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graveyardgremlin (7194 KP) rated Sweet Valley Confidential: Ten Years Later in Books
Feb 15, 2019
<b><i>"What a stupid book."</i></b>
That was my initial thought after turning the final page of <b>Sweet Valley Confidential: Ten Years Later</b>.
As a pre-teen, I was addicted to the <u>Sweet Valley High</u> series, and then later, the <u>Sweet Valley University</u> series as well. Before that even, I had read some of the Twins and Kids series, so when I heard this was coming out last year, I just knew I had to read it. I was excited beyond compare and went into full geek-out mode. Where are the perfect size-six Wakefield twins, and their friends and enemies, now? What are their occupations? Who are they dating or who'd they marry? And my questions kept going on and on. What has inspired this obsession? It's not like these books were high literature, but somehow they became ingrained into my life to this very day and I cannot help but remember SVH fondly.
It is nearly impossible to review the story within the covers without spoilers, but I am going to try my darnedest. Some cursing may or may not be involved.
<b>Short synopsis</b> (snarky comments in parentheses ;P):
Jessica has betrayed Elizabeth. <i>(Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what she did. Anyone who's read the books could make an accurate guess.)</i> The Ultimate Betrayal. <i>(Oooooh!)</i> Elizabeth flees to New York. Elizabeth is a slightly sympathetic bitter victim/martyr who craves revenge throughout the book. Jessica is supposed to be a sympathetic betrayer/victim who's heartsick at destroying her sister. <i>(I don't buy it.)</i> Tons of reminiscing flashbacks ensue throughout the book, sometimes the same ones told by different characters, and take up about half of it, so there's barely any plot. Book ends with a thirteen-page <i>Where Are They Now?</i>-type epilogue that tells old fans what has happened to many major supporting characters from the original high school series. <i>(Apparently no one is allowed to be happy. And anyone you may have originally liked from SVH has turned into a big dick. WTF?)</i>
I expected to enjoy this as the usual over-the-top, soap opera stories I remember, but revamped a bit. Sadly, I was left feeling underwhelmed, disappointed, annoyed, and rather pissed off. For one thing, I could not buy the main betrayal -- <spoiler>Jessica and Todd?! In love!!?? Really? In what surreal dimension does that make any kind of sense? This broke the book for me. How can I believe anything else if this doesn't ring true. A passionate affair, sure. A one-night stand, why not? But actual 'til death do us part nonsense? Bull. Not when it's almost always been the Elizabeth and Todd, "made-for-each-other" type of thing. I actually wouldn't have minded if E & T hadn't ended up together, but for Todd to be with Jessica, that's just madness, plain and simple.</spoiler> -- it was just so unbelievable. And I mean that in a Sweet Valley way, which we all know is not steeped in any form of actual reality, so my standards are quite low and I expect the extraordinary and overwrought. So from this point on, which is within the first two chapters, I struggled, but somehow managed to read on. I admit, I gagged more than few times throughout the book. Who wouldn't when faced with passages such as this one,
<blockquote>"And what faces they were.
Gorgeous. Absolutely amazing. The kind you couldn't stop looking at. Their eyes were shades of aqua that danced in the light like shards of precious stones, oval and fringed with thick, light brown lashes long enough to cast a shadow on their cheeks. Their silky blond hair, the cascading kind, fell just below their shoulders. And to complete the perfection, their rosy lips looked as if they were penciled on. There wasn't a thing wrong with their figures, either. It was if billions of possibilities all fell together perfectly.
Twice."
-page 9/10</blockquote>
I hope you managed to hold onto your last meal. I barely did. I also had to endure "his beloved," "his love," and other similar nauseating descriptions.
This is not the PG-rated books from the past, the word "orgasm" is actually used. So is the F-bomb and other expletives. *gasp* Seriously, it does push the boundaries more than the innocent SVH series, but it's not very shocking by today's standards. Except that it does involve the Wakefield Twins, which was strange at first. Of course, current trends had to pop up, like Twitter and Facebook, Justin Timberlake and Beyonce, which always makes a book better and doesn't date it in the least. (That was heavy sarcasm in case you weren't sure.) The book does refer to some incidents and people from the SVU series, but only certain elements, otherwise it's mainly a continuation of high school and no one from the university days actually appears in the book.
Neither Elizabeth nor Jessica felt true to form, especially Jessica, and in fact, none of the characters, whether seen or just talked about, were right. Sure, some people change and some don't, but not a one was recognizable. Where did these strangers with the same names come from? Why couldn't there have been some semblance of the original shining through? Again, I have a hard time with the basis of the book, so that has severely colored my view of the entire thing, but as it stands, it was a complete waste of a good idea. I'd be willing to bet that any fan of SVH could come up with something a million times better than this dreck. Wasn't there an original ghostwriter available? You know, someone who might actually know the world and characters, and have the skill to develop them both in a believable manner?
The writing is rather clunky and purple-ly, often managing both at the same time. Redundancy abounds, editing mistakes, including wrong names and inconsistencies to previous events in SVH-iverse, and lots of use of the words "like" and "so", more-so in Jessica's narrative than anywhere else, which was really, really, so, like, irritating. Like, really. Ms. Pascal must have had a thesaurus at the ready, because there were big words awkwardly thrown into the narrative. While I appreciate authors utilizing lesser known or used words, some just don't blend well with the rest of the text and they pop-out unflatteringly. The structure needed fine-tuning and tenses were oddly used to differentiate the flashbacks from present day.
To put it succinctly, the writing isn't great and neither is the storyline, what there is of it. This was a bizarre read even by Sweet Valley standards and an insult to fans. Seriously, does Francine Pascal hate this universe and its readers? I think I'll stick to the <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/series/58723-sweet-valley-high">Sweet Valley High</a> series and make up my own stories about what happened afterward.
Slightly spoiler-ish lesson learned from this book:
<spoiler>Betrayal is okay as long as it's "Twu Luv."</spoiler>
Second lesson learned:
Everything always turns up fucking sunshine and roses and unicorns and lollipops for the worst person (or people) in the end.
I'd like to leave you with another winning description,
<blockquote>"There were no tears, but her mouth was twisted in a silent sob."
-page 17</blockquote>
<u>A thought a few hours after having finished this book:</u>
Maybe another "sequel" will eventually come out and it'll begin with Elizabeth waking up from the nightmare that is this book and we'll get the real ten years later story. Ahh, sweet dreams.
<u>Update: April 26, 2011:</u>
Oh yes, always good to blame the fans/readers for not liking their terrible book. By pointing out minor, petty reasons, I might add. <b>Warning:</b> book spoilers in article.
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/04/17/business/media/17sweet.html?_r=1
That was my initial thought after turning the final page of <b>Sweet Valley Confidential: Ten Years Later</b>.
As a pre-teen, I was addicted to the <u>Sweet Valley High</u> series, and then later, the <u>Sweet Valley University</u> series as well. Before that even, I had read some of the Twins and Kids series, so when I heard this was coming out last year, I just knew I had to read it. I was excited beyond compare and went into full geek-out mode. Where are the perfect size-six Wakefield twins, and their friends and enemies, now? What are their occupations? Who are they dating or who'd they marry? And my questions kept going on and on. What has inspired this obsession? It's not like these books were high literature, but somehow they became ingrained into my life to this very day and I cannot help but remember SVH fondly.
It is nearly impossible to review the story within the covers without spoilers, but I am going to try my darnedest. Some cursing may or may not be involved.
<b>Short synopsis</b> (snarky comments in parentheses ;P):
Jessica has betrayed Elizabeth. <i>(Doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what she did. Anyone who's read the books could make an accurate guess.)</i> The Ultimate Betrayal. <i>(Oooooh!)</i> Elizabeth flees to New York. Elizabeth is a slightly sympathetic bitter victim/martyr who craves revenge throughout the book. Jessica is supposed to be a sympathetic betrayer/victim who's heartsick at destroying her sister. <i>(I don't buy it.)</i> Tons of reminiscing flashbacks ensue throughout the book, sometimes the same ones told by different characters, and take up about half of it, so there's barely any plot. Book ends with a thirteen-page <i>Where Are They Now?</i>-type epilogue that tells old fans what has happened to many major supporting characters from the original high school series. <i>(Apparently no one is allowed to be happy. And anyone you may have originally liked from SVH has turned into a big dick. WTF?)</i>
I expected to enjoy this as the usual over-the-top, soap opera stories I remember, but revamped a bit. Sadly, I was left feeling underwhelmed, disappointed, annoyed, and rather pissed off. For one thing, I could not buy the main betrayal -- <spoiler>Jessica and Todd?! In love!!?? Really? In what surreal dimension does that make any kind of sense? This broke the book for me. How can I believe anything else if this doesn't ring true. A passionate affair, sure. A one-night stand, why not? But actual 'til death do us part nonsense? Bull. Not when it's almost always been the Elizabeth and Todd, "made-for-each-other" type of thing. I actually wouldn't have minded if E & T hadn't ended up together, but for Todd to be with Jessica, that's just madness, plain and simple.</spoiler> -- it was just so unbelievable. And I mean that in a Sweet Valley way, which we all know is not steeped in any form of actual reality, so my standards are quite low and I expect the extraordinary and overwrought. So from this point on, which is within the first two chapters, I struggled, but somehow managed to read on. I admit, I gagged more than few times throughout the book. Who wouldn't when faced with passages such as this one,
<blockquote>"And what faces they were.
Gorgeous. Absolutely amazing. The kind you couldn't stop looking at. Their eyes were shades of aqua that danced in the light like shards of precious stones, oval and fringed with thick, light brown lashes long enough to cast a shadow on their cheeks. Their silky blond hair, the cascading kind, fell just below their shoulders. And to complete the perfection, their rosy lips looked as if they were penciled on. There wasn't a thing wrong with their figures, either. It was if billions of possibilities all fell together perfectly.
Twice."
-page 9/10</blockquote>
I hope you managed to hold onto your last meal. I barely did. I also had to endure "his beloved," "his love," and other similar nauseating descriptions.
This is not the PG-rated books from the past, the word "orgasm" is actually used. So is the F-bomb and other expletives. *gasp* Seriously, it does push the boundaries more than the innocent SVH series, but it's not very shocking by today's standards. Except that it does involve the Wakefield Twins, which was strange at first. Of course, current trends had to pop up, like Twitter and Facebook, Justin Timberlake and Beyonce, which always makes a book better and doesn't date it in the least. (That was heavy sarcasm in case you weren't sure.) The book does refer to some incidents and people from the SVU series, but only certain elements, otherwise it's mainly a continuation of high school and no one from the university days actually appears in the book.
Neither Elizabeth nor Jessica felt true to form, especially Jessica, and in fact, none of the characters, whether seen or just talked about, were right. Sure, some people change and some don't, but not a one was recognizable. Where did these strangers with the same names come from? Why couldn't there have been some semblance of the original shining through? Again, I have a hard time with the basis of the book, so that has severely colored my view of the entire thing, but as it stands, it was a complete waste of a good idea. I'd be willing to bet that any fan of SVH could come up with something a million times better than this dreck. Wasn't there an original ghostwriter available? You know, someone who might actually know the world and characters, and have the skill to develop them both in a believable manner?
The writing is rather clunky and purple-ly, often managing both at the same time. Redundancy abounds, editing mistakes, including wrong names and inconsistencies to previous events in SVH-iverse, and lots of use of the words "like" and "so", more-so in Jessica's narrative than anywhere else, which was really, really, so, like, irritating. Like, really. Ms. Pascal must have had a thesaurus at the ready, because there were big words awkwardly thrown into the narrative. While I appreciate authors utilizing lesser known or used words, some just don't blend well with the rest of the text and they pop-out unflatteringly. The structure needed fine-tuning and tenses were oddly used to differentiate the flashbacks from present day.
To put it succinctly, the writing isn't great and neither is the storyline, what there is of it. This was a bizarre read even by Sweet Valley standards and an insult to fans. Seriously, does Francine Pascal hate this universe and its readers? I think I'll stick to the <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/series/58723-sweet-valley-high">Sweet Valley High</a> series and make up my own stories about what happened afterward.
Slightly spoiler-ish lesson learned from this book:
<spoiler>Betrayal is okay as long as it's "Twu Luv."</spoiler>
Second lesson learned:
Everything always turns up fucking sunshine and roses and unicorns and lollipops for the worst person (or people) in the end.
I'd like to leave you with another winning description,
<blockquote>"There were no tears, but her mouth was twisted in a silent sob."
-page 17</blockquote>
<u>A thought a few hours after having finished this book:</u>
Maybe another "sequel" will eventually come out and it'll begin with Elizabeth waking up from the nightmare that is this book and we'll get the real ten years later story. Ahh, sweet dreams.
<u>Update: April 26, 2011:</u>
Oh yes, always good to blame the fans/readers for not liking their terrible book. By pointing out minor, petty reasons, I might add. <b>Warning:</b> book spoilers in article.
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/04/17/business/media/17sweet.html?_r=1
Bethr1986 (305 KP) rated Bakeries and Buffoonery (Magical Mystery Book Club #4) in Books
Jul 2, 2023
Independent Reviewer for Archaeolibrarian - I Dig Good Books!
The snapdragon inn is the setting of a cozy mystery book club with a difference they get transported into the stories to find out whodunit!
This time they are trying to find out who hates cake so much, in the town of Frosting that they have caused chaos, mayhem, and murder. Can they do it before the next murder happens?
This is such a delightful series they really are a pleasure to read. Elizabeth does such an amazing job at pulling you into the story as if you are one of the characters and I must say I am rather fond of all the characters, I'm sad we've lost one but happy for her circumstances and hope we do find out how she gets on.
Although this is a series I personally think you could read it as a stand-alone, but it's much more fun reading the series as you get to find out more about everyone.
I highly recommend and give 5/5
** same worded review will appear elsewhere **
* A copy of this book was provided to me with no requirements for a review. I voluntarily read this book, and the comments here are my honest opinion. *
The snapdragon inn is the setting of a cozy mystery book club with a difference they get transported into the stories to find out whodunit!
This time they are trying to find out who hates cake so much, in the town of Frosting that they have caused chaos, mayhem, and murder. Can they do it before the next murder happens?
This is such a delightful series they really are a pleasure to read. Elizabeth does such an amazing job at pulling you into the story as if you are one of the characters and I must say I am rather fond of all the characters, I'm sad we've lost one but happy for her circumstances and hope we do find out how she gets on.
Although this is a series I personally think you could read it as a stand-alone, but it's much more fun reading the series as you get to find out more about everyone.
I highly recommend and give 5/5
** same worded review will appear elsewhere **
* A copy of this book was provided to me with no requirements for a review. I voluntarily read this book, and the comments here are my honest opinion. *
Deborah (162 KP) rated Remarkable Creatures in Books
Dec 21, 2018
I've only read one of Chevalier's previous novels and there I found her style to be extremely readable. The same is very much true of Remarkable Creatures - a title which can emcompass the fossils and the women, Mary Anning and Elizabeth Philpott, who find and are fascinated by them.
I suspect that most of us at one point or another have had some interest or curiousity about fossils. I admit that mine was ovbiously never a very indepth curiousity as I had never heard of any of the characters in the novel (with the obvious exception of the passing reference to Jane Austen of course!) but all the characters were real, historical figures as Chevalier explains at the end of the book.
Chevalier has evidently researched her fossils and her characters extensively for this novel, which I found impressive. The novel though it not at all dry! It was intriguing to see how the characters tried to reconcile the evidence of the fossils with that of conventional religious belief and how difficult it was for these two women to make any sort of recognised impact on the male-dominated scientific world.
I suspect that most of us at one point or another have had some interest or curiousity about fossils. I admit that mine was ovbiously never a very indepth curiousity as I had never heard of any of the characters in the novel (with the obvious exception of the passing reference to Jane Austen of course!) but all the characters were real, historical figures as Chevalier explains at the end of the book.
Chevalier has evidently researched her fossils and her characters extensively for this novel, which I found impressive. The novel though it not at all dry! It was intriguing to see how the characters tried to reconcile the evidence of the fossils with that of conventional religious belief and how difficult it was for these two women to make any sort of recognised impact on the male-dominated scientific world.
Merissa (14160 KP) rated Edge Jump in Books
Jul 7, 2018
Edge Jump by Elizabeth Noble
Edge Jump starts off with the death of Brett's sister, who is also Rylan's skating partner. The police are treating it as an attempted mugging. Brett wants answers, and hopes Rylan can provide at least some of them. When they meet up with each other again, neither of them wants to deny the attraction. Making their relationship work though, proves more difficult due to outside forces than either of them imagined.
I thoroughly enjoyed this story, and found it to be very well written. Rylan is new to 'the scene', but already knows what he wants. Brett is scared at the thought of having a 'forever' someone, but isn't able to stop moving forward with Rylan. The mystery side of it wasn't that mysterious, but I still enjoyed it. I couldn't quite understand the culmination of the mystery (without giving anything away) as I don't see how they could have got away with it, but nevermind.
With no editing or grammatical errors to disrupt my reading flow, this was a great M_M romance, and I would have no hesitation in recommending it.
* A copy of this book was provided to me with no requirements for a review. I voluntarily read this book, and the comments here are my honest opinion. *
Merissa
Archaeolibrarian - I Dig Good Books!
I thoroughly enjoyed this story, and found it to be very well written. Rylan is new to 'the scene', but already knows what he wants. Brett is scared at the thought of having a 'forever' someone, but isn't able to stop moving forward with Rylan. The mystery side of it wasn't that mysterious, but I still enjoyed it. I couldn't quite understand the culmination of the mystery (without giving anything away) as I don't see how they could have got away with it, but nevermind.
With no editing or grammatical errors to disrupt my reading flow, this was a great M_M romance, and I would have no hesitation in recommending it.
* A copy of this book was provided to me with no requirements for a review. I voluntarily read this book, and the comments here are my honest opinion. *
Merissa
Archaeolibrarian - I Dig Good Books!
The Private Lives of the Tudors: Uncovering the Secrets of Britain's Greatest Dynasty
Book
'Borman approaches her topic with huge enthusiasm and a keen eye for entertaining...this is a very...
Nicole Hadley (380 KP) rated Growing in God's Love: A Story Bible in Books
Jun 18, 2018
Growing in God's Love: A Story Bible by Elizabeth F. Caldwell; Carol A. Wehrheim is an illustrated book that pays attention to quality and detail. While it says it is a book that children can read, I believe it should be read to children. I am impressed with this book, the wording, and I like how it is designed to be interactive between adult and child with three simple questions at the end of each story.
Most of the stories are between one and two pages counting the illustrations and three questions and start at the beginning of the Bible in Genesis and through the old testament and then into the new testament. The verse location in the Bible is given under the story title.
The author did a great job of covering Bible topics in a way that children can understand but in a way that adults can gain a blessing as well.
I received an ARC from Westminster John Knox Press via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Most of the stories are between one and two pages counting the illustrations and three questions and start at the beginning of the Bible in Genesis and through the old testament and then into the new testament. The verse location in the Bible is given under the story title.
The author did a great job of covering Bible topics in a way that children can understand but in a way that adults can gain a blessing as well.
I received an ARC from Westminster John Knox Press via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Billy Bob Thornton recommended Giant (1956) in Movies (curated)
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The Beauty of the Wolf
8.0
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What some might call beauty, I find monstrous' In the age of the Faerie Queene, Elizabeth I, Lord...
Sophia (Bookwyrming Thoughts) (530 KP) rated Tempting Death in Books
Jan 23, 2020
I fully admit I signed up for the blog tour because of the way the synopsis is written it speaks to me! Of course I'm excited! Except there's a big problem: what if I don't like it? What if I hate it, or, or, want to throw it out the window because it was just that terrible?
Hint: I didn't throw it out the window. Holloway's debut novel is one you don't want to bypass simply. A girl nearly gets killed, gets saved and offered a job yet has 48 hours to choose. Add the fact a best friend is marked for murder and time is tick tocking (certainly not slowly) what more could you ask for? The idea oozes awesomeness all around.
BUT... there's just a few things. I feel that Holloway focused more on the plot and the action rather than the character building. I completely get that the fast pace might be an emphasis for how fast time is running out for Libbi. And as much as I just love Libbi Piper as a character and her personality, I don't feel as though I know her. Libbi and I are still strangers there's hardly anything about her past aside from a life of taking care of her brother when her mom is working in a hospital. Her dad just upped and left once upon a time. Well, at least until she was supposedly killed. But I'm quite sure Libbi has a much more interesting life than always taking care of her little brother even I have one (and my life is quite similar to Libbi's. Just lots of family drama.)!
Aside from all of that, there's barely anything else about Libbi, and she's the main character. You would expect more than a life of taking care of her brother and having a couple of besties since childhood I feel like I know Grimmy Aaron more now. I'm quite disappointed.
Second, the love triangle. It was extremely obvious the romance isn't going to go well (please, don't tell me the best friend never wins. I know that. That's beside the point.). If there's one thing that's obvious from day one, it's the fact Libbi is going to be no doubt jumping between two corners of the triangle so said corners wouldn't murder each other. LITERALLY.
(I personally predict that will be the near future of the Lux series.)
Despite the couple of problems, I loved Call Me Grim the building of the Grim Reaper world, Libbi's humor and making light of the entire situation even though it was likely she wouldn't get out of the situation "alive". Elizabeth Holloway is an author you'll want to watch out for in this particular genre.
-------------------
Advanced copy provided by Month9Books for the blog tour
Original Review posted at <a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2014/09/blog-tour-call-me-grim-by-elizabeth-holloway-arc-review-and-giveaway.html">Bookwyrming Thoughts</a>
<a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cG5gfBqJVzk/VA5BIojjZ9I/AAAAAAAAD1g/7srLUfpAGEU/s1600/banner.png"; /></a>
Hint: I didn't throw it out the window. Holloway's debut novel is one you don't want to bypass simply. A girl nearly gets killed, gets saved and offered a job yet has 48 hours to choose. Add the fact a best friend is marked for murder and time is tick tocking (certainly not slowly) what more could you ask for? The idea oozes awesomeness all around.
BUT... there's just a few things. I feel that Holloway focused more on the plot and the action rather than the character building. I completely get that the fast pace might be an emphasis for how fast time is running out for Libbi. And as much as I just love Libbi Piper as a character and her personality, I don't feel as though I know her. Libbi and I are still strangers there's hardly anything about her past aside from a life of taking care of her brother when her mom is working in a hospital. Her dad just upped and left once upon a time. Well, at least until she was supposedly killed. But I'm quite sure Libbi has a much more interesting life than always taking care of her little brother even I have one (and my life is quite similar to Libbi's. Just lots of family drama.)!
Aside from all of that, there's barely anything else about Libbi, and she's the main character. You would expect more than a life of taking care of her brother and having a couple of besties since childhood I feel like I know Grimmy Aaron more now. I'm quite disappointed.
Second, the love triangle. It was extremely obvious the romance isn't going to go well (please, don't tell me the best friend never wins. I know that. That's beside the point.). If there's one thing that's obvious from day one, it's the fact Libbi is going to be no doubt jumping between two corners of the triangle so said corners wouldn't murder each other. LITERALLY.
(I personally predict that will be the near future of the Lux series.)
Despite the couple of problems, I loved Call Me Grim the building of the Grim Reaper world, Libbi's humor and making light of the entire situation even though it was likely she wouldn't get out of the situation "alive". Elizabeth Holloway is an author you'll want to watch out for in this particular genre.
-------------------
Advanced copy provided by Month9Books for the blog tour
Original Review posted at <a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2014/09/blog-tour-call-me-grim-by-elizabeth-holloway-arc-review-and-giveaway.html">Bookwyrming Thoughts</a>
<a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cG5gfBqJVzk/VA5BIojjZ9I/AAAAAAAAD1g/7srLUfpAGEU/s1600/banner.png"; /></a>