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Phillip McSween (751 KP) rated Ninja Assassin (2009) in Movies
Dec 2, 2019
Bland Characters Equals Meh Movie
A former member of a sect of secret ninjas escapes the clan, but has to fight for his life when the past catches up to him.
Acting: 4
I have seen paper bags act better than Rain the actor who plays main character Raizo. I think the screenwriters knew this and tried to mask his lack of chops with less lines, but it definitely didn’t work. He is as bland as the chicken I feed my dog when he has diarrhea. The rest of the crew isn’t terribly better and aren’t worth much of a mention.
Beginning: 10
The movie actually gets off to a great start. It starts off in a gangster hideout and an old man is giving one of the gangsters a tattoo. A letter shows up with black sand in it. Black sand is basically the kiss of death for these ninjas so it’s not too long after that bedlam ensues. Dope scene, got me excited to watch more.
Characters: 2
Cinematography/Visuals: 8
Conflict: 10
The action was also a plus. The beginning is definitely an indicator of things to come. You want crazy martial fighting? Check. Blood and gore? Blamo! Insane slowmo sequences? Coming right up. This is basically an action junkie’s wet dream. Actually, I think I’m giving it too much credit…
Entertainment Value: 7
Memorability: 7
Pace: 7
While I appreciate certain things like at least making an attempt at a backstory, there were other portions that slowed the movie down in a couple of spots. Like seriously, how much training do we need to see this dude do? A few rounds on the good ole speed bag will suffice for me, thanks. Nope, this dude is doing splits, using ninja swords, fighting air. I also thought they spent a bit too much time on the main detective Mika (Naomie Harris) researching the ninjas. Pretty painful, but mostly fine.
Plot: 8
I didn’t hate the story. As I mentioned above, it was cool that you got a look into Raizo’s earlier life in the ninja clan and what got him to where he was. Crappy character, but I appreciated the effort to develop him. While the story got sidetracked here and there, it got you from Point A to Point B fairly smoothly.
Resolution: 6
Overall: 69
What disappoints me most about Ninja Assassin is the sheer amount of potential it had. Because it didn’t invest in quality actors or working in characters we care about, there is little margin for error in the rest of the movie. It wants to be likable, yet it didn’t put in the work to earn your friendship. I do not recommend.
Acting: 4
I have seen paper bags act better than Rain the actor who plays main character Raizo. I think the screenwriters knew this and tried to mask his lack of chops with less lines, but it definitely didn’t work. He is as bland as the chicken I feed my dog when he has diarrhea. The rest of the crew isn’t terribly better and aren’t worth much of a mention.
Beginning: 10
The movie actually gets off to a great start. It starts off in a gangster hideout and an old man is giving one of the gangsters a tattoo. A letter shows up with black sand in it. Black sand is basically the kiss of death for these ninjas so it’s not too long after that bedlam ensues. Dope scene, got me excited to watch more.
Characters: 2
Cinematography/Visuals: 8
Conflict: 10
The action was also a plus. The beginning is definitely an indicator of things to come. You want crazy martial fighting? Check. Blood and gore? Blamo! Insane slowmo sequences? Coming right up. This is basically an action junkie’s wet dream. Actually, I think I’m giving it too much credit…
Entertainment Value: 7
Memorability: 7
Pace: 7
While I appreciate certain things like at least making an attempt at a backstory, there were other portions that slowed the movie down in a couple of spots. Like seriously, how much training do we need to see this dude do? A few rounds on the good ole speed bag will suffice for me, thanks. Nope, this dude is doing splits, using ninja swords, fighting air. I also thought they spent a bit too much time on the main detective Mika (Naomie Harris) researching the ninjas. Pretty painful, but mostly fine.
Plot: 8
I didn’t hate the story. As I mentioned above, it was cool that you got a look into Raizo’s earlier life in the ninja clan and what got him to where he was. Crappy character, but I appreciated the effort to develop him. While the story got sidetracked here and there, it got you from Point A to Point B fairly smoothly.
Resolution: 6
Overall: 69
What disappoints me most about Ninja Assassin is the sheer amount of potential it had. Because it didn’t invest in quality actors or working in characters we care about, there is little margin for error in the rest of the movie. It wants to be likable, yet it didn’t put in the work to earn your friendship. I do not recommend.
Sophia (Bookwyrming Thoughts) (530 KP) rated Boneseeker in Books
Jan 23, 2020
Okay, I have a question: who else, while reading this book (if you did), kept imagining Sherlock Holmes as Benedict Cumberbatch? And I don't even have cable to watch it, nor do I have time to watch Masterpiece Mystery....
<img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_kJ9pDaSzoQ/U2VHyusffEI/AAAAAAAADKw/2xCShmhbaAg/s1600/turnups.gif"; height="153" width="320">
Although imagining THE Sherlock Holmes having a kid is probably impossible. Yet in Boneseeker, it's the next generation of Holmes and Watson, only it's not the legendary duo (wait, they're legendary, right?). Instead of being set in London, the story is mainly set in Philadelphia and New York. Arabella, Sherlock's daughter, and Henry, John Watson's son, are on an expedition to find out if a giant hand found are from a Neanderthal or from Nephilim.
Boneseeker is actually quite scary. Sausage murder? Oh dear. But essentially the book is focused on 4 missing scientists who were on the hunt to prove what the hand really is in said expedition above. I think they were also looking for more giant bones hey, can't give anything away, eh? before they actually vanished into nowhere.
The notes at the end were really helpful. I was planning on doing some of my own research when I had the time, whether at school or at the library, but then I finished reading Boneseeker and saw "AUTHOR'S NOTES." Thus resulting in me going "Fantastic! Less research and Bing crap for me!" Search engines usually just give a) a bunch of crap, b) something entirely different from what you're searching for, or c) "I'm sorry, but that search term doesn't exist. Try again." That's like "Oh, GAME OVER." *plays funky music* I think my mom once said Google told her "Hahaha, you're so funny. What kind of search term is that?" Seems legit mom. I think that's just Option A or B for you.
<img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-MPfbXCfaO6U/U2VIn0kF3WI/AAAAAAAADK4/nihGmv8QglM/s1600/seemslegit.gif"; height="180" width="320">
What's disappointing? Sherlock doesn't make much an appearance, to the dismay of Sherlock fans, unless you're just a fan of John Watson. He makes quite the appearance for the majority of the book. Oh, and it's a stand alone. *sigh* I was so hoping for a sequel. On the bright side, no waiting! Isn't that great, with so many series of books popping up by the day?
<img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_4sSv6F_1eg/U2VJFOLi7qI/AAAAAAAADLE/I9G2jTU62xc/s1600/too-many-people.gif"; height="156" width="320">
Despite the fact Sherlock doesn't make a huge appearance, mystery fans will find this an enjoyable reads. Oh, and maybe for those who enjoy reading about blood and gore...
EDIT: I stand corrected. This is NOT a stand alone (according to author)
------------------
Advance review copy provided by publisher
Original Rating: 4.5
Original Review posted on <a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2014/06/arc-review-boneseeker-by-brynn-chapman.html">Bookwyrming Thoughts
<a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Gi5Rk5yLloA/UtliaUbdL3I/AAAAAAAACbE/J27z92_qrYU/s1600/Official+Banner.png"; /></a>
<img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_kJ9pDaSzoQ/U2VHyusffEI/AAAAAAAADKw/2xCShmhbaAg/s1600/turnups.gif"; height="153" width="320">
Although imagining THE Sherlock Holmes having a kid is probably impossible. Yet in Boneseeker, it's the next generation of Holmes and Watson, only it's not the legendary duo (wait, they're legendary, right?). Instead of being set in London, the story is mainly set in Philadelphia and New York. Arabella, Sherlock's daughter, and Henry, John Watson's son, are on an expedition to find out if a giant hand found are from a Neanderthal or from Nephilim.
Boneseeker is actually quite scary. Sausage murder? Oh dear. But essentially the book is focused on 4 missing scientists who were on the hunt to prove what the hand really is in said expedition above. I think they were also looking for more giant bones hey, can't give anything away, eh? before they actually vanished into nowhere.
The notes at the end were really helpful. I was planning on doing some of my own research when I had the time, whether at school or at the library, but then I finished reading Boneseeker and saw "AUTHOR'S NOTES." Thus resulting in me going "Fantastic! Less research and Bing crap for me!" Search engines usually just give a) a bunch of crap, b) something entirely different from what you're searching for, or c) "I'm sorry, but that search term doesn't exist. Try again." That's like "Oh, GAME OVER." *plays funky music* I think my mom once said Google told her "Hahaha, you're so funny. What kind of search term is that?" Seems legit mom. I think that's just Option A or B for you.
<img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-MPfbXCfaO6U/U2VIn0kF3WI/AAAAAAAADK4/nihGmv8QglM/s1600/seemslegit.gif"; height="180" width="320">
What's disappointing? Sherlock doesn't make much an appearance, to the dismay of Sherlock fans, unless you're just a fan of John Watson. He makes quite the appearance for the majority of the book. Oh, and it's a stand alone. *sigh* I was so hoping for a sequel. On the bright side, no waiting! Isn't that great, with so many series of books popping up by the day?
<img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_4sSv6F_1eg/U2VJFOLi7qI/AAAAAAAADLE/I9G2jTU62xc/s1600/too-many-people.gif"; height="156" width="320">
Despite the fact Sherlock doesn't make a huge appearance, mystery fans will find this an enjoyable reads. Oh, and maybe for those who enjoy reading about blood and gore...
EDIT: I stand corrected. This is NOT a stand alone (according to author)
------------------
Advance review copy provided by publisher
Original Rating: 4.5
Original Review posted on <a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/2014/06/arc-review-boneseeker-by-brynn-chapman.html">Bookwyrming Thoughts
<a href="http://bookwyrming-thoughts.blogspot.com/"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Gi5Rk5yLloA/UtliaUbdL3I/AAAAAAAACbE/J27z92_qrYU/s1600/Official+Banner.png"; /></a>
Charlie Cobra Reviews (1840 KP) rated The Order in TV
Jul 6, 2020 (Updated Jul 6, 2020)
Don't Call Them Witches - 7/10
The Order is a 2019 supernatural horror/drama tv series created by Dennis Heaton and a team of writers including: Dennis Heaton, Shelley Eriksen, Rachel Langer, Jennica Harper, Penny Gummerson and Jason Filiatrault. The show was produced by Nomadic Pictures with producers Petros Danabassis, Jay Daniel Beechinor, and Morris Chapdelaine and released on Netflix in March. The shows stars Jake Manley, Sarah Grey, Matt Frewer, and Max Martini.
Thrust into a world of magic and monsters (werewolves), Jack Morten (Jake Manley) must pledge himself to a secret society so that he can avenge the death of his mother by their leader, Edward Coventry (Max Martini). His only family is his grandfather, "Pops" (Matt Frewer), the genius behind their plan for him to infiltrate the order and learn what he can to bring them down from the inside. Things go from bad to worse as he uncovers The Hermetic Order of the Blue Rose are practitioners of magic and someone or something is killing their pledges on campus. And more complications arise as he becomes enamoured with a higher ranking member Alyssa Drake (Sarah Grey) and a group of Knights whose mission is to stop evil magic users.
The Order is a decent show. I liked it alot but it was hard for me to get behind. It definitely has a lot of flaws and I can see a lot of people (like critics) tearing this show apart. That being said, I can't believe it has 100% on rotten tomatoes at this point or that it has been renewed for a second season. It was pretty slow building to me especially because I thought it was only going to be a secret society type show like the movie The Skulls but with a werewolf angle to it. I was very surprised when it was more about a magic secret society and later had a werewolf element to it. What I really didn't care for so much was the love theme to it that made me want to compare it to Twilight. You'll know what I'm talking about if you give it a chance. I really wanted to give this show a 6. There was a lot to hate in this show but it did get better towards the end. One thing the dialogue was full of cussing, which I didn't mind at all but it felt very amateurish. It made me laugh a lot but it also made me feel like the writers were in high school still. And I believe it's the main reason for the TV-MA rating. Which is another complaint I had. I don't think that for a rated TV-MA show, particularly a horror one, did they have enough violence, blood or gore. It felt very watered down to me in those respects. To me it seems like it was a cool idea, they had good actors who suffered from poor script and dialogue with a decent enough plot but a director(s) who were going for more of a Twilight vibe. As it gets farther into it did get better but barely got a 7 from me. As I write this I'm still contemplating whether to change my rating. It did do somethings quite well. They didn't mess up on the werewolves and even did them in a unique way and I appreciated the world building and
lore that they brought to them. Even the way they portrayed magic in the series was well done. I also generally liked the second half of the seasons' story arc and plot. I give this show a 7/10. I don't recommend it to anyone unless you were a big fan of the Twilight films or if you are just someone who watches anything with magic or werewolves.
Thrust into a world of magic and monsters (werewolves), Jack Morten (Jake Manley) must pledge himself to a secret society so that he can avenge the death of his mother by their leader, Edward Coventry (Max Martini). His only family is his grandfather, "Pops" (Matt Frewer), the genius behind their plan for him to infiltrate the order and learn what he can to bring them down from the inside. Things go from bad to worse as he uncovers The Hermetic Order of the Blue Rose are practitioners of magic and someone or something is killing their pledges on campus. And more complications arise as he becomes enamoured with a higher ranking member Alyssa Drake (Sarah Grey) and a group of Knights whose mission is to stop evil magic users.
The Order is a decent show. I liked it alot but it was hard for me to get behind. It definitely has a lot of flaws and I can see a lot of people (like critics) tearing this show apart. That being said, I can't believe it has 100% on rotten tomatoes at this point or that it has been renewed for a second season. It was pretty slow building to me especially because I thought it was only going to be a secret society type show like the movie The Skulls but with a werewolf angle to it. I was very surprised when it was more about a magic secret society and later had a werewolf element to it. What I really didn't care for so much was the love theme to it that made me want to compare it to Twilight. You'll know what I'm talking about if you give it a chance. I really wanted to give this show a 6. There was a lot to hate in this show but it did get better towards the end. One thing the dialogue was full of cussing, which I didn't mind at all but it felt very amateurish. It made me laugh a lot but it also made me feel like the writers were in high school still. And I believe it's the main reason for the TV-MA rating. Which is another complaint I had. I don't think that for a rated TV-MA show, particularly a horror one, did they have enough violence, blood or gore. It felt very watered down to me in those respects. To me it seems like it was a cool idea, they had good actors who suffered from poor script and dialogue with a decent enough plot but a director(s) who were going for more of a Twilight vibe. As it gets farther into it did get better but barely got a 7 from me. As I write this I'm still contemplating whether to change my rating. It did do somethings quite well. They didn't mess up on the werewolves and even did them in a unique way and I appreciated the world building and
lore that they brought to them. Even the way they portrayed magic in the series was well done. I also generally liked the second half of the seasons' story arc and plot. I give this show a 7/10. I don't recommend it to anyone unless you were a big fan of the Twilight films or if you are just someone who watches anything with magic or werewolves.
kitty ♡ (68 KP) rated 13 Reasons Why in TV
Jan 9, 2018 (Updated Jan 9, 2018)
there are only 13 episodes (1 more)
we get to see part of the aftermath of the tapes
they changed the way hannah kills herself (3 more)
it felt too mainstream
i didn't feel the same watching it as i did when i read the book
that *particular* scene made me want to vomit
something just didn't click.
Contains spoilers, click to show
I would add the whole "suicide glamorization" factor as a negative, but that's something to be taken up with the author of the novel, Jay Asher, and not the television series. I'll talk about that when I review the book after I finish re-reading it.
TRIGGER WARNING: I will be talking about suicide here, which should be no surprise as this is a show about suicide, but I will be doing so in semi-detail.
The main bone I have to pick with this portrayal of 13 Reasons Why is that they changed the way Hannah kills herself. In the book, Hannah Baker kills herself by swallowing a handful of pills. And as the book is limited to Clay's point of view, Asher doesn't describe it in greater detail. If I can recall, he just leaves it as that (but feel free to correct me if I'm wrong!) In the series, however, Hannah kills herself by bleeding out in the bathtub. Instead of showing her swallowing pills, the writers decided that having the girl slit her wrists would be a better option which is WRONG. They really wanted those bonus points for gore, huh? The fact that they made her death more gruesome than it already is, is simply just disgusting, in my opinion.
Actually, the fact that they even showed her death scene at all is just disgusting. Not only is it so, but it may also be triggering for some people. They shouldn't have done it in such detail. What they could've done was they could've shown the blade (if she were still going to bleed out) and a little bit of blood to allude to the fact that she died this way. But no, they just had to show the whole process, which can easily turn into a how-to for viewers in a bad place.
Really, the only good thing I have to add about this is the fact that they show Tony giving Hannah's parents a copy of her tapes, and by the looks of it, the tapes may be handed to the police, which means Bryce's nasty ass can get what he deserves. Hopefully. But we really don't need a part 2. Sorry about it.
TRIGGER WARNING: I will be talking about suicide here, which should be no surprise as this is a show about suicide, but I will be doing so in semi-detail.
The main bone I have to pick with this portrayal of 13 Reasons Why is that they changed the way Hannah kills herself. In the book, Hannah Baker kills herself by swallowing a handful of pills. And as the book is limited to Clay's point of view, Asher doesn't describe it in greater detail. If I can recall, he just leaves it as that (but feel free to correct me if I'm wrong!) In the series, however, Hannah kills herself by bleeding out in the bathtub. Instead of showing her swallowing pills, the writers decided that having the girl slit her wrists would be a better option which is WRONG. They really wanted those bonus points for gore, huh? The fact that they made her death more gruesome than it already is, is simply just disgusting, in my opinion.
Actually, the fact that they even showed her death scene at all is just disgusting. Not only is it so, but it may also be triggering for some people. They shouldn't have done it in such detail. What they could've done was they could've shown the blade (if she were still going to bleed out) and a little bit of blood to allude to the fact that she died this way. But no, they just had to show the whole process, which can easily turn into a how-to for viewers in a bad place.
Really, the only good thing I have to add about this is the fact that they show Tony giving Hannah's parents a copy of her tapes, and by the looks of it, the tapes may be handed to the police, which means Bryce's nasty ass can get what he deserves. Hopefully. But we really don't need a part 2. Sorry about it.
Chris Sawin (602 KP) rated Dance of the Dead (2008) in Movies
Jun 18, 2019
Jimmy Dunn (Jared Kusnitz) never seems to take anything seriously. He likes to spend more time in detention than he does in class. So it’s no surprise that Lindsey (Greyson Chadwick), the girl Jimmy was going to take to prom, decides to not go with him after realizing that Jimmy has no ambition. To make matters worse, something weird is going on in the graveyard next to the nuclear power plant in town. The dead are walking and they’re headed to the prom. The town is now in the hands of the losers who couldn’t get dates to the prom. There goes the neighborhood and here comes the pain; that is something that is certainly meant in more ways than one.
This is the type of horror film you have the urge to turn off as soon as it starts. Written by Joe Ballarini (My Little Pony: The Movie) and directed by Gregg Bishop (the “Dante the Great” segment of V/H/S Viral), Dance of the Dead is a part of the eight films that made up Ghost House Underground; horror films from all over the world chosen by Sam Raimi and Rob Tapert supposedly representing a “fresh” perspective of the horror genre. The problem is that most people would seek out one of these films and then never bother with the rest because why would you torture yourself any further?
The first 20 or so minutes of the film revolve around high school melodrama and the prom. This is supposedly where you get accustomed to the film’s humor, but it’s mostly nothing more than high school kids being obnoxious and unbearable. The graveyard scene is where things get even worse. Zombies start rising from beyond the grave and decomposing hands start bursting through headstones since that makes more sense than soil. Emerging from the ground simply wasn’t enough either; these zombies explode from their graves with smoke and a loud crash. Moments later during the same sequence, there are zombies jumping several feet into the air out of the ground, landing on their feet, and running after these kids. If it sounds cool in the slightest, then this description isn’t doing this dumpster fire justice.
The zombies are all over the place in Dance of the Dead. They start off as the zombies that run similar to the zombies in Zack Snyder’s Dawn of the Dead remake. Later on in the film, they stumble around and are slow like George Romero’s zombies. Even later after that, the zombies are running again while some attempt to speak, say, “Brains!” and then get in a car and drive off. Someone had pointed out that the zombies in the film who are fresh out of the ground run while older ones move slower, which only makes this turd milkshake slightly less nutty. Dance of the Dead also can’t decide what zombie films to pay homage to either. Return of the Living Dead has a massive influence, but the film clearly pays tribute to Night of the Living Dead when the kids reach a house and decide to board up all the windows and take shelter. It seems like the one consistent aspect this film has is to be inconsistent.
Did you know zombies can be held at bay solely by the power of rocking out? Three stoners in a band (a guitarist, a bassist, and a drummer) inadvertently discover that their music stops zombies in their tracks. A bit later in the film during the prom, the gymnasium is full of zombies. There’s music playing and it shows three zombies on stage playing musical instruments; a guitar, a bass, and a drum set. Fast forward a little more and the three stoners are back again playing their stoner rock and the zombies are back to being frozen during their performance. There’s no consistency when it comes to what they play or how it affects zombies.
“In extreme circumstances, the assailants can be stopped by removing the head or destroying the brain.” Do you remember this quote from Shaun of the Dead? Try to keep it in mind, especially the, “removing the head,” part. A guy gets his head torn off by a zombie and you’d think he’d be dead, but this actually turns his decapitated head into a zombie. He comes back later on; his headless corpse carrying his decapitated head around. It’s one thing to try and reinvent a genre, but when you have so many reinventions along with homage out to wazoo you’re basically throwing cow pies at a brick wall and seeing what sticks.
Zombies shouldn’t make out with each other. Vampires shouldn’t sparkle and Warm Bodies isn’t canon. Two students turn into zombies and still end up in a giant make out session after they’ve turned. The kiss turns awkward as they start chewing on each other mid-kiss. They start taking bites out of each other while they’re still sucking face. This is the scariest aspect of the film considering that maybe most of us don’t want our eyeballs chewed out of our skulls during something so intimate.
When the special effects aren’t being a complete eyesore from being so cheap and ugly, the gore in Dance of the Dead is decent. Blood splattering everywhere is pretty common throughout the film. The acting isn’t completely terrible either. It absolutely isn’t good by any means. Dance of the Dead is basically Degrassi with zombies and everything lame you’re expecting to tag along with that reference. Lucas Till (X-Men: First Class, MacGyver) has a brief cameo as one of the rockers in the film and he's probably the only cast member you'll recognize.
The jumbled mass of homage and redefining of zombie lore in Dance of the Dead throws a monkey wrench in calling the film stereotypical and cliché, but it certainly feels that way. It seems like a rejected, alternate, first draft of a film you’ve already seen rather than a film that attempts to stand on its own two legs. It may be fun for fans of campy horror films, but its originality is borderline offensive since Dance of the Dead seems to just combine everything you know about zombies or purposely does the opposite at an attempt at being a different chomp of undead horror. Unfortunately though, Dance of the Dead is too overwhelmingly absurd for its own good as its gore feels like the drunken antics of a washed up clown rather than a competent horror film.
Dance of the Dead is available to stream on Amazon Prime, YouTube, and Google Play for $1.99, Vudu for $2.99, and iTunes for $5.99. The DVD is $7.72 on Amazon while the Blu-ray (which is Region 2 only) is $25.52 from a third party seller. The DVD is $7.49 in new condition and with free shipping on eBay or $4 with $2.99 shipping pre-owned. If you enjoy terrible things, the eight disc set of all the Ghost House Underground titles are available as a boxed set on Amazon for $179.74 and on eBay for $39.99 in brand new condition and with free shipping.
This is the type of horror film you have the urge to turn off as soon as it starts. Written by Joe Ballarini (My Little Pony: The Movie) and directed by Gregg Bishop (the “Dante the Great” segment of V/H/S Viral), Dance of the Dead is a part of the eight films that made up Ghost House Underground; horror films from all over the world chosen by Sam Raimi and Rob Tapert supposedly representing a “fresh” perspective of the horror genre. The problem is that most people would seek out one of these films and then never bother with the rest because why would you torture yourself any further?
The first 20 or so minutes of the film revolve around high school melodrama and the prom. This is supposedly where you get accustomed to the film’s humor, but it’s mostly nothing more than high school kids being obnoxious and unbearable. The graveyard scene is where things get even worse. Zombies start rising from beyond the grave and decomposing hands start bursting through headstones since that makes more sense than soil. Emerging from the ground simply wasn’t enough either; these zombies explode from their graves with smoke and a loud crash. Moments later during the same sequence, there are zombies jumping several feet into the air out of the ground, landing on their feet, and running after these kids. If it sounds cool in the slightest, then this description isn’t doing this dumpster fire justice.
The zombies are all over the place in Dance of the Dead. They start off as the zombies that run similar to the zombies in Zack Snyder’s Dawn of the Dead remake. Later on in the film, they stumble around and are slow like George Romero’s zombies. Even later after that, the zombies are running again while some attempt to speak, say, “Brains!” and then get in a car and drive off. Someone had pointed out that the zombies in the film who are fresh out of the ground run while older ones move slower, which only makes this turd milkshake slightly less nutty. Dance of the Dead also can’t decide what zombie films to pay homage to either. Return of the Living Dead has a massive influence, but the film clearly pays tribute to Night of the Living Dead when the kids reach a house and decide to board up all the windows and take shelter. It seems like the one consistent aspect this film has is to be inconsistent.
Did you know zombies can be held at bay solely by the power of rocking out? Three stoners in a band (a guitarist, a bassist, and a drummer) inadvertently discover that their music stops zombies in their tracks. A bit later in the film during the prom, the gymnasium is full of zombies. There’s music playing and it shows three zombies on stage playing musical instruments; a guitar, a bass, and a drum set. Fast forward a little more and the three stoners are back again playing their stoner rock and the zombies are back to being frozen during their performance. There’s no consistency when it comes to what they play or how it affects zombies.
“In extreme circumstances, the assailants can be stopped by removing the head or destroying the brain.” Do you remember this quote from Shaun of the Dead? Try to keep it in mind, especially the, “removing the head,” part. A guy gets his head torn off by a zombie and you’d think he’d be dead, but this actually turns his decapitated head into a zombie. He comes back later on; his headless corpse carrying his decapitated head around. It’s one thing to try and reinvent a genre, but when you have so many reinventions along with homage out to wazoo you’re basically throwing cow pies at a brick wall and seeing what sticks.
Zombies shouldn’t make out with each other. Vampires shouldn’t sparkle and Warm Bodies isn’t canon. Two students turn into zombies and still end up in a giant make out session after they’ve turned. The kiss turns awkward as they start chewing on each other mid-kiss. They start taking bites out of each other while they’re still sucking face. This is the scariest aspect of the film considering that maybe most of us don’t want our eyeballs chewed out of our skulls during something so intimate.
When the special effects aren’t being a complete eyesore from being so cheap and ugly, the gore in Dance of the Dead is decent. Blood splattering everywhere is pretty common throughout the film. The acting isn’t completely terrible either. It absolutely isn’t good by any means. Dance of the Dead is basically Degrassi with zombies and everything lame you’re expecting to tag along with that reference. Lucas Till (X-Men: First Class, MacGyver) has a brief cameo as one of the rockers in the film and he's probably the only cast member you'll recognize.
The jumbled mass of homage and redefining of zombie lore in Dance of the Dead throws a monkey wrench in calling the film stereotypical and cliché, but it certainly feels that way. It seems like a rejected, alternate, first draft of a film you’ve already seen rather than a film that attempts to stand on its own two legs. It may be fun for fans of campy horror films, but its originality is borderline offensive since Dance of the Dead seems to just combine everything you know about zombies or purposely does the opposite at an attempt at being a different chomp of undead horror. Unfortunately though, Dance of the Dead is too overwhelmingly absurd for its own good as its gore feels like the drunken antics of a washed up clown rather than a competent horror film.
Dance of the Dead is available to stream on Amazon Prime, YouTube, and Google Play for $1.99, Vudu for $2.99, and iTunes for $5.99. The DVD is $7.72 on Amazon while the Blu-ray (which is Region 2 only) is $25.52 from a third party seller. The DVD is $7.49 in new condition and with free shipping on eBay or $4 with $2.99 shipping pre-owned. If you enjoy terrible things, the eight disc set of all the Ghost House Underground titles are available as a boxed set on Amazon for $179.74 and on eBay for $39.99 in brand new condition and with free shipping.
Kirk Bage (1775 KP) rated Midsommar (2019) in Movies
Jan 22, 2021
In 2017 the stale market of “horror” thrillers got a royal shake-up when Jordan Peele made Get Out. All of a sudden it seemed possible again to use the tired genre, that had been relying on gore and jump shocks alone for at least two decades, as a palette for intelligent social commentary and some seriously artistic flourishes. The following year, Ari Aster came out of nowhere with a debut feature that impressed everyone for it’s originality and bravado in this new “art-horror” model – the devisive yet always interesting Hereditary, a film that confused me on first watch, but gave me faith that I could be unnerved again, it’s secret being that you couldn’t compare it to anything since the golden days of the 70s.
So, when I saw the trailer for Midsommar in 2019 and realised it was the same director, it went straight to the top of my must see list. Add to the appeal the significant lure of the lead actress and main character, the extremely promising Florence Pugh, who blew me away for her raw ability in Lady Macbeth, and beguiled me even more in every minute of Chan-Wook Park’s superlative espionage mini-series The Little Drummer Girl, and I knew this was something I didn’t want to miss. Sometimes it only takes two projects on a CV to elevate a future star from obscurity to A-list potential. In Pugh I had already seen enough range, charisma and depth to suspect she was one of those special few. By the end of Midsommar I was convinced of it!
Plot wise, all you need to know going in cold is that Dani (Pugh) racked with grief following early scenes is dragged to Sweden to participate in the Midsommar celebrations of a small isolated community, as her relationship with boyfriend Christian is very much on the rocks and she is in need of some catharsis and release. At first the Idyllic setting, bathed in sunlight you can almost feel, seems refreshing and clean. The whites, yellows and blues of the images are so crisp you can imagine every smell and texture, and you find yourself smiling, despite the fact a creeping unease and sinister secret is already infiltrating the calm in wonderfully subtle ways.
Needless to say it goes to some very dark and strange places. So much so I gasped out loud twice and stood up from my seat involuntarily on one particularly disturbing moment. To try and explain how that unfolds and comes to be is both impossible and would need some big time spoilers, so I won’t do that. It’s enough to say that where you are emotionally at the end of this filmic experience is very, very far from where you started. Much in the same way as Hereditary, you feel you have been dragged by the hair on a very uncomfortable journey that is both strangely unsatisfying, confusing and upsetting; you can’t say you “liked” either film as much as admitting you can’t stop thinking about them and need to see them again to absorb the detail, if indeed you can bear that.
As of writing this I haven’t gone back and watched this again – I’m genuinely wary of putting myself through it a second time! But, I have gone back to Hereditary and appreciated it much more knowing the ending already, and seeing the detail that is there from the beginning, that makes it all make sense in a way it doesn’t first time around. Midsommar, I sense, is the same, in that there has been so much attention to the build up and background that you will see and hear relevant clues to the mystery much more the more times you watch it. What they are wearing, images on walls and seemingly insignificant things the camera picks up on create a tapestry of loose threads that can be woven together into deeper meaning if that is what you want to do.
Without doing that it may seem like a bewildering entity, deliberately odd for the sake of it, and as such it could put anyone off. At 2 hours and 28 minutes it is a bit of a stretch, and the last half hour, once it descends into the complete madness suggested earlier, perhaps doesn’t live up to the promises it makes. Also, despite Pugh being a mesmeric presence from start to finish, the supporting cast can’t quite go with her on the same level. Even the talented Will Poulter seems burdened by a less than three dimensional character, underwritten as are many in a script that focuses so much on Dani that everything else suffers.
My overall impression of it as a film is that it falls short of greatness by a narrow margin, but comes very close at times to genuine genius. It is the promise of Aster as a filmmaker that excites me most, even if this is not the film it could have been with a little more experience, maturity and, perhaps, budget. It is his Bottle Rocket, or Hard Eight, when you suspect he will have a Grand Budapest Hotel, or a There Will Be Blood in him at some point down the line.
In conclusion, I can’t emphasise enough how much I was drawn to every moment of what Florence Pugh was doing. Be wary of the film if a casual viewing experience is what you want, because it may infuriate you, and compel you even to switch it off, if you are not totally ready to meet it where it wants to take you. But, watch it for Pugh and see what a rare talent she is bringing to cinema into the 2020s. A very exciting prospect indeed.
So, when I saw the trailer for Midsommar in 2019 and realised it was the same director, it went straight to the top of my must see list. Add to the appeal the significant lure of the lead actress and main character, the extremely promising Florence Pugh, who blew me away for her raw ability in Lady Macbeth, and beguiled me even more in every minute of Chan-Wook Park’s superlative espionage mini-series The Little Drummer Girl, and I knew this was something I didn’t want to miss. Sometimes it only takes two projects on a CV to elevate a future star from obscurity to A-list potential. In Pugh I had already seen enough range, charisma and depth to suspect she was one of those special few. By the end of Midsommar I was convinced of it!
Plot wise, all you need to know going in cold is that Dani (Pugh) racked with grief following early scenes is dragged to Sweden to participate in the Midsommar celebrations of a small isolated community, as her relationship with boyfriend Christian is very much on the rocks and she is in need of some catharsis and release. At first the Idyllic setting, bathed in sunlight you can almost feel, seems refreshing and clean. The whites, yellows and blues of the images are so crisp you can imagine every smell and texture, and you find yourself smiling, despite the fact a creeping unease and sinister secret is already infiltrating the calm in wonderfully subtle ways.
Needless to say it goes to some very dark and strange places. So much so I gasped out loud twice and stood up from my seat involuntarily on one particularly disturbing moment. To try and explain how that unfolds and comes to be is both impossible and would need some big time spoilers, so I won’t do that. It’s enough to say that where you are emotionally at the end of this filmic experience is very, very far from where you started. Much in the same way as Hereditary, you feel you have been dragged by the hair on a very uncomfortable journey that is both strangely unsatisfying, confusing and upsetting; you can’t say you “liked” either film as much as admitting you can’t stop thinking about them and need to see them again to absorb the detail, if indeed you can bear that.
As of writing this I haven’t gone back and watched this again – I’m genuinely wary of putting myself through it a second time! But, I have gone back to Hereditary and appreciated it much more knowing the ending already, and seeing the detail that is there from the beginning, that makes it all make sense in a way it doesn’t first time around. Midsommar, I sense, is the same, in that there has been so much attention to the build up and background that you will see and hear relevant clues to the mystery much more the more times you watch it. What they are wearing, images on walls and seemingly insignificant things the camera picks up on create a tapestry of loose threads that can be woven together into deeper meaning if that is what you want to do.
Without doing that it may seem like a bewildering entity, deliberately odd for the sake of it, and as such it could put anyone off. At 2 hours and 28 minutes it is a bit of a stretch, and the last half hour, once it descends into the complete madness suggested earlier, perhaps doesn’t live up to the promises it makes. Also, despite Pugh being a mesmeric presence from start to finish, the supporting cast can’t quite go with her on the same level. Even the talented Will Poulter seems burdened by a less than three dimensional character, underwritten as are many in a script that focuses so much on Dani that everything else suffers.
My overall impression of it as a film is that it falls short of greatness by a narrow margin, but comes very close at times to genuine genius. It is the promise of Aster as a filmmaker that excites me most, even if this is not the film it could have been with a little more experience, maturity and, perhaps, budget. It is his Bottle Rocket, or Hard Eight, when you suspect he will have a Grand Budapest Hotel, or a There Will Be Blood in him at some point down the line.
In conclusion, I can’t emphasise enough how much I was drawn to every moment of what Florence Pugh was doing. Be wary of the film if a casual viewing experience is what you want, because it may infuriate you, and compel you even to switch it off, if you are not totally ready to meet it where it wants to take you. But, watch it for Pugh and see what a rare talent she is bringing to cinema into the 2020s. A very exciting prospect indeed.
Chris Sawin (602 KP) rated The Legend of Hell House (1973) in Movies
Jun 19, 2019
Mr. Rudolph Deutsch has hired Lionel Barrett to investigate a haunted house. This isn't any normal haunted house though. It seems as though anyone who enters the house either leaves the house insane or winds up dead. In addition to Mr Barrett, his wife, Ann Barrett, a mental medium named Florence Tanner, and a physical medium who is also the only survivor of the last team of investigators to visit the house named Benjamin Fischer are all visiting Hell House to try and solve this phenomenon. $100,000 is theirs for the taking if they can do it within a week, but will they be able to survive what's caged inside Hell House? Emeric Belasco, a self-proclaimed genius ahead of his time, may have other plans.
The Legend of Hell House isn't your average horror film about paranormal activity. I'll be up front with you right now, I'm not a big fan of movies about ghosts. I'm just not. I've come across a few that were decent, but I didn't think they were anything special or I just wound up not liking them at all. I actually liked this a lot more than I thought I would. The film isn't heavy on blood, gore, or cheap scares. In fact, more often than not, the scares come from what you don't see rather than what you actually do.
The acting is definitely a strong point in the film. The entire cast has their moments of brilliance during the insanity Hell House is putting them through, but Roddy McDowall is the actor who stands out amonst the rest. His performance just seems to outshine everyone else and he steals just about every scene he's in. There's a scene in the film where he starts screaming and falls to the floor in a seizure like maneuver that reminded me a lot of some of the scenes with Bruce Campbell in Evil Dead. The explanation was that he was blocking himself off from the house since he had been there before. As a physical medium, he was basically putting up walls to defend himself from the house this time around. And in this scene, I guess he tried lowering his guard for a bit and...this happened. The speeches he gives though, his facial expressions and body language, and cold tone. It's weird, but a guy that you look at at the beginning of the film and say to yourself that you're going to hate him because he looks smarmy and only really cares about himself winds up being the highlight of the film.
Another aspect of the film I really enjoyed were the special effects of the film. There's no CGI or anything, but the effects in the film are done very well. There's a scene where Ms. Tanner looks into her bedroom and sees someone lying under the covers in her bed and when she lifts up the covers, you can't see anyone but the door opens and slams like someone was getting up and leaving. It was just done very well. The effects like that were done very well. There are a few that look cheesy(cat in the shower scene, anyone?), but overall they look very good given how old the film is.
The plot was surprising, as well. I wasn't expecting anything really original or anything, but the fact that science is involved so heavily in trying rid the house of its supernatural presence was not only interesting, but a breath of fresh air compared to other methods I would've expected based on other films.
I think it's safe to say that The Legend of Hell House is one of the best haunted house films ever made and the best one I've seen as of this review. It probably isn't the type of horror film for gorehounds or if you're looking for a bloodfest. It's more of a paranormal film with a slight psychological twist. The acting is top notch and the story is a bit more clever than you may give it credit for at first glance.
The Legend of Hell House isn't your average horror film about paranormal activity. I'll be up front with you right now, I'm not a big fan of movies about ghosts. I'm just not. I've come across a few that were decent, but I didn't think they were anything special or I just wound up not liking them at all. I actually liked this a lot more than I thought I would. The film isn't heavy on blood, gore, or cheap scares. In fact, more often than not, the scares come from what you don't see rather than what you actually do.
The acting is definitely a strong point in the film. The entire cast has their moments of brilliance during the insanity Hell House is putting them through, but Roddy McDowall is the actor who stands out amonst the rest. His performance just seems to outshine everyone else and he steals just about every scene he's in. There's a scene in the film where he starts screaming and falls to the floor in a seizure like maneuver that reminded me a lot of some of the scenes with Bruce Campbell in Evil Dead. The explanation was that he was blocking himself off from the house since he had been there before. As a physical medium, he was basically putting up walls to defend himself from the house this time around. And in this scene, I guess he tried lowering his guard for a bit and...this happened. The speeches he gives though, his facial expressions and body language, and cold tone. It's weird, but a guy that you look at at the beginning of the film and say to yourself that you're going to hate him because he looks smarmy and only really cares about himself winds up being the highlight of the film.
Another aspect of the film I really enjoyed were the special effects of the film. There's no CGI or anything, but the effects in the film are done very well. There's a scene where Ms. Tanner looks into her bedroom and sees someone lying under the covers in her bed and when she lifts up the covers, you can't see anyone but the door opens and slams like someone was getting up and leaving. It was just done very well. The effects like that were done very well. There are a few that look cheesy(cat in the shower scene, anyone?), but overall they look very good given how old the film is.
The plot was surprising, as well. I wasn't expecting anything really original or anything, but the fact that science is involved so heavily in trying rid the house of its supernatural presence was not only interesting, but a breath of fresh air compared to other methods I would've expected based on other films.
I think it's safe to say that The Legend of Hell House is one of the best haunted house films ever made and the best one I've seen as of this review. It probably isn't the type of horror film for gorehounds or if you're looking for a bloodfest. It's more of a paranormal film with a slight psychological twist. The acting is top notch and the story is a bit more clever than you may give it credit for at first glance.
Becs (244 KP) rated Beasts of the Frozen Sun in Books
Sep 22, 2019
The plot - so bloody action-packed that leaves you exhausted at times (3 more)
The Villain - makes you want to fall in love with him but then he does something terrible and you want to dismiss him
The enemies to lovers - the MC's are everything
The writing - Jill Criswell does an amazing job with descriptive text and lyrical writing. I was enthralled throughout.
This book is so underrated and it deserves all the hype!
You can also find this review on my blog: bookingwayreads.wordpress.com
TRIGGER WARNINGS: war, violence, blood, gore, talk of sexual assault, child abuse, emotional abuse, animal violence, animal sacrifice, death of an animal, anger issues, arsony, death, murder, talk of drowning, absent parent, death of a parent, disowning, forced marriage, death of a sibling, manipulation, mind control, slavery, starvation, torture, trauma
REVIEW: First off, I want to say to not let all of those trigger warnings deter you from reading this breathtaking novel. Beasts of the Frozen Sun was extremely well-written and I will keep screaming this from the rooftops for as long as I am alive of how amazing this novel is.
Beasts of the Frozen Sun is loaded with badassery and brutally epic scenes. Also, that cover is one of the most beautiful covers I’ve ever seen. There was complexity to the world-building, relatable characters that you just can’t help but fall in love with, brutal wars and men as monstrous as some of the men in the world today. This fantasy novel was defiantly on the darker side, but it D E L I V E R E D ! And it delivered an immersive read that drowned you in the world until the very end.
Beasts of the Frozen Sun follows Lira, the heroine who is gifted from the gods and goddess’. This gift, the ability to read a person’s soul by just touching their chest, was used by others – mainly Lira’s father and uncle. But then a golden-haired giant washes ashore and Lira decides to help him heal. She hides him away and the two of them grow close, forming a bond that is forbidden by both of their clans. But then, the Dragon comes into the story and Lira is left fighting for her life, Reyker’s soul, and her people’s freedom.
Things I loved about Beasts of the Frozen Sun:
1. The main character being a badass heroine who gets angry when her sword is taken from her.
2. The love interest being a tough “bad boy” on the outside, but deep down he’s a big ole softie.
3. Gods/Goddess’ that walk the Earth with humans (even sometimes messing with them)
4. Magical powers that were once used for evil but now are used for good.
5. The whole ‘pretend to be sick so we can get close’ ordeal.
“Looking into his eyes was like gazing at the ocean – swirling shades of deep cobalt and steel gray. Fathomless. Familiar.”
When each of the characters were introduced, I was amazed at how spectacular, unique, and so very strong each of them were! Lira and Reyker’s bond was intense and absolutely addictive. They are literally EVERYTHING. The two are star-crossed lovers but also enemies to lovers and I NEED MORE OF THEM.
The world is out to keep them apart but the two are magnets. And nothing can keep them apart for very long, not even the world no matter how hard it tries too. Reyker is the beast. He was saved from drowning by Lira, who helped him heal by hiding him away. She teaches him her language and she stands by his side. Even when the rest of the world has chewed him up and spit him back out.
Lira battles with being used and caged. She hates feeling like “property” by her father and uncle. She also refuses to believe that Reyker isn’t worth saving. She is one badass heroine and I strive to be her. Smash these two together and you get one powerful couple!
I also want to take a moment to say that Quinlan has my heart and I need to see more of him in book 2 please dear author! I will pay you in my tears and heart if I have too.
“If I die in a cage tomorrow, or I die in a cage in ten years – what is the difference? A cage is not a life.”
The world-building in Beasts of the Frozen Sun was… OMG seriously some of the best I’ve ever read. With history, there is always brutality and this novel does include that. Death, torture, the treatment of woman were all horrible and at times a bit hard to read but Jill Criswell has such raw talent at describing things that she does an amazing job writing those style of scenes. And with this being a story set back in history, those themes are inevitable. But each theme included, made Beasts of the Frozen Sun seem more and more realistic with each passing page.
The plot of this novel is everything!! Wars to villages raids to snuggles between Lira and Reyker. There was never a boring moment within Beasts of the Frozen Sun. It was packed with so much intensity that at times, it left you a bit exhausted. The plot was also dark and brutal but it fit with the story. This was a bloody amazing action-packed novel of magic and redemption, high stakes and brutal fights, powerful woman and monstrous men.
I am on my first ever book hangover. That ending… Jill Criswell is a cruel woman to leave me hanging in the way she did. But OHMAGAWD, I CAN NOT WAIT for book two of this series. Please, if you only ever pick up one book that I recommend, please please please pick this amazing novel up!
“When that dark womb of stillness engulfed him, he embraced it with a flood of relief. Reyker welcomed whatever torments waited him on the other side of this world, knowing it was nothing less than he deserved.”
TRIGGER WARNINGS: war, violence, blood, gore, talk of sexual assault, child abuse, emotional abuse, animal violence, animal sacrifice, death of an animal, anger issues, arsony, death, murder, talk of drowning, absent parent, death of a parent, disowning, forced marriage, death of a sibling, manipulation, mind control, slavery, starvation, torture, trauma
REVIEW: First off, I want to say to not let all of those trigger warnings deter you from reading this breathtaking novel. Beasts of the Frozen Sun was extremely well-written and I will keep screaming this from the rooftops for as long as I am alive of how amazing this novel is.
Beasts of the Frozen Sun is loaded with badassery and brutally epic scenes. Also, that cover is one of the most beautiful covers I’ve ever seen. There was complexity to the world-building, relatable characters that you just can’t help but fall in love with, brutal wars and men as monstrous as some of the men in the world today. This fantasy novel was defiantly on the darker side, but it D E L I V E R E D ! And it delivered an immersive read that drowned you in the world until the very end.
Beasts of the Frozen Sun follows Lira, the heroine who is gifted from the gods and goddess’. This gift, the ability to read a person’s soul by just touching their chest, was used by others – mainly Lira’s father and uncle. But then a golden-haired giant washes ashore and Lira decides to help him heal. She hides him away and the two of them grow close, forming a bond that is forbidden by both of their clans. But then, the Dragon comes into the story and Lira is left fighting for her life, Reyker’s soul, and her people’s freedom.
Things I loved about Beasts of the Frozen Sun:
1. The main character being a badass heroine who gets angry when her sword is taken from her.
2. The love interest being a tough “bad boy” on the outside, but deep down he’s a big ole softie.
3. Gods/Goddess’ that walk the Earth with humans (even sometimes messing with them)
4. Magical powers that were once used for evil but now are used for good.
5. The whole ‘pretend to be sick so we can get close’ ordeal.
“Looking into his eyes was like gazing at the ocean – swirling shades of deep cobalt and steel gray. Fathomless. Familiar.”
When each of the characters were introduced, I was amazed at how spectacular, unique, and so very strong each of them were! Lira and Reyker’s bond was intense and absolutely addictive. They are literally EVERYTHING. The two are star-crossed lovers but also enemies to lovers and I NEED MORE OF THEM.
The world is out to keep them apart but the two are magnets. And nothing can keep them apart for very long, not even the world no matter how hard it tries too. Reyker is the beast. He was saved from drowning by Lira, who helped him heal by hiding him away. She teaches him her language and she stands by his side. Even when the rest of the world has chewed him up and spit him back out.
Lira battles with being used and caged. She hates feeling like “property” by her father and uncle. She also refuses to believe that Reyker isn’t worth saving. She is one badass heroine and I strive to be her. Smash these two together and you get one powerful couple!
I also want to take a moment to say that Quinlan has my heart and I need to see more of him in book 2 please dear author! I will pay you in my tears and heart if I have too.
“If I die in a cage tomorrow, or I die in a cage in ten years – what is the difference? A cage is not a life.”
The world-building in Beasts of the Frozen Sun was… OMG seriously some of the best I’ve ever read. With history, there is always brutality and this novel does include that. Death, torture, the treatment of woman were all horrible and at times a bit hard to read but Jill Criswell has such raw talent at describing things that she does an amazing job writing those style of scenes. And with this being a story set back in history, those themes are inevitable. But each theme included, made Beasts of the Frozen Sun seem more and more realistic with each passing page.
The plot of this novel is everything!! Wars to villages raids to snuggles between Lira and Reyker. There was never a boring moment within Beasts of the Frozen Sun. It was packed with so much intensity that at times, it left you a bit exhausted. The plot was also dark and brutal but it fit with the story. This was a bloody amazing action-packed novel of magic and redemption, high stakes and brutal fights, powerful woman and monstrous men.
I am on my first ever book hangover. That ending… Jill Criswell is a cruel woman to leave me hanging in the way she did. But OHMAGAWD, I CAN NOT WAIT for book two of this series. Please, if you only ever pick up one book that I recommend, please please please pick this amazing novel up!
“When that dark womb of stillness engulfed him, he embraced it with a flood of relief. Reyker welcomed whatever torments waited him on the other side of this world, knowing it was nothing less than he deserved.”
Sophia (Bookwyrming Thoughts) (530 KP) rated Dualed (Dualed, #1) in Books
Jan 23, 2020
As <a href="http://thesocialpotato.maryfaye.net/"; target="_blank" rel="noopener">Faye from The Social Potato</a> puts it, this is about "assassin twins."
For some weird reason, I liked the idea. Come on, <b>thirty days to kill your supposedly "evil" twin before both of you self-detonate? Totally up my alley.</b>
That, however, does not mean I'm secretly a serial killer with a freakishly high IQ and gets a high off from killing people. (However, Lupe is still worried about my future regardless of my feeble protests. I think she's really just worried about the romance department, but I'm not exactly a mind reader despite our six-plus years of friendship.)
Anyways, I'm getting off-topic. <i>Dualed</i> is about assassin twins (I take no credit). In a bit of a contradiction to Faye, who summed this up perfectly, I'll say <i>Dualed</i> stalls. It's either the book stalling or West Grayer is a procrastinator. She's been training for years to kill her Alt (which I suppose are like "evil" twins, but Alts aren't necessarily "evil"), but then she finally gets her assignment.
As expected, it probably feels like a bulldozer has just plowed into you – I know I would be panicking all over the place. I totally understand why <b>West feels like she doesn't have enough training and decides to do something entirely illegal in The Board's eyes – killing someone else's Alt, otherwise known as a striker.</b> (Though in my case I'll probably turn into Hermione. Dye my hair blonde and make it curly than wavy. Claim I'm a Gryffindor and best friends with Harry Potter. Plan religiously and then go after my Alt with my wand crossed with my finger.)
I just felt that West waited until almost the last minute (read: the last couple of days) to go after her Alt. <b>She's going after everyone else's Alt as a striker while her days are counting down down down and when her friend Chord confronts her about it, she just makes an excuse.</b> It's one of those excuses you come up with lamely just to come up with one and when the "interrogator" fires back, you just end up speechless.
(Really it's just screaming "Lies lies lies so let me come up with an excuse in the hopes I won't be questioned further" all over.)
But the book just doesn't feel like it stalls. In fact, it doesn't stall. <b><i>Dualed</i> is very fast-paced, action-packed, and when West 1.0 (the main) meets West 2.0 (the Alt), it'll leave your heart pounding as the two go neck to neck for the chance to survive.</b> (The dark and evil side of me goes: Yeah! Blood and gore! *plays upbeat action music*) In comparison to a lot of dystopians out there, this is actually <b>a refreshingly new idea that'll attract bees to the honey.</b>
(I totally said that. Did it sound weird? My bad.)
So <b>here's my ultimatum: West Grayer is a procrastinator.</b> At the exact same time she starts questioning The Board while taking on striker duties and running away from her Alt. She finally realizes (or maybe Chord just verbally slaps her upside the head and it came through AT LAST) if she wants to live happily ever after as The Board says, she'll have to take the initiative and pounce before her Alt does it to her.
Overall, <i>Dualed</i> wasn't bad to listen to. Alicyn Packard definitely isn't my type of narrator, but I won't complain. I've finally figured out my favorite types of narrators are usually those who do a variety of different voices (one day I'm going to come across a cast and it'll be <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">MIND</span> EAR BLOWING). I give up on commenting on the narration of audiobooks unless it's really good or really bad.
<a href="https://bookwyrmingthoughts.com/audiobook-review-dualed-by-elsie-chapman/"; target="_blank">This review was originally posted on Bookwyrming Thoughts</a>
For some weird reason, I liked the idea. Come on, <b>thirty days to kill your supposedly "evil" twin before both of you self-detonate? Totally up my alley.</b>
That, however, does not mean I'm secretly a serial killer with a freakishly high IQ and gets a high off from killing people. (However, Lupe is still worried about my future regardless of my feeble protests. I think she's really just worried about the romance department, but I'm not exactly a mind reader despite our six-plus years of friendship.)
Anyways, I'm getting off-topic. <i>Dualed</i> is about assassin twins (I take no credit). In a bit of a contradiction to Faye, who summed this up perfectly, I'll say <i>Dualed</i> stalls. It's either the book stalling or West Grayer is a procrastinator. She's been training for years to kill her Alt (which I suppose are like "evil" twins, but Alts aren't necessarily "evil"), but then she finally gets her assignment.
As expected, it probably feels like a bulldozer has just plowed into you – I know I would be panicking all over the place. I totally understand why <b>West feels like she doesn't have enough training and decides to do something entirely illegal in The Board's eyes – killing someone else's Alt, otherwise known as a striker.</b> (Though in my case I'll probably turn into Hermione. Dye my hair blonde and make it curly than wavy. Claim I'm a Gryffindor and best friends with Harry Potter. Plan religiously and then go after my Alt with my wand crossed with my finger.)
I just felt that West waited until almost the last minute (read: the last couple of days) to go after her Alt. <b>She's going after everyone else's Alt as a striker while her days are counting down down down and when her friend Chord confronts her about it, she just makes an excuse.</b> It's one of those excuses you come up with lamely just to come up with one and when the "interrogator" fires back, you just end up speechless.
(Really it's just screaming "Lies lies lies so let me come up with an excuse in the hopes I won't be questioned further" all over.)
But the book just doesn't feel like it stalls. In fact, it doesn't stall. <b><i>Dualed</i> is very fast-paced, action-packed, and when West 1.0 (the main) meets West 2.0 (the Alt), it'll leave your heart pounding as the two go neck to neck for the chance to survive.</b> (The dark and evil side of me goes: Yeah! Blood and gore! *plays upbeat action music*) In comparison to a lot of dystopians out there, this is actually <b>a refreshingly new idea that'll attract bees to the honey.</b>
(I totally said that. Did it sound weird? My bad.)
So <b>here's my ultimatum: West Grayer is a procrastinator.</b> At the exact same time she starts questioning The Board while taking on striker duties and running away from her Alt. She finally realizes (or maybe Chord just verbally slaps her upside the head and it came through AT LAST) if she wants to live happily ever after as The Board says, she'll have to take the initiative and pounce before her Alt does it to her.
Overall, <i>Dualed</i> wasn't bad to listen to. Alicyn Packard definitely isn't my type of narrator, but I won't complain. I've finally figured out my favorite types of narrators are usually those who do a variety of different voices (one day I'm going to come across a cast and it'll be <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">MIND</span> EAR BLOWING). I give up on commenting on the narration of audiobooks unless it's really good or really bad.
<a href="https://bookwyrmingthoughts.com/audiobook-review-dualed-by-elsie-chapman/"; target="_blank">This review was originally posted on Bookwyrming Thoughts</a>
Lyndsey Gollogly (2893 KP) rated The Best Horror of the Year Volume 1 in Books
Apr 30, 2021
56 of 250
Book
The Best Horror of the Year Volume 1
Edited by Ellen Datlow
Once read a review will be written via Smashbomb and link posted in comments!
I will post in comments a short comment on each story!
An Air Force Loadmaster is menaced by strange sounds within his cargo; a man is asked to track down a childhood friend... who died years earlier; doomed pioneers forge a path westward as a young mother discovers her true nature; an alcoholic strikes a dangerous bargain with a gregarious stranger; urban explorers delve into a ruined book depository, finding more than they anticipated; residents of a rural Wisconsin town defend against a legendary monster; a woman wracked by survivor's guilt is haunted by the ghosts of a tragic crash; a detective strives to solve the mystery of a dismembered girl; an orphan returns to a wicked witch's candy house; a group of smugglers find themselves buried to the necks in sand; an unanticipated guest brings doom to a high-class party; a teacher attempts to lead his students to safety as the world comes to an end around them...
What frightens us, what unnerves us? What causes that delicious shiver of fear to travel the lengths of our spines? It seems the answer changes every year. Every year the bar is raised; the screw is tightened. Ellen Datlow knows what scares us; the twenty-one stories and poems included in this anthology were chosen from magazines, webzines, anthologies, literary journals, and single author collections to represent the best horror of the year.
Legendary editor Ellen Datlow (Poe: New Tales Inspired by Edgar Allan Poe), winner of multiple Hugo, Bram Stoker, and World Fantasy awards, joins Night Shade Books in presenting The Best Horror of the Year, Volume One.
1. Cargo by E.Michael Lewis
So chilling and so sad! This is short I dedication to the families of those children in Jonestown and the men and women who brought the bodies home.
2. If Angels Fight by Richard Bowes
This is about a man searching for his friend who was possessed by an Angel. On this journey you see and find out that this Angel left his friend and left a trail behind him to follow. His family never gave up he managed to find his friend and Angel Michael and return him to his home one last time. Only question was did he bring him home to find his sister to posses or to say goodbye to his mother?.
3. The Clay Party by Steve Duffy
A group of settlers embark on a journey for a new life in California in 1846, the journey does not go as expected. I was a bit bored at the beginning but certainly had a twist at the end.
4. Penguins of the Apocalypse by William Browning Spencer
This is brilliant! A man fighting his personal battles with alcohol! Now is the pulka and penguin freedom movement real or a fragment of his imagination while under the influence? Either way it was entertaining!
5. Esmeralda by Glen Hirshberg
This is a very strange little story involving the end of all books,pens and paper! Very odd!
6. The Hodog by Trent Hergenrader
A good old fashioned urban legend!
7. Very Low Flying Aircraft by Nicholas Royle
Not one for me didnt really grip me.
8. When the Gentlemen Go By. By Margaret Ronald
This was a bit chilling and I would love to have read more about these “Gentlemen” who come at night to make bargains!
9. The Lagerstatte by Laird Barron
Grief does strange things to our minds and body! This was quite chilling.
10. Harry and the Monkey by Euan Harvey
This really plays on every fear a parent has when their kids go missing especially in a place and time where children are vanishing!
11 Dress Circle by Miranda Siemeinowicz
12. The Rising River. By Daniel Kaysen
This was strange and after reading it I’m still not sure what’s happening 😂😂
13 Loup-Garou by R.B. Russell
I enjoyed this strange litte story set in my hometown of Birmingham. A little french film causes a little drama in this mans life.
14. Girl in pieces by Graham Edwards
This was my favourite! So far fetched into a world of monsters a detective helps a Golum save a girl cut to pieces! So much fun
15 It washed up by Joe R. Lonsdale
Wow how to pack a punch in 2 pages! Loved it!
16 The Man from the Peak by Adam Golaski
Brilliant short full of mystery blood and gore! Very well written.
17. The Narrows by Simon Bestwick
This actually chilled me I’d hate sending my child to school and have something like this happen which of course is totally possible.
I loved this book of small tales and discovering those writers I wouldn’t normally be exposed too!
Book
The Best Horror of the Year Volume 1
Edited by Ellen Datlow
Once read a review will be written via Smashbomb and link posted in comments!
I will post in comments a short comment on each story!
An Air Force Loadmaster is menaced by strange sounds within his cargo; a man is asked to track down a childhood friend... who died years earlier; doomed pioneers forge a path westward as a young mother discovers her true nature; an alcoholic strikes a dangerous bargain with a gregarious stranger; urban explorers delve into a ruined book depository, finding more than they anticipated; residents of a rural Wisconsin town defend against a legendary monster; a woman wracked by survivor's guilt is haunted by the ghosts of a tragic crash; a detective strives to solve the mystery of a dismembered girl; an orphan returns to a wicked witch's candy house; a group of smugglers find themselves buried to the necks in sand; an unanticipated guest brings doom to a high-class party; a teacher attempts to lead his students to safety as the world comes to an end around them...
What frightens us, what unnerves us? What causes that delicious shiver of fear to travel the lengths of our spines? It seems the answer changes every year. Every year the bar is raised; the screw is tightened. Ellen Datlow knows what scares us; the twenty-one stories and poems included in this anthology were chosen from magazines, webzines, anthologies, literary journals, and single author collections to represent the best horror of the year.
Legendary editor Ellen Datlow (Poe: New Tales Inspired by Edgar Allan Poe), winner of multiple Hugo, Bram Stoker, and World Fantasy awards, joins Night Shade Books in presenting The Best Horror of the Year, Volume One.
1. Cargo by E.Michael Lewis
So chilling and so sad! This is short I dedication to the families of those children in Jonestown and the men and women who brought the bodies home.
2. If Angels Fight by Richard Bowes
This is about a man searching for his friend who was possessed by an Angel. On this journey you see and find out that this Angel left his friend and left a trail behind him to follow. His family never gave up he managed to find his friend and Angel Michael and return him to his home one last time. Only question was did he bring him home to find his sister to posses or to say goodbye to his mother?.
3. The Clay Party by Steve Duffy
A group of settlers embark on a journey for a new life in California in 1846, the journey does not go as expected. I was a bit bored at the beginning but certainly had a twist at the end.
4. Penguins of the Apocalypse by William Browning Spencer
This is brilliant! A man fighting his personal battles with alcohol! Now is the pulka and penguin freedom movement real or a fragment of his imagination while under the influence? Either way it was entertaining!
5. Esmeralda by Glen Hirshberg
This is a very strange little story involving the end of all books,pens and paper! Very odd!
6. The Hodog by Trent Hergenrader
A good old fashioned urban legend!
7. Very Low Flying Aircraft by Nicholas Royle
Not one for me didnt really grip me.
8. When the Gentlemen Go By. By Margaret Ronald
This was a bit chilling and I would love to have read more about these “Gentlemen” who come at night to make bargains!
9. The Lagerstatte by Laird Barron
Grief does strange things to our minds and body! This was quite chilling.
10. Harry and the Monkey by Euan Harvey
This really plays on every fear a parent has when their kids go missing especially in a place and time where children are vanishing!
11 Dress Circle by Miranda Siemeinowicz
12. The Rising River. By Daniel Kaysen
This was strange and after reading it I’m still not sure what’s happening 😂😂
13 Loup-Garou by R.B. Russell
I enjoyed this strange litte story set in my hometown of Birmingham. A little french film causes a little drama in this mans life.
14. Girl in pieces by Graham Edwards
This was my favourite! So far fetched into a world of monsters a detective helps a Golum save a girl cut to pieces! So much fun
15 It washed up by Joe R. Lonsdale
Wow how to pack a punch in 2 pages! Loved it!
16 The Man from the Peak by Adam Golaski
Brilliant short full of mystery blood and gore! Very well written.
17. The Narrows by Simon Bestwick
This actually chilled me I’d hate sending my child to school and have something like this happen which of course is totally possible.
I loved this book of small tales and discovering those writers I wouldn’t normally be exposed too!
Dean (6927 KP) Dec 2, 2019
Phillip McSween (751 KP) Dec 3, 2019 (Updated Dec 3, 2019)