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Aquaman (2018)
Aquaman (2018)
2018 | Action, Sci-Fi
There is a group of comic book fans that like this film, and defend its virtues. I could never be true friends with any of those people. One look at James Wan’s directing CV and I should have known it wouldn’t be for me. Several of the most generic “horror” movies of the last few decades, plus a pop at the diabolical Fast & Furious franchise. Oh, dear god, no! I went in with an open mind, but 30 minutes of frantic chaos (and the editing of a six year old left to punch the computer with a toy truck) later and I was completely exasperated by it all. It was all I could do to force myself to finish it, and it took three sessions to do so. The wonderful Willem Dafoe and the often glorious Nicole Kidman try hard, but look embarrassed to be involved in the main. Whereas Patrick Wilson comes across as… just weird! Jason Mamoa should have a future in either films starring The Rock or films that want to be films starring The Rock. After this travesty of cinema and wasted money it’ll take a lot to make me remotely interested. Avoid at all costs.
  
Young Adult (2011)
Young Adult (2011)
2011 | Comedy, Drama
8
7.6 (5 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Charlize Theron (2 more)
Patton Oswalt
Elizabeth Reaser
Patrick Wilson (0 more)
Adulting Not Suited For Everyone
First off, in order to enjoy this deliciously vapid slice of life film I highly recommend suspending your moral compass to get a truly enjoyable viewing. Charlize Theron is absolutely PERFECT as ghost writer Mavis Gary, who for the most part, hasn't matured beyond her glory days as a popular high school cheerleader and displays questionable morality traits as the film progresses. She's tall, blonde, and beautiful and as such was destined to go on to do amazing things in life...until life got in the way. Enjoying moderate success as a ghost writer of a once popular young adult series, Mavis's only real source of income is dwindling, as the series is coming to an end as she struggles to write a satisfactory ending which mirrors what's happening in her own personal life. As luck would have it, an old high school flame of Mavis's sends her an e-vite to a celebration for the birth of his first child and the events that unfold is anything short of cringe worthy, rage, and ultimately dissapointment. I highly recommend this quant little film that I feel doesn't get nearly as much attention and praise as it deserves, it makes for one heck of a Friday night in!
  
Bone Tomahawk (2015)
Bone Tomahawk (2015)
2015 | Action, Horror, Western
The Citizen Kane of horror westerns
First of all, any time a movie combines two of my favorite things, in this case, a western and Kurt Russell, you have a recipe for success.

Certainly not for the squeamish or faint of heart, the horribly awesome brutality in this film rivals any I have seen in my life and that's saying a lot.


The plot is your basic four men set out to find and rescue several townspeople who have been kidnapped by horrible cave-dwelling "Indians" who no one seems to know anything about. Along the way, they have to face the elements of the weather, their own injuries and the eminent threat of encountering the ferocious beats that they are always on edge.


Patrick Wilson, Richard Jenkins and Matthew Fox are all also wonderful as the men who set off with Russell on their rescue quest.


For what the movie sets out to do, it succeeds wholeheartedly. Thoroughly engaging throughout, I was glued to my seat the entire time and the 135 minute runtime goes by in a flash.


In reading about it afterwards, it is unbelievable to me the movie was shot in only 21 days and for only $1.8 million.


Who says creativity is dead in Hollywood? Just takes great writing. I'd watch this before Iron Man 12 anytime.


  
Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013)
Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013)
2013 | Horror, Mystery
7
6.8 (20 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Closes the loose ends from the first film (0 more)
Opens more at the end (exasperated emoji) (0 more)
This follow on film stays with the family after the events of the first film left the family reunited but with something decidedly not right about Josh, the father (played by The Conjuring's Patrick Wilson, who I really can't take to).
Everything seems to get back to normal for a short time with the family reunited and moving on from the trauma they've been through. But this doesn't last long and soon strange things start happening again, this time focused around the baby.
For me, this film fell down a little as many horror sequels do, trying to build on tiny parts of the original story rather than carrying on from it. I found the parts where the reality and past of the presence that haunted Josh in his childhood really engaging and exciting and creepy, but felt this should have been explored so much more.
Rose Byrne is good again, somehow keeping the family together through all the unpleasantness.
One thing that did spoil this for me was when, after a particularly creepy scene in which a ghost child's foot steps were heard running through the house, my 3 year old son decided to get up and run through to my bedroom so I suddenly heard footsteps eerily similar to those on the film directly above my head.
A decent follow on with some interesting exploration of small aspects of the first film, but largely more of the same.
  
The A-Team (2010)
The A-Team (2010)
2010 | Action
Goofy fun!
Oh, good lord, this movie is just ridiculously fun. Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, Sharlto Copley, and Quinton Jackson are pretty much the perfect cast for this movie. They were together so well, and watching them go in the midst of absolute chaos just had me laughing so hard I had tears in my eyes. The A-Team movie takes all the best parts of the original show (which I very vaguely remember), and ramps it up a notch with outrageous stunts and great special effects.

Quinton Jackson is a bit more baby-faced than the original Mr. T, but when he’s screaming in the helicopter and other places at Sharlto/Murdock? It’s enough to put an ear-to-ear smile on your face. He was probably my favorite person in the film. Liam Neeson – well, he plays a slightly more fun version of his normal characters, so there’s not much to say about him. Bradley Cooper was a treat – mainly when he was shirtless – playing Face. He’s not particularly memorable – except, again, when shirtless – but still did a great job. Sharlto? Sharlto was pure crazy in the best possible way.

In terms of the others, seeing a younger Patrick Wilson was a treat. His tantrum scene was great. Jessica Biel is, erm, a good straight shooter? Really, she was pretty unmemorable.

The action combined with the humor was perfect. I mean, I like Mission Impossible as much as the next adrelaline-driven female, but it takes itself too seriously. You need the giggles to be the icing on the cake. Hm, and a half-naked Bradley Cooper to be the cherry on top.
  
Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013)
Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013)
2013 | Horror, Mystery
7
6.8 (20 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Some good tension ramping (1 more)
Jump Scares are on point
The 'Baddies' in this lack the pure sinister power of the demon from the first. (1 more)
Its a little 'straightforward haunted house movie' for my tastes
Decent Tension, but disappointingly predictable
Contains spoilers, click to show
Straight off the bat, if you liked the first Insidious, you will likely like the second.

Following straight on from the end of the first film, we are straight back with Wan's favourite boy Patrick Wilson and family, and the plot is a solid continuation of the themes explored in the first movie.

The camerawork in this movie, the framing of some of the shots etc is phenomenal and genuinely half of the tension of this film is generated by clever angles, and the lurching movement of the camera itself.

But where Insidious always began to struggle for me was in the mythos and the 'spirit realm' where it went a bit 'poltergeist' and took me out of the tension build in both films, though some of the ideas were interesting.

This film's antagonists never reach the same level of intimidation and fear as represented by the brilliant 'Darth Maul' Demon of the initial flick, but there are some interesting dynamics introduced using a serial killer and his relationship with his mother.

The biggest disappointment is probably just that Insidious 2 doesn't really ever expand on the first, leaving us with a nicely wrapped up story, but without really expanding our understanding or excitement for what a 3rd installment could offer.

That being said, it does enough right to make it an enjoyable watch, and the class of Wan and Whannell is evident throughout.

A polished, decent scare fest with plenty of strengths, but lacking in a truly memorable antagonist.
  
The Conjuring 2 (2016)
The Conjuring 2 (2016)
2016 | Horror
James Wan's style is all over the film (1 more)
Well made high budget horror
The accents and some of the acting are hard work, particularly in the beginning (0 more)
You get exactly what you ask for
First off, if you liked the first conjuring, you will like the second one.

James Wan's classy approach to horror, complete with clever camera movements, tension building sustained shots and a patient approach to scares are still consistent throughout the movie, and there is simply no doubt that this is one of his movies.

The plot continues to follow the controversial Warren's investigations into paranormal events, with the excellent Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga perfectly capturing the cooky and over the top personalities of the Warrens, and adding a bit of light-heartedness to what is otherwise a fairly grim and unrelenting plot-line.

This time the story is set in England and revolves around the story of the Enfield Haunting, a very famous "real story" about a family experiencing a poltergeist in the 70's.

Obviously Wan and Co take this story and ramp it up to 11, introducing new characters and making it much more of a spectacle, and it is largely an enjoyable rollercoaster, with just enough jump scares to keep you on the edge of your seat, but without getting tiring.

Horror Reddits and Forums constantly argue about whether the conjuring 1 or 2 is the stronger film, and I choose not to enter that particular argument, other than to say that one is probably as good as the other, similar in tone and presentation as they are.

Some will argue that these films are not particularly original. and they may have a point.

Still there is no doubt that James Wan delivers on high quality, well made horror, and that is something for us all to enjoy.
  
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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Annabelle Comes Home (2019) in Movies

Oct 26, 2020 (Updated Oct 26, 2020)  
Annabelle Comes Home (2019)
Annabelle Comes Home (2019)
2019 | Horror, Mystery, Thriller
Incompetent, one of the worst horror movies I've ever seen. No film with a 70s soundtrack this cool should suck this hard, just as a bylaw from now on. Gives you false hope by starting off with Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga's charming Warren couple (after rehashing that first 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘊𝘰𝘯𝘫𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 scene for the third goddamned time in three different movies) then violating your trust by immediately veering into pure shit. Not even remotely scary, just really loud and irritating - somehow even less frightening than 𝘈𝘯𝘯𝘢𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘦: 𝘊𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 and that useless spinoff wasn't scary either. The same tropes with increasingly less charm, wit, originality, and purpose with each subsequent entry - this one having the added facet of looking like total ass now too! You'd think a beloved multi-million dollar franchise would be able to produce a film that doesn't look like a cheap Halloween section at a Party City with only like one and a half cool shots lmfao. At first you may think that maybe its lack of polish is supposed to add into a nostalgic, old-school Hollywood horror vibe but no - they just didn't care. For a now defaced series so adamant on overstuffing itself with intertwining lore (like so many films feel the need to nowadays during this unholy "just wait for the good stuff... it's building for now..." franchise kick) to the point of losing all sense of singularity they really put nothing into this writing to justify any of that. They really just turned this into some disgraceful, borderline unwatchable, generic drek that'd feel right at home in 2011/2012's rotten horror catalogue. A sequel to a prequel of a prequel to a main entry which has its own sequel that has *its* own spinoff. The pits.
  
Moonfall (2022)
Moonfall (2022)
2022 | Action, Adventure, Fantasy
The disaster effects. (0 more)
Terribly written. (2 more)
Overacted.
Halle Berry.
Moonfall Review: It’s Raining Moon
Moonfall is a $146 million sci-fi disaster film directed by Roland Emmerich (Independence Day, Godzilla) and written by Emmerich, Harald Kloser (2012, 10000 BC), and Spenser Cohen (Extinction, The Expendables 4).

On January 12, 2011, during what is referred to as routine outer space maintenance (it’s a thing), an unidentified technological swarm caused significant damage to the astronaut’s shuttle; killing one of them and incapacitating the surviving two crew members. Brian Harper (Patrick Wilson) maneuvers the shuttle back to earth with no power while his navigator Jocinda Fowl (Halle Berry) is unconscious. Brian takes the fall as he’s labeled incompetent despite previously being an acclaimed hero and he loses his job with NASA.

Ten years later, the moon suddenly begins changing course as a hole 26-kilometers deep is discovered in the center of it. People on earth have three weeks before the moon begins falling to earth in city-sized pieces. While NASA scrambles to discover a solution, an orbital megastructure aficionado and conspiracy blogger named K.C. Houseman (John Bradley) knew about the moon’s shift in course before NASA and may end up being the savior of mankind.

The opening scene of Moonfall lets its audience know that they’re in for an excruciating two hours. Patrick Wilson and Halle Berry argue over the lyrics to Toto’s “Africa” as Wilson musically screeches the 80s rock ballad to annoying results. The film does a few things right like earth’s gravity being a complete dumpster fire and the ocean literally being at foot of everyone’s door like Bo Burnham talked about in Inside. But then introduces the aspect of orbital megastructure in an attempt to not adhere to believable physics while lethargically committing to it.

Flooding, earthquakes, and birds falling to the ground due to gravity alterations are the culmination of the insanity in Moonfall. The moon coming closer to earth also apparently means humans can lift trees above their head and jump over gaps left by fallen bridges with little effort. There’s an awkward car chase between some redneck looters and the main characters of the film.

It’s awkward due to the fact that it’s really funky visual effects (literally everything taking place on the road and in the background) with green screen (the actors driving the cars), but it’s difficult to distinguish what’s what in a bad way. The CGI and special effects in the film are that peculiar blend of not necessarily being bad, but are just off-putting enough to look weird in some capacity. It’s a high speed chase involving a gravity wave, which is mostly just cars and debris floating in the air as the sky turns red. Coincidentally enough, the disaster effects are the best part of the film because they do what they’re supposed to do without overstaying their welcome.

The dialogue in the film is atrocious and Halle Berry is a filter for most of the bad lines. Some of her gems include, “I don’t work for you, I work for the American people and I don’t like keeping them in the dark,” “I am…(the longest pause ever between one word and another)…thinking about our son,” and something overwhelmingly corny about earth’s hourglass and our time running out. Donald Sutherland can barely stomach a brief cameo appearance shared with Berry’s character before excusing himself to the loaded gun he left back in his room (yes, this actually happens).

The evacuation route in Moonfall seems to involve fleeing to Colorado. What is in Colorado and why that’s important is never really explained other than because everyone else is there. Jocinda Fowl becomes the lead director of NASA during the film and her ex-husband (played by Eme Ikwuakor) works for the military. Ikwuakor does nothing but squint like French Stewart the entire time. NASA wants to survey the activity of what’s transpiring on the moon, fly inside of its new fancy made hole, and come up with a plan to save earth in the process. The military just wants to blow up the moon with nukes; screw the consequences, this is America!

With Moonfall, Roland Emmerich has essentially made an even dumber version of Michael Bay’s Armageddon. There’s not a lot to enjoy here apart from KC Houseman’s house cat being named Fuzz Aldrin. With its idiotic premise, hammy dialogue involving some of the most exaggerated emotional speeches ever, stiff acting, unfunny humor, and purposely distorted CGI, Moonfall features an overwhelming amount of frenetic nonsense and has no excuse to be as boring as it is.
  
Aquaman (2018)
Aquaman (2018)
2018 | Action, Sci-Fi
A little too cheesy
I really badly wanted to like this film, but for me it was a little too bad in places to really be anything other than just ‘ok’.

As stated by virtually everyone else who has reviewed it so far, the CGI is fantastic. For the most part, this film looks visually stunning. There are a few instances though where I thought some of the sets and costumes were a little too lurid and garish and looked a little bit ridiculous. But mostly it looked great. And I give a huge thumbs up to the fight scenes - I’m sick of watching shaky camera fights that give you motion sickness, so it was freshing to watch the brilliantly shot and choreographed scenes in this, the flowed very well. Jason Momoa is also fantastic, he plays Aquaman perfectly with just enough charm, brashness and charisma to make him funny and likeable. I even found myself liking Amber Heard, which is odd as I’ve never liked her in anything else. The rest of the cast though are hit and miss; the excellent Willem Defoe is underused, Patrick Wilson is misplaced and hamming it up far too much, and I can’t look at Nicole Kidman anymore without seeing all of the fakery and plastic in her face... and Black Manta? When he turned up in his fancy suit, he just looked like a goth version of Alpha from the Power Rangers. Very poor choice of bad guy there.

Where this film really falters though is the script and parts of the plot. Whilst this film is obviously meant to be silly, the script is horrendous and stilted in parts and the plot is beyond predictable. And I also thought the runtime is much too long. The cast, effects and director do their best, but it’s let down by the writing.

Also, did anyone else think the Karathen looked like a Kaiju? Didn’t clock she was voiced by Julie Andrews though until afterwards.
  
Show all 3 comments.
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Ross (3282 KP) Jan 9, 2019

Lol'ing at Black Manta being a goth Alpha.

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Sarah (7798 KP) Jan 9, 2019

@Erika she did didn’t she? I’m surprised she still gets any roles now as she can’t really move her face...