Search

Search only in certain items:

If I Can’t Have You
If I Can’t Have You
Charlotte Levin | 2020 | Contemporary, Fiction & Poetry, Mystery, Romance, Thriller
9
9.0 (2 Ratings)
Book Rating
If I Can’t Have You is a story about obsession. It’s funny, serious, disturbing and at times, outrageous. Constance could be a character that would be easy to dislike, but I liked her vulnerability. She is a sad character who has had a troubled upbringing. When she believes that she has found the love of her life, and is then almost immediately let down by the frankly despicable Dr. Samuel Stevens, I felt so sorry for her. And continued to feel for her as he repeatedly uses her. He clearly neither knows or cares about Constance’s depth of feeling for him. She seems desperate as she lets him use her, and even more so as she looks for affection with her housemate, Dale. He certainly seems to have the potential to be a male version of Constance, and it’s clear that she actually feels revulsion with regards to him. But at the same time, she doesn’t want to be on her own.

I think the character of Edward, an elderly man who lives over the road from Samuel, is in part the father figure that she needs and never had. He needs her too. I think things could have been far worse for Constance if she hadn’t have had Edward to consider. Edward is the device that shows Constance is a caring person underneath the obsession. She makes time in her day to care for and visit him. Like the other two men, he is a broken soul - but his obsessive behaviour doesn’t translate in to being careless with people. Instead he is a hoarder of strange knick-knacks. Edward adds an element of humour as well - his relationship with Constance is lovely.

I found it hard NOT to put myself in Constance’s shoes. After all, isn’t that what we as readers do with the characters we read about? How easy would i be to slip from loneliness in to obsession? I hope I never find out, but it’s so well portrayed in this book. This is a supremely uncomfortable book in parts - Constance is used and abused, and she in turn can have some pretty unpleasant thoughts. But perhaps that’s because she doesn’t have someone to really confide in?

I can’t actually believe that this is a debut, and I will definitely be looking out for whatever comes next from Charlotte Levin.

Many thanks to The Pigeonhole for serialising this and to Charlotte for joining in with the chat in the margins!