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2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)
2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)
2003 | Action, Drama, Mystery
Faster Than the Newer Films...But Also Much Worse
Brian O’Connor (Paul Walker) tries to redeem himself from the first film by taking out a gang of car enthusiasts.

Acting: 4

Beginning: 6

Characters: 0
These characters are about as interesting as an empty takeout box. Not only is there no kind of depth whatsoever, I never really liked the characters to begin with. I can usually deal with characters not growing if they’re at least interesting, but 2 Fast 2 Furious gives us neither. The cars have more characters than the characters themselves. Might has well let them do the talking instead.

Cinematography/Visuals: 4
Speaking from the future, the car chases/race don’t nearly have the same impact as the latter films. In comparison, they are boring and stale and aren’t enough to carry the movie. Overall it’s shot in gimmicky fashion with lots of slowmo and near-misses. It is painful to watch at times.

Conflict: 7

Entertainment Value: 5
Sometimes a movie can be so bad that it keeps your interest solely for the fact that you want to see what crappity crap crap is going to happen next. I fell asleep on more than one occasion which is a horrible thing to say about a movie that revolves around car chases. There was little in the way of redemption here.

Memorability: 5
One line made me give this score above a zero, a line I will always remember for the rest of my days. At one point, Walker almost put me in a casket by saying, “I said forget about it, cuh.” This line has since become the source of a number of memes and Youtube clips and I can still burst into laughter if I were to watch it right now. Regarding everything else about the movie? Forget about it, cuh.

Pace: 9
If I’m holding it to the standard of the latter movies, I do have to acknowledge that the movie gets through its plot at a fairly quick pace. It is easily one of the shortest in the franchise as almost all of the others top two hours. Yes, it still put me to sleep, but only because the content sucked.

Plot: 4
Sports a story that my six-year-old nephew could have come up with. Barely believable, it has holes inside of holes. I almost wish they had just said, “Screw it. Just look at the cool cars.”

Resolution: 5

Overall: 49
Dumpster fire. Burning poop. A fly walking on a windowsill with only one wing. These are all things that are more interesting than 2 Fast 2 Furious. Talk about a nightmare.
  
Lost in the Sun (2015)
Lost in the Sun (2015)
2015 |
6
6.0 (1 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Characters – John is a crook, he seems to be freshly out of prison needing to payback debts for protection in prison, he offers to take Louis to his grandparents and starts using him to help pay of the debts, showing him the life of crime, it is clear early on that he does have a connection to Louis, we are left to see what that connection is. Louis is the teenager that has been left orphaned when his mother dies, he reluctantly joins John in the cross-country trip where he gets to learn certain things he wouldn’t have before, including how to drive and how to shoot a gun. We do only meet characters along the way, some help and most are the people they are robbing.

Performances – Josh Duhamel is good in the leading role, it is one of his better performances as she shows how conflicted his character is and just how desperate he is to clear his debts, while trying to guide the teenager. Josh Wiggins is great in his role of the film, he gets to show moments of grief and moments of moving on with life as he is the one that needs to learn the biggest life lessons. The rest of the cast are solid without needing to do that much.

Story – The story here comes down to one man trying to make up for his own mistakes in life by helping a young teenage boy across country to live with his grandparents only along the way we see him teach him life lessons which could one day prepare him for the real-world. This gives us a chance to see a redemption story while also giving us a coming-of-age chapter in Louis’s life, this isn’t going to break any ground in the genre and does everything it needs to do for the characters. We do get moments of questioning moments of what Louis is forced to do and for the most we don’t get enough time to look at the crimes that have left John where he is in life.

Action – The action in the film is simple, we get a couple of weak chases and robberies, they are easy to watch and barely break into a sweat.

Settings – The film takes us across America, we don’t hit any landmarks which just shows us small town after small town or open roads.


Scene of the Movie – The final moment.

That Moment That Annoyed Me – Boys don’t just want to drive cars and shoot guns.

Final Thoughts – This is a simple coming of age film, it checks the boxes well without doing anything we haven’t seen before.

 

Overall: Coming-of-age 101
  
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Daniel Boyd (1066 KP) rated the PlayStation 4 version of Vampyr in Video Games

Oct 23, 2018 (Updated Oct 23, 2018)  
Vampyr
Vampyr
2018 | Action, Role-Playing
Atrocious Combat (3 more)
Piss-poor Voice Acting
Shabby Graphics
Soooooooo Boring
One Of The Worst Games Of The Generation
When I picked up Vampyr, I really wanted to like it. This was one of those underdog games that come out a couple of times per generation. When it was first announced and shown, it was met with groans and cringes, then when it released back in June it was received surprisingly fairly well, getting 6's and 7's across various websites.

I eventually got around to picking it up a couple of weekends ago. For the life of me, I do not understand what the reviewers that scored this game a 6 or a 7 were thinking. This game is utter garbage.

In previous things that I've written, I've spoken about the bar consistently being raised in modern gaming and how there is no longer any place for sub par mediocrity in the landscape any more. Well, this is a prime example of a game that does not belong in 2018, It would even have been dated if it had dropped in 2008. Frankly, it doesn't belong in this generation. I have played PS2 and even PS1 games with better gameplay than this trash.

When I first booted up the game, it was pretty slow to start. It seemed pretty dialogue heavy, yet the voice acting was pretty poor. I powered through it, telling myself that there are other games that start off slow and awkward and end up being great once you get stuck in. Then I was introduced to the combat. My God. I genuinely couldn't believe how stiff and awkward and dated it felt. It is so easy and monotonous as well, to the point that any fun drains almost instantly. I can confidently say that it is by far the worst combat I have experienced out of any game I have played in 2018.

The gimmick that the game's marketing seemed to be pushing leading up to it's release, was that every character in the game is important and has an extensive backstory, from main characters to randomers on the street. My question is; why should I give a shit? The vast majority of these characters have nothing important or relevant to say and the vocal performances are so dire, you find yourself button mashing the square button to skip through all of the required dialogue that you are forced to sit through.

The plan was to fly through Vampyr this week and be finished for when Red Dead Redemption 2 is released on Friday. Two and a bit hours into Vampyr, I decided that it wasn't even worth doing that and life is too short.

Overall, the most impressive thing about this game is how much Dontnod Entertainment managed to fuck up a fairly interesting premise. Do yourself a favour and avoid this game like the plague. The only reason that it isn't getting a 1 is because The Amazing Spiderman 2 also came out this generation.
  
TT
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
If you were to ask me right now, what my favorite book of the year is...I would mumble and grunt for a few minutes and then rattle off a list of at least 10 books. But without a doubt, The Thorn Keeper will be at the top of the list.

The Thorn Keeper posses a certain eloquence that enraptures you from the very beginning. I can't count the number of times that I had tears in my eyes as I read (tearing up right now in fact, thinking about the message of this story), or squealed with delight, or wanted to purse whomp someone, and there was one instance that I was in such shock, I literally felt like I was going to hurl. Out of all the books that I have read this year, The Thorn Keeper is the one that touched the depth of my soul in a way that completely turned my world upside down. The romance is so sweet and quite passionate (all clean of course), but that only scratches the surface of the content of the book.

Whether through decisions in our past or reasons unknown to us, sometimes we have been given difficulties that we have to walk through. We would not recommend making those choices and hope that others are spared the pain and suffering we have endured. Yet even though it is hard, we would not be the people we are today if we had not gone through it. God has brought us through the valley...Not so that we can look over our shoulder and long to be back on the other side, but to look forward and press onwards. Do not let your dreams be forgotten along the way. Even if it doesn't seem as if they can or will ever come true. If God has placed a dream in your heart, never let go of it. Whether it is ministry, missions, art, dance, fashion or family.

In conclusion, I would have to say that Pepper Basham's books are among the best I have ever read. Filled with hard lessons and real life, balanced with passion and faith. Only a very talented author can take someone whom I despised in book one, bring them to redemption, and within 36 pages of the book they find a way to worm their way into my heart. Catherine and David's journey of discovering true love is so very tender. When life throws them a curveball, will they rely on their own strength to make it through, or will they trust in the love of the Father to carry them? In order to truly understand and appreciate Catherine and David's history, I highly recommend reading The Thorn Bearer first (which is another favorite of mine).

I purchased a print copy of The Thorn Keeper for my personal enjoyment. I was not required to write a review, positive or otherwise. All opinions expressed are mine alone.
  
Playing for Keeps (2012)
Playing for Keeps (2012)
2012 | Comedy, Drama, Sport
4
6.0 (12 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Gerard Butler has stepped out of his 300 uniform and into some soccer
cleats. As a former international soccer star, George (Butler) is down on
his luck. He has no job, and he’s living in Virginia, attempting to
reconnect with his estranged son.

The story opens with some backstory about George’s past before quickly
tumbling into his present situation. George’s ex-wife (Jessica Biel) is
getting remarried, and his son Lewis (Noah Lomax) is having a hard time
learning to trust his real father after being separated for so long.

The plot quickly unfolds into a predictable “chick-flick” scenario, where
the main character is floundering and wants to get back what he once had.
His path to redemption comes in the form of coaching his son’s youth
soccer team, while fending off hordes of attractive soccer *moms* who want
to place hands on the well-sculpted Coach Dryer!

This film is incredibly formulaic, and it’s predictable every step of the
way. That said, Butler, Biel, and the rest of t*he cast* do an exceptional
job given what they had to work with. I even have to give some props to
the young actor, Noah Lomax, for giving a noteworthy performance as the
son.

While there were some great chuckles and all-out laughs mixed with a few
touching moments, it’s hard to look past the poor production values of this
film. Many of the scenes were filmed in a free-hand format. The shaking is
not just noticeable, but rampant throughout the film. It’s very
distracting, and downright shoddy film-making.

The directing wasn’t bad, in general, but I think a more seasoned director
would have at least chosen better angles. Case-in-point: many of the
scenes involving the red Ferrari were obviously lit with bright, white
lights reflecting off the surface of the car, giving us a view of grips and
other personnel behind the camera.

Dennis Quaid starts the film with a great role, and delivers a fantastic
performance. Unfortunately, after the jail scene, he’s oddly absent until
the end of the film. His absence was so awkward that it distracted me from
the people who were on the screen. I even asked myself: where did Dennis
Quaid’s character go?

Uma Thurman, playing Quaid’s character’s wife, and Catherine-Zeta Jones,
playing a soccer mom, did a marvelous job (again, despite not having much
to work with).

The Hollywood stars saved this film from rating lower, due to their vast
acting experience and talent, but I can’t recommend the movie as a whole.
Even their performances weren’t enough to keep Playing For Keeps in the
same ballpark as a well-produced film. It’s shoddy movie-making at best.

I recommend you wait to watch this one at home and save your movie theater
budget for another flick, *but if you are into chick-flicks, Playing for
Keeps will not disappoint.*
  
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Borat: Subsequent Moviefilm (2020)
Borat: Subsequent Moviefilm (2020)
2020 | Comedy
Sacha Baron Cohen is back as his alter-ego Borat who once again brings plenty of laughs and biting commentary in his wake.

The film opens with Borat in a labor camp as the government was not pleased with how Kazakhstan was not pleased with how they came off in the prior film. He is given a chance at redemption and asked to deliver a gift to the U.S. in order to gain favor for the ruler of the country.

Borat goes home before embarking on his trip and finds his family no accepts him save for his daughter Sandra (Irina Novak). Since women are treated worse than animals in their culture Borat is dismissive of her and heads to America to complete his mission.

Naturally things do not go as planned such as being recognized which forces him to take on various disguises. If anyone has ever seen Cohen at work before they know what is coming as various outrageous comedic scenarios are setup and then conducted in front of unsuspecting real people who are unusually candid.

While interviews of famous people are often how he operates; there are multiple instances from shops to social clubs and offices where the scenarios unfold. No matter how shocking and outrageous the scenario; people let their guards day and say some really shocking things and give their reactions unconcerned with the camera no matter how bad they come off.

Cohen reportedly had to wear a bullet proof vest at times during the making of the film as he goes into some real hotspots involving armed and radical individuals as well as Conservative hotspots in order to complete a scenario.

The humor can be very crude and shocking to the point of jaw dropping; but it is very well setup and executed and the fact that so many of the people involved have no idea they are part of a bit and their unfiltered reactions and comments shock and entertain.

The fact that regardless of his persons from Ali-G to Borat and Bruno as well as those he introduced on Who is America; shows that Cohen is truly able to alter himself and become the various characters he portrays so completely that they continue to fool some very high-ranking individuals into taking part in on camera interviews and let their guards down to give unfiltered responses.

Irina Novak is a real surprise as she is a perfect match for Cohen and she immerses herself so fully in the character that she matches Cohen perfectly no matter how outrageous the scenario and even pulls off some amazing segments by herself.

While the film does drag a slight bit towards the end, the number of jokes and the very biting political and social commentary will make the film a very controversial and for many funny film that fans of Cohen and the first film will not want to miss.
  
6 Below: Miracle on the Mountain (2017)
6 Below: Miracle on the Mountain (2017)
2017 |
6
6.0 (1 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Characters – Eric LeMarque had a future as one of the top ice hockey players, he threw this away with hiss reckless behaviour which has seen his career all but gone. With his addiction taking over his life, he finds himself hitting rock bottom and needing to find some hope. Heading for a snowboard away from the world he ends up lost in the harsh wilderness doing everything he can to survive in the conditions which will test his desire to get over his addictions and rebuild his life. Susan is his mother, she has always supported her son and will do anything to help him put his life back on track and is the first to notice he hasn’t been heard from for days. Sarah is one of the rescue team on the mountain, she leads the search once they learn that Eric is missing.

Performances – Josh Hartnett in the leading role does a good job, even if it feels slightly mis-cast because you get the feeling Eric was a lot younger than Hartnett. Mira Sorvino and Sarah Dumont are both solid in the supporting roles as we see them both needing to make difficult decisions.

Story – The story here follows the incredible survival story of Eric LeMarque as he faces days lost in the snow-covered mountain range without anyone searching for him for days, while also battling his own demons of addiction. The story itself is based on the real events that happened to the man who needed to rebuild his life. This does show us just how hard the survival was, though it just doesn’t become the truly engrossing story it could have been, because anything that happens is something we have seen before, be it wolves or injuries. Eric isn’t the most likely guy either because anyone that throws away a sporting career for drugs frustrates the audience. The rescue side of the film either needed to be a bigger involvement or not involved at all, we simply don’t get enough focus on what is happening on this side of the film.

Adventure/Biopic – The adventure side of the film shows us just what could go wrong for an ambitious rush can turn into a battle to survive. The biopic side of the film shows us the days which Eric is lost in the harsh snowy mountain conditions as he battles to survive and his own demons.

Settings – The film puts us in the mountain range covered in snow, showing us how easy it could be to become lost and how hard it would be to survive.


Scene of the Movie – The climb.

That Moment That Annoyed Me – Hartnett feels too old for this role.

Final Thoughts – This is a by the book survival story, it does show an incredible fight to survive and does give us a form of redemption for a young man who was throwing his life away.

 

Overall: By the books survival film.

Rating