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Brumpolarbears (22 KP) rated The Hobbit in Tabletop Games
Jun 18, 2019
Delving into Middle-Earth
As Middle Earth fever prepares to take hold once again with talk of a Lord of the Rings inspired TV show, I thought it might be time to take the adventures of Bilbo into the living room in the form of The Hobbit Board Game.
Gathering four of my best companions to join me on the adventure, we settled down for an evening of troll slaying and dragon fighting.
Based on the J.R.R Tolkien book as opposed to the film releases, The Hobbit is a game for 2-5 players which utilises a scorecard system rather than individual player pieces. The aim of the game, kill Smaug and find the treasure – simple enough surely?
When opening the box we were pleasantly surprised by the level of detail of the board as well as some rather beautifully illustrated dwarf cards. A lot of work had gone into these which is why we were a bit surprised by the Bilbo and Smaug figures which were plastic and painted red
Having laid out all of the pieces we then tackled the game instructions, which actually took as long as Bilbo’s journey to the Lonely Mountain. Having passed the instructions around we decided to just play the game and when we came to a segment we weren’t sure about, we would refer back. Despite the initial hiatus, The Hobbit is a rather enjoyable game, however not for unseasoned gamers.
The game is split into four adventures. Players must level up their initiative, cunning, and strength in order to battle goblins, fight wolves and escape elves before confronting Smaug himself. On the way, players will also collect gems which is ultimately the aim of the game as the player with the most is declared the winner at the end.
Each adventure comes with a series of adventure cards which break down into Gifts, Abilities and Travelcards. Gift cards present players with attribute benefits; Abilities assist players with battles; and Travelcards move Bilbo along his adventure. When encountering a battle, players must roll five dice in order to match certain conditions before moving on. Should the conditions not be met, players must draw a Dragon card, which incurs penalties and may result in Smaug moving across the board. Should Smaug reach Laketown, the game is over and the player with the most gems is declared the winner.
Having played the game with four other players we did actually have fun once we got into it and overcame the rather confusing rules. My best advice would be to have someone read the instructions before you and your friends sit down together as it can eat into the evening.
Gathering four of my best companions to join me on the adventure, we settled down for an evening of troll slaying and dragon fighting.
Based on the J.R.R Tolkien book as opposed to the film releases, The Hobbit is a game for 2-5 players which utilises a scorecard system rather than individual player pieces. The aim of the game, kill Smaug and find the treasure – simple enough surely?
When opening the box we were pleasantly surprised by the level of detail of the board as well as some rather beautifully illustrated dwarf cards. A lot of work had gone into these which is why we were a bit surprised by the Bilbo and Smaug figures which were plastic and painted red
Having laid out all of the pieces we then tackled the game instructions, which actually took as long as Bilbo’s journey to the Lonely Mountain. Having passed the instructions around we decided to just play the game and when we came to a segment we weren’t sure about, we would refer back. Despite the initial hiatus, The Hobbit is a rather enjoyable game, however not for unseasoned gamers.
The game is split into four adventures. Players must level up their initiative, cunning, and strength in order to battle goblins, fight wolves and escape elves before confronting Smaug himself. On the way, players will also collect gems which is ultimately the aim of the game as the player with the most is declared the winner at the end.
Each adventure comes with a series of adventure cards which break down into Gifts, Abilities and Travelcards. Gift cards present players with attribute benefits; Abilities assist players with battles; and Travelcards move Bilbo along his adventure. When encountering a battle, players must roll five dice in order to match certain conditions before moving on. Should the conditions not be met, players must draw a Dragon card, which incurs penalties and may result in Smaug moving across the board. Should Smaug reach Laketown, the game is over and the player with the most gems is declared the winner.
Having played the game with four other players we did actually have fun once we got into it and overcame the rather confusing rules. My best advice would be to have someone read the instructions before you and your friends sit down together as it can eat into the evening.
Natacha (374 KP) rated Half the World in Books
Dec 15, 2019 (Updated Dec 15, 2019)
As with the first book, the main story is very basic. I group of misfits that are thrown together to complete a quest to find allies. But I still had a blast reading this book.
Things I liked:
-Because the main plot is so simple all characters and their developments are amazing. All of them have their own voice, their own personality and keep evolving and keep you intrigued until the end.
-Thorn. Thorn is a strong female character but with a twist. She is not the typical strong female character that is the best fighter to ever walk this earth, the most beautiful woman to ever walk the earth and who think that loves is something stupid and not for her. No, she tall, muscular, with scars and a weird hair cut. She is a fighter and a killer but you get to see her become one through hard training and strong will. And when she falls in love? She is afraid of it, yes, but when the times comes she doesn't shy away from it, she embraces it and doesn't mind showing a more gentle side of her. That was very nice to see.
-Brand is our second main character and the opposite of Thorn. He is a sweet boy that wants to be a soldier but deep down he just wants to be a good person and do good no matter what.
-There is a love story but it's not the main theme of the story and it's a slow burn one. Initially, I was a little annoyed just because at some point there is a misunderstanding that could have easily been solved by simply talking but the way things evolve later makes up for it.
-The ending left me with the feeling that something big is coming with the next book and made we want to pick it right away.
-We got to see magic! One of my complaints in the first book was that we had elves and magic being mention but never saw any of it.
Things I didn't like
-The main reason why my rating is (4.5 instead of 5 goodreads rating) 9/10 instead of 10/10 if this one. As I mention the main plot is very basic. I group of misfits that are thrown together. They travel a lot, get to know each other, bond and fight bad guys. Unfortunately, although I loved the characters, for more than half of the book I felt disappointed because what I was reading felt very similar to what I had read in book one. In Half a King you had again a group of misfits thrown in a boat together that travelled a lot, had to find a way to survive, they get to know each-other bond and fight bad guys. It sounds like a minor thing but when I picked because it picked up this book straight after the first one it felt repetitive.
Things I liked:
-Because the main plot is so simple all characters and their developments are amazing. All of them have their own voice, their own personality and keep evolving and keep you intrigued until the end.
-Thorn. Thorn is a strong female character but with a twist. She is not the typical strong female character that is the best fighter to ever walk this earth, the most beautiful woman to ever walk the earth and who think that loves is something stupid and not for her. No, she tall, muscular, with scars and a weird hair cut. She is a fighter and a killer but you get to see her become one through hard training and strong will. And when she falls in love? She is afraid of it, yes, but when the times comes she doesn't shy away from it, she embraces it and doesn't mind showing a more gentle side of her. That was very nice to see.
-Brand is our second main character and the opposite of Thorn. He is a sweet boy that wants to be a soldier but deep down he just wants to be a good person and do good no matter what.
-There is a love story but it's not the main theme of the story and it's a slow burn one. Initially, I was a little annoyed just because at some point there is a misunderstanding that could have easily been solved by simply talking but the way things evolve later makes up for it.
-The ending left me with the feeling that something big is coming with the next book and made we want to pick it right away.
-We got to see magic! One of my complaints in the first book was that we had elves and magic being mention but never saw any of it.
Things I didn't like
-The main reason why my rating is (4.5 instead of 5 goodreads rating) 9/10 instead of 10/10 if this one. As I mention the main plot is very basic. I group of misfits that are thrown together. They travel a lot, get to know each other, bond and fight bad guys. Unfortunately, although I loved the characters, for more than half of the book I felt disappointed because what I was reading felt very similar to what I had read in book one. In Half a King you had again a group of misfits thrown in a boat together that travelled a lot, had to find a way to survive, they get to know each-other bond and fight bad guys. It sounds like a minor thing but when I picked because it picked up this book straight after the first one it felt repetitive.
Hazel (1853 KP) rated The Face in the Mountain in Books
Dec 17, 2018
<i>This eBook was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review
The Face in the Mountain </i>is a children’s picture book written by Tolulope Okudolo as part of the publishing company <i>Magnifying Children’s Horizons</i> vision of developing a world in which children learn about and appreciate nature.
The story is set in the fictional world of Vomper Creek where there is always an abundance of natural activity – that is if tree elves, giants and fairies count as “natural”. Papa and Boma are the only giants living in this area and are responsible for making sure nature does everything it is supposed to do. In fact it was Papa who built the mountains in this region to begin with. However Papa is old, frail and tired after working for over two hundred years. He needs to sleep for a century to regain his energy, thus leaving Boma, at a mere seven years of age, to take on all the important tasks.
So begins the main part of the story: Boma is scared and convinced he is unable to remember Papa’s instructions and tries to hide from all his duties. Without his help nature will not be able to function properly. Inspired by an artist he spies in the woods, Boma carves his father’s face into the side of one of the mountains so that he can always see it. This makes him feel less alone and he is able to complete all his jobs to perfection.
The purpose of this book is to help children discover the inner workings of nature and recognize that many things are connected together. For example the wind is needed to blow the seeds into places where they can sprout, then the rain, sun and soil provide the nutrients the plant needs to grow.
At the end of the story is <i>A Children’s Guide to Natural Beings</i>. This is essentially a glossary of the mythical beings featured in the book. The only issue with this is that calling them “natural beings” implies that they are real whereas there is no concrete evidence of their existence. This could give children the wrong impression about the way nature works.
The final pages of the book include a list of learning activities and discussion questions. These could be attempted in schools, in book clubs or at home with parents as a way for children to experience nature for themselves and examine the meaning of the story and the ways in which they can relate it to their own lives.
Eric Scott Fisher beautifully illustrates the book with realistic drawings that are appropriate for children of all ages. Yet there is a slight publishing issue in that the illustrations and body text do not work together. In some instances the text is overlaid on a picture, which makes it difficult to read.
The reading age of this book is approximately seven to ten year olds however younger children will be able to understand it if it is read to them by an adult. The storyline is not that strong but hopefully its purpose – to educate children about nature – will shine through the narrative.
The Face in the Mountain </i>is a children’s picture book written by Tolulope Okudolo as part of the publishing company <i>Magnifying Children’s Horizons</i> vision of developing a world in which children learn about and appreciate nature.
The story is set in the fictional world of Vomper Creek where there is always an abundance of natural activity – that is if tree elves, giants and fairies count as “natural”. Papa and Boma are the only giants living in this area and are responsible for making sure nature does everything it is supposed to do. In fact it was Papa who built the mountains in this region to begin with. However Papa is old, frail and tired after working for over two hundred years. He needs to sleep for a century to regain his energy, thus leaving Boma, at a mere seven years of age, to take on all the important tasks.
So begins the main part of the story: Boma is scared and convinced he is unable to remember Papa’s instructions and tries to hide from all his duties. Without his help nature will not be able to function properly. Inspired by an artist he spies in the woods, Boma carves his father’s face into the side of one of the mountains so that he can always see it. This makes him feel less alone and he is able to complete all his jobs to perfection.
The purpose of this book is to help children discover the inner workings of nature and recognize that many things are connected together. For example the wind is needed to blow the seeds into places where they can sprout, then the rain, sun and soil provide the nutrients the plant needs to grow.
At the end of the story is <i>A Children’s Guide to Natural Beings</i>. This is essentially a glossary of the mythical beings featured in the book. The only issue with this is that calling them “natural beings” implies that they are real whereas there is no concrete evidence of their existence. This could give children the wrong impression about the way nature works.
The final pages of the book include a list of learning activities and discussion questions. These could be attempted in schools, in book clubs or at home with parents as a way for children to experience nature for themselves and examine the meaning of the story and the ways in which they can relate it to their own lives.
Eric Scott Fisher beautifully illustrates the book with realistic drawings that are appropriate for children of all ages. Yet there is a slight publishing issue in that the illustrations and body text do not work together. In some instances the text is overlaid on a picture, which makes it difficult to read.
The reading age of this book is approximately seven to ten year olds however younger children will be able to understand it if it is read to them by an adult. The storyline is not that strong but hopefully its purpose – to educate children about nature – will shine through the narrative.
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Emma @ The Movies (1786 KP) rated Fatman (2020) in Movies
Dec 21, 2020
I'll level with you on this one, I had no idea what I was in for, but Mel Gibson as a crazed looking Santa had me sold, so I went ahead a brought this one on DVD.
As Santa tries to keep his workshop afloat in ever trying naughty times. But as he diversifies his team, a new problem raises its ugly head, eternally naughty Billy is less than impressed by his coal and hires a hitman to take Santa out of the festivities for good.
The idea of making this sort of Christmas film is wonderful to me, the action-packed ride of a thriller with just enough festivity to make it a great alternative Christmas movie choice... *chef's kiss*
Bringing the added twist of children getting a little less nice every year, we see the stark reality that this brings to Santa's business model. It gives him the very modern concern of traditional businesses... and I really liked that angle.
Gibson in the gruff but jolly role of Santa fits well with this aesthetic, and the way he manages to turn Santa into a hardened action star really amused me. There were great subtleties in the character and I loved how we saw his changes, and how they dealt with the mystery of Santa as an eternal, all-knowing character. And for that matter, the elves and how they prove to be the most effective workforce on the planet.
Pitted against Santa we have Walton Goggins as our hitman and Chance Hurstfield as Billy... who is the first person I have wished a reindeer trampling on. Billy is the evil part of the baddie contingent, while the Skinny Man (as he's named on IMDb) really feels like he's just bad for the paycheck and you'd actually bring him round after a good talking to. Goggins has an interesting backstory to his character, and yet for some reason we never get a very satisfying look at it. An opportunity missed that leaves part of the storyline a little unanswered.
Almost instantly I was struck by the look of the film, the general muted tones with punctuations of red and green made for very strong visuals. The snow-covered scenery and rustic feel to Santa's compound was a lovely addition too, and it was a refreshing change to the vibrant and excessively cheery depiction of a "traditional" Santa's village.
While I loved the idea they were conjuring here, there were bits of the execution that didn't feel quite right. For an action film, it was missing some... kapow... literally. The explosions had no wow factor and seemed rather tame for this outlandish tale. The film also felt like it was trying to be too many different things. Billy's overly animated maniacal behaviour felt like it was trying to keep the film for a younger audience, but with a 15 rating that was out of their reach. This, coupled with the missing Goggins backstory felt like they weren't convinced by their own ideas. With the film being quite a short 1 hour 40 I think it could have stood a few additions here and there.
I'm definitely here for the menacing Father Christmas, and more actiony Christmas movies in my life. The way they switched this one up put a genuine smile on my face.
Originally posted on: https://emmaatthemovies.blogspot.com/2020/12/fatman-movie-review.html
As Santa tries to keep his workshop afloat in ever trying naughty times. But as he diversifies his team, a new problem raises its ugly head, eternally naughty Billy is less than impressed by his coal and hires a hitman to take Santa out of the festivities for good.
The idea of making this sort of Christmas film is wonderful to me, the action-packed ride of a thriller with just enough festivity to make it a great alternative Christmas movie choice... *chef's kiss*
Bringing the added twist of children getting a little less nice every year, we see the stark reality that this brings to Santa's business model. It gives him the very modern concern of traditional businesses... and I really liked that angle.
Gibson in the gruff but jolly role of Santa fits well with this aesthetic, and the way he manages to turn Santa into a hardened action star really amused me. There were great subtleties in the character and I loved how we saw his changes, and how they dealt with the mystery of Santa as an eternal, all-knowing character. And for that matter, the elves and how they prove to be the most effective workforce on the planet.
Pitted against Santa we have Walton Goggins as our hitman and Chance Hurstfield as Billy... who is the first person I have wished a reindeer trampling on. Billy is the evil part of the baddie contingent, while the Skinny Man (as he's named on IMDb) really feels like he's just bad for the paycheck and you'd actually bring him round after a good talking to. Goggins has an interesting backstory to his character, and yet for some reason we never get a very satisfying look at it. An opportunity missed that leaves part of the storyline a little unanswered.
Almost instantly I was struck by the look of the film, the general muted tones with punctuations of red and green made for very strong visuals. The snow-covered scenery and rustic feel to Santa's compound was a lovely addition too, and it was a refreshing change to the vibrant and excessively cheery depiction of a "traditional" Santa's village.
While I loved the idea they were conjuring here, there were bits of the execution that didn't feel quite right. For an action film, it was missing some... kapow... literally. The explosions had no wow factor and seemed rather tame for this outlandish tale. The film also felt like it was trying to be too many different things. Billy's overly animated maniacal behaviour felt like it was trying to keep the film for a younger audience, but with a 15 rating that was out of their reach. This, coupled with the missing Goggins backstory felt like they weren't convinced by their own ideas. With the film being quite a short 1 hour 40 I think it could have stood a few additions here and there.
I'm definitely here for the menacing Father Christmas, and more actiony Christmas movies in my life. The way they switched this one up put a genuine smile on my face.
Originally posted on: https://emmaatthemovies.blogspot.com/2020/12/fatman-movie-review.html
Kirk Bage (1775 KP) rated Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga (2020) in Movies
Aug 6, 2020
Much like Eurovision itself, this film shouldn’t be entertaining in any way, but after watching it for ten minutes it becomes a compelling car crash you kinda have to see out to the end. It doesn’t really matter what you think of the songs, you are watching it waiting for the one thing you can make fun of, rubbing your eyes in disbelief that anything so camp and lame can exist.
Will Ferrell understands this of course. There is so much about the weird world of Eurovision to make fun of. The naff music, the costumes, the lost in translation moments from obscure countries trying their best and mostly failing to realise how daft they look. Enjoying this film depends on how funny you find Ferrell, not on any love of cheesy pop songs. Fortunately, I find him usually hilarious.
Not that every joke lands, or even makes sense at all. It is as bizarre as the contest itself; you just have to leave your brain at the door and go with it. There is a lot to like. Not least the adorable and consistently watchable Rachel McAdams who seems the perfect choice to play Sigrit, the girl dreaming of having the world hear her sing and strive for her spirit note. There is also an odd turn from Pierce Brosnan, who makes no effort whatsoever to make it good, and comes full circle in being so bad it’s amazing.
The joke is that they are from Iceland, who never win the thing, or ever come close. The country itself doesn’t want to win, as they would have to pay for it next year, so, after a bizarre accident where every other candidate explodes, they turn to the naive duo of Fire Saga, who are guaranteed to be a joke. And they are. But of course we are on their side, as they live the dream and go for underdog glory. What can go wrong does, and every comedy trope in the book is trotted out, along with a huge dose of sentimentality.
Naturally there is music. Ranging from the excruciating to the actually not too bad, to the hmmm, I actual like that! One highlight is a montage piece in the middle, as all contestants jam at a pre-final party – just so much fun and a totally catchy song. I am not entirely ashamed to say that it kinda got me. The pathos leading up to the climax hit me in the vulnerable feels, as I lay on a Sunday morning helpfully hung-over and tender. This is the way to watch it, I feel, or, you know, with young kids, who will lap up the silliness and talent show sensibility.
Look, it’s terrible on any artistic or serious level. The script is a mess, the direction could have been phoned in by a chimp, and the plot serves to say nothing new or inciteful, but it doesn’t matter. Watch it, have a chuckle and then throw it away. I can think of many less innocent comedies that are far less worthy of attention. And at the very least, there is a bit with elves that had me pressing pause till I got all my laughs out.
Pick a day when you have no energy to fight the world or string two thoughts together and just enjoy it.
Decinemal Rating: 63
Will Ferrell understands this of course. There is so much about the weird world of Eurovision to make fun of. The naff music, the costumes, the lost in translation moments from obscure countries trying their best and mostly failing to realise how daft they look. Enjoying this film depends on how funny you find Ferrell, not on any love of cheesy pop songs. Fortunately, I find him usually hilarious.
Not that every joke lands, or even makes sense at all. It is as bizarre as the contest itself; you just have to leave your brain at the door and go with it. There is a lot to like. Not least the adorable and consistently watchable Rachel McAdams who seems the perfect choice to play Sigrit, the girl dreaming of having the world hear her sing and strive for her spirit note. There is also an odd turn from Pierce Brosnan, who makes no effort whatsoever to make it good, and comes full circle in being so bad it’s amazing.
The joke is that they are from Iceland, who never win the thing, or ever come close. The country itself doesn’t want to win, as they would have to pay for it next year, so, after a bizarre accident where every other candidate explodes, they turn to the naive duo of Fire Saga, who are guaranteed to be a joke. And they are. But of course we are on their side, as they live the dream and go for underdog glory. What can go wrong does, and every comedy trope in the book is trotted out, along with a huge dose of sentimentality.
Naturally there is music. Ranging from the excruciating to the actually not too bad, to the hmmm, I actual like that! One highlight is a montage piece in the middle, as all contestants jam at a pre-final party – just so much fun and a totally catchy song. I am not entirely ashamed to say that it kinda got me. The pathos leading up to the climax hit me in the vulnerable feels, as I lay on a Sunday morning helpfully hung-over and tender. This is the way to watch it, I feel, or, you know, with young kids, who will lap up the silliness and talent show sensibility.
Look, it’s terrible on any artistic or serious level. The script is a mess, the direction could have been phoned in by a chimp, and the plot serves to say nothing new or inciteful, but it doesn’t matter. Watch it, have a chuckle and then throw it away. I can think of many less innocent comedies that are far less worthy of attention. And at the very least, there is a bit with elves that had me pressing pause till I got all my laughs out.
Pick a day when you have no energy to fight the world or string two thoughts together and just enjoy it.
Decinemal Rating: 63
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Mandy and G.D. Burkhead (26 KP) rated The Grey Bastards in Books
May 20, 2018
Shelf Life – The Grey Bastards Exemplifies Grimdark Fantasy at Its Damn Finest
Contains spoilers, click to show
The Grey Bastards is a fun, foul-mouthed read. If you’re turned off by bad language, steamy sex, or a good plot with plenty of action and twists, then this book isn’t for you. The Grey Bastards falls into the fantasy sub-genre known as grimdark. Where high fantasy has your Tolkien beautiful and noble elves, dwarves, humans, and wizards with epic battles between good and evil, grimdark takes all of that and covers it in shit, pus, and blood. Notice how in high fantasy nobody ever takes a piss or fucks? In grimdark, everyone does.
But don’t be fooled into thinking this book will be any less intelligent, epic, or heartfelt for it. The Grey Bastards is all of that and more. The novel follows Jackal, a half-breed orc living in the Lot Lands, the barren desert wasteland of Hispartha. He is a Grey Bastard, one of many half-orc hoofs, each protecting its own small town in the Lots. Members of a hoof are elite warriors that ride out on their Barbarians—giant warthogs—and slaughter invading bands of orcs.
Hispartha is a vibrant world, with a mix of fantastical species (orcs, half-orcs, elves, humans, halflings, and centaurs) with unique cultures and religions. Hispartha itself takes influences from Reconquista Spain, which is especially noticeable in the nomenclature, geography, and architecture.
The primarily atheistic half-orcs recently won their freedom from slavery at the hands of humans. Humans treat the half-orcs like second-class citizens, but tolerate them because of their strength, using them as a shield from the orcs. The elves are beautiful, reclusive, and probably the most cliché; there is one important elf character, but for the most part, we don’t get a good look into their culture in the first book. The centaurs worship Romanesque deities and go on crazed, Bacchanalian killing sprees during the blood moon.
Besides the half-orcs, the halflings are perhaps the most interesting. I still have a hard time visualizing them, trying to figure out if they are thin, pixie-like creatures or more stocky like dwarves. Their small stature and black skin makes me think of pygmies. They worship a god they expect will reincarnate someday, (view spoiler)
One thing that has always annoyed me about fantasy is that many authors feel that the characters of their world, being pre-industrial and thus “medieval,” must all be white, straight, Christian (or proto-Christian), cisgender males. If a woman appears at all is to act as the damsel, prize, or, if she’s lucky, a mystical enchantress to guide the heroes or provide a maguffin. It has come to the point in which this has become a tired and accepted baseline for fantasy. I don’t necessarily think that these fantasy authors are intentionally trying to be uninclusive, so much as they just seem to forget that other groups of people can exist in fantasy thanks to its fathers, Tolkien and Lewis.
But enough with my rant, the purpose of which is to highlight why I am often drawn to grimdark fantasy: at the very least I know that women, people of color, lgbt people, and other religions will be present, even if they are often victimized. This is because grimdark fantasy honestly depicts the horrors of rape, war, murder, slavery, and racism (or rather, speciesism in most cases) and has heroes and villains that are morally grey.
However, many authors describe these atrocities and then leave it at that, assuming that simply depicting them is enough to make a book mature and meaningful. They often fail to make any sort of statement on evil, and thus can seem to be, at best, blindly accepting it and, at worst, glorifying it (this often happens in the cases of magnificent bastard characters, who are absolute monsters but are so charming you almost respect or like them).
Jonathan French, however, does not fall short of the mark as many authors do, and for two main reasons: humor and humanity.
Let’s start with the humor. This book is hilarious. I mean in the I literally laughed out loud while reading it way. Sure, the jokes are often crass, but I have a dirty mind, so inappropriate humor is my favorite kind. The dialogue is especially top-notch, and the interactions between Jackal and his friends Fetching and Oats feel genuine, full of in-jokes, insults, and sexually-charged humor, all of which are exactly how I interact with my own close friends. And every major character in this book is so damn witty that I’m honestly jealous of them. If I could be quick enough to make even one of their zingers at the right time in a conversation, I would feel proud of myself for the rest of the day.
Humor is necessary to prevent any grimdark fantasy from becoming too over-the-top or depressing. And honestly, humor is needed most when the world is a dark and frightening place. But too much humor could accidentally downplay the point of grimdark: the brutally honest depiction of the atrocities that people are capable of.
And this is where it is important to have an element of humanity. By this I mean that the “good guys” must make some action or statement on those atrocities. Too often I read or watch hardened badass characters with no emotion who can watch a person get tortured and killed without flinching (maybe even do it themselves) and who never stop to question the nature of their society (even as part of their character growth), and I have difficulty finding them at all relatable or even the least bit interesting.
Now, often for this type of character, he or she is dead inside as a coping mechanism and part of their character arc is learning to allow themselves to feel their repressed emotions: heartbreak, anger, fear, etc. This can be done very well (see The Hunger Games for a great example—dystopian scifi and grimdark fantasy have very similar undertones). But most times it just ends up falling flat.
But Jackal already starts out with more personality than most grimdark protagonists. He is a humorous and light-hearted person. Sure, he lives in a desert wasteland, his race is entirely created by rape, he’s treated as a second-class citizen, and his life and the lives of those around him are in constant danger of rape and/or murder by invading orcs or blood-crazed centaurs. But despite all of that, he still has a sense of humor, people he loves, a community, ambitions, moral code, and all of the other things that these protagonists are often lacking.
Don’t get me wrong, he can be an asshole, and he’s often acts rashly before he thinks. But the scene that really stuck with me the most was [when Jackal and the wizard Crafty come across an unconscious elf sex-slave. I was expecting him to say something along the lines of “There’s nothing we can do for her, we have to save ourselves” or “This isn’t any of our business” or “It would be best to just put her out of her mercy.” These are the typical lines that a grimdark protagonist might utter while their companion—accused of being a bleeding heart—frees the slave. But this was not the case. Jackal and Crafty both immediately set out to free the girl and steal her away from her owner, despite the danger to themselves. And when he comes across an entire castle-full of these women, Jackal again sets about freeing them without a moment’s hesitation. (hide spoiler)]
And it’s no surprise that Jackal has a serious problem with rape. As I’ve mentioned before, half-orcs are entirely the product of roving bands of orcs raping human, elven, or even half-orc women. [When Jackal learns that Starling, the elf slave he rescued, is pregnant with a half-orc baby, he is not only furious with the orcs that gang-raped her, but also disturbed by the fact that elven society shuns any of their women who have been raped, and that these victims often end up taking their own lives rather than give birth to an impure half-elf. (hide spoiler)]
Furthermore, Jackal, unlike many people in Hispartha, does not buy into misogyny or sexism. His best friend Fetching is the first female half-orc to have joined a group of riders. Not only does Jackal respect Fetching, he understands the emotional turmoil that she is dealing with being the first female rider and how she overcompensates as a result to earn the respect of the other men.
While there is quite a bit of speciesism (pretty much none of the species get along with one another), the inhabitants of Hispartha come in every skin color and nobody gives a damn. Furthermore, sexuality is primarily treated as each person’s individual preference and nobody else’s business. While characters may make jokes about acting “backy” (gay), these are made in good humor between friends, and nobody gets particularly offended by them. Fetching is herself openly bisexual (though she seems to suppress her heterosexual desires more than her homosexual ones out of that same need to be “one of the boys”), and Oats and Jackal are one of my favorite bromantic pairings.
Grimdark fantasy can often be depressing to read. But Jonathan French does an excellent job of infusing hope into his narrative. The story actually has a happier ending than I was expecting. [I was especially pleased when Jackal chooses Fetching to be the new leader of the hoof (she is voted in unanimously by the other riders). I find it incredibly annoying in books and movies when revolutionaries/usurpers decide to appoint themselves leaders, as the former does not qualify you for the latter. Part of Jackal’s arc is realizing that he is not meant to lead the hoof like he’d once desired. (hide spoiler)]
For the sequel, The True Bastards, I’m hoping to see [if a cure can be found for the thrice-blood child now infected with plague, how Fetching is doing leading the hoof, and what the mysterious Starling is up to (I don’t buy for a second that she’s killed herself). And of course, I fully expect that Jackal is going to have to fulfill his empty promise to the halfling’s resurrected god, Belico.
But don’t be fooled into thinking this book will be any less intelligent, epic, or heartfelt for it. The Grey Bastards is all of that and more. The novel follows Jackal, a half-breed orc living in the Lot Lands, the barren desert wasteland of Hispartha. He is a Grey Bastard, one of many half-orc hoofs, each protecting its own small town in the Lots. Members of a hoof are elite warriors that ride out on their Barbarians—giant warthogs—and slaughter invading bands of orcs.
Hispartha is a vibrant world, with a mix of fantastical species (orcs, half-orcs, elves, humans, halflings, and centaurs) with unique cultures and religions. Hispartha itself takes influences from Reconquista Spain, which is especially noticeable in the nomenclature, geography, and architecture.
The primarily atheistic half-orcs recently won their freedom from slavery at the hands of humans. Humans treat the half-orcs like second-class citizens, but tolerate them because of their strength, using them as a shield from the orcs. The elves are beautiful, reclusive, and probably the most cliché; there is one important elf character, but for the most part, we don’t get a good look into their culture in the first book. The centaurs worship Romanesque deities and go on crazed, Bacchanalian killing sprees during the blood moon.
Besides the half-orcs, the halflings are perhaps the most interesting. I still have a hard time visualizing them, trying to figure out if they are thin, pixie-like creatures or more stocky like dwarves. Their small stature and black skin makes me think of pygmies. They worship a god they expect will reincarnate someday, (view spoiler)
One thing that has always annoyed me about fantasy is that many authors feel that the characters of their world, being pre-industrial and thus “medieval,” must all be white, straight, Christian (or proto-Christian), cisgender males. If a woman appears at all is to act as the damsel, prize, or, if she’s lucky, a mystical enchantress to guide the heroes or provide a maguffin. It has come to the point in which this has become a tired and accepted baseline for fantasy. I don’t necessarily think that these fantasy authors are intentionally trying to be uninclusive, so much as they just seem to forget that other groups of people can exist in fantasy thanks to its fathers, Tolkien and Lewis.
But enough with my rant, the purpose of which is to highlight why I am often drawn to grimdark fantasy: at the very least I know that women, people of color, lgbt people, and other religions will be present, even if they are often victimized. This is because grimdark fantasy honestly depicts the horrors of rape, war, murder, slavery, and racism (or rather, speciesism in most cases) and has heroes and villains that are morally grey.
However, many authors describe these atrocities and then leave it at that, assuming that simply depicting them is enough to make a book mature and meaningful. They often fail to make any sort of statement on evil, and thus can seem to be, at best, blindly accepting it and, at worst, glorifying it (this often happens in the cases of magnificent bastard characters, who are absolute monsters but are so charming you almost respect or like them).
Jonathan French, however, does not fall short of the mark as many authors do, and for two main reasons: humor and humanity.
Let’s start with the humor. This book is hilarious. I mean in the I literally laughed out loud while reading it way. Sure, the jokes are often crass, but I have a dirty mind, so inappropriate humor is my favorite kind. The dialogue is especially top-notch, and the interactions between Jackal and his friends Fetching and Oats feel genuine, full of in-jokes, insults, and sexually-charged humor, all of which are exactly how I interact with my own close friends. And every major character in this book is so damn witty that I’m honestly jealous of them. If I could be quick enough to make even one of their zingers at the right time in a conversation, I would feel proud of myself for the rest of the day.
Humor is necessary to prevent any grimdark fantasy from becoming too over-the-top or depressing. And honestly, humor is needed most when the world is a dark and frightening place. But too much humor could accidentally downplay the point of grimdark: the brutally honest depiction of the atrocities that people are capable of.
And this is where it is important to have an element of humanity. By this I mean that the “good guys” must make some action or statement on those atrocities. Too often I read or watch hardened badass characters with no emotion who can watch a person get tortured and killed without flinching (maybe even do it themselves) and who never stop to question the nature of their society (even as part of their character growth), and I have difficulty finding them at all relatable or even the least bit interesting.
Now, often for this type of character, he or she is dead inside as a coping mechanism and part of their character arc is learning to allow themselves to feel their repressed emotions: heartbreak, anger, fear, etc. This can be done very well (see The Hunger Games for a great example—dystopian scifi and grimdark fantasy have very similar undertones). But most times it just ends up falling flat.
But Jackal already starts out with more personality than most grimdark protagonists. He is a humorous and light-hearted person. Sure, he lives in a desert wasteland, his race is entirely created by rape, he’s treated as a second-class citizen, and his life and the lives of those around him are in constant danger of rape and/or murder by invading orcs or blood-crazed centaurs. But despite all of that, he still has a sense of humor, people he loves, a community, ambitions, moral code, and all of the other things that these protagonists are often lacking.
Don’t get me wrong, he can be an asshole, and he’s often acts rashly before he thinks. But the scene that really stuck with me the most was [when Jackal and the wizard Crafty come across an unconscious elf sex-slave. I was expecting him to say something along the lines of “There’s nothing we can do for her, we have to save ourselves” or “This isn’t any of our business” or “It would be best to just put her out of her mercy.” These are the typical lines that a grimdark protagonist might utter while their companion—accused of being a bleeding heart—frees the slave. But this was not the case. Jackal and Crafty both immediately set out to free the girl and steal her away from her owner, despite the danger to themselves. And when he comes across an entire castle-full of these women, Jackal again sets about freeing them without a moment’s hesitation. (hide spoiler)]
And it’s no surprise that Jackal has a serious problem with rape. As I’ve mentioned before, half-orcs are entirely the product of roving bands of orcs raping human, elven, or even half-orc women. [When Jackal learns that Starling, the elf slave he rescued, is pregnant with a half-orc baby, he is not only furious with the orcs that gang-raped her, but also disturbed by the fact that elven society shuns any of their women who have been raped, and that these victims often end up taking their own lives rather than give birth to an impure half-elf. (hide spoiler)]
Furthermore, Jackal, unlike many people in Hispartha, does not buy into misogyny or sexism. His best friend Fetching is the first female half-orc to have joined a group of riders. Not only does Jackal respect Fetching, he understands the emotional turmoil that she is dealing with being the first female rider and how she overcompensates as a result to earn the respect of the other men.
While there is quite a bit of speciesism (pretty much none of the species get along with one another), the inhabitants of Hispartha come in every skin color and nobody gives a damn. Furthermore, sexuality is primarily treated as each person’s individual preference and nobody else’s business. While characters may make jokes about acting “backy” (gay), these are made in good humor between friends, and nobody gets particularly offended by them. Fetching is herself openly bisexual (though she seems to suppress her heterosexual desires more than her homosexual ones out of that same need to be “one of the boys”), and Oats and Jackal are one of my favorite bromantic pairings.
Grimdark fantasy can often be depressing to read. But Jonathan French does an excellent job of infusing hope into his narrative. The story actually has a happier ending than I was expecting. [I was especially pleased when Jackal chooses Fetching to be the new leader of the hoof (she is voted in unanimously by the other riders). I find it incredibly annoying in books and movies when revolutionaries/usurpers decide to appoint themselves leaders, as the former does not qualify you for the latter. Part of Jackal’s arc is realizing that he is not meant to lead the hoof like he’d once desired. (hide spoiler)]
For the sequel, The True Bastards, I’m hoping to see [if a cure can be found for the thrice-blood child now infected with plague, how Fetching is doing leading the hoof, and what the mysterious Starling is up to (I don’t buy for a second that she’s killed herself). And of course, I fully expect that Jackal is going to have to fulfill his empty promise to the halfling’s resurrected god, Belico.