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The Bane Chronicles
The Bane Chronicles
8
8.2 (12 Ratings)
Book Rating
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The Bane Chronicles is a collection of short stories, all featuring the famous Warlock - Magnus Bane. Throughout the ages, we get to see him develop to the character that we know. We read more about the moments that made Magnus who he is today. 

I really enjoyed diving into this book, and I am glad I read it. Some stories I loved, some not so much, but I overall loved this book and will treasure it forever. It is written by Cassandra Clare, Sarah Rees Brennan and Maureen Johnson. <a href="https://diaryofdifference.com/2018/10/22/city-of-bones-the-mortal-instruments-1-by-cassandra-clare-book-review/">Read my review of City of Bones,</a> in case you are interested what I think about the first book of the Shadowhunter universe. 

<b><i>1. What Really Happened in Peru by Cassandra Clare and Sarah Rees Brennan - ★★★★ </i></b>

A perfect introduction of the Magnus we all love reading about. We witness a couple of adventures Magnus has in Peru. We meet Ragnor and Catarina and witness a few of Magnus’s love interests. I loved how the characters were written and the stories made me giggle. Especially the scene of how the town reacts to Magnus’ lack of talent to play an instrument.

<b><i>2. The Runaway Queen by Cassandra Clare and Maureen Johnson - ★★★★</i></b>

Set in Paris. Hot air balloon ride. Magnus decides to assist to get the Queen Marie Antoinette to escape Paris. He also has a quite interesting encounter with a bunch of vampires. Fast-faced and beautifully written. I love that it captured a certain period of history, and really focused to get the facts accurate for those times. 

<b><i>3. Vampires, Scones and Edmund Herondale by Cassandra Clare and Sarah Rees Brennan - ★★★★★</i></b>

Set in London. In this short story, Magnus realises how unfair the Shadowhunter laws are. And how the Nephilim have to obey them. When Edmund Herondale falls in love with a mundane, the Shadowhunters don’t care at all. He is stripped from his runes. For me, it was very emotional to watch Magnus fall in love, but sacrifice a few years of his happiness so Camille can give love to a werewolf, who will age and then eventually die. Also, the necklace he makes for her means so much and I can’t even cope! I loved the cryptic future prophecy in the end - I think it brought some emotion to the story. 

<b><i>4. The Midnight Heir by Cassandra Clare and Sarah Rees Brennan - ★★★★</i></b>

Very action-driven story, that didn’t leave me too impressed. I liked the fact that some important characters are featured, but it feels like the writing of the characters was poor. Set in London again, Magnus tries to help the Herondales. He also gets to meet Tatiana Blackthorn again. Magnus learns the hard way that even though he wants to help Shadowhunters, sometimes there’s nothing he can do. 

<b><i>5. The Rise of Hotel Dumort by Cassandra Clare and Maureen Johnson - ★★★★★</i></b>

Hotel Dumort in New York is quite a well-known place in the Shadowhunter universe. Warned by a vampire that danger is lurking, Magnus finds himself into another adventure. He helps the Shadowhunters again. And he also meets with a very old warlock, who opens up a portal to Hell. Magnus is called to go, possibly speaking to his father, before he finds the strength in him to close the portal. He helps a human forget and therefore prevents him from committing suicide. He also finds art that Camille is somehow involved with what happened. It kept me glued to my sofa in anticipation. 

<b><i>6. Saving Raphael Santiago by Cassandra Clare and Sarah Rees Brennan - ★★★★★</i></b>

Raphael is one of my dearest characters, I have to admit. He was turned into what he despised the most. He never would have chosen blood and immortality. The fact that Magnus is there to help him save himself is so powerful. I really enjoyed this short story! Very emotional!

<b><i>7. The Fall of the Hotel Dumort by Cassandra Clare and Maureen Johnson - ★★★★</i></b>

This is probably the most emotional story of them all. It also might be the most important one for Magnus’s character development. His relationship with Camille is brought back and he has to do something very scary and brave to be finally able to move on. 

<b><i>8. What to Buy the Shadowhunter Who Has Everything (And Who You’re Not Officially Dating Anyway) by Cassandra Clare and Sarah Rees Brennan - ★★★★</i></b>

Definitely the cutest story so far! Magnus and Alec are dating. It’s also Alec’s birthday and Magnus is thinking of a gift. Isabelle’s visit was also quite emotional to me. To see how much she cares for Alex and would be there for him. Also, the birthday gift that Magnus chooses in the end is too precious!

<b><i>9. The Last Stand of the New York Institute by Cassandra Clare, Sarah Rees Brennan and Maureen Johnson - ★★★★★</i></b>

A powerful story with a lot of Easter Eggs. We are reminded of the Circle and of a couple of fights. The Shadowhunters will help out the Downworlders against other Shadowhunters. We witness Valentine’s cruelty in a new light. And we read about Magnus meeting Jocelyn and Clary. 

<b><i>10. The Course of True Love (And First Dates) by Cassandra Clare - ★★★★★</i></b>

A story written only by Cassandra Clare. This story will probably be the most popular one, as it features Alec and Magnus on their first date. The writing is good and I really enjoyed how real the date was. It had all those awkward moments that I’ve experienced. Moments that help you get to know the person better than a few rehearsed questions. This short story shows how much Cassandra Clare knows her characters and cares for them, and it is very eminent to see the difference, compared to the rest of this book. 

<b><i>11. The Voicemail of Magnus Bane by Cassandra Clare, Sarah Rees Brennan and Maureen Johnson - ★★★★</i></b>

In this short story, we read a couple of interesting voicemails. They are all sent to Magnus, by different people, when he and Alec break up. It is emotional and humorous at the same time, as you see people react in different ways. Isabelle’s voicemails are pure passion and I love it. 

<b><i>The Bane Chronicles is a book I will cherish, for it introduced me to a side of Magnus I never knew. The Bane Chronicles is worth reading, especially if you are a fan of the Shadowhunter universe. I would recommend The Bane Chronicles to everyone that loves fantasy and magic.</i></b>

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Holi: Festival of Colors
Holi: Festival of Colors
2020 | Abstract Strategy, Puzzle
I absolutely love a beautiful game. Being a gamer, I have seen and played many gorgeous games. However, the first time I set up Holi: Festival of Colors (just Holi from here), both my 5 year old son and my slightly older mother-in-law both commented on how awesome it looked setup on the table. It has been a while since I last was so impressed by the sheer glamour of a game – and I only have the base retail version! I HAVE to get my hands on an upgrade pack or something… Just checked. I’ll have to buy the Deluxe version. Okay, placing order.

Holi is an abstract, area control, card-driven action selection (akin to Onitama) game for two to four players. In it, players are attendees at the Holi Festival and the goal is spread their favorite color onto the plaza and other players in order to increase their joy (earn VP). The winner is the player who is best able to throw their color and score joy, all while enjoying the festival!


To setup, the game owner will assemble the three-tiered board and place the appropriate sweets tokens on their spaces. The score track and Rivalry cards are set nearby so all can see. Each player receives their color’s player markers (in four delightful animal shapes), color tokens, color cards, and a helper card. The first player receives the cool lotus flower (I think) marker and the game may begin!
Holi is played over a series of turns, and continues until every player has either run out of color tokens or color cards to play. Each turn, players will take one to three actions in any order, with only one action being absolutely mandatory. This is the Throw Color action. In order to Throw Color, the active player will choose a color card from their hand of three cards to play. On these cards are indications of where a player’s marker/piece/animeeple must be located and the spaces near it to throw color tokens on the board. These color cards are reminiscent of those found in Onitama, where players may only move to specific spaces based on card grid iconography. Players will be littering the squares of the play area with their color tokens as well as attempting to hit other players’ animeeples with their color.

Players may also optionally Move at any point during the turn. This is an easy one: players may Move to any space on the current level of the board they are on, except any space inhabited by an opponent’s animeeple. These spaces could already contain sweets tokens, which can be collected by the player, or even color tokens. When a player lands in a space with their own color token, they take it back to their supply to be used again. However, landing on an opponent’s color token causes the active player to also take it into their supply, thus scoring the opponent points at the end of the game.

Finally, a player, if in a space surrounded on four edges by color tokens, may Climb Up to the next higher level. Players on the middle level will score 2 joy (VP) at the end of the game for each color token placed, while tokens on the top level will score 3 joy. Care should be taken when throwing color on the upper levels, because should an empty space reside on the level below where the token has been placed, the token will fall through to the lower level! Therefore, only color tokens will only remain placed on higher levels when another token is blocking its fall below it.


Once all players have played their cards and thrown their color tokens, the game is over and the score is tallied. 1 point is earned for each color token on the bottom level, 2 points for the middle level, and 3 points for tokens on the upper level. Players score 2 more points for each of their color tokens that found their way into opponents’ supplies. Remember those sweets tokens that players were collecting? Players will score 5 points for every player that has less sweets tokens at the end of the game. If playing with the Rivalry cards, points are also scored for any of their special circumstances (ie color tokens scoring 4 instead of 3 on the top level, or hitting opponents with colors score 2 points immediately instead of the normal 1 point, or even 10 bonus points to the player with the most color tokens on the bottom level). The player with the most points at the end of this scoring phase wins the game!
Components. I kind of already made my point about this game being a flat out stunner on the table. I will sing its praises from here to India and then back again. I normally acknowledge the artist(s) on a game once I open it for the first time, but seeing that this is a total Vincent Dutrait masterpiece, I just had to see which other games of his I own. I have made my claims in the past for my favorite board game artists and I had not included Dutrait. No more. This is brilliant and just a wonderful experience throughout. The components are all great, and that multi-layered board? I mean, come on! The intricacies found throughout and within this box are immeasurable, and I will surely be adding the Deluxe version to my collection.

Holi is a game I can pull out with almost any person or group of people and feel confident that it will give an extremely satisfying experience. The rules are relatively simple, and games are very quick. This is not a filler, but runs so smoothly and briskly that one may miscategorize it as such. The options of movement are so unrestricted, and having the ability to craft spatial situations with the cards in your hand to allow only your animeeple to climb up to the next level is just delicious. Speaking of, the sweets tokens, and really ALL of the components, are just so cute and well-illustrated. I really am finding it difficult to point out any flaws in this game. Every time I have played it I have simply had the best time with my opponents. Yeah, there’s some minor take that, but it’s all in good fun, and if you know anything about the actual celebration of Holi, participants relish coming home just covered head to toe in paint, colored water, and other colorful materials. It’s a great theme that shines through, and I look forward to each of my coming plays.

Currently, eight games we have published reviews for have earned the Golden Feather Award. At the time of this writing, I know one other will be joining that list soon, and now Holi will as well. So that is 10 total games over the 495 we have published and are sitting in queue to be published. That said, it is no surprise, I’m sure, that Holi has earned its spot among the best we have played, and I am incredibly relieved that I was able to grab a copy when I did. This will remain a favorite of mine for many years, I know it. If you are like me and appreciate an amazing production value with a comparably wonderful game underneath, then you owe it to yourself to pick up a copy of Holi as soon as you can. Or come play my copy with me. I will always be up for a play.
  
On the Rocks
On the Rocks
2021 | Dice Game
I have to come clean right at the top of this one. I have not really tried a whole lot of different cocktails in my life. I have been mostly a beer kind of guy. Not that I am opposed to cocktails at all – in fact, I have really enjoyed most of the drinks I have tried. That said, I wish I was more hip so I would know all the drink lingo and really know why someone would want their concoction shaken and not stirred. So, I went into this one thinking I would learn the secret finally. But I didn’t. I did have a good time playing it though.

“On the Rocks is a marble drafting, cocktail recipe fulfillment game for 1-4 players. It is NOT a drinking game.” – straight from the game’s BGG page. So what does that mean? Well, this one is a variation of the “I cut, you choose” style game, but HEAVILY themed around bartending and enhanced with additional fun mechanics. The winner is the player who amasses the most amount of money by the end of their shift.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup, consult the rulebook, as there are many steps. However, once setup, the game should look similar to the photo below. Choose the starting player and the mixology competition can begin!
On the Rocks is played over several rounds with each player completing specific steps. The first step is optional, and is Tip Cards. Players will accumulate Tip Cards throughout the game, and each one features a special ability that may be used at this time. The next step may also be optional, depending on if the active player had received a Complaint card previously. Complaints must be completed on this step and is pretty much a wrench thrown in the plans by competitors.

Once these (possibly) optional steps have been completed the active player then takes the 2d6 and Rolls them. This number determines how many ingredient marbles are to be pulled from the bag and added into play. For the cost of one ingredient marble, the active player may manipulate the rolled dice by flipping it to its opposite face. Next, the player will Draft the number of marbles from the bag they rolled in the previous step. From these drafted marbles the player will Mix them into the blue Jigger Bowls in the middle of the table one at a time, a la Mancala (oh that’s fun to say: A LA MANCALA!). Then the player will Select & Place a jigger of marbles from the table onto their player board. Placing the corresponding marbles onto the drinks is how recipes can be completed. If any ingredients were selected from the jigger but not placed, the player must then place the ingredients into the Extra Ingredients shot glasses on the top portion of the player board, to Save for later use.

When the ingredient marbles have been placed and saved, the player must then complete the Resolve step. Several ingredient marbles are “Premium” or “Spill” marbles. Premium marbles (golden) allow the player to select ANY two ingredients from the draw bag and the Premium marble is then discarded to the coaster in the middle of the table. The black Spill marble forces the active player to draw a Spill card from the deck and complete its action. It also during the Resolve step that the player may complete a recipe card by discarding the drink’s ingredients to the bag and flipping its recipe card face-down. If the entire order (all of the face-up recipe cards) is completed, the active player’s round ends and they notate this by placing one of the three lemon tokens on their player board. Some round end cleanup is performed, like drawing another set of 3 or 4 drink recipes for an order, and the player’s turn is over.


Once a player has completed their third order of drinks, they must indicate “Last Call” to the other players at the table. This informs the other players that they have one last turn to earn any extra money before the game ends. When the game has been finished, final scoring is performed and the winner is they who earned the most money throughout the night. The other players must immediately fix the winner a drink, or buy the winner a shot. Okay, those aren’t in the rulebook, but merely suggestions for the revised second edition…
Components. For those that follow our reviews, you know I am a sucker for games with great components, and this one definitely delivers for me. The aesthetics and art style are just perfect, the double-layer boards are always lovely, and the rubber jiggers are excellent. I cannot see anything that can be improved in terms of components, and I completely expected that because this was published by Pentree Games and 25th Century Games (one of my favorite publishers in the business). The game looks and feels deluxe, which is VERY satisfying.

I think that the Pittre duo of Michael and Christina really knocked it out of the park with this one. Wait, this is their first game design?? And it’s incredible? Okay okay, I’ll be keeping my eye on you two. On the Rocks is a light game with excellent table presence and some difficult choices presented. Now, the choices may be TOOOOOO difficult for some gamers, especially our AP-prone players. Carefully planning out each ingredient’s distribution into the jigger bowls can send them into a frenzy, so I have advised to choose one or two bowls they wish to buff and concentrate on hitting those with the marbles they want, and just randomly place the other ingredients. I know that is a big ask, but this game is supposed to take 45-90 minutes, not 45-90 hours. My other gripe about the game is the color-dependence of the ingredient marbles. I am sorry to all my colorblind friends out there, but I am unable to see how you might keep a possible 12 different marbles straight in your heads while simultaneously remembering the state of marbles in each jigger bowl. I hope I am completely wrong, as I do not suffer from colorblindness, and please do let me know if this is still playable for those gamers.

These gripes aside, everything else about the game is fabulous. I love being able to manipulate my dice rolls (yes, with a cost) to have ultimate control of the number of marbles pulled from the bag. That bag, however, takes control away immediately unless I draft a bunch of clear (wild) or golden marbles to affect my final placements. I also adore struggling to choose which recipes to concentrate on first, and weighing the possibilities of completing the higher value recipes, or blitzing the smaller ones first.

Oh, and the Spills cards? They can be real pains in the booty. These effectively give the active player the ability to completely botch another players’ plans by discarding their ingredient marbles from their player board. Not enough player interaction? How about negative Tip cards, which are earned by completing a recipe, that impede a competitor’s progress by making them complete the Tip card before being able to move on with their plans, or by limiting their marble selection to two instead of the entire bowl? Yeah, this has player interaction for sure.

Again, I like a good drink now and then, just as much as the next person. However, I have never been a bartender, and I do not plan on ever becoming one. I could not ever imagine having to compete with other bartenders for tip money either, especially if it is as brutally cutthroat as On the Rocks portrays it to be. I will, however, play a game where all that “fun” is diluted to dice, cards, and marbles. I was looking through my collection recently and noticed have embarrassingly few games with an adult beverage theme. If you are like me and require more games depicting fun with alcohol, then I strongly urge you to check out On the Rocks. I feel like I can finally graduate from Fuzzy Navels and Stone Sours just by playing this game and really upping my liquor acumen. Purple Phoenix Games gives this one a delicious 5 / 6. It seems readily available for consumption, but please do not try to go drink for drink with this game. It’s not designed to be a drinking game… or is it?
  
The Grey Bastards
The Grey Bastards
Jonathan French | 2018 | Science Fiction/Fantasy
10
8.5 (4 Ratings)
Book Rating
world-building, dirty language, character growth (0 more)
Shelf Life – The Grey Bastards Exemplifies Grimdark Fantasy at Its Damn Finest
Contains spoilers, click to show
The Grey Bastards is a fun, foul-mouthed read. If you’re turned off by bad language, steamy sex, or a good plot with plenty of action and twists, then this book isn’t for you. The Grey Bastards falls into the fantasy sub-genre known as grimdark. Where high fantasy has your Tolkien beautiful and noble elves, dwarves, humans, and wizards with epic battles between good and evil, grimdark takes all of that and covers it in shit, pus, and blood. Notice how in high fantasy nobody ever takes a piss or fucks? In grimdark, everyone does.

But don’t be fooled into thinking this book will be any less intelligent, epic, or heartfelt for it. The Grey Bastards is all of that and more. The novel follows Jackal, a half-breed orc living in the Lot Lands, the barren desert wasteland of Hispartha. He is a Grey Bastard, one of many half-orc hoofs, each protecting its own small town in the Lots. Members of a hoof are elite warriors that ride out on their Barbarians—giant warthogs—and slaughter invading bands of orcs.

Hispartha is a vibrant world, with a mix of fantastical species (orcs, half-orcs, elves, humans, halflings, and centaurs) with unique cultures and religions. Hispartha itself takes influences from Reconquista Spain, which is especially noticeable in the nomenclature, geography, and architecture.
The primarily atheistic half-orcs recently won their freedom from slavery at the hands of humans. Humans treat the half-orcs like second-class citizens, but tolerate them because of their strength, using them as a shield from the orcs. The elves are beautiful, reclusive, and probably the most cliché; there is one important elf character, but for the most part, we don’t get a good look into their culture in the first book. The centaurs worship Romanesque deities and go on crazed, Bacchanalian killing sprees during the blood moon.

Besides the half-orcs, the halflings are perhaps the most interesting. I still have a hard time visualizing them, trying to figure out if they are thin, pixie-like creatures or more stocky like dwarves. Their small stature and black skin makes me think of pygmies. They worship a god they expect will reincarnate someday, (view spoiler)

One thing that has always annoyed me about fantasy is that many authors feel that the characters of their world, being pre-industrial and thus “medieval,” must all be white, straight, Christian (or proto-Christian), cisgender males. If a woman appears at all is to act as the damsel, prize, or, if she’s lucky, a mystical enchantress to guide the heroes or provide a maguffin. It has come to the point in which this has become a tired and accepted baseline for fantasy. I don’t necessarily think that these fantasy authors are intentionally trying to be uninclusive, so much as they just seem to forget that other groups of people can exist in fantasy thanks to its fathers, Tolkien and Lewis.

But enough with my rant, the purpose of which is to highlight why I am often drawn to grimdark fantasy: at the very least I know that women, people of color, lgbt people, and other religions will be present, even if they are often victimized. This is because grimdark fantasy honestly depicts the horrors of rape, war, murder, slavery, and racism (or rather, speciesism in most cases) and has heroes and villains that are morally grey.

However, many authors describe these atrocities and then leave it at that, assuming that simply depicting them is enough to make a book mature and meaningful. They often fail to make any sort of statement on evil, and thus can seem to be, at best, blindly accepting it and, at worst, glorifying it (this often happens in the cases of magnificent bastard characters, who are absolute monsters but are so charming you almost respect or like them).

Jonathan French, however, does not fall short of the mark as many authors do, and for two main reasons: humor and humanity.

Let’s start with the humor. This book is hilarious. I mean in the I literally laughed out loud while reading it way. Sure, the jokes are often crass, but I have a dirty mind, so inappropriate humor is my favorite kind. The dialogue is especially top-notch, and the interactions between Jackal and his friends Fetching and Oats feel genuine, full of in-jokes, insults, and sexually-charged humor, all of which are exactly how I interact with my own close friends. And every major character in this book is so damn witty that I’m honestly jealous of them. If I could be quick enough to make even one of their zingers at the right time in a conversation, I would feel proud of myself for the rest of the day.

Humor is necessary to prevent any grimdark fantasy from becoming too over-the-top or depressing. And honestly, humor is needed most when the world is a dark and frightening place. But too much humor could accidentally downplay the point of grimdark: the brutally honest depiction of the atrocities that people are capable of.

And this is where it is important to have an element of humanity. By this I mean that the “good guys” must make some action or statement on those atrocities. Too often I read or watch hardened badass characters with no emotion who can watch a person get tortured and killed without flinching (maybe even do it themselves) and who never stop to question the nature of their society (even as part of their character growth), and I have difficulty finding them at all relatable or even the least bit interesting.

Now, often for this type of character, he or she is dead inside as a coping mechanism and part of their character arc is learning to allow themselves to feel their repressed emotions: heartbreak, anger, fear, etc. This can be done very well (see The Hunger Games for a great example—dystopian scifi and grimdark fantasy have very similar undertones). But most times it just ends up falling flat.

But Jackal already starts out with more personality than most grimdark protagonists. He is a humorous and light-hearted person. Sure, he lives in a desert wasteland, his race is entirely created by rape, he’s treated as a second-class citizen, and his life and the lives of those around him are in constant danger of rape and/or murder by invading orcs or blood-crazed centaurs. But despite all of that, he still has a sense of humor, people he loves, a community, ambitions, moral code, and all of the other things that these protagonists are often lacking.

Don’t get me wrong, he can be an asshole, and he’s often acts rashly before he thinks. But the scene that really stuck with me the most was [when Jackal and the wizard Crafty come across an unconscious elf sex-slave. I was expecting him to say something along the lines of “There’s nothing we can do for her, we have to save ourselves” or “This isn’t any of our business” or “It would be best to just put her out of her mercy.” These are the typical lines that a grimdark protagonist might utter while their companion—accused of being a bleeding heart—frees the slave. But this was not the case. Jackal and Crafty both immediately set out to free the girl and steal her away from her owner, despite the danger to themselves. And when he comes across an entire castle-full of these women, Jackal again sets about freeing them without a moment’s hesitation. (hide spoiler)]

And it’s no surprise that Jackal has a serious problem with rape. As I’ve mentioned before, half-orcs are entirely the product of roving bands of orcs raping human, elven, or even half-orc women. [When Jackal learns that Starling, the elf slave he rescued, is pregnant with a half-orc baby, he is not only furious with the orcs that gang-raped her, but also disturbed by the fact that elven society shuns any of their women who have been raped, and that these victims often end up taking their own lives rather than give birth to an impure half-elf. (hide spoiler)]

Furthermore, Jackal, unlike many people in Hispartha, does not buy into misogyny or sexism. His best friend Fetching is the first female half-orc to have joined a group of riders. Not only does Jackal respect Fetching, he understands the emotional turmoil that she is dealing with being the first female rider and how she overcompensates as a result to earn the respect of the other men.

While there is quite a bit of speciesism (pretty much none of the species get along with one another), the inhabitants of Hispartha come in every skin color and nobody gives a damn. Furthermore, sexuality is primarily treated as each person’s individual preference and nobody else’s business. While characters may make jokes about acting “backy” (gay), these are made in good humor between friends, and nobody gets particularly offended by them. Fetching is herself openly bisexual (though she seems to suppress her heterosexual desires more than her homosexual ones out of that same need to be “one of the boys”), and Oats and Jackal are one of my favorite bromantic pairings.

Grimdark fantasy can often be depressing to read. But Jonathan French does an excellent job of infusing hope into his narrative. The story actually has a happier ending than I was expecting. [I was especially pleased when Jackal chooses Fetching to be the new leader of the hoof (she is voted in unanimously by the other riders). I find it incredibly annoying in books and movies when revolutionaries/usurpers decide to appoint themselves leaders, as the former does not qualify you for the latter. Part of Jackal’s arc is realizing that he is not meant to lead the hoof like he’d once desired. (hide spoiler)]

For the sequel, The True Bastards, I’m hoping to see [if a cure can be found for the thrice-blood child now infected with plague, how Fetching is doing leading the hoof, and what the mysterious Starling is up to (I don’t buy for a second that she’s killed herself). And of course, I fully expect that Jackal is going to have to fulfill his empty promise to the halfling’s resurrected god, Belico.
  
Love, Death &amp; Robots
Love, Death & Robots
2019 | Action, Animation, Comedy
CGI is amazing (1 more)
The Perfect Mix of Morbid Humour and Gore
The episodes are so short! (0 more)
A Masterpiece of the Weird and Fantastical
This is going to be a long one, I'm going to review each episode as they aren't linked or related in any way, but just know, they are all gorgeous works of art and you should totally go watch the whole thing ?.


Beyond the Aquila Rift - CGI was beautiful from the moment it started, I was like 'shiiiit this series is going to be everything I love'. This one is about a crew making a delivery in space, however nothing quite goes to plan. For me, it had a very 'Mass Effect' feel with the FTL travel. I was not expecting a full out sex scene in the first 6 minutes but then again the episodes are on average only 16 minutes long. It was rauncy yet somehow, still quite tasteful, but as with most animated stuff there was an excessive amount of topless boob shots. I won't spoil it, but it ended up as a horrific mind fuck that left a shiver down my spine ?.

Secret War - Again, CGI was epic and the story was the perfect mix of unsettling, gory, and tragic. It follows a platoon of Red Army soldiers who are hunting down mysterious 'monsters'. There's blood, there's guts, a guy has an arm off at one point - what more could you ask for?

Sonnie's Edge - Immediately feels hellishly grunge and rave. I absolutely adored the blacklight effects and a strong female styling, the fight is gorgeous, the monsters have almost a Kaju feel which really made me happy as I love Pacific Rim. Of course this epicness is immediately ruined by a sloppy scene (I won't spoil it) which cemented the fact in my mind this was written by a man (I checked later and found I was correct), it does save itself with a fantastic twist at the end though so it was still an amazing short.

Sucker of Souls - This had a great grungy cartooning that felt half Kill Bill, half 2003 TMNT. It ended up being a real bad day for an archaeological expedition. Gore injected with humour is always a favourite of mine and this ticked all those boxes, including a wisecracking explosives expert (looking at you Gary!) If we've learnt anything from Indiana Jones and Rick O'Connell it's, don't fuck with tombs. This time was no different.

Three Robots - There's something just so fucking fantastic about robots going on holiday and speculating about 'human' stuff. It's just the perfect injection of morbid humour and I love it. The twist at the end had me laughing harder than I had any right to ?.

Ice Age - I haven't seen Topher Grace since That 70's Show so I was like 'heeeey cool'. This was the first one that wasn't soley animation so that was really cool. They find a civilization in their freezer - yes, you read that right, their freezer - and the story is awesome ?. It's a neat reflection on humans and our place in the world.

The Witness - Set in a brightly coloured city the animation here feels very Borderlands-y, which is super cool because I fricking love that game ?. There's murder, full frontal nudity, erotic dancing, and an ending that will tear your head right off. Pretty neat all in all.

Suits - Great Googamooga, this is my absolutely favourite so far, a perfectly normal looking farm, complete with adorable hick accents, discovers a breach in their fence. This isn't just any breach, this is an alien style swarm complete with Mech Warrior suits and a woman named Mel, who I'm convinced is Tank Girl as an old lady. 17 minutes of utter badassery you do not want to miss. Utterly LOVED it, and would 10/10 watch this as its own series.

When the Yogurt Took Over - Ok so the name - I was like 'should I take this seriously? Oooor' ?. Weirdly serious - yet hysterical. A five minute journey into what happened when Yogurt became sentient. You will not be disaappointed ?.

Good Hunting - With animation that reminds me of The Last Airbender, it's a story of magic, friendship, and the industrial age. A beautiful and tragic story, with horrific overtones of what greed and 'progress' can do.

The Dump - The animation this reminds me of would be sorta like, if the people at Pixar got high with Tim Burton. There was one random thing - I found Pearly's dick swing in the wind much funnier than any sane person probably would ?. A great story about man's best friend and let me tell ya, everyone needs an Otto ❤.

Shape-Shifter - There's something so deeply interesting about putting the supernatural into regular life. Two men, who are not human, in the US marines. Insanely intense story for under 15 minutes. Gorgeous CGI work too.

Helping Hand - This had a great "Gravity" feel to it, when everything goes wrong you just keep going, give a little and then a little more and you achieve the impossible. Breathtaking space visuals is just an added bonus ?.

Fish Night - Telltale style animation, depicts a story of a father and son on the road. The car breaks down and something both magical and tragic happens. The ending left me reeling ?.

Lucky 13 - The CGI in this one was so good it took me half the time to figure out that it wasn't real. Lucky 13 was to Cutter like the Normandy was to Joker. Just - the best goddamn ship ❤.

Zima Blues - Animated in a style similiar to Archer, this was an interesting piece about art and how it effects us, we search for meaning through it sometimes it's about appreciating the little things ❤.

Blindspot - 90's animation and a rad story about robots. This is my second favourite after Suits, would 10/10 watch as its own movie ?.

Alternate Histories - Did not stop laughing the entire time. Utter gold. I will recommend one thing - pause it at the blue screen bit, you won't be disappointed ?.

The only thing I'm sad about is there wasn't more of this to watch, it was incredible ?.
  
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Daniel Boyd (1066 KP) Apr 22, 2019

Really enjoyed reading through your individual reviews, agree with you 1000% about Sonnie's Edge

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Emma @ The Movies (1786 KP) rated Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019) in Movies

Jun 22, 2019 (Updated Sep 25, 2019)  
Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)
Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)
2019 | Action, Adventure, Fantasy
Five years after Godzilla saved us from the MUTO attack the world (or some of it at least) wants to see an end to the potential threat of the Titans. Monarch are studying them and hiding them away from the world, but there are calls to destroy the monsters before more devastation befalls the planet?

Dr Emma Russell has developed the Orca, a device that communicates with the Titans and can be used to calm them and stop any further destruction. Not everyone has the same idea about how to use the Orca though and it's taken, along with Dr Russell and her daughter Madison, after its successful test run. The race is on to recover the device and avert the impending crisis.

Godzilla is one of my favourite monsters. For years the 1998 film with Matthew Broderick and Jean Reno in it was one of my favourite films. I also love the "proper" Godzilla movies where they destroy Tokyo at every given opportunity. To have new films felt like a wonderful thing... until I saw 2014 Godzilla. I rewatched it before going to see King Of The Monsters and I remembered how underwhelmed I was. The characters didn't grab me and I found the whole thing uninspiring. The prospect of a second wasn't great, but then I saw the trailers, they were spectacular.

I really enjoyed this and went to see it again in 3D, a much more peaceful screening than the first viewing. The girl who was sitting a couple of seats away was animatedly jumping at every opportunity, her reaction was far scarier than anything that happened on the screen.

This was much improved on the last instalment. I loved that it embraced the original films and the fact that it switched its focus more to the monsters than the humans. You go to a monster movie to see monsters, and Godzilla 2014 felt like it had forgotten that fact.

If I had to describe this film to someone I'd say it was a combination of Infinity War and Jurassic Park, just with slightly larger monsters... yep, I'm fairly happy with that comparison. I may have been imagining it but I felt like there were a few nods to JP jumbled in there... maybe that's just me.

There's a collection of recognisable faces in the cast and I don't think there's a single person who underperforms. I thought that Millie Bobby Brown gave a great performance as Madison, she managed to give us a child character that wasn't particularly annoying, which may actually be a first in creature features.

Charles Dance makes an excellent bad guy, there's something about his look, a cross between a vampire and the restaurant critic from Ratatouille that works for me. He also gets to have a great moment of silent humour with Brown when they're in a lift together, it was very unexpected for their potential on-screen relationship.

We get to see four of our Titans in this movie as main players. Godzilla, obvs, Mothra, Rodan and Monster Zero, or King Ghidorah to his friends. The sheer scale they've gone to is amazing, and I thought the way they were created with their individual traits was beautiful. The one drawback to the beautiful glowing monster bodies is that the scenes have to be fairly dark to appreciate that aspect. They manage to use those aspects of the creatures to give the extra lighting the scenes need meaning that you get something that's both dark and scary as well as light and hopeful. The colours were something that really stood out to me in the advertising, the lightness of the blue and green against the anger of the orange and yellow, it shows the good and evil relationship really well.

The size of the creatures is mad and sometimes a little impossible to gauge, we get a few moments where we're given some perspective with man-made structures but they do a good job of trying to get it across in basic visual techniques too. You see a lot of them from "human" angles, from the ground running, from buildings and vehicles. It feels like an exercise in shock and awe and takes you back to Dr Serizawa's point at the beginning of the film that we're Godzilla's pets, it's not the other way around.

The effects/animation looked solid, at no point did I see anything on-screen that drew my attention away from the action. One moment in particular stood out and that was a large explosion somewhere in the middle of the movie. It was given an old fashioned kind of a look and it gave me the impression that they'd really looked at things that had come before it for inspiration.

You have to obviously accept the facts that in these sorts of films, parents will willingly put their children in immense danger, bad guys will always have prepared a short video presentation to explain their motivations and just because there's destruction happening all around you does not mean you will die. It's got all the classic monster/disaster movie moments that you love to hate in it. "Movie Reality" is awesome.

If you couldn't already tell, I loved this. Much improvement from the last instalment and an entertaining action-packed addition to the monsterverse. Oscar winner? Probably not. Entertaining escapism? Most definitely. I am a little concerned about how the story will progress from here. They had plenty of scope for lots of movies after some of the things they showed in the film, but the events of KotM mean that there's little room to move with it all, we'll have to see what happens in Godzilla Vs Kong next year.

What you should do

This really deserves to be seen on the big screen. The sound and the effects combine to make some great viewing.

Movie thing you wish you could take home

If they could adapt the Orca for human use I'd be interested.
  
Romanov
Romanov
Nadine Brandes | 2019 | Fiction & Poetry, Science Fiction/Fantasy
8
7.8 (6 Ratings)
Book Rating
From the author of Fawkes comes a magical take on the story of Anastasia Romanov.

The history books say I died.

  They don’t know the half of it.

Ever since I read Fawkes, I knew I loved Nadine’s writing, and when Romanov was announced, I couldn’t be happier. As I have spend my childhood and young adult life in the Balkans, whilst travelling across Europe, I have always admired Russia, and always enjoyed reading all the theories about the Romanov family.

As a child I would be told stories and fairy tales, I would watch the Disney adaptation of Anastasia, and as I was growing up, I would read history books and fiction on this very subject. When I got my hands on ‘’Romanov’’, I knew I would be up for an adventure, with lots of expectations, but what I never knew was that I would be blown away of how beautiful this book is!

This book is split into two main parts, before and after the Romanov’s execution, but it is also split into the first being the historical part, and the second being the fictional part. Both parts of the book are quite intense, and very different emotions come up to surface, but they are both very powerful throughout, and fitted together quite well.

In the first part, we are introduced to the Romanov family, and how they are kept as hostages by the Bolsheviks. It would’ve been much better if we had more details on the pre-hostage period, why the revolution began, why the king abducted the throne, who are the Bolsheviks and what they believed in. The book starts in the middle of this whole situation, and whilst I knew the beginning before, I am certain a lot of people wouldn’t have.

The history, as much accurate as it was, also had a personalized feeling that the author wanted to give. I have to admit, a lot of the details, especially around the family were quite accurate. The family did stick together and loved each other, they did have secrets and they did make friends with their captors. Anastasia’s brother did indeed had hemophilia and Rasputin was allegedly helping him. However, the author decided to put her personal feelings into the history as well. The king is presented as a wonderful leader that cares about the people. I understand that we see this story from Anastasia’s point of view, and as his daughter, she is supposed to see her father as the best figure in the world. But I still believe this part should be more objective, if not from Anastasia’s point of view, then at least by the king’s actions and dialogues. The other big element that bothered me was the portrayal of Rasputin. He is shown in this book as a family helper and a kind man, when in fact, he was far from that. In the history books, he is described as a madman, a creepy person, and the king was not happy of him coming in the house. The family’s secrecy and the queen’s silent domination over the king, together with Rasputin’s doings were the start of the revolution, and I believe that it one of the required truths that this books should have included, but didn’t. And that troubled me.

On top of this, is the Russian language used throughout this book. There were a lot of spelling errors, and misinterpretations. And whilst I can understand these words, many people can’t, and translation wasn’t provided in the book. Also, I really found this quote interesting, talking about the Russian culture, and how they don’t show emotions. Just a note – this is most of the time true, people won’t be nice to strangers, but actually, Russian people are quite friendly and emotional as well.

‘’We Russians weren’t required to share any amount of emotion we didn’t want to.’’

Apart from these few things that slightly bothered me, I really enjoyed this book. Anastasia is an amazing character, and through her we can see her love towards her family, her country, and even towards the people that wish her harm. We get to see her love, cry, be hurt, be afraid, forgive, and grow throughout the book, and her journey was magical.

‘’As I lay in the grass next to the spell that could rid me of heart pain, I realized that a part of forgiveness was accepting the things someone had done – and the pain that came with that – and moving on with love. Forgiveness was a personal battle that must always be fought in my heart.’’

I loved the beginning of the book the most. The setting was well-written, and I got the feel the same way as the Romanov family did. They tried to act as if everything was normal, when in fact, they were held captive, and moved out of their home. They weren’t allowed to go out in the garden often, and when they did have this opportunity, they enjoyed every single second of it. And they all had hope every single day. They kept smiling and stayed together.

There are number of scenes that will always stay close to my heart – the relationship between Zash and Anastasia (as unrealistic as it might be), always kept me on my toes, his desperation, and his guilt, and her ability to forgive and love regardless.

The brother’s illness, and his persistence through it. His motivation and his will to never give up. The love he holds for his family, and especially his sister Anastasia, and the toughness and not letting go. A few scenes were unrealistic with him, as I hardly believe anyone suffering from hemophilia can survive all those injuries mentioned in the book and the pools of blood, but above all – this character did achieve what he was meant to do – show hope where there is none.

A wonderful and magical tale, with a history behind it of a mysterious family, especially their end – this book brought tears on my eyes and made me think about the power of forgiveness and love. A true masterpiece.

Thank you to Nadine Brandes, for letting me be a part of her Ninja Team.
  
The Suicide Squad (2021)
The Suicide Squad (2021)
2021 | Action, Comedy, Crime
Its adult humor is also incredibly poignant (2 more)
Blood and gore is Troma levels of insanity
King Shark and Polka Dot Man
Not as fun on repeat viewings (1 more)
Is a little too similar to Guardians of the Galaxy
I'm a Motherf@#$ing Superhero!
You could probably get away with calling James Gunn’s The Suicide Squad an R-rated version of Guardians of the Galaxy, but it isn’t entirely fair or correct. It’s a complicated comparison much like Gunn’s status with Marvel Studios that allowed him to make the film in the first place and whether or not The Suicide Squad is a sequel or a reboot to David Ayer’s 2016 film.

Gunn has always had a knack for getting gory or gross or raunchy if the opportunity presented itself. The Suicide Squad almost feels like a clean, strike that, blood-splattered slate for the filmmaker. Gunn had complete creative control while making The Suicide Squad and it shows; not only in its graphic content and excessive vulgarity, but also in the characters Gunn chose to be in the film. Nearly everyone has been replaced from the previous Suicide Squad film except for Captain Boomerang (Jai Courtney), Colonel Rick Flagg (Joel Kinnaman), Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie), and Amanda Waller (Viola Davis). The new characters are mostly unknown or barely known villains, which makes the fact that nearly all of them are expendable all the more intriguing.

While Guardians of the Galaxy and The Suicide Squad are two different films, there are some undeniable similarities. The cast of The Suicide Squad is insanely stacked, but you have to know by now that three quarters of these characters die in horribly gruesome ways. Witnessing who lives and who dies is half the fun of the film, so that won’t be spoiled here. But The Suicide Squad has a team of five characters that are grouped together and featured more than anyone else. It’s a lot like how Guardians began with Star-Lord, Gamora, Drax, Rocket, and Groot. These five characters also end up being the ones you love the most.

Gunn also has a thing for taking a group of assholes and giving them meaning. In the tenth season of South Park, Eric Cartman meets Bart Simpson face to face. Bart has always been a troublemaker and a prankster, but Cartman ground up Scott Tenorman’s parents, slapped that ground parent meat in some chili, and made Scott eat his own parents. The comparison between Guardians and The Suicide Squad is a lot like the difference between Bart Simpson and Eric Cartman. The Suicide Squad features straight up murderers, demented psychopaths, and whatever the hell Weasel is.

Not unlike his other comic book film work though, Gunn typically takes what would be unlikable characters on their own and finds a purpose for them once they’re with other outcasts that they can relate to. There is a ton of heart in The Suicide Squad. You fall in love with King Shark because he’s trying to read books upside down and use one of his fingers as mustache as a brilliant disguise, but you don’t feel for him until he reveals that he’s never had a friend. Sebastian, Ratcatcher II’s go-to rat, is adorable because he waves at, offers leaves to, and flocks toward Bloodsport even though he’s afraid of rats. There’s still this camaraderie in The Suicide Squad. It may be broken and gory, but it’s still camaraderie.

There are some unusual choices that Gunn made with The Suicide Squad though. They originally wanted Will Smith to come back as Deadshot, but supposedly cast Idris Elba to replace Smith in the role. Then they backtracked and made Elba Bloodsport. The odd thing is that both Bloodsport and Peacemaker are exactly the same as Deadshot. Peacemaker seems to be a bit crazier, but both characters have a thing for making anything a weapon in their hands and having precise aim. Bloodsport is even doing everything in the film for the sake of his daughter. It gives Warner Bros a chance to bring Smith back as Deadshot down the line, but having all three characters in the same film would be serious overkill.

Harley Quinn’s action sequences in The Suicide Squad are better and more satisfying than anything Margot Robbie has done with the role. Polka Dot Man is low-key the coolest character of the film despite seeing his mom in every person that he meets. Many will likely point to the blood, the gore, and all of the F-bombs shouted mostly among teammates as Gunn cleansing his Marvel/Disney palette so to speak. However, the major difference is Starro. Starro is a giant blue and purple starfish with an eyeball in the middle of his body. He is essentially a kaiju, but he shoots miniature versions of himself out of his armpits which latch onto people’s faces, kills them, and turns their corpses into zombie-like slaves that do his bidding; all while Starro gets bigger and bigger in the process. The abridged version of this starfish heavy explanation is that Starro is fucking terrifying. The entire world is basically on the verge of bowing down to a Godzilla sized starfish that has the ability to shoot armies of himself out of his Goddamn armpits! The MCU featuring a monster or creature of any kind that is that scary is slim to none.

The Suicide Squad is an uproarious extravaganza filled with grotesque nom-noms, full-on naked dick shots, and John Cena in tighty-whities and it’s is the most fun you’ll have with an R-rated comic book film in a theater (or at home with HBO Max) since Deadpool. It’s the first comic book film to come along in a good long while that’s charming because of how weird it is. As a final note, stay/watch after the credits. James Gunn and John Cena are doing an 8-episode Peacemaker TV series for HBO Max due sometime in 2022, so that may or may not be teased in some capacity.
  
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Dana (24 KP) rated Crooked Kingdom in Books

Mar 23, 2018  
Crooked Kingdom
Crooked Kingdom
Leigh Bardugo | 2016 | Science Fiction/Fantasy, Young Adult (YA)
10
9.1 (22 Ratings)
Book Rating
This post will 100% be full of spoilers for both the first book and this book, so if you have not read either, please leave the post now, because you need to read this series. The review will be here when you get back, I promise.

Can I just say that Leigh Bardugo is a phenomenal writer? I just want to put that out there first, so we can move on to some more interesting stuff, but damn. That woman is a genius when it comes to the written word! Her plot lines are almost always amazing and her characters are just, wow!

Okay, so let's start off with the overall plot arc. As much as I hated the beginning because Inej wasn't with the crew, it was so cool to get the other characters working together to try to help save her. I do enjoy the fact that saving her wasn't the biggest aspect of the plot. If it was, I don't think it would have been as convincing of a story. Then we move on to revenge as the rest of the plot. I just want to say that I freaking love revenge plots. They give purpose to everything that each character does, and just moves the story along well!

The fact that we weren't just tied to this book was great too! I loved how we got characters from the Grisha Trilogy in here. I was hoping that we would get more than just the mention that was given to us in the last book, but we got Genya, Zora and freaking Nikolai! They were amazing and brought more depth to the story that we may not have gotten without them.

I loved how Kaz was able to plan out every step in detail, assuming what people would do next. He is a master at his craft, I will tell you that.

Okay, so now onto some character studies:

I am going to start out with Nina. That girl has been through so much already, and it never fully gets better for her. From having to deal with the side effects of the withdrawls from Jurda Parem, having her best friend kidnapped, to having to find out her powers have been altered, to having the love of her life ripped from her, she does not have a good time in this book! I just wanted to wrap her up in a coat and feed her waffles, but she doesn't even really get those either! I just hope that she is able to find peace in Ravka with her fellow Grisha.

Now onto Matthias. He was honestly one of my favorite characters. The way he would try not to like or agree with the Dregs' way of doing things was just so hilarious and when he would try to fend off Nina's advances, I would actually cackle. He was the signal of change in the book. The proof that things could get better, but even that failed him. In his attempt to share the light of truth onto another Druskelle, he was inevitably killed for his beliefs. At least he finally got to kiss Nina, even if it was one of his final acts.

Now we are moving on to Jeseper. We got to meet his dad! Woo!! That was a really interesting relationship and backstory. I really like how sassy he is at all times, even if his sarcasm gets him in to trouble more times than not. Also, I love how he is a great shot because of his innate Grisha abilities. That was freaking amazing and I am so damn happy about it. I also love how smitten he is with Wylan. Like, for Christ's sake he calls him Wy when he starts crying. They are each others' rocks in the seas of shit that they cling to for dear life.

It's Wylan's turn! I hated how he wasn't fully himself for most of the book, but mostly I hated how inadequate he made himself feel. He is a genius and he shouldn't think anything less of himself. His relationship with his mother (who ISN'T dead?!?!?!?) is so sweet. But his brutality and unforgiving nature that shows up throughout the book was kind of a shock. He had been so mousy and quiet in the first book, but boy did that boy spit fire once he found out his father's assholishness. His back story is so tragic, like his father tried to straight up have him murdered when he thought he was just going off to a school that could actually make him happy. Jan Van Ick (lol) deserved every bit of punishment he got. I am glad he got what he wanted out of life. I also am in love with how he and Jesper first met.

Kuwei's got to get a little paragraph too. He is kind of annoying. I decided I didn't overly like him when he tricked Jesper into kissing him. Like, I totally understand, Jes is amazing, but he is TAKEN by my favorite ginger. Step back! I do, however, hope he is successful in finding a cure for Parem and making sure it does not get into the wrong hands.

Off to my boy Kaz. He makes himself out to be this stone cold guy with no feelings, but we all know how much of a lie that is. Holy hell, that boy is smitten with Inej. He takes every precaution he possibly can with her, much to her chagrin, but he just wants her safe. I was constantly yelling at my book, and therefore at him, to just take a chance! Tell Inej how you feel and why you are the way you are, but he wouldn't!!! It was so frustrating! But then, that moment when he is changing her bandages was so freaking tense. Like, they didn't even do anything, but damn, the tension in that room could have hurt someone. And then, at the end when he got her the boat AND found her parents, I almost died. I was so freaking happy he finally did something with his feelings, even if he didn't fully tell her, I think she got the hint. He even got the Menagerie to be shut down and burned, if that doesn't scream romance (from him), I don't know what does! And him getting the Dregs back was such a cool power move! He got every bit of revenge he wanted, including scaring the shit out of Pekka Rollins. So freaking good! Brick by brick bitches!

And finally, it's time for my favorite: Inej. Just like Nina, she has been through too much shit for her being such a youngin'. I am so glad she is okay and that she got her family (all of her family, including the Dregs) back in her life! She has a boat and she gets to go stop human trafficking (something that is really important and actually needs to be done in real life! Go to GAATW.org to find more information on how to stop this human rights violation). I think Inej is so strong in everything she does, but she still has those moments of doubt. When she goes against her "shadow" as she calls her, there are hesitations. She is only able to succeed when she gives in to all of her, both the Wraith and the Acrobat. That is something I think is really striking about her as a character. She isn't just one thing, she compartmentalizes herself, but once she comes together as a whole person, she is better for it. I think Leigh did a great job making Inej into someone to emulate toward (you know, minus the killing thing).

I'm going to write some of my favorite quotes out here, so bear with me for a bit:

"You are forsaken. As you have turned your back on me, so will they turn their backs on you." Inej, 64

"People point guns at each other all the time in Ketterdam. It's basically a handshake." Jesper, 79.

"Vile, ruthless, amoral. Isn't that why you hired Kaz in the first place? Becouse he does the things that no one else dares? Go on, Van Eck. Break my legs and see what happens. Dare him." Inej, 104

"When you were outgunned and out manned, you sought the less defended targets." Matthais, 107

"I would come for you. And if I couldn't walk, I'd crawl to you, and no matter how broken we were, we'd fight our way out together--knives drawn, pistols blazing. Because that's what we do. We never stop fighting." Kaz, 185

"Because through it all, he'd believed that he deserved his father's contempt, and now he could admit that somewhere, in some buried place, he'd hoped there might still be a way back to his father's good favor. Well, his father could keep that good favor and see what it brought him when Kaz Brekker was finished." Wylan, 223

"You aren't a flower, you're every blossom in the world blooming at once. You are a tidal wave. You're a stampede. You are overwhelming." Matthias, 233

"When Inej was on the high wire, it became her world. She could feel its tilt and pull. It was a planet and she was its moon. There was a simplicity to it that she never felt on the swings, where she was carried away by momentum. She loved the stillness she could find on the wire, and it was something no one else understood." Inej, 272

"After all she'd endured, he was the weak one. But she would never know what it was like for him to see Nina pull her close, watch Jesper loop his arm though hers, what it was to stand in doorways and against walls and know he could never draw nearer." Kaz, 364

"Wylan summoned every bit of bravado he'd learned from Nina, the will he's learned from Matthias, the focus he'd studied in Kax, the courage he'd learned from Inej, and the wild, reckless hope he learned from Jesper, the belief that no matter the odds, somehow they would win." Wylan, 427

"But just as surely as life connected everything, so did death. It was that endless, fast-running river. She'd dipped her fingers into its current, held the eddy of its power n her hand. She was the Queen of Mourning, and in its depths, she would never drown." Nina, 455

"But what about the rest of us? What about the nobodies and the nothings, the invisible girls? We learn to hold our heads as if we wear crowns. We learn to wring magic from the ordinary. That was how you survived when you weren't chosen, when there was no royal blood in your veins. When the world owed you nothing, you demanded something of it anyway." Inej, 460

Overall, I freaking loved this series. I am so sad to see it go, but I was glad to be a part of it. Leigh, if you read this (which I doubt you will, but whatever) I want to thank you for your phenomenal writing in this world and I cannot wait to see what you do next!
  
The Grimm Forest
The Grimm Forest
2018 | Fantasy
I am so psyched to be reviewing another board game based on fairytale lore. The Brothers Grimm material is such an enchanting (eh? eh?) theme and games can be taken in so many wonderful directions. Though I have never actually read any of the Grimm’s Fairy Tales (I know, I know), I have seen most of the movies based on the stories. I also know that the source material happens to be way darker than what Disney puts out, so when I heard we would be receiving The Grimm Forest to review, and not having really researched it much beforehand, I had a feeling it would be darker fare. But how dark does it go? Let’s find out.

The Grimm Forest is a simultaneous action selection, set collection, take that game for four family members of the infamous Three Little Pigs. As fantasy contractors players are tasked with constructing three houses as sturdy and quickly as they can. However, these contractors will have competition for limited resources, as well as the occasional interference from scary creatures and buddies of opponents. Like the baseball movie says, “If you build it, you will win the contract to build more stuff.” Or something like that.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup, place the Location boards on the table for the Fields, Forest, and Brickyard (for a three-player game, as below). The First Builder Bonus tokens are placed below the matching Locations as well as the resources that can be harvested. One of each Mega Resource (5 Straw, 4 Wood, 3 Brick) are placed on the matching Location at the beginning of each round. The Friend and Fable decks are shuffled and placed nearby, as are the House sections (Floors, Walls, Roofs – Rooves?), and the Monster minis. Each player chooses a color and collects the Player board, Pig mini, and Gather cards matching that color. The first player is given the Starting Player tome token and the game may now begin!
The Grimm Forest is played over a series of rounds with each pig having a multi-step turn. Initially, however, the pigs will be deciding from which Location they would like to harvest resources by laying the corresponding Gather card from their hand to the table face-down. Once all pigs have laid their card, the Gather cards are flipped and revealed simultaneously. If any pig had chosen to also play one Fable card it would have been revealed and possibly resolved prior to this step. Players will place their Pig mini on the Location board they chose and then harvesting of resources may begin, unless a player has a Fable card that resolves at this point in the turn. If a Pig is alone in a Location they receive all resources currently found there. If Pigs share a Location then the shared minis will share the resources equally, keeping any remaining resources on the Location for the next round. If any player used a Fable card that activates at the end of the Gather phase, it is resolved now.

After the Gather phase, the Pigs will be able to take actions. On their turn, in turn order, each Pig may choose to perform two of the following actions in any order they wish (actions may be repeated except for Friend Special Actions): Draw a Fable card, Gain 1 Resource, Build, Special Actions. Drawing a Fable card is self-explanatory and players will keep their Fable cards secret from the other players. They may choose to play one of these Fable cards during the choosing of Gather cards portion of the beginning phase of a turn. A Pig may instead wish to gain one resource of their choosing and add it to their collection. As mentioned earlier, a Pig may also use their active Friend card’s (which is earned by building a Wall section) Special Action once per turn, should they have collected one earlier.

The true hero of The Grimm Forest is the Build action as this is what propels players to victory. Pigs may Build any house type they wish, as long as that type is not currently under construction elsewhere on their board. Also note that houses must be built from the ground up so Floors must be present before Walls can be built and Walls need to be constructed in order to hold up a Roof. Pigs may build these sections of houses by discarding the appropriate number and type of resources they have gathered previously: two resources for a Floor, four resources for Walls, and six resources for a Roof. Once a Pig completes construction of the first house of a type they will grab the matching First Builder Bonus token and reap its rewards.


The game continues in this fashion until one player has built three houses of any type, or multiple players have completed their three houses by the end of the round. Those tied players then check for sturdiness to break their tie: brick houses are sturdier than wood, which are sturdier than straw. The winner is the player with the sturdiest collection of houses, and then all players are invited to share a plate of bacon in celebration of the win (not in the rules, but I added that for… flavor).
Components. This game is chocked full of killer components. I do not oftentimes compliment boxes and inserts, but when a game comes with GameTrayz already, you know that the publisher cared a ton about the game. Everything sets up and tears down so much nicer and quicker with a GameTrayz insert that I wish every game would come with them. Yeah, I know, $$$. Outside of the insert (or inside?) the other components in the game are simply stellar. Everything from the card backs resembling book covers, the incredible plastic house pieces, and amazing minis, just makes this one sing when on the table. The art is done by the incredible Mr. Cuddington, and they are quickly becoming some of my favorite board game artists.

Wait, there are monster minis? But I didn’t talk about that in my overview. Well, yes, that’s correct. These monsters come into play from certain Fable cards, and when they are played it instructs the player to introduce the appropriate monster mini on the playing area. This can be done with such dramatic flair that you truly get a sense of dread that little piggies may feel. If you have seen Stranger Things (not a sponsor) and remember the part when the Demogorgon mini hits the table, then you understand how I introduce my monster minis. These monsters wreak havoc on the players and sometimes deny them resources, and other chaos to mess with pigs.

Overall, I am so enamored with this game. It has nearly everything I love about games. It has amazing theme and art. That is always big with me. The components are super high quality, as all Druid City Games/Skybound Games usually are, and the game is so smooth once it is learned. All phases and turn components work together well, and there are plenty of choices each player makes every round. The game comes with advanced rules and components as well once all players are comfortable with the base game, and I love when games come with that added complexity and difficulty.

I have nothing bad to say about this game at all, which makes me sad, because I can usually find something to improve with every game I play. Okay wait, I just thought of one: I appreciate that the player colors include both orange and purple, but then the others are blue and green. I think the player colors could have come with some different choices as I feel blue, green, and purple are within similar color bands. Maybe pink and aqua would be better choices for my taste? I don’t know, and I am sure research was done to decide on the player colors, but like I said, I needed to find SOMETHING to complain about.

So it is certainly no surprise that I love this game and rated so highly. I doubt it will ever truly break into my Top 10, but I feel it ticks all of my boxes for a great game and a 6 from me. Purple Phoenix Games as a whole gives this one a porky 15 / 18. If you are looking for a great game that is admittedly lighter, but gives great gameplay throughout, features incredible art and components, and offers opportunities for role-play then you definitely need to grab a copy of The Grimm Forest. I will be recommending this to so many gamers in the future, and I will be pushing the floor of the age suggestion on the box once my son decides he wants to learn to read. I think I am going to go try out the Advanced rules now, and remember: don’t eat an apple that a scary person gave you at the door.