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Salty Dogs
Salty Dogs
2019 | Animals, Card Game, Pirates
Avast ye land lubbers!! Batten down the hatches! I am a scary pirate! Ok so maybe that last one isn’t necessarily historically accurate, but it’s fun. Sometimes you can enjoy something purely because it’s fun and you don’t have to analyze everything down to the mechanic or pixel. I am not even going to attempt that with this one, but I will explain the rules and our thoughts through several plays of Salty Dogs.

Salty Dogs is a small card game – it fits into a normal deck box – where each player is captaining their pirate ship and vying to become King of the Mountain! … or, rather, the High Seas! Players must protect their crew and be the last pirate ship standing to win the game!

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a review copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and I do not know if the final components will be similar or different, or if the Kickstarter campaign will alter or add anything through stretch goals. Similarly, you will see the play mat that was provided. You can download a play mat from the game’s website or order these from the publisher. -T

Setup is easy peasy scurvy squeezy. Remove from the deck all the pirate cards (they have a blue banner with a unique name at the bottom). Shuffle these, and deal each player five pirates. This will make up the crew for each player’s ship. No individual cards have certain abilities – they are all the same – so either place your crew randomly or choose who you would prefer to be Captain, First Mate, and then dump the others into the generic Pirate spaces. From there shuffle the remaining pirate cards into the deck, deal each player five cards and the battle is on!

On your turn, draw a card and play a card. Ok, on to final thoughts! Kidding, but game play is really that easy. There is no hand minimum or maximum limit, but it usually stays around five for the duration of the game. Cards drawn will be pirates, actions, attacks, illnesses, cures, or defense cards. You use pirate cards to refill any vacant crew slot on your ship. Vacancies happen when an opponent plays an attack or illness card on one of your crew. Your crew may only be attacked in a certain order with the first attackable card being furthest away from your Captain, and said Captain being targeted last. So your pirate is ill, eh? Simply play a cure card that affects the illness and heal your crew right up. Example – you have contracted Scurvy. Well, obviously the only cure for Scurvy is Piggy Peg Leg’s Gumbo. So throw the Gumbo card to cure your crew’s illness. That dastardly Captain Doodles McPoodle is firing their cannon attacks at you? Throw your Fog defense card to protect yourself – BOOM! There are several other illness and action combinations in the game I will allow you to discover for yourselves.

A note about attacking First Mates and Captains. First Mates are immune to Mutiny cards, and the Captain is immune to Mutiny AND Illness cards. This is a rule pair that can easily be forgotten, so try to keep that in mind the whole time as your crews are blown to smithereens.

Components. Per my disclaimer we were sent the deck of cards and four optional play mats. These components may change or improve over the course of the upcoming Kickstarter campaign, but I will comment on what we were sent. The cards are of good quality and the art upon them and throughout the game is quirky, but really really good. We really enjoyed seeing some tongue-in-cheek pop culture references in the pirate cards and in the accompanying art. The play mats feel like the top layer of a mouse pad – they are silky smooth and just as thin. I thought having thin play mats would be a negative, but then I packed up the game again and was thankful that they weren’t complete neoprene pads. So I’m in on those play mats. If you don’t splurge for the play mats, just line up your crew in front of you and it’s quite functional that way as well.

Salty Dogs. What did we think? Well, honestly, we really loved it. The art is whimsical and colorful. The cards are all super useful, and there’s something to be said about just obliterating your opponents’ ships and giving in to the piratey bloodlust. I was targeted early and was raring to come back as soon as I could in the next game. With so many pirate games, take that games, card games, and battle games on the market, I still think most gamers will enjoy Salty Dogs. It is not at all a brain burner, but it’s a great light (and light-hearted) filler game that will leave you with a smile on your face and a desire to play again and again. We at Purple Phoenix Games highly recommend this title, and cannot wait to see what the Kickstarter campaign has in store. May yer poop decks be sparkling and yer booty be plentiful!
  
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Beak recommended Time Bandits (1981) in Movies (curated)

 
Time Bandits (1981)
Time Bandits (1981)
1981 | Fantasy, Sci-Fi

"The first Terry Gilliam film I ever saw. I was ten years old, and it’s still my favorite (Brazil comes in at a close second). What ten-year-old wouldn’t want to be Kevin, pursued by a godlike figure, with a band of pirate dwarfs, while hopping from one major historical event to the next? I can’t remember how many times I’ve seen this, but it’s probably the same number of times I’ve watched The Goonies. —BF"

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