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Lyndsey Gollogly (2893 KP) rated Siren Condemned (Thief of Hearts #1) in Books
Feb 25, 2021
30 of 250
Kindle
Siren condemned ( Thief of Hearts book 1)
By C.R. Jane and Mila Young
Once read a review will be written via Smashbomb and link posted in comments
One man will break me. One will lead me to sin. And one will kill me to save me.
The sirens have been hunted for so long that we no longer remember our pasts...
Our songs have been stolen, the source of all our power, and it's been made punishable by death to use it. They've taken everything from us.
The vampires.
I've been sent to the darkest of all places, Nightmare Penitentiary, for my disobedience to my masters. But I've promised myself that I’ll be free someday.. no matter the cost. I'll do whatever it takes to regain my power, even if I end up shattering the hearts of three captivating men who have the power to change my future forever.
It started of a bit dodgy I wasn’t sure I’d continue but I game it the benefit of doubt. It was ok I feel like something was missing which is a shame as it showed promise! Hopefully the series will get better.
Kindle
Siren condemned ( Thief of Hearts book 1)
By C.R. Jane and Mila Young
Once read a review will be written via Smashbomb and link posted in comments
One man will break me. One will lead me to sin. And one will kill me to save me.
The sirens have been hunted for so long that we no longer remember our pasts...
Our songs have been stolen, the source of all our power, and it's been made punishable by death to use it. They've taken everything from us.
The vampires.
I've been sent to the darkest of all places, Nightmare Penitentiary, for my disobedience to my masters. But I've promised myself that I’ll be free someday.. no matter the cost. I'll do whatever it takes to regain my power, even if I end up shattering the hearts of three captivating men who have the power to change my future forever.
It started of a bit dodgy I wasn’t sure I’d continue but I game it the benefit of doubt. It was ok I feel like something was missing which is a shame as it showed promise! Hopefully the series will get better.
Lyndsey Gollogly (2893 KP) rated Siren Awakened ( Thief of Hearts book 3) in Books
Mar 27, 2023
36 of 235
Kindle
Siren Awakened ( Thief of Hearts book 3)
By C.R. Jane and Mila Young
⭐️⭐️⭐️
🌶️🌶️
What happens to a siren who's come back from the dead?
I hope I get the chance to find out.
I've been betrayed, destroyed by the three men that I'd given my trust.
I'm alone again in this place... a place that's darker than hell.
And worse, something strange is happening to me. Something that has me wondering if I can even trust myself.
There are so many secrets in these walls, and I'm now determined to find them all out.
I'm done playing nice. This siren's going to sing once again.
Nightmare Penitentiary doesn't know what's coming.
One will risk the safety of our future. One will reveal a heartbreaking betrayal. One will bring out my own demons. And one might just be the savior I've been looking for.
Don't outstay your time at Nightmare Penitentiary. Some places you just don't survive.
It was good think a little rushed in places but a decent read. I do like this idea of all the monsters locked up together and still causing mayhem.
Kindle
Siren Awakened ( Thief of Hearts book 3)
By C.R. Jane and Mila Young
⭐️⭐️⭐️
🌶️🌶️
What happens to a siren who's come back from the dead?
I hope I get the chance to find out.
I've been betrayed, destroyed by the three men that I'd given my trust.
I'm alone again in this place... a place that's darker than hell.
And worse, something strange is happening to me. Something that has me wondering if I can even trust myself.
There are so many secrets in these walls, and I'm now determined to find them all out.
I'm done playing nice. This siren's going to sing once again.
Nightmare Penitentiary doesn't know what's coming.
One will risk the safety of our future. One will reveal a heartbreaking betrayal. One will bring out my own demons. And one might just be the savior I've been looking for.
Don't outstay your time at Nightmare Penitentiary. Some places you just don't survive.
It was good think a little rushed in places but a decent read. I do like this idea of all the monsters locked up together and still causing mayhem.
The Queen of Hearts' Tale
This eBook was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review
Before she was the Queen of Hearts she was just a girl who wanted to fall in love. When Marissa Meyer finished writing The Lunar Chronicles, a series of books loosely based on fairytales, everyone wondered what she would do next. Continuing along the lines of using famous stories, Meyer has devoted an entire novel to Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. With thousands of references to the original tale, and a couple of other works too, Heartless is perfect for fans of Carroll’s salient characters.
Unlike most retellings, Meyer has focused on events prior to Alice’s accidental discovery of Wonderland. The resulting novel is essentially a theory as to how the characters turned out the way they did in the original story published in 1865. Drawing attention to the predestined Queen of Hearts, a young woman named Catherine, readers discover a reason for her development into an infamous villain.
Lady Catherine Pinkerton is completely unlike the character she is fated to be. She is a kind, thoughtful girl whose greatest wish is to open her own bakery. Unfortunately, this dream is just that, a dream. With the asinine King of Hearts resolved to marry her, there is little Cath can do to avoid her royal future. At first it may appear odd that Cath is so against marrying the ruler of Hearts, but she soon makes it clear she would much rather marry for love. So, when the court joker, Jest – a similar character to the legendary Hatter – catches her eye, Catherine becomes determined to control her own future.
Heartless is a humourous, yet romantic, young adult novel, full of both well-known and new characters. Set in a world with morals similar to the Victorian era, it works extremely well as a prequel to Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Catherine is an admirable, feministic character who readers will struggle to believe will become such a notorious Queen. What could possibly happen to vastly alter her personality? Similarly, what is it that makes the Hatter go mad, and who is Jest? Being a character unique to this novel, there is a foreboding sense that this joker, and his poetry reciting raven – cue Edgar Allan Poe references – suffer a horrible demise.
Unlike Marissa Meyer’s previous books where the fairytales were not so obvious, the storyline in Heartless perfectly joins up with Lewis Carroll’s imagination. With references to mock turtles, the Jabberwock and other minor characters, there is so much to discover in Meyer’s interpretation of Wonderland – it even clears up a couple of scenarios from the original tale that may have bamboozled readers initially.
Admittedly, Heartless takes a little while to get going, but once it has, it is difficult to put down. Fans of Marissa Meyer may be disappointed that she did not stick to her futuristic storytelling, however all Alice enthusiasts will fall in love with this book – and probably with Jest as well. Overall, Heartless is a delightful book that reignites our inner childish imagination.
Before she was the Queen of Hearts she was just a girl who wanted to fall in love. When Marissa Meyer finished writing The Lunar Chronicles, a series of books loosely based on fairytales, everyone wondered what she would do next. Continuing along the lines of using famous stories, Meyer has devoted an entire novel to Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. With thousands of references to the original tale, and a couple of other works too, Heartless is perfect for fans of Carroll’s salient characters.
Unlike most retellings, Meyer has focused on events prior to Alice’s accidental discovery of Wonderland. The resulting novel is essentially a theory as to how the characters turned out the way they did in the original story published in 1865. Drawing attention to the predestined Queen of Hearts, a young woman named Catherine, readers discover a reason for her development into an infamous villain.
Lady Catherine Pinkerton is completely unlike the character she is fated to be. She is a kind, thoughtful girl whose greatest wish is to open her own bakery. Unfortunately, this dream is just that, a dream. With the asinine King of Hearts resolved to marry her, there is little Cath can do to avoid her royal future. At first it may appear odd that Cath is so against marrying the ruler of Hearts, but she soon makes it clear she would much rather marry for love. So, when the court joker, Jest – a similar character to the legendary Hatter – catches her eye, Catherine becomes determined to control her own future.
Heartless is a humourous, yet romantic, young adult novel, full of both well-known and new characters. Set in a world with morals similar to the Victorian era, it works extremely well as a prequel to Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Catherine is an admirable, feministic character who readers will struggle to believe will become such a notorious Queen. What could possibly happen to vastly alter her personality? Similarly, what is it that makes the Hatter go mad, and who is Jest? Being a character unique to this novel, there is a foreboding sense that this joker, and his poetry reciting raven – cue Edgar Allan Poe references – suffer a horrible demise.
Unlike Marissa Meyer’s previous books where the fairytales were not so obvious, the storyline in Heartless perfectly joins up with Lewis Carroll’s imagination. With references to mock turtles, the Jabberwock and other minor characters, there is so much to discover in Meyer’s interpretation of Wonderland – it even clears up a couple of scenarios from the original tale that may have bamboozled readers initially.
Admittedly, Heartless takes a little while to get going, but once it has, it is difficult to put down. Fans of Marissa Meyer may be disappointed that she did not stick to her futuristic storytelling, however all Alice enthusiasts will fall in love with this book – and probably with Jest as well. Overall, Heartless is a delightful book that reignites our inner childish imagination.
<i>This eBook was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review
Before she was the Queen of Hearts she was just a girl who wanted to fall in love. </i>When Marissa Meyer finished writing <i>The Lunar Chronicles</i>, a series of books loosely based on fairytales, everyone wondered what she would do next. Continuing along the lines of using famous stories, Meyer has devoted an entire novel to Lewis Carroll’s <i>Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland</i>. With thousands of references to the original tale, and a couple of other works too, Heartless is perfect for fans of Carroll’s salient characters.
Unlike most retellings, Meyer has focused on events prior to Alice’s accidental discovery of Wonderland. The resulting novel is essentially a theory as to how the characters turned out the way they did in the original story published in 1865. Drawing attention to the predestined Queen of Hearts, a young woman named Catherine, readers discover a reason for her development into an infamous villain.
Lady Catherine Pinkerton is completely unlike the character she is fated to be. She is a kind, thoughtful girl whose greatest wish is to open her own bakery. Unfortunately, this dream is just that, a dream. With the asinine King of Hearts resolved to marry her, there is little Cath can do to avoid her royal future. At first it may appear odd that Cath is so against marrying the ruler of Hearts, but she soon makes it clear she would much rather marry for love. So, when the court joker, Jest – a similar character to the legendary Hatter – catches her eye, Catherine becomes determined to control her own future.
<i>Heartless</i> is a humorous, yet romantic, young adult novel, full of both well-known and new characters. Set in a world with morals similar to the Victorian era, it works extremely well as a prequel to <i>Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland</i>. Catherine is an admirable, feministic character who readers will struggle to believe will become such a notorious Queen. What could possibly happen to vastly alter her personality? Similarly, what is it that makes the Hatter go mad, and who is Jest? Being a character unique to this novel, there is a foreboding sense that this joker, and his poetry reciting raven – cue Edgar Allan Poe references – suffer a horrible demise.
Unlike Marissa Meyer’s previous books where the fairytales were not so obvious, the storyline in <i>Heartless</i> perfectly joins up with Lewis Carroll’s imagination. With references to mock turtles, the Jabberwock and other minor characters, there is so much to discover in Meyer’s interpretation of Wonderland – it even clears up a couple of scenarios from the original tale that may have bamboozled readers initially.
Admittedly, <i>Heartless</i> takes a little while to get going, but once it has, it is difficult to put down. Fans of Marissa Meyer may be disappointed that she did not stick to her futuristic storytelling, however all Alice enthusiasts will fall in love with this book – and probably with Jest as well. Overall, <i>Heartless</i> is a delightful book that reignites our inner childish imagination.
Before she was the Queen of Hearts she was just a girl who wanted to fall in love. </i>When Marissa Meyer finished writing <i>The Lunar Chronicles</i>, a series of books loosely based on fairytales, everyone wondered what she would do next. Continuing along the lines of using famous stories, Meyer has devoted an entire novel to Lewis Carroll’s <i>Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland</i>. With thousands of references to the original tale, and a couple of other works too, Heartless is perfect for fans of Carroll’s salient characters.
Unlike most retellings, Meyer has focused on events prior to Alice’s accidental discovery of Wonderland. The resulting novel is essentially a theory as to how the characters turned out the way they did in the original story published in 1865. Drawing attention to the predestined Queen of Hearts, a young woman named Catherine, readers discover a reason for her development into an infamous villain.
Lady Catherine Pinkerton is completely unlike the character she is fated to be. She is a kind, thoughtful girl whose greatest wish is to open her own bakery. Unfortunately, this dream is just that, a dream. With the asinine King of Hearts resolved to marry her, there is little Cath can do to avoid her royal future. At first it may appear odd that Cath is so against marrying the ruler of Hearts, but she soon makes it clear she would much rather marry for love. So, when the court joker, Jest – a similar character to the legendary Hatter – catches her eye, Catherine becomes determined to control her own future.
<i>Heartless</i> is a humorous, yet romantic, young adult novel, full of both well-known and new characters. Set in a world with morals similar to the Victorian era, it works extremely well as a prequel to <i>Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland</i>. Catherine is an admirable, feministic character who readers will struggle to believe will become such a notorious Queen. What could possibly happen to vastly alter her personality? Similarly, what is it that makes the Hatter go mad, and who is Jest? Being a character unique to this novel, there is a foreboding sense that this joker, and his poetry reciting raven – cue Edgar Allan Poe references – suffer a horrible demise.
Unlike Marissa Meyer’s previous books where the fairytales were not so obvious, the storyline in <i>Heartless</i> perfectly joins up with Lewis Carroll’s imagination. With references to mock turtles, the Jabberwock and other minor characters, there is so much to discover in Meyer’s interpretation of Wonderland – it even clears up a couple of scenarios from the original tale that may have bamboozled readers initially.
Admittedly, <i>Heartless</i> takes a little while to get going, but once it has, it is difficult to put down. Fans of Marissa Meyer may be disappointed that she did not stick to her futuristic storytelling, however all Alice enthusiasts will fall in love with this book – and probably with Jest as well. Overall, <i>Heartless</i> is a delightful book that reignites our inner childish imagination.
Kristy H (1252 KP) rated Beyond the Point in Books
Jun 21, 2019
Hannah, Dani, and Avery meet at West Point, the U.S. Military Academy. Together, they are going to face four difficult years--at a tough military academy that is even harder on women. Through the adversity, the three will forge a tight friendship. Dani has come to play basketball, but her body may not be on board with that plan. Hannah comes from a military family, but even her own grandfather isn't sure he wants Hannah at West Point. But Hannah forges ahead anyway, and at school, she meets Tim, the love of her life. And finally, there's Avery, who has come to West Point to escape her tough parents and get a free education. But once there, she finds the strict rules harder to follow than expected, especially when she can't help breaking a few hearts along the way. Hannah, Dani, and Avery are coming of age at West Point in the era of 9/11, facing war together, along with love, heartbreak, and more. Can their friendship survive all these things?
This book took me forever to read; it's very long and detailed, starting with the girls arriving at West Point and going much past it. It actually begins with a series of emails, then dips back to West Point. I have somewhat mixed feelings about this novel, which is very sweeping in its content. I never felt a deep desire to get back and pick it up, but when reading it, found it interesting and compelling.
Hannah, Dani, and Avery are intriguing characters, though it took me a little while to tell them apart. At times, they seemed a bit cliched. Other times, they seemed very in-depth. It was very interesting to read a book that went into such detail about military life. (While West Point clearly offered a chance at great friendships and future success, it seemed really scary sometimes!) It offers a lot of heartfelt moments, and I think it truly gave some insight to what military families go through.
Overall, I liked this one - it was a very different read, and I really enjoyed the chance to read a book set at West Point. It's very poignant and often heartbreaking. It felt a bit long and uneven at times, but still very strong for a debut novel. 3+ stars.
This book took me forever to read; it's very long and detailed, starting with the girls arriving at West Point and going much past it. It actually begins with a series of emails, then dips back to West Point. I have somewhat mixed feelings about this novel, which is very sweeping in its content. I never felt a deep desire to get back and pick it up, but when reading it, found it interesting and compelling.
Hannah, Dani, and Avery are intriguing characters, though it took me a little while to tell them apart. At times, they seemed a bit cliched. Other times, they seemed very in-depth. It was very interesting to read a book that went into such detail about military life. (While West Point clearly offered a chance at great friendships and future success, it seemed really scary sometimes!) It offers a lot of heartfelt moments, and I think it truly gave some insight to what military families go through.
Overall, I liked this one - it was a very different read, and I really enjoyed the chance to read a book set at West Point. It's very poignant and often heartbreaking. It felt a bit long and uneven at times, but still very strong for a debut novel. 3+ stars.
Hazel (1853 KP) rated Stork Mountain in Books
May 25, 2017
Captivating
I received this book for free through Goodreads First Reads.
Bulgarian-born, short storywriter Miroslav Penkov has turned to full-length novels with this captivating book, Stork Mountain. Set in the Bulgarian Strandja Mountains on the border of Turkey, he explores religion, mythology, the past and the present in a society affected by long-term political unrest.
The narrator, a young man who remains nameless throughout, relocated to the United States of America as a child after the fall of Communism. Now he returns to his home country to find his grandfather, an elderly man he lost contact with three years ago. However his real motive is purely for self gain: to sell his section of the family land in order to pay off student loans and his rising debt.
Naturally, things do not go according to plan. The protagonist finds his grandfather hiding in the village of Klisura, a place divided between the Christians and the Muslims. He also discovers that there is no longer any land for him to sell, making his journey fairly pointless. Instead of returning to the Western world, he stays in his grandfather’s house and, very slowly, begins to learn the truth about his family’s past, the man his grandfather once was, and the superstitious pagan activities still affecting some of the village’s inhabitants today.
Stork Mountain is full of the history, folklore and mythology of a little known about European country. Although ultimately a contemporary novel, there is a lot to learn about events that led up to southern Bulgaria’s current condition. As well as being informative, Penkov plays with his readers’ hearts by including a Romeo and Juliet-esque relationship between the narrator and a Muslim girl, and also reveals a similar affair between a younger Grandfather and the girl of his dreams.
Books containing politics are often reserved for those with particular interest in the topic, however Stork Mountain is suitable for a much larger audience. The inclusion of Bulgarian folklore adds a dark fairytale-like quality to the story; and the romance, something for the reader to latch onto.
On reading the blurb I jumped to the conclusion that this book would be boring. I was wrong. Whereas stories with similar themes can be hard going, Stork Mountain was fast paced and easy to read. There were a few confusions about who was talking or whether the narrative was about the past or the future, but these issues may be something that is improved upon as the author finds his groove in full-length novels.
Even if, like me, you have prejudged this book to be boring, I urge you to give it a go. You may find yourself pleasantly surprised. Miroslav Penkov definitely has a future in the world of literature.
Bulgarian-born, short storywriter Miroslav Penkov has turned to full-length novels with this captivating book, Stork Mountain. Set in the Bulgarian Strandja Mountains on the border of Turkey, he explores religion, mythology, the past and the present in a society affected by long-term political unrest.
The narrator, a young man who remains nameless throughout, relocated to the United States of America as a child after the fall of Communism. Now he returns to his home country to find his grandfather, an elderly man he lost contact with three years ago. However his real motive is purely for self gain: to sell his section of the family land in order to pay off student loans and his rising debt.
Naturally, things do not go according to plan. The protagonist finds his grandfather hiding in the village of Klisura, a place divided between the Christians and the Muslims. He also discovers that there is no longer any land for him to sell, making his journey fairly pointless. Instead of returning to the Western world, he stays in his grandfather’s house and, very slowly, begins to learn the truth about his family’s past, the man his grandfather once was, and the superstitious pagan activities still affecting some of the village’s inhabitants today.
Stork Mountain is full of the history, folklore and mythology of a little known about European country. Although ultimately a contemporary novel, there is a lot to learn about events that led up to southern Bulgaria’s current condition. As well as being informative, Penkov plays with his readers’ hearts by including a Romeo and Juliet-esque relationship between the narrator and a Muslim girl, and also reveals a similar affair between a younger Grandfather and the girl of his dreams.
Books containing politics are often reserved for those with particular interest in the topic, however Stork Mountain is suitable for a much larger audience. The inclusion of Bulgarian folklore adds a dark fairytale-like quality to the story; and the romance, something for the reader to latch onto.
On reading the blurb I jumped to the conclusion that this book would be boring. I was wrong. Whereas stories with similar themes can be hard going, Stork Mountain was fast paced and easy to read. There were a few confusions about who was talking or whether the narrative was about the past or the future, but these issues may be something that is improved upon as the author finds his groove in full-length novels.
Even if, like me, you have prejudged this book to be boring, I urge you to give it a go. You may find yourself pleasantly surprised. Miroslav Penkov definitely has a future in the world of literature.
Sensitivemuse (246 KP) rated You Are Not Alone in Books
Mar 4, 2020
Better Than Anonymous Girl
Contains spoilers, click to show
Spoilers in Effect. You’ve been warned.
So I read the first two books by these lovely authors, loved The Wife Between Us. Didn’t really like An Anonymous Girl. So although I didn’t set the bar too high this time around it’s always worth giving them another chance. Luckily I’m glad I did. I did quite enjoy this one and loved the little twists and turns that got me going.
Shay isn’t likable. But she’s not one to underestimate either. She’s quirky and may seem a bit off and not so socially inclined but she may be one of those types of people where you once get to know them, they seem to be pleasant to be around with. Now I’m not quite sure why she had to lie to the sisters like that in the first place. Did she feel that awkward? She had so many opportunities to come clean but decided to continue the lie. I’m not sure if that was because we still want her flawed or it was just a plot hook to keep the story going. Nevertheless it was just odd how she just continued the lie (although it would have changed the story, but it might have changed for the better?)
I loved the Moore sisters despite their manipulative behavior. I’d rather hoped there was more backstory to them instead of the little breadcrumbs here and there but the twist behind it was so good! I definitely was not expecting that! What I didn’t appreciate was they could have used Shay’s skills! It was infuriating! They were just so hung up on her lying (which was stupid of Shay to do it to begin with) that they couldn’t see how much value she would bring to the group. Can you just imagine what this group can do if Shay was a part of them? It would have been a completely different novel but perhaps a good one.
The plot itself is good. The intrigue and the twists and turns are there, perhaps not as much as I would like as I’ve read their previous works in the past. The back and forth between points of view was good and a breadcrumb trail is set throughout the storyline to keep you wanting to read more. Love that twist in the end but I have to admit, the ending could have been better. Sure the Moore sisters had good interests in mind, but whether their hearts were in it, maybe not so much.
Loved this book and was happy with it. It’s so much better than the last one and brings me back to wanting to read more of these two authors in the future.
So I read the first two books by these lovely authors, loved The Wife Between Us. Didn’t really like An Anonymous Girl. So although I didn’t set the bar too high this time around it’s always worth giving them another chance. Luckily I’m glad I did. I did quite enjoy this one and loved the little twists and turns that got me going.
Shay isn’t likable. But she’s not one to underestimate either. She’s quirky and may seem a bit off and not so socially inclined but she may be one of those types of people where you once get to know them, they seem to be pleasant to be around with. Now I’m not quite sure why she had to lie to the sisters like that in the first place. Did she feel that awkward? She had so many opportunities to come clean but decided to continue the lie. I’m not sure if that was because we still want her flawed or it was just a plot hook to keep the story going. Nevertheless it was just odd how she just continued the lie (although it would have changed the story, but it might have changed for the better?)
I loved the Moore sisters despite their manipulative behavior. I’d rather hoped there was more backstory to them instead of the little breadcrumbs here and there but the twist behind it was so good! I definitely was not expecting that! What I didn’t appreciate was they could have used Shay’s skills! It was infuriating! They were just so hung up on her lying (which was stupid of Shay to do it to begin with) that they couldn’t see how much value she would bring to the group. Can you just imagine what this group can do if Shay was a part of them? It would have been a completely different novel but perhaps a good one.
The plot itself is good. The intrigue and the twists and turns are there, perhaps not as much as I would like as I’ve read their previous works in the past. The back and forth between points of view was good and a breadcrumb trail is set throughout the storyline to keep you wanting to read more. Love that twist in the end but I have to admit, the ending could have been better. Sure the Moore sisters had good interests in mind, but whether their hearts were in it, maybe not so much.
Loved this book and was happy with it. It’s so much better than the last one and brings me back to wanting to read more of these two authors in the future.
Purple Phoenix Games (2266 KP) rated Quests & Cannons in Tabletop Games
May 17, 2021
Fantasy Yarharrr! The isles have been borne and offer wondrous resources, but only for one o’ ye. Gather yer factions and fight for control and survival, or suffer a fate worse than death… which, in this case, is extinction! Okay, this is way less dramatic, but the stakes are high when bunnies, eagles, and piggies battle on the high seas for control of the islands and assurance of their race’s survival.
Quests & Cannons is a giant melting pot of mechanics rolled up into a cute little package with an interesting modular board with multiple setup options. In it, players take control of one of the aforementioned animal races and board their ships to claim islands and exploit their resources. The first player to amass 15 or 20 prosperity (VP) by the end of the game will reign victorious!
DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and I do not know for sure if the final components will be any different from these shown. Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game, as there are just too many. You are invited to download the rulebook, back the game through the Kickstarter campaign, or through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T
There are so many steps to setup, and about a thousand bits and pieces, so I will save both your eyes and my fingers explaining. However, once setup, it should look somewhat similar to the photo below. Each player receives their own upgradeable ship board to track resources, action points, and other game-necessary components, along with a specific character and matching boat token.
On a turn, players will have three action points they may spend in any order on the following actions: Movement, Gather, Attack. Movement is one nautical hex in any direction per action point used, unless a player uses one of their sails. Sails add one hex to a movement and is spent for the rest of the round. The thing to keep in mind with movement is that different tiles affect movement in different ways, so luckily reference cards are included in the game. Once a ship discovers a new island, the player receives one coin and a Quest card in addition to flipping over the question mark Island Feature Tokens. These tokens show specific resources, which Quest cards require to be completed, at specific locations on the board.
Players can spend an action point to Gather resources from an island. Players are able to fill up their ships’ holds with as much of the resource as they wish, and it can be replaced with other resources on future turns.
Map Clues are cards that can be worked on during play, similar to Quest cards, and usually require an action point to be spent. These are special circumstances, and the action points are not available to be spent on every turn. Similar special circumstances include visits to Outposts, Trading Posts, and Starting Spaces. These spaces allow players to buy and sell items, and upgrade and repair ships.
The last option for action point spending is by attacking. A player may Attack another player when they share the same space on the board. The attacking player spends an action point to fire their cannons equipped on their ship. The ammo is tracked and represented by ammo dice. Once rolled, the attacker scores hull damage for every four pips rolled. If the ship takes as many or more hull damage than they have HP hearts, their ship sinks. Fortunately, this does not eliminate the player, but they lose many resources and coins, and will need to respawn at their starting location.
The player who earns 15 or 20 prosperity (depending on game mode) from attacking players, completing Quest and Map Clue cards, and possibly some other secret methods, will win Quests & Cannons and leads their race to eternal glory!
Components. Again, this is a prototype copy of the game, but I’ll tell you what, if the finished project comes with even slightly better components, it will be a monumental accomplishment. This is one of the highest-quality home-made prototypes I have ever received. I know most art and many items are final, but everything is on the table for upgrades, with a successful Kickstarter campaign. The colors are great, the art is fantastical and amazing, and it looks phenomenal on the table. I really enjoy the different characters with their unique special powers, and the double-layer ship player mats. Everything has its place and is organized beautifully. I am very excited to see the final product that Short Hop Games achieves!
This kind of game is really right up my alley: head-to-head combat (without player elimination), exploration, and pick-up-and-deliver. The only thing this is missing to be the perfect Travis game is a deck building element, but that certainly wouldn’t fit here. Quests & Cannons is chocked full of mechanics that, I believe, work really well together to provide a great game experience without adding a ton of complexity. The hexploration is strong, and the pick-up-and-deliver mechanic is tasty. All the mechanics, components, and artwork synergize so well that I am surprised this is a title from first-time designers and publisher.
What I like most is that though the rules are plentiful, once you get them down you have a wonderfully fun versatile game that can be played with many different group permutations and modes. The variety in setup options are endless, and the rulebook offers nine or ten different setups. The game also comes with lots of extra map bits, so any player could dream up several unique setup options at any time. The Quests are great, and the Loot cards (though I didn’t mention them in the overview) offer lots of ways to improve players’ strategies. With the abundance of upgrades available and unique special powers, this one is a big winner for me.
If you are in the market for something a little different, with a great theme and interesting combination of mechanics, then Quests & Cannons is certainly worth a look. I am very excited to follow the progress and the campaign for this one. I think backers will be receiving an incredible game with excellent components and tons of replayability. Now to challenge my wife so she can mop the poop deck with me.
Quests & Cannons is a giant melting pot of mechanics rolled up into a cute little package with an interesting modular board with multiple setup options. In it, players take control of one of the aforementioned animal races and board their ships to claim islands and exploit their resources. The first player to amass 15 or 20 prosperity (VP) by the end of the game will reign victorious!
DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and I do not know for sure if the final components will be any different from these shown. Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game, as there are just too many. You are invited to download the rulebook, back the game through the Kickstarter campaign, or through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T
There are so many steps to setup, and about a thousand bits and pieces, so I will save both your eyes and my fingers explaining. However, once setup, it should look somewhat similar to the photo below. Each player receives their own upgradeable ship board to track resources, action points, and other game-necessary components, along with a specific character and matching boat token.
On a turn, players will have three action points they may spend in any order on the following actions: Movement, Gather, Attack. Movement is one nautical hex in any direction per action point used, unless a player uses one of their sails. Sails add one hex to a movement and is spent for the rest of the round. The thing to keep in mind with movement is that different tiles affect movement in different ways, so luckily reference cards are included in the game. Once a ship discovers a new island, the player receives one coin and a Quest card in addition to flipping over the question mark Island Feature Tokens. These tokens show specific resources, which Quest cards require to be completed, at specific locations on the board.
Players can spend an action point to Gather resources from an island. Players are able to fill up their ships’ holds with as much of the resource as they wish, and it can be replaced with other resources on future turns.
Map Clues are cards that can be worked on during play, similar to Quest cards, and usually require an action point to be spent. These are special circumstances, and the action points are not available to be spent on every turn. Similar special circumstances include visits to Outposts, Trading Posts, and Starting Spaces. These spaces allow players to buy and sell items, and upgrade and repair ships.
The last option for action point spending is by attacking. A player may Attack another player when they share the same space on the board. The attacking player spends an action point to fire their cannons equipped on their ship. The ammo is tracked and represented by ammo dice. Once rolled, the attacker scores hull damage for every four pips rolled. If the ship takes as many or more hull damage than they have HP hearts, their ship sinks. Fortunately, this does not eliminate the player, but they lose many resources and coins, and will need to respawn at their starting location.
The player who earns 15 or 20 prosperity (depending on game mode) from attacking players, completing Quest and Map Clue cards, and possibly some other secret methods, will win Quests & Cannons and leads their race to eternal glory!
Components. Again, this is a prototype copy of the game, but I’ll tell you what, if the finished project comes with even slightly better components, it will be a monumental accomplishment. This is one of the highest-quality home-made prototypes I have ever received. I know most art and many items are final, but everything is on the table for upgrades, with a successful Kickstarter campaign. The colors are great, the art is fantastical and amazing, and it looks phenomenal on the table. I really enjoy the different characters with their unique special powers, and the double-layer ship player mats. Everything has its place and is organized beautifully. I am very excited to see the final product that Short Hop Games achieves!
This kind of game is really right up my alley: head-to-head combat (without player elimination), exploration, and pick-up-and-deliver. The only thing this is missing to be the perfect Travis game is a deck building element, but that certainly wouldn’t fit here. Quests & Cannons is chocked full of mechanics that, I believe, work really well together to provide a great game experience without adding a ton of complexity. The hexploration is strong, and the pick-up-and-deliver mechanic is tasty. All the mechanics, components, and artwork synergize so well that I am surprised this is a title from first-time designers and publisher.
What I like most is that though the rules are plentiful, once you get them down you have a wonderfully fun versatile game that can be played with many different group permutations and modes. The variety in setup options are endless, and the rulebook offers nine or ten different setups. The game also comes with lots of extra map bits, so any player could dream up several unique setup options at any time. The Quests are great, and the Loot cards (though I didn’t mention them in the overview) offer lots of ways to improve players’ strategies. With the abundance of upgrades available and unique special powers, this one is a big winner for me.
If you are in the market for something a little different, with a great theme and interesting combination of mechanics, then Quests & Cannons is certainly worth a look. I am very excited to follow the progress and the campaign for this one. I think backers will be receiving an incredible game with excellent components and tons of replayability. Now to challenge my wife so she can mop the poop deck with me.
Purple Phoenix Games (2266 KP) rated Magical Friends and How to Summon Them in Tabletop Games
Sep 29, 2021
If there is one game theme that will never get old for me, it’s fantasy. Something about a world of magic and magical creatures is fascinating to me, and I will never turn down the chance to play any sort of fantasy-themed game. So when I came across Magical Friends and How to Summon Them, I was immediately hooked. Does the gameplay live up to my expectations of what a great fantasy game should be, or does it miss the magical mark?
Disclaimer: We were provided with a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this preview. The components pictured are not finalized, and could change after a successful Kickstarter campaign. I do not intend to rehash the entire rulebook, but rather provide a general overview of the rules and gameplay. For more information, head to the Magical Friends website. -L
Magical Friends and How to Summon Them (referred to as just Magical Friends from hereon out) is a strategic game of card drafting and variable turn order in which players take on the roles of mages attempting to summon the most magical creatures to the local tavern in order to win the Midsummer festival competition. Played over 8 rounds, players will take turns summoning creatures, moving them towards the tavern, using special creature abilities, and occasionally fighting off your opponents’ creatures. The player who gets the most creatures to the tavern by the end of the 8th round is the winner! To setup for the game, lay out the main board and summoning board in the center of the table. Take the 4 double-sided map tiles, randomly choose a side, and place them in their corresponding places on the main board. Shuffle the Summoning cards and reveal a number of cards, determined by player count, to create a market row and preview row. Each player receives a player mat, heart tokens, and Artifact Cards in their chosen color. Place the round marker on Round 1 of the main board, select a player to get the starting player token, and the game is ready to begin!
To start a round, first you will need to determine turn order. Each player has an identical deck of 11 Artifact Cards, numbered 1-11. The player who offers the most powerful (highest number) Artifact gets to act first in the round. The player with the starting player token chooses their card first, and places it face-up on their player mat. The next player, in clockwise order, will do the same. Here’s the catch though – once a number has been played, it cannot be played by anyone else for this round! So say I put choose my value 8 card – no other player may choose that card for this round. Once all players have chosen their Artifacts, determine the turn order for the round. The player with the highest valued Artifact goes first, then the next highest, and so on.
Once the turn order has been determined, it is time for players to take their turns! On your turn, the first thing you will do is to select a Summoning card from the Summoning board and take it into their tableau. The selected card tells you which friend (creature) you have summoned, and tells you how many moves/what types of movement you may take this round. After choosing your Summoning card, you will take any/all of the following actions: Summon a friend (bring its standee into play), use basic movement (as determined by your new friend), use bonus movement (from other cards), or use the abilities of any friends in your tableau. You may perform as many of these actions as you want and are able to perform. It is important to note that each friend may only use one basic movement and one bonus movement per round. So you can’t just move a single friend with every movement available in one turn.
Once you are finished performing actions, you will end your turn. Refresh the Summoning board by shifting cards down and refilling any empty creature slots. Play then moves to the player with the next highest valued Artifact card. When all players have taken their turn, the round ends. Move the Round marker up one spot, and pass the starting player token to the next clockwise player. A new round will then start with the turn order determination, beginning with the new starting player. After 8 rounds of play, the winner is crowned. Players score points for the number of their friends who reached the tavern, and the player with the highest score wins!
I’ll come right out and say that I really have enjoyed Magical Friends. There are lots of elements that I like and that work well together to create a fun, strategic, and engaging game. First, turn order determination. I love that the turn order isn’t set for the entire game, because that could really be a detriment to whomever would be last every round. Being able to ‘bid’ for turn order, in a sense, allows players to be proactive (or conversely, reactive) with their strategy. And after you’ve used an Artifact card in a round, it is discarded and cannot be used for the rest of the game. So you need to decide when it’s worth it to play your high value cards to hopefully act first, or if you’re willing to risk playing a mid-value card that might be out-bid by an opponent.
The other awesome strategic element are the friends in the game. Each friend is a different creature with different movement options and special abilities during gameplay. An important thing to note is that although every friend has a printed movement value on its card, you may only ever use that value on the round in which you summon that friend. So a Griffin, for example, lets you move 3 friends 2 spaces, which you may do when you first summon the Griffin. But in future rounds, the Griffin will only move based on the movements provided by the most newly acquired friend. Maybe you don’t necessarily want to summon a Mermaid, but the movement she offers is exactly what you need to get some friends to the tavern for scoring. It’s all a neat mix of strategy that you are changing with every turn. Along with the movements, each friend has a special ability that can be used on your turns. Some abilities allow you to move extra spaces, move opponents, or even slay creatures. When you slay a creature, you collect its heart token for endgame scoring, and the player who controlled that creature gets a Pity Power card (which provide bonus movement). You need to decide when to move which friends, and in what order to trigger your abilities. You must always be paying attention to the board layout and your opponents’ turns as they will help you determine your strategy for future turns.
Components. As I mentioned earlier, this is a prototype version of the game, but with that said, the components are pretty nice! The cards are sturdy, the text is clear, and the artwork is fun to look at. The main game board and summoning boards are colorful, and the creature standees are nicely sized for the board. I do have to say that I really like the heart tokens used to identify to whom each creature belongs on the board. The hearts slide over top of the standee and create a base of sorts to color-code every creature on the board. Just a neat little use of components that make the gameplay smooth. And how about the insert? It’s awesome! The standees are all stored, assembled, in a slotted inlay that allows for quick selection of creatures. I hope that’s something that makes it to final production because it really helps streamline the gameplay. Some of the wording in the rulebook could use some clarification, but I know that it is still a work in progress and continues to undergo edits. The only negative I would have to say is that 2 of the player colors are black and gray – and they are sometimes difficult to differentiate between. But changing one color should be an easy fix!
All in all, I was pleasantly surprised by Magical Friends. At first glance, I thought it would be a pretty simple ‘roll-and-move’ type game, but it proved to be much more strategic and engaging than I initially thought. The variable turn order, the movement rules/restrictions, and the unique friend abilities all work together to create a cohesive, thematic, and strategic game. I very much am looking forward to following the progress of Magical Friends and How to Summon Them on Kickstarter, and I encourage you to check it out as well!
Disclaimer: We were provided with a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this preview. The components pictured are not finalized, and could change after a successful Kickstarter campaign. I do not intend to rehash the entire rulebook, but rather provide a general overview of the rules and gameplay. For more information, head to the Magical Friends website. -L
Magical Friends and How to Summon Them (referred to as just Magical Friends from hereon out) is a strategic game of card drafting and variable turn order in which players take on the roles of mages attempting to summon the most magical creatures to the local tavern in order to win the Midsummer festival competition. Played over 8 rounds, players will take turns summoning creatures, moving them towards the tavern, using special creature abilities, and occasionally fighting off your opponents’ creatures. The player who gets the most creatures to the tavern by the end of the 8th round is the winner! To setup for the game, lay out the main board and summoning board in the center of the table. Take the 4 double-sided map tiles, randomly choose a side, and place them in their corresponding places on the main board. Shuffle the Summoning cards and reveal a number of cards, determined by player count, to create a market row and preview row. Each player receives a player mat, heart tokens, and Artifact Cards in their chosen color. Place the round marker on Round 1 of the main board, select a player to get the starting player token, and the game is ready to begin!
To start a round, first you will need to determine turn order. Each player has an identical deck of 11 Artifact Cards, numbered 1-11. The player who offers the most powerful (highest number) Artifact gets to act first in the round. The player with the starting player token chooses their card first, and places it face-up on their player mat. The next player, in clockwise order, will do the same. Here’s the catch though – once a number has been played, it cannot be played by anyone else for this round! So say I put choose my value 8 card – no other player may choose that card for this round. Once all players have chosen their Artifacts, determine the turn order for the round. The player with the highest valued Artifact goes first, then the next highest, and so on.
Once the turn order has been determined, it is time for players to take their turns! On your turn, the first thing you will do is to select a Summoning card from the Summoning board and take it into their tableau. The selected card tells you which friend (creature) you have summoned, and tells you how many moves/what types of movement you may take this round. After choosing your Summoning card, you will take any/all of the following actions: Summon a friend (bring its standee into play), use basic movement (as determined by your new friend), use bonus movement (from other cards), or use the abilities of any friends in your tableau. You may perform as many of these actions as you want and are able to perform. It is important to note that each friend may only use one basic movement and one bonus movement per round. So you can’t just move a single friend with every movement available in one turn.
Once you are finished performing actions, you will end your turn. Refresh the Summoning board by shifting cards down and refilling any empty creature slots. Play then moves to the player with the next highest valued Artifact card. When all players have taken their turn, the round ends. Move the Round marker up one spot, and pass the starting player token to the next clockwise player. A new round will then start with the turn order determination, beginning with the new starting player. After 8 rounds of play, the winner is crowned. Players score points for the number of their friends who reached the tavern, and the player with the highest score wins!
I’ll come right out and say that I really have enjoyed Magical Friends. There are lots of elements that I like and that work well together to create a fun, strategic, and engaging game. First, turn order determination. I love that the turn order isn’t set for the entire game, because that could really be a detriment to whomever would be last every round. Being able to ‘bid’ for turn order, in a sense, allows players to be proactive (or conversely, reactive) with their strategy. And after you’ve used an Artifact card in a round, it is discarded and cannot be used for the rest of the game. So you need to decide when it’s worth it to play your high value cards to hopefully act first, or if you’re willing to risk playing a mid-value card that might be out-bid by an opponent.
The other awesome strategic element are the friends in the game. Each friend is a different creature with different movement options and special abilities during gameplay. An important thing to note is that although every friend has a printed movement value on its card, you may only ever use that value on the round in which you summon that friend. So a Griffin, for example, lets you move 3 friends 2 spaces, which you may do when you first summon the Griffin. But in future rounds, the Griffin will only move based on the movements provided by the most newly acquired friend. Maybe you don’t necessarily want to summon a Mermaid, but the movement she offers is exactly what you need to get some friends to the tavern for scoring. It’s all a neat mix of strategy that you are changing with every turn. Along with the movements, each friend has a special ability that can be used on your turns. Some abilities allow you to move extra spaces, move opponents, or even slay creatures. When you slay a creature, you collect its heart token for endgame scoring, and the player who controlled that creature gets a Pity Power card (which provide bonus movement). You need to decide when to move which friends, and in what order to trigger your abilities. You must always be paying attention to the board layout and your opponents’ turns as they will help you determine your strategy for future turns.
Components. As I mentioned earlier, this is a prototype version of the game, but with that said, the components are pretty nice! The cards are sturdy, the text is clear, and the artwork is fun to look at. The main game board and summoning boards are colorful, and the creature standees are nicely sized for the board. I do have to say that I really like the heart tokens used to identify to whom each creature belongs on the board. The hearts slide over top of the standee and create a base of sorts to color-code every creature on the board. Just a neat little use of components that make the gameplay smooth. And how about the insert? It’s awesome! The standees are all stored, assembled, in a slotted inlay that allows for quick selection of creatures. I hope that’s something that makes it to final production because it really helps streamline the gameplay. Some of the wording in the rulebook could use some clarification, but I know that it is still a work in progress and continues to undergo edits. The only negative I would have to say is that 2 of the player colors are black and gray – and they are sometimes difficult to differentiate between. But changing one color should be an easy fix!
All in all, I was pleasantly surprised by Magical Friends. At first glance, I thought it would be a pretty simple ‘roll-and-move’ type game, but it proved to be much more strategic and engaging than I initially thought. The variable turn order, the movement rules/restrictions, and the unique friend abilities all work together to create a cohesive, thematic, and strategic game. I very much am looking forward to following the progress of Magical Friends and How to Summon Them on Kickstarter, and I encourage you to check it out as well!
Bob Mann (459 KP) rated Slaughterhouse Rulez (2018) in Movies
Sep 28, 2021
Form-Prefect of the Dead.
The Plot
Meredith Houseman (Simon Pegg) is housemaster of Sparta house in Slaughterhouse school: an ancient public school establishment steering England’s future greats to greatness (which probably explains a lot about the current Brexit mess!). Houseman is not in a happy place, given that his girlfriend is now in deepest darkest African doing “good works” with handsome French doctors, and particularly that she is played by Margot Robbie: I would be also be sad… #punching!
New school starter Don Wallace (Finn Cole) is equally unhappy as he is a northern teen dragooned into attending the school by his well-meaning Mum (Jo Hartley). His strange room-mate Willoughby (Asa Butterfield) seems to be a chronic depressive; he is being picked on by the prefect-bully Clegg (Tom Rhys Harries); and his bed was previously occupied by a Viscount, since deceased under unpleasant circumstances that no-one wants to talk about. At least he has the distraction of the upper-sixth school goddess Clemsie Lawrence (Hermione Corfield) to take his mind off his woes.
All this washes over “The Bat” – the school’s headmaster (Michael Sheen) – since he is engrossed in some shady deal with an evil corporation doing fracking in the school grounds. The fracking though seems to be doing more than just causing a few minor earth tremors, as ancient forces are unleashed.
The Review
The movie is positioned as a “comedy/horror”, along the lines of “Shaun of the Dead”. The film also has Frost and Pegg as executive producers and they also have starring roles in the film. But there the similarities really end: this is a “Cornetto film” without a cone of solid chocolate lurking at the bottom to enjoy.
The script (by director Crispian Mills and first-time screenwriter Henry Fitzherbert) is nowhere near as sharp as the Frost/Pegg scripts for their famous collaborations. The story overall makes precious little sense: it’s a hodge-podge of elements from many Harry Potter films (especially “The Chamber of Secrets”), Lindsay Anderson’s “If…”; and Roy Boulting’s “The Guinea Pig”; with also a sprinkling of the anarchic essence of Michael Palin’s classic “Tomkinson’s Schooldays”. The whole thing never manages to gel into a cohesive whole.
After the second reel, the film completely loses sight of the plot: there’s a whole lot of running, screaming and dying going on but there’s little logic behind any of it that I could fathom. What didn’t help my comprehension of what was going on were some ‘Cornetto-esque’ sequences of manic editing. Images were thrown onto the screen so subliminally that any clever nuance was lost. I’m sure at one point there was a droll (if gross) segue at a “Roman orgy” of a girl receiving oral sex before being ‘eaten out’ in an entirely different way. But you would need a Blu-ray and a frame-by-frame pause function to get the joke.
That’s not to say that I didn’t laugh a few times along the way. There are some sight gags – for example, Wooten (Kit Connor) as the lad at the bottom of the bullying pecking order, chained to a U-bend – that made me laugh, and some running jokes – for example, Frost as the head of the anti-fracking camp offering the kids drugs at every encounter – that mildly amuse. But once again here’s a British comedy that, like the atrocious “The Brits are Coming“, thinks that “funny” largely revolves around swearing a lot – how useful that “frack” sounds so similar to another word – with added bodily dismemberment.
The turns
Pegg and Frost ham it up with their usual comedy schtick well enough, and it was quite fun to see Sheen try a comedy role for a change as the conniving and supercilious headmaster. Elsewhere all the young cast put their hearts into it, but it’s again Asa Butterfield that your eyes gravitate to, due to his striking features. I last saw Asa in the excellent if harrowing WW1 drama “Journey’s End“, and he here proves again that he is a One Mann’s Movies ‘name to watch for the future’.
Final thoughts
There’s a lot to irritate in this film. From the “z” in the title to… well… about 80% of the film. There is no nuance or subtlety to either the writing or the direction. I think that’s a great shame. The film has a good premise hidden in there. An adult comedy set around the ridiculous rules and rites of public schools (away from the light nonsense of “St Trinians”) is overdue. And the whole subject of fracking, and the conflicts surrounding the controversial techniques, hasn’t yet – to my knowledge – been explored in a fictional movie. The film does have a few very funny moments. But as a whole I left the cinema with that “wasted two hours” feeling. Not recommended.
Meredith Houseman (Simon Pegg) is housemaster of Sparta house in Slaughterhouse school: an ancient public school establishment steering England’s future greats to greatness (which probably explains a lot about the current Brexit mess!). Houseman is not in a happy place, given that his girlfriend is now in deepest darkest African doing “good works” with handsome French doctors, and particularly that she is played by Margot Robbie: I would be also be sad… #punching!
New school starter Don Wallace (Finn Cole) is equally unhappy as he is a northern teen dragooned into attending the school by his well-meaning Mum (Jo Hartley). His strange room-mate Willoughby (Asa Butterfield) seems to be a chronic depressive; he is being picked on by the prefect-bully Clegg (Tom Rhys Harries); and his bed was previously occupied by a Viscount, since deceased under unpleasant circumstances that no-one wants to talk about. At least he has the distraction of the upper-sixth school goddess Clemsie Lawrence (Hermione Corfield) to take his mind off his woes.
All this washes over “The Bat” – the school’s headmaster (Michael Sheen) – since he is engrossed in some shady deal with an evil corporation doing fracking in the school grounds. The fracking though seems to be doing more than just causing a few minor earth tremors, as ancient forces are unleashed.
The Review
The movie is positioned as a “comedy/horror”, along the lines of “Shaun of the Dead”. The film also has Frost and Pegg as executive producers and they also have starring roles in the film. But there the similarities really end: this is a “Cornetto film” without a cone of solid chocolate lurking at the bottom to enjoy.
The script (by director Crispian Mills and first-time screenwriter Henry Fitzherbert) is nowhere near as sharp as the Frost/Pegg scripts for their famous collaborations. The story overall makes precious little sense: it’s a hodge-podge of elements from many Harry Potter films (especially “The Chamber of Secrets”), Lindsay Anderson’s “If…”; and Roy Boulting’s “The Guinea Pig”; with also a sprinkling of the anarchic essence of Michael Palin’s classic “Tomkinson’s Schooldays”. The whole thing never manages to gel into a cohesive whole.
After the second reel, the film completely loses sight of the plot: there’s a whole lot of running, screaming and dying going on but there’s little logic behind any of it that I could fathom. What didn’t help my comprehension of what was going on were some ‘Cornetto-esque’ sequences of manic editing. Images were thrown onto the screen so subliminally that any clever nuance was lost. I’m sure at one point there was a droll (if gross) segue at a “Roman orgy” of a girl receiving oral sex before being ‘eaten out’ in an entirely different way. But you would need a Blu-ray and a frame-by-frame pause function to get the joke.
That’s not to say that I didn’t laugh a few times along the way. There are some sight gags – for example, Wooten (Kit Connor) as the lad at the bottom of the bullying pecking order, chained to a U-bend – that made me laugh, and some running jokes – for example, Frost as the head of the anti-fracking camp offering the kids drugs at every encounter – that mildly amuse. But once again here’s a British comedy that, like the atrocious “The Brits are Coming“, thinks that “funny” largely revolves around swearing a lot – how useful that “frack” sounds so similar to another word – with added bodily dismemberment.
The turns
Pegg and Frost ham it up with their usual comedy schtick well enough, and it was quite fun to see Sheen try a comedy role for a change as the conniving and supercilious headmaster. Elsewhere all the young cast put their hearts into it, but it’s again Asa Butterfield that your eyes gravitate to, due to his striking features. I last saw Asa in the excellent if harrowing WW1 drama “Journey’s End“, and he here proves again that he is a One Mann’s Movies ‘name to watch for the future’.
Final thoughts
There’s a lot to irritate in this film. From the “z” in the title to… well… about 80% of the film. There is no nuance or subtlety to either the writing or the direction. I think that’s a great shame. The film has a good premise hidden in there. An adult comedy set around the ridiculous rules and rites of public schools (away from the light nonsense of “St Trinians”) is overdue. And the whole subject of fracking, and the conflicts surrounding the controversial techniques, hasn’t yet – to my knowledge – been explored in a fictional movie. The film does have a few very funny moments. But as a whole I left the cinema with that “wasted two hours” feeling. Not recommended.