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Hocus Pocus (1993)
Hocus Pocus (1993)
1993 | Comedy, Fantasy, Horror
A full-tilt ball, I tend to be averse to anything ruminating with *this* much untamed theater kid energy - but Sarah Jessica Parker, Kathy Najimy, and of-fucking-course Bette Midler are 110% off the chain. I admit that the odious 90s stereotypes in this are hard to stomach, but I miss when Disney's live action allowed for such sublime scenery-chewing like this trio of perfect performances instead of Will Smith and some dude tepidly talking about jelly for what feels like an hour. I hate to be that guy, but something this lively just couldn't be recreated from the company today; Kenny Ortega's knack for brilliant practical effects and super impressive CGI for the time today is replaced by plastic visuals and flat soundstages where any sense of fun all but evaporates. Make no mistake, this is still not much more than pure fluff at the end of the day - but Lord it's such a blast. One of the few millennial-worship films I can fully understand the hype for, a delightful cross between š˜›š˜©š˜¦ š˜žš˜Ŗš˜µš˜¤š˜©š˜¦š˜“ š˜°š˜§ š˜Œš˜¢š˜“š˜µš˜øš˜Ŗš˜¤š˜¬ and "The Three Stooges". It's also consistently funny. "I Put A Spell On You" is a bop, and maybe I'm just getting old but the stuff at the end had me genuinely choked up.
  
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band by The Beatles
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band by The Beatles
1967 | Pop, Psychedelic, Rock

"I guess you could pick any one album of their mid- to late-period, especially Revolver or Rubber Soul. This was very much discovered as a teenager, their story, their music, the feeling of a slight sense of ownership. I donā€™t like that, in a way, because I hate it when people feel that they kind of own our songs as a band! But anyway, anyoneā€™s whoā€™s grown up with The Beatles feels that sense of, ā€œTheyā€™re mine!ā€. But Sgt. Pepper'sā€¦ is just mind-bending as to how ambitious it is and also what their energy must have been like and the scene they were occupying. I wish that existed now; unfortunately it just doesnā€™t. There was a kind of innocence to that time that doesnā€™t exist now, it was a time when great pop music... you... you still had to try. I think one of my big problems with music today, with a lot of the pop music thatā€™s out there, donā€™t get me wrong, thereā€™s a lot of great music, but most of what the general population listen to or are exposed to is really kind of mindless or soulless and music can do so much more for you as a human being."

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Berlin Alexanderplatz (1980)
Berlin Alexanderplatz (1980)
1980 | Documentary, Drama, International
(0 Ratings)
Movie Favorite

"Yes, there was quite a controversy kicked up last year over the restoration. And while itā€™s not an uninteresting issue, it doesnā€™t distract from the gratitude we who hold Fassbinder dear feel when we hold this handsome box in our hands. This is the epic he was racing against destiny to complete; poring over the extras, you canā€™t help but sense that he knew it too. All of Fassbinderā€™s period pieces are, of course, about the Germany he lived in, the Germany I would begin visiting regularly just a few years after heā€™d gone, a Germany at ferocious odds with itself, arguing in the streets and in the papers and in classrooms and over dinner over what sort of country itā€™d make of itself, even in those later stages of starting all over againā€”not too long, of course, before starting all over yet again in 1989. An intense love-hate relationship with the German character, with German history and culture, and an ongoing recognition of the inextricability of the personal and the political, for better and for worse, permeate all of Fassbinderā€™s work; here, all thatā€™s practically on parade. And the fireworks at the end are gruesome and gripping."

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Half Baked (1998)
Half Baked (1998)
1998 | Comedy
Ironically, not even that much better while high. I liked this for the majority of the runtime but that third act really tried my patience - falls into the exact line as other late 90s/early 00s buddy comedies in vein of š˜‹š˜¶š˜„š˜¦, š˜žš˜©š˜¦š˜³š˜¦'š˜“ š˜”š˜ŗ š˜Šš˜¢š˜³? and the like that I just fucking hate, where the film completely gives up and a bunch of tiring 'wacky' stuff happens until it abruptly ends. Pretty typical hit-or-miss stoner comedy of the era but easy to forgive when the thing isn't even 85 minutes in length. It's agreeable enough with some seriously funny shit in it every now and again, mostly only holding its own in the sea of other similar movies due to its trio of three sharp, exuberant lead performances - Jim Breuer's final boss tie-dyed pothead steals the show with extreme prejudice (seriously, has anyone else in a movie ever exuded *more* stoner energy than this guy?). Can be lumped right in with š˜”š˜Ŗš˜“š˜“ š˜”š˜¢š˜³š˜¤š˜© in the "kind of funny, semi-decent films written by people who are clearly above such work but also maybe that was the point of it to begin with?" pile. But Bob Saget's "I used to suck dick for coke!" bit remains as iconic and effortlessly hysterical as ever.
  
Exile on Main St. by The Rolling Stones
Exile on Main St. by The Rolling Stones
1972 | Rock

"Well I was always a Sticky Fingers and Goatā€™s Head Soup guy. But I never really understood Exileā€¦. Well it was more that everyone was going on about it and I didnā€™t understand why. And I just thought there were too many songs on it, and too many unfinished ideas. And you kept seeing all these editions of it. I hate it when youā€™ve got a band like the Rolling Stones who have millions of brilliant songs and loads of great albums and someone goes: ā€œBut THIS is the definitive, mega album.ā€ I just donā€™t like being told that, so I was always quite resistant. But then last year I just said: ā€œEnough is enough, Iā€™m going to stop fighting it.ā€ I read something amazing about that period of their touring and how mental it was, and I thought, ā€œFuck it, Iā€™ll listen to it again.ā€ And I listened to it, and havenā€™t stopped listening to it! I love it now. Itā€™s got loads of brilliant songs on it, but they arenā€™t like mega hit songs, if you look through the list you donā€™t see what you would consider to be one of the all-time golden classic Rolling Stones songs. But when you listen to the album it just makes sense."

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Slumdog Millionaire (2008)
Slumdog Millionaire (2008)
2008 | Drama, Romance
A once again astounding Dev Patel sells otherwise sulking, superficial melodrama. Don't you hate when the framing device is more interesting than the actual story? If not for the calamitous š˜ š˜¦š˜“š˜µš˜¦š˜³š˜„š˜¢š˜ŗ then the stuff when they were kids here would be some of the worst moments of Boyle's entire career - overedited to smithereens, fetishistic of plight, and vaguely offensive. Even when this gets good I'm convinced this movie is much more concerned with dragging these characters through the mud and inflicting pain to wring synthetic sympathy rather than fleshing them out beyond one-note characterizations and abrupt turnarounds. Still pressed this brilliant premise didn't get the justice it truly deserved but the last hour of this is executed about as engagingly as it could have been, for what it ended up being (which only makes the transition from the older stuff to the newer stuff more jarring) and randomly gets super entertaining, if not much less simplistic. Score is pretty decent, too. It's alright but not sure why this shook everyone's world back in the day, you guys do know Indian cinema exists too, no? Way better than š˜‰š˜¦š˜¢š˜“š˜µš˜“ š˜°š˜§ š˜µš˜©š˜¦ š˜šš˜°š˜¶š˜µš˜©š˜¦š˜³š˜Æ š˜žš˜Ŗš˜­š˜„ but way shittier than š˜“š˜Ŗš˜°š˜Æ. The "Jai Ho" segment is as cringey as it is memorable.
  
Onward (2020)
Onward (2020)
2020 | Adventure, Animation, Comedy
This could have been the whole game, instead just feels like a fetch quest. Gotta say, (sarcasm incoming) really love the idea here to get two once-charming actors who have since had most of their personality sucked dry by the Marvel beast to lend their hardly descript vocal talents to a hardly descript movie of hardly descript characters. Did we just collectively decide against actual voice acting anymore over dry celebrities practically voicing themselves? Ends with a complete cop-out and its breathtaking animation is clouded by either murk or oversaturation seemingly deliberately. Not to mention the character design is ass-ugly. Can't entirely hate it though, not without some charm and handful of okay moments - but whose idea was it to set up this gold mine premise of magic being systematically pushed out of the world by technology for nothing more than simple convenience... and then do fucking nothing with it while setting it in this bland suburbia of normalcy? Potential brilliance in storytelling through an epic, gorgeous video game-esque Disney film is squandered for another antiseptic, indifferent retread of the most basic themes from the company. Not even funny, either. Had more fun with it than I'm probably letting on but I simultaneously loathe what this represents.
  
Doctor Who: The Death of Art
Doctor Who: The Death of Art
2
2.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Time for some troof! I tried reading this back when it first came out. I found it $2.95 at a used book store in the U.S. (Philadelphia, to be exact). The premise seemed neat and I saw a mention of Ace in the first few pages, so I felt I was on board. Yeah, no.

Jump ahead to now, I have been re-visiting key 7th Doctor NAs (sorry, but anyone who thinks NuWHO is groundbreaking or mentally stimulating, needs to read some of these and re-evaluate that statement. Just steer clear of this one!). This one was next on my list, as I wanted to give it a second chance, as my mind is so much more freer these days.

Unfortunately, my original opinion still stands for me: this book is rubbish! The beginning is interesting, but then goes so far out of the loop with that Chapter about alien race the Quoth. When Simon Bucher-Jones is on his game, he is A-MAZ-ING, not unlike Brian Michael Bendis when he writes his own creations, but when he sucks like this? <b>PEEEEE-YOOOO!</b>

By all means, do not waste any time, energy, etc. trying to endure this! Your mind will hate for years to come!
  
Leprechaun (1993)
Leprechaun (1993)
1993 | Comedy, Horror, Sci-Fi
The original Leprechaun is so so silly. It's low budget, it's brimming with unfunny jokes, it's not scary in the slightest, but dammit it's hard to hate on it too much.

The characters in Leprechaun are mostly typical easy-to-dislike personality voids (apart from my boy Ozzie), but some of the casting is notable. Of course, a pre-Friends Jennifer Aniston takes the lead and is likable enough, but the main star is obviously Warwick Davis. This being the early nineties, the horror genre was firmly set on its villains being the star, following the success of 80s icons such as Freddy Krueger, and the titular creature takes up most of the spotlight.
The Leprechaun himself is so-so. He's more of a little shit than a full blown monster, and the majority of his one liners aren't particularly funny, but Davis is clearly giving his all in this role, and is no doubt the sole reason why this movie spawned an entire franchise, even if Lep is ultimately a poor man's Chucky.

As far as cheesy horror films go, you could do a lot worse than Leprechaun (it's many sequels for example). It's cheap and trashy, but it's still pretty entertaining.
  
The Beast (The Beast, #1)
The Beast (The Beast, #1)
Jaden Wilkes | 2014 | Contemporary, Romance
6
6.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
I felt like this story had some potential, especially with the first few chapters. However, it quickly changed for me. "The Beast' is written in dual personalities, that of Dimitri and Columbia, which suited the story fine, but a lot of it felt boringly repetitious - reading almost the exact same moments, just with different points of view. Then came the instalove. Sure, Columbia put up a decent fight, but everything that happens before Columbia returns home literally happens within 2 days, tops. By then, Dimitri is already changing and deciding she's the cure to his darkness and Columbia is trying not to confess that she's already in love with him. I hate to say it, but once both characters suddenly decided it didn't matter how fast they fell for each other, it's what they truly felt, I lost a lot of interest in the story. Jaden promises a tale of darkness without the "typical love story" aspect. Sure, most love stories don't involve an ex-Russian mafia murderer falling in love with a self-harming, sexually abused young woman... But the instalove, the immediate realization that this person is "different", the sudden desire to change a characteristic that's been ingrained for years... That stuff was fluff.