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Purple Phoenix Games (2266 KP) rated Coconuts in Tabletop Games
Jun 12, 2019
I usually like to create some fanciful intro to my reviews to get you in the setting of the game and in the mood to be entertained and educated about the game in question. I have failed this time.
You’re a monkey trying to throw coconuts into cups.
This is not a very theme-heavy role-playing game where you need to get into the heads of the characters and base your actions on what they would do. Instead, you are grabbing a monkey shooter action figure, placing a rubber Milk Dud (not a sponsor) in its hands and making the figure fling said forbidden delicious treat into yellow and red plastic cups. Should you make a basket into a yellow cup, you take that cup and place it in front of you in a vertical bowling pin assembly. Make a red cup shot and you not only get the cup to add to your collection, but you take another turn. The first player to amass six cups in front of them is the winner!
This sounds so stupid. Why am I reviewing this?? This is a kid’s “game.” You are right. This is incredibly childish. But it’s also INCREDIBLY fun. Have you read our review of Happy Salmon? This fills a similar role in that you break this bad boy out when you need a mental break between heavier games, or when you want the children to be involved in your game night. There is no real thinking involved. Player interaction? Sure. Some. Whether you choose to shoot your coconuts into the middle area of unclaimed cups, or into your opponents’ collections and take their hard-earned cups is up to you (I approve and encourage this cutthroat behavior).
Let’s go back to the children playing this with you thought. The box says ages 6+. I wholeheartedly disagree, but it may just be my situation. I have played this with my 2-year-old son and he had an absolute blast just flinging the coconuts everywhere while we adults were trying to play the game correctly. But the final score doesn’t matter. In a game like this I rarely care about winning or losing. My kid “wins” every time. It’s just plain fun to fling coconuts. I also rarely play with the included disadvantage cards to screw with my opponents because honestly, it’s hard enough to get those things in the cups.
Yes, he also shot one into my water cup so I let him score it on his mat. It’s only fair…
Components. I have good news and bad news. Good news: the monkeys, coconuts, and cups are of amazing quality. Amazing, I say! Bad news: the cards and the player mats. They are just of entry level acceptable quality. But like I said, I really don’t care much about using the cards, and the player mats are really just there to create a solid surface to put your score cups on anyway. So I’m ultimately good with that.
Now, I Kickstarted this game (as well as the Coconuts Duo project that was made for 2 player games or as a 6 player expansion for Coconuts). I got all the fancy pink and green coconuts too. They officially add nothing mechanically to the game (but you can home-brew house rules for them), but they are easier to find on the floor when you inevitably fling too far. That is, if you can find them before your dogs decide that you have given them little brown treats…
There is really not much else to say about this game except that it is super fun, takes literally 10 seconds to explain, and kids can play with you as well. We love it, and so our rating reflects that. Purple Phoenix Games gives this little game a Whopper (see what I did there?) of 18 / 24.
https://purplephoenixgames.wordpress.com/2019/05/07/coconuts-review/
You’re a monkey trying to throw coconuts into cups.
This is not a very theme-heavy role-playing game where you need to get into the heads of the characters and base your actions on what they would do. Instead, you are grabbing a monkey shooter action figure, placing a rubber Milk Dud (not a sponsor) in its hands and making the figure fling said forbidden delicious treat into yellow and red plastic cups. Should you make a basket into a yellow cup, you take that cup and place it in front of you in a vertical bowling pin assembly. Make a red cup shot and you not only get the cup to add to your collection, but you take another turn. The first player to amass six cups in front of them is the winner!
This sounds so stupid. Why am I reviewing this?? This is a kid’s “game.” You are right. This is incredibly childish. But it’s also INCREDIBLY fun. Have you read our review of Happy Salmon? This fills a similar role in that you break this bad boy out when you need a mental break between heavier games, or when you want the children to be involved in your game night. There is no real thinking involved. Player interaction? Sure. Some. Whether you choose to shoot your coconuts into the middle area of unclaimed cups, or into your opponents’ collections and take their hard-earned cups is up to you (I approve and encourage this cutthroat behavior).
Let’s go back to the children playing this with you thought. The box says ages 6+. I wholeheartedly disagree, but it may just be my situation. I have played this with my 2-year-old son and he had an absolute blast just flinging the coconuts everywhere while we adults were trying to play the game correctly. But the final score doesn’t matter. In a game like this I rarely care about winning or losing. My kid “wins” every time. It’s just plain fun to fling coconuts. I also rarely play with the included disadvantage cards to screw with my opponents because honestly, it’s hard enough to get those things in the cups.
Yes, he also shot one into my water cup so I let him score it on his mat. It’s only fair…
Components. I have good news and bad news. Good news: the monkeys, coconuts, and cups are of amazing quality. Amazing, I say! Bad news: the cards and the player mats. They are just of entry level acceptable quality. But like I said, I really don’t care much about using the cards, and the player mats are really just there to create a solid surface to put your score cups on anyway. So I’m ultimately good with that.
Now, I Kickstarted this game (as well as the Coconuts Duo project that was made for 2 player games or as a 6 player expansion for Coconuts). I got all the fancy pink and green coconuts too. They officially add nothing mechanically to the game (but you can home-brew house rules for them), but they are easier to find on the floor when you inevitably fling too far. That is, if you can find them before your dogs decide that you have given them little brown treats…
There is really not much else to say about this game except that it is super fun, takes literally 10 seconds to explain, and kids can play with you as well. We love it, and so our rating reflects that. Purple Phoenix Games gives this little game a Whopper (see what I did there?) of 18 / 24.
https://purplephoenixgames.wordpress.com/2019/05/07/coconuts-review/
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Jordan Binkerd (567 KP) rated Mercy Kill (X-Wing #10) in Books
Aug 15, 2019 (Updated Aug 20, 2019)
Note: this review is transposted from my personal review blog, and so was originally written several years ago. I figured if I reposted it here, someone might actually read it….
NOTE: This novel is no longer canon following Disney’s acquisition of Star Wars. That’s not to say it isn’t good, just that it belongs to the old Canon - I prefer to think of it as an alternate universe.
Do you remember fondly the Star Wars novels of the 90s? Are you into Star Wars but a newcomer to the Expanded Universe? Do you enjoy your Star Wars with an undertone of comedy, so long as a certain floppy-eared terror is nowhere in sight? If so, X-WING: MERCY KILL may be a good book for you to check out.
Unlike most of the books being released set in the “modern” era of the Star Wars universe (44 ABY–i.e., 44 Years post-Episode IV), MERCY KILL lets you jump right in, more or less without knowing the situation to that point. A lot of the others you could read cold, but they wouldn’t make much sense. MERCY KILL, however, has little to do with the ongoing plot of the Expanded Universe. It’s rooted in recent events, but the setup is very simple and easily grasped. It would pay to know the characters from the X-Wing novels of the 90s, but even that is not really necessary. You could check out three or four articles on Wookiepedia and be fine–I did, just to refresh my memory.
So….here’s what you need to know. In the 90s, they published a series of comics and then novels based around Rogue Squadron, led by Wedge Antilles and a number of the X-Wing pilots from the films along with some new faces. These comics and the first four novels were written by Michael Stackpole, but after the fourth he dropped out for a while citing other commitments he had to work on. So they hired in Aaron Allston to continue the series. Allston decided to let the Rogues go off on their own adventures while he created a new team for his novels–Wraith Squadron, a team of X-Wing pilots who would work equally well as a ground-based commando team. The result was a cross between The A-Team and The Dirty Dozen, with some aerial action thrown in. For the purposes of this new novel, notable characters included Garik “Face” Loran, a child star turned soldier and the eventual commander of the Wraiths; and Voort “Piggy” SaBinring, a genetically-modified Gamorrean. There are a few other returning faces, but these were the better developed and you can probably get by just knowing them.
The Star Wars publishing event of the early 2000s was the New Jedi Order series, in which a race of extra-galactic aliens called the Yuuzhan Vong invaded the Galaxy Far, Far Away and sought to subjugate its people. They almost did it, and they changed the way Star Wars novels worked in the process. Characters–MAIN CHARACTERS–died. Chewbacca, Han and Leia’s youngest son Anakin Solo, and countless others fell to the military might of the invaders. There have been other upheavals since, most notably a second Galactic Civil War when Han and Leia’s oldest son Jacen Solo fell to the Dark Side. In the aftermath of that war, a conspiracy was formed to take over both the Galactic Alliance and the Empire and merge them together once again, recapturing the glory of the height of the Old Empire. This conspiracy failed, but it may not have been completely rooted out…..
In this book, Garik Loran is called out of retirement by the head of the Alliance military. He wants Loran to quietly look into rumors that an up-and-coming officer may have been connected to the Lecerson Conspiracy. Wraith Squadron is back in business! The resulting adventure is a fun trip, dealing both in nostalgia for those of us who read the adventures of the original Wraiths long ago and in action that newer fans can get into, all the while serving up Allston’s signature undertone of humor mixed with heart. I heartily recommend it. The one caveat I will mention for fans of the original books is that there is comparatively little aerial combat in this book. The plot doesn’t call for it, and I certainly didn’t really miss it too much, but some may be disappointed by that.
If you want more reading suggestions, the X-Wing: Rogue Squadron comics and X-Wing novels are quite good. If you wanted to enhance your experience with this book, I would have you read at least the novels, but you may not have the patience for all nine of the previous books. If not, I won’t hold it against you.
Content-wise, they keep the Star Wars novels pretty PG. Mild language, mild violence, mild innuendos…..nothing to worry about.
Original post: https://jordanbinkerd.wordpress.com/2013/03/12/review-star-wars-x-wing-mercy-kill-by-aaron-allston/
NOTE: This novel is no longer canon following Disney’s acquisition of Star Wars. That’s not to say it isn’t good, just that it belongs to the old Canon - I prefer to think of it as an alternate universe.
Do you remember fondly the Star Wars novels of the 90s? Are you into Star Wars but a newcomer to the Expanded Universe? Do you enjoy your Star Wars with an undertone of comedy, so long as a certain floppy-eared terror is nowhere in sight? If so, X-WING: MERCY KILL may be a good book for you to check out.
Unlike most of the books being released set in the “modern” era of the Star Wars universe (44 ABY–i.e., 44 Years post-Episode IV), MERCY KILL lets you jump right in, more or less without knowing the situation to that point. A lot of the others you could read cold, but they wouldn’t make much sense. MERCY KILL, however, has little to do with the ongoing plot of the Expanded Universe. It’s rooted in recent events, but the setup is very simple and easily grasped. It would pay to know the characters from the X-Wing novels of the 90s, but even that is not really necessary. You could check out three or four articles on Wookiepedia and be fine–I did, just to refresh my memory.
So….here’s what you need to know. In the 90s, they published a series of comics and then novels based around Rogue Squadron, led by Wedge Antilles and a number of the X-Wing pilots from the films along with some new faces. These comics and the first four novels were written by Michael Stackpole, but after the fourth he dropped out for a while citing other commitments he had to work on. So they hired in Aaron Allston to continue the series. Allston decided to let the Rogues go off on their own adventures while he created a new team for his novels–Wraith Squadron, a team of X-Wing pilots who would work equally well as a ground-based commando team. The result was a cross between The A-Team and The Dirty Dozen, with some aerial action thrown in. For the purposes of this new novel, notable characters included Garik “Face” Loran, a child star turned soldier and the eventual commander of the Wraiths; and Voort “Piggy” SaBinring, a genetically-modified Gamorrean. There are a few other returning faces, but these were the better developed and you can probably get by just knowing them.
The Star Wars publishing event of the early 2000s was the New Jedi Order series, in which a race of extra-galactic aliens called the Yuuzhan Vong invaded the Galaxy Far, Far Away and sought to subjugate its people. They almost did it, and they changed the way Star Wars novels worked in the process. Characters–MAIN CHARACTERS–died. Chewbacca, Han and Leia’s youngest son Anakin Solo, and countless others fell to the military might of the invaders. There have been other upheavals since, most notably a second Galactic Civil War when Han and Leia’s oldest son Jacen Solo fell to the Dark Side. In the aftermath of that war, a conspiracy was formed to take over both the Galactic Alliance and the Empire and merge them together once again, recapturing the glory of the height of the Old Empire. This conspiracy failed, but it may not have been completely rooted out…..
In this book, Garik Loran is called out of retirement by the head of the Alliance military. He wants Loran to quietly look into rumors that an up-and-coming officer may have been connected to the Lecerson Conspiracy. Wraith Squadron is back in business! The resulting adventure is a fun trip, dealing both in nostalgia for those of us who read the adventures of the original Wraiths long ago and in action that newer fans can get into, all the while serving up Allston’s signature undertone of humor mixed with heart. I heartily recommend it. The one caveat I will mention for fans of the original books is that there is comparatively little aerial combat in this book. The plot doesn’t call for it, and I certainly didn’t really miss it too much, but some may be disappointed by that.
If you want more reading suggestions, the X-Wing: Rogue Squadron comics and X-Wing novels are quite good. If you wanted to enhance your experience with this book, I would have you read at least the novels, but you may not have the patience for all nine of the previous books. If not, I won’t hold it against you.
Content-wise, they keep the Star Wars novels pretty PG. Mild language, mild violence, mild innuendos…..nothing to worry about.
Original post: https://jordanbinkerd.wordpress.com/2013/03/12/review-star-wars-x-wing-mercy-kill-by-aaron-allston/
A Bibliophagist (113 KP) rated Space Opera in Books
Jan 25, 2020 (Updated Jan 25, 2020)
Fun writing (2 more)
Creative
Witty
Overwritten (3 more)
Lacking plot
Disjointed and distracted
Boring
Technicolor Encyclopedia entry
Space Opera seems to be a book, that based on other reviews, you either love or hate. The love reviewers can't seem to tell me why they love it, most attempting to replicate the style of the author and relying on a menagerie of adjectives to express themselves. "A glitter punk, Eurovision romp!" "Technicolor whirlwind!" but not actually saying WHY they liked it, or just saying "well you didn't get the humor". The ones who disliked it are pretty clear, and as I struggled with this book I found I agreed with their complaints. However, I have to thank the sheer number of DNFs from the disliked group for causing me to, ironically, finish it. I hate DNFing books, to begin with, but when I saw just how many bad reviews didn't make it through, it felt as bad as the good reviews not actually reviewing anything. So I powered through, and honestly, it was worth finishing. The author really got back on track and it was a great ending.
Valente has in fact given us a Eurovision, glitter punk, electric baby with Douglas Adams, her writing fantastical and humorous, her characters vapid but in a washed-out musician kind of way. She really thought about this book, creating droves of aliens and probably destroying a number of thesauri to bring them to life. We follow Decibel Jones of the "oh you haven't heard of it, well we used to be a thing" Decibel Jones and the Absolute Zeros. A washed-up, no longer active glitter punk band who is an amalgam of every band you probably are thinking of when trying to grasp what that description means.
The book opens with a wonderfully witty description of how there is in fact other life out there in the universe, life is easy to come by, they've just been off doing a galactic war and while they were gone we kind of popped up. Life is stupid. This part is the best part of the book. The humor is on point, the prose magnificant. She is spot on and very pointed in her argument for why war happens. It's people vs meat, and how does one determine something isn't meat, but in fact sentient? Well, no one really figured that out, hence the galactic war, but NOW post-war they think they've figured it out. Intergalactic Music competition. Makes sense, only something sentient could create music right?
Well, this year is a special year because Earth is invited, we've been deemed "may be sentient", but questionable enough that they'd rather not let us just hang out and become annoying someday. So we have to present a band and performance for consideration. We just have to not place last. If we don't place last, we're part of the club and we'll be a-ok. If we place last, we'll be destroyed, because they already think we're annoying and that will mean we're meat. People vs meat remember?
So, one day everyone on the planet earth, everyone, awake or sleeping is visited by the blue birdlike projection of our assigned guides, the Esca, and alien species that are new to the whole being accepted as a sentient thing, and will guide us through the competition. Which it is now telling us about, Suprise! They've chosen a list of musicians they think will do well, however it's outdated and only one band is really able to do it, the has-beens, who are they, Decibel Jones and the Absolute Zeros. Time was rough on our glam-punk friends as it tends to be on musicians, they lost the third member about a decade ago, the two remaining no longer talk. Decibel is a trainwreck, and Oort St Ultraviolet is now just a dad who very much wants to be a regular dude. But now they're being whisked off into space to sing for the world's salvation.
Sounds pretty fun right? This plus Douglas Adams type prose and humor? A real knock out. Unfortunately, that story I just described takes up... maybe a quarter of the book, MAYBE. You can pull the main story out and put it into a book that might be too small to be a novella. Because of this, the backstory, development, and exploration of these characters are slim to nothing. There is some mind you, but very little. It isn't until the 180pg mark or so that Valente actually decides to focus on the plot, giving very little time to do the entire Grand Prix, the actual competition takes up a page. A 288-page book about a singing competition and only 1-2 pages is actually the singing competition. Tack on another 10 maybe for the weird cocktail death party right before, that didn't have enough attempted death to make any real point of it, plus maybe another 5-10 scattered throughout the book on the back story and leading up to the story, and we've got MAYBE 25 pages of the actual plot. My math is wrong, I know, but it sure FEELS like this.
So, in a 288-page book, with 25 pages being the actual story, what are the other 263 pages? It was the author being somewhat... I don't mean to sound mean, but full of herself? She tried WAY too hard on this style she was going for. It felt like an "oh, you liked that opening chapter, didn't you? You totally read it out loud to your boyfriend, well here let me give it to you again, and again, and ... again". This book suffers from a severe case of needing to be edited. Of someone saying "that's enough now dear, but what about the story". Every few pages of the backstory of the plot we got were met with full chapters, sometimes multiple of Valente describing yet another alien species she's created, in yet another chain of witty simile and metaphor. To the point where sometimes I no longer knew what was happening, they were all interchangeable, which alien are we talking about now? It went on and on and on, and I never knew how such humorous writing could be just so soul suckingly boring. When she ran out of aliens it was describing previous grand prix's and how the aliens sang. In the exact same, formulaic, witty simile, witty simile, witty simile. Don't get me wrong, there were some absolute gems in here. Some that made me laugh out loud. But it's all about the ratio. I would trade in a heartbeat the ratio in this book. 263 pages of plot, and 25 pages of aliens described in witty simile. It took everything in my power after the third alien chapter to not skim. But she fit so much into a sentence that I was scared somewhere hiding would be a plot point (spoiler alert, there wasn't, skim away).
Then around the 180 page mark, a flip was switched, it was almost as if she went "crap, a story!" the adjective use was slimmed down dramatically and we actually got more than one chapter in a row with a plot point. But at this point, it was too late, the end of the book was hurdling at us and very little had happened and the book pretty much fizzled out with an "oh yeah, the Grand Prix happened". Mind you, the finale was very heartwarming and I liked it a lot. I just wish I hadn't had to read a full chapter about hairbrush interspecies sex to get there, and instead had more of it. But ironically, the hairbrush sex had more plot advancement that the majority of the book.
The ending did, however, for one moment, make me forget that I had just read an encyclopedia of descriptors and was happy for a few minutes. So good on her for that. That proves to me that she can write more than glittery descriptions, which then made me sad I didn't have more of that writing. With just a spattering of the gold of her opening chapters. I am glad I finished the book, the story, what little there was, was worth the read. However, I have no desire to read any other of Valente's writing now, and if there was a sequel, I just don't think I have it in me to read another 263 pages of description. Cool idea, good ability, just terribly executed. She could easily have released a separate book, expanding on a handful of species she established in the book, like an alien compendium, and I would have read it, and laughed, and been okay because I went into it expecting it. But I went into this wanting a story, not a neon throwup encyclopedia of just how "oh so creative" Valente is. That came off harsh, I know, but they blew past the fine line of interesting and well into the self-serving, look what I can do, territory. What suffered for it wasn't just a large number of DNFs, and my sanity for a few days, but an actually interesting, fun, Eurovision, glitter punk, heartwarming story about loss, life, how stupid it is, how beautiful it is, and why we should fight for it. It's in there, hiding beneath the layers and layers of word vomit. I want that story. Please release a second edition that is just that, the opening, and say... 3-5 of your favorite aliens Valente, I promise I'll give it another try if you do.
Valente has in fact given us a Eurovision, glitter punk, electric baby with Douglas Adams, her writing fantastical and humorous, her characters vapid but in a washed-out musician kind of way. She really thought about this book, creating droves of aliens and probably destroying a number of thesauri to bring them to life. We follow Decibel Jones of the "oh you haven't heard of it, well we used to be a thing" Decibel Jones and the Absolute Zeros. A washed-up, no longer active glitter punk band who is an amalgam of every band you probably are thinking of when trying to grasp what that description means.
The book opens with a wonderfully witty description of how there is in fact other life out there in the universe, life is easy to come by, they've just been off doing a galactic war and while they were gone we kind of popped up. Life is stupid. This part is the best part of the book. The humor is on point, the prose magnificant. She is spot on and very pointed in her argument for why war happens. It's people vs meat, and how does one determine something isn't meat, but in fact sentient? Well, no one really figured that out, hence the galactic war, but NOW post-war they think they've figured it out. Intergalactic Music competition. Makes sense, only something sentient could create music right?
Well, this year is a special year because Earth is invited, we've been deemed "may be sentient", but questionable enough that they'd rather not let us just hang out and become annoying someday. So we have to present a band and performance for consideration. We just have to not place last. If we don't place last, we're part of the club and we'll be a-ok. If we place last, we'll be destroyed, because they already think we're annoying and that will mean we're meat. People vs meat remember?
So, one day everyone on the planet earth, everyone, awake or sleeping is visited by the blue birdlike projection of our assigned guides, the Esca, and alien species that are new to the whole being accepted as a sentient thing, and will guide us through the competition. Which it is now telling us about, Suprise! They've chosen a list of musicians they think will do well, however it's outdated and only one band is really able to do it, the has-beens, who are they, Decibel Jones and the Absolute Zeros. Time was rough on our glam-punk friends as it tends to be on musicians, they lost the third member about a decade ago, the two remaining no longer talk. Decibel is a trainwreck, and Oort St Ultraviolet is now just a dad who very much wants to be a regular dude. But now they're being whisked off into space to sing for the world's salvation.
Sounds pretty fun right? This plus Douglas Adams type prose and humor? A real knock out. Unfortunately, that story I just described takes up... maybe a quarter of the book, MAYBE. You can pull the main story out and put it into a book that might be too small to be a novella. Because of this, the backstory, development, and exploration of these characters are slim to nothing. There is some mind you, but very little. It isn't until the 180pg mark or so that Valente actually decides to focus on the plot, giving very little time to do the entire Grand Prix, the actual competition takes up a page. A 288-page book about a singing competition and only 1-2 pages is actually the singing competition. Tack on another 10 maybe for the weird cocktail death party right before, that didn't have enough attempted death to make any real point of it, plus maybe another 5-10 scattered throughout the book on the back story and leading up to the story, and we've got MAYBE 25 pages of the actual plot. My math is wrong, I know, but it sure FEELS like this.
So, in a 288-page book, with 25 pages being the actual story, what are the other 263 pages? It was the author being somewhat... I don't mean to sound mean, but full of herself? She tried WAY too hard on this style she was going for. It felt like an "oh, you liked that opening chapter, didn't you? You totally read it out loud to your boyfriend, well here let me give it to you again, and again, and ... again". This book suffers from a severe case of needing to be edited. Of someone saying "that's enough now dear, but what about the story". Every few pages of the backstory of the plot we got were met with full chapters, sometimes multiple of Valente describing yet another alien species she's created, in yet another chain of witty simile and metaphor. To the point where sometimes I no longer knew what was happening, they were all interchangeable, which alien are we talking about now? It went on and on and on, and I never knew how such humorous writing could be just so soul suckingly boring. When she ran out of aliens it was describing previous grand prix's and how the aliens sang. In the exact same, formulaic, witty simile, witty simile, witty simile. Don't get me wrong, there were some absolute gems in here. Some that made me laugh out loud. But it's all about the ratio. I would trade in a heartbeat the ratio in this book. 263 pages of plot, and 25 pages of aliens described in witty simile. It took everything in my power after the third alien chapter to not skim. But she fit so much into a sentence that I was scared somewhere hiding would be a plot point (spoiler alert, there wasn't, skim away).
Then around the 180 page mark, a flip was switched, it was almost as if she went "crap, a story!" the adjective use was slimmed down dramatically and we actually got more than one chapter in a row with a plot point. But at this point, it was too late, the end of the book was hurdling at us and very little had happened and the book pretty much fizzled out with an "oh yeah, the Grand Prix happened". Mind you, the finale was very heartwarming and I liked it a lot. I just wish I hadn't had to read a full chapter about hairbrush interspecies sex to get there, and instead had more of it. But ironically, the hairbrush sex had more plot advancement that the majority of the book.
The ending did, however, for one moment, make me forget that I had just read an encyclopedia of descriptors and was happy for a few minutes. So good on her for that. That proves to me that she can write more than glittery descriptions, which then made me sad I didn't have more of that writing. With just a spattering of the gold of her opening chapters. I am glad I finished the book, the story, what little there was, was worth the read. However, I have no desire to read any other of Valente's writing now, and if there was a sequel, I just don't think I have it in me to read another 263 pages of description. Cool idea, good ability, just terribly executed. She could easily have released a separate book, expanding on a handful of species she established in the book, like an alien compendium, and I would have read it, and laughed, and been okay because I went into it expecting it. But I went into this wanting a story, not a neon throwup encyclopedia of just how "oh so creative" Valente is. That came off harsh, I know, but they blew past the fine line of interesting and well into the self-serving, look what I can do, territory. What suffered for it wasn't just a large number of DNFs, and my sanity for a few days, but an actually interesting, fun, Eurovision, glitter punk, heartwarming story about loss, life, how stupid it is, how beautiful it is, and why we should fight for it. It's in there, hiding beneath the layers and layers of word vomit. I want that story. Please release a second edition that is just that, the opening, and say... 3-5 of your favorite aliens Valente, I promise I'll give it another try if you do.
