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The Mule (2018)
The Mule (2018)
2018 | Crime, Drama, Mystery
Eastwood is back, but is he hero or anti-hero?
It’s delightful to see Clint Eastwood back in front of the camera on the big screen. His last starring film was “Trouble with the Curve” in 2012 – a baseball-themed film that I don’t remember coming out in the UK, let alone remember seeing. Before that was 2008’s excellent “Gran Torino”.

Based on a true story.
“The Mule” is based on a true New York Times story about Leo Sharp, a veteren recruited by a cartel to ship drugs from the southern border to Chicago.

Eastwood couldn’t cast Sharp in the movie as himself because he died back in 2016, so had to personally take the role. (This is #satire…. Eastwood’s last film was the terrible “The 15:17 to Paris” where his ‘actors’ were the real-life participants themselves: you won’t find a review on this site as I only review films I’ve managed to sit through…. and with this one I failed!).

The plot.
Eastwood plays Earl Stone, a self-centred horticulturist of award-winning daylily’s (whatever they are) who is estranged from wife Mary (Dianne Wiest) and especially from his daughter Iris (Alison Eastwood, Clint’s own daughter), who now refuses to speak to him. This is because Earl has let his family down at every turn. The only person willing to give him a chance is his grand-daughter Ginny (Taissa Farmiga, younger sister of Vera). With his affairs in financial freefall, a chance meeting at a wedding leads Earl into a money-making driving job for the cartel operated by Laton (Andy Garcia). (Laton doesn’t seem to have a first name….. Fernando perhaps?).

With has beat-up truck and aged manner, he is invisible to the cops and so highly effective in the role. Even when – as the money keeps rolling in – he upgrades his truck to a souped-up monster!

Loose Morals.
It’s difficult to know whether Eastwood is playing a hero or an anti-hero. You feel tense when Earl is at risk of being caught, but then again the law officers would be preventing hundreds of kilos of cocaine from reaching the streets of Chicago and through their actions saving the lives of probably hundreds of people. I felt utterly conflicted: the blood of those people, and the destruction of the families that addiction causes, was on Earl’s hands as much as his employer’s. But you can’t quite equate that to the affable old-man that Eastwood portrays, who uses much of the money for charitable good-works in his community.

Family values.
In parallel with the drug-running main plot is a tale of Earl’s attempted redemption: “family should always come first”. When the two storylines come together around a critical event then it feels like a sufficient trigger for Earl to turn his back on his life of selfishness. This also gives room for some splendid acting scenes between Eastwood and Wiest. It’s also interesting that Earl tries to teach the younger DEA enforcement agent not to follow in the sins of his past. Bradley Cooper, back in pretty-boy mode, plays the agent, but seemed to me to be coasting; to me he wasn’t convincing in the role. Michael Peña is better as his unnamed DEA-buddy.

Final thoughts.
The showing at my cinema was surprisingly well-attended for a Wednesday night, showing that Eastwood is still a star-draw for box-office even in his old age. And it’s the reason to see the film for sure. His gristled driving turn to camera (most fully seen in the trailer rather than the final cut) is extraordinary.

He even manages to turn in an “eyes in rearview-mirror” shot that is surely a tribute to his Dirty Harry days!

If you can park your moral compass for a few hours then its an enjoyable film of drug-running and redemption. I’d like to suggest it also illustrates that crime really doesn’t pay, but from the end titles scene I’m not even sure at that age if that even applies!
  
Zombieland (2009)
Zombieland (2009)
2009 | Comedy, Horror
Columbus is a loner in every sense of the word. He usually spent his nights indoors playing World of Warcraft, so it's safe to say he probably didn't get out much. He wasn't even all that close to his family. So when the zombie apocalypse finally began to spread across the globe, Columbus already had an advantage over the majority of the population. In addition to that, Columbus had a lot of weird phobias (like clowns and those wet towels they use to wipe down tables at big restaurants). As his experience with the undead grew, so did his list of rules on how to survive in Zombieland. Columbus is on his way to Ohio, where his parents reside, hoping that by some miracle they're still alive. Before he can get very far, he runs into the first human face he's seen since the outbreak, Tallahassee. Tallahassee seems to be fearless, lives life in the moment, and worries about consequences later. His hatred for zombies bleeds through so much that his zombie killing ways are practically down to a fine art. What starts out as a potential ride to get him to his final destination could wind up being everything Columbus has ever wanted and that's a family that he feels comfortable with.

Zombieland somehow managed to breathe life into an aspect of horror I thought dried up along with George A. Romero's career and that's zombies. What started out as a fairly fresh idea has been milked dry with every situation going in every possibly way you could think of. You know Zombieland is going to be a bit different as soon as the movie begins. Columbus does a rundown of some of the most important rules he's learned while living in Zombieland leading up to the credits playing over slow-motion scenes of people being chased and eaten by zombies with "For Whom the Bell Tolls" by Metallica playing the entire time. The cinematography and the way the characters on screen interact with the letters in the opening credits is incredible. Blood splattering on the screen, glass shattering, and the way everything seems to be jumping out at you. To be honest, it's probably one of my favorite openings to any film ever.

Jesse Eisenberg's character Columbus immediately made me think of Michael Cera when I first saw the trailer. It's a role that's so similar to the roles he's played in the past and I found it kinda funny that a new trailer of Cera's was attached to this film. After that first reaction though, it didn't really bother me. In fact, the entire cast does an incredible job with the roles they play. Woody Harrelson is fantastic and steals a good portion of scenes as Tallahassee. With everything else going on, Tallahassee is on this quest to find a Twinkie and it's pretty hilarious watching him lose it whenever he can't find them. Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin as Wichita and Little Rock add more to the film when they're acting as a sisterly team rather than when they have scenes separately later on. Their cons are pretty spectacular and priceless in execution.

One of the most interesting factors of the film was something that made its way online two weeks before the film was even released. Zombieland originally started as a TV pilot. Before the cast we're familiar with now was set, Patrick Swayze was going to cameo as a zombie and there were several moments paying homage to Ghost that just sounded amazing and comical. They actually had several people in mind to cameo in the film. The actor they wound up going with is wonderful in their own right, gets plenty of screen time, and manages to steal quite a few laughs, but the Patrick Swayze zombie would've been just as good if not a bit better considering the circumstances.

The finale of the film that takes place in an amusement park is one of the best closing sequences to a zombie film ever. It's surprising no other zombie film has gone that route. The way the rides and carnival attractions are incorporated into zombie execution is marvelous in itself.

Zombieland is witty horror entertainment with a great cast and clever cinematography. A roller coaster ride you immediately want to ride again as soon as its over. What's surprising is it might just wind up being the best all around horror film to come out this year. As the tagline says, I strongly urge each and every one of you to "nut up or shut up."
  
On the Rocks
On the Rocks
2021 | Dice Game
I have to come clean right at the top of this one. I have not really tried a whole lot of different cocktails in my life. I have been mostly a beer kind of guy. Not that I am opposed to cocktails at all – in fact, I have really enjoyed most of the drinks I have tried. That said, I wish I was more hip so I would know all the drink lingo and really know why someone would want their concoction shaken and not stirred. So, I went into this one thinking I would learn the secret finally. But I didn’t. I did have a good time playing it though.

“On the Rocks is a marble drafting, cocktail recipe fulfillment game for 1-4 players. It is NOT a drinking game.” – straight from the game’s BGG page. So what does that mean? Well, this one is a variation of the “I cut, you choose” style game, but HEAVILY themed around bartending and enhanced with additional fun mechanics. The winner is the player who amasses the most amount of money by the end of their shift.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup, consult the rulebook, as there are many steps. However, once setup, the game should look similar to the photo below. Choose the starting player and the mixology competition can begin!
On the Rocks is played over several rounds with each player completing specific steps. The first step is optional, and is Tip Cards. Players will accumulate Tip Cards throughout the game, and each one features a special ability that may be used at this time. The next step may also be optional, depending on if the active player had received a Complaint card previously. Complaints must be completed on this step and is pretty much a wrench thrown in the plans by competitors.

Once these (possibly) optional steps have been completed the active player then takes the 2d6 and Rolls them. This number determines how many ingredient marbles are to be pulled from the bag and added into play. For the cost of one ingredient marble, the active player may manipulate the rolled dice by flipping it to its opposite face. Next, the player will Draft the number of marbles from the bag they rolled in the previous step. From these drafted marbles the player will Mix them into the blue Jigger Bowls in the middle of the table one at a time, a la Mancala (oh that’s fun to say: A LA MANCALA!). Then the player will Select & Place a jigger of marbles from the table onto their player board. Placing the corresponding marbles onto the drinks is how recipes can be completed. If any ingredients were selected from the jigger but not placed, the player must then place the ingredients into the Extra Ingredients shot glasses on the top portion of the player board, to Save for later use.

When the ingredient marbles have been placed and saved, the player must then complete the Resolve step. Several ingredient marbles are “Premium” or “Spill” marbles. Premium marbles (golden) allow the player to select ANY two ingredients from the draw bag and the Premium marble is then discarded to the coaster in the middle of the table. The black Spill marble forces the active player to draw a Spill card from the deck and complete its action. It also during the Resolve step that the player may complete a recipe card by discarding the drink’s ingredients to the bag and flipping its recipe card face-down. If the entire order (all of the face-up recipe cards) is completed, the active player’s round ends and they notate this by placing one of the three lemon tokens on their player board. Some round end cleanup is performed, like drawing another set of 3 or 4 drink recipes for an order, and the player’s turn is over.


Once a player has completed their third order of drinks, they must indicate “Last Call” to the other players at the table. This informs the other players that they have one last turn to earn any extra money before the game ends. When the game has been finished, final scoring is performed and the winner is they who earned the most money throughout the night. The other players must immediately fix the winner a drink, or buy the winner a shot. Okay, those aren’t in the rulebook, but merely suggestions for the revised second edition…
Components. For those that follow our reviews, you know I am a sucker for games with great components, and this one definitely delivers for me. The aesthetics and art style are just perfect, the double-layer boards are always lovely, and the rubber jiggers are excellent. I cannot see anything that can be improved in terms of components, and I completely expected that because this was published by Pentree Games and 25th Century Games (one of my favorite publishers in the business). The game looks and feels deluxe, which is VERY satisfying.

I think that the Pittre duo of Michael and Christina really knocked it out of the park with this one. Wait, this is their first game design?? And it’s incredible? Okay okay, I’ll be keeping my eye on you two. On the Rocks is a light game with excellent table presence and some difficult choices presented. Now, the choices may be TOOOOOO difficult for some gamers, especially our AP-prone players. Carefully planning out each ingredient’s distribution into the jigger bowls can send them into a frenzy, so I have advised to choose one or two bowls they wish to buff and concentrate on hitting those with the marbles they want, and just randomly place the other ingredients. I know that is a big ask, but this game is supposed to take 45-90 minutes, not 45-90 hours. My other gripe about the game is the color-dependence of the ingredient marbles. I am sorry to all my colorblind friends out there, but I am unable to see how you might keep a possible 12 different marbles straight in your heads while simultaneously remembering the state of marbles in each jigger bowl. I hope I am completely wrong, as I do not suffer from colorblindness, and please do let me know if this is still playable for those gamers.

These gripes aside, everything else about the game is fabulous. I love being able to manipulate my dice rolls (yes, with a cost) to have ultimate control of the number of marbles pulled from the bag. That bag, however, takes control away immediately unless I draft a bunch of clear (wild) or golden marbles to affect my final placements. I also adore struggling to choose which recipes to concentrate on first, and weighing the possibilities of completing the higher value recipes, or blitzing the smaller ones first.

Oh, and the Spills cards? They can be real pains in the booty. These effectively give the active player the ability to completely botch another players’ plans by discarding their ingredient marbles from their player board. Not enough player interaction? How about negative Tip cards, which are earned by completing a recipe, that impede a competitor’s progress by making them complete the Tip card before being able to move on with their plans, or by limiting their marble selection to two instead of the entire bowl? Yeah, this has player interaction for sure.

Again, I like a good drink now and then, just as much as the next person. However, I have never been a bartender, and I do not plan on ever becoming one. I could not ever imagine having to compete with other bartenders for tip money either, especially if it is as brutally cutthroat as On the Rocks portrays it to be. I will, however, play a game where all that “fun” is diluted to dice, cards, and marbles. I was looking through my collection recently and noticed have embarrassingly few games with an adult beverage theme. If you are like me and require more games depicting fun with alcohol, then I strongly urge you to check out On the Rocks. I feel like I can finally graduate from Fuzzy Navels and Stone Sours just by playing this game and really upping my liquor acumen. Purple Phoenix Games gives this one a delicious 5 / 6. It seems readily available for consumption, but please do not try to go drink for drink with this game. It’s not designed to be a drinking game… or is it?