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Posthuman
Posthuman
2015 | Adventure, Dice Game, Exploration, Fighting, Science Fiction
So many storytellers have attempted to predict, or at least depict, the future of humanity. Many assert that a cataclysmic event will trigger some dark post-apocalyptic culture of humanity’s last breath on Earth. Others would have us fleeing to the stars to colonize and begin our species anew. But what if the former was correct and instead of becoming X-Men humans would rapidly mutate and become… something else entirely?

Posthuman is set in that dark post-apocalyptic horrorscape and is an exploration adventure game with character upgrading and dice-driven combat. The twist here is that humans are trying to escape the mutant creatures to The Fortress, a safe haven for all, but once infected may turn mutant and also turn on the party to prevent that glorious end. In this review, however, I will be playing through the solo rules, and they do not have players turning into mutants during the game. Bummer, eh?

DISCLAIMER: We are using the Kickstarter Deluxe version of the game. We do have the Defiant expansion from the KS campaign, but will not be using it for this review (I don’t think). Also, we do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rule book, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy from the publisher directly or from your FLGS. -T


To setup consult the rulebook, as there are so many decks of cards and character setup steps that need to happen that I just cannot detail here. Once setup your play area will look something like the photo below. Once setup is complete you are ready to begin your journey to The Fortress.
Posthuman is played over a series of rounds until the player wins or loses. The only way to win is to enter The Fortress before the Event deck runs out, and obviously the only way to lose is to run the Event deck out of cards or become a mutant by suffering five scars.

A round consists of several phases. The first phase is Event Resolution. The player will flip the top Event card and resolve its text. These Events could be a one-shot bad (or good) thing for the player, or may be an ongoing Seasonal Event that will stay in play until another Seasonal Event is drawn.

After the Events, characters will need to Eat to survive. Characters will be able to forage for food in a subsequent phase, but know that food is very important and if characters go too long without eating they will be suffering penalties of their Health and Morale.

Once fed (or starved, I suppose), the player will Declare an Action from the following: Camp, Forage, Scout, or Move (in multiplayer there is an additional action as well). To Camp players will forego any other action to heal their character. When a character Forages they will flip the current tile’s marker to show it may no longer be foraged and draw a Supplies card to see what supplies they will be able to gather. These could be more food tokens, ammo, equipment or weapons. To Scout a character will draw terrain tiles equal to the number of exits shown on their current terrain tile. The player will place the tiles however they want and this will provide insight into future locations and what they may hold. Lastly a player may Move into a connected terrain tile and begin having encounters upon it.

Most of the action in Posthuman comes as a result of having encounters on terrain tiles. Depending on where the character meeple is located on the Central Board track encounters will be drawn from the level one, two, or three decks and encountered immediately. Most of the encounters are combats, and I could write another whole post on combat, but I will spare you the details and merely say that combat is very involved and encompasses many steps to resolve. At the end of the combat a character may receive the encountered creature card as a VP trophy to be spent later on upgrades. The VP card may also instruct the player to move the meeple one space closer to The Fortress on the Central Board track. The other type of encounter card presents choices for the player to make or stat tests to overcome via die rolls.


Play continues in this fashion until the player wins by reaching The Fortress, or by losing to the forces set against them.
Components. This box is chock FULL of components and they are all super high-quality and enjoyable to play with. I do have a couple issues with some bits. Firstly, the player boards are quite small, and the tracking cubes are not meant for big meaty paws at all. Similarly, the tracking chits to be used for stats on the player board are flimsy and don’t really stay in place too well. Also the game comes with two different shades of gray player meeple colors and NOT a purple option. Shame! Shame! Shame!

When all is said and done Posthuman delivers an exciting experience on the table for a solo player and indulges the player’s need to roll dice on the regular. Just me? Didn’t think so. The combat is great, but I found myself discarding more enemies than defeating in some games and that is quite annoying. One game I refused to Scout at all and that totally bit me in the booty. So Scout, y’all.

Just know that playing this solo is NOT a cakewalk at all. I watched a playthrough video where the host won the game but nearly every roll of the die was favorable and every combat successful. Even still, she nearly ran out of time and lost the game. So games really can come down to the wire. Now, I haven’t really gotten very close to winning yet, but my day is coming!


I like this one a lot, and will certainly be going back to it for my solo plays. I have been playing some really great solo games lately, and I am very thankful for that. Posthuman, however, I don’t think will get much multiplayer action at my house. The rules are plentiful and the people I normally game with do not enjoy rules-heavy games. Similarly, I don’t think the theme is for everyone. I dig it, but different strokes and all. If you are in the market for a new (to you) game that can be played solo or multiplayer with an interesting theme and is pretty difficult, look up Posthuman. Just stay away from the mutants. These do NOT want to recruit you to their school for gifted people.
  
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Bob Mann (459 KP) rated Roma (2018) in Movies

Sep 28, 2021  
Roma (2018)
Roma (2018)
2018 | Drama
“Siempre estamos solas”
Alfonso Cuarón‘s “Roma” has been lauded with praise and award’s hype, and I must admit to have been a little bit snooty about it. A black-and-white Spanish language film with subtitles that – to be honest – looks a bit dreary: can it really be that good? Having now (finally) seen it on Netflix I can confirm that’s a big YES from my point of view. It’s a novelty of a glacially slow film that grips like a vice.

A primer on 70’s Mexican History.
This is a film about ordinary life set against tumultuous times. Set in the Colonia Roma district of Mexico City (if you were puzzled, as I was, where the title came from) it is an “Upstairs, Downstairs” tale of Cleo (Yalitza Aparicio), a maid and nanny to a middle class family in the early 70’s.

There are two intertwined stories here: Cleo’s personal story and that of the family background in which she works.

Cleo has a pleasant enough life working as partners in crime in the household with Adela (Nancy García García). Life is about getting the work done (well, more of less), keeping the four children happy – to who she is devoted – and scraping enough by to spend her downtime with her martial arts boyfriend Ramón (José Manuel Guerrero Mendoza).

Meanwhile the lady of the house Senora Sofia (Marina de Tavira) has an affluent and cosseted lifestyle amid her loving family.

But times are about to change for all of the players, as events – not just the events of the ‘Mexican Dirty War’ of 1971 going on in the background – transpire to change all their lives forever.

A masterclass in framing.
It’s criminal that I wasn’t able to get to see this in the cinema. Since every frame of this movie is a masterpiece of detail. There is just so much going on that your eyes dart this way and that, and you could probably watch it five times and see more. Even the opening titles are mesmerising, as the cobbled floor becomes a screen and an airliner lazily flies across it.

Even major action sequences, that other directors would fill the screen with (“Do you KNOW how much this scene is costing for God’s sake??”), are seen as they would typically be seen in real life – second hand, from a place of hiding. This is typified by the depiction of the Corpus Christi Massacre of June ’71, where the military, and more controversially the elite El Halconazo (The Hawks) of the Mexican army, turned on a student protest. Most of the action is seen as glimpses through the windows by the characters during a shopping trip to the second floor of a department store. How this was enacted and directed is a mystery to me, but it works just brilliantly.

A masterclass in pacing and panning.
One of Cuarón’s trademarks is the long take (think “Children of Men”) and here he (literally!) goes to town with the technique. An incredibly impressive scene has Cleo and Adela running through the streets of the City to meet their lovers at the cinema. It’s a continuous pan that again defies belief in the brilliance of its execution.

Even the mundane act of Cleo tidying up the apartment is done with a glorious slow pan around the room. Some of this panning is done to set the mood for the film (“Get settled in… this is going to be a long haul”) but others manage to evoke a sense of rising dread, an example at the beach being a brilliant case in point.

The cinematography was supposed to have been done by the great Emmanuel Lubezki, but he was unavailable so Cuarón did it himself! And it’s quite brilliant. So, that’s a lesson learned then that will reduce the budget for next time!

A personal story.
Cuarón wrote the script. Of course he did… it’s his story! He’s the same age as I am, so was nine years old for the autobiographical events featured in the film (he is the kid who gets punished for eavesdropping). Numerous aspects of the film are from his own childhood, including the fact that his younger brother kept spookily coming out with things that he’d done in his past lives! It’s a painful true story of his upbringing and of the life of Liboria Rodríguez: “Libo” to whom the film is dedicated.

Where the script is delightful is in never destroying the mood with lengthy exposition. Both of the key stories evolve slowly and only gradually do you work out what’s really going on. This is grown-up cinema at its finest.

It’s also a love letter from Cuarón to the cinema of his youth, a passion that sparked his eventual career. We see a number of trips to the local fleapit, and in one cute scene we seen a clip from the Gregory Peck space epic “Marooned”: the film that inspired Cuarón’s own masterpiece “Gravity“.

A naturalistic cast.
Casting a large proportion of the cast from unknowns feels like a great risk, but its a risk that pays off handsomely, particularly in the case of Yalitza Aparicio, who is breathtakingly naturalistic. Cuarón withheld the script from his cast, so some of the “acting” is not acting at all – specifically a gruelling and heartrending scene featuring Cleo later in the film. That’s real and raw emotion on the screen.

Marina de Tavira, although an actress with a track record, is also mightily impressive as the beleaguered and troubled wife.

Final Thoughts.
This is a masterpiece, and thoroughly deserves the “Best Picture” awards it has been getting. It’s certainly my odds on favourite, as well as being my pick, for the Oscar on Sunday. Will it be for everyone? Probably not.

There are some scenes which feel slightly ostentatious. A forest fire scene is brilliantly done (“Put out the small fires kids”), but then a guy in a monster suit pulls off his head-wear and starts singing a long and mournful song. Sorry?

There will also be many I suspect who will find the leisurely pace of the film excruciating; “JUST GET ON WITH IT” I hear them yelling at the screen. But if you give it the time and let it soak in, then you WILL be moved and you WILL remember the film long after you’ve seen it.

I remain cross however that this was released through Netflix. This is a film that deserves a full and widespread cinema release in 70mm format. It’s like taking an iPhone snap of the Mona Lisa and putting the phone on display instead.
  
Wonder Woman (2017)
Wonder Woman (2017)
2017 | Action, Fantasy, War
“What first attracted you Dr Mann to the movie with the scantily-clad Amazonians?”
Amazonians deliver! And how. The much anticipated new Wonder Woman movie is with us, and for once the film lives up to the wall-to-wall marketing hype.
With a heavy dose of mythology, Diana is growing up as the cossetted daughter of Hippolyta (Connie Nielsen, “Gladiator”), the Queen of the Amazons, on the hidden paradise island of Themyscira. Trained up as a warrior by Hippolyta’s sister, General Antiope (Robin Wright of “House of Cards”), Diana is clearly something special. Her ego is reinforced by the knowledge that she was made of clay with life breathed into her by the God Zeus. It’s enough to turn a girl’s head!

It’s 1917 and the man-free paradise is shaken up when an American spy by the name of Steve Trevor (Chris Pine, “Star Trek: Beyond“) crash-lands in the waters off Themyscira. (And yes… you didn’t mishear me… this film genuinely features a hero with both the names “Steve” and ‘Trevor”). Prince Eric – no, sorry, wrong film – is saved and awakened on the beach by Diana as the others arrive. “Thank God!”, say the Amazonians. “At last, someone to process the 200 year backlog of washing and ironing”!

But Steve (an “above average specimen”, LOL) is not long for paradise as he needs to return to the war with the results of his spy-work: a chemistry book stolen from the gorgeously deformed Dr Maru (Elena Anaya), gas-developer for the evil General Ludendorff (Danny Huston). Seeing Ludendorff to be her God-like nemesis Ares, Diana returns with Steve to the WW1 battlefields with the intent of killing the God of War and so ending the ‘war to end all wars’.

Much ‘fish out of water’ fun is had with Diana meeting civilised London society, although perhaps this section of the film doesn’t quite live up to its full potential: having ice cream for the first time, without any sign of surprise, all she can come up with is an amusing but rather lame “You must be very proud”.
But where the film really accelerates into awesomeness is when Diana reaches ‘The Front’. She emerges from the trenches like some shimmering vision of hotness, to set male and lesbian hearts a flutter. Its the most memorable trench-exit since the finale of “Black Adder 4”, and the subsequent scenes of Diana single-handedly facing the German guns is for me one of the most compelling and enjoyable scenes in any recent DC or Marvel movie.
Holding all this together is the ex-Israeli army-trainer Gal Gadot in the title role. And man oh man, what a Gal! Statuesque, athletic but also sweet, charming and emotionally fragile she completely owns this role from beginning to end. Gadot made a memorable entry in the otherwise poor “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” (#marthagate #neverforget #neverforgive) but nothing prepares you for just how great she is in this outing. In fact, I’ll go as far as saying that this film, although having a UK 12 certificate, is a film of immense danger to heterosexual teenagers of any age (#humor):
All boys will be cast into a lifetime of misery, never able to find a woman that can possibly live up to the impossibly perfect vision of Diana Prince, tearing up the German army with fists and whip!;
All girls WILL BECOME LESBIANS AFTER WATCHING THIS FILM!
Parents: you have been warned! 🙂
Chris Pine – the thinking women’s Chris Pratt – once again proves himself as a talented actor who manages to successfully morph to inhabit the role he plays. Much as he did in the excellent “Hell or High Water“, not once did I equate him to be James Tiberius Kirk after the first 5 minutes.

Effective in supporting roles are David Thewlis (“Harry Potter”) as a ‘helpful’ army bod and an almost unrecognisable Lucy Davis (“The Office”) as Etta, Steve’s comedic secretary. Steve’s rather unlikely sidekicks of Sameer (Said Taghmaoui, “American Hustle“), Charlie (Ewen Bremner, “Trainspotting”) and ‘The Chief’ (Eugene Brave Rock “The Revenant“) all rather fade into the woodwork by comparison.

I saw the film in 3D (“careful now… you could take an eye out with those things”) and very good it was too. Aside from some rather unnecessary Amazonian arrows, its never feels overdone, and elements of it were extremely effective.
Another star of the show is the superb Wonder Woman theme by Hans Zimmer, here rolled out by the film’s composer Rupert Gregson-Williams (“Hacksaw Ridge“). Unfortunately, the rest of the soundtrack is not particularly memorable.
The film shifts into more traditional yawn-worthy ‘superhero finale’ mode in the last twenty minutes, which is a bit of a shame. It’s also really curious that for such a sexually charged film there is an almost complete absence of ‘lurrve’ on show. The one love scene coquettishly fades to a view of the outside window. Was this to protect the film’s family friendly rating (probably) or that the director didn’t want to show her heroine in a remotely submissive position (possibly)? More frustratingly, the morning after there is no mention of it at all! (“Move along, nothing to see here”). I at least wanted some sort of recognition that a human/God liaison had taken place: Steve grimacing a bit when he sits down; or Diana on the blower to Themyscira saying “Yes, you were right Mum. 5 minutes in, and it just snapped clean off!”
I know my friend David Moody (of markanddave vblog fame, and a big DC/Marvel fan) was generally disappointed with the film. Conversely, Amy Andrews from the ever-excellent Oh That Film Blog loved it. I’m with Amy on this one, and greatly enjoyed it as a well-constructed action rollercoaster. The nearly two and a half hours sped by. By the way (and I took one for the team here) there is no “monkey” at the end of the film’s credit to hang on for.
Patty Jenkins (“Monster”) directs and knows the audience she is aiming to please. One can only imagine the empowering impact this film will have on young girls, crossing their wrists to ‘THAT’ music and, in their imagination, casting terrorists into the hell that they should be consigned to. In this week of yet more Isis atrocity in London, Wonder Woman is a role-model we could all stand and salute: “I believe in love” too.
  
Goodnight Mister Tom
Goodnight Mister Tom
Michelle Magorian, Neil Reed | 2014 | Children
8
9.0 (8 Ratings)
Book Rating
In September 1939, as Britain stands on the brink of the war, many young children from the cities are evacuated tot he countryside to escape an imminent German bombardment. Willie Beech, a boy from Deptford who is physically and emotionally abused by his mother, arrives at the home of Tom Oakley, a widower in his sixties who lives in the village of Little Weirwold. The boy is thinly clad, underfed and covered with painful bruises, and believes he is full of sin, a result of his upbringing by his mother, a domineering, insane, God-fearing widow.
"Mister Tom", as William christens his new guardian, is reclusive and bad-tempered, and as such is avoided by the community. Willie lives with him as his Mother wants him to live with someone who is either religious or lives next to a church. Though initially distant, he is touched after discovering William's home-life and treats him with kindness and understanding, helping to educate him. Under his care, William begins to thrive, forming a small circle of friends at school among his classmates including fellow-evacuee Zach. He also becomes proficient in drawing and dramatics. As William is changed by Tom, so is Tom transformed by William's presence in his home. It is revealed that Tom lost his wife and baby son to Scarlatina some 40 years previously, and he has become reclusive because of this.
The growing bond between William and Tom is threatened when William's mother requests that the boy returns to her in the city, telling him she is sick. At first, William thinks this will be a good thing, as he can be helpful to his mother. However, his mother is not pleased to learn the details of his time with Tom, feeling that he has not been disciplined properly. While William has been away, she has become pregnant and had a girl, but is neglecting the baby. After a bad reunion, where his mother becomes furious upon learning the details of her son's life with Tom, abhorring his association with the Jewish Zach among other things, she hits William and puts him in the under-stairs cupboard, chains him to the piping. William regains consciousness briefly to find himself in the cupboard – he has been stripped of his clothes, minus his underwear, and his ankle is twisted. He quietly sobs for Tom, before he falls asleep.
Back in Little Weirwold, Tom has a premonition that something is not right with William. Although he has never travelled beyond his immediate locality, he ventures into London and eventually locates William's neighbourhood of Deptford and his home. He persuades a local policeman to break down the door of the apparently empty home, to be greeted with a vile stench. They find William in the closet with the baby, who had also been locked under the stairs by William's mother and has now died. William is malnourished and badly bruised as he had been locked under the stairs for a number of days. William is hospitalised, but whilst there suffers horrific nightmares and is drugged simply to prevent his screams from disturbing other children. Tom is warned that it is likely that William will be taken to a children's home, and, unable to observe William's distress any longer, kidnaps him from the hospital and takes him back to Little Weirwold.
Back with Mister Tom, William is much damaged by his ordeal and is also blaming himself for the death of his sister as he had not been able to provide enough milk to feed her whilst locked away, and becomes very depressed. Later, when his favourite teacher Annie Hartridge has a baby, William is shocked to learn from Zach that a woman cannot conceive a child on her own, and realises that his mother was having a relationship with a man, even though she had previously told him that it was wrong for unmarried couples to live together or have children together (something which society in general had regarded as unacceptable at this time). Tom is traced by the authorities, who have come to tell William that his mother is dead, having committed suicide. They also offer him a place in a children's home, as they've been unable to trace any other relatives who may have been able to take care of him. Luckily the authorities realise that William has already found a good home and allow Tom to adopt him.
Tom, William and Zach then enjoy a holiday at the seaside village of Salmouth, where they stay in the house of a widow whose sons have been sent out to war. Zach then receives news that his father has been injured by a German bomb in London and he hurries home on the next train saying farewell to all his friends. Unfortunately this is the last time they see him. William later learns that Zach has been killed and is grief-stricken for some time, but his grief is later healed by another recluse, Geoffery Sanderton. Geoffery, a young man who had lost a leg during the war and takes William for private art lessons,recognises the signs of grief and gives William a pipe to paint along with a picture of two smiling young men. One of the men is Geoffery and he tells William about the loss of his own best friend, the other man in the picture and the owner of the pipe. This is when William starts to come to terms with Zach's death. Adding to this, Doctor Little, the village doctor, who was Zach's guardian while he was evacuated, is surprised but pleased when William asks to have Zach's bike. Through learning to ride it, William realises that Zach lives on inside him and he will never forget his wonderful companion that Zach was.
In the months following, William grows closer to Carrie, one of his friends. One night, on returning home to Tom (whom he now calls "Dad"), he thinks back on how much he has changed since arriving in Little Weirwold and realises that he is growing.
Goodnight Mr Tom Wiki.

Goodnight Mr Tom was published by Kestrel in 1981 and later on in that same year in the US by Harper and Row. The book won Author Michelle Magorian the annual Guardian Children's fiction prize. Magorian was also a runner up for the Carnegie Medal. The book has been adapted as a Movie, a play and a musical. The most recent theatrical adaption won the Laurence Olivier award for Best Entertainment.

I came across the book when I was 10/11 years old. I needed the book for English at primary school, since we needed to read the book and complete a series of assignments for our teacher. I have in the subsequent years read and re-read the book. The book is rather good and I recommand it for children from the ages of 9/10 upwards. The book is a good representation of what happened during WW2 in a fictional setting. And William and Mr Tom healing each other from what they both experienced (Tom loosing family to Scarlatina and William being abused by his mother). I give the book an 8/10.
  
Knives Out (2019)
Knives Out (2019)
2019 | Comedy, Crime, Drama
Murder mystery films tend to be more fun in theory and anticipation than they are to watch. It’s a genre that I very much enjoy and have indulged in over the years. Yet, if I look back in detail at it, I find that it is the books, especially those of Agatha Christie, that I like much more than anything lasting a couple of hours on the screen. There’s something about the mystery being rushed and squeezed into the cinema artform that is usually anti-climactic or even a full on let down.

Perhaps my favourite of the entire genre is a film that refuses to take itself seriously and is at once a pastiche of the multiple cliches that have accumulated over the years. And that film is, of course, the wonderfully camp, funny and charming 1985 romp Clue, starring Tim Curry and a slough of 80s B stars having the time of their lives. It isn’t a “good” film, it is a cult film, it’s joy being in its absolute lack of pretension or moral judgement. Like the board game that inspired it, it isn’t overly complicated or long, but has just enough cleverness, mirth and ambiance about it to always be a winner.

Rian Johnson’s take on the genre, Knives Out, is aware of these elements at all times, being above all things colourful, playful, arch and glib, but never convoluted or cerebral in an alienating way. He is something of a master at subverting a genre and wringing new life into it; take the invention of the teen noir in Brick, or the blend of assassin time travel sci-fi in Looper. He even gave an entire franchise a new breath of life by re-examining the use of humour and self referencing in Star Wars: The Last Jedi.

All of those previous films have as many detractors as mega fans, proving his style is devisive, for its audacity and its irreverence towards any idea of purism within an established model. And Knives Out is no exception to that. However, it may be the film of his that most people can agree on that they enjoyed, for one reason or another. I think it’s as interesting to ask why that is as it is to talk about the film itself… so, I will. At least, I’ll try to do both without losing my train of thought.

Firstly, it looks stunning; the palate of rich colours used in the poster and all marketing just make it look like something you want to immerse yourself in – every jacket, tie, dress, or piece of furniture is designed to precision, and it works like a dream of the genre you may have once had, as if it had been plucked directly from your subconscious. As in all good murder mysteries, the location, props and costumes should hold as much character as the actors, and the stately home of the Thrombey family certainly provides plenty of atmosphere in every texture and material on display.

Of course, the cast of characters is wonderfully put together with some inspired casting of familiar faces and actors you trust, such as Toni Collette and Michael Shannon, together with a few we don’t see enough of these days, such as Jamie Lee Curtis and Don Johnson, who both manage to create something as memorable as anything they did in their golden days. Add to the mix two bone fide action film superstars in Daniel Craig and Chris Evans, who leave the baggage of their most famous characters far behind and manage to convince you they are real actors again, the former with the aide of a jarring but hilarious Southern drawl, that grates at first but is a perfect choice on reflection.

Then there are the two lynchpins of this film’s ultimate success and joy: the exceptional legendary gravitas of 90 year old Christopher Plummer as the patriarch and victim at the centre of the intrigue, and the quite glorious revelation of Ana de Armas, whose charisma, beauty and skill in this delicately balanced role was the most impressive thing for me about the whole production. It may be Craig who is the ever present focus, as the detective tasked with solving the “crime”, but it is de Armas that you will remember most long after the credits roll.

As for the plot, well… I obviously can’t talk about it without ruining the whole thing. But, I can say that it isn’t far into the intricate web of motives, alibis and secrets before you start to sense this is going somewhere different, even unique. The examination of the relationships and personalities, and the extent to which they each demonstrate greed and selfishness is fascinating, superceding the crime that exists on the surface with a swamp of far seedier and unpleasant goings-on. Craig’s suave Benoit Blanc isn’t so much a detective here as a family therapist, or perhaps a supernatural presence in the style of the old classic, An Inspector Calls. Perhaps, it is suggested, no one completely escapes guilt and shame here… or do they? Are we looking for a murderer, or the only morally good person amidst a pack of dogs?

Another key element is how modern and unstuffy it feels, despite the country house and riches this is no play of manners, quite the opposite – no one here is on their best behaviour for the sake of decorum, and being upper class is an idea played with rather than enforced. The tea and cakes of the classic Christie, such as Murder on the Orient Express is replaced by smartphones and similar trappings, that identify it as definitely 2019 and no period piece. The concerns and themes are very much rooted in our present problems, and for that it engages and resonates in ways a costume drama just can’t do.

Upon finishing it for the first time, you may be thinking “sure, OK, I enjoyed that… but I’m not blown away here”. Then, as it sinks in over coming weeks, you find yourself recommending it to people, and thinking about how good it is in ways you didn’t initially think about. And that is surely why it was so embraced by the critics and paying public alike; it is a likeable, fun film, that can also stand some artistic scrutiny. It isn’t the smartest, or prettiest, or most meaningful film ever made, but it is enough of all three to make it an instant mini-classic, in my opinion.

I feel like there is maybe more to say about it, which is always a good sign, but that will do for now. I’d be happy to discuss it with anyone that feels the need. Or hear from anyone that didn’t like it! It would be interesting to hear that side of it, because I haven’t heard many negative comments on it at all. I don’t think I would defend it as a masterpiece to the end of the Earth, ‘cos it ain’t that good. I’m just hard pressed to find a serious fault. And it’s great when one of those sneaks up on you!
  
Funkoverse Strategy Game: Harry Potter 100
Funkoverse Strategy Game: Harry Potter 100
2019 | Fighting, Miniatures
Because I haven’t given my readers enough insight into my nerdiness, here are a few more things I’m into: Harry Potter, the MCU, and Doctor Who. I also have several Funko Pops! characters somewhere here in this house: the Tenth Doctor, the Twelfth Doctor, Captain America, Ms. Marvel, Ant-Man, and Dr. Strange to name a few. So when I heard that a game was coming out where I could possibly use my Funkos for something other than sitting on my armoire, I got excited. Oh, also it’s Harry Potter themed? COUNT ME IN!

Funkoverse Strategy Game: Harry Potter (which I will now refer to as HP Funko) is a tactics-based strategy game where effectively using Action Points is the determining factor in victory. Each player will take charge of a 2- or 3-character team engaged in one of four included scenarios to gain VP (the awesome teal shards). This is done in different fashions, and for this review we used the “Territories” scenario.

DISCLAIMER: The Tenth Doctor and Dr. Strange are not included in the game, I supplied them. In the box are discs to represent a generic Auror (Ten) and Death Eater (Strange). If you choose to use a supplementary Funko Pop! please know that they may be much larger in size and difficult to maneuver on the board. Also, I will not be detailing every rule in the rulebook as there are just too many. For full rules, download the rulebook today or pick up a copy at your FLGS! -T


To setup follow the instructions in the rulebook and the chosen scenario. For Territories, it will look similar to the setup below, but the characters may not be facing a camera, as mine are. Once the players are satisfied with setup, the first player token is flipped coin-toss style to see which team will lead the first round. The game is now underway!
Turns are somewhat simple: each character can do two actions, which include: Move, Challenge, Interact, Assist, Rally, and Use Ability/Items. Movement is two squares, with diagonals allowed, but not through any part of an obstruction. In fact, obstructions and line-of-sight are big parts of the game, as several pages of the rulebook are devoted to them. To Challenge another character is the combat of the game. The attacker will typically throw two dice to initiate an attack and the defender will use as many dice as is printed on their character card. However, this is a Harry Potter game, so Challenges will also allow characters to use magic spells to augment their attacks or inflict other debilitations or statuses on their targets. Simple majority of successful results rolled wins the Challenge. Characters may be knocked down as a result of a Challenge, and if already knocked down and successfully attacked again, may also be knocked out of the game for a certain number of rounds (usually one).

To Interact with a token on the board a character will need to position themselves either directly on the token or one space adjacent. These tokens could be merely points on the board that earn points, as in the current scenario.

If adjacent to a downed ally, a player could use an Assist action to stand up the ally. However, a character may stand themselves up on their turn by using both actions to Rally. This is the character’s entire turn worth of actions, but may be necessary to avoid being knocked out and placed on the Cooldown Track.

Lastly, characters may need to spend actions to use an ability or an item in their possession. Each ability and item will have its own instructions written on their respective cards. These will be instantly recognizable to fans of the HP universe and will use Ability Tokens or require the user to place the Item Card on the Cooldown Track to be used on a future turn.


After alternating characters on each team has exhausted every character, the round ends. Players will refresh their characters and move all tokens or cards down a space on the Cooldown Track. Should end of turn activities score teams VPs, they will claim the shards for their collection. Once the scenario’s objective has been met a player will be crowned victor and forced to cast Riddikulus on their opponent(s).
Components. This game does not ship with a ton of components, but the bits and pieces contained in the box are wonderful. The cardboard map and pieces are nice, the cards are good quality, and all the tokens are great as well. I really enjoy the VP shards and of course the smaller Pops! that are the main characters. They are a bit smaller than all the Pops! I have, but I’m not really a huge Pops! collector, so that may be the norm nowadays. The art throughout is really well-done and evocative of the theme. Overall the components are brilliant.

I am no fan of Mage Wars style games, as I typically find those types of tactical games tiresome. I usually end up just moving around and casting a spell every once in a while, but then it’s just a tedious game of cat and mouse that I just don’t feel like ever playing. However, with the scenarios provided with HP Funko I feel like I have a mission other than knocking out my opponents. Yes, I could still do that during a scenario, but that’s not the main focus. I like that quite a bit. In fact, there are generic tokens in the game that would even allow players to create their own scenarios. I might be interested in creating my own to play with a younger crowd even.

Moving those big heads around is fun and makes me giggle a bit, especially when they knock into each other and fall down because of the elephantitis of the noggin. I also like being able to send in my Tenth Doctor to use his Sonic Screwdriver to take out he-who-must-not-be-named whilst Dr. Strange looks on in amusement. Being able to use your own Pops! is a great twist and I am definitely a fan.

I guess I DO like tactical move-around-the-board-and-do-stuff games after all! I just needed a little direction and a good theme to pull me into the genre. I also have the expandalone for the HP version of this that includes Malfoy and Ron, and can’t wait to add those in as well. And let me tell you how much I need the next expandalone that includes Dumbledore, Hagrid, Snape, and Umbridge. I need, like, I NEED to deal some damage to that pink witch SO MUCH. In any case, Purple Phoenix Games gives this one a patronus-fueled 10 / 12. If you are on the fence about this gimmicky-looking game, then let me help you – get it. Play it a lot and play it with lots of other people (when possible). Extra points to Hufflegriffinsnake if you yell out the spell names a la Harold Potter in the movies.
  
Terminator: Dark Fate (2019)
Terminator: Dark Fate (2019)
2019 | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
Action (2 more)
Performances
VFX
Terminator 3?
I need your clothes, your Re-boot and your motorcycle.

That’s the second l pun I’ve made out of that infamous terminator 2 line this week and I feel dirty because of it;
Dirty, much like how I imagine the Terminator franchise feels after Genisys (or however they spelt it)
 Terminator:Dark Fate however is billed as a follow up to Terminator & T2;
The former an 80’s classic that sparked a franchise & its sequel that has easily landed itself as one of the best sequels of all time.
So you probably know that this one is ditching all those other terminator films that came in the couple of decades that came between & aims to be the definitive third instalment of franchise (for the third time after Rise Against The Machines & Gen-I-size also promised to do the same) and it’s actually succeeds somewhat, but maybe not in the way a lot of die-hards will want it to.

It’s the “Day After Judgement Day” and Dark Fate opens strong; using footage of Sarah Connor’s crazed speech of Judgement day & machines whilst being interviewed by doctors from T2.
you’ll immediately appreciate Linda Hamilton’s presence one again & from the first scene that follows it’s immediately clear that the previous sequels were missing her presence on screen.
We get a very brief tease of that 80’s style future of skulls on beaches and red & blue lasers that you’ve now seen in 6 films before it but This film doesn’t mess about, Judgement Day didn’t Happen, Sarah, John & The T-800 stopped it in terminator 2 and this film wants you to know that.

You see this film takes a huge risk that may divide fans, but imo it’s a risk that needed to be taken;
it’s no longer about John Connor, not anymore.
We’re introduced to Dani Ramos (Natalia Reyes) & her brother Diego (Diego Boneta) as factory workers facing replacement my machines (see what they did there, I’ll forgive it though as it gets good).
Next up is the rather brutal and badass introduction to the new Kyle Reese in the form of McKenzie Davis’s Grace & then a similar although ironically more Graceful introduction to the new Terminator (Gabriel Luna) both coming back in time via the iconic time bubble effect of series has had since 1984.
And he’s The most polite & possibly menacing Terminator since the T-1000…
Yes I said polite but I’ll get back to that later.
This new ‘black metal’ terminator or “Rev-9” as its referred to is a sort of 2 for 1 deal Terminator, like a T-800 and a T-1000 at the same time, able to split up and act independently as liquid and skeleton simultaneously.
Unlike previous attempts though this terminator is genuinely threatening, he isn’t messing around and finds his new target Dani within minutes.
He’s lightening fast, intelligent and creepy.
The VFX on him thankfully holds up as well and look fantastic other than a few shoddy cgi jumps that can be forgiven.

Within minutes we’re into an explosive highway car chase and the action rarely lets up after.
Genuinely… theres a Mexican border assault, a US detention pen riot, a fight on fucking C5-M plane (it’s big) and then some.
The action in this film Is relentless, gripping and satisfying as fuck.
But story itself, is Terminator 1984, again…
New familiar threat from the future under a different name and that’s all that’s really new at its core.
That’s because Terminator Dark Fate actually serves as a Star Wars: The Force Awakens style Reboot.

T2’s Judgement Day didn’t happen, Skynet didn’t happen, Terminators as we know and love didn’t happen…
But eventually another A.I does and forces our incredibly toned soldier & the black-metal Rev-9 to Time Travel back to our present day.

Despite the opening chase echoing T2 this film matches Terminator 1 in tone entirely,
Everything is very desperate and our character are almost constantly on the run. If anything this is a beat for beat remake that also happens to be a sequel by bringing along the old cast (No J.J Abrams was not involved.

The cast are fantastic, every single member, this film is stollen by McKenzie Davis and Natalia Reyes, they own their roles.
Gabriel Luna as mentioned before is fantastically creepy, this terminator has one mission and won’t waste time killing innocent bystanders, he’s even well mannered! Which just adds to the creep factor.
And don’t worry, his eye-rolling one liner of “my whole body is a weapon” from the trailer is thankfully immediately shut down by an extra in the full scene.
As a re-boot these cast need to be the ones you care about. Wether you like it or not this is a passing of the torch from old to new and luckily They deliver.
I cared about them more than I did about Sarah Connor!
Who Now bitter as fuck, as ruthless as ever and making it known that she had nothing in life other than a vengeance for Terminators and a fear of a Judgement Day she’s actually prevented.
Linda Hamilton is also great as expected. Her character being even more cold, cynical and sarcastic than ever and if you think about that’s how it should be. Her presence is essential though and makes it feel like a sequel to terminator 2.

The comedy of T2 is missing until we’re eventually re-introduced to Arnie’s Terminator.
 I genuinely found him hilarious, and his humour it not forced, he’s the most dead-Pan he’s ever been and of course you know that Sarah Connor isn’t going to trust this weirdly humorous rust-bucket.
But his story is quite a hard one to swallow, without spoiling we get an evolution of his character, one that’s definitely an interesting take, one that also create its own Jokes out it. But it’s doesn’t quite land. It’s too much.
That having been said Arnie is also absolutely fantastic with what he’s been given but unfortunately I didn’t care for him as much as I wanted to.

You’ll have questions multiple times throughout this film but thankfully our characters are intelligent enough to ask them before too long whilst the action is unfolding.
The film never hangs around too much and suffers a little for it, the story comes off as very little more than a remake and passing of the torch.
We get the sorry of this new threatening 2042 future via flashbacks (or is it flash forwards? time travel) and it’s grittier than we’re used to.
More in vein of Salvations dusty, military future than the synth wave metal and blue lasers, which is a shame but ultimately makes sense and enforces the idea that the future we saw in T1 & T2 was actually prevented by John & Sarah back in T2.
It’s risky but it’s the deviation from the formulae of the past attempts at a new Terminator that the franchise needs.

Luckily the risks set up also give us an appropriately emotional if predictable ending. There’s just not enough of the touching character development the the first two films had.
The film succeeded in making me care about the new characters but I left feeling like I didn’t get enough despite a bit of fleshing out via flashbacks that unfold as the film progressed.

Tim Miller (Deadpool) has directed one hell of an action film, Dark Fate is a sequel that wipes the slate clean for a future of new terminator films and just about succeeds buy the skin of it’s endo-skeleton teeth.
It’s not the best, it’s essentially the first film again with new and old cast but it’s good enough for a new series to blossom off it and thrill ride for the most part.

There are few questions left for the sequel and three-quel that I know are already planned (what the fuck does Rev-9 actually stand for anyway?) but that’s understandable, I just hope we get that sequel and that it’s as good or even better because this is the only terminator film I cared about since terminator 2.

The box office will ultimately be the decider and I can already hear the keyboard warriors that haven’t even seen the movie panning it on twitter but I for one, really enjoyed Terminator: Dark Fate.

Photo courtesy of Skydance & Paramount VIa talent house media.

7/10
  
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (2019)
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (2019)
2019 | Crime, Drama, Thriller
Leonardo DiCaprio (1 more)
Brad Pitt
It's 2 hours and 41 minutes and feels long. (2 more)
Story elements don't seem to go together.
Charles Manson stuff feels forced.
With Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood being his ninth feature film as writer and director and a career just shy of the three decade mark, you should probably know what to expect from a Quentin Tarantino film. Amongst all of the usual Tarantino trademarks of memorable performances, long strings of dialogue, a questionable amount of dancing, the inclusion of several shots of barefoot women, interior car sequences, and a relentless tidal wave of vulgarity that drowns the audience in a sea of sharp expletives, Once Upon a Time...in Hollywood lacks the one element that truly makes a Tarantino film worthwhile; coherent storytelling.

Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood should be great based on its cast alone. Leonardo DiCaprio delivers one of his more complex performances as television star turned infrequent movie star Rick Dalton. Dalton made a name for himself in a western TV series called Bounty Law. Rick burned that bridge when he tried to make the jump to movies and failed. Now he only seems to get work as the TV villain. Rick gets an opportunity in Rome to star in Italian spaghetti westerns and reluctantly accepts. Rick is an alcoholic that struggles with a stutter when he speaks. He has low self-esteem and questions every decision he makes. The scene where he flubs his lines followed by his angry outburst in his trailer is extraordinary. He’s also the one person on the planet who seems to hate hippies more than Eric Cartman.

Brad Pitt portrays Rick’s stunt double Cliff Booth. Cliff is a Vietnam War veteran who may or may not have (but probably did) kill his wife without any repercussions. Cliff hardly works as a stunt double anymore and mostly makes his living driving Rick around and doing various odd jobs for him. Cliff is the exact opposite of Rick. Rick lives in the Hollywood Hills in a roomy luxurious house with a pool and an extravagant view. Cliff lives in a trailer by a drive-in theater, eats macaroni and cheese for dinner, and has amazing chemistry with his pitbull Brandy. Cliff seems like a handy and capable guy, but he’s also extremely blunt. His to-the-point demeanor keeps Rick’s wilder antics in check the majority of the time. Cliff doesn’t exactly babysit Rick and allows him to live his own life, but he’s the one to give Rick the “you’re better than that,” kind of pep talk after it’s over.

One of the things mentioned in the film by Kurt Russell (he plays Randy and does the voiceover as the narrator) is that Rick and Cliff share this bond that is practically as deep as a brotherhood yet lacks the commitment of a marriage. Their bond is the backbone of the film and it’s interesting because they both seem like half decent people. Cliff may have killed someone and Rick beats himself up harder than anyone else could, but they’re both hard working individuals who put everything into their work and they have each other’s backs through thick and thin. Their bond is almost wholesome to the minuscule extent Tarantino will allow.

Brad Pitt’s chemistry with Brandy is also quite entertaining. There’s something comical about seeing Cliff rummage through his pantry filled with nothing but cans of dog food only to pull out two specific cans; one rat flavored and one raccoon flavored. He opens the cans with a manual can opener, tips them over in mid-air after removing their lids, and lets gravity guide that slop into whatever is designated as a food bowl that particular evening in a sickening PLOP! And a meaty splash that overflows onto the kitchen floor tiles. Cliff and Brandy seem almost as close as Cliff and Rick. They have this partnership that is easy to detect as soon as they’re on-screen together.

Mike Moh’s Bruce Lee impression isn’t totally flawless, but it is fairly excellent regardless. Moh is Korean and Bruce Lee was Chinese-American, so it’s an intriguing fit that works way better than you expect. The scene Moh has with Pitt as Bruce Lee and Cliff Booth have a physical encounter is an entertaining highlight of the film. The outrageous violence you’ve come to expect in a Tarantino film isn’t present in Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood until the final scene and it is a glorious display of dog biting, face pummeling, and flame throwing mayhem. If Cliff Booth hasn’t already established himself as a certified badass through the first two and a half hours, those last ten minutes certainly allow him to obtain that title with ease.

The unfortunate aspect of Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood is that everything doesn’t really come together in a satisfying way. You’ve got a washed up actor trying to regain the spotlight, a stunt double struggling to find work and make a living despite his troublesome reputation, and the Charles Manson stuff with Roman Polanski (Rafal Zawierucha) and Sharon Tate (Margot Robbie) living next door to Rick and Cliff’s time at the Spahn Movie Ranch with the Manson Family. In 1968, Tate and four others were murdered in the home she shared with Polanski by members of the Manson Family while being eight-and-a-half months pregnant. It’s a horrendous statistic that puts a different perspective on the ending if you didn’t know beforehand. The Manson inclusion mostly feels like an afterthought that isn’t ever taken seriously.

So many recognizable names are a part of the cast and everyone outside of Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio are basically a waste. Margot Robbie has a few moments that mostly reside in her reacting to films starring Sharon Tate in a movie theater. Tate seems to represent this pure and positive light in the film while Rick and Cliff experience the uglier aspects of the Tarantino-skewed late 1960s. Robbie downright glows during that movie theater sequence with a bubbly and contagious attitude, but doesn’t do much else over the course of the film.

Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood feels longer than its 141-minute duration. It drags so often in between its enjoyable moments and seems to purposely lag during every dialogue heavy sequence that is just talking without any sort of payoff. Tarantino’s attention to the music of whatever era he’s depicting has always been a staple in his films, but it is on the verge of annoyance here. The dancing in the film feels like an excuse to stretch out the story that much longer for no other reason other than to blatantly rub the audience’s nose in the time period.

There are some masterful elements to Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood that shouldn’t be overlooked. Leonardo DiCaprio’s Rick F’ing Dalton sequence is explosively brilliant and Brad Pitt has this abrasive charm as Cliff Booth. It’s difficult to make the argument that Quentin Tarantino has original stories still worth telling at this point in his career though since this suffers from incoherent progression and a reasonable purpose for why we should care about these characters. At one point in the film, Rick tells Cliff with tears streaming down his face and this unhealthy cough full of cancerous phlegm, “It’s official old buddy. I’m a has-been.” Maybe this is how Tarantino feels about himself now that he’s nearing the end of his filmmaking career. That struggle to find meaning and a welcome audience for something he used to care deeply about but may have lost the passion for in recent years. He had a good run, but as it stands Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood is overstuffed yet bland despite its two zesty leads.
  
Quad City Killers
Quad City Killers
2021 | Exploration, Humor, Murder & Mystery, Party Game
So I am going to cut right to the chase here. I am from the Quad Cities, the area of Iowa and Illinois where the Mississippi River flows East-West instead of its normal North-South. Admittedly, the name given to the area is the Greater Quad City Area and includes around 18 actual towns and cities. I have a love for my hometown and defend it to all who think we are just cornfields and unexciting. That said, when I saw a game was being produced about serial killers roaming my own stomping grounds, I knew I had to preview it.

Quad City Killers (or QCK) is a competitive game of moving around a map and eliminating points of interest by using resources from hand. Or, in actual gamespeak, stalking the streets of the QC murdering prey by using weapons, modifiers, and scenario cards to adjust the winds of chance for success.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and I do not know for sure if the final components will be any different from these shown. Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game, as there are just too many. You are invited to download the rulebook, back the game through the Kickstarter campaign ending March 5, 2021, or through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T


To setup place the large map (an actual map that you would find in your grandparents’ Oldsmobile) on the table. Shuffle the Prey deck and the Resources deck separately and place them in their spots on the map. Place the Heat tokens on the lowest space in each city. Keep the three dice nearby for all players’ use. Each player will choose a serial killer profile mat, a color of skull mover token, and Dexterity token to track progress. Each player will also draw five Resource cards from the deck and one Prey card to place on the board in a city along with their skull mover token. The game may now begin!
The first thing each player will do on their turn is perform a Hunt action by drawing and placing on the map the top card of the Prey deck. Most Prey are color-coded to be placed in a matching city, but some are not and may be placed in any city on the map. Next, the player may perform any three actions from the following: Hunt, Travel, Attack, Scenario, Discard.

Hunt works the same as the action performed at the beginning of each turn: draw a Prey card and place it on the board. In order to Travel to a new city the player will roll the dice. For a value of 1+ the player may travel to any city within their current state. For a value of 2+ the player may cross the Old Man to the other side (preferably using the half-finished under-construction new I-74 bridge). A player may play a Scenario card from their hand, and if it shows the Action icon they will spend one of their three actions to play and resolve it. A player may also choose to Discard two cards from their hand and replace them with cards drawn from the Resource deck for an action.

The game would not be named Quad City Killers if killing was not involved somehow. As the final option of action to be taken on a turn a player may choose to Attack a Prey card in the same city in which the player’s token resides. To Attack, the player will consult the Prey card’s printed defense value for their target number. The player will then combine any Resource cards they may have in hand with their current Dexterity score (tracked on their player mat) and the roll of the three dice. If the end result matches or exceeds the Prey’s defense value the Prey is eliminated. The player collects the Prey card for a trophy and for its Notoriety value (victory points) at game end.

Resource cards come in different flavors: Weapons, Scenarios, Modifiers, and Ego. Weapon cards are just that: weapons. They may be used once for an attempted kill and then are discarded. Scenarios may mess with opponent tactics, allow players to move Prey cards to different cities, or other various activities. Modifiers may also adjust the current Advantage enjoyed by the player or be played on a Prey card to lower its defense value. Ego cards (and also some Weapon cards) will have an M.O. icon on them and may be placed directly on the player mat. These M.O. cards offer a once-per-turn advantage for the player and are very powerful.


The game continues in this fashion of taking turns moving around the map, hunting prey and killing them, and using Resources to adjust the difficulty of the murder. Once a player has increased their Dexterity token to the end of the track the game ends and the players count up Notoriety values (VP) of all slain Prey cards to arrive at the greatest serial killer the Quad Cities has ever seen (which, being from the QC would be saying something – I don’t remember ANY serial killers here).
Components. Okay, this was a super cool game to open up in the mail. Inside the mailer box was this strange Evidence bag. I have never seen an Evidence bag in my life so I wasn’t quite sure what was inside. But when I opened it and saw it was the components for the game I immediately smiled at how cool that was to include. It certainly made an impression. Now, please remember that this is a prototype copy of the game, and the finished version will have slightly different and improved components. That said, what we were provided is very close to final quality (and better than some games I have in my collection!). The cards are all fine, the dice are dice, and the tokens are well-designed and interesting. The best component, for me, is the excellent map of the QCA. It folds/unfolds like an old map would (prior to GPS) and has my hometown right on it! Luckily I live in a suburb(?) of the Metropolitan QCA so my house is nowhere to be found on the map, but it is very strange and exciting to play a game on a map of your home.

The game as a whole is pretty good. Though the estimated time to finish the game is quoted at 90-180 minutes (and maybe with the full compliment of players), my plays with my wife were well under an hour each time. We both enjoyed the game quite a bit once we got over the whole premise of it. The theme is obviously dark and macabre, but in the end it is still just a game.

I felt very engaged for every second of the game as I watched my wife nail roll after roll during her Attack actions while I fail to manage even a roll of 2+. Yes, I am unable to roll 2+ on THREE DICE. My issues aside, the dice really do add a layer of chance (obv) that all the accounting and cardplay just will not cover. I like that. I like chance in my games, even when it goes against me. I also enjoyed having five actions from which to choose three on my turn, but I could also use the same action all three times if I wished. More options is usually good, and having more than one obvious route or strategy is a huge bonus for me.

All in all I really did enjoy this game quite a bit. Again, the theme may be off-putting for some, and I will not play this game with my children until they are probably older than the suggested 13+ but I can definitely see myself breaking this out with a group of adults who are itching for something completely different from what they are accustomed to playing. If you are like me and need something just absolutely jarring in your collection, I urge you to take a look at Quad City Killers, on Kickstarter now until March 5, 2021. Just stay out of Milan (pronounced MY-lin) and we will be fine.
  
Cubitos
Cubitos
2021 | Dice Game, Racing
Let me tell you a story about how I came to own Cubitos. My FLGS, which since moving to Tennessee is an hour away in Knoxville (Sci-Fi City), had great stock of this game a couple months ago. I would step in, browse around, and pass on picking up a copy since they seemed to have so many. Forward in time to a month ago, when I was ready to grab my own copy, they are sold out. WHAT. Well, I had to order a copy online from somewhere I don’t normally shop because my favorite online sellers were also out of stock. Then Christmas came and my brother gifted me a copy of Cubitos. So then I had two. Long story now short – I have a copy and that’s all that matters because Cubitos is amazing.

Cubitos is a push-your-luck, dice building, racing game for two to four players. In it, players have runners that will be moving around a crazy race track, and another runner who keeps track of fans (the manager maybe?), and the first player’s runner to cross the finish line will be the winner! Now, managing movement and special abilities is where the game REALLY is, and it all boils down to which special dice are purchased and used, and whether Lady Luck will find favor or not. It’s a wild ride, so prepare your runner and let’s go!


To setup, place out one of the double-sided Racetrack boards, along with the Fan Track board. Runners for each player are placed at the Starting Line on the Racetrack board, and the other on the bleachers of the Fan Track. Each player receives a color-coded Player Board and nine gray starting dice. They receive a Phase Token to keep track of each phase in a round, and the starting player receives the Start Player Die. Each dice box is placed around the boards with the dice on top. All corresponding cards for each die type is placed by the dice box, and the game may now begin!
DISCLAIMER: We have adopted an unofficial variant/house rule that differs from the rules because we find it works better for us. During the phases where all players may play simultaneously we instead just have each player take a turn individually. -T

A turn in Cubitos is divided into two main phases with several sub-phases for each. During the main Roll Phase, players will first Draw dice from their personal Draw Zone (on the Player Board) and place them into the Roll Zone. Initially, players will have a hand size of nine, but that may be adjusted as the game progresses. Once the dice have been drawn the player then Rolls their dice. Every die face showing an icon is counted as a Hit, and every die showing a blank face is considered a Miss. All dice showing Hits are moved to the Active Zone of the board, and the player then decides if they wish to Push (their luck) and re-roll all the Misses in hopes of more Hits, or if they are done rolling. Once a player re-rolls their Misses, if the result is all Misses, the player Busts and must move ALL rolled dice to the Discard Zone on their board. However, players may continue to roll all Misses until they Bust or are content and stop.

The Run Phase then begins with players resolving their red die icons (crossed swords for attacks), and determining their other icons rolled for coins and movement. Feet icons (and certain dice special abilities) provide players with movement along the Racetrack board, and coins provide the player with purchasing power to buy new dice. Once a player’s Runner has landed on a reward spot on the board, the player receives the benefit and moves all dice used this turn to the Discard Zone on the Player board.


Every time a player Busts, or lands on a Fan icon on the Racetrack, the other matching Runner on the Fan Track board will move one spot along the track, and the player receives the benefits of the new space. These benefits are either an increase in hand limit of dice drawn, or more purchasing power in the form of credits. Reward spaces on the board could give players extra dice for free, allow players to remove dice from their collection, or even gain credits to be used at any time. The game continues in this fashion of each player taking their turns until one player crosses the finish line and wins!
Components. This box is chock full of tasty components that we all just adore. The boards and cards are all good quality and feature some fantastic art, and the custom dice are just so fun to handle. A truly ingenious use of folding arts is used when setting up all the dice boxes. Not only are they used in-game to remind players what icons are on each die face, but they also hold the dice during play, and store the dice in the box. I mean, triple duty dice boxes are where it’s at! Everything is super colorful and just a joy to play with each time. My one quibble is the very offensive block of cheese on the box cover. I am a big Chicago Bears fan, and seeing something so proudly displayed that even remotely resembles an homage to the Packers is such a shame to me. I really hope that wasn’t intentional, but I am also joking. Mostly.

The absolute best part about this game is the selection of action cards associated with each special set of dice. For example, the purple dinosaur dice could be paired with seven different cards, each with different abilities when the icon is rolled. Each color has a seven card deck, from which a card could randomly be used each game. The rulebook also offers 10 suggested combinations of cards, and also invites players to choose their own combos. This reminds me of a similar mechanic I first saw with the Dice Masters system, where each die’s faces could mean something completely different depending on the card associated with it. I loved that mechanic back then, and I do now as well.

I cannot believe I passed on this game for as long as I did. I mean, I like AEG-published games. We have reviewed John D. Clair games positively: Mystic Vale, with Custom Heroes and Space Base coming soon. Was it a subconscious dislike for the dumb cheese man on the cover? I am not too sure, but I am clearly glad to have it now. The cool dice. The interesting theme. The multi-use dice/card components. The fact they included both orange and purple dice. Am I into racing games now? The reasons are plentiful, and I just cannot wait for my next play of Cubitos. Maybe I can get my wife into it and it can be a staple in our rotation.

There are several other little rules that I did not mention here, but all in all I have had a blast every time I play Cubitos. I was certainly correct in wanting to add it to my collection, and having Josh teach Laura and me originally just adds a unique personal touch to the game for me. Creating lasting memories is a big reason I am so into board games in the first place, and I think Cubitos will hold a special place in my heart simply because I was able to play it with my best friends. They agree with me that this is a special game, and Purple Phoenix Games gives this a nonsquare 16 / 18. If you see this at your LFGS I highly recommend you pick up a copy. Don’t wait, like I did, because when you do get around to it, they just may be out of stock. And a suggestion: because the cheeseperson is wearing lederhosen, just refer to them as a great German friend. AND THAT’S IT. Go Bears.