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Charlie Cobra Reviews (1840 KP) rated the Nintendo Switch version of Secret Neighbor in Video Games

Sep 4, 2021  
Secret Neighbor
Secret Neighbor
2021 | Horror
The Concept (1 more)
Playing as the Neighbor
Balancing, the Neighbor is too OP (1 more)
Playing as a kid isn't very fun
Fun And Intriguing Concept But Suffers From Balancing Issues
Secret Neighbor is a multiplayer Social/Horror game developed by Hologryph and published by tinyBuild Games. It is a spin-off of the Hello Neighbor franchise/series and is available on Nintendo Switch, Xbox One, and PC. Secret Neighbor was initially released in October 2019 and just recently on August 26th 2021 for Nintendo Switch. The game supports up to 6 players who must work as a group to unlock the basement. Just one catch, one of you is the Neighbor in disguise.

 I have to say first off that this kind of game is not something that I would normally play. I think my favorite games to play are FPS's, RPG's and probably fighting or adventure games. That being said, I'm also an OG gamer who have been playing games for over 30 years since Super Mario Bros. on the NES. So I've played all kinds of different kind of games and have definitely found some that were more fun than I thought they would be. This was not one of them. The game has an easy enough concept that I didn't understand at first but after reading about the game it's based off of, it makes sense. The game Hello Neighbor is kind of like a kid's version of the movie Disturbia. Your Shia LeBeouf and need to get into your Neighbor's basement after witnessing something suspicious and disturbing.

 However in this game Secret Neighbor, your not on your own. You have a group of neighborhood kids, your friends, who are there to help get into the basement too. Your job is to work together to sneak around the house and collect the keys that unlock the basement door. You can use perks and abilities unique to each class of characters. For example the detective starts with a photo of a key location, while the bagger has an extra item slot. There are six different characters altogether and you can cooperate by teaming up and staying together or splitting up and exploring alone. What could go wrong right? Well that's where the secret in Secret Neighbor comes to play. One of you is a traitor, the Neighbor in disguise. As the neighbor your job is to stop the intruders by capturing them all. You can transform in and out of your disguise and also setup traps. There are a couple of different game modes as well as a level editor for you to create your own maze and invite friends to play.

 So I went into this game with low expectations. Like I said, I'm not that big a fan of this genre or style type of game but I've heard good things about similar games like Dead by Daylight and Among Us which share some characteristics with this game, so I said why not. So going into the game right away I realized there was a learning curve. As I was trying to learn the controls and figure out what was what, I was immediately scooped up by the Neighbor and game over. This game can be really frustrating for new players in that way. Kind of reminded me of some games that are Battle Royale, like Apex because once you are captured by the Neighbor, it's game over. You can stay and watch the game and see if any of the kids make it or if the Neighbor captures everybody and win, or you can choose to leave the game without penalty. I chose to start a new game because I was determined to do better.

 The controls are actually really simple, so it's not real confusing or hard to learn. You have two slots for items, and start off with the flashlight. It's like your best friend because of how dark the lighting is in the game. You can pick up items along the way, random things you can throw like boxes, milk cartons, potted plants, etc... You can also pick up more important items like key cards and keys. The key cards get you into restricted rooms and the keys unlock the basement which is where you need to go to win the game. I think this game is really unbalanced. On way play through a player didn't even try being sneaky and just transformed into the Neighbor and captured us all. There wasn't even anything we could do about it. Then on another play through I was actually with some competent or experienced players who were finding keys right away. The problem this game faces, is the same every cooperative game faces, which is nobody works together. The Neighbor has the edge every time. I played a game where there were some really good players who knew how to throw items really good and would rescue each other and the other players from the Neighbor but he still won and captured everyone.

 The concept was interesting and sounded cool. To me it seemed something like Among Us, where you got to figure out who the Neighbor is because it's secretly one of the group and they will use that to capture everyone in secret without revealing their identity. As far as playability however, that isn't usually how it goes down and I feel the game suffers from balance issues making it not as fun as it could be. When you're the Neighbor it can be extremely fun but as the kids not so much. The graphics were good and I liked the character designs and the enviroments. It had it's own weird charm kind of like the movie Coraline. A little bit creepy and strange but not bad. There are some bad animations that happen here and there and things that don't go as smooth as they should. For example, sometimes you can close a door and someone will walk right through it. I also sat and watched as someone playing as the Neighbor couldn't capture someone hiding in a wardrobe because they kept closing the door or they kept closing the door on accident trying to capture the kid. It happened for like 3 minutes and eventually the Neighbor moved on. I also didn't like the speed movement as you walked around, I think you could push in on the control stick to run but it didn't seem that much faster or last for that long.

 The sound was great. I particularly liked the little guitar riff when waiting for a game to load up. The sound effects for actions in the game were adequate and the voice overs fit the characters but nothing that really stood out. The game definitely has its moments and can be pretty fun at times. I really enjoyed playing as the Neighbor. To sneak around as a kid and then transform into the Neighbor when you're alone in a room and capture them, then transform back and rejoin the group is thrilling. But lack of team work and communication makes most playthrough as a kid very frustrating. Playing as the detective lets you find keys easier, playing as the bagger helps you hold an extra item, but nothing really helped to escape the clutches of the Neighbor. I think one of the characters the Brave class is supposed to make escape easier but when I played as her it didn't really help. Maybe if the game had a story mode I would be more invested in it but since it was just multiplayer it got pretty repetitive and not as fun rather quickly. I would say that this game isn't for everybody but if it sounds like something similar to a game you've liked playing before, then I can see you picking it up and playing for a couple of hours here and there. As such I would say it has a moderate replay value. I give this game a 6/10.
  
Paragon: Trials of the Chosen
Paragon: Trials of the Chosen
2021 | Card Game, Fantasy, Fighting
I am going to start off with complete honesty. I have been dreading writing this review. Not because I am afraid to give anything negative criticism or because a game has been too daunting for me, but rather, because I still do not feel that after all my plays of this game that I have an absolute understanding of each of its components. I hope you will continue reading as I explain what I mean.

Paragon: Trials of the Chosen (which I will lovingly refer to as Paragon from here on out) is a fantasy deck construction fighting card game where players will be outfitting their chosen avatars with awesome gear and abilities and sending them to battle against other players’ avatars. All players will know EXACTLY what is in their draw deck AND in what order because they have constructed it card by card and the deck will never be shuffled. Intrigued?

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup, each player chooses two avatars with whom they will play. Avatars belong to one or two different Disciplines, which allows players to construct their deck with Discipline-specific cards to be used during the game. As part of setup, each player will choose 20 cards from the gigantic deck of Equipment and Ability cards with which they will form their deck for play. Per the rules, each player will then place their chosen avatars and ordered decks in front of themselves along with a blue 1d10, the green 1d10 (all set to 1 to begin), and pile of Hearts tokens. Players draw their starting hand of five cards and the battle can begin!
The green 1d10 notates the round number, and the blue 1d10 per player represents their current Energy. To bring cards into play a player will spend the printed amount of Energy and track this on their 1d10.

Each round is played over several phases. The game is designed to play to 10 rounds, but players may play past 10 while keeping the round tracker and Energy static for all rounds after 10. The first phase is the Start Phase, and acts as a maintenance phase where players will activate any “Start Phase” effects from played cards, ready all exhausted cards, increase all the d10s, and draw the top card from their deck. Should a player be unable to draw a card during this phase due to the draw deck being empty, they immediately lose the game.

The second phase is the beefy Main Phase. This is where all the action happens. During this phase, players will take turns playing cards until both players have passed. On a turn a player will have the choice of five actions: Play a Card, Trigger an Activated Effect, Declare an Attack, Channel Energy, and Pass. To Play a Card the active player will pay the cost (in Energy) printed on the card and bring it into play exhausted. Cards brought into play this way will be attached to one of the avatars and act as an equipment or new ability, as long as the card played matches the Discipline of the avatar to which it is attached.

To Trigger an Activated Effect, the player will need to satisfy any qualifying conditions of the activation, which are printed on the card. These abilities can vary wildly and add immense strategy to play.

Once a player believes they have enough firepower attached to their avatars they may instead Declare an Attack by announcing their target and exhausting the card that is attacking. It is here that Paragon strays from the norm. Instead of damage simply being dealt to the opponent, the player may engage in a volley of playing Instant cards from hand (and paying their Energy costs) to add to the card stack. This is important, as the stack is then resolved in reverse order of play. So the last card to be played on the stack will be resolved first. This can result in attacks being nullified or shielded before they even proc. Sneaky and wily players will certainly use this phase wisely to draw out cards from their opponents’ hands. Once the stack is built, it is resolved and damage is calculated.

Players may instead elect to Channel Energy by exhausting one of their avatars to add 1 Energy to their pool. This may be repeated as long as the other avatar is available to be exhausted.

Lastly, and most easily, when players have no other actions they can or wish to complete, they may Pass in order to close out the round of phases.


When both players have Passed, the End Phase begins, and acts as another maintenance cleanup phase to ready players for the next round. This includes resolving any “End Phase” effects and increasing the round d10 by 1. The game ends once a player’s two avatars have been defeated or a player is unable to draw a card from their draw deck. The winner then boasts mightily in the face of their competitor and spews taunts and rematch challenges.
Components. This one is simple. Paragon has a giant stack of cards, a few d10s, and some wooden Heart tokens. The tokens are double-sided with a 1 printed on one side and a 3 on the other. These are obviously to track HP loss, and are fine. The 3d10 in this version are entry-level, and I will probably bling it out with some d10s that are more themed. The cards. Okay, I will certainly be sleeving this game. I want to keep my copy in excellent condition for as long as I can. In the last photo here, I splayed out the avatars that are currently included, and all the other cards stacked are the equipment and abilities to be attached to the avatars. I have no problems with the components in Paragon (I just want to get more exciting d10s to use).

There really is an insane amount of choice and customization that can be had in constructing a deck for the chosen avatars, and that is precisely why I mention in the opening that I have yet to understand all the components: how will I ever be able to perfect a combination that speaks to me and works with my style when I have about a zillion options available? I know many gamers will salivate over the amount of deliberation and possibilities contained in the box, and after several plays, I find myself weighing options in my head throughout the day. When you think about a game throughout the day and how you will attempt to play it next time, I feel that is a sign of a truly great game for you.

This is certainly not for everyone, but it definitely is for me. I truly cannot wait to try out different combinations, strategies, and deck configurations each time I play. I can also see Paragon being ripe for multiple expansions, with new avatars representing new Disciplines, or adding in expansion material that is themed for different IPs or historical eras. Well, I guess it is time to pick up a part-time job to fund my Paragon expansions.

If you are like me and enjoy games that offer near-infinite possibilities and the true feeling of never playing the same game twice, then Paragon needs to be on your shelf. The rules are easily-digestible, games take 30 minutes once you are familiar with it, and there are a ton of unique cards included in this box. Purple Phoenix Games gives Paragon an excited 5 / 6. I really think that with more plays and tweaks to my copy (maybe an expansion or two thrown in) this could eek up to a 6 and earn a Golden Feather Award from me. It is smooth, exciting, and just oozing with customization that many gamers are going to absolutely love. Go find yourself a copy and get it to the table right away!
  
Captain America: Civil War (2016)
Captain America: Civil War (2016)
2016 | Action, Sci-Fi
Battle Royale
Contains spoilers, click to show
This movie is amazing. I know, I’m supposed to start with an intro but this film is just too good. I knew that I would love it and that I was looking forward to it for a fairly long time, but I loved this movie in ways that I didn’t even expect to. Based on the seminal Mark Millar event comic that saw most of the Marvel comic book universe go up against each other, this movie pits the heroes of the MCU against each other, which results in an exciting battle of all of the heroes that we’ve grown to love. The film doesn’t take much else from the comic though, other than the idea of the heroes fighting one another, there is no talk of exposing secret identities here, nor is there a battle between the massive amount of combatants that there were in the comic. If someone had told me these facts before I saw the film, I would have been going into the movie on a downer, but the thing is that this movie doesn’t have to be totally faithful to the comic book to be great, which is a credit to the writers and directors of the film. Watching the film is still like watching a comic book onscreen, just not the same comic book that you have previously read, which is awesome.

The vast majority of the cast of characters that have been introduced in the MCU so far are present here, besides Thor and Hulk. I can see why they omitted these characters, as they really would have given whatever side they chose an unfair advantage. We are left with two sides, there is Team Cap, made up of Cap, Falcon, Bucky, Ant Man, Scarlett Witch and Hawkeye and then there is Team Stark, made up of Iron Man, Vision, Black Widow, War Machine, Black Panther and Spiderman. I went into this movie siding with Team Cap, probably because Iron Man was ultimately the antagonist in the book, but as the film progressed, I have to admit that I could see either side of the argument. The fight sequences are exciting, due to the excellent stunt work and convincing use of CGI, also the acting here is surprisingly deep, especially for a Marvel movie, with several cast members giving passionate, convincing performances. While the action and humour that we have come to expect from a Marvel movie is present here, this film definitely does take on a darker tone in a few sequences and it also questions the idea of superheroes as a concept, there is not only a physical battle present in this movie, but also a psychological one as well as a socio-political one.

The score is used well, there is actually not too many songs present and the score is mostly made up of orchestral instrumental pieces, which also tells you something about the tone of this movie in comparison with previous Marvel films. The editing is also good, snappy enough to keep a consistent pace, while being clear enough to still tell a comprehensible, cohesive story.

Okay it is becoming difficult to continue writing this review without spoiling the movie, so I’ll do a quick summary then I will delve into spoiler territory. This is probably the best Marvel movie to date. It works as a sequel to Captain America Winter Soldier, it works as an ensemble Avengers piece, it works as a sufficient introduction to several new characters and it also blends the more serious tone of previous Cap movies with the more light hearted tone we have previously seen in the Avengers movies. It is a well told, tightly woven story, that still feels large in scope, which is not an easy thing to achieve, *coughs* Batman V Superman, *coughs.* While it’s not what I expected to get when they told us they were making Civil War, it is still a fantastic comic book movie, 9/10.

Okay, spoiler time. This movie came out in the UK a week before it did in America, so I have had the opportunity to see it twice so far. However, I am very aware that this movie isn’t opening in America until May 5th, so I do want to make it very clear that if you haven’t seen the film yet, you really should before reading the rest of this review.

They absolutely nail Spiderman here, in every way. He is the most faithful adaption we have had on the big screen to date, Tom Holland was the perfect choice and it there is no doubt that this young actor clearly has a very bright future ahead of him. Aunt May is played by Marisa Tomei in the film and because she is so young compared to comic book Aunt May, I did initially have my doubts, but she also nails the small role that she has here. The suit is also awesome and after seeing Civil War, I honestly cannot wait for Spiderman: Homecoming. Black Panther is another new character that they introduce and do a good job with, they establish him quickly and clearly and from the get go, we understand this character and his motivations for feeling the ways that he does. The other surprise star of the film is Ant Man, who for the first time onscreen, becomes Giant Man and it is epic. This would have been so easy to make cheesy and just have it not work at all, but here it is convincing and very well implemented into the airport battle. The CGI during this scene is also fantastic. The airport scene is also a highlight of the movie, to see all of these characters onscreen together is truly amazing and as comic book fan I was in heaven. I still can’t believe that we got to see Spiderman making a Star Wars reference, whilst he was swinging around Giant Man, the nerd part of my brain went into overload and I physically couldn’t wipe off the massive, stupid grin that was on my face. The final battle is also pretty cool.

The third act starts off with Tony Stark deciding that he may be wrong about Bucky and that it wasn’t him who set off the bomb in Wakanda, so he, Bucky and Cap team up again to go and confront Zemo, but then the three are shown a CCTV tape from one of Bucky’s past missions, which reveals that it was in fact Bucky that killed Tony’s parents when he was being mind controlled and that Cap knew about this the whole time. This results in Tony being overcome with rage and attacking Cap and Bucky, during the fight he rips off Bucky’s robot arm, but Cap manages to overpower him and he sticks his shield through Tony’s ark reactor, shutting down his suit. We then learn that Black Panther has followed Tony and intends to kill Bucky for setting off the bomb that killed his father, but when he learns that Zemo was behind it, he confronts him and demands an explanation. Zemo tells him that his family were killed when Ultron attacked Sekovia and that he has planned to destroy the Avengers ever since, but because he knew he couldn’t take them down himself, he decided to instead pit them against each other and let them kill one another. Panther then decides that he is sick of seeing people being consumed by revenge and decides to let Zemo live, but Zemo attempts to kill himself anyway, before Panther stops him, telling him that he must remain alive to answer for his crimes. After their fight, Stark tells Cap that he doesn’t deserve his shield, and so Cap drops his shield and helps Bucky out of the bunker. The movie ends with Cap busting his teammates out of prison, where they were put after the airport battle and going into hiding in Black Panther’s mansion house in Wakanda. While the movie is fairly long I did feel that it could have went on a while longer, it’s almost as if the films are at a point now where they know they are going to continue the story in a few months, so they don’t even bother writing a proper ending for the films. This is the only criticism that I have though and like I said we will be getting another Marvel movie in a few months anyway so it doesn’t really matter how this one ends. So yeah, best Marvel movie so far and whether you are a comic book fan or not, this is a damn good time.
  
Crime and Punishment
Crime and Punishment
Fyodor Dostoyevsky | 1866 | Crime
10
7.5 (13 Ratings)
Book Rating
**spoilers**

Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky. read by Anthony Heald.

Genre: Fiction, classic

Rating: 5

Sin, Sentence, and Salvation
The allegory of Crime and Punishment

Crime and Punishment, one of the more famous works of Fyodor Dostoevsky, is considered “the first great novel of his mature period,” (Frank, 1995) and is one of his more famous books, rivaled only by The Brothers Karamazov. What makes Crime and Punishment such a classic? Perhaps because it is a picture of the only classic, and greatest story of all time. Crime and Punishment is an allegory of Salvation.

Self-justified

The main character, Rodion Romanovich Raskolnikov, was a poor student at a university, and was overcome with hate toward an old pawnbroker, and decided to rid the world of her for the greater good of everyone. He believed that she was a “louse,” and since everyone would be happier without her, his actions would be justified. He believed that he had broken the letter of the law only, but that it didn’t have any authority over him anyway because it was written by people just as low as himself. He didn’t believe in God, and in prison he was convinced that he didn’t deserve his treatment, and that it was something he simply needed to get over with. He had no higher authority, so he said “my conscience is at rest.” This is a picture of man before he is touched by the merciful salvation of Christ.

A Troubled Man

Although Raskolnikov justified his actions in killing the old woman, he still felt an overwhelming sense of guilt and fear over what he did. He worked very hard at keeping it a secret, and at first he thought he could live with the guilt that sat in back of his mind, but he was wrong. Raskolnikov had horrible dreams, was always sick, and one of the other characters noticed that he was constantly “set off by little things” for no apparent reason (though the reader knew that it was only because it reminded him of his crime). This represents a man who knows in his heart that he is a sinner, but who will not turn and repent from his sin.

Unending Love

Sonya Semyonovna Marmeladov was the daughter of a drunkard who “took the yellow card” and prostituted herself to support her family. Throughout the book, Sonya began to love Raskolnikov. Eventually, Raskolnikov told Sonya his secret. Sonya was horrified, but still loved him and forgave him after her initial shock wore off. As Raskolnikov was fighting inside with his conscience and his sins, he repeatedly snapped at her, refused her comfort, yelled at her, and so on. He was a bitter, angry, hateful man—and yet Sonya forgave him for everything he did to her, and everything he had done in his past. What redeeming quality Sonya saw in the wretch and why she forgave him, one cannot begin to comprehend; aside from the simple truth that Sonya was a loving, gentile, merciful girl. She saw that Raskolnikov needed someone to love him and she reached out to him, even when he repeatedly pushed her away. Sonya’s love for him is a picture of Christ’s unending and perfect love to His sinful people.

A Silent Witness

When Raskolnikov finally broke down and confessed his crime, Sonya moved to Siberia with him. Raskolnikov expected this, and knew that telling her not to come would be fruitless. She visited him often in prison and wrote to his family for him. But although Raskolnikov expected her to preach to him and push the Gospel in his face, she did not. Sonya followed the scripture’s instruction to Christian wives with non-Christian husbands in 1 Peter 3:1—“ Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives…” The verse tells women to be good examples of Christ to their non-Christian husbands rather than to preach to them and try to convert them, and that is exactly what Sonya did, even though she was not married to him. She did not try to convert him with words; rather she won him with her love. She did not push the Testament into Raskolnikov’s hands, he asked for it. When she did bring it, she did not pester him to read it. She had faith, and showed Raskolnikov the love of Christ through her actions. In the end, it paid off. Although Dostoevsky does not specifically say that Raskolnikov was converted, he does imply that he eventually became a Christian when he mused “Can not her own convictions now be mine?”

The truth will set you free

When Raskolnikov finally realized that he loved Sonya, he accepted that he was a criminal, and a murderer. When he finally accepted that he was a sinner, he repented and had a new life in him. He said he felt like “he had risen again” and that Sonya “lived only in his life.” By life, Dostoevsky refers to his mentality. Before, he had been a living dead man in prison. He was hated by his inmates, was almost killed by them in an outbreak, was unaffected by anything that happened to him or his family, and eventually became ill from it all. But after his resurrection, he repented from his sins, learned to move on with his life, and started to change. He began to converse with his inmates, and they no longer hated him. Sonya was alive in his “life” because of her love for him. When he was changed, she was so happy that she became sick with joy, to the point that she was ill in bed. Dostoevsky paints a picture of a redeemed man at the end of his novel—redeemed both by the law, and by God. This picture symbolizes the miracle of salvation through Christ.

An amazing Allegory

Dostoevsky was a wonderful writer because of his use of dialogue to tell the story, his descriptive scenes, his powerfully developed characters, and their inner dialogue. He often times told you that something was happening by only telling you what the character who was speaking at the time said in response to what was going on. For example, if Sonya was standing up, Dostoevsky would write “… ‘hey, what do you stand for?’ for Sonya had stood.”

He also painted such good descriptions of his characters, that by the middle of the book he didn’t have to say that Raskolnikov was musing in the corner of the room, glaring at anyone who was brave enough to look at him, while he stewed in grief under his old ratted cap, because you knew from how well he was described earlier and how well his character was developed from the dialogue, that he was doing exactly that.

His characters are so real, they almost frighten you because you see the things they do and feel and experience reflected in your own life. They are not perfect—in fact they are all incredibly flawed, but they are a joy to read.

His ending is superb, because he closes the story without actually telling you everything. He never says that Raskolnikov was converted, he never says when he got out of prison, and he never says that Sonya and he were married, but you know that it happened. The last scene of the story is so superb, it makes you want to read it again, just to experience the joy all over again.

But what really made Crime and Punishment the classic that it was is the picture of the best story in the world, the classic story of the world, showing through. The story of the Gospel, of Jesus Christ’s unending love and sin and salvation is clearly portrayed, and makes a joyous read.

Works cited:

Quotes are from Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky, 1886

Frank, Joseph (1995). Dostoevsky: The Miraculous Years, 1865–1871. Princeton University Press. ISBN 0-691-01587-2. (source found and taken from Wikipedia.com)

1 Peter 3:1 New International Version of The Holy Bible

Audio review: I had a hard time reading the book, simply because it was so huge that it was intimidating. I bought (ouch) the audio book of Crime and Punishment, recorded by Anthony Heald who did a fantastic job reading. His voices for the characters perfectly matched them, he felt for them, and he acted them. None of them were cheesy (yeah you all know how lame some male readers are at acting female voices). He read fast enough that the story didn't drag at all, but not so fast that you'd feel like you'd miss something if you didn't listen hard. I will definitely re-listen to the audio book.

Content: some gruesome descriptions of blood from the murder

Recommendation: Ages 14+
  
Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens (2015)
Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens (2015)
2015 | Action, Sci-Fi
The Force is strong in this one...
Like so many of us, I had theorised what would happen in this movie based on the influx of teaser trailers online, and I'm happy to say, I was wrong on nearly everything! I like being surprised, and this film was just that. A very pleasant surprise. It's Star Wars, like Star Wars should be. Not too heavy on the CGI, plenty of action interlaced with character-driven dialogue and sub-plots, and yes, someone says "I have a bad feeling about this..." which is just ace!

So, the story. (No spoilers here, promise!) We join the action some 30 years after partying with the Ewoks on Endor. The Empire is no more, yet, like an evil phoenix, The First Order has risen from its ashes and is doing much the same thing—being awful to everyone and trying to rule the galaxy. Same old, same old.

There are plenty of new faces—the three main ones effectively being modern-day retellings of our old favourites. First up is Oscar Isaac's excellent Poe Dameron, who is this year's Han Solo. A hot-shot rebel fighter pilot, with rogue-ish good looks, a cheeky grin, and wise-cracking dialogue.

Then, we have the Stormtrooper with a conscience, played by John Boyega. A really good performance by him, and despite his character’s beginnings, it doesn't take long for you to genuinely care what happens to him. He's this year's Luke Skywalker, definitely.

And finally, there's the mysterious Rey, the tough-as-nails tomboy who's hotter than you first realise, brought to life by the uber-talented, destined-for-great-things, Daisy Ridley. Not much is known about who she is, but she's this year's Princess Leia, without a doubt.

And that was the first thing that really struck a chord with me—how the film acknowledges the original characters, but gives them a twist for the newer, younger audience. The comparisons are immediate and obvious, but they work. Instead of the kick-ass princess, you have the hard-done-by street kid... instead of the teenager dreaming of escaping his dead-end life, you have one who struggles to accept he's not meant for the exciting one he has. Kids today will relate to these things, yet the film manages to keep the essence of what made the main characters from the classic films so memorable.

We also have the new lovable droid, BB-8, who, like R2-D2 so many years ago, unwittingly finds itself with a garbled message in its memory banks, and in the possession of one of our heroes.

In much the same way that Episode IV didn’t hang about getting Darth Vader on the screen, it's not long before we're treated to our first look at the big bad—Kylo Ren. Let's run through the checklist:

• Looks cool wearing black? Check.
• Masked, with scary voice? Check.
• Mean? Check.

So, Mr. Ren starts out doing everything we would expect, which is nice. We know he's working with The First Order, we know he's looking for something... so far, so Star Wars.

The film moves along at a good pace. Plenty of action and fighting, slowed down by great interaction between the main cast where needed. Then we start getting drip-fed the old-timers, which is where the fanboy in you will get really excited. We first get a look of Han Solo and Chewbacca, which we already knew from the trailers, when Han says, "Chewy, we're home." Harrison Ford steps back into the role like putting on an old pair of shoes—a little awkward at first, but you soon remember how comfortable they are, and you're off and running in no time. It's almost like he's not played any other part since 1983 (and after Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, I bet sometimes Mr. Ford wishes that were the case!). Accompanied by his long-time friend, he effortlessly goes through the motions as the scoundrel looking to make some money, but always ending up owing someone more than he has.

It's not long before a twist of fate puts him and Chewy alongside our new heroes, and they're on their way to see another familiar face, Princess Leia. Except she's not a Princess anymore, she's the General of the Resistance. I won't say too much about her, as her parts in the film are integral to the main storyline, and I don't want to ruin it. Suffice to say, like any couple reuniting after 30 years, her and Han are a joy to watch on screen together.

I don't want to delve into the storyline too much, because a) you've probably pieced together the gist of it from all the trailers, and b) it's hard to do without telling you things you won't know if you haven't already seen it. So I'll leave it there, but will finish by saying it's a pleasure from start to finish, it cues up the inevitable sequels well, and it does nothing more than what it should do—it gives you a Star Wars experience that leaves you wanting to watch it again the moment it finishes.

So, the downsides. There aren't many, but, for me, there are some. They don't take away from the movie as a whole, but they detracted from the experience enough to make them worth mentioning, so here goes.

Princess/General Leia - I'm sorry, but poor Carrie Fisher has had so much Botox, I genuinely thought it was a different actress when she first appeared on camera. We see her go through an emotional reunion, some heartache, some humorous banter, some thrilling, edge-of-the-seat action, and a nail-biting, jaw-dropping finale... and not once did her expression change! Probably because it couldn't. She's the only one who looked like they were struggling to revive their character, because she didn't look like a natural, older version of herself… she looked like she was trying to be a younger version of herself, and it made me not want to see her as much as other characters.

Kylo Ren - This guy starts out as being awesome. His mask is suitably evil, his voice is menacing, his lightsabre is just brilliant… But then he takes his mask off. He's doing something (which I won't detail, but is another obvious and much-appreciated nod to the film's predecessors) and he just takes off his mask. Now, no disrespect to Adam Driver, but... have you seen Harry Potter? Well, Kylo Ren, without his mask, kinda looks like he's related in some distant, in-bred way, to Neville Longbottom. He continues with his evil gestures and scary intentions, but without the mask, you just kinda think... Really? Am I meant to be scared here? When I was a kid, Darth Vader terrified the hell out of me! This guy... you could probably flush his head and steal his lunch money, if he doesn't force-choke you beforehand.

I think he’s another Hayden Christensen—horribly miscast for an important role that could’ve defined the right actor’s career. Let's hope it doesn't end up ruining it for him. Should've kept the mask on, Kylo!

Captain Phasma - The name might not mean much to casual fans, but I’m referring to the chrome Stormtrooper who has inexplicably developed somewhat of a cult following since their appearance in the trailers. They’re the tall, imposing, assumed leader of the Stormtroopers, and certainly looks the part. However, that part is so insignificant, it’s like it was written in as an after-thought. The character will apparently play a more significant role in later films, but that’s hardly the point. We first see him at the beginning, and they’re all evil and shooty, which is fine. But then we see him only a couple of times after that and, at one point, he’s taken hostage in possibly the most unimposing, least-threatening way imaginable, and he just goes along with it. What the hell?! Oh, and I say “He”, but the character is actually played by a woman—Gwendoline Christie, the tall, sword-wielding blonde from Game of Thrones. Anyway…

The final thing that annoyed me a little bit is tough to talk about, because it's riddled with spoilers. But I shall simply say this: the way a certain character (who I haven't mentioned previously) was handled could've been done so much better than it was. That's it. I'll say no more. Watch the film, then read this again. You'll know what I mean.

So, to sum up. This is a great addition to the franchise, no doubt. But, forgetting it's Star Wars for a moment, it's simply a great film. It provides everything you would want from this genre, and it leaves you wanting more at the end (with a clear indication it's going to provide it at some point in the future). Now go. Enjoy. Even if you don't like Star Wars, it's worth a watch. Though I'm pretty certain after seeing it, you'll want to watch the others.
  
High Noon
High Noon
2021 | American West, Fighting
Howdy partners, and welcome to the (fictional) state of Saratoga. There’s 4 main posses ’round these parts, and they’re all willing to fight to the bitter end to settle scores and collect gold. Who will y’all side with in this cut-throat town, and who will come out victorious? Only time will tell, and I reckon that time to be High Noon.

Disclaimer: We were provided with a copy of the game for the purposes of this preview. This is a finalized production copy, and the components you see pictured are those you will receive in your own game! Also, we were provided the 4-player starter set – the game is playable with more people when expansions are included. -L


High Noon is a game of action points, grid movement, and fighting, played over a series of 12 rounds, in which players take on the roles of various posses in the Wild West who are battling to collect the most gold in town. To setup for the game, each player selects a posse and receives their corresponding deck of cards, character sheets, and minis. Character sheets are placed in front of each player, and a red Poker Chip is placed on each to track the Health of each character. Setup the map tiles as shown in the rulebook, or players may create their own map layout using at least 7 of the map tiles. Shuffle the Loot decks and place them to the side within reach of all players, and create a pool of Gold tokens and Poker Chips. The Loot Crate tokens are shuffled and randomly placed on the green squares of the board, and then players will take turns each placing 3 more Loot Crates following certain placement restrictions. All minis are placed on their starting squares on the map tiles, players draw 6 cards from their own posse decks, a starting player is selected, and the game is ready to begin!
Each turn is broken into 3 phases: Movement, Action, and Draw Cards. During the Movement phase, players may move any/all of their minis on the map up to the Speed value listed on their respective Character Sheets. Movement is always in straight lines, or can be diagonal. Diagonal movement costs 2 squares of movement though, so keep that in mind! The map tiles have various obstacles as well, and navigating over obstacles costs 2 squares of movement as well. After a player has moved their minis, they now move to the Action phase. In this phase, each individual character of your posse is allowed one action: Play a Card, Loot a Crate, Loot a Body, Equip an Item, Pass an Item, or Drop an Item. To Play a Card, select a card from your hand, perform the action listed on it (either an Attack or Special Action), and discard it. It is important to note that a character may only ‘Play a Card’ if you have one of their cards in your hand! Each posse deck is made up of action cards for the various posse members – so you might not always have a card in hand for every character. In order to Loot a Crate or Loot a Body, your mini must be in an adjacent square to the item to pick it up. Any Loot that is picked up is placed with the corresponding character’s Character Sheet – each character may only hold a specific amount of Loot! Certain Loot items need to be equipped, and thus you may make that character equip an item in lieu of any other actions this turn. Loot cards have various uses: Weapons, Consumables, or Ammunition. These can provide extra Attack damage, Healing powers, or Defense bonuses to characters. Loot is highly coveted!

Passing an Item allows you to hand off Loot between posse members, or Dropping an Item (a free action) removes that Loot from your Character and is discarded. After all of your characters have acted (if possible), your turn then moves to the Draw Cards phase. You will draw 3 cards from your posse deck. Once you have 12 cards in hand, you must discard 3 cards in order to draw 3 cards. You must always draw 3 cards at the end of your turn. The game then proceeds to the next player, and continues as such until the end of 12 rounds. So how do you win? By collecting Gold, of course! And the way to do that is by attacking your rival posses. Any time one of your characters deals at least 1 point of damage to an opponent, you collect 1 Gold token. Any time you kill an opposing character (reducing their Health on their Character Sheet to 0), you collect the amount of Gold listed on the deceased character’s Character Sheet. At the end of 12 rounds, the player/posse that has amassed the most Gold is the winner!

Ok, so I know that seems like a lot, but I promise that the gameplay is pretty streamlined once you actually get going. The Movement phase is very straightforward and simple to perform. The Action phase is logical, and the options are clear. Drawing cards is a no-brainer at the end of your turn. The real nitty-gritty part of play is in the strategy. You earn Gold by dealing damage or killing opponents, so naturally Combat is where the crux of the gameplay is centered. All characters are armed with weapons that have finite range. You may only ever attack opponents who are in direct Line-of-Sight – in a straight line away from you, or diagonally, each square costing 2 squares of range. If an opponent is not in either of those 2 directions from your character, you may not attack them! So movement and character placement becomes a lot more strategic and important in gameplay. There is also the concept of obstacles impeding the attacks of players. It makes logical sense, and I feel like the damage adjustments to incorporate obstacles feel realistic. When a player is attacked, they may choose to play a card from their hand to defend against some of the damage being dealt. As mentioned above, though, a character may only ever play a card that is specified for him! (Ex. Col. Rodgers cannot defend if you have no Col. Rodgers cards in hand) Are you willing to risk your only Leroy Gang card to defend 2 points of damage instead of using it to attack for 3 points of damage on your turn? You have to figure out exactly how to play the combat, and that strategy can turn in the blink of an eye.


Honestly, for me, the trickiest part of the gameplay was keeping track of which character acted each turn. I ended up grabbing some of the extra Poker Chips and placing them on a Character Sheet once he had acted each turn. Not necessarily a knock on the game, just on my inability to control multiple characters I guess! Let me touch on components for a minute. The copy of the game that I received is a finalized production copy. There may be some updates to the rulebook, but component-wise, what you see is what you get. And what you get is pretty great. The posse and Loot decks are nice sturdy cards, and the cardboard chits (Poker Chips, Loot tokens, and Gold) are thick, if not a little too small for my taste. The Character Sheets are big, easy to read, and clear in their iconography. The map tiles are some nice thick card stock-like material that definitely will hold up to numerous plays. And the minis. They are so cool! Each posse has a designated color, and they are just fun to play with and move around the board. At first, I found it difficult to tell certain posse members apart, since some of the minis look alike. But then I realized that each mini has a number of nicks in the base to help players identify which mini corresponds to which character. That was definitely a lifesaver for me in my plays. The components make this feel like a luxury game, and that helps make it more exciting to play!
So all in all, how does High Noon fare? In my opinion, pretty well! The map grid and combat are reminiscent of Dungeons and Dragons, but with a Wild West theme that feels novel and unique. And according to the box, it can be played with more than 4 players if you incorporate expansions into the base game. So you can really turn this into an all-out Western showdown! The gameplay is smooth, the strategy ever-changing, and the concept and rules are fairly simple to learn and teach. High Noon definitely gets some high marks from me!
  
Magical Friends and How to Summon Them
Magical Friends and How to Summon Them
2022 | Fantasy, Racing
If there is one game theme that will never get old for me, it’s fantasy. Something about a world of magic and magical creatures is fascinating to me, and I will never turn down the chance to play any sort of fantasy-themed game. So when I came across Magical Friends and How to Summon Them, I was immediately hooked. Does the gameplay live up to my expectations of what a great fantasy game should be, or does it miss the magical mark?

Disclaimer: We were provided with a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this preview. The components pictured are not finalized, and could change after a successful Kickstarter campaign. I do not intend to rehash the entire rulebook, but rather provide a general overview of the rules and gameplay. For more information, head to the Magical Friends website. -L

Magical Friends and How to Summon Them (referred to as just Magical Friends from hereon out) is a strategic game of card drafting and variable turn order in which players take on the roles of mages attempting to summon the most magical creatures to the local tavern in order to win the Midsummer festival competition. Played over 8 rounds, players will take turns summoning creatures, moving them towards the tavern, using special creature abilities, and occasionally fighting off your opponents’ creatures. The player who gets the most creatures to the tavern by the end of the 8th round is the winner! To setup for the game, lay out the main board and summoning board in the center of the table. Take the 4 double-sided map tiles, randomly choose a side, and place them in their corresponding places on the main board. Shuffle the Summoning cards and reveal a number of cards, determined by player count, to create a market row and preview row. Each player receives a player mat, heart tokens, and Artifact Cards in their chosen color. Place the round marker on Round 1 of the main board, select a player to get the starting player token, and the game is ready to begin!

To start a round, first you will need to determine turn order. Each player has an identical deck of 11 Artifact Cards, numbered 1-11. The player who offers the most powerful (highest number) Artifact gets to act first in the round. The player with the starting player token chooses their card first, and places it face-up on their player mat. The next player, in clockwise order, will do the same. Here’s the catch though – once a number has been played, it cannot be played by anyone else for this round! So say I put choose my value 8 card – no other player may choose that card for this round. Once all players have chosen their Artifacts, determine the turn order for the round. The player with the highest valued Artifact goes first, then the next highest, and so on.

Once the turn order has been determined, it is time for players to take their turns! On your turn, the first thing you will do is to select a Summoning card from the Summoning board and take it into their tableau. The selected card tells you which friend (creature) you have summoned, and tells you how many moves/what types of movement you may take this round. After choosing your Summoning card, you will take any/all of the following actions: Summon a friend (bring its standee into play), use basic movement (as determined by your new friend), use bonus movement (from other cards), or use the abilities of any friends in your tableau. You may perform as many of these actions as you want and are able to perform. It is important to note that each friend may only use one basic movement and one bonus movement per round. So you can’t just move a single friend with every movement available in one turn.


Once you are finished performing actions, you will end your turn. Refresh the Summoning board by shifting cards down and refilling any empty creature slots. Play then moves to the player with the next highest valued Artifact card. When all players have taken their turn, the round ends. Move the Round marker up one spot, and pass the starting player token to the next clockwise player. A new round will then start with the turn order determination, beginning with the new starting player. After 8 rounds of play, the winner is crowned. Players score points for the number of their friends who reached the tavern, and the player with the highest score wins!
I’ll come right out and say that I really have enjoyed Magical Friends. There are lots of elements that I like and that work well together to create a fun, strategic, and engaging game. First, turn order determination. I love that the turn order isn’t set for the entire game, because that could really be a detriment to whomever would be last every round. Being able to ‘bid’ for turn order, in a sense, allows players to be proactive (or conversely, reactive) with their strategy. And after you’ve used an Artifact card in a round, it is discarded and cannot be used for the rest of the game. So you need to decide when it’s worth it to play your high value cards to hopefully act first, or if you’re willing to risk playing a mid-value card that might be out-bid by an opponent.

The other awesome strategic element are the friends in the game. Each friend is a different creature with different movement options and special abilities during gameplay. An important thing to note is that although every friend has a printed movement value on its card, you may only ever use that value on the round in which you summon that friend. So a Griffin, for example, lets you move 3 friends 2 spaces, which you may do when you first summon the Griffin. But in future rounds, the Griffin will only move based on the movements provided by the most newly acquired friend. Maybe you don’t necessarily want to summon a Mermaid, but the movement she offers is exactly what you need to get some friends to the tavern for scoring. It’s all a neat mix of strategy that you are changing with every turn. Along with the movements, each friend has a special ability that can be used on your turns. Some abilities allow you to move extra spaces, move opponents, or even slay creatures. When you slay a creature, you collect its heart token for endgame scoring, and the player who controlled that creature gets a Pity Power card (which provide bonus movement). You need to decide when to move which friends, and in what order to trigger your abilities. You must always be paying attention to the board layout and your opponents’ turns as they will help you determine your strategy for future turns.


Components. As I mentioned earlier, this is a prototype version of the game, but with that said, the components are pretty nice! The cards are sturdy, the text is clear, and the artwork is fun to look at. The main game board and summoning boards are colorful, and the creature standees are nicely sized for the board. I do have to say that I really like the heart tokens used to identify to whom each creature belongs on the board. The hearts slide over top of the standee and create a base of sorts to color-code every creature on the board. Just a neat little use of components that make the gameplay smooth. And how about the insert? It’s awesome! The standees are all stored, assembled, in a slotted inlay that allows for quick selection of creatures. I hope that’s something that makes it to final production because it really helps streamline the gameplay. Some of the wording in the rulebook could use some clarification, but I know that it is still a work in progress and continues to undergo edits. The only negative I would have to say is that 2 of the player colors are black and gray – and they are sometimes difficult to differentiate between. But changing one color should be an easy fix!
All in all, I was pleasantly surprised by Magical Friends. At first glance, I thought it would be a pretty simple ‘roll-and-move’ type game, but it proved to be much more strategic and engaging than I initially thought. The variable turn order, the movement rules/restrictions, and the unique friend abilities all work together to create a cohesive, thematic, and strategic game. I very much am looking forward to following the progress of Magical Friends and How to Summon Them on Kickstarter, and I encourage you to check it out as well!
  
Mutants
Mutants
2019 | Card Game, Fighting, Video Game Theme
Boy, we have some crazy ideas when it comes to what the world will look like in the future. Flying cars? Probably. Robot house butlers? Maybe. Mutant fighters that can be formed immediately and placed into battle seconds after “birth?” Now, that’s a stretch. But, embrace the stretch here, because Mutants is all about it.

Mutants is a crazy-themed deck building, hand management, fighting, card game for one to four players. Usually in this instance I would put together a Solo Chronicles review, but I wanted to first get the multiplayer rules down and then delve into solo. In any case, this game pits players against each other in a royal rumble where controlling mutants to fight one another most effectively and efficiently will earn the player riches galore. Come check out the world of Mutants.


To setup, well, there are many steps. The biggest and perhaps most confusing step is creating the decks of mutants that will be used by players throughout the game. I will recommend you follow the rulebook for drafting your team, or simply use one of the provided pre-constructed team suggestions. Otherwise, place the main board on the table, along with the power and scoring tokens for each player. Players choose their player board according to color chosen, take their starting deck, and divide their Advanced Mutant deck into three piles, with the top card flipped face-up. Players draw a hand of six Basic Mutant cards (one of each type initially) and the battle may begin!
Mutants is played over five rounds, tracked on the main board. Each round encompasses three phases: Crush the Competition, Move Active Mutant, and Take Action. As the game progresses, the power tokens for players will be moving up and down the Power Track. If, at the start of the current player’s turn, an opponent’s power token is located in one of the last three Power Track spaces (named the Dread Zone), and the current player’s token is on the Fury Space (furthest along the Track), then the current player will score immediate bonus points by Crushing the Competition.

The first turn will not utilize the Move Active Mutant phase, but on subsequent phases, this will need to be resolved. A player’s board consists of three main slots: Left Mutant, Active Mutant, and Right Mutant. Mutants may only enter the Active Mutant slot in the middle, so if a Mutant is currently placed in that slot, it will need to be moved either to the Left or Right slot, at the player’s discretion. Should all slots be filled, one of the Mutants will need to be moved off the board to make room for the new one. Once this happens, the Mutant’s Leave Ability (at the bottom of the Mutant’s card) will activate. This could give the player more Power, some Attacking abilities, or other unique abilities. Once a card leaves their slot and applies their Leave Ability, it is placed in the Discard space at the bottom of the player board.

Now that the Active Mutant slot is available, the current player may choose from one of the Take Action choices: Deploy Mutant, Breed, or Incubate. To Deploy Mutant, simply play a card from hand to the Active Mutant slot, activating the Deploy Ability once placed. These Deploy Abilities could range from cycling (draw a card from the deck and discard a card from the hand), gaining Power, or even reactionary abilities. Breeding Mutants requires the player to discard two cards from hand whose type icons match those of one of the face-up Advanced Mutant cards atop the player board. Discarding these cards allows the Advanced Mutant to enter play on the Active Mutant slot. Finally, the player may instead choose to Incubate an Advanced Mutant from one on offer by discarding one card (and it does NOT need to match icons) and placing the chosen Advanced Mutant on the Incubator slot on the left side of the board. These incubated Advanced Mutants will be placed atop the draw deck at the end of the round, so it will be drawn during the next round.

If at any time a player needs to draw a card from their draw deck and there are no cards remaining, they will first choose a card from their Discards to Freeze, by placing it in the appropriate Cryo Freezer on the right side of the player board. Frozen cards will be scored at game end, and can really boost a final score.

At the end of the round players will perform a few more tasks and setup for the next round. First, the Power Tokens are scored according to which is in first place along the Track and so on, using the red and black VP numbers printed on the main board. The round marker is advanced one level, and each Mutant in Incubation is moved to the players’ draw decks. Players then draw a new hand of six cards, and Power Tokens are reset according to the previous round’s placement, in reverse order. The player whose Power Token is now furthest behind will be the starting player for the next round.


Play continues in this fashion of moving Mutants around, taking actions, and jockeying for supremacy along the Power Track until the end of the fifth round. At that time, the final VPs are awarded for the Power Track placement, and all cards in the Cryo Freezer are tallied. The player with the most VP at the end of the game is the winner of Mutants!
Components. Okay, I have some thoughts here, and more than just, “oh hey, they are nice.” The game comes with a bevvy of cards, some wooden tokens, and a couple “boards.” I used quotations because only the main board is an actual board. The player boards are slick cardstock and, while functional, feel a little cheap. The cards themselves are all super great and the artwork is appropriate and quite excellent. I have a couple issues with some other components, however. The Power and Score Tokens are the only wooden components in the box and I just do not understand them. They look like Sauron/Spartan helmets, or someone who is crying because they just shoved a fork into the power outlet. Now, there are four of each type in different colors, and though the colors aren’t the primary colors we have grown to accept for our player colors, they have swapped out the green for purple, and I think the game is colorful enough to include more exciting colors. So I’m not a fan of the Power and Score Tokens. Similarly, I don’t really understand the insert that comes with the game. I see that it is setup to hold TONS of cards, and maybe there were/are plans for many many expansions, but the base game can be housed in two of the 14 total card slots provided. Also, I have no idea what is going on in the middle of the insert, but I also don’t own any of the expansions yet, so hopefully those molded spots are actually meant to hold something. Everything else, though, is great!

For me, art and components are very high on my list of items that affect how much I enjoy a game. Now, I can live with the wonky Power and Score Tokens, and I suppose I don’t mind carrying around a giant box of cards, when the game could ALMOST fit inside a box the size of Bohnanza or Point Salad or the like. That said, I have definitely enjoyed my plays of Mutants. The rulebook is a little daunting at first, mostly because the theme is unique and the game style is similarly different to me. Once the game gets into the thick of it, though, strategy and tactics take over so strongly. Each card is carefully considered for its usability as either a card to be played or discarded for varying effects. I love that about this game.

This is certainly more than a “deck builder,” even though deck building and hand management are at the forefront of the mechanics here. You aren’t necessarily building your deck and cycling through it quickly enough for me to consider this a true deck builder alone, but using each card for different purposes certainly increases the replayability with Mutants. When is the best time to freeze a card versus keeping it in the deck for its abilities? Do I move off the Left Mutant or keep it around for another turn? Why did I pick these Advanced Mutants during the draft, when I have crappy supporting cards? Every play of Mutants has been a wonderful challenge of maximizing my deck and choosing just the right opponents to attack with my monstrous creations. Purple Phoenix Games gives this one a horrifically delightful 5 / 6. I hate having to bling out my games, but I think I will probably try to find replacements for the Power and Score Tokens (though maybe a little spray paint will help?), and look into grabbing one or all of the expansions so that I may be able to fill up that confusing insert. I look forward to my next games of this, and to getting the word out on this little gem I finally tried.
  
Shadows & Dreams
Shadows & Dreams
Alexis Hall | 2014 | LGBTQ+, Paranormal, Science Fiction/Fantasy
1
5.0 (4 Ratings)
Book Rating
Review** spoiler alert ** *Warning: contains spoilers, bad words, and quite a long rant*


To be honest, I was very disappointed in this book. It had a great premise, which meant it had the potential to be a really good story, but the writing style of the author just completely ruined this book for me.

The basic idea behind the story is that Kate Kane, a paranormal PI, sets off on a case to find the brother of a woman she slept with once, and during this investigation, she runs into ALL MANNER OF TROUBLE. There are vampires and werewolves and ex-girlfriends around every corner, just lurking and waiting to pounce on Miss Kane. It's a very busy and involved story, and if it had been better written, I would have easily given it four stars at least, but there was just TOO much about this book -- style-wise -- that drove me insane.

For instance:

1. The plot, itself, is actually fairly well thought out and developed and is nowhere NEAR as cheesy as it sounds when you hear, "Vampires fighting werewolves," -- which, let's be honest, these days is so trite and overdone that it is scoffed at on a regular basis. However, there IS a good story in this novel. But the way Hall writes the not-cheesy story is so cheesy that it makes you THINK the story is cheesy. A lot of cheese, huh? A little confusing? Well then, let me give you an example.

Page 7-8: "Truth be told it was a little bit awkward, but my social weirdness threshold has gone way up since my girlfriend tried to murder my ex-girlfriend because her ex-girlfriend tried to murder her."

Okay... a bit ridiculous, especially seven/eight pages in, but I can roll with it. However, at the bottom of page eight:

Kane asks, "Who saw him last?"
Her assistant -- who is actually a statue brought to life and gifted to Kate by a group of rats who are apparently all seeing and all knowing God-types -- says, "I don't know. [...] Probably somebody at the hospital."
Kane asks, "Which one?"
And the assistant replies with this fantastic line: "The Whittington. He broke his leg changing a light bulb. Because he was standing on a swivel chair because he's an idiot."

Okay, I concede that maybe this line is supposed to sound ridiculous and funny, so I can even let that one slide. But then, three pages later, Hall completely turns me off to the book with this:

"Well, fuck. I was about to be hired by a woman I'd very nearly slept with to find her missing brother who was working for the woman who'd left me for a tech startup at the tech startup she left me for."

Wh-wh-what?! Are you kidding me? Could that sentence BE anymore convoluted or that plot-point any more ridiculously stereotypical?

And what is truly awful is that the story itself REALLY WASN'T THAT BAD. I mean, the writing was awful, which, overall, meant that the novel was -- in my opinion, of course -- bad, but the way the story progressed WAS interesting. It was nowhere near as bad as these 'recaps' by the main character make it sound, but the problem is that Hall throws in these inner-monologues for Kane ALL throughout the book, and they are terrible! Which, in turn, decreases the value of the entire story.

Another example falls right on the heels of the page 11 jewel.

Page 14: "I really really hoped this wasn't going to be another zombie plague. There'd been an outbreak when I'd taken Eve up to Lake Windermere for our third anniversary, and we'd spent the whole weekend under siege in the hotel, making molotovs from the minibar and clubbing re-animated tourists to death with souvenir walking sticks."

Really? Zombies now? On top of the vampires, witches, and werewolves? Can we POSSIBLY fit anymore para into this normal?

Enough with that.

Now on to point number 2. The girl on girl sex scenes in this book between sexy, snarky PI and her vampire girlfriend, the Prince (yes, Prince) of Cups, should be hot, right? No. They are forced, fake, and ridiculous. Halfway through the first one, I thought, "Jesus. This isn't lesbian sex. This is lesbian sex if it was written by a man who WISHES he could see some lesbian sex." That was the point at which I decided to look up more info on Alexis Hall, and I found out that he is, in fact, a man, which at least explains the sex scenes.

#3. Speaking of sex scenes, Hall also has this really irritating -- and distracting -- habit of throwing in random, explicitly sexual thoughts at TOTALLY inappropriate times. Right in the middle of the most stressful situations -- being locked up, about to be killed, thrown in prison/on trial -- Kate Kane begins inner-monologuing with herself about how much she'd like to fuck whatever female happens to be standing in front of her. RIDICULOUS! And annoying. Hated it.

4. One of the MOST annoying things about this book, however, was that it was in DESPERATE need of a SERIOUS case of editing. All throughout the book there were glaring errors that any first year college student should have caught while reading. I'm willing to discount SOME of these "errors" as simply being lost in translation, as the book is written with a British tone, and I am very much American. However, SOME of these errors simply CANNOT be due to anything other than careless editing.

For instance, page 113: "It's main distinguishing feature, right, was that was it was blue."

WAS that WAS it WAS blue? What does that even mean? Oh, yes, it means that no one bothered editing this beast before printing.

Page 141: "Piercing the heart will paralyse, but it won't kill, and anything will do, it doesn't have to wood."

Okay, so maybe the "paralyse" is simply British, but surely the "doesn't have to wood" bit needs a "be" in there somewhere, right?

Page 157: "Have we have achieved case closed, Miss Kane?"

Yes, yes have we have.

There are several -- SEVERAL -- more examples of these type errors, but I'm not about to point them all out. If you read the book, I'm sure you'll easily catch them on your own.

5. Another thing that drove me NUTS was the repetition. The awful thing is I'm fairly certain that Hall used these repetitious lines PURPOSELY to create some kind of effect -- humor, maybe? Whatever the desired result, it failed to do anything other than annoy me.

For instance, page 163: "'Hi. So. Look.' I tried to find a way to express the fact I had some good news and some bad news that wasn't I've got some good news and some bad news. 'I've got some good news and some bad news.'"

...blink... ...falls over...

Page 177: "All the more reason to tell them. [...] If they know that we know that she has returned, then they will not be tempted to conspire against us out of the false belief that we do not know. Of course, they may already know, but at present, we have no way to know what they know. If we tell them, we will know what they know, and all we will not know is how long they have known it."

Oh. Jumping. Jesus. On. A. Pogo. Stick. Please tell me you aren't serious.

And there was this one thing that repeated over and over again throughout the book. The first time, it was actually pretty clever. The second time, even, was okay. But by the time I'd read it nine times -- yes, NINE TIMES, no exaggeration whatsoever -- I was ready to never EVER read anything like it ever again.

This particular phrase was something Kate Kane internalized or muttered aloud to herself each time she decided to do something stupid OR she felt her life was in danger. The basic format went something like this:

"Here lies Kate Kane, died peacefully in her sleep aged 94. Beloved daughter."

The "Here lies Kate Kane" part remained constant, as did the "Beloved daughter." It was only the middle part that changed, for instance, "Here lies Kate Kate. Should have minded her own business. Beloved daughter." Or perhaps, "Here lies Kate Kane. She made a difference to dozens. Beloved daughter."

This continued NINE TIMES. It is not cute, funny, or clever after about the second time, definitely after the third. BUT NINE TIMES?! Come on!

And finally, my last complaint.

6. Several of the items, scenes, quotes, etc. in this book seemed waaaaaaaaaay too close to things from other books for my taste. Perhaps it is simply a coincidence and the author did not intentionally siphon plot points and details from other authors -- except, of course, when he obviously did in his quotations, such as his use of "Not all those who wander are lost" and "As old as my tongue, a little bit older than my teeth" which are DIRECTLY taken from other books, but I'm hoping those were intentional and not attempted-to-get-away-with-it plagiarism.

But there are several things in this novel that could have been taken from Jim Butcher's "Dresden Files", Lewis' "Narnia" chronicles, and Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings" series. I'm hoping, however, that they weren't, but they were very, very similar.

All in all, I'm disappointed to say that I was not a fan of this book at all, and I will most likely not be reading anymore Kate Kane books.