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The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo
The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo
Amy Schumer | 2016 | Biography
8
6.9 (9 Ratings)
Book Rating
Amy Schumer's book comes out at a time when it seems like every celebrity in the world has a book out: some collection of essays about their life, showcasing how funny they are and what their life is like as a celebrity. In Schumer's, we hear about her life from childhood to her post <i>Trainwreck</i> success and nearly everything in between: her friendships, her relationships, her parents, and her growth as a comedian. And, of course, a lot about sex. The book is told in a series of chapters - essays if you will - each one covering a particular moment in Schumer's life. They don't go in any particular order, but cover the gamut of her range of experiences.

I found this book to be a refreshing and engaging celebrity book. It carried a surprising depth. I don't know a ton about Schumer, but loved <i>Trainwreck</i> and have had a crush on her for ages. That crush has only intensified upon reading her book, as I discovered several similarities between us: introverts who love hotdogs and have complicated relationships with their mothers, who both internalize stress to the point where it makes us sick. We're a match made in heaven! But, seriously, Schumer is an excellent writer, and her book is an easy read, with well-written and wonderful essays that range from humorous to serious (and often both).

Her book avoided all of my usual celebrity autobiography/memoir/essay pet peeves. In this book, we really learn about Schumer, instead of just a few token stories. I was fascinated to hear about her career trajectory: you get a great look into how hard she worked in her early years as a comedian. In addition, we actually get a lot of insight into her early life-- her childhood and teenage years. What I love is that she comes across as a real human being, instead of giving us a book that is simply full of polished, trite jokes and well-worn stories.

In fact, while parts of the book make you laugh out loud, other places make you empathize with Schumer. The book is funny, but not too funny or fake funny. And it's serious without preaching. She covers topics such as sexual assault, gun control, her father's MS, her relationship with her parents, and other serious childhood experiences that molded her, with a realism that is refreshing. Sure, there are a few "woe is me" moments about how hard it is to be a celebrity, or what it's like to have money, but they are few and far between. By the end, I admired Amy even more as a person and a comedian, and my crush will continue on stronger than ever.
  
HT
How to Draw Anything
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Author/artist Mark Linley believes that anyone can learn to draw and inspires everyone to pick up a pencil and create a work of art. Unlike many ‘how to draw’ books – those that provide step by step visual aids but no further insight – Linley goes into a lot more written detail.

First of all an artist needs to be able to look properly. Without studying the subject or object properly, no one would be able to produce an accurate sketch. Starting with landscapes, Linley tells the reader how to and what to look for when beginning a drawing in order to get a basic outline. It is only after this is down on paper that specific details can be added.

Linley explains various methods of shading and line marks to give a suggestion of perspective, and emphasises that an illustration does not need to be 100% accurate – that is what cameras are for. After landscapes, Linley takes the reader/future artist through plants, animals, people and cartoons in a similar manner.

Each chapter provides the reader with a few assignments to undertake based on what they have read, or the example illustrations. Many of these tasks are to copy Linley’s own examples, however he stresses that the outcome does not need to – or rather should not – look exactly like his. Each artist needs to develop their own style.

I found <i>How To Draw Anything</i> a lot more useful than the ever popular step-by-step guides that most people gravitate to. In those types of books we are NOT taught to draw, we are taught to copy. You may be able to accurately draw the same cat as the artist/author of the book, but you would not know where to start when face with a real life cat. Linley tells us what to look out for and where to start in these situations – you feel like you are actually learning something.

Mark Linley comes across as a humorous individual – his writing is full of puns and quips, intending to make the reader smile or laugh out loud, thus making them feel more relaxed about the subject. Linley does not only attempt to teach people how to draw, he tries to make each of us feel more comfortable about our abilities and encourages us to keep on trying.

Before reading this book I had already begun developing my own illustration style, however I gave a few of Linley’s assignments a try (see <a href="https://hazelstainer.wordpress.com/2016/02/19/how-to-draw-anything-a-review/">here</a>;). I am pleased with my outcomes and feel inspired to try more landscape drawings in the future.
  
The Expendables (2010)
The Expendables (2010)
2010 | Action, Mystery
8
6.9 (15 Ratings)
Movie Rating
The latest from Sylvester Stallone since 2008’s Rambo, The Expendables is a movie where the testosterone flows like enemy blood. Both movies have similar themes of redemption, regret, and courage, and also thankfully similar is that the moments of awesomeness are plentiful. The Expendables put up a lot of hype, and it had a lot to live up to with it’s cast of action star greats, but it doesn’t let the audience down. It’s not the cerebral meta-violence of Inglorious Basterds, but a simpler, old-school, fun action movie kind of violence. You can root for your favorite action hero, watch them kick a little bad-guy ass, and sit back and enjoy the show.

The characters, despite the star-studded name dropping on the film’s advertising hype, follow Barney Ross (Stallone) for the most part, and his right-hand-man Lee Christmas (Statham) a close second, with most of the other actors merely rounding out the team. Despite what would seem to be a ripoff from what they advertised on their posters, each character still gets a crowning moment of glory, albeit with less screen time than expected. In addition, these “major” side characters share frequent snide remarks that truly give each person on the team their own humorous depth of character. If you’re a fan of Jet Li or Terry Crews for example, rest assured that they all get their shining moment in the sun.

The plot, while not so simple as to be boring, surrounds an attempt by the team to overthrow a dictator in a small South American country. Complications arise, interpersonal conflicts come up, and from there, the plot takes off. Mercenary soldiers do a lot of bad things, and Stallone and co-screenwriter Dave Callaham give a good shot at prying open the inner world of some of these men as they go about their jobs, and the consequences that their actions (and often inactions) have on the way they see themselves. Granted, this is a fairly emotional touchy-feely way to describe the heart of the film, but don’t worry, these discussions are done with the stoicism and deflective humor you would expect from large men with bulging muscles and raging testosterone. The Expendables isn’t just another mindless action movie; it’s got enough going on beneath the surface to be worth watching again.

For an action blockbuster, it succeeds on most of the metrics we measure such films by, and surprisingly didn’t have many negatives. Do I care about the characters? Yes. Were there long periods without action sequences? No. Was the use of action cliche, or was it clever and original? Hilariously original at times. Was it fun? That’s an explosive yes.
  
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)
2018 | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
I have ben a huge fan of dinosaurs since about the age of five, especially when the first Jurassic Park was released. One, it had dinosaurs in it and two, my cousin had worked on the film so it was a double whammy for me. As I grew, the franchise grew and now at the age of thirty I am amazed and thrilled to see how far the franchise has grown with it’s latest film Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom.

Isla Nublar has been abandoned for three years after Jurassic World was overtaken by the dinosaurs that inhabited the theme park. Since then, the dinosaurs have had to survive by fending for themselves amongst each other. After the outcome of the containment breach in the lavish amusement park. The public became fearsome and torn. Should they save the dinosaurs or, should they be left to be decimated by the islands dormant volcano that has now awoken? Claire (Bryce Dallas Howard) is back along with a couple new characters and are at the head of a group aimed to rescue any remaining dinosaurs from what could end up being the second extinction. When Claire realizes that Blue the most intelligent raptor might still be out in the jungle; she reunites with Owen (Chris Pratt) in the hopes that he would want to help the cause. It will be their mission to save the dinosaurs from the raging volcano ravaging the island. Is that the only threat though and are the dinosaurs really the threat are we the threat?

The film serves up some action packed, edge of your seat styled entertainment from start to finish. The same action that we have come to love throughout the franchise. I actually prefer this film to the last film and I’m not quite sure why. The acting and chemistry between the actors still worked very well. Although, my favorite will always be Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) whom sadly we only really get to see a couple of times in the film” The humorous antics and nods to past films can still be noticed only if your truly paying attention. I still to this day miss the use of animatronics as apposed to all the computer generation used. I do understand that filmmakers must change with the times and it can in some scenes be viewed as more realistic than not. I have a feeling that the film might have mixed reviews but in my opinion it was fantastic. As a huge fan since the beginning, I have to say this one can’t be missed because it is RAWR-some!! Also as a special note, please stay after the credits.
  
Dancer in the Dark (2000)
Dancer in the Dark (2000)
2000 | Drama, Musical
Selma is a simple woman leading a simple life. She lives with her only son in a trailer on the property of her friends the nice cop and his wife. She works at a metal factory making sinks and basins. She doesn't make a lot of money, so she holds on to almost every penny she earns for something secret. She can't even buy her son a present for his birthday, so her friends and landlords buy the boy the used bicycle he has been yearning for. Selma also enjoys musicals. She loves them. Especially The Sound of Music, She is actually cast in a local production and gets to play Maria. She can even hear rhythm through the common sounds of life like a train on its tracks or even the sounds of people walking. She creates melodies in her head to distract from the mundane events of life. Sometimes these melodies turn into full production numbers only visible in the confines of her cerebrum.

Now the problem.

Selma is going blind. She knows she is. She is trying to set her plans and set up her son for a better life than she is able before her illness runs its course. Out of nowhere, tragedy strikes from an unexpected source. She is petrified and acts in haste with dreadful results. Now she must deal with the consequences of her actions and let the pieces fall where they must.

Controversial writer/director Lars von Trier finds an unexpected leading lady in Icelandic alternative pop singer Björk. I guess maybe not so unexpected considering all the singing in the film which she also wrote. I was surprised to read only one of the songs was nominated for Best Song in 2000 and no nomination for her acting prowess. Her emotional turmoil is the spine of the film and her simple, yet powerful demeanor holds the film together through its humorous and tense, gripping melodrama. All Selma wants is to give a good life to her son and is content with a meager existence, which, unfortunately is ripped from her.

The songs are brilliant as most of the them begin with the random noises of life in Selma's brain and become a glorious, choreographed splendor which I found myself really loving. These events make the 2nd half of the film such a tragedy as her spirit is resilient always sees the lighter side of life.

Unlike a lot of Von Trier's other work, no sex scenes and only one scene of violence in the film. The actions of the "normal" people here are the true horror.

  
Inherent Vice (2015)
Inherent Vice (2015)
2015 | Drama, Mystery
10
6.7 (3 Ratings)
Movie Rating
“Inherent Vice” Follows Doc (Joaquin Phoenix), a private investigator, as he falls down a dark rabbit hole into a world of crime and systemic corruption.
Phoenix is a transformative actor, delving deep into his role. We’ve seen him do it before in movies like “Walk the Line.” He becomes his character to the point that it is conceivable this just might be the real him.

It is set in bohemian 1970s California. Everything from the way the camera captures the scene, to the outfits that adorn the characters, exudes a hippy-grunge vibe.
The film encompasses multiple genres including crime, comedy, and drama.

Similar to movies like “The Big Lebowski,” it is filled with humorous moments as Doc, a well-meaning and laid back stoner, is constantly found in the middle of the proverbial shit.
When his ex-girlfriend Shasta Fay (Katherine Waterston) reappears one random day, telling him of a plot to kidnap her billionaire boyfriend and then disappears shortly after, Doc becomes consumed by his investigation into her whereabouts. He is led into a conspiracy-like web of drugs, crime, and corruption.

It is not a typical movie with a coherent storyline, rather it is an experience of what Doc goes through as a mind bending mystery unfolds before him.
Strange, subtle details leave a trail of breadcrumbs for the audience to follow along with Doc, as he tries to make some sense out of the connections he stumbles across.
The plot transpires in a blur, floating into the perceptions of the audience like the winding smoke of an opium den. With a few dull moments, it drags on at times, much like the reality of human experience tends to do.

The musical selection only adds to the film’s tantalizing stylistic ambiance – at times it’s a dull and prolonged high, other times it’s a seedy bluesy underground, or absolute instrumental lunacy. Interestingly, much of the music was composed by Radiohead lead guitarist Jonny Greenwood.

Adding to the intricacy and authenticity of the film, is a brief cameo by what is perhaps the most psychedelic band of our time, The Growlers. This moment will only be recognized by fans who are paying close attention, but is an absolutely fitting detail.

Director Paul Thomas Anderson adapted the film from the original novel written by Thomas Pynchon. Like reading a novel, the film is consuming. But because it goes by much quicker than reading a book, it may need to be watched several times for the viewer to grasp exactly what happened.

Audiences will leave theaters with a resonating feeling of pure delirium from the cerebral experience that is “Inherent Vice.”

A surreal masterpiece, I give “Inherent Vice” 5 out of 5 stars.
  
Tower Heist (2011)
Tower Heist (2011)
2011 | Action, Comedy, Drama
9
6.7 (11 Ratings)
Movie Rating
In the movie Tower Heist, the employees of The Tower, a ritzy high-rise condominium in New York City, fall victim to a Ponzi scheme and lose their 401(k). Now normally there wouldn’t be anything they could do about it but Arthur Shaw (Alan Alda), the one behind the Ponzi scheme, is one of the residents at The Tower.

Josh Kovacs (Ben Stiller), former general anager of The Tower, has an idea to steal the defrauded employees’ money back, but he needs help with his grand scheme. Josh brings in his brother-in-law Cole Howard (Casey Affleck) and Rick Malloy (Michael Pena). Both are former employees and as such have a score to settle. Josh also enlists the help of Odessa Montero (Gabourey Sidibe) who is currently a maid at the Tower and Chase Fitzhugh (Matthew Broderick), a former resident.

While eager to do what they believe is right, the group does not have a background in crime, so Josh brings in Slide (Eddie Murphy), a thief from his neighborhood that he has known since childhood. Will this band of merry men and woman be successful and save the day Robin Hood-style or will they run afoul of FBI Agent Claire Denham (Tea Leoni)?

The film has a very entertaining story that unfolds beautifully and a better cast would be impossible to find. Now with that said, there were some parts in the movie that were distracting to me because I could not suspend my disbelief that far, however, I can’t say what they are due to the fact that I do not want to spoil any scenes for you.

Eddie Murphy did an amazing job of keeping his character realistic and at the same time unbelievably funny. Without a doubt every scene Murphy is in is golden. Not only did Alan Alda’s character get arrested for stealing people’s money but he almost stole the show. And even though every fiber of my being wanted to dislike his character, who is an arrogant, self-righteous, demeaning jerk; Alda portrayed him in such a way that I was actually sort of hoping that the character would get away with it. Now I know all you Benheads out there are asking “What about Ben Stiller?” You all will be happy to know that he was great, he was definitely the humorous glue that held the movie together. Matthew Broderick, Michael Pena and Casey Affleck were all very entertaining though at times Casey gets drowned out by the others. Last but certainly not least Gabourey Sidibe and Tea Leoni were both great and incredibly funny however they did not get anywhere near as much screen time as I would have liked.
  
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