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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated 10,000 B.C. (2008) in Movies
Sep 21, 2020
ππ΄π΄π±π°π€π’ππΊπ±π΅π°. Visciously non-entertaining and laborious. There needs to be some honorary award granted to anyone who can finish this shit without turning it off, seriously. Super dodgy CGI aside, how can a film with such stunning locales and costumes still look like total shit until the last act? The video quality at times resembles a pirated DVD rip. Besides that, vigorously rote - another utterly faceless underdog story about destiny or heroism or selflessness or whatever, who cares? There's a scene early on where the characters are fighting some uglyass dinosaurs in cartoonish-looking tall grass (by the way, the ONLY time dinosaurs are used in this B.C. ACTION MOVIE) which is one of the worst looking things ever spat onto a screen. He at least tries here but I can't believe there was ever a time where Steven Strait was eyed as lead material. Among the most palled ways you could have excecuted this, Emmerich is in full ππͺπ₯πΈπ’πΊ mode here: an out-and-out non-movie peddled off as entertainment through bloat and blind, unremarkable action. Watchable for maybe 15 minutes but bland in the extreme. Lest we even mention how it breaks up its subtitle lines into like 4 syllables a piece before switching because it assumes whoever is watching this must be an idiot.
Awix (3310 KP) rated Starcrash (1979) in Movies
Apr 25, 2019
Frankly astounding Star Wars rip-off featuring the likes of Christopher Plummer, Caroline Munro, and David Hasselhoff; none of them talk about it much these days, funnily enough. The plot concerns an oddly familiar mixture of inter-galactic royalty, space smugglers, evil space stations, vaguely-explained mysticism and laser-sword fights; none of it makes a great deal of sense, naturally.
Much to enjoy here, obviously: my favourite bit is possibly Elle the robot sheriff, who is basically a hillbilly with a bucket on his head, although Zarth Arn and his Doom Planet are also highly entertaining. Impossible to take remotely seriously, of course, but in a sensible world you would say the same thing about many film and TV series which people take very seriously indeed. When asked why he made this film, Christopher Plummer explained it was because the studio was in Rome - 'I'll do porno, as long as it's in Rome,' he said. I suppose making Starcrash was a reasonable silver medal if there was no porno available.
Much to enjoy here, obviously: my favourite bit is possibly Elle the robot sheriff, who is basically a hillbilly with a bucket on his head, although Zarth Arn and his Doom Planet are also highly entertaining. Impossible to take remotely seriously, of course, but in a sensible world you would say the same thing about many film and TV series which people take very seriously indeed. When asked why he made this film, Christopher Plummer explained it was because the studio was in Rome - 'I'll do porno, as long as it's in Rome,' he said. I suppose making Starcrash was a reasonable silver medal if there was no porno available.
Awix (3310 KP) rated Lust for a Vampire (1971) in Movies
Feb 17, 2018 (Updated Feb 17, 2018)
I Was A Teenage Lesbian Vampire in a Girl's Boarding School
Largely risible Hammer vampire movie. After the censors objected to all the not-very-subtly-implied lesbianism in The Vampire Lovers, the studio replaced that with a story about a schoolteacher becoming infatuated with one of his pupils and starting a torrid romance with her, which apparently was seen as less problematic (it was the 70s, I suppose).
Initially conceived as another vehicle for Ingrid Pitt and Peter Cushing, to be directed by Terence Fisher; in the end Pitt did Countess Dracula instead, Cushing passed due to family problems, and Fisher was replaced by Jimmy Sangster. The result is a prurient melodrama largely untroubled by subtlety, style, or acting talent (Ralph Bates is not too bad in the role earmarked for Cushing). The sex and nudity which is essentially the film's sine qua non feels very tame by modern standards; the pop song on the soundtrack will make discriminating viewers want to rip their own ears off.
Initially conceived as another vehicle for Ingrid Pitt and Peter Cushing, to be directed by Terence Fisher; in the end Pitt did Countess Dracula instead, Cushing passed due to family problems, and Fisher was replaced by Jimmy Sangster. The result is a prurient melodrama largely untroubled by subtlety, style, or acting talent (Ralph Bates is not too bad in the role earmarked for Cushing). The sex and nudity which is essentially the film's sine qua non feels very tame by modern standards; the pop song on the soundtrack will make discriminating viewers want to rip their own ears off.
BobbiesDustyPages (1259 KP) rated Nightcrawler (2014) in Movies
Mar 24, 2018 (Updated Mar 24, 2018)
How do I rate a movie that I couldnt even finish
Okay so like it says on the tin I find it so hard to rate this movie because I never actually got around to finishing it but it's because of that fact that I have to rate it so high.
I inly made about 30 mintues in and had to turn it off because Jake Gyllenhaal made me so fucking uncomfortable while watching it that I just couldn't get myself to finish the movie.
Jake Gyllenhaal has always been of those actors that just embodies the roles he plays to the point that you can forget that your watching movie and not watching a real person living their day to day life and Nightcrawler was just too much for me.
Ever single even just left me with this deep seeded feeling of foreboding that made me so uncomfortable that I could not physically get myself to keep watching.
And to that I have to rip my hat because I have never felt like that watching a movie before.
I inly made about 30 mintues in and had to turn it off because Jake Gyllenhaal made me so fucking uncomfortable while watching it that I just couldn't get myself to finish the movie.
Jake Gyllenhaal has always been of those actors that just embodies the roles he plays to the point that you can forget that your watching movie and not watching a real person living their day to day life and Nightcrawler was just too much for me.
Ever single even just left me with this deep seeded feeling of foreboding that made me so uncomfortable that I could not physically get myself to keep watching.
And to that I have to rip my hat because I have never felt like that watching a movie before.
Becs (244 KP) rated I Know You Know in Books
Jan 4, 2019
Alright book
I received the audiobook version through a giveaway that Book Riot hosted.
So, anybody that knows me knows that I am not a fan of audio books. Well, I won this one from a giveaway and thought why the heck not. It's a thriller, so I should love it. I'll admit, there were good parts, there were bad parts, and there were parts that made me want to rip my face off.
The speakers were good, they helped with the different voices instead of having one person doing all of the voices. But man, the first half of the "book" was an utter bore that seemed to drag me through the dirt and into the burning pits of hell to rot away. I'm not kidding. I can't say anything on the writing style as it was told to me and not read by me. But from what I could tell, the author seemed like a good writer but just didn't deliver the punch that was needed.
Want to read more? Go to my blog: bookingwayreads.wordpress.com
So, anybody that knows me knows that I am not a fan of audio books. Well, I won this one from a giveaway and thought why the heck not. It's a thriller, so I should love it. I'll admit, there were good parts, there were bad parts, and there were parts that made me want to rip my face off.
The speakers were good, they helped with the different voices instead of having one person doing all of the voices. But man, the first half of the "book" was an utter bore that seemed to drag me through the dirt and into the burning pits of hell to rot away. I'm not kidding. I can't say anything on the writing style as it was told to me and not read by me. But from what I could tell, the author seemed like a good writer but just didn't deliver the punch that was needed.
Want to read more? Go to my blog: bookingwayreads.wordpress.com
Awix (3310 KP) rated The Trollenberg Terror (1958) in Movies
Jun 22, 2019 (Updated Jun 22, 2019)
Independent sci-fi movie has the inevitable hokeyness of films of its period but shows flashes of intelligence, until the climax at least. Vaguely Lovecraftian alien creatures take up residence atop a Swiss mountain, rip the heads off passing mountaineers, turn other people into zombies to eliminate nosey psychics, and so on. Fearing the world supply of cuckoo clocks, cheese with holes in it, and multi-purpose knives may be in peril, a group of assorted boffins attempt to sort things out.
Well, at least it's original, if not always in the best of ways. Things proceed in a relatively effective way until the aliens decide to come down the mountain and attack in person, at which point they are revealed to be tentacled monocular blobs entirely beyond the budget of the film to convincingly realise. The same could be said of many alien invasion and monster movies of the 50s and 60s and this is neither the best nor the worst example of the genre from that period.
Well, at least it's original, if not always in the best of ways. Things proceed in a relatively effective way until the aliens decide to come down the mountain and attack in person, at which point they are revealed to be tentacled monocular blobs entirely beyond the budget of the film to convincingly realise. The same could be said of many alien invasion and monster movies of the 50s and 60s and this is neither the best nor the worst example of the genre from that period.
Joven (172 KP) rated Kemet in Tabletop Games
Aug 12, 2019 (Updated Aug 12, 2019)
Forces aggressive play creating a fast game with a lot of back and forth (2 more)
Awesome miniature models with great details
Well balanced with a smart combat system
Worship, wars and wrecked plans
Initially Kemet can seem a little intimidating with a big selection of power-up cards with a wide variety of benefits and costs. There are so many paths to victory that it might take a couple of games to get your head around it. Once you do start to figure everything out though it's a really fun game, and the victory conditions and points system force players to be aggressive and lead to a real sense of power struggle between the factions.
I've only played this with the full 5 players and imagine it might be quite different with fewer, but I would definitely recommend people give it a go. It's also a blatant stargate rip-off, but I don't count that against it!
I've only played this with the full 5 players and imagine it might be quite different with fewer, but I would definitely recommend people give it a go. It's also a blatant stargate rip-off, but I don't count that against it!
Black Farce and Cue Ball Wizards: The Inside Story of the Snooker World
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Throughout its chequered history, snooker has had more than its fair share of heroes and villains,...
Letts Rip!
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Throughout the New Labour years - that decade of deceit, that era of wretched wriggle - the Daily...
Awix (3310 KP) rated Beginning of the End (1957) in Movies
Apr 7, 2021
Minor entry in the 50s atomic bug cycle hits nearly all the same beats as Them!, only on a much lower budget. Scientists playing with atoms accidentally make grasshoppers grow to giant size; they naturally start trying to eat Chicago. Peter Graves captures a grasshopper and hooks it up to a lie detector in the hope of finding a solution. (This really is the plot.)
Sort-of has a reputation as one of the worst films ever made, but it's decently structured despite a few corny sections and has a go at providing all the things you want from a sci-fi B-movie about monster insects. The stink around the film come from the special effects, which are frequently dreadful, but on the other hand the script is wildly overambitious and the effects guys are clearly doing the best they can in a hopeless situation. It's still a rip-off largely facilitated by a combination of stock footage and inept back-projection, but by no means unwatchable. Them! is still vastly better in every respect, though.
Sort-of has a reputation as one of the worst films ever made, but it's decently structured despite a few corny sections and has a go at providing all the things you want from a sci-fi B-movie about monster insects. The stink around the film come from the special effects, which are frequently dreadful, but on the other hand the script is wildly overambitious and the effects guys are clearly doing the best they can in a hopeless situation. It's still a rip-off largely facilitated by a combination of stock footage and inept back-projection, but by no means unwatchable. Them! is still vastly better in every respect, though.