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Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi (2017)
Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi (2017)
2017 | Action, Sci-Fi
Effects work, visual flair, soundtrack (0 more)
Cast are unimpressive, characters all feel different, doesn't feel like a continuation of previous films (0 more)
Great visuals let down by meandering story
For those who are unaware, The Jast Jedi is the latest instalment in the core Star Wars series, and picks up from where Force Awakens left off. Rey (played by the decidedly average Daisy Ridley) is on an island with Mark Hamill (playing himself it seems as the mannerisms of the character bore no similarity to the one we saw in Episodes 4, 5 and 6). Chewbacca is also there, but you wouldn’t really tell aside from a few “comedy” moments with the creatures of the island shoehorned in to seemingly ignore the trauma of losing his blood-oath life companion in the last film (Han Solo….keep up people) and instead have him there to just growl at “The Most Annoying and Unnecessary Additions To Film Since Jar Jar”™ from time to time. Whilst there she seeks to recruit Mark to aid Carrie Fisher’s rebellion (again…something not quite right about the character, and another who seems to have gotten over a traumatic murder of a loved one….by a loved one…quite rapidly) and also train her up in the way of the Super-Jedi (seriously, the powers are far beyond anything we have come to know from Jedi before).

Meanwhile Finn wakes up so he can perform comedy pratfalls a lot, Poe has become a one-man-army who could possibly defeat the whole Empire if Carrie would just stop demoting him, and BB8 seems to have more internal mechanical abilities than Cyborg in the DC comics. Remember how much the paring of Rey and Finn worked in the previous film? Yeah, that’s not here. How about Poe and Finn…that bromance? Nope. Okay…what about….ah forget it.

So, on the flip-side Kylo Ren (Adam Driver who I genuinely don’t get the obsession some folk have with) is acting all emo at how Supreme Leader Snoke is seemingly in love with General Hux (Domhall Gleeson, who acts like he’s in a Carry On film). Snoke is no longer a huge hologram, but is now a physical entity in the film, played (rather excellently I must add) by CGI mo-cap legend Andy Serkis. Strange that a CGI character feels more real than any of the rest of the cast, but hey-ho. With his mighty fleet, Snoke leads the battle to wipe the last remnants of the Rebellion….

The film opens with a spectacular space battle, and certainly doesn’t skimp on set-pieces throughout, with land and space being covered in glory. But story wise there isn’t much going on, even though Rian Johnson clearly thinks there is. Not really a spoiler, but when the Rebel fleet are on the run, trying to stay out of reach of the First Order craft, you do wonder why a few of the first order fleet didn’t just jump to a short hyperdrive to pen the Rebels in, rather than just following behind like sheep. That minor niggle is the smallest of the film’s story problems.

The issue seems to be that many moments have been engineered purely to pull the rug out from under the fan-theorists, rather than being included to actually serve the story on offer. None of the reveals are particularly clever, and one moment in particular resonated in the same manner the “Martha!” moment did in Batman v Superman, so poorly presented that it was almost hilarious in the reveal. Shoehorn in a few cameos, and contrived scene set ups and the whole thing feels like it is trying to pack two films into one, and in order to do so decided to cut out all the bits that make sense to make room for ‘action…fights….explosions…and…..’

…PORGS! Damn those things to Hades! Absolutely unnecessary, irritating, and jarring enough when on screen to make you stop actually caring about the action going on. They are used at the most inopportune moments in a poor attempt to generate laughs! I’ve seen people argue that, “Star Wars is for kids, so of course some things would be childish!” A poor excuse, and it’s the same one George Lucas used for Jar Jar Binks. Still feel it’s a good excuse? They are a marketing ploy to sell cuddly merchandise, and they are awful!

It’s not entirely bad, though. As mentioned the action and effects work is stunning, and there are some marvellous visual feasts on offer. The score is, as expected from music maestro John Williams, enchanting, thrilling, and with plenty of echoes of previous themes morphed into the mix. It’s just that, overall, this feels less like part of the Star Wars series, and more like a fan-fiction. It’s a shame as Rian Johnson has a strong pedigree with Brick and Looper, and hearing he has been granted a new trilogy of films of his own design was exciting news. After this, however, all I can say is that I’m glad JJ Abrams is coming back for the final part – maybe the magic will return with him.

Better than the prequels, including Rogue One, but the weaker of the rest, The Last Jedi is overlong for no real reason, and not as sharp as it wants to be. All gloss and style, but with very little substance.
  
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011)
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011)
2011 | Drama, Mystery
9
8.5 (4 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Following the very successful adaptation of Stieg Larssons millennium trilogy into three very successful Swedish language films, it came as no surprise when Hollywood announced that it would be making an English-language version of the series. Director David Fincher was announced to craft the first book in the series, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. The new version follows very close to the original material with one fairly big exception which I will detail later in the review.

Daniel Craig stars as Mikael Blomkvist, who at the opening of the film has recently lost a court case for which he was being sued for libel by a prominent business figure. His career is in ruins and virtually all of his savings gone as a result of the trial and punitive damages. So when he is contacted by an attorney representing the wealthy and powerful Vanger family, he agrees to meet. Although highly reluctant to take a meeting, Mikael takes the four hour train ride north of Stockholm to a cold and remote island to meet with Henrik Vanger (Christopher Plummer). Henrik wishes Mikael to investigate the disappearance of his niece some 40 years earlier, a niece vanished under the families’ very noses and not a trace of her has been discovered since. Henrik is convinced that she has met with foul play, yet every year on his birthday, he continues to receive a gift of ornate pressed flowers in an anonymous package.

Henrik believes that the killer is haunting him by sending the gifts and that a member of his family may be to blame. Although skeptical of being able to find anything 40 years later, Mikael accepts the case and soon sets up residence in a small cabin on the island and begins his investigation by combing through police reports, conducting interviews, and examining photographs and newspaper clippings. Mikael had been warned that the other members of the Vanger family may not be too thrilled with his presence as not only is the family fractured, they all have their share of secrets.

At the same time, a very Goth punk girl named Lisabeth (Rooney Mara), is fighting her own demons. Lisabeth is an extremely gifted computer and surveillance expert who specializes in gathering background information on individuals. As such, her skills have made her in high demand with her employer. Unfortunately, Lisabeth is also a deeply antisocial person who is prone to lash out violently if provoked. Much of this stems from an extremely traumatic childhood spent in institutions which resulted in Lisabeth being placed as a ward of the state, not deemed competent to care for herself. This arrangement requires her to check in on a regular basis with a representative who, unfortunately for her, has recently suffered a stroke and places her in the care of the new guardian.

The new guardian subjects Lisabeth to horrific demands just so Lisabeth can access her money. The traumatized Lisabeth does not play victim long and in a twist of fate, is assigned by Henrik’s attorney to assist Mikael since she did the background check on him prior to Mikael being approached by Henrik for the investigation. The unlikely duo combined to form a highly efficient pair as they start to piece together the clues which indicate a brutal string of murders leading back for decades. As they work together, the relationship deepens and the reserved Lisabeth starts to come out of her shell. Tension mounts as danger surrounds them in an epic race against time to solve the case that certain members of the family do not want solved.

The film runs approximately 2 hours and 45 min and does take a little while to get started as the landscape and back story of the characters is established. The film has some very dark and brutal moments, which are hard to watch, yet were not as graphic as those in the Swedish language version. Craig and Mara work very well with one another and props to Craig for being willing to put on weight and occasionally looked disheveled to enhance his character.

Mara gives a masterful performance as the complicated Lisabeth, the anti-damsel-in-distress heroine, who subtly shows the many complicated sides to the character. Noomi Rapace first portrayed the character and has gone on to prominent success in Hollywood with a slew of upcoming high profile films. I would expect nothing less for Mara with two other sequels in this series to film. I am sure this breakout performance will not go unnoticed as it is an extremely difficult and daring role that few in Hollywood would want to tackle, much less be able to pull off as convincingly as she did.

I was extremely happy to see that the character names, settings, and situations were not changed in the new version, and it was refreshing to see the film set in Sweden and not relocated to London or New York. The biggest issue I had with the film was with the ending, which deviated from the previous versions. I will not provide spoilers, suffice it to say the resolution was a bit too tidy of a Hollywood ending and in my opinion greatly undermined one of the central characters of the film. That being said the film is a bold and dynamic vision from Fincher and is a deeply dark and disturbing story that is difficult to forget.
  
Jamaica
Jamaica
2007 | Nautical, Pirates, Racing, Transportation
I have said before on several reviews that I just love the pirate theme in board games. I don’t really know why, exactly, but most piratey games just click with me. Is it the doubloons? Is it the booty? Yes, it’s probably everything. This time, however, the game is a race around the island, and it will do you well to get past the starting line.


Jamaica a dice-chucking, simultaneous action, hand management racing game set in the year 1708. Player assume the roles of pirate captains and crew traveling around the island of Jamaica deciding the best courses to take and the greatest booty to plunder and bring back across the finish line.
To setup, place the main board in the center of the table. Each player chooses a pirate captain and receives all components of that color. In addition each pirate will receive 3 doubloons, 3 food tokens, and 3 cards drawn to begin their journey. Consult the rulebook to setup the rest of the components, give the starting player the token and dice and the game may begin!

On a turn the starting player will roll the two action dice and places one on the morning action space and one on the evening action space. Each player then chooses a card from their hand of three to play. Once the starting player plays and resolves their card, each other player will do the same. Whatever number is on the morning action die corresponds to the resource or movement amount to be placed in hold or moved on the board. For example, if the dice values are 4 and 3 for morning and evening, respectively, then the players will gain 4 of whatever resource or movement is shown on the left side of their card and 3 of whatever is shown on the right side of their card. There are special rules for placing resources in holds and for landing on certain spots on the game board, which I will have you discover when you play your first game.

On occasion pirates will end their movement on a space already containing another pirate’s shipeeple and, as is customary, a battle ensues. This involves both players choosing the amount of gunpowder (resource) they wish to add to the roll of a combat die. For example, if Laura attacks Josh at the starting line (because one had moved backward and then forward again) and dedicates three gunpowder to the combat and rolls a 4 on the combat die her total is seven. Josh then dedicates his five gunpowder to the combat and rolls a 5 as well for a total of 10. Josh wins and can steal items in one hold space on her ship, steal a treasure card earned at pirate lairs, or give a cursed treasure card to Laura.


Play continues in this fashion until one player crosses the finish line at Port Royal. The round finishes and then players tally points. Points are earned for board space number where their shipeeple finished, doubloons in holds, and positive VP treasure cards. If any cursed treasures are held they are negative VP cards and will be deducted from the player’s total score. The player with the most VP at the end of the game is the winner of the race and thus has bragging rights until the next annual race is held.
Components. The components in Jamaica are stellar, and the art is incredible. Every single component in the box is just wonderful to behold and to handle during play. I especially enjoy the art style employed, even down to the graphic design of the rulebook. Every piece seems to have love and affection poured into them and that is partly why Jamaica is so highly regarded among many (currently ranked 494 on BGG in February 2021).

Another reason pirates dig this (haha see what I did there with the digging as if referencing the hiding of booty… nevermind) is because the gameplay is so smooth and enjoyable. Yes, I have been witness to a game where two players made it not three spaces from the start when the game ended. It was ridiculous and unforgettable. Yes, there are points in the game where you MUST travel backward in order to continue forward in the game. Yes, much of what happens in the game is a result of dice rolls, but choosing the best cards to use in order to maximize the dice results is the crux of the game. No pirates have special abilities, so it is an even playing field, and I love that.

The game is absolutely stunning on the table, easy to pick up and play, and offers so many wonderful memories to be made each time you play. Purple Phoenix Games emphatically gives this one a booty-ful 19 / 24. If you are looking for that niche pirate-themed racing game with treasure stealing and dice rolling, this is it. I have found the perfect game for that slot in your collection. If you are looking for a fun racing game that also includes battles and possibilities of incremental progression, this is it. I can’t speak highly enough about Jamaica, and the only reason it scores a 5 for me instead of a 6 is because I simply cannot play it enough to increase its score. It hits all the buttons for me, but I fear it does not have the wider interest in my group to reach my Top 10.