably human. But it is in the moments of resilience, defiance and sacrifice by the survivors that we fully appreciate the depths of the human spirit. A career defining performance by both Liam Neeson and Sir Ben Kingsley makes this a breathtaking and heartbreaking spectacle in every brutally emotional scene.
I will never forget seeing this in the cinema on its initial release and experiencing the absolute silence as the credits rolled and everyone left the screen and into the night with their thoughts and reflections, simply stunned by its impact. It demonstrates the very best and the very worst of human action and inaction in one perfect movie. Never an easy watch under any circumstances, but one worth dissecting and appreciating for all its genius β the directing, acting, cinematography, music, editing, everything is as near perfect as a film can be.
Russ Troutt (291 KP) rated Split (2016) in Movies
Jan 22, 2021
This is Russ. I went and saw the new M. Night Shyamalan movie Split today, and let me tell you...Hey, this is Stephen. I'm in the light now. So, we saw Split today. It's the best movie of 2017 I've seen. It's also the only movie of 2017 I've seen so far. Sit down Stephen! This is Arnie, and yeah, Split was amazing! It was as thrilling as climbing a water tower. Damn it Arnie, sit back down! Don't make me release the beast! Sorry about that, this is Russ again, back in the light. Split is one of M. Night Shyamalan's best movies to date. There have been movies about people with split personalites in the past, but this is definitely one of the most original takes on the subject matter. This is happening, you don't need a sixth sense to see it, just follow the signs, leave your village, and take a visit to your local theater and see this movie. James McAvoy gives a great performance, or performances I should say, and the 'survivor girl' Anya Taylor-Joy is unbreakable. A solid thriller that deserves to be in the light right now. Oh, and make sure you don't leave the theater before the credits roll, because the last scene ties the movie into another of Shyamalan's. I won't say which, but I was grinning ear to ear with the tie-in.
Rickey A. Mossow Jr. (689 KP) rated Dumbo (2019) in Movies
Aug 27, 2019
Another unnecessary remake of a childhood classic.
When I originally saw the trailer for this pop up on YouTube, my heart swelled with happiness and the child in me grinned from ear to ear. So many memories came back and flooded my heart and mind. Then, I actually watched this movie. It struggled for me from the beginning as it was instantly clear the star wasn't the elephant with big ears, but rather a typecast Danny Devito, Collin Farrell with a terrible southern accent, his women empowerment staple daughter, and his son that is just kinda there. The anthropomorphism of the animated film is gone, and without it, the key scenes lifted from the original don't carry the emotional weight they did. Much of the story makes little to no sense, including the climax and tie everything up in a neat bow ending. All the PC nonsense and making a statement about current social and political issues isn't needed. It's a kids movie. Once it was clear that this was Disney making a movie about evil corporations buying up small entities to make a monopoly, I checked out mentally from the obvious irony. As the credits rolled, I was just left with an empty feeling, my swollen heart shrunk and my grin gone. Memories from my childhood had been stamped out by Disney Inc. in search of the almighty dollar with yet another unnecessary and bad remake.
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