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Alone For Christmas (2013)
Alone For Christmas (2013)
2013 | Sci-Fi
7
7.0 (1 Ratings)
Movie Rating
UK DVD release title, Bone Alone.
Shopping in Tesco each week involves a traditional visit to the DVD aisle to look for bargains and new releases. At this time of year that also means some quality seasonal content that you've never heard of before... and so I give you, Bone Alone!

When Bone gets in trouble for the antics of his little brother Columbus he's banished to a dogsitter as the family go off for the holidays.

Bone, with the help of the other dogs, makes an escape after he realises his home is in danger. A group of burglars have their sights set on their valuables, but this is Bone's house and he has to defend it.

Its original title was Alone For Christmas, let's face it though, that's just not as good as Bone Alone. Is it a rip off of Home Alone featuring dogs or is it porn... who knows?!

The first thing you will notice about Bone Alone is the absolutely ridiculous effects used to animate the dog's mouths, it's truly awful, but thankfully it's easily forgotten once you get into it because... dare I say it? This film is pretty entertaining.

Add some dogs to a film and you've got me keen, get those dogs to execute a Home Alone plan on some unscrupulous baddies? Sold! Bone does not let his lack of opposable thumbs stop him making his house a fortress that even Kevin would be proud of. Honestly, I don't know how he thought of some of them, I'll be adding them to my own battle plan options shortly.

We've obviously got quality acting from the canine contingent, especially from our lead actors, Hooligan and Torpedo playing Bone and Columbus. Plus there are lots of little cameos from other floofy talents.

The human cast is classic TV movie, acting that's just cheesy enough that the film appears to not take itself too seriously. It's headed up by one of TV's favourite dads, David DeLuise, and as always he's the right sort of amusing to make the role work. The villains have your favourite traits but out of the three of them my favourite was definitely Phil played by John Kenward, he's the adorable buffoon that you really kind of feel for in the whole thing.

Generally the cast isn't made up of people you'd recognise, but then you spot Kevin Sorbo... I don't know what he's channelling when it comes to this role but it's not entirely good. There's a whole section of his story that I zoned out of, that was probably the only part of this masterpiece that I didn't get along with.


Bone Alone is a really fun film because it's equal parts ridiculous and amusing. I can't say there's much in it that's going to make cinematic history but I liked it and that's really all that matters.

Originally posted on: http://emmaatthemovies.blogspot.com/2019/12/bone-alone-movie-review.html
  
Posthuman
Posthuman
2015 | Adventure, Dice Game, Exploration, Fighting, Science Fiction
So many storytellers have attempted to predict, or at least depict, the future of humanity. Many assert that a cataclysmic event will trigger some dark post-apocalyptic culture of humanity’s last breath on Earth. Others would have us fleeing to the stars to colonize and begin our species anew. But what if the former was correct and instead of becoming X-Men humans would rapidly mutate and become… something else entirely?

Posthuman is set in that dark post-apocalyptic horrorscape and is an exploration adventure game with character upgrading and dice-driven combat. The twist here is that humans are trying to escape the mutant creatures to The Fortress, a safe haven for all, but once infected may turn mutant and also turn on the party to prevent that glorious end. In this review, however, I will be playing through the solo rules, and they do not have players turning into mutants during the game. Bummer, eh?

DISCLAIMER: We are using the Kickstarter Deluxe version of the game. We do have the Defiant expansion from the KS campaign, but will not be using it for this review (I don’t think). Also, we do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rule book, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy from the publisher directly or from your FLGS. -T


To setup consult the rulebook, as there are so many decks of cards and character setup steps that need to happen that I just cannot detail here. Once setup your play area will look something like the photo below. Once setup is complete you are ready to begin your journey to The Fortress.
Posthuman is played over a series of rounds until the player wins or loses. The only way to win is to enter The Fortress before the Event deck runs out, and obviously the only way to lose is to run the Event deck out of cards or become a mutant by suffering five scars.

A round consists of several phases. The first phase is Event Resolution. The player will flip the top Event card and resolve its text. These Events could be a one-shot bad (or good) thing for the player, or may be an ongoing Seasonal Event that will stay in play until another Seasonal Event is drawn.

After the Events, characters will need to Eat to survive. Characters will be able to forage for food in a subsequent phase, but know that food is very important and if characters go too long without eating they will be suffering penalties of their Health and Morale.

Once fed (or starved, I suppose), the player will Declare an Action from the following: Camp, Forage, Scout, or Move (in multiplayer there is an additional action as well). To Camp players will forego any other action to heal their character. When a character Forages they will flip the current tile’s marker to show it may no longer be foraged and draw a Supplies card to see what supplies they will be able to gather. These could be more food tokens, ammo, equipment or weapons. To Scout a character will draw terrain tiles equal to the number of exits shown on their current terrain tile. The player will place the tiles however they want and this will provide insight into future locations and what they may hold. Lastly a player may Move into a connected terrain tile and begin having encounters upon it.

Most of the action in Posthuman comes as a result of having encounters on terrain tiles. Depending on where the character meeple is located on the Central Board track encounters will be drawn from the level one, two, or three decks and encountered immediately. Most of the encounters are combats, and I could write another whole post on combat, but I will spare you the details and merely say that combat is very involved and encompasses many steps to resolve. At the end of the combat a character may receive the encountered creature card as a VP trophy to be spent later on upgrades. The VP card may also instruct the player to move the meeple one space closer to The Fortress on the Central Board track. The other type of encounter card presents choices for the player to make or stat tests to overcome via die rolls.


Play continues in this fashion until the player wins by reaching The Fortress, or by losing to the forces set against them.
Components. This box is chock FULL of components and they are all super high-quality and enjoyable to play with. I do have a couple issues with some bits. Firstly, the player boards are quite small, and the tracking cubes are not meant for big meaty paws at all. Similarly, the tracking chits to be used for stats on the player board are flimsy and don’t really stay in place too well. Also the game comes with two different shades of gray player meeple colors and NOT a purple option. Shame! Shame! Shame!

When all is said and done Posthuman delivers an exciting experience on the table for a solo player and indulges the player’s need to roll dice on the regular. Just me? Didn’t think so. The combat is great, but I found myself discarding more enemies than defeating in some games and that is quite annoying. One game I refused to Scout at all and that totally bit me in the booty. So Scout, y’all.

Just know that playing this solo is NOT a cakewalk at all. I watched a playthrough video where the host won the game but nearly every roll of the die was favorable and every combat successful. Even still, she nearly ran out of time and lost the game. So games really can come down to the wire. Now, I haven’t really gotten very close to winning yet, but my day is coming!


I like this one a lot, and will certainly be going back to it for my solo plays. I have been playing some really great solo games lately, and I am very thankful for that. Posthuman, however, I don’t think will get much multiplayer action at my house. The rules are plentiful and the people I normally game with do not enjoy rules-heavy games. Similarly, I don’t think the theme is for everyone. I dig it, but different strokes and all. If you are in the market for a new (to you) game that can be played solo or multiplayer with an interesting theme and is pretty difficult, look up Posthuman. Just stay away from the mutants. These do NOT want to recruit you to their school for gifted people.
  
Whiteout (2009)
Whiteout (2009)
2009 | Action, Mystery, Thriller
6
6.7 (9 Ratings)
Movie Rating
For US Marshal Carrie Stetko (Kate Beckinsale), a remote posting in Antarctica was exactly what she needed to regroup after a harrowing assignment took an unexpected and devastating turn.
Unfortunately for Kate, she and the assorted scientists and support personal at the remote research base are about to become pawns in a deadly scenario in the new film “Whiteout”.

In the coldest place on earth, Carrie and many of her fellow expatriates look to evacuate the base for warmer climates before a big winter storm arrives which will signal the start of the severe winter and restrict any travel to and from the base.

Having grown tired of two years of little more than dealing with misdemeanors, Carrie has turned in her resignation and looks forward to what the future holds as does her friend Dr. Fury (Tom Skerritt), who has decided to head back home on the last flight out in 72 hours.

As the camp plans the seasonal evacuation, Carrie is dispatched with Dr. Fury and their pilot Delfy (Columbus Short), to investigate what appears to be a body in the middle of a desolate area. Their fears are soon realized when a badly disfigured body is found which is at first classified as an accident, but to many things about the condition and location of the body do not add up.

Although highly skeptical as there has never been a murder in Antarctica, and knowing the reporting it as such would cancel her trip home so the Feds can do an investigation, Carrie sets out to get to the bottom of the mystery.

As she begins to follow the trail of clues, a mysterious figure kills a suspected witness and makes an attempt on Carrie’s life. The arrival shortly thereafter by an ex military specialist working for the U.N. named Robert Pryce (Gabriel Macht), raises suspicions as he was dispatched very quickly to the locale after the murder was reported and with a severe storm hours away, the arrival of Price is seem as a bad omen.
As the film goes on, Carrie realizes that she has become involved in an old mystery where people are only too willing to commit murder to posses the secrets and that there severe weather coming in is the least dangerous thing in her life.

Not knowing where to turn and who she can trust, Carrie must overcome all manner of challenges to solve the mystery and bring those responsible to justice.

At first the film is rife with potential as the great setting and premise for the film is very interesting. My mind wandered to John Carpenter’s classic version of “The Thing”, which also used the remote locale of Antarctica to set its tale. The unique and deadly beauty of the place undermines the isolation of the characters as they are truly alone with danger amongst them.

Sadly the film has several plot holes and surprisingly lacks any real or sustained tension. There were key sequences in the film which were life and death struggles amongst a ranging storm, yet unfolded in a very ho hum manner.

I learned that the film sat for nearly two years waiting to be released which is never a good sign. That being said, despite the issues, “Whiteout” does have some entertainment value which is in large part thanks to the cast who make the best they can with the material and make the film a watchable if flawed effort.
  
A Haunting In Cawdor (2016)
A Haunting In Cawdor (2016)
2016 | Horror
5
6.0 (2 Ratings)
Movie Rating
The psychological thriller is another genre that seems to have taken a ‘back seat’ to the big budget action films, horror, and comedies in recent years. Or if there were any good psychological thrillers to hit the theater or the internet I either didn’t hear about them or they didn’t really make much of an impact. Personally when I think of that genre the first name to come to mind is Alfred Hitchcook. I’m sure if I sat down and thought about it, I could think of a movie that falls into that category I’ve seen since then but I don’t have that kind of time. What I do have time for is to tell you about a movie that is certainly a step in the right direction.

Uncork’ed Entertainment’s ‘A Haunting In Cawdor’ available March 11th, is written and directed by Phil Wurtzel and revisits this genre of film with an impressive cast in attempt to breathe new life into psychological terror. Vivian Miller (Shelby Young of American Horror Story) is a young troubled woman who is serving out her jail sentence along with a group of convicts with a work release program in a small Midwestern town. Specifically, at the Cawdor Barn Theater. A rundown seasonal summer run by Lawrence O’Neil (Cary Elwes of A Princess Bride and The X-Files) a failed Broadway director who has taken it upon himself to stage amateur productions with young parolees.

It doesn’t take long once the movie starts for the quote ‘madness’ to begin. The moment Vivian sets foot in town, she starts to hallucinate. A local boy Roddy (Michael Welch of The Twilight Saga, Z Nation, Scandal) takes an immediate interest in her but disappears shortly thereafter. Once the group arrives at the theater they are told that along with helping with the theater’s upkeep part of the group’s probation is to put on a stage production of William Shakespeare’s ‘MacBeth’ which has not been performed at the theater in 15 years. While the everyone is preparing to upgrade the theater and rehearse for the play Vivian finds an old VHS cassette with a recording of the theater’s last performance of ‘MacBeth’. As it turns out the young girl that was cast in the lead for that performance Jeanette (Alexandria Deberry), the same role Vivian has been cast in, was found dead not long after and upon viewing the tape unintentionally releases an evil force that has some sort of connection to Lawrence who has begun to act superstitiously. At first Vivian tries to write these instances off as hallucinations brought about by her own personal demons and a lack of medication which her psychiatrist Dr. Lazarus (Peter Floch) readily agrees with. Things take an even more otherworldly turn though when the spirit of the dead girl begins to communicate with Vivian through the tape and the mystery surrounding her death and that of her mysterious admirer Roddy and his connection to Lawrence and the play all converge just days before the play.

This film is definitely the kind of thing you’d want to watch in the dark and preferably on a stormy night as well. You had a great cast composed of veterans and up-and-comers combined with a basic premise. The movie did seem to lack something though. There was very little regarding the interpersonal relationships between the characters in the movie and how they got along with one another. Mostly just a few scenes of the group presumably drinking alcohol which they were not supposed to have to begin with. There was also the fact that you learn Vivian’s crime but not why she did it and they continually poke at the subject in the brief flashbacks. There were also the ending of the film which, after the grand finale, makes no sense whatsoever. There’s no resolution and not in the sense that it was written that way purposely. There were a few directions the movie could’ve explored in that hour and 40 minutes but didn’t which would added more to the film. It could almost be compared to having a bunch of people run every path in a maze except the one path that would lead you out of it.
The one thing that saved the film was the cast and their performances. I can give this film 2 1/2 stars because of that. It’s worth watching once for that aspect alone.
  
Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp
Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp
Games
I don't really play a lot of games on my phone. I did play Pokemon Go for a while, but got a little burned out on it. The only other games I really play on my phone are Words With Friends, Crosswords With Friends, and Neko Atsume. That last one is a game with cats so of course it's on my phone since I am a cat lover.

When I heard Nintendo was working on Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp a game for mobile devices and that it would be free to play, I was excited. I love the Animal Crossing games because they are cheerful and fun with activities you could do such as fishing, redecorating your house in various themes, or interacting with the animal villagers in town.

With Pocket Camp there isn't a town. Instead, you have your own RV and your own campsite which you can decorate any way you wish. You can make friends with various animal characters and receive gifts and crafting materials for them when you trade them things they want such as certain types of seashells. They can also visit your campsite as well as your human friends via invitation or at random. There are different recreational areas you can visit on the world map such as a beach where you can fish or a little island where you can collect insects. There's even an area for mining, but you need the help of five people on your friends list or pay a certain amount of microtransaction currency known as leaf tickets. You can also visit a place called OK Motors where you can upgrade your RV, add an upstairs to it, or paint it in interesting patterns and colors.



Getting around on the map is easy. Click on a place and go.


Fishing is one of the recreational activities you can do.

Crafting is another big thing in Pocket Camp. You can gather materials such as cotton and wood for crafting furniture by fulfilling requests for your animal friends like gifting them with types of fruit or seashells they want. This not only levels up your friendship with them, they will gift you with crafting materials and sometimes outfits. They will also hang out at your campsite when you invite them. The maximum amount of animals you can host at your campsite is ten. You can also send animals home via the user menu so that you can invite new animals to your campsite.


Host animals at your campsite, do favors, receive gifts.

If you're in the mood to do a little shopping, there is a marketplace you can travel to on the map. You can buy outfits and accessories from the Able sisters or you can buy furniture from Timmy and Tommy Nook, Tom Nook's twin sons. You can also sell furniture and outfits from your inventory to the Nook twins.


Doing a little shopping at the marketplace.

Personally, I liked decorating my RV and adding a second floor. Crafting the furniture and items for my little traveling home was fun and I enjoyed decorating it the way I wanted. I liked decorating the campsite as well especially after I expanded it so I could add more items for visitors to enjoy.



Decorating your RV is fun!

There are daily goals and stretch goals you can do that offer crafting materials, leaf tickets, or bells (the name of the money used in the game) as rewards. You can also visit your friends campsites to see how they decorate theirs and give them kudos when you visit. I thought it was very cool seeing how much variety there is in each of the campsites I visited and showed the uniqueness and style of each of my friends.



Visit your friends campsites. It's fun!

Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp is relaxing fun. There's no pressure or time limits. You can just enjoy yourself doing what you wish whether it's fishing or hanging out with your animal and human friends at your campsite. It's cute and colorful with a variety of things to craft and outfits to collect. Some may think it's a bit repetitive, but I don't mind that part of it. It's nice to log in and get my daily bonus, do a few things I like, and see what changes my friends have made to their campsites.

With it being the holiday season, Nintendo did a Christmas update for the game. You can now craft Christmas items, a Santa Claus outfit, and Christmas gifts. It has been fun decorating my campsite for Christmas and seeing all the Christmas cheer at my friends' campsites. I'm looking forward to the next seasonal event items they do. In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the Christmas items and the entire game itself.
  
Last Christmas (2019)
Last Christmas (2019)
2019 | Comedy, Romance
London, looking beautiful (0 more)
Unfunny and forced comedy (0 more)
Alas, Christmas
Oh Dear! Now I wouldn't go as far as saying I had "high hopes" for this film, but as a real fan of the goo-fest that is "Love Actually" I at least thought this might fill some seasonal void in the run up to the festive season. "Best Christmas film of the decade!!" screams the marketing. Er... no.

This review will be spoiler free.

The plot: Kate (Emilia Clarke) is an immigrant from the former-Yugoslavia now living in London. She has a dead-end job working for "Santa" (Michelle Yeoh) in a Christmas shop in Covent Garden. She is perennially lubricated both with drink and other bodily fluids thanks to her hedonistic lifestyle. And she really likes George Michael.

But life just seems vacuous and to have no purpose for her anymore. Her composure is not helped by her mother (Emma Thompson) constantly fussing about her health, since Kate has only recently recovered from a serious illness.

Dropping into her life then comes Tom (Henry Golding). Smartly dressed and calmly reassuring, Tom seems to have the potential to start turning Kate's life around. But is she prepared to listen?

There are startling similarities here with Phoebe Waller-Bridge's triumphant tribute to hedonistic 30-something sex-addicted females everywhere.... "Fleabag". Kate is similarly louche, hopping from bed to bed in a heartbeat. She has a dysfunctional family and - most strikingly - she has a particularly difficult relationship with her high-achieving sister. This is not helped by a remarkable similarity between the actress playing Marta (Lydia Leonard ) and Fleabag's Clare (Sian Clifford). But whereas Fleabag is both brilliantly written, heart-rending and hilarious, this simply is not.

There were a total of two laughs in the movie for me. Period. Both were lines delivered by Emma Thompson, and if you've seen the film you probably know the ones. Now, I'm aware that Thompson co-wrote the script and she is, of course, a national acting treasure. But here the script is clunky and all of the "comic" scenes are so laboured and forced that they land like leaden weights.

And some of it makes no sense whatsoever. There is some strange Danish sauerkraut salesman (Peter Mygind) with a crush on "Santa". He suddenly appears in the shop acting like some escaped mental patient. When he first appears, acting bizarrely, you think, "oh, there must be some fascinating backstory between these two - a murky past they are trying to rekindle". But no! This is the first time they have EVER met? It's completely bonkers!

Much was made of this being Michelle Yeoh's "first comedy". Sorry, but if she proves anything here it is that she is not a comic actress.

Emilia Clarke is still looking to land in a decent mainstream role outside "Game of Thrones", after a failed Terminator sequel, a half-decent weepie ("Me Before You") and the commercial failure that was "Solo". Here she certainly looks curvaciously cute as the Christmas elf. But unfortunately cute can't save her from the car-crash of a script.

Similarly Henry Golding is well-dressed eye-candy for the ladies, almost doing a re-tread of his cool and laid-back character from the excellent "Crazy Rich Asians". Without the same need to be "zany", he fairs slightly better from the script. But again, this feels like one to shuffle into a quiet corner of his CV.

What can I say that's even remotely good about this? Three things:

1) London. It looks glorious, decked out in lights like some chocolate-box-cover cum tourist-board publicity shot. London is one of the most photogenic cities on the planet, and I could relate to Tom's mantra to "look up" and see all of the architectural quirks and foibles that exist around every corner in that wonderful city;
2) The payoff. Exactly when you get the payoff will depend on how much you know going in (if you've managed to avoid the trailer... continue to avoid it!) and how attentive you are. There's an "aha!" moment. And it's nicely played out.
3) There's a topical xenophobic Brexit angle, that's a little clumsy in the exposition but - in my view - is good for the telling.

This is a movie desperately trying to blend "Love Actually" with another Christmas classic (no... not "Die Hard"... but to say more would introduce spoilers!) But in my view it misses badly.

The director is Paul Feig, famous for "Bridesmaids" and "Spy" and infamous for the female "Ghostbusters" reboot.

There are clearly lovers of this film. At the time of writing it has made an impressive $51M on its $25M budget. But I went with another three cinema-goers from my family, all of differing ages and sentiments: and we all universally agreed on the rating for this one.

(For the graphical review, please check out One Mann's Movies here - https://bob-the-movie-man.com/2019/11/25/one-manns-movies-film-review-last-christmas-2019/ . Thanks).