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The Commuter (2018)
The Commuter (2018)
2018 | Crime, Drama, Mystery
“This train is freaking me out”.
“The Commuter” is not a good film. You know that I’m not a prude about action films: “Die Hard” is one of my all time favourites and I even gave this actor/director combo’s previous outing – “Non-Stop” – a rather generous three Fads. But like many of my commutes, this is a hundred minutes of life that I won’t get back again.
Liam Neeson (“A Monster Calls“, “Taken 3“) plays Michael MacCauley an insurance salesman (no, I’m not making it up) who of course used to be a police officer with a certain set of skills. With advancing years, a couple of mortgages to keep up and a son about to go to college, he is financially rather exposed.


“Give me a sausage roll off the trolley…. NOW damn it”.
When a bad day turns worse, the commuting MacCauley is approached by a mysterious woman (Vera Farmiga, “The Judge“, “Up In The Air”) who offers him a financial bail-out for doing “just one small thing”. No, it’s not for sex in the toilet… it’s to use his familiarity with the train and its normal passengers to find the person that ‘doesn’t fit there’. For there is a lot at stake and MacCauley is drawn into a perilous game where his own life and the lives of his son and wife Karen (Elizabeth McGovern, “Downton Abbey”) are put at risk.

Vera Farmiga has a proposition for Liam Neeson.
What the inexperienced writers (Byron Willinger, Philip de Blasi and Ryan Engle (“Non-stop”)) were clearly shooting for was a Hitchcockian “ordinary man in deep-water” style flick of the James Stewart “North by Northwest” variety…. but they really miss this by a mile. With the 65 year old Liam Neeson – here playing 60 – performing acrobatics on, under and across an express train, belief is not just suspended – it is hung drawn and quartered! The action is just ludicrously unrealistic.
Unfortunately, Neeson – although still looking remarkably good for his advanced years – is increasingly is starting to look like Roger Moore in “A View to a Kill”: its time to hang up the ‘action hero’ coat and focus on more character acting pieces (this was the man who gave us Oskar Schindler after all).

A chain defies all the laws of physics… train guard Colin McFarlane tries to help Neeson avoid disaster. A green screen is obviously not evident!
The plot also has more holes than a moth-eaten jumper. Omnipotence of the villains is evident, but never explained, and while they are fiendishly clever in some aspects they are face-palmingly stupid about others. (No spoilers, but the threat to MacCauley’s family is mind-numbingly foilable).

It was fairly obvious that Obi Wan Kenobi was out of place on the train. No.. of course not… this was just MacCauley’s commuting pal Walt (Jonathan Banks)
A ‘major event’ at the end of reel two (if you’ve seen the spoilerish trailer you’ll know what this is) leads – notably without any ‘consequence’ – into a completely ridiculous final reel that beggars belief. It also includes a “twist” so obvious that the writers must have assumed an IQ of sub-50.

What’s the great Sam Neill (“Jurassic Park”) doing in this mess?
This is a film that melds “Taken”, “Non-stop”, “Unstoppable”, “Strangers on a Train” and – most bizarrely and cringe-worthily – “Spartacus” to create a cinematic mess of supreme proportions. I put director Jaume Collet-Serra’s last film – “The Shallows” – into my Top 10 films of 2016. He’ll be lucky if this one doesn’t make my “Turkeys of the Year” list for 2018.
Avoid!
  
The Shallows (2016)
The Shallows (2016)
2016 | Drama, Mystery
The Deathly Shallows, part 1
Every shark movie is inevitably compared (unfavourably) against Spielberg’s classic 1975 tourist-muncher. And “The Shallows” is no exception. But while not a 5-Fad classic, this flick comes pretty close by being hugely enjoyable and having a lot going for it.
Waxing lyrically. The shapely Blake Liveley.
Waxing lyrically. The shapely Blake Liveley.

Blake Lively (“The Age of Adeline“) plays surfer and trainee doctor Nancy, still grieving the recent death from cancer of her mother and travelling to a remote Mexican surf beach where she has photos of her mother surfing while pregnant with her. While surfing alone, Nancy is attacked a couple of hundred yards from the shore by a Great White and severely injured. She has the choice of refuge of either a low rock or another less palatable floating object. Choosing the rock (at low tide) she is faced with the dilemma of both surviving her injuries and then being rescued before the high tide takes the rock and leaves her to the mercy of the ever circling big-fish.
We're going to need a bigger rock.
We’re going to need a bigger rock.

A big summer blockbuster this is not, with a total cast of eleven (not including a guest appearance of Steven Seagull (as himself)). But the small cast doesn’t make it less gripping, and gripping it most certainly is, with tension building progressively (emphasised periodically by an on-screen clock) with the countdown to high tide.

Blake Lively is an underrated actress and really delivers the goods here. And bearing in mind the problems that Spielberg had with his mechanical shark Bruce (named after Spielberg’s lawyer) the appearance of the shark is limited to where actually needed, with Lively having to fill in the blanks with reaction shots. As your imagination is still far better than any special effects, this is hugely effective for certain sequences.
Pure horror: here Dad had gone down to the video rental and come back with 'Dirty Grandpa'.
Pure horror: her Dad had gone down to the video rental and come back with ‘Dirty Grandpa’.

The film draws similarities to another interesting entry in the “Jaws” genre – “Open Water 2: Adrift” from 2006. In that film there was the same incessant threat of shark attack combined with the audience frustration that safety (in that case, the deck of their yacht, if only they had let a ladder down) being so near. Here the 200 yards to the shore is shoutable to but still 190 yards too far.
The cinematography (by Flavio Martínez Labiano) is also just beautifully done with some stunning surf and underwater shots that not only highlight Ms Lively’s lithely (sic) figure and her Californian surfing skills, but also the beauty of the ‘Mexican coast’ (actually Lord Howe Island in New South Wales, Australia).

“The Shallows” was written by Anthony Jaswinski and directed by Jaume Collet-Serra (the director of “Non-Stop“, aka Taken 3.5). It comes with a truly impressive BvS quotient of just 5.9%!
So with all of this going for it, you would think that my rating is heading towards at least a 4.5. But all films like this require a satisfying denouement, and unfortunately this is where this one comes off the rails. It is just plain silly and, together with an unnecessary and irritating epilogue scene, diminishes what was on track to be one of the best films of the summer. So here’s the “One Mann’s Movies” solution:
Using Final Cut X, Adobe Premier or your favourite video editing suite, cut out the scene from 115:00 to 116:00 from “Jaws”;
Photoshop Blake Lively’s face onto Roy Scheider’s body.
Insert the finished clip into “The Shallows” at about 82 minutes in.
Enjoy a 5-Fad classic!
This limitation aside, it’s still worth your while hunting it out at a cinema near you, since the fantastic cinematography is best suited to a big screen.
  
FIRESTARTER (2022)
FIRESTARTER (2022)
2022 | Action, Horror
3
4.4 (5 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Commits the Biggest Film Crime - It's Boring
Sometimes, I watch a movie, so you don’t have to.

I watched the remake of the Stephen King novel FIRESTARTER, so you don’t have to.

The current “leader in the clubhouse” for the worst film of 2022, FIRESTARTER is based on the very good Stephen King novel that was published in 1980 and was made into a pretty cheesy, pretty ‘80s flick in 1984 that made Drew Barrymore (fresh off her work in ET) a bonafide movie star.

No such luck in this one.

Produced by Blum House, Directed by Keith Thomas (THE VIGIL) and adapted from King’s novel by Scott Teems (HALLOWEEN KILLS), this version of FIRESTARTER was dead on arrival, with a weak script, mediocre directing and less than stellar visual effects, consequently making a film that is the worst sort of film…boring. It doesn’t even have the ambition to be “so bad, it’s good”, it is just plodding and mediocre throughout.

But, at 1 hour 34 minutes, it is mercifully short, so it does have that going for it.

What it also has going for it is a “game” Zach Efron as “Firestarter’s Father” and he elevates the scenes he is in to something that comes close to watchable. And when Sydney Lemmon is along as “Firestarter’s Mom” the screen comes the closest to interesting. But the rest…”meh”.

Ryan Kiera Armstrong plays “Firestarter”, Charlie McGee - the young lady who can start fires with her telepathic powers - and she is “just fine”, but she does not have the star power or “it” factor that Barrymore brought to the proceedings previously. She is just not a compelling enough presence on screen to save this turkey. I don’t blame her, I blame the weak Direction by Thomas and the limp script by Teems.

The only other character/performance that sparks some interest in this film is Michael Grayeyes (TOGO) who plays a Native American tracker with his own telekinetic powers who is put on the trail of Charlie by the mysterious Institute (a shadowy Gov’t agency that chases after various “special” people - mostly kids - in quite a few Stephen King novels). Inexplicably, this role was played by an aging, pony-tailed George C. Scott (obviously chasing a paycheck) in the 1984 film. Grayeyes succeeds more.

But these glimmers of competence only aggravates more when the film bogs back down in cardboard villains (what has happened to your career, Gloria Ruben) and exposition spouting scientists (what a waste of Kurtwood Smith) and less than spectacular action sequences that, mostly, consist of Armstrong screaming while a wind machine blows her hair back while sub-par CGI flames engulf the screen.

And…adding insult to injury…the "guy in the asbestos suit” (a mainstay of any film involving fire) does not even get a day of stunt pay! It’s like going to see a Tom Cruise Mission Impossible film and Cruise doesn’t do some sort of crazy stunt!

After the success of IT, PART ONE in 2017, there was a renaissance, of sorts, of adaptations of Stephen King works and even though PET SEMATARY (2019) was pretty decent and IT, CHAPTER TWO and DOCTOR SLEEP (2019) were okay, THE DARK TOWER, the TV remake of THE STAND, LISEY’S STORY and now FIRESTARTER were all terrible, so maybe we’ve seen the end of this phase of King adaptations (I doubt it, but one can hope).

Save yourself and hour and a half of your life and skip this Firestarter. Instead, revisit the 1984 version - it plays like an Oscar-winner compared to this turkey. Or, better yet, read the original Stephen King work - it is the best of all of these.

Letter Grade: C- (and I’m being generous)

3 stars (out of 10) and you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis).
  
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BankofMarquis (1832 KP) rated John Wick: Chapter 3 - Parabellum (2019) in Movies

May 19, 2019 (Updated May 19, 2019)  
John Wick: Chapter 3 - Parabellum (2019)
John Wick: Chapter 3 - Parabellum (2019)
2019 | Action, Crime, Thriller
Great Fight Choreography in a very strong 3rd Chapter
The latest installment of the JOHN WICK story (titled CHAPTER 3 - PARABELLUM) is one long chase scene. It's 2 hours and 10 minutes of John Wick (Keanu Reeves) running and fighting and chasing and fighting and running again and fighting again.

And...that's just fine with me. For JOHN WICK 3 (JW3 as I'll call it from now on) is one of the finest choreographed films (fight scene-wise) that I have seen in quite a long time.

Picking up right after JOHN WICK CHAPTER 2 - JW3 follows John as he is declared "Ex-Communicado" from the underground Assassins organization that he has been a part of, then retired from, then pulled back in with a $14 million bounty on his head.

This flick kicks right into action (literally) with John and a few "red-shirt assassins" taking on each other in a hallway filled with knives. Will all these knives be used in the ensuing fight? You bet they will be - but it is how they are used - and how this scene (and all the fight scenes) are set-up, choreographed, and shot that makes this movie a strong cut above the standard fare in this sort of film.

That's because Director Chad Stahelski - a stunt man/fight coordinator for over 70 films - wisely focuses his attention on the grace, athleticism and strength of the stunts/fights and eschews the "quick-cut edit" style of fight scenes that is so en vogue these days. Stahelski keeps his camera "in place" and lets us, the audience, watch what's going on in (seemingly) long shots that are going to have you saying to yourself "how did they do that". Stahelski has helmed all 3 John Wick films thus far and I hope he helms many, many more.

You'll also be asking yourself how did 53 year old Keanu Reeves do all that fight work? It is incredible, physical work for him - and he is up to the task. John Wick is a man of few words - and much, much action - which suits the acting talents of this performer quite well.

Back for another go in the series - and having fun along the way - are Ian McShane, Lawrence Fishburne and Lance Reddick - as colleagues, collaborators and/or foes of John Wick in this underworld. Capably joining in - with just as much a twinkle in their eyes - are Angelica Huston, Hallee Berry (in her best work in years) and Jerome Flynn (Bron from Game of Thrones). A new addition (at least to me) was the strong work brought forth by Asia Kate Dillon (TV's ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK) as "the Adjudicator" - who is monitoring the John Wick proceedings, Special mention needs to be made of the work of Mark Dacascos (TV's Iron Chef America!) as Wick's chief adversary - a strong effort (both acting-wise and physically/fighting wise) that I just didn't know this performer had in him.

A quick side-note on some animal performances here. There is a scene where a bad guy "gets it" from a horse...and I thought...how are they going to top that...and then immediately top it - GOOD FOR YOU, HORSE! And...a film has FINALLY figured out a way to use attack/guard dogs in a way that had you rooting for these four-legged, furry friends over the fiends they are attacking.

But...make no mistake about this...this film is about the fighting...and the intriguing Assassin's world that was first presented in the original (and I do mean ORIGINAL) John Wick film. I said at the time that I hoped they would expand this world, I wanted to see more of it. And...expand it they have...for the better. The world has become more intriguing to me, and I want EVEN MORE, PLEASE, of this world and of the uniquely original fight choreography that comes along with it.

This film is not for everyone - it is bloody (but in a "cartoon way"...I wouldn't say it is gory) and it is one long chase scene. But, if this is "your thing", you'll enjoy it very much.

Letter Grade: A-

8 stars out of 10 and you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis)