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No Fourth River: A Novel Based on a True Story. A profoundly moving read about a woman's fight for survival.
No Fourth River: A Novel Based on a True Story. A profoundly moving read about a woman's fight for survival.
Christine Clayfield | 2017 | Biography, Philosophy, Psychology & Social Sciences
3
6.3 (3 Ratings)
Book Rating
Full review can be found on: www.diaryofdifference.com


 No Fourth River is a very powerful story about swimming up to surface, when the world is against you. A story about child abuse unlike anything else, and one very determined woman.
This is the second Audiobook I have listened to, with the first being Ready Player One. Two completely different experiences. It was disturbing listening to such a painful story for a while, and it took me a long time to finish it.

The story of Christine is so sad and so unique. She is being molested by her father in ways you could never imagine. She goes to boarding school and she is being bullied even by the nurses. She wets her bed every single day. And bad things keep happening, one after another, after another, until she is in her thirties and almost dies being beaten to almost-death by her husband.

And then she decides to change her life and to be the most successful woman.

At first, when I read the synopsis, the thing that thrilled me was the ill mother that suffered from dementia. I thought this book will revolve and focus on this point, but it didn’t. And I was very disappointed.

Then I manned up, and decided to continue listening, despite my unhappiness. It was a decent story, a powerful, motivational one, but not realistic. And it hurts me saying this, because this book is autobiography. Of course these terrible things happened. But I didn’t felt for the woman. Not in a way I usually would.

The writing was just about average, or maybe the woman reading in the audiobook was to blame. I will leave that up to you, who have listened to the audiobook, or choose to do so.

The character of this woman was honest, but I still can’t imagine how and why a person would stick to people that keep hurting her, despite everything. Even if love, even if forever after, I would not stay one more day with a person if he, for one moment, loses control and raises a hand over me. I would be out of the house in a minute, never returning back. A man would never hurt a woman. No matter what she could do, or couldn’t do. I can argue for hours, and I can admit being wrong, and I can cope with being yelled at, because I have done something stupid. But the moment the line is crosses, I would be out – FOREVER.

If you guys are looking for a story that will keep you thinking about whether you’ve made right decisions, this is a great book for you. A powerful success story of a woman that was brave enough to say NO (after a few years, that is) and brave enough to start building a new life. I recommend it, even though I personally did not really enjoy it a lot.

I have won this Audiobook as a giveaway from LibraryThing, and all my opinions are honest and completely unbiased.
  
Gridiron Gang (2006)
Gridiron Gang (2006)
2006 | Action, Drama
8
7.5 (2 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Often the true mark of cinema, this is the category where you will often find the majority of the award winners. The challenge of combining realistic yet sympathetic characters with gripping stories and emotional themes can be a true challenge, but when it works, this is where Hollywood truly shines.

In his latest film Gridiron Gang Dwayne Johnson, better known as the Rock has an appealing mix of sports action, drama, and comedy on his hands that will not only touch you, but will have you cheering.

The Rock stars as Sean Porter, a former college football star who works in a L.A. Area detention center for juvenile offenders. Saddened by the wasted lives of the young men, Sean looks for them to find an alternative to the life of crime, violence, and early death that so many of his inmates face.

With 75% of offenders likely to become repeat offenders, Sean decides to start a football team with the hope of teaching the young inmates the value of hard work, sacrifice, playing as a team, and duty.

Despite some initial obstacles from the system as well as school leagues hesitant to play against convicted offenders, the team son finds themselves with a full schedule and less than three weeks to go before their first game.

The hard practice and coaching style of Sean wears on the players, but they soon find themselves in their first game against a hardened and proven team which underscores just how much work they have to do.

As pressure mounts from all sides, Sean must find a way to meld his team into a winner and prove that this is a project worth doing and that the young men in his care are not lost causes, but are deserving of a new start.

While much of the film may play out as you would expect with the team coming together to play the big game, what is refreshing about the film is the solid performance of The Rock who shows that he is more than just an action star and is very capable of acting. He mixes his portrayal of Sean with equal amounts toughness and caring, to create what is easily his most mature and well defined character to date.

The supporting cast is good, especially Xzibit as Malcolm Moore, who provides a solid supporting presence to The Rock.

While the film is heavy on football action, it also does not shy away from giving the audience a glimpse of the life that the team comes from and how old rivalries and

hostilities can follow them even when they try to leave them behind with the best of intentions.

The action on the field is first-rate as the game choreography never lets up, and is easily the most accurate portrayal of the sport ever committed to film. You can tell that the cast is playing with heart and passion and not simply going through the motions.

Despite a few predictable moments, Gridiron Gang is a very pleasant surprise that is one of the years most enjoyable and satisfying films.
  
    The War Of Mine

    The War Of Mine

    Games

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Damn. by Kendrick Lamar
Damn. by Kendrick Lamar
2017 | Rhythm And Blues
Kendrick Lamar is an iconic hip-hop artist outta Compton, California. Not too long ago, he released his fourth studio album, entitled, “DAMN.”.

1) Kendrick Lamar – “BLOOD.”
Lamar tackles the issue of life and death. He poses several questions over a melodic instrumental produced by Lamar, Bēkon, and Anthony “Top Dawg” Tiffith. One of them being, “Are we gonna live or die?” Lamar tells a brilliant story about him walking down a block, and he sees a blind lady in search of something she had lost. He goes over to help, and then he asks, “Hello, ma’am, can I be of any assistance? It seems to me that you have lost something. I would like to help you find it.” She replied, “Oh yes, you have lost something. You’ve lost your life.” And then we hear a gunshot. Lamar is shot. Did he lose his life? The dire ending answers the probing question posed in the beginning—we gonna die.

2) Kendrick Lamar – “DNA.”
Lamar explains why his DNA differs from a sucker’s DNA. His deoxyribonucleic acid consists of going through the school of hard knocks. He endured a rugged street life, prisons, money, drugs, alcohol, sex, murder, mayhem, loyalty, royalty, joy, etc. This is because his DNA comprises of things shared collectively by African-Americans who have been through the struggle. Lyrically, Lamar leaves earth, while rapping over an explosive track produced by Mike WiLL Made-It. From beginning to end, he doesn’t take a bar off and shows why conscience rap has resurrected into the new norm.

3) Kendrick Lamar – “YAH.”
Lamar let it be known that he’s diagnosed with real ni^^a conditions, and keeps it a hunnit by calling out Geraldo Rivera because of criticism Lamar received from a FOX NEWS segment. The kid Capri intro adds a classic east coast authenticity over a laid-back track produced by Bēkon, Anthony “Top Dawg” Tiffith, Sounwave, and DJ Dahi. Preconceived lies told by White slave masters to African slaves are melting like hot butter in the sun. Lamar, a descendant of those slaves, has awakened and knows himself.

4) Kendrick Lamar – “ELEMENT.”
Lamar, who Capri calls the ‘New Kung Fu Kenny’, continues his Shaolin-rap assault over a Wu-Tang-like track produced by Bēkon, Tae Beast, James Blake, Sounwave, and Ricci Riera. Lamar is simply on another level than his peers. He’s been through more sh*t than them, and he’s ready to put the Bible down and go eye for an eye for this sh*t. When he said, “I been stomped out in front of my mama / my daddy commissary made it to commas / B*tch, all my grandmas dead / So, ain’t nobody prayin’ for me, I’m on your head.”

5) Kendrick Lamar – “FEEL.”
Lamar beautifully expresses how he feels on a dope Sounwave-produced track, where Lamar raps, “I feel like the whole world want me to pray for ’em / But who the f*ck prayin’ for me?” Lamar feels that nobody ain’t prayin’ for him, and this void has him with a chip on his shoulders, looking at life from a dark, and troubled point of view. He feels pain and doesn’t see hope. Did the incident with the blind lady cause him to feel this way? Why does he feel this way? Kendrick raps, “I feel like it ain’t no tomorrow f*ck the world / The world is endin’, I’m done pretendin’… I feel like this gotta be the feelin’ what ‘Pac was…”

But Lamar knows ill-thinking is bad for his health, and he acknowledges the source of his negative thinking, “The feelin’ is toxic, I feel like I’m boxin’ demons / Monsters, false prophets schemin’,” and the list goes on and on. If no one is, just know that we are praying for you Kendrick, YAH-willing.

6) Kendrick Lamar – “LOYALTY” (FEAT. RIHANNA.)
Lamar and Rihanna explore one of the key elements in Lamar’s DNA, loyalty; and they pose a simple question—who are you loyal to? Is it your family? Friends? Or yourself? Maybe it’s money, weed, or alcoholic? Where does it begin and where does it end? Lamar and Rihanna do a wonderful job over a beautify track produced by Anthony “Top Dawg” Tiffith, Terrace Martin, Sounwave, and DJ Dahi.

7) Kendrick Lamar – “PRIDE.”
The Steve Lacy’s intro, “Love’s gonna get you killed, but pride’s gonna be the death of you and me,” fits perfect in the scheme of things. Lamar, a spiritual intellectual, understands Proverbs 16: 18, which states, “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” So, Lamar uses those reference points to further expound his faith. In the beginning, Lamar’s love for the blind lady got him shot. And now, will his pride, the great satisfaction he feels when he reviews all that he has achieved, will that be the death of him? Over a smooth/laid-back track produced by Bēkon, Anthony “Top Dawg” Tiffith, and Steve Lacy, Lamar states that he can’t fake being humble, just because people are insecure.

He answers the question of pride
Lamar raps, “Sick venom in men and women overcome with pride. A perfect world is never perfect, only filled with lies. Promises are broken and more resentment come alive. Race barriers make inferior of you and I. See, in a perfect world, I’ll choose faith over riches. I’ll choose work over b*tches, I’ll make schools out of prison. I’ll take all the religions and put ‘em all in one service. Just to tell ’em we ain’t sh*t, but He’s been perfect.”

If Lamar maintains his Israelite faith over riches, and keep that equation as the top priority, he won’t be a victim of pride. But the question is—can Lamar remain humble amidst all the madness?

8) Kendrick Lamar – “HUMBLE.”
Lamar shows that being humble is easier said than done. Over a bouncy-head-nodding track produced by Mike WiLL Made-It, Lamar speaks his mind and gives zero f*cks on what people think about him. He’s braggadocios, confident, and asserts himself as the king of rap music. He sends a cryptic message to his competition, “Watch my soul speak, you let the meds talk. If I kill a ni^^a, it won’t be the alcohol. I’m the realest ni^^a after all, b*tch, be humble.”

9) Kendrick Lamar – “LUST.”
Lamar tackles the issue of lust, one of the main causes that fuel what we do. He begins by creating a scene, where lust has him trying to stick the tip of his phallus inside a woman’s vagina. She agrees, causing blood to run through his favorite vein. His logic, it doesn’t matter what you do—just make it count.

So, over a chilled- track produced by BADBADNOTGOOD, Sounwave, and DJ Dahi, Lamar raps, “Hop in the shower, put on your makeup, lace your weave up. Touch on yourself, call up your ni^^a, tell him he ain’t sh*t. Credit card scam, get you a Visa, make him pay your rent. Hop on the ‘Gram, flex on the b*tches that be hatin’ on you. Pop you a pill, call up your b*tches, have ‘em waitin’ on you. Go to the club, have you some fun, make that ass bounce. It’s whatever, just make it count.”

10) Kendrick Lamar – “LOVE.” (FEAT. ZACARI.)
Lamar turns the lights down over a contemporary R&B love song, produced by Anthony “Top Dawg” Tiffith, Greg Kurstin, Sounwave, and Teddy Walton. The theme of love and lust continues, but this time, into a more unchartered direction. Zacari’s melodic cadence compliments Kung Fu Kenny’s intimate love-lyrics to the love of his life, probably his fiancé Whitney Alford, Lamar’s high school sweetheart.

11) Kendrick Lamar – “XXX.” (FEAT. U2.)
Lamar gets political over an NWA-type track produced By Bēkon, Anthony “Top Dawg” Tiffith, DJ Dahi, Sounwave, and Mike WiLL Made-It. The theme is America and the plight and strife of young African-American males trying to make ends meet. Lamar talks about a man who calls him, needing prayer and advice because his son had been murdered. He wants to know what to do and seeks advice from Lamar because he’s anointed.

But Lamar doesn’t sugarcoat his advice. He tells the man straight up, “If somebody kills my son, that means somebody’s gettin’ killed.” Then, Lamar goes on to tell the man how he would go about doing the killing. America is an eye-for-an-eye nation, and forgiveness is hardly practiced.

12) Kendrick Lamar – “FEAR.”
Lamar deeps dig into his soul to confront his fears. He does so over a conversation track produced by The Alchemist. Lamar uses Deuteronomy 28:28 to make sense of his damnation, where the title track derived from. “The Lord shall smite thee with madness, and blindness, and astonishment of heart…,” states the biblical commandment. Lamar reasons that YAH cursed the Israelites (so-called Blacks, Hispanics, and Native American Indians) because of their iniquity. So, that explains their conditions in the wilderness of North America.

Pride
So, Lamar’s fear of lose it all like the biblical character forced him or scared him to not spend a dime. Not because he is cheap, but because he didn’t want to spend money because he feared running out of money, and going back to Section 8. Lamar raps, “30 shows a month and I still won’t buy me no Lexus.” Not a lot of people can say this.

13) Kendrick Lamar – “GOD.”
Lamar talks about the success that he doesn’t want to lose. He compares it to what it was like when he didn’t have fame and fortune. Even though he chooses faith over riches, he’s still feeling good laughing to the bank like aha. Over a laid-back track produced by Bēkon, Anthony “Top Dawg” Tiffith, Cardo, Sounwave, Ricci Riera, and DJ Dahi, Lamar tells listeners, “Don’t judge me,” because this is what God feels like. Matthew 7:1 states,

14) Kendrick Lamar – “DUCKWORTH.”
Lamar uses his last name, Duckworth, as a song to explain the relationship between his father, Ducky, and Anthony Tiffith, CEO of Top Dawg Entertainment. Lamar explained if Tiffith had killed Ducky, then he would be serving life, and Lamar would’ve grown up without a father. And there would have been no Top Dawg Entertainment, and probably no Kendrick Lamar.
  
Scythe (Arc of a Scythe #1)
Scythe (Arc of a Scythe #1)
Neal Shusterman | 2016 | Science Fiction/Fantasy, Young Adult (YA)
10
9.0 (22 Ratings)
Book Rating
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#1 <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2656699288">Scythe</a>; - ★★★★★
#2 <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2998629500">Thunderhead</a>; - ★★★★★
#3 <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/3080800725">The Toll</a> - ★★★★★

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Scythe by Neal Shusterman is my favourite read for 2019 so far! I had this book on my TBR shelf since last Christmas, I don’t even know why I waited so long to read it!

<b><i>“2042 is the year we conquered death, and also the year we stopped counting. Sure, we still numbered years for a few more decades, but at the moment of immortality, passing time ceased to matter.”</i></b>

In a perfect world, where immortality exists, the only way to die is to be gleaned by a scythe. Citra and Rowan are both living different normal lives, when they both have separate encounters with Scythe Faraday that will change their lives. They are both chosen to be his apprentice, a role neither of them wants to have.

<b><i>“Every child is told from the day he or she is old enough to understand that the scythes provide a crucial service for society. Ours is the closest thing to a sacred mission the modern world knows.”</i></b>

They have no choice, but to learn the art of gleaning – a word that has replaced killing many centuries ago, as it sounds better. Citra and Rowan are on their way to find out about the world of scythes, and what it takes to be one, and take on the terrifying responsibility of choosing their victims.

In a perfect world though, corruption still exists, and Citra and Rowan will have to join forces to defeat it. But one day, they are told that one of them has to kill the other…

<img src="https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/49756919_2262745213737085_5615474919803453440_n.jpg?_nc_cat=110&_nc_oc=AQkoqPoPl1eisjDoqn31z6Y15KstI6wZhbP5LJjjiyvG8OGBdP1ohu5FEv41nMNGD_CnITluEVGXyf5agIA-vyE5&_nc_ht=scontent-lht6-1.xx&oh=22d38a236c494f78f4c3ac26c8d31a2a&oe=5E2F74A8"/>;

Neal Shusterman is a maestro with his words and world building. He managed to create this dystopian world where good and evil exist, where we have beaten immortality and a big machine called the Thunderhead controls everything – apart from death. Because death is an act that must be performed by another human.

Every scythe must reach of quota of number of people to glean, and within that number there must be diversity and percentages met (a few fisherman, one Latino woman, one child, etc.) Each scythe has all the weapons available and all means in order to perform the gleaning, and it is up to them to choose the ways to do it. Some scythes are compassionate, and some scythes are brutal. And every day, all the scythes have to write an entry in their diary of their day, and this information is available to the public. And through Scythe Faraday, Scythe Curie and Scythe Goddard, we learn different personalities and see this responsibility, this gift (or is it a curse) from different points of view.

<b><i>“Was there ever a time when people weren’t plagued with boredom? A time when motivation wasn’t so hard to come by?”</i></b>

It is a great responsibility, deciding who lives and who dies, and performing the gleaning itself. That is why not everyone becomes a scythe. Not everyone can handle this responsibility.

I loved how through Citra and Rowan we learn a lot about the Scythe world, but also learn a lot about compassion and caring, about love and respect. And even though Citra and Rowan have different qualities, we can see them connect over at least one – compassion!

With an incredible plot, incredible world-building and unexpected plot twists – this is a book that has left me speechless many times. I don’t often highlight pages and quotes in books, but I did here. It left me wanting for more, and I couldn’t put it down until very late in the night. I was so engrossed by the whole Scythedom world, that I cannot wait to read the next one!

If you love Young-Adult Series, dystopian worlds, many amazing characters, love stories, quotes to remember for life and a little bit of spookiness – this is the book for you. This is what you have been waiting for all along. Go and grab it!

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GT
Gateway to Dreamworld
6
6.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Gateway to Dreamworld
by Brenda Estacio
Rating: 3.5/5

My Summary: Jean and Brad have a wonderful life with wonderful kids. But through several awful things that happen to them, like the car accident that put Pete in a wheelchair for his life and the depression that Brad experienced from it, the family has slipped apart. Jason, the oldest son, goes up into his hideout in the Lighthouse to try to escape the stress of his family falling apart. While up there, a stroke of lightning hits the lighthouse and creates a magical Gateway from the real world to Dreamworld, a place that only the pure of heart can access in their dreams. Jason has to decide whether or not he wants to stay in Dreamworld for the rest of his life, where everything is perfect and nobody gets sick or dies, or whether he wants to stay in the real world with his family. When Jason finds out that his mom is pregnant and ill, he is sure she is going to die. Then Jason finds out that he can save his mom and heal his brother by taking his family to Dreamworld—but he has to do it before the Gateway closes up forever…

My thoughts: Gateway to Dreamworld is an interesting yet odd read. It’s fast paced, covering a whole beginning of a relationship, two births, a death and a few other major events in the first few chapters and moving through important story lines very quickly—almost too quickly. I wished the author had slowed down and taken more time developing the story line in the first 100 pages, rather than just telling it all so fast—the first ten chapters or so felt rushed, as if she was in a hurry to get it over with and explain it so she could move on to what she wanted to write about. The pdf that I read from was 358 pages, and it got really interesting on chapter 13, page 118. That being said, it wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy the first 100 pages, they were very interesting and showed the life of a realistic family.

The only thing about this book that I didn’t like was that it had what I call “happy-land” syndrome—everything is working out perfectly, or is resolved too quickly. The father slipped into depression, and it was totally expected and realistic, however he was jerked out of it too fast (Maybe only people who have experienced depression can testify, but it doesn’t go away that quickly—it takes months of talking, treatment, and sometimes medication, not one talk with a pastor and a few tears.). When the grandma died, the character’s reactions were realistic—but family members “got over it” so fast that it left me frowning. This was all in the earliest part of the book, again I felt that the author just wanted to be done with the explaining part so she could move onto the interesting part.

Plot: this was a science fiction book, and it’s been a long time since I’ve read a sci fi. I loved getting lost in the idea of Dreamworld and The Gateway and the fear of the Unknown was horrific. During one of the crucial moments at the end of the book I could feel my blood speed up as I read it. The end of this book was a bit of a shock, not at all what I expected. I’m not sure if I was disappointed or satisfied, but it was certainly intriguing.

Characters: I personally didn’t connect with the characters very well because they were two adults and two young children, however my favorite character would have to be Pete, the little brother who gets paralyzed. He’s such a brave kid, trusting of his brother, and loving to his parents.

The Writing: The writing seemed very formal—I don’t think there was a single contraction in the whole book, and the character’s lines were detailed, specific, honest, and humble— they almost felt like robots the way they were never greedy, never mean. The word that came to mind as I read it was “quaint,” because it was told from third person omniscient perspective, and there wasn’t a lot of dialogue.

Recommendation: I think ages 9-14 would enjoy this book a lot more than I did (not to say I didn’t) because of the young characters and the science fiction aspect. However, there were a few scenes of husband and wife relationship that were not detailed, but were not suitable for an eleven or twelve-year-old either. It’s hard to place a specific age on this book, but I will say that anyone who read and enjoyed Madeleine L'Engle’s Many Waters (A Wrinkle In Time series) will enjoy this book as well.

All in all, I immensely enjoyed this book and found myself needing to finish it, I couldn’t stop in the middle. It was highly addicting and exciting, and I look forward to more from this author.

Thank You to Brenda Estacio for the e-book to review!

~Haleyknitz
  
The Dead Girls Club
The Dead Girls Club
8
9.3 (3 Ratings)
Book Rating
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The Dead Girls Club by Damien Angelica Walters left me unprepared for what I was about to read.

A perfect blend of mystery, spookiness, friendship and psychological trauma. This book will keep you away from social events until you are finished. And a few days after…

<i><b>Red Lady, Red Lady, show us your face…</b>

In 1991, Heather Cole and her friends were members of the Dead Girls Club. Obsessed with the macabre, the girls exchanged stories about serial killers and imaginary monsters, like the Red Lady, the spirit of a vengeful witch killed centuries before. Heather knew the stories were just that, until her best friend Becca began insisting the Red Lady was real – and she could prove it.

That belief got Becca killed.

It’s been nearly thirty years, but Heather has never told anyone what really happened that night–that Becca was right and the Red Lady was real. She’s done her best to put that fateful summer, Becca, and the Red Lady, behind her. Until a familiar necklace arrives in the mail, a necklace Heather hasn’t seen since the night Becca died.

The night Heather killed her.

Now, someone else knows what she did…and they’re determined to make Heather pay.</i>

From the beginning of the book, you can feel the intensity, the guilt and the mystery behind it, which was something I very much enjoy in my books. We get to see the life of Heather 30 years after the death of Becca, and we know from the very first chapter that Heather killed her.

But they were best friends. And Heather loves Becca, even now, with every atom of her body. They were those BFFs that were always together, and knew each other’s secrets. They both loved mystery and talking about serial killers. And then things somehow start to go wrong. They are slipping from the friendship slide, and they can’t do anything to stop it…

<i><b>The heart, the other half of which once hung around my neck, even after, is a cheap thing of nickel, stainless steel, or some inexpensive alloy. Originally affixed to a cardboard square and purchased by two girls who saved their allowance. Best Friends Forever. We meant it, she and I. We meant it with every bone in our bodies and every true and good thing in our souls. We didn’t know forever didn’t always last that long.</b></i>

This is one of the few stories where I rooted for a killer. I know how horrible it sounds, but I loved that perspective. The innocence behind a terrible act. The belief that what you did might have been wrong, but you still did it for the right reasons. The ultimate friendship and the boundaries.
I loved Heather, and I also loved Becca. I hated all the things that were standing between them, driving them further away from each other.

This is a book about a murder, and about a scary story becoming real. But this book is also about friendship, about psychological trauma, and about the force a person needs to get trough it. The crucial support this person requires to get through the rainy days. Heather was struggling, and there was no one beside her to help her. Everyone she knew and trusted suddenly abandoned her, and this tells a sad and realistic story about the reality people with mental health issues are facing. No one wants a damaged person in their lives, I get that. But when this person is your friend for life, when this person is your life companion, you know. You know how they were before it, and you should always be there to support them, and get them to become their healthy selves again. We all need a person in life that will push our boundaries and be there for us when we are not able to be there for ourselves.

The Dead Girls Club covers so many topics that warm and crush my heart. And I love it for it. If your book taste is similar to mine, I am sure you will love this book too, and I recommend it!

Huge thanks to Melissa and the team at Crooked Lane Books in the US, for sending me a paperback ARC copy in exchange for my honest review!

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