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Dianne Robbins (1738 KP) rated Amityville: The Awakening (2017) in Movies

Jan 27, 2019

Amityville: The Awakening (2017)

2017 | Horror, Mystery

5.0

(5 Ratings)

Movie Rating

Not much (2 more)

Stays within the Amityville realm

Shows footage from DeFeo's crimes and mentions the Amityville history/"haunting"

Slow and drags on (8 more)

Boring

Tense in a teen angst way

Poor character relationships

One-dimensional characters

Vague plotlines

Visually too dark to see most action

Unoriginal

Flat acting

Drags on and on and on and blah.

If you expect a family to move into the Amityville house where DeFeo murdered his family in the 1970s and be haunted or possessed by a ghost, demon, poltergeist, etc., you are 100% correct. That premise could be interesting but unfortunately, this film falls short. It is tense because of the relationships between the characters and not from suspense. It's pretty boring and relies on a few jump scares and flashes of horror. The storyline is unoriginal and poorly done. The lighting is so dark that it's difficult to see the last 30 minutes of the action. You might as well be listening to an old-fashioned radio show or horror podcast instead. This movie is problematic from beginning to end. There are much better films out there with a similar premise so unless you're extremely bored and like to torture yourself, avoid this one.

Kudos

Madmen and Badmen: What Happened When British Politics Met Advertising

Sam Delaney

(0 Ratings) Rate It

Book

How did a bunch of unelected, unaccountable admen end up running British politics? Sam Delaney...

LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated The Grudge (2020) in Movies

Sep 21, 2020

The Grudge (2020)

2020 | Horror

4.4

(8 Ratings)

Movie Rating Watch

Thankfully doesn't skimp out on the gore (some real solicitously nasty, gushy butchery on display - it's far and away the star of the show) but misses out on nearly everything else that made this concept so watchable. A bunch of people sitting around and sulking about stupid bullshit the entire time, who gives a rat's ass? Doesn't help that the demon design is pure crap and not a single actor - save for the always superlative Lin Shaye (who is seriously one of the best new horror actors in the game right now) - even wants to be here to begin with; and it shows in these fucking intolerably drab performances. The structure is actually kind of neat, though it peddles all but nothing. In fact the whole product has a clever method of execution but shits the bed on actually doing anything with it. Also its unintentionally funny in the worst possible way, these tropes are so tired (blink and you miss them predictable jump 'scares', dumbass characters, competent but uninspired visuals, morose and generic police procedural elements being poorly mixed into a much more interesting horror story, etc.) beyond belief. Barely 93 minutes and feels like forever, has okay moments but *not* worth the sit.

Kudos

LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Phantoms (1998) in Movies

Sep 21, 2020

Phantoms (1998)

1998 | Horror, Mystery

4.8

(10 Ratings)

Movie Rating Watch

Peter O'Toole was the bomb in 𝘗𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘰𝘮𝘴, yo. Features elements of a horror movie but fails to actually make a horror movie out of them - spends most of its runtime focusing on the bracing thrills of walking around slowly and looking at stuff, and the heart-clenching horrors of sitting in some lab talking about chemicals and stuff. Dean Koontz is the Dan Brown of horror, ineptly weaving together such laughably idiotic historical appeals (forced to be played straight) for people who don't know they aren't cultured and then doing nothing with them. Also Rose McGowan is either genuinely crap here or she just doesn't care. The sci-fi violence/gore is honestly quite vicious and damn cool for what this is, and there is a noticeable amount of enjoyable stupidity to be had (terrified Affleck pleading for his life to a golden retriever, O'Toole screaming about how some ancient extraterrestrial-demon shapeshifting oil killed the dinosaurs, etc) but it's too slapdash for its own good. Gets right into it then takes multiple breaks to sit on its ass, not awful but also not worth any sort of time, tbh. The Blob for those thirsty for cardboard vapidity. *Please* just watch 𝘝𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 7𝘵𝘩 𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘵 instead.

Kudos

Awix (3310 KP) rated Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth (1992) in Movies

May 27, 2020 (Updated Aug 2, 2020)

Second Hellraiser sequel and the first no-two-ways-about-it lousy one. Chief bondage demon Pinhead has been stripped of the limitations constraining his unpleasant recreational activities, which he likes, but also turned into a piece of interior decoration, which he doesn't. He endeavours to get himself released while a plucky young journalist tries to figure out why people keep turning up skinned or lacerated by flying chains.

A Hellraiser movie made with an American sensibility and for a mainstream American audience - one almost gets the sense the writers think they're making a Nightmare on Elm Street movie. The first half, with Pinhead stuck in a pillar, is not too bad, but they have to let him out eventually at which point the film's IQ and sense of restraint both vanish. Too much lazy gore and silly action (rubbish Cenobites wandering around New York City fighting the police). Doug Bradley just about saves the movie from being completely worthless, as he manages to chew the scenery even while being part of it; Terry Farrell was better in Star Trek. The occasional interesting idea or image but the film's main achievement is making the first two look better than they actually are.