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Blood Red Road (Dust Lands, #1)
Blood Red Road (Dust Lands, #1)
Moira Young | 2011 | Science Fiction/Fantasy, Young Adult (YA)
10
8.9 (7 Ratings)
Book Rating
Blood Red Road has a searing pace, a poetically minimal writing style, violent action, and an epic love story. Moira Young is one of the most promising and startling new voices in teen fiction.

Blood Red Road completely took over my life for the few hours I was reading it. I found myself physically excited from reading. It was one of those books where you forget how long you've been reading and you look up to discover it's four hours later than it was five minutes ago, and the book is almost over. Dang. Then someone calls you to do chores and you get upset because you can't stop reading now!

Blood Red Road has everything a book should have: Immediately developed characters, tension the whole time, a multi-layered plot, and conflict around ever turn.

It seemed that one thing just naturally led to another—and that's the way it should be. Things don't always go as planned, people don't always do as you tell them to, and we're not always honest with ourselves about our feelings and motives. There were so many different layers, so many different things that influenced the book, that it felt real.

The writing was interesting. It was written the way the characters spoke. "Aks" instead of "Ask," "Thinkin" instead of "Thinking," "Fer" instead of "for," and a lot of slang like "kinda" and "ain't." At first it was really annoying, but then I got used to it and it didn't bother me. It slowed down my reading a little, but it didn't interfere with the pacing of the book (just my reading speed). It greatly added to the characters.

People betray us. People change. People fall in love. They argue with each other, they hate and they love at the same time, they put up with crap and they pitch fits. And that's what happens, so that's the way the characters were. I loved the change in Saba and Emmi's relationship (Emmi is her little sister) and I loved the growth, tearing down, tension, and forgiveness in the relationship between Saba and Jack.

Of course it wouldn't have been complete without a love story. Saba is so totally against outside help, so against Jack's attention (or maybe just terrified of it), that it causes an annoying and infuriating love story that gave me flashbacks to Mortal Instruments. (Only much better, because Jack is much more of a man than Jace. They both flirt about as often, though...)

I liked everything about this book except that it's only 512 pages. I didn't want it to end. I even like the cover. I saw it and thought "Oh I'm going to like that book." Saba looked like a kick-ass heroine. She is. I like her a lot (when she's not being a smart-aleck to Jack, and a jerk to her little sister).

And now I wait. This happened to me when I read The Hunger Games, Birthmarked, and Magic Under Glass, too. I read it first (either the day it was released, or I read the ARC), then had to wait longer than everyone else to get the sequel because I read it before they did. It stinks. Luckily, Blood Red Road doesn't have the horrible cliff hanger endings that Suzanne Collins, Cassandra Claire, and Jaclyn Dolamore have in their books. However, you can bet I will be holding my breath for the next one. Moria Young is going on my "auto-buy" list.

Content: Some violence, but not gore. I don't remember if there was any minor language, but there was so strong language. No sex. Ages 14+
  
Weekend at Bernie's (1989)
Weekend at Bernie's (1989)
1989 | Comedy
6
6.6 (11 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Could Have Been Better
Two friends show up at their boss Bernie's beachhouse for a weekend retreat only to find Bernie dead. To maintain innocence, they decide to go through with the weekend while hiding Bernie in plain sight for all to see.

Acting: 10
One of the highlights of the film. Terry Kiser owns the role of Bernie Lomax, playing a man you love to hate. There's never a point where you like this guy and of course that's the whole idea.

My personal favorite role came from Jonathan Silverman who plays Richard Parker--a play-by-the-rules kind of guy that just wants to do the right thing. His humor, similar to Cameron Frye in Ferris Bueller's Day Off shines most when his character is inserted into situations he desperately wants to get out of. I enjoyed watching how frantic he would get in certain scenes.

Beginning: 10

Characters: 5
Outside of Bernie and Richard, there weren't any characters that grabbed my interest. Larry (Andrew McCarthy) was written way too douchey which I'm guessing was for the purpose of being the balance to Richard. I hated Larry's character but not for the same reason I hated Bernie. Larry had zero redeeming qualities and his willingness to throw Richard under the bus at any given moment bugged the crap out of me. I get it, he's a jerk, but sheesh. A little overboard for my taste.

Cinematography/Visuals: 5
Not a whole lot of moments that stood out. I did like the contrast of how the lighting changed with them being in the city versus at the beach. Shots of Bernie doing various things (washing up on the beach, waterskiing) were shining points in an otherwise dull movie.

Conflict: 3
The preposterous premise eventually overwhelmed me. You've got two guys running around trying to show everyone this guy is still alive when I'm thinking the whole time, "What would be the harm in telling the truth?" One or two funny moments don't make up for the fact that the film probably should have ended twenty minutes in.

Genre: 4
Considering most of the jokes fell flat for me and this film is supposed to be a comedy, I don't think I need to expand further here.

Memorability: 7
In the few moments where the film was funny, it was really funny. When the hitman that killed Bernie originally kept finding him alive, I would crack up everytime he would have to kill Bernie again. It's memorable moments like these that make me think about the handful of tweaks they could have made to really push the film over the top.

Pace: 5
When a comedy isn't very funny, you better believe it's going to move at a slow pace. It wasn't unbearable, but I was definitely ready for the film to be over by the time it reached the end. Inconsistencies and bad comedic choices made for a very wavy pace.

Plot: 8
Love it or hate it, I can't deny that it's at least unique. And furthermore, if you were going to parade your boss around pretending he was alive, I imagine it probably would have gone the same way with one crazy antic happening after another. My subtraction of two came from this mere fact that I couldn't shake: Eventually, Bernie's going to smell. And it should have been all downhill from there.

Resolution: 6

Overall: 63
Glad I saw it once. No need to ever see it again. It's very much a bucket list film that I can now bury and erase from my memory.
  
Ride of Her Life
Ride of Her Life
Kimberly Dean | 2012 | Contemporary, Erotica, Fiction & Poetry
5
5.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Woman Surprised When Neighbor Waits For Her When Coming Home Late
Genre: Contemporary, Erotica

Word Count: 3,830

Average Smashwords rating: 5 out of 5 stars

My rating: 2.5 out of 5 stars

Warning: quotes below are certainly rated R.

When Andrea’s car breaks down and she gets a ride home with a coworker, the last thing she expects is her sexy yet scary-looking neighbor, Bo, waiting for her and livid. Worried out of his mind, Bo is done flirting with Andrea without action. Tonight, he’ll show her exactly what he wants with her.


Ride of Her Life is a hot little escape, but it’s like daydreaming about the stock photo of a tattooed macho man. True, it has some great sexy time.

He was fucking her hard and fast, but it was too much. Too raw. Too intimate. She felt too vulnerable, and she tried to lower her legs.

“No.” Keeping her legs close together, he leaned forward. “I like it this way. It makes you tighter. Makes you pay attention to me.”

The increase in pressure startled her. “Bo!”

He bucked at the sound of his name, and Andrea could hardly stand the pleasure. It felt naughty, exhibitionistic, and so damn good.

“That’s right, sweet thing. Give it to me. I’m the guy who’s meant to be your lover, not your handyman.”

But Bo has no character whatsoever. For that matter, Andrea isn’t much better with her inconsistent weirdness.

Bo is a jerk. He was mad that his neighbor didn’t call him when she was going to be home late or ask him to drive all the way to the college just to give him a ride. He was even more irritated that the coworker who dropped her off was male. Bo is her next door neighbor! Sure, they’re closer than most neighbors, but that doesn’t mean she needs to call him when she is a little bit late.

There’s an inch of depth that flickers beneath Bo’s otherwise boring flatness. His anger stems from worry and he’s insecure around Andrea. He doesn’t think he’s smart enough for her and in a moment of vulnerability asks her what he means to her.

It’s clear the two of them have history together. They have been neighbors for a while and Bo is always there to help with lawn mowing, giving her takeout, and doing repairs around the house. Andrea fantasizes about him at night but is scared to acknowledge her attraction to him. Bo seems to know it anyway and basically takes her on a picnic table with Andrea barely getting a consent out.

The lack of real consent is a huge turn-off for me. Just because he mows her lawn doesn’t mean he gets to, well, mow her lawn. There’s a difference between dominating and borderline-raping, and I wish that was much clearer here.

Andrea’s character is all over the place. She goes from caring to femme fatale in less than four thousand words.

At first, she’s slightly scared of Bo. She’s nervous and innocent for most of the story.

The tingle was back. Her entire body vibrated with anticipation and nerves. She’d never done anything like this. A thrill of uneasiness and excitement rushed through her

By the end, he’s just a fuck for her.

“Can we go inside now?” she asked, her lips brushing against his ear.

“On one condition. Tell me what I am to you.”

She smiled softly. “Oh honey, you’re the man I call when I need a ride.”

Where is this new found confidence of hers and when did she start calling him honey? Did her orgasm compel a man-eating ghost to possess her for the sake of reliving glory days?

We’ll never find out, because that’s where the story ends. There’s no real conclusion and just the flippant line to half-heartedly tie the ending and beginning together. It left me wholly unsatisfied.
  
First Man (2018)
First Man (2018)
2018 | Biography, Drama, History
GREAT, Visceral Space Scenes - Boring, Soap-Opera-ish Earth Scenes
Get to the largest screen you can find with the best sound system and check out FIRST MAN. The visceral spectacle of space travel is expertly captured and needs to be seen on the BIG screen while your chair vibrates from the sound. You, the audience, fwill eel like you are in the spaceship with Neil Armstrong on his way to the moon.

Too bad the Earth-bound moments of this film don't go to the same heights.

Directed by Damien Chazelle in his follow-up to his Oscar winning Directorial stint with LA LA LAND, FIRST MAN tells the story of Neil Armstrong in the 1960s, going from test pilot to the First Man who stepped foot on the moon.

As I stated earlier, the times that we are in the space capsule, or flight plane or test simulator with Armstrong are a visceral experience not to be missed. Chazelle puts his camera close in, often times seeing what Armstrong is seeing - most of that time with loud, shimming and shaking noises and shimming and shaking cameras that left me wonder how these Pioneers of Space Flight ever made it to the Moon and back safely. These scenes - and especially the last 1/2 hour of the film when Armstrong & Co. go to the moon - are worth the price of admission alone. Add on top of that a driving, visceral (there's that word again) score by Chazelle's musical collaborator Justin Hurwitz (Oscar winner for the music for LA LA LAND) and your heart will be thumping loudly in your chest during these exhilarating scenes.

And that is good, for Chazelle and screenwriter Josh Singer (SPOTLIGHT) try to squeeze in a Soap-Opera-esque plot and motivation for Armstrong throughout this film that just didn't work for me. They tried too hard to give Armstrong some "personal" motivations for being stoic, pragmatic and driven to his vision.

As for the acting, Ryan Gosling is...well...stoic, pragmatic and driven to his vision as Armstrong. Do you see that look on Gosling/Armstrong's face in the picture that is accompanying this review? You get that 90% of the time with him. Most of the other actors - Jason Clarke, Kyle Chandler, Pablo Schreiber, Ethan Embry, Lukas Haas - all give the same stoic, pragmatic performance, so there is no real personality here. Even the great Ciaran Hinds - who normally can chew scenery with the best of them - was toned way down to stoic, pragmatic proportions.

This made the performance of Corey Stoll as Buzz Aldrin all the more jarring for he bursts into this film at about the halfway point, cracking jokes and having a personality. Unfortunately, this was annoying at this point, rather than refreshing and I ended up thinking what a jerk Aldrin is.

Add to that Claire Foy (THE CROWN) as Armstrong's wife who has a constant pained expression on her face. She will get an Oscar nomination, for she had the big "Oscars" speech as the worried wife and mother - a speech where Gosling/Armstrong looked at her pragmatically and with solid stoicism.

Fortunately, what saves this movie is that these Earth-bound scenes of fairly boring people in cliched situations are quickly wiped away with awe-inspiring action pieces - they really are worth the price of admission - even the higher price you will need to pay to see it in IMAX with a kick-butt sound system.

Letter Grade: B+

7 1/2 (out of 10) stars - have I mentioned how great the space scenes in this film are?

And you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis)
  
The Summer of New Beginnings (Magnolia Grove #1)
The Summer of New Beginnings (Magnolia Grove #1)
Bette Lee Crosby | 2018 | Fiction & Poetry
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Very Realistic Characters (3 more)
Well Written Plot
True Life Events
A Feel Good Story
All the Feels!
I had heard of the author Bette Lee Crosby before, and I had been meaning to read her books. Many people had actually recommended her books to me. After a Facebook live party, I finally decided to read her women's fiction novel The Summer of New Beginnings. I'm glad I did because it was so good!

The pacing moved at a very relaxing, consistent style. Not once did I grow bored wishing the pacing, nor did I find myself too lost because it was too fast. The pacing was just perfect.

I enjoyed the plot and world building of The Summer of New Beginnings very much. It felt very true to life and very believable. I won't rehash the book synopsis because it describes what happens so beautifully. I loved watching the sisters grow and seeing how they dealt with the hardships the life threw at them. Although this book is mostly focuses on Meghan, the younger sister, The Summer of New Beginnings gives us glimpses into how older sister Tracey is dealing with her problems (and boy, does she have a big one in the form of Dominic) as well as the girls' mother Lila having to deal with her husband's death and looking after her girls. Miss Crosby had me hanging on every word she had written in this book. The way she writes is magical! I was instantly transported to the world of Magnolia Grove every time I would start reading The Summer of New Beginnings.

Every single character in The Summer of New Beginnings, whether they were minor or major, felt like a very real person. I would even dare to say that characters in this book felt more alive than any other book I have read! I loved every character in The Summer of New Beginnings, except for Dominic, but only because he was a jerk, not due to how he was written! Meghan was definitely my favorite. I loved her caring attitude and how she always made sure everyone was taken care of. She was so loving and selfless. I also loved Sox. He sounded so adorable and sweet. I wanted to just snuggle with him myself. I loved reading about Tracey finally taking some responsibility although it's a shame she had to put up with what she did. Lila was such a lovely mother doting on her girls no matter how old they were or what they had done wrong. Tom was such a nice guy. It was hard to find fault with him, and I never did! Gabriel had overcome something major, and it was nice to see him give back to his community to help out. Lucas was so sweet. I fell in love with that little boy right away. It probably helps that I have a little boy of my own too, ha! As I've said before, all of the characters in The Summer of New Beginnings were fantastic!

The Summer of New Beginnings is a pretty clean read. Nothing was too graphic or drawn out. Trigger warnings include kissing (not steamy), mild swearing (only a couple of minor swear words that I noticed), drinking (only a glass of wine here and there and Dominic being drunk a few times), and the death of Meghan's father in the beginning of the book.

Overall, The Summer of New Beginnings is just a feel good read. It's just super sweet, and the whole book is written beautifully. I would definitely recommend The Summer of New Beginnings by Bette Lee Crosby to everyone aged 15+. I know it is considered Women's Fiction, but I think a lot of men who read would like this one too.
  
Father Figures (2018)
Father Figures (2018)
2018 | Comedy
Expectations, all of us have them and occasionally our expectations live up to exactly as we assume they will; other times, we are wrong. The movie Father Figures, a comedy film directed by Lawrence Sher and written by Justin Malen is not only about two brothers searching for their biological father, but the journey and the expectations that go along with the journey.

Peter Reynolds (Ed Helms) is a man who is disenchanted with his life. He’s a doctor who’s still struggling with his divorce from three years ago, and the prospects of connecting with a son who wants nothing to do with him. His fraternal twin brother Kyle, on the other hand, has the picture-perfect life. Wealthy for being nothing more than a surf bum on the beach and being at the right place at the right time; with a new baby on the way with his long-term (6 month) relationship.

An unlikely event opens Peter’s eyes to the life he has known; a life where the father he believed to be his died of colon cancer, which dictated his career and life choices. The event exposed the lies that their mother had told them and the man they believed to be their father all along, never was.

The realization sends the two brothers on a mission to discover who their real father is, and also discover a bit about themselves along the way. Their journey of discovery will take them from Florida to Massachusetts, and several places in-between. All of this, with of hopes of unraveling the mystery of who their real father is and what role, if any, he could fill in their existing lives.

Ed Helms, portrays his character brilliantly. A man who is kind, good-hearted and responsible. The one who even with all his good intentions, never feels like he is able to get ahead. Owen Wilson plays what I feel is one of his best roles to date, as the ying to Ed Helms yang, the happy-go-lucky, never have a care in the world character. The two have a chemistry on the screen that draws you into their personal struggles with lots of laughter along the way.

The cast of “fathers”, are all brilliantly portrayed, whether it’s Terry Bradshaw portraying himself; J. K. Simons, as the lovable “jerk”; and the always talented Christopher Walken as the family veterinarian Dr. Walter Tinkler. Glenn Close does an absolutely amazing performance as the brother’s mother Helen Baxter.

There are plenty of laughs to be had through the movie, but it’s the amount of heart that the movie shows that really drew me in. As I spoke in the beginning, about expectations, I myself had expectations that the movie would be just another slap-stick comedy, with the characters getting into one hilarious situation after another. While this certainly did happen (it is still a comedy after-all), none of the bits seemed outrageous or done for the sake of shock value. As with most movies that fall into this genre, there are scenes which some may feel provided nothing to the story, and were there simply for adolescent humor or to justify the R rating, but none of these detracted from the film as a whole. I didn’t expect to come out of this movie not only quoting some of the very memorable lines, but also reflecting on where their journey began and where it ended.

Father Figures is much more than a simple comedy, and it’s far more than simply a “who’s your daddy” adventure. It’s a movie about self-discovery and more importantly, the journey to get you there. The folks at Warner Bros. Pictures should be commended on not only the casting of the roles, but for producing a story they can be proud of.
  
DP
Dead Perfect
6
6.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
My Summary: Shannah is going to die. She has a blood disease that none of the doctors can identify, and she only has months to live. She’s on her last month, possibly her last week… she hates to think it’s her last day, but it sure feels like it. She has been watching the strange tall, dark (and hansom) man for several months, and is convinced that he is a vampire (though she’s not exactly sane when she makes that decision). She goes to him seeking immortality, but collapses in near death on his front porch. When she wakes up, she feels better. What did he do that healed her? She’s not a vampire, but even the doctors couldn’t heal her… then there’s the fact that she’s pretty sure that she’s falling in love with him. but Ronan’s healing doesn’t last forever… and Shannah has to make a hard choice.

Ronan is five hundred and thirteen years old. He has never loved anyone in his life, but when Shannah comes to his door he takes her into his house and begins to heal her in his own special way. But then he accidentally falls in love with her. That causes problems—when your mortal soulmate is going to die soon and she isn’t sure she wants to be a leach her whole life. If he changes her against her will, will she hate him forever? Are his only choices letting her die and losing her, or changing her and losing her?

And then there’s that whole problem with a vampire hunter tracking down Ronan… and trying to kill him.

My Thoughts—at first glimpse, this seemed so twilight-ish. But once I started reading it I got out of my vampire stereotype and enjoyed this book quite a lot. I was at the library and dying for a light-hearted vampire romance (because I was just in that mood) so I picked it up. It’s a very quick read, and very sweet.

The Plot—the plot moved quickly, though at one point a thought crossed my mind, “there isn’t much story here, how is the author dragging it out into 345 pages and is still managing to keep it interesting?” although the plot seemed a little simple, it held my attention very well.

The Characters—I loved the characters in this book. Shannah was depicted as a desperate-to-do-anything-to-keep-alive kind of girl, to the point that she was willing to live with a vampire. Ronan had so much passion and love for this poor girl that it made him endearing. I love how he’d always call her “love.” It was so sweet. Jim Hewitt, the hunter, was a character that you just didn’t like one bit—a strong willed jerk who, although he thought he was doing the right thing, even that he was doing it to keep Shannah safe, I didn’t like him and I felt sorry for him. Though, in my opinion, I liked what happened to him at the end ;)

The writing—There were a lot of really good descriptions in this book, I was able to see everything that the author said in beautiful detail. There wasn’t any graphic sex, though there were a few scenes at the end, but it was brief. There were a few re-used phrases in the book though, and that gets annoying. (My sister and I call this the JMG Syndrome, or “Jenny McGrady” syndrome, because of a series we read when we were younger. Jenny was always feeling “like she got slugged in the stomach”. The phrase was used several times in all fifteen books. It got old really fast.) Shannah had many kissed “brushed across her brow” in this book. But besides that, the writing was warm and welcoming.

My Recommendation: I recommend this book to anyone who likes a good paranormal romance, vampires, or just a romance in general. Ages 16+, only because of the frequency of sex at the end of the book (though I will say that the vampire held fast to abstinence, so that was encouraging.) there wasn’t any foul language, and I really liked that! I hate books that have so much language that I feel dirty reading it. But this book was very clean.

~Haleyknitz
  
The Green Hornet (2011)
The Green Hornet (2011)
2011 | Action, Comedy, Sci-Fi
4
5.5 (15 Ratings)
Movie Rating
I don't even have the words for how infuriated I am right now with The Green Hornet film. There's a small part of me that wishes I could just throw a brick at Seth Rogen's crotch right now, because he absolutely deserves it along with director Michael Gondry. That's right, the director of the film Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind which to me was a good movie is responsible for this equally terrible movie.
 I do feel much of the blame lies with the fact that Seth Rogen co-wrote this screenplay and he claimed that he was so glad he didn't screw up one of his favorite childhood heroes. Seth, Seth, Seth....tsk tsk, someone's a dirty rotten liar Seth. Why must you constantly lie to us Seth? The truth is you messed up completely! In the original radio show, comics, and T.V. Show Britt Reid wasn't a moron. He was a smart successful newspaper publisher, he was confident, and he could fight well alongside his equally confident sidekick Kato. I loved the T.V. show and I loved the comic. I loved watching The Green Hornet on Kung Fu Saturday when I was a kid. That was the highlight of my Saturday. I would watch a couple of episodes of The Green Hornet and then watch the featured kung fu film. That's a sacred childhood memory and you, Seth Rogen along with your director have pissed all over it.
Not only did you make Britt Reid a total jerk, you made him stupid too! He loosely based Britt Reid on Paris Hilton? Are you kidding me with this nonsense?
 Seth Rogen's Britt Reid is a spoiled rich brat who shows no interest in running the newspaper, but he instead becomes buddies with Kato his mechanic and coffee maker. I felt bad for Jay Chou because he's no Bruce Lee, but he did alright in spite of Seth Rogen constantly hyperventilating and shouting in every scene. He tried, he really did. Cameron Diaz's role as Reid's secretary Lenore Case is completely useless. She's basically camera filler with a great smile.
 Of course, The Green Hornet has to have a villain and that is Christoph Waltz (Oscar winner from Inglorious Basterds) as Chudnofsky, but there is no depth to the character which proves bad writing is bad writing. Now I like action scenes as much as the next person, but it's as if Seth Rogen got bored and just added as much action as possible as filler rather than having an actual plot that tells the story. There's also so much pointless dialogue, watching this train wreck of a film is like being stuck in a dentist's chair having a root canal with no anesthesia. Yes, it's that damn bad. Not even the overpriced 3-D could save this film. That is just a gimmick to get more money out of people and this film proved that point real quick.
 There is so much that could have been done to make this film version of the T.V. show great, but none of it was done. Instead, we get a film that is so terrible with no plot at all, a fake Britt Reid (I don't care what you say Rogen, that character you played was NOT Britt Reid! You are a liar sir!), a subdued Kato that got overshadowed by the crazy rich brat, a useless vapid secretary, and a villain that's about as threatening as a labradoodle. Seth Rogen and Michale Gondry you should be ashamed and embarrassed that your names are on this piece of trash.
 Don't waste your money on this folks and certainly don't waste it on 3-D. The original is better and I'm sure that Mr. Rogen's going to have several bricks thrown at his crotch for even writing this awful screenplay. Just please, do us a favor and go sit in the corner with M. Night Shyamalan and quit making movies, because you really screwed the pooch on this one pal.