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Gods Of Egypt (2016)
Gods Of Egypt (2016)
2016 | Action, Sci-Fi
3
5.5 (15 Ratings)
Movie Rating
God Awful
Those of you who keep up to date with the goings on in the film world may be thinking Gods of Egypt was released way back in February; and you’d be right for thinking that.

The film, directed by Alex Proyas (I, Robot, Knowing) performed so poorly in America at the start of the year that its UK release was scrapped, until now. But is the resulting film as bad as its figures would suggest? Or are we looking at a future cult classic?

Good god no. From shocking dialogue to laughable special effects; Gods of Egypt is a dreadful dirge of a movie with practically no saving graces. It’s just that bad.

The survival of mankind hangs in the balance when Set (Gerard Butler), the merciless god of darkness, usurps Egypt’s throne and plunges the empire into chaos. Hoping to save the world and rescue his true love, a defiant mortal named Bek (Brenton Thwaites) forms an alliance with the powerful god Horus (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) to stop Set before he destroys everything.

Thankfully, the plot itself isn’t too bad and has a vaguely interesting premise. The problem is how it is executed. Alex Proyas takes our protagonists on a rollercoaster ride of bland set pieces, populated by cardboard enemies and special effects that manage to look expensive and awful at the same time.

Gold, blood red, sparkling granite and deep, rich blacks all combine for a nauseating colour palate, only worsened by the cinematography. No shot is lingered on for any great amount of time – it’s like Alex Proyas was too terrified of allowing his audience to see the mess up close, shifting from frame to frame every few seconds.

Elsewhere, the acting is fairly inconsistent. Gerard Butler yet again channels his character from 300, while newcomer Brenton Thwaites looks po-faced as he spouts complete and utter drivel, a departure from his promising turn in 2013’s The Giver. The painful attempts at comedy fall flat on every single occasion and ensure no cast member leaves with their dignity intact.

2016 has thrown up some pretty bad films. London Has Fallen, Through the Looking Glass and Zoolander 2 spring immediately to mind, but this manages to outdo them by a country mile.

Overall, Gods of Egypt leaves you with more questions than it answers. Why is the Egyptian god of darkness Scottish? Why is it over two hours long? What on earth was Summit Entertainment thinking pouring $140million into this thing?

There is some good news at the end of this rather murky rainbow however. Your question as to whether you should go and see it may well be the only question that can be answered.

https://moviemetropolis.net/2016/06/18/god-awful-gods-of-egypt-review/
  
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Death on the Nile (2022)
Death on the Nile (2022)
2022 | Mystery
Well Done
The old adage “they don’t make movies like this anymore” is no truer than when one is speaking about large budget, big name cast murder mysteries and with what must surely be a disappointing box office for DEATH ON THE NILE, they just might not try again.

And that is too bad for the latest Kenneth Branagh Hercule Poirot mystery DEATH ON THE NILE with Branagh starring, again, as the great Agatha Christie Belgian Detective is the stuff that makes going to movies fun - big characters, major stars, gorgeous scenery and a plot that will keep one guessing until the end.

Branagh’s previous work as Director and star of MURDER OF THE ORIENT EXPRESS was a bit of a disappointment as it was gorgeous and well cast - but the pacing of the film dragged and Branagh decided, inexplicably, to add an action scene to a drawing room mystery.

In DEATH ON THE NILE, Branagh (who Directed this film from an screenplay by Michael Green who adapted the Agatha Christie novel), corrected these mistakes and the film moves along spritely with the actors chewing the scenery - but quickly - making this a very enjoyable movie-going experience.

Branagh, in his second go-around as Poirot, seems much more relaxed and comfortable with his character. This is, perhaps, because they add a backstory to Poirot, so he has much more to set his character upon. On the surface, purists of the the Agatha Christie character will blanche at the thought of adding a backstory, but I’ll be darned if it doesn’t work and adds a layer of depth to the character and the film that I wasn’t expecting.

The All-Star cast knows what type of film they are in - and what is expected of them - and they deliver. Gal Gadot, Armie Hammmer, Rose Leslie, Letitia Wright, Jennifer Saunders, Sophie Okonedo and, surprisingly, Russell Brand all shine brightly in their “moment” that their character gets with Poirot. Special notice needs to be made of Annette Bening’s performance. It was GREAT to see this wonderful actress get a role she could sink her teeth into.

As always, with this type of film, the settings and costumes take a prominent position and they do not disappoint. Cinematographer Haris Zambarloukos should be hired by the Egyptian Chamber of Commerce for he lovingly shows the sites along the Nile River (circa ‘1930’s) in a beautiful poetic way while the Costumes by Pago Delgado are gorgeous and ornate - without being over-the-top.

If you get a chance to see DEATH ON THE NILE on the big screen, do so, you will be well rewarded for your efforts - and just might help get another of these big budget, big star mysteries made. If not, make sure to check this film out when it starts streaming near you - it’s a ton of fun.

Letter Grade: A-

8 stars (out of 10) and you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis)