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Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight (2020)
Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight (2020)
2020 | Horror
3
5.6 (5 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Condemnable for the dubbing alone
Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight is a Polish horror film about a group of technology dependent youths visiting an offline summer camp who are terrorised by a danger lurking in the woods.

The film follows a small group centred around Zosia (Julia Wieniawa), as they head out from the camp on a 3 day trek into the woods and encounter some very unfriendly locals. I’m afraid that from the very start, there’s nothing about this film that is particularly original. Pretty much every classic slasher horror is noticeably referenced here, from Friday the 13th to The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and everything in between. It even drifts into sci-fi at one point. Some might say this is a homage to these films, but for me it was just a blatant copy. From the hillbilly bad guys in wooden cabins to the use of a machete, it all just felt so unoriginal. There was nothing at all in this that didn’t remind me of another, much better film. And that’s not even taking into account all of the clichéd horror movie tropes that are thrown in throughout - I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve seen dismembered deer/wildlife and phone batteries that are conveniently dying to name but a few, and Nobody Sleeps in the Woods tonight can’t seem to avoid these.

Despite this, there are some (very few) positives. The score is surprisingly atmospheric and dramatic, and works so well to build some much needed tension. The practical special effects, at least in the death scenes, are also good and there’s a pretty decent amount of gore. However this is pretty much the only good things I can say about this film. Whilst the death effects might be good, the creature/enemy effects are severely lacking and they look very cheap and second rate. It doesn’t help that their characters are rather silly and have no real purpose other than to kill. And even their murdering appears to be nonsensical and sporadic – for instance in one scene killing a character who’s outside yet completely ignoring those in tents a mere metres away. The youths don’t fare any better when it comes to characterisation either. They are your usual slasher movie group and aside from Zosia none have any real depth or back story, and for the most part they don’t live enough for you to care anyway.

But even considering all of the above, by far the worst crime of this film is the fact that it’s dubbed. Dubbing is one of my personal pet peeves. I cannot abide watching anything where the sound doesn’t sync with actors mouths moving, especially when the dubbing isn’t intended as tongue in cheek. And worse still, Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight features the most cringeworthy dubbing I’ve ever heard, with some very stereotypical American voiceovers that are made worse by the cheesy script that tries to shoehorn in as many geeky pop cultures references that it can find. Within 10 minutes I’d had enough and I do wonder if this film could’ve been much more bearable has it just been subtitled instead.

Dubbing aside, this film is still pretty poor and riddled with so many clichés that you can barely discern any truly original ideas. If you want to watch a horror film like this, you’d be better off watching the classic originals.
  
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LeftSideCut (3778 KP) Nov 15, 2020

I paused this and set it to Polish language with subtitles within about two minutes into the film. I hate dubbing anyway but it was particularly awful, and so much better once I changed it

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Sarah (7798 KP) Nov 16, 2020

You know i didn't even think of doing that 😕 would've been a much better idea!

To Kill a Kingdom
To Kill a Kingdom
Alexandra Christo | 2018 | Romance, Young Adult (YA)
8
7.9 (17 Ratings)
Book Rating
Scrappy siren
This is a thrilling debut from Alexandra Christo, taking a unique perspective on The Little Mermaid. It’s rather rudimentary to compare TO KILL A KINGDOM to The Little Mermaid because apart from some basics on characterisation, there really is little similarity.

Firstly, in a sea of YA fantasy series, I want to shout from the rooftops that this is a full and rounded standalone. Yes, I said standalone and I felt complete by the end, so it does what it says on the tin.

Sirens are the name of the game in this book and Lira is a scrappy, fierce and murderous siren princess known across the world as The Princes Bane. Her mother, the Sea Queen is her nemesis but she is bent to her mother’s will. The Sea Queen is a rather frightening, violent dictator without ethics or scruples. Lira, initially with little to recommend her, undertakes a change about which I don’t want to say more. The character development was superb.

“The crew said her hair was as red as hellfire.”

“The Princes’ Bane is the greatest monster I’ve ever known, and the only one who’s escaped death once I’ve set my sights on her."

Elian is more pirate than Prince of Midas, on a self-inflicted crusade to rid the world of sirens. There’s a lot more to like about Elian and he cuts a swarthy, heroic figure. The ship the prince operates from, holds a crew of friends, protectors and loyal sailors, they made for good reading. When Elian and Lira eventually cross paths, it’s not pretty but it’s explosive, violent and hateful.

“It’s you.”
“Look at you. My monster, come to find me.”

The story took hold of me from the first chapter and was a thrilling voyage across oceans and into unusual lands. I was interested throughout and dying to see what would happen. The romance is subtle but still kicks a punch, nevertheless, it doesn’t overwhelm the story.


"Me, my ship, and a girl with oceans in her eyes."

I had a little niggle in this book regarding how the dialogue was written, my problem being that it is consistently unclear when the dialogue character changes, which stops your flow while you work out who’s talking. However, this is just a niggle and wasn’t a major issue.

I am truly excited about this debut, it’s uniqueness and strong writing of characters and story direction. YA fantasy lovers are going to rave over this, I’m sure.

I voluntarily read an early copy of this book.
  
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Lee (2222 KP) rated Happy Death Day 2U (2019) in Movies

Feb 18, 2019 (Updated Feb 21, 2019)  
Happy Death Day 2U (2019)
Happy Death Day 2U (2019)
2019 | Horror, Mystery
A worthy sequel
Contains spoilers, click to show
The original Happy Death Day was a real pleasant surprise. A cross between Groundhog Day and Scream, with our heroine being killed by a baby face mask wearing killer every day, only to wake up again at the start of the same day. With a long list of potential suspects, and slowly feeling the effects of dying repeatedly, she set about trying to find the killers identity. Much of what made the first movie so enjoyable was largely down to lead character Tree, played by Jessica Rothe and the intensely hilarious way that she approached the whole situation. It wasn't exactly a horror movie, more of a comedy thriller.

In Happy Death Day 2U, we begin by following Ryan. Ryan was also in the first movie, bursting into his campus room each morning, interrupting roommate Carter and Tree after she'd spent the night there. As he makes his way to the room from the car he'd spent the night in - avoiding a barking dog, dodging a man asking for money and a boy riding a skateboard - it's pretty clear that we're setting up a series of events likely to be repeated time and again in a similar way that Tree experienced a very specific series of events each day in the first movie. During his morning at university, we discover that Ryan has been working on a Quantum mechanics experiment along with a bunch of nerdy students - a machine dubbed 'Sissy'. Turns out Sissy has been causing some very high power fluctuations and generated some very high readings the day before, the day in which Tree experienced her loop. Soon after, Ryan is killed by the baby face killer and wakes up in his car once again, experiencing the same events we've just seen encounter on the way to his room. When he explains what just happened to Tree and Carter, Tree sets about trying to help him figure out how Sissy caused the time-loop in the first place, and how it has now transferred to Ryan.

At this point you'd think you've got the rest of the movie pretty much figured out - with Ryan repeating his day, aided by experienced looper Tree. But surprisingly, the movie largely abandons its slasher story-line. Instead, we get a more sc-fi story with a varied mix of slapstick comedy and emotional drama. An accident involving Sissy opens up a portal to the multiverse and Tree finds herself caught up in her original loop once more. Only this time, it's in a slightly different universe to the one she's used to - her mum is now alive, and her boyfriend is dating her best friend. Not only does she need to work with Ryan and his nerd friends each day in order to determine how to put things right, she needs to once again work out who the killer is in this particular universe and, more importantly, make the difficult decision to either stay in the universe where her mum is still alive, or return to the one she knows and has lived in all her life.

Once again, Jessica Rothe as Tree is what makes this movie so enjoyable. From the emotional scenes with her mum, to the frustration of the loop, to the bad ass fighting back against it all, she pulls it all off wonderfully. We even get time to enjoy some very funny death scenes too - a particularly enjoyable one being a sky-dive out of an aeroplane, wearing only a bikini and then landing horizontally in slow motion while giving the finger to the camera!

It's difficult for me to say whether or not I enjoyed this movie more or less than the first. A lot of what made the original so enjoyable is present in this sequel. But there are also a lot of new elements introduced, some that work and some that don't. Overall I had a great time watching with this though - definitely a worthy sequel.
  
Show all 4 comments.
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Dean (6925 KP) Feb 21, 2019

Doesn't show her Mum in the trailer

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Lee (2222 KP) Feb 21, 2019

Not really a spoiler as such but take your point onboard. Have marked it as a spoiler just in case anyone else thinks it is

Every Fifteen Minutes
Every Fifteen Minutes
Lisa Scottoline | 2015 | Fiction & Poetry
4
8.0 (4 Ratings)
Book Rating
Dr. Eric Parrish is a busy psychiatrist juggling his work as Chief at a hospital unit, as well as his own private practice. He is also reeling from his recent separation from his wife and the subsequent time he must spend away from his daughter, Hannah, who is only seven-years-old. One day, Eric is called to treat an elderly woman who is dying from cancer, but it quickly becomes clear the real patient is her grandson Max, who, at 17, is having difficulty dealing with his grandmother's impending death. Eric quickly discovers that Max is depressed, struggling with OCD, and having violent thoughts about a girl he knows from his job. However, as Eric treats Max, he suddenly finds his own life breaking apart around him. There is a murder, a violent incident, problems with his wife and daughter, issues at work, and much more.

I never really got "into" this book. To me, Eric is not a likeable character. Throughout the course of the novel he seems to make a remarkable number of questionable decisions, even if his life is somewhat spiraling out of control. For instance, as he goes through the divorce with Caitlin, Eric is constantly lamenting about Hannah and the effects of the divorce on her. So much so that he comes by the house unasked, calls his wife and daughter at all hours, completely ignores the advice of his lawyer, etc. He seems to lack knowledge of any basic divorce or legal protocol - not to mention common sense.

The lack of common sense prevails throughout the book. So much of the plot is supposedly driven by what Eric knows about Max, this teenage kid he meets at the hospital, but really they have two sessions together before things go awry. It seems insane that he would have learned so much about his patient in this time. So much of the plot just seemed implausible and annoying. We hear constant talk about Eric's past anxiety and how he overcame it. OK - so what?

Overall, I just found myself irritated by Eric and annoyed by his decisions. Parts of the book seem completely improbable and the plot is so thinly constructed that once you figure out how everything comes together, it seems barely possible. Then Scottoline throws in another twist that seems completely unnecessary. Overall, rather disappointing read.
  
She Dies Tomorrow (2020)
She Dies Tomorrow (2020)
2020 | Comedy, Drama, Sci-Fi
2
4.5 (2 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Pretentious waste of time
On paper, the concept behind She Dies Tomorrow is an intriguing one – “Amy thinks she’s dying tomorrow…and it’s contagious..”. And the trailer provided just enough mystery to make me want to seek it out too. Is it a portrayal of paranoia and anxiety, or is there something more sinister or supernatural at work, that they carefully and cleverly avoided showing us in the trailer?

We join Amy, already convinced that she is going to die tomorrow. She wanders aimlessly around her flat at night, drinking wine. Lying on the wooden floor, she traces her finger along the wood veins in the floorboards and presses herself against the wall, as if she is at one with the world and her surroundings. She also repeatedly drops the needle on a score by Mozart – a piece of music that I do not initially dislike, but come to loathe by the end of the movie.

Her close friend Jane pays a visit, but is dismissive of Amy and her insistence that tomorrow she will die. However, after Jane returns home to continue working, a sudden realisation crosses her face, and she also then has the feeling that she will die tomorrow. When Jane later joins a small party at her brother’s house, a similar pattern occurs, with everyone thinking she’s gone crazy. But eventually, they all start to think the same, with each realisation accompanied by a strange neon purple light flashing across their faces. It certainly does seem to be contagious…

The remainder of the movie deals with each character coming to terms with their impending death and passing the feeling onto a few other people. We see Amy trying to make the most of her remaining time, and we also flip back a few days to learn a bit more about her in the run up to today.

As I mentioned earlier – on paper, there’s definitely a great idea at the heart of She Dies Tomorrow, and reading back through my review certainly confirms that. Unfortunately though, nothing about this movie worked for me at all. I found the acting terrible, and was unable to connect with any of the characters. It’s less than 90 minutes long, but is such a dull, pretentious and badly written slow-burn that all mystery and intrigue generated by that trailer quickly vanishes. For a movie that wants you to ponder on your remaining time on this earth, it certainly does a pretty good job of wasting it. Oh and if you’re expecting some kind of explanation and ending that might help redeem the painful build-up, you’re going to be seriously disappointed.
  
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Daniel Boyd (1066 KP) rated The Sisters Brothers (2018) in Movies

Jan 7, 2019 (Updated Jan 7, 2019)  
The Sisters Brothers (2018)
The Sisters Brothers (2018)
2018 | Drama, Western
Cast all give brilliant performances (1 more)
Quirky filming techniques
He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother
I was dying to see this movie as soon as I saw the first trailer for it, but even though it dropped in the states months ago, it's not coming to UK cinemas until April 2019! However, if you mess around with the location settings on your on-demand website of choice, it is possible to legally watch this movie in Britain without having to wait another 4 months for it to release.

We seem to be at a point cinematically where traditional westerns that follow a gunslinger duelling his way across the west have all been done to death. Instead, it seems like modern westerns have to take a different, more unorthodox approach to the stories that they decide to tell. Take The Hateful Eight for example, as much as I loved that film, it was closer to the Clue movie than it was any of Sergio Leonne's Spaghetti Westerns. Or there is the very recent Ballad Of Buster Scruggs, which I personally enjoyed, but even within that movie, the tone and feel varied wildly throughout and none of it was what I would call a traditional western.

The Sisters Brothers follows this trajectory of oddity. It follows the titular brothers (played by John C. Reilly and Joaquin Pheonix,) who are essentially hitmen working for a Commodore (played by Rutger Hauer,) who have been sent to kill a chemist/gold prospector (played by Riz Ahmed,) with the help of a scout also working for the commodore, (played by Jake Gyllenhall.)

This movie is strange. It was directed by Jacques Audiard and there is a strange tone to the whole thing which feels distinctly French. There are an abundance of odd yet aesthetically pleasing shots that contribute to the film's odd tone and there are some comedic elements thrown in also. The whole thing is a mixing pot of different elements, yet it all strangely works.

Overall, I enjoyed The Sisters Brothers even if it was unconventional and not exactly the movie that I had expected going in and the performances all around are sublime.