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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Phoenix Forgotten (2017) in Movies
Sep 19, 2020
For what it's worth this is incredibly, incredibly convincing for what it is. The problem is that it's actually *too* convincing - this is so caught up in crafting a dead-ringer documentary (albeit admirably so) that it forgets to actually put horror movie stuff in too until the last act when this type of movie is required to spiral out of control. Essentially a beat-for-beat ripoff of all three Blair Witch movies but with aliens instead of the witch, honestly not a terrible concept and this still ends up being way better than at least one of those films anyway. Decently immersive, brisk, and engaging for the dirt cheap prices you can find this for even if it never fully sells itself on its premise. On the one hand I appreciate that this never (bar one sole time) jumps the gun by throwing in cheap jump scares before the buildup has set in (a rarity with these things) but that buildup just lasts too damn long, no excuses. Super well put together but it needed a lot less (or at least more fleshed-out) docu-stuff with that crushingly blandass lead (who conveniently is the only less-than-perfect performance in a film chock full of expert ones [particularly Chelsea Lopez, who gives a tour de force one]) and more eerie found footage stuff with the teens. Eventually turns into exactly what you'd expect. Far from that bad, but still a shame.
LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Independence Day (1996) in Movies
Sep 20, 2020
Okay but why do you all call this a legendary blockbuster spectacle when there's very little spectacle yet a whole lot of people sulking around in rooms talking about computer code, cigars, recycling, and little else of actual value? Honestly just bar that this is preposterous and nauseatingly corny with a twinge of jingoism (granted, still way less than I expected) and a metric fuckton of characters not the least bit interesting - because of course it is, this is a Roland Emmerich film. Hell, this is the nearly tit-for-tat way less fun precursor to 2012 as it stands. But Jesus Christ did it have to be so goddamn boring? Not even ten minutes into this weightless behemoth and I already wanted the aliens (who, by the way, are barely even used... in this ALIEN movie) to put all these annoying mfs out of their misery. Has some highlights: the whole alien surgery bit is still a winner, can't help but get a sincere chuckle out of the last scene with Randy Quaid, and of course the explosions are... explosive. But it isn't worth it to have to wait like 40+ bloated minutes of nothing between them just to get to some minor diversions. Yes the effects are nice but when do we get to sit back and admire them around all this insufferable exposition and cheese? Hirsch > Smith > Fox > Spiner > Goldblum > Quaid > the kid actors > everyone else > dog shit > Pullman.
Ben 10 OmniJogos
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Prepare to go galactic in the biggest Duck Life adventure ever! It is a peaceful day on Earth. You...
Lightning Fighter
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On Sale for a limited time!! $1.99 -> $0.99 "Lightning Fighter is certainly no slouch as far as...
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BankofMarquis (1832 KP) rated The Predator (2018) in Movies
Sep 26, 2018
Waste of idea, talent and my time
If I was to show future generations a prototypical 1980's "Machismo, Blood and Guts Action Flick", I would pull the original 1987 PREDATOR (starring good ol' Arnold Schwarzenegger) off my dusty shelves and show this to them. It is a film so "of it's time".
In subsequent years, there have been more films that attempted to use the Predator character - PREDATOR 2 (1990), AVP: ALIENS VS. PREDATOR (2004), ALIENS VS. PREDATOR: REQUIEM (2007) and PREDATORS (2010) - all disappointing. All failing to equal the balance of machismo, action and humor that is needed.
So...it was with great anticipation that I looked forward to THE PREDATOR, a new film written and directed by Shane Black (KISS KISS BANG BANG, IRON MAN 3, THE NICE GUYS) - one of the actors in the 1987 flick!
And...I was disappointed again.
This film fails because it never really got a grip on just what type of film it wanted to be - is it a Sci-Fi film? Is it an Action film? A buddy flick? A gore fest? A look at Autism? Black's script and direction spreads all these items out on the picnic blanket that is this film and then intermittently picks each one of these up to show us - sometimes a couple of them - like a kid trying to decide whether he wants the chips or the hot dogs or the Oreo cookies and just shoves them all in his mouth together.
And that's too bad, for Black has an interesting premise - rival Predators battling on Earth - with a ragtag group of Earthlings thrown in the middle - and what a "ragtag" group they are! Trevante Rhodes (MOONLIGHTING), Thomas Jane (THE MIST), Keegan-Michael Key (KEY & PEELE), Alfie Allen (GAME OF THRONES) and Augusto Aguilera (CHASING LIFE) make an intriguing band of misfit soldiers that easily could have been an equal to Arnold's ragtag group of soldiers from the 1987 original.
Unfortunately, they are the "back-up band" to the boring Boyd Holbrook (NARCOS) and Olivia Munn (X-MEN: APOCALYPSE) as a couple thrown together to defend Holbrook's Autistic son (Jacob Tremblay - so good in ROOM and wasted here) in a by-the-book "they hate each other when they first meet, so - naturally - they'll fall in love by the end" plot contrivance that doesn't work at all.
Add on top of that Sterling K. Brown (THIS IS US) as a "mysterious" Gov't Agent who is so much of a bad guy, all he was missing was a mustache twirl and the missed opportunities of actors such as Yvonne Stahovski (THE HANDMAID'S TALE) and NIall Matter (EUREKA) who both just stand around and do nothing. They even cast Jake Busey (Gary's kid) - who would be the perfect "over-the-top" bad guy for this sort of film, but...he is just misdirection and wasted as well.
What a wasted effort, a wasted opportunity and a waste of my time.
Letter Grade C_+: The ragtag group of soldiers were at least fun to watch (give Thomas Jane and Keegan-Michael Key their own "buddy" picture)!
5 stars (out of 10) - and you can take that to the BankofMarquis
In subsequent years, there have been more films that attempted to use the Predator character - PREDATOR 2 (1990), AVP: ALIENS VS. PREDATOR (2004), ALIENS VS. PREDATOR: REQUIEM (2007) and PREDATORS (2010) - all disappointing. All failing to equal the balance of machismo, action and humor that is needed.
So...it was with great anticipation that I looked forward to THE PREDATOR, a new film written and directed by Shane Black (KISS KISS BANG BANG, IRON MAN 3, THE NICE GUYS) - one of the actors in the 1987 flick!
And...I was disappointed again.
This film fails because it never really got a grip on just what type of film it wanted to be - is it a Sci-Fi film? Is it an Action film? A buddy flick? A gore fest? A look at Autism? Black's script and direction spreads all these items out on the picnic blanket that is this film and then intermittently picks each one of these up to show us - sometimes a couple of them - like a kid trying to decide whether he wants the chips or the hot dogs or the Oreo cookies and just shoves them all in his mouth together.
And that's too bad, for Black has an interesting premise - rival Predators battling on Earth - with a ragtag group of Earthlings thrown in the middle - and what a "ragtag" group they are! Trevante Rhodes (MOONLIGHTING), Thomas Jane (THE MIST), Keegan-Michael Key (KEY & PEELE), Alfie Allen (GAME OF THRONES) and Augusto Aguilera (CHASING LIFE) make an intriguing band of misfit soldiers that easily could have been an equal to Arnold's ragtag group of soldiers from the 1987 original.
Unfortunately, they are the "back-up band" to the boring Boyd Holbrook (NARCOS) and Olivia Munn (X-MEN: APOCALYPSE) as a couple thrown together to defend Holbrook's Autistic son (Jacob Tremblay - so good in ROOM and wasted here) in a by-the-book "they hate each other when they first meet, so - naturally - they'll fall in love by the end" plot contrivance that doesn't work at all.
Add on top of that Sterling K. Brown (THIS IS US) as a "mysterious" Gov't Agent who is so much of a bad guy, all he was missing was a mustache twirl and the missed opportunities of actors such as Yvonne Stahovski (THE HANDMAID'S TALE) and NIall Matter (EUREKA) who both just stand around and do nothing. They even cast Jake Busey (Gary's kid) - who would be the perfect "over-the-top" bad guy for this sort of film, but...he is just misdirection and wasted as well.
What a wasted effort, a wasted opportunity and a waste of my time.
Letter Grade C_+: The ragtag group of soldiers were at least fun to watch (give Thomas Jane and Keegan-Michael Key their own "buddy" picture)!
5 stars (out of 10) - and you can take that to the BankofMarquis
Darren (1599 KP) rated AVP - Alien Vs. Predator (2004) in Movies
Jun 20, 2019
Story: AVP: Alien vs. Predator starts by taking us around the world fron Antarctica to space to Nebraska to Nepal where we meet the mountain climbing expert Alexa Woods (Lathan) onto Mexico where we meet the archaeologist Sebastian (Bova) who both get a visit from Maxwell Stafford (Salmon) who represents Charles Bishop Weyland (Henriksen).
Weyland has discovered an ancient pyramid buried under the ice of Bouvetoya Island in Antarctica and has built a team including Alexa, Sebastian, Miller (Bremner), Mark (Flanagan), Joe (Rye) and Adele (Boulaye) to mention a few. To travel to the island to enter into the pyramid for what could well be a massive discovery for whoever finds it.
What starts out as a simple exhibition turns into a nightmare when above ground the men get attacked by Predators but inside the pyramid they must battle aliens in a battle for survival stuck in the middle of these iconic villains.
Thoughts on AVP: Alien vs. Predator
Characters/Performance – Alexa Woods is the expert climber hired to lead the team into the pyramid using her experience on climb ice surfaces, she reluctantly agrees knowing she is the only available person to do the job safely. Sebastian is the archaeologist that is an expert on many ancient cultures. Weyland is the man funding and seeking technology inside the pyramid. The rest of the characters get a proper introduction only to be killed off in about a ten-minute sequence.
Performance was Lathan is good and the highlight of the human characters with everyone else just coming off fine not getting the time to make an impact.
Story – When you look at this story you are left thinking this is Alien on Earth, just without any suspense, horror or interesting stuff going on. This sounds harsh because this is an easy watch and people are going to be happy to watch aliens and predators fight, the problem I have was the introducing us to countless humans only to be disposable for these villains. Certain elements of the story telling do work though, looking at the idea of ancient civilizations worshiping the predators in exchange for the pyramids I did like.
Action/Horror/Sci-Fi – The action is all what you would come to expect, large body counts and alien or predator kills we have seen before. The horror is almost gone which disappoints with the sci-fi edge working on the level it needs to only.
Settings – After taking us around the world in the opening sequences we do settle down nicely for the setting inside the pyramid under the ice with little escape.
Special Effects – We have good effects when we keep things small scale but bad effects when things get to the large scale.
Final Thoughts – This is just fine nothing more, it is an easy watch and brings together icons of film, but this just isn’t as fun as Freddy v Jason.
Overall: Easy to watch all actioner horrorless movie.
https://moviesreview101.com/2017/11/18/franchise-weekend-avp-alien-vs-predator-2004/
Weyland has discovered an ancient pyramid buried under the ice of Bouvetoya Island in Antarctica and has built a team including Alexa, Sebastian, Miller (Bremner), Mark (Flanagan), Joe (Rye) and Adele (Boulaye) to mention a few. To travel to the island to enter into the pyramid for what could well be a massive discovery for whoever finds it.
What starts out as a simple exhibition turns into a nightmare when above ground the men get attacked by Predators but inside the pyramid they must battle aliens in a battle for survival stuck in the middle of these iconic villains.
Thoughts on AVP: Alien vs. Predator
Characters/Performance – Alexa Woods is the expert climber hired to lead the team into the pyramid using her experience on climb ice surfaces, she reluctantly agrees knowing she is the only available person to do the job safely. Sebastian is the archaeologist that is an expert on many ancient cultures. Weyland is the man funding and seeking technology inside the pyramid. The rest of the characters get a proper introduction only to be killed off in about a ten-minute sequence.
Performance was Lathan is good and the highlight of the human characters with everyone else just coming off fine not getting the time to make an impact.
Story – When you look at this story you are left thinking this is Alien on Earth, just without any suspense, horror or interesting stuff going on. This sounds harsh because this is an easy watch and people are going to be happy to watch aliens and predators fight, the problem I have was the introducing us to countless humans only to be disposable for these villains. Certain elements of the story telling do work though, looking at the idea of ancient civilizations worshiping the predators in exchange for the pyramids I did like.
Action/Horror/Sci-Fi – The action is all what you would come to expect, large body counts and alien or predator kills we have seen before. The horror is almost gone which disappoints with the sci-fi edge working on the level it needs to only.
Settings – After taking us around the world in the opening sequences we do settle down nicely for the setting inside the pyramid under the ice with little escape.
Special Effects – We have good effects when we keep things small scale but bad effects when things get to the large scale.
Final Thoughts – This is just fine nothing more, it is an easy watch and brings together icons of film, but this just isn’t as fun as Freddy v Jason.
Overall: Easy to watch all actioner horrorless movie.
https://moviesreview101.com/2017/11/18/franchise-weekend-avp-alien-vs-predator-2004/