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Zombie Kidz Evolution
Zombie Kidz Evolution
2018 | Horror, Kids Game, Zombie / Survivalist
You know how you are just browsing BGG and come across some surprising statistics? For example, if you click on a ranking number on a game’s profile page, it will take you to the entire list of games including that search term. I do not believe I had checked on “Children’s Game” ranks for quite some time, so I was taken aback when I noticed that Zombie Kidz Evolution ranks #1 overall, per BGG users. Well, heck. I have children. They like games. I should probably check this out, right? Absolutely!

Zombie Kidz Evolution is a cooperative, horror/zombies, dice rolliling, variable player powers, LEGACY game… for children?? Those mechanics do not scream “children” to me at all! What gives here? In this one, players take on the role of children protecting their schoolhouse from infiltrating zombies, and all players win or lose together. Through multiple plays, however, the game evolves and the way in which the game is played also evolves. Oh, and there’s also stickers, which ALL children love.


To setup, determine play count and which side of the board to play. Each player chooses a standee to represent them, place out one zombie tile in each area with a fence gate, and the other zombies randomly in a line near the board. The lock tokens should be placed nearby and the die is given to the starting player (in our house, my son, as he will cry if we didn’t). The player standees, “kids” from here out, are placed in the central room of the schoolhouse and the game is ready to begin!
Zombie Kidz Evolution is played over several turns, and each turn consists of three or four actions. First, the active player rolls the die. The die face determines in which school zone a zombie tile will spawn. There are five colored spaces relating to five of the six die faces, with one die face being blank – no zombies spawn on that roll. After placing the zombie tile in the appropriate zone, the player may move their kid to an adjacent zone or leave them where they are. However, if a zone contains three or more zombies, the kids cannot enter.

After movement, the player may then eliminate one or two zombies in their zone. This happens automatically – there are no combat mechanics. The player simply removes one or two zombie tiles and places them at the end of the line off-board. Should two kids occupy the same zone outside the school where a fence gate is unlocked, they may high-five and place a lock token on the gate. After this step, the die is passed to the next player for their turn.


The game continues in this fashion of taking turns spawning and eliminating zombies until the players have locked all four gates outside the schoolhouse. A brain sticker is applied to the appropriate space on the back of the rulebook to track victories, and if enough stickers have been applied, players may be allowed to open one of the 13 sealed envelopes. Inside these envelopes are an assortment of items, most of which I am unable to disclose. However, more stickers may be applied to certain components, thus changing their functions completely for subsequent plays – just as all good legacy games provide. If playing with children, expect to play several games in sequence, as it is very addicting.
Components. The physical components in this game are all fine. The standees, board, and tokens are unspectacular, but do their job. The die is cool, but under weak lighting the blue and green can be difficult to differentiate. I will not discuss anything contained in the envelopes, and I apologize for that, but I do not want to spoil anything. The art style, though, is what does it for me. Every component proudly displays amazing artwork, and half the fun is watching little ones stare and smile at the components on the table. My only request here, and I cannot believe I am saying this, is that I do wish the player pieces were minis instead of standees, but I understand the decision to keep the cardboard standees in to keep the price point super reasonable. Outside that, this little box has a ton of game inside it.

My 5-year-old son is completely addicted to this game! He requests we play almost every night, and I happily oblige, as I really enjoy it as well. Yes, it is very light. Hardcore gamers probably will not get much enjoyment out of it, though I could certainly be wrong as well. We have found it to provide so much joy to our family, and though the box says it is intended for ages 7+, I encourage parents of younger children to give it a try as well. The turns are simple: roll, spawn, move, remove, and possibly lock. We are a modern household, so zombies in this game are just “taken care of” instead of “killed,” so we are able to skirt our problematic verbiage. There isn’t much we can do to soften the art of all the kids wielding weapons, though, so beware if that is against your parenting style.

As a game, and especially as a children’s game, this one is just incredible. I can certainly understand why it is rated #1 in Children’s Games on BGG. The game tackles more advanced mechanics and throws them into a game meant for little ones. And it does this beautifully. Unfortunately, though, I have noticed that my son now is exhibiting some completionist behaviors, as he likes to complete missions in the rulebook so we can advance toward opening more and more envelopes. It is so very easy for Purple Phoenix Games to give this one a well-deserved 20 / 24. That score includes opinions from not only Laura and me, but also my wife and son. We all love it!

If you are looking for an lighter (at first) legacy game to get your feet wet, I cannot recommend Zombie Kidz Evolution enough. Adults may be able to breeze through a few games in a night, but don’t expect it to be a pushover. The die will still roll against your wishes and fill up zones you wanted to clear, and then that blocks your movement through that zone, or you may find it difficult to travel around the board very easily, as kids can only move one zone each turn, so when they are three zones away from trauma, the pressure becomes real. We have probably lost almost as many games as we have won, but we have always had a great time. And when you are spending this quality time with the people you love, “taking care of” zombies, you want to tell the whole world to enjoy the game as much as you have. So, go grab yourselves a copy right now!
  
X-Men: First Class (2011)
X-Men: First Class (2011)
2011 | Action, Drama, Sci-Fi
X-Men finally given a decent treatment (0 more)
Fassbender's Irish accent (0 more)
I'm not an X-Men fan. I know, it's strange, right? I mean, I'm a comic book fan in general. Iron Man's a dude. I dig the Hulk. I love all things Batman (except when Joel Schumacher tweaked the Batman's Batnipples). I geekgasmed all over my trousers in the lead up to THE DARK KNIGHT and actually watching it at an IMAX was like losing my virginity again. But the X-Men? Kinda leave me cold. Even though, on the face of it, it should be pretty awesome. Mutant humans with the ability to do just about anything you can imagine, fighting each other and various other bad things? Why the hell wouldn't I like that? But I could never get into it. The first X-Men movie, way back in 2000, left me feeling indifferent. It was OK, but nothing special. The second one was worse. The third one just plain awful. WOLVERINE: ORIGINS was quite fun, but then, a hard drinking, smoking, swearing brawler with friendly mutton-chops and blades in his hands was always going to be appealing to me.

And so, it was with a feeling of complete indifference that I flashed my Cineworld Unlimited card at a bored usher and got my ticket and a mixed slushie last week. I only went to see it because my buddy wanted to and, well, we'd missed the start of THE HANGOVER PART II.

So, into the darkened room early for a change. Managed to get prime seats. Mainly because the auditorium was pretty much empty. Something I didn't think was the most fortuitous portent to the movie we were about to watch. On the plus side however, as we were watching a comic book movie, we got the comic book trailer reel... First was THE GREEN LANTERN, which excited me a little (mainly because I have a man crush on Ryan Reynolds). Then came CAPTAIN AMERICA, which excited me a little more (mainly because it looks FREAKIN' AWESOME). Then we got RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES, which intrigued me (mainly because James Franco was doing a 'learned man' accent). Presumably because Cineworld were already scraping the comic book movie barrel, they then repeated the APES trailer, which killed the mood and left me feeling indifferent again.

But I digress. I think you get that I didn't really give a crap one way or the other about the movie I was about to watch. The opening scenes however, are set in a WWII concentration camp and I found my interest piqued. At first, I couldn't figure out whether it had been newly filmed or if they were recycling one of the flashbacks from one of the earlier movies. Then, Kevin Bacon. Suddenly, I was transfixed by the German pouring forth from his mouth which seemed authentic and I couldn't quite work out if he was lip-synching or not. That's somewhat besides the point though, as the scene itself was very tense and only marginally spoiled by the child actor when it was his turn to scream the longest NOOOOOOO!!! (sorry, NEEEEEEEEIN!!!) since Adolf Vader in Episode 3.

The film very quickly moved on in leaps and bounds, sucking me in and winning me over. Kevin Bacon seemed to enjoy hamming it up as the evil Sebastian Shaw. James McAvoy is an exceptionally talented chap and made for an excellent Charles Xavier - a cocky, beer-swilling, genius ladies man. Similarly, Michael Fassbender did a top notch job in playing Erik Lehnsherr, coming across as a Holocaust-surviving Bond, maybe even slightly cooler. Even Jason Flemyng was pretty good, although I don't think he actually spoke at all, which might have helped his case.

I loved the whole origins story, seeing how Xavier and Lehnsherr were good friends despite their obvious differences and started the School for the Gifted together was pretty cool. The only little blight on the movie (after the whole NEEEEEEEIN!!! incident) was that when it came time for Fassbender to don Magneto's helmet, the prop department had obviously measured his noggin wrong and it was clearly too tight. I say that because, every time he slapped it on his dome, his accent turned from gruff-hero-of-indeterminate-country-of-origin to... Well, to Oirish. The only reason I can think of is that the helmet was squeezing his bonce a bit too snugly. It didn't happen when Kevin Bacon was wearing it.

Helmet business aside, on the whole, I left feeling like I'd just seen a proper comic book movie. Full of fantastical, incredible things dancing around a plot that made sense and characters that I, on the whole, cared about at least a little. There was even a Wolverine cameo in it, which made me chuckle more than it should have. Far from being indifferent towards the X-Men now, I'm looking forward to seeing where the story goes next. I just hope Matthew Vaughn is directing again. He's turned out an X-Men film that is much, much better than mediocre and they'd be idiots to give it to anyone else.
  
Harsh Times (2005)
Harsh Times (2005)
2005 | Crime, Drama
Writer and director (and sometimes producer) David Ayer debuted in the film industry writing films such as Training Day, The Fast and the Furious, and S.W.A.T. but he came into his own once he started directing and producing (as well as continuing to write) his own projects with End of Watch and Fury being two of his best. In the past couple years, Ayer has produced and directed two big budget films (Suicide Squad and Bright) in the past few years that received a negative critical reputation that audiences still seem to love (sequels for both are in development). The first film David Ayer produced, wrote, and directed that’s more in the vein of Training Day and End of Watch and is largely based on the individuals Ayer knew while living in South Central, Los Angeles is a little crime film called Harsh Times.

Jim Luther Davis (Christian Bale) seems like a normal guy that anyone could know. Now that he’s done his time as a soldier, it’s now his dream to become a cop in Los Angeles. Unfortunately though, Jim likes to spend most days drinking, smoking pot, and looking for ways to either get laid or kick the snot out of someone and his time as a soldier gets to him more than he lets on. He has nightmares every night and wakes up screaming with cold chills and is on the verge of downright insanity.

His best friend, Mike Alonzo (Freddy Rodriguez), has the intention of getting a job to make his wife happy but his drinking problem stands in the way of that. While Mike has his wife, Sylvia (Eva Longoria), Jim has his girlfriend, Marta (Tammy Trull), back in Mexico that he hopes to get across the border once he gets that dream job. One day, Jim gets a call from Homeland Security and Mike has an interview go surprisingly well at one of the best businesses in town; the two best friends think their lives are beginning to look up. However, Jim gets pushed too far and innocent people are suddenly caught in the crossfire.

Harsh Times plays out like a song that becomes a sleeper hit or one that eventually evolves into one of your favorites; events unfold rather slowly but they’re also building towards a big finale. Once the ball gets rolling, it’s inevitable to try and resist the mayhem that’s sure to ensue. Harsh Times may not be that appealing on the surface, but David Ayer has mastered the dynamic of two cops (one is usually Caucasian and the other is usually Hispanic or African American) set within a broken neighborhood. Watching Jim and Mike give into their vices and basically flush their dreams down the toilet by relishing the deteriorated reputation they’re known for is a riveting train wreck. Aside from Christian Bale’s outstanding performance, the real gem of the film lies within the last 20 minutes.

Ayer typically aims to shock or catch you off guard with the finales of his crime films, but there’s also a scene involving Jim that is unexpected. It’s an intriguing scene that is spontaneous in nature, but it puts what Jim went through as a soldier into perspective. Jim is completely unfazed by what he puts himself through, but Mike seems to be physically traumatized by the whole ordeal. It seems rather unimportant as it’s occurring, but it’s also the most memorable sequence once the credits roll. Before Don’t Breathe came along in 2016, this was the worst way any Hollywood film ever utilized a turkey baster.

For several years, Christian Bale was known for dramatically changing his appearance and using a different accent in every project he was a part of. Watching Harsh Times after seeing Batman Begins (both films were released in 2005) for the first time allows you to appreciate Bale’s performance even more. Imagine Batman or even Bruce Wayne trying to say with a straight face, “Yeah, homie. That’s how we roll in these streets, dawg.” It seems implausible and almost otherworldly; it’s a transition you never expected Bale to make. The transformation of the Jim Luther Davis character is incredible. The film’s editing when Jim is going through one of his episodes is an admirable nod to how unstable he is. Once the screen has that yellow tint to it, you know something detrimental is about to go down.

Harsh Times has a reputation for being slow and boring, but it’s worth a watch especially if you’re a fan of David Ayer films. The crime film may not appeal to everyone, but it probably has a lot more to offer than anyone gives it credit for. Christian Bale has a particularly strong performance in the film that deserves to behold and the intense finale should make up for any slow or dragging sequences. If you’re watching the film for the first time, try giving it a chance when you know you have a more patient mentality. You may be pleasantly surprised with Harsh Times.

Harsh Times is available to stream on YouTube, Google Play, and Vudu for $2.99 and iTunes for $3.99. It’s available on Amazon Prime for free if you have Showtime with Prime Video channels. The film is available on Amazon on DVD for $7.96 and Multi-Format Blu-ray for $13.49. The pre-owned DVD is currently $4.09 with free shipping while a brand new Multi-Format Blu-ray is $15.98 with free shipping on eBay.
  
Good Boys (2019)
Good Boys (2019)
2019 | Comedy
Laugh out loud funny at times. (0 more)
Repetitive. (1 more)
Too similar to other R-rated teen comedies.
Thor Casts Anal Bead Nunchucks
“Bean Bag Boys for life!” In Good Boys, that’s the motto for three 12-year-old best friends that are finding the sixth grade way more profound and coercing than the fifth grade or any other grade before it ever was. Max (Jacob Tremblay) is at the age where girls aren’t so gross and are actually quite arousing, Thor (Brady Noon) is giving up on who he is and what he loves in a bold attempt to try to fit in with kids who he thinks are cool, and Lucas (Keith L. Williams) mostly just loves Magic: The Gathering, treating women with respect, and being honest.

Two weeks into sixth grade and the boys find themselves invited to their first party, but the catch is that it’s a kissing party and none of them know how to kiss. They use Max’s dad’s drone to spy on high school girls Hannah (Molly Gordon) and Lily (Midori Francis), but the girls end up capturing the drone and holding it for ransom. After a face-to-face meeting goes south, Thor steals Hannah’s purse which includes two capsules of Molly/ecstasy in a kid’s chewy vitamins bottle. Now in possession of illegal drugs after skipping school and using Max’s dad’s drone without permission while he’s out of town, the boys need to figure out a way to get the drone back home without his dad knowing so Max won’t get grounded all so they can still attend the kissing party and become legends of the sixth grade.

Good Boys is co-written and co-directed (only Stupnitsky received credit) by Gene Stupnitsky and Lee Eisenberg (writers of Year One and Bad Teacher). The film is produced by Seth Green’s Point Grey Pictures and Good Universe (both Neighbors films, The Disaster Artist, Long Shot). This is all worth mentioning to get an idea of what you’re diving into if you plan on seeing this film. The R-rated comedy attempts to capture what Superbad did for teenagers over a decade ago, but replaces the teenage element with tweens. Whether they’re successful or not is entirely up to you.

There are some decent laugh-out-loud moments in Good Boys, but their long-lasting effect is short-lived because Stupnitsky and Eisenberg decided to repeat those laugh out loud moments over and over again to the point of annoyance. The main laughs of the film come from the boys trying to talk about adult things they don’t fully understand (cum pronounced as koom, a sex doll being a CPR dummy, a nymphomaniac is someone who likes to have sex at sea and on land, etc), thinking sex toys are weapons, and still not being able to get past the child proof lid on a vitamin bottle. These are all funny at first, but all the gags in the film fall under the same handful of categories and essentially feel like Stupnitsky and Eisenberg didn’t have enough creativity in the script writing process to think outside a smattering of raunch.

The typo’d “porb” sequence where the boys attempt to look up how to kiss on the internet, the crossing the busy highway on the way to the mall sequence, and Lucas being so adamant about a woman’s consent are more humorous elements because they’re not as overplayed into the ground; even the opening where Max is on the verge of masturbation seems like a cheap knock off of what Not Another Teen Movie did in its opening sequence nearly 20 years ago. In comparison, Olivia Wilde’s Booksmart from earlier this year was labeled as a female version of Superbad. The Superbad influence is there, but Booksmart adds a refreshing female perspective and explores what the future means for the main characters to a more satisfying extent.

Growing up and what that means to a 12-year-old is explored in Good Boys, but it seems awkward. You’re on the verge of becoming a teenager, which shouldn’t mean all that much for you other than attending a new school. Lucas’ parents are in the middle of a divorce and Thor is trying to be something he isn’t just for his reputation. The characters learn something over the course of the film because of this, but the entire maturing angle doesn’t feel right. Part of it is meant to be ridiculous, especially after Lucas says something like, “I’ve grown up a lot in the past two hours,” and it’s cool that the film goes out of its way to tell the audience to never be ashamed of what you love, but it all feels sloppy and thrown together at the last minute.

This is the first R-rated film to ever have a rating that includes, “all involving tweens,” and this could be seen as the Superbad of this generation, but Good Boys simply doesn’t differentiate itself from the high school and college R-rated comedies that came before it to be memorable or enjoyable. It will likely be a crowd pleaser anyway since the theater I was in was full of laughs from the general public, but its charm is ruined so early on and that’s a painful thing to say when your film is only 90 minutes long. Good Boys may be outrageous and funny at times, but its generic formula destroys what little entertainment value it potentially had.
  
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Purple Phoenix Games (2266 KP) rated Houses of Knowledge in Tabletop Games

Mar 26, 2020 (Updated Mar 26, 2020)  
Houses of Knowledge
Houses of Knowledge
2020 | Card Game, Humor
Museums. You know, the places you go with your family for, “fun bonding and learning experiences.” I have always been a big fan of museums. Art, Science & History, Aquariums, all of them! I like to stop and read the plaques too, but many times I am rushed along because EVERYTHING has to be seen. But did you know that museum curation could be interesting and cutthroat? I did not. Not until I played Houses of Knowledge, that is.

Houses of Knowledge pits 2-4 players against each other as museum curators desperately trying to fill their museums with interesting rooms and curious artifacts. In fact, a curator can end the competition once they are able to display eight lovely pieces in their halls. Beware, however, as the competition is also trying to gather the best gallery and may even attempt to pilfer your displayed items!

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, but the final components will be exactly the same as these shown, if the pending Kickstarter campaign is successful. Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game, but to give our readers a general feel for how the game plays. You can back the game through the Kickstarter campaign, order from your FLGS, or purchase through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T

Setting up a game of Houses of Knowledge is quite a feat, as different decks need to be assembled according to player count. Refer to the rules to setup each deck. Once the decks are prepared and starting cards dealt to each player, create the Items and Actions markets by revealing six cards from each deck and assigning cost discs in decending order from the draw decks. Furthest away from the two draw decks will be placed the deck of Room cards, with two visible and available for purchase. These rooms will receive the leftover 5-value cost disc. Set the monicash aside to be used as a central bank. Determine the starting player and you are ready to begin!

Luckily, the game furnishes the players with reference cards so that all players have access to all options they are afforded on their turns. The first thing that happens on a turn is collecting income. Each turn a player earns 3 monicash (MC) plus the amounts earned from Rooms in their tableau. From here a turn has several options: buying Items or Actions from the market to your hand, paying 2 MC to play a card from your hand to your tableau, selling two cards for 2 MC, and buying Room cards.

When a player buys an Item or Action card from the market the new card is taken in hand, paying the cost shown on the cost disc either above or below the card taken. To play a card from hand, the player pays 2 MC to the bank and places an Item onto a corresponding Room card, or plays an Action card either on their own tableau or against an opponent.

Play continues in this fashion until one player is displaying eight Items in their Rooms or the draw decks are depleted. The round finishes completely so all players have an equal amount of turns, and then points are tallied and summed to determine the greatest curator and winner of Houses of Knowledge!

Components. As I mentioned in my disclaimer, we were provided a copy of this game for this preview. All components we were provided are finalized, so everything you see pictured here is how it will be upon a successful Kickstarter campaign. That said, the components are fantastic! The cards are good quality, the cost discs are good cardboard chips, and the money is the faux-paper money we are starting to see in games nowadays – and thank heavens for that! No more cheap Monopoly money! Oh by the way, the art on this one is superb and very chic. I love it!

So the game looks and feels great, but does it play well? YES. This one is excellent! At first it feels too simple because it is relatively easy to collect Rooms and Items to fit on those Rooms, so you think, “Heck, I can get eight Items in like four rounds!” That is, until your opponents hit you with some of the Action cards they’ve been hoarding unseen by you. One “friend” maybe steals one of your Items because you neglected to assign Guards to it, or the “pal” just before you in initiative order rearranges the Item cards so that the ones you wanted are now much more expensive, thus throwing your carefully-planned tactics down the drain. Ooh, it’s great tension! My one gripe: I wish it was longer so that I could really stick it to my enem- uhh, friends.

If you are a fan of card games that pack more of a punch than it first seems, and games that keep you wanting more, whilst giving you a grand feeling of quirky opulence, then you should certainly check out Houses of Knowledge. We are happy to recommend this one. Go back it on Kickstarter when the campaign begins!
  
Tetris: The Card Game
Tetris: The Card Game
2011 | Abstract Strategy, Card Game, Video Game Theme
One of the first video games I can remember playing is Tetris. The colorful Tetrominoes, the catchy theme music, the excitement (and anxiety!) as the speed gradually increases – what isn’t there to love? Tetris is an addicting game that has withstood the test of time, so I was extremely excited when I was gifted Tetris: The Card Game. Does the card version have a foothold in the Tetris fandom? Or does it fail to complete any rows in the matrix? (Haha, see what I did there?)

Tetris: The Card Game is a game of hand management and pattern recognition in which players are racing to be the first to earn 10 points. Setup is simple – shuffle the entire deck of cards, and deal 10 to each player. The cards are double-sided, with one side depicting a Tetris Matrix, and the other depicting a specific Tetromino. Arrange your cards in a 2×5 grid, with the Tetromino side facing up. This grid will act as your personal scoring track. Place the remaining cards, Matrix-side up, in a draw deck in the center of the table. Deal 1 additional card to each player, to go in hand, and the game is ready to begin! You will be using your hand of cards, Tetromino side, to complete the Matrix side of the top card of the draw deck.


A round of play is pretty straight-forward: draw one card, play one card. At the start of your turn, draw the top card from the draw deck. This will reveal a new Matrix on the next card of the draw pile. Choose one of your two cards in hand to complete at least 1 row in the revealed Matrix. Play the card, showing your opponents how it would fit into the Matrix, and score points. You score 1 point per row completed, so if your piece completes 2 rows, you would score 2 points. To track your points, you flip over cards in your 2×5 grid to their Matrix sides, to represent your scored points. If on your turn, you are unable to complete a Matrix line with either of your cards in hand, you must discard one card, and are also penalized by having to forfeit one of your earned points, flipping that card back to its Tetromino side. There are also a handful of Special cards that can be used to manipulate play, whether Reversing the play direction, or forcing a player to lose a point, and that adds a new little twist to the game. The game ends when one player has scored all 10 points and is declared the winner!
Probably the best things about Tetris: The Card Game, is that it is so simple to learn and play. The simplicity brings back the nostalgia of the original game to the extreme. It’s a super light game that can be used as a filler/palate cleanser between bigger games, or just as a game to toss on the table when you’ve got 5 free minutes. Another added bonus of its simplicity is that it is pretty friendly for younger/newer gamers. Looking to get your young’uns into the hobby, or just spreading some happiness with friends and colleagues? This is a good introductory game that is light-hearted, although not a complete brain burner.


Now, on the flip side, there are some drawbacks to this game. The first and biggest being that it is entirely based upon the luck of the draw. There is pretty much no strategy involved, because you are at the mercy of the draw deck. You really can’t set up a game strategy that can be adapted throughout a play because the game is so dependent upon luck. Depending on the current Matrix in play, certain Tetrominos could not be used at all to complete a row, so you end up having to burn a turn (and losing a point) to discard a card. And then you have to hope for the best next turn. Another drawback of this version of Tetris is the hand limit of 2 cards. That severely limits your options each turn, and can turn the game from light-hearted to frustrating because of a lack of choices. This hand limit also limits any strategic options. Certain Matrices can only be completed by certain Tetrominos, so unless you have those in hand, you’re stuck wasting a turn. The Special cards included in the game add a twist to the gameplay, but are a little too ‘take that’ for my taste. But without them, there is no player interaction at all. So it’s kind of a lose-lose situation for me in that regard.

Ultimately, I would say that the OG Tetris is still king. This game attempts to encompass the atmosphere and enjoyability of the video game, but it just falls flat for me. It is too dependent upon luck, and doesn’t offer enough strategic choices for players, so it ends up feeling bland and unengaging. Am I happy with this game? Honestly, no. But playing this with the right group of people could still result in some entertainment and good times. If luck-based games are your thing, then definitely consider this game. But if not, let OG Tetris be your go-to game to fulfill your tile-dropping, row-completing urges. Purple Phoenix Games gives Tetris: The Card Game a blocky 4 / 12.
  
Fantastic Beasts: Crimes of Grindelwald (2018)
Fantastic Beasts: Crimes of Grindelwald (2018)
2018 | Adventure, Family, Fantasy, Mystery
Well where do I start? I love the fact that there is no substantial synopsis for this film, a lot have just gone with "the ongoing adventures of Newt Scamander" or similarly vague offerings.

It's difficult to separate them from their Harry Potter ancestry. They are of course the same universe. If you can sever the links then the films aren't too bad, but they're not amazing either. The other issue is that with the links you're obviously given lots of issues with continuity and timelines.

After only given a brief sighting of Grindelwald in the first film we're sold a creepy and scary version in this one very early on. His suspension during the transfer to the coach gives him the sinister grace of a dementor. This leads to the first of two problems for me. Abernathy in this whole introductory section is odd and you can tell something is up, so when we're eventually presented with that was happening it wasn't a surprise.

Here's problem two. Once Grindelwald is secured in the coach the rest of the sequence takes place outside, in the dark, in a storm. Very atmospheric with striking shots... most of which you can't see because of the lightning and rain. Everything is so fast that it's just a blur. It seems to be a popular occurrence recently and I will never understand why you would spend so much money on them when you can't see what's happening. One of the bits that you can see properly is the ghostly face of Grindelwald appearing in the coach window... which is a shame because it felt like it was awfully done and could have used some covering up.

As a quick note while I remember, I would like to acknowledge the impressive advances in wizarding technology. Early roombas and Fitbits. Great job!

Looking back over the notes most of them were about characters. Barely any about storyline. Just one thing that seemed completely out of place/inaccurate, and that was Minerva McGonagall. I'm not well enough versed in Harry Potter history but looking at the chatter I don't think her timeline matches with that of the film... but I'll leave that to the super nerds. If it is inaccurate it would have been very easy to avoid so it seems ridiculous to have had in at all.

The fluffy, feathered and scaly friends also need an honourable mention. *gets out soap box and steps up* Nifflers rule. I will fight anyone who thinks otherwise. Although, bad film! Getting my hopes up and then dashing them. You give them leeway with the animation considering they're fantastic beasts, but the only creatures that don't really have a decent presence on screen are the matagots that protect the Ministry of Magic. Even as hairless catlike creatures you'd expect something a little more impressive than what feels like CGI with a layer of detail missing.

I'm also intrigued by the phoenix. Is it Fawkes? How did Albus get his? Of course I could have missed things that answer all of the questions I have about it.

After reviewing all my notes I can (un)happily say that almost all of the women come off quite badly in this film. Bunty, Newt's assistant (I hope that was her name, she was fairly forgetable other than this point), came over as a little creepy with her comments that clearly show her affections for him. Queenie has a bit of a transformation in this one. She's still got her optimistic outlook but she's devolving a bit. Tina is taken by jealousy, which seems a little off for her. The newest addition of Nagini came out relatively unscathed and I'm hoping for an intriguing ongoing story for her.

The male characters came off slightly better. Jacob and Flamel were some welcome relief from this bleak installment of the franchise. Hats off to Callum Turner and Joshua Shea though. They both managed to pick up the Newt mannerisms really well. I can appreciate it even though it's one of the things I dislike about Fantastic Beasts, the constant head tilting.

Jude Law as Albus Dumbledore still doesn't sit quite right, but he made a reasonable job of it. He doesn't quite hold the same presence in the scenes as you'd expect him to for the man he becomes though. Everyone also got into a tizzy about his sexuality. Who cares? Whether he is or isn't gay makes no difference to the movie whatsoever. Just enjoy a film a don't worry about it until it's relevant.

It really is difficult to sum the story line up for this one. There's a reason that everyone has generalised the synopsis. It's just a lot of nothing in particular. It's part two of five. There didn't really seem to be a lot apart from filler. What I can tell you is that the first time I saw this (I went to the midnight screening at Vue originally) I fell asleep through a significant chunk in the middle and yet I still came out with the same understanding and enjoyment as I did after the second time.

What you should do

You're going to have to see it at some point if you're into the HP universe. Just a statement of fact there!

Movie thing you wish you could take home

That magic spell for collapsing all my belongings into a couple of trunks, I'm assuming it would come in handy for cleaning as well.
  
WizBang!
WizBang!
2020 | Card Game
The current COVID-19 lockdown has really placed a burden on gaming with groups of 3 or more. Luckily, not all games are intended for medium or larger groups. I can sometimes game with up to 4 players but I am mostly able to game with my wife… when the kids (rarely) nap or are asleep for the night. So when I saw that WizBang! is a card dueling game for 2 players only I jumped at the chance to preview it. How did it fare for my wife and I? Keep reading.

A-la-kalhambra! A wizard’s duel has been accepted between you and your rival. Based on the whims of judges wanting displays of specific and ever-changing magic-types, you must cast a flurry of impressive spells to best your opponent. The duel will last exactly 6 rounds and the greatest spellslinger will reign supreme.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and the final components may be different from these shown. Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game. You are invited to download the rulebook, back the game through the Kickstarter campaign launching in August, or purchase through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T

WizBang! is a two-player card dueling game akin to a mashup of War and Crazy 8s. To setup, shuffle the large deck of WizBang! cards, and deal 30 to each player. Similarly, shuffle the small deck of Extra Trick Up My Sleeve cards and deal four to each player. Roll the magic die, place it on the Round 1 section of the round tracking card and the game is ready to begin!

A game of WizBang! is short, sweet, and light on rules. Perfect for that lockdown date night. The game lasts 6 rounds, and each round consists of playing five cards. First things first – roll that magic die. Yellow is Shiny magic, green is Slimy magic, and purple is Weird magic. This means that for the duration of the round, the judges only care about the values that correspond with the rolled magic type. So if Shiny is rolled, each card played (a la War) will compare Shiny values. Highest number wins both cards to the player’s VP stack.

However, Extra Trick Up My Sleeve cards can be played at any time, and can affect either yourself or your opponent. I have included some of those below. These cards do not count for VP at game end, but can certainly shake things up quite a bit during a round. In addition to these special cards, included in the WizBang deck are several Wizard cards that change the preferred magic type for the round or just for one trick. Once all six rounds have been played players count up their VP Spell cards and majority wins! If no majority: SUDDEN DEATH round.

Components. As I mentioned previously, we were provided a prototype copy of the game, but were assured that it is very close to the final version. This game is a bunch of cards and one die. The cards are nice and a little glossy, with sometimes funny art, and even better inside jokes on them. The die is nice quality and easy to interpret which magic source is being judged. All in all the components are good.

I also stated previously that this game is quick. The box says around 10-15 minutes and that’s spot on. I can see seasoned players being able to knock out a game in 5, but for the first few games we were in that 10-15 minute range. What I like about the game is that it is quick. We were needing something to fill a short timeframe, so I broke this one out, taught it to my wife, and played through once or twice before a child needed Mommy. So it definitely fits that bill.

However, the game play itself is a little lacking. Don’t get me wrong – I would play this again, and I would even use it to help teach my son (4 years old) several gaming concepts, but without using the cheat cards. It is basically a combination of War (play a card, winner takes both) and Crazy 8s/UNO (constantly changing trumps) with a wizard duel theme. I love wizards/fantasy themes in my games, so I am still somewhat drawn to this, but ultimately, if I want to play War or Crazy 8s, I might simply break out a normal deck of playing cards to do so.

The game is not at all bad. I really want to stress this. Just for gamers, it is a bit elementary. This would be great in a library’s game collection, or for educational purposes, or even simply as a quick filler game if you want a theme for your War/Crazy 8s hankerin. Need a game for younger gamers? Yes, this. Need a quick game for grandparents or in-law nongamers? This. Don’t know what to play and you’re running out of time (happens to me OFTEN)? This. If you need something like WizBang! in your collection to fill a 2-player fantasy card game hole, definitely check this one out.
  
40x40

KalJ95 (25 KP) rated Final Fantasy VII Remake in Video Games

Jun 10, 2020 (Updated Jun 10, 2020)  
Final Fantasy VII Remake
Final Fantasy VII Remake
2020 | Action/Adventure, Role-Playing
Combat Is Fluid, Weighty And Satisfying. (2 more)
The Protagonists Are Well Thought Out.
I Can't Wait For The Next Part.
Side missions Are Tedious And Boring (2 more)
The Middle Is A Slog To Go Through,
Parts Of The Story Needed Removing
A Classic Reborn.
I understand the impact FFVII has had on both video game narratives, and storytelling itself. It remains a staple mark on video games, and as such is held so highly amongst developers as the standard of how great a narrative can be, and its hard to argue. I haven't even played the original 1997 release, but I know the story beats and main moments. Its an incredible journey, with fascinating characters, rolled into moments of twists and turns. Once a remake was announced, it obviously was met with massive anticipation, and worrying doubt. Could you possibly pull off a remake of classic and make fans old and new fall in love all over again?

The answer is a yes, but only just. I played FFVIIR as a brand new player, knowing nothing of the characters or story of what happens in Midgar, and began being completely enthralled. The opening is a chapter of fast edged combat and moral dilemmas of actions taken by our heroes. Its explosive, bursting with huge set pieces and cheesy dialogue. I loved every moment, and this was only the tutorial. The implications ride high throughout the whole experience when you see the environment change around you, and questions begin to arise from NPC’s, and yourself. Is their really any good guys amongst this world of soldiers, eco-terrorists and corrupt authority figures?
From then the game takes different directions, and things become problematic, specifically once you fade from the Avalanche crew.

Although the story still remains as engaging to a certain point, the experience takes a wayward nosedive. Side missions are introduced, and while you don't have to complete them, you feel the need to once characters start asking you to. This becomes a major issue because they are all so boring and stiff. The characters you talk to are all robotic, the dialogue seems overdramatised, and the reward itself just isn't worth it. The main aspect of buying a game for me is for immersion, and consistently I was being pulled from the experience because of lacklustre moments, and this is the same for most of the game. As I said, the opening to the story is a perfect way to begin your stay in Midgar, but once you drift away from the Avalanche crew, the story becomes stale. The game feels more like a twenty five hour experience rather than thirty five, and cutting certain sections would boost the story significantly. I understand wanting to add more and retain the great moments from the original, but sometimes cutting the fat can also be a good thing.

While moments in the original game could last around one hour, FFVIIR stretches it further to gain more insight into side characters and exploration. Don’t get wrong, it works in certain areas, for example Wall Market and Sector 7 as a whole are fantastic places to spend hours in, which I did. They burst with details that provide back story to their presence only thought about by the player. The slums are cramped, lifeless in colour, and shows the class divide within Midgar’s people.

However, in these moments they are only boosted further by the best feature of the game; Combat.

The combat is sublime, crunchy and weighty, and requires excellent skill the more you progress. Each of the protagonists has unique fighting styles, and customisation with materials gives you even more edge over your opponents. Fighting your standard monsters and creatures becomes a breeze once you know their weaknesses, but Boss fights are where the real challenge happens. Boss fights are the highlight of the entire game, especially the likes of a Giant House and the Final confrontation, and encapsulate the work and progression within the characters you play as. At first, I just wanted to play as Cloud, but knowing each characters skills, then switching between them to fight, and help other members of your party, becomes a juggling act thats so damn good. Speaking of which, our Heroes. At first, I thought I was dealing with generic anime characters who all boast the same attributes, and how wrong I was. Cloud is defensive, standoffish and blunt, who's primarily in the job for the money. Cloud is suffering, from what I can gather, with amnesia, and as the game’s questions begin to reveal the answers, he sets aside the hard edged exterior he carries with him, and opens up to warm to this band of wacky eco-terrorists. Even with this just being the first part of however many they are planning to release, Cloud is so interesting to me, a nut you want to crack and see what is inside, and his past becomes the focal point of the finale. He has become one of my favourite characters in a video game.

FFVIIR is a conundrum I only further want to figure out. Its both an incredible video game, but also bogged down with clear issues, which I personally feel either didn’t need to be in the game, or could of spent more time being fleshed out. Would I recommend it? Absolutely. Its a game I feel everyone should play, for gorgeous spectacle and mesmerising vision. I can’t wait for the second part.
  
Dodos Riding Dinos
Dodos Riding Dinos
2020 | Racing
Ahh dinosaurs. One of my favorite themes! What’s this? Dodos on top of dinosaurs? And they seem to be running away from something? Well now I’m just intrigued. Oh, they’re running from THE meteor and you are trying to sabotage your opponents so they get destroyed first, and this is a race to see who is destroyed last? Ok I’m in.

Dodos Riding Dinos is a hand management, dexterity, racing card game where if while you are playing it you don’t feel like you have portaled into a prehistoric Mario Kart board game, you have missed the point.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and I know the final components will be a little different from these shown (upgrades!). Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game. You are invited to download the rulebook, back the game through the Kickstarter campaign beginning April 28, 2020, purchase it from your FLGS, or through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T

To setup, lay out the board in the middle of the table. Randomly deal each player a Dodo/Dino team card, give them the corresponding team player dodineeple, and deal each six cards. Place the meteoreeple, eggeeple, and bananeeple (jeepers) within reach. Determine the starting player order, placing the dodineeples on the corresponding hexes behind the starting line. The game can now begin!

Dodos Riding Dinos is played over a series of rounds until one player has either surpassed the finish line or is the furthest past the finish line at the end of the round. To accomplish this, Dinos will be moved using the cards dealt at the beginning of the game and that are drawn from the deck during play. There are three colors (types) of cards: blue (normal), red (aggressive), and green (fast). During a round, players will choose a red or blue card to be played. Once all have chosen, the cards are revealed simultaneously. Whomever has the active player marker will resolve their card first, moving their dino the number shown on the top of the card and resolving any special abilities on the bottom of the card. The round will continue this way around the table until every player has resolved their card.

That is, unless two or more players have revealed red cards during the round. When this happens, these dinos are enraged and can only move, canceling out any special abilities printed on the bottom of the cards. If a red card gets through, however, get ready for the crux of the game.

Usually these cards are those that introduce the dexterity element of the game. If a card mentions throwing a banana “with a damage of 2,” then the player will grab the bananeeple, anchor their elbow to the table, and try to throw the banana onto their opponents with a wrist flick. Those that are hit will take 2 damage, where damage is discarding cards from their hand. Should a player enact a card involving throwing the eggeeple, the player will move their piece aside, place the egg there, and flick the egg to the opponents without the assistance of thumb resistance. And finally, the meteor. To unleash the meteor’s fury, the player will hold the meteoreeple in their fist, hold their arm parallel to the game board at least 1ft above the surface, and drop the meteoreeple onto unsuspecting foes causing massive damage.

Play continues in this fashion until only one player has crossed the finish line at the end of a round or the winner is the player who is furthest past the finish line when the round is over.

Components. Again, this is a prototype that was sent to us so I cannot rightfully comment on the quality of components, but I can on the art style and direction. So I really love the presentation of the components. The game is colorful, and the art is cartoony and super-quirky, a style of which I am always a fan. I’m excited to see how these components will be upgraded as a result of a successful Kickstarter campaign, but even as is, the game is gorgeous and the components are fun to handle.

It is probably no surprise that I love this one. It is super simple to learn, gives the players tons of choices per round, and perfecting the meteor drop or egg flick is going to take lots of plays, so that’s a big winner for me. I was telling the publisher that even though the box recommends ages 8+ to play, we were able to fashion some house rules to allow our 3 year old to play and have fun with it. Simply play open-handed, with no special dino abilities, and give them endless mulligans. Works for us, but the original rules are even better for adults.

So if you are a fan of games where dinosaurs are involved, or dodos, or animals riding other animals, or dexterity games, then definitely check out Dodos Riding Dinos on Kickstarter. I think that I will be backing the deluxe version because I’m a sucker for KS upgrades and content. It’s a great game as long as you don’t take yourself too seriously and just have a great time flicking eggs and meatball meeples at each other.