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Gareth von Kallenbach (980 KP) rated Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) in Movies
Aug 6, 2019
I’m kind of like everyone else out there. I grew up with the Ninja Turtles. I loved the cartoons, the comics and most of all the toys. I remember the pizza shooter. Boy, did I get into some trouble with that. When the movie came out in 1990, I begged and begged by father to take me to it until he finally did. I loved that movie! And while it may not for most, it still hold up for me today.
I wish that I could speak with as much enthusiasm about 2014’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The truth is, as I sat there and watched I found myself shaking my head “no” more often than not over the course of the hour and a half. My worst fears for the movie came true, and I am ashamed of what this may do to the franchise. And be warned, there are most definitely spoilers ahead.
TMNT is about a “gang” called the Foot Clan, who are robbing chemical shipments, banks and all sorts of places in New York City. April O’Neil, a local news reporter, is looking to make a big break and thinks she may have found it as she happens upon a robbery in progress by the Foot Clan. But before she could any good pictures or footage, mysterious vigilantes show up and save the day. This leads her to investigate and find out that none other than our favorite heroes in the half shell are said vigilantes. We find out that the partner of Shredder, the head of the Foot Clan, was running experiments using a chemical compound not of this world. They were injecting, you guessed it, four turtles and a rat. Now the turtles must stop the Foot Clan from carrying out there ultimate plan, which leads us to a final showdown between our heroes and Shredder.
First off, bad move changing the origin story like that. A mutagen made from an alien compound? It totally lacks credibility especially as it is only slight referenced in one scene, and then never spoken of again. Plus, losing “the ooze” origin totally closes doors (though maybe not all the way) on other characters in the TMNT universe (i.e. BeBop and Rocksteady). It’s just really lame to see them veer away from what was tried and true.
The turtles themselves, their new look actually grew on me. I think that some of the accessories may have been a little overboard, but the basics were there. I especially liked that the bandanas weren’t identical. However, the look is where it ended for me. I do not think that they cast the voices right. It just didn’t sound like they are supposed to sound. We’ve had the iconic voices from animated series to the old series of movies that just stand out. I didn’t get that here.
Also, I just don’t get the deal with Megan Fox. I get that some guys find her attractive, but that doesn’t mean she can act. She was the absolute worst choice for April O’Neil. She just didn’t look the part. Maybe Michael Bay was trying to prove a point about the rumors going around for why she wasn’t in Transformers 3. Will Arnett, however, did an excellent job as Vern Fenwick, O’Neil’s camera man. He had some great comedic timing and relief from the action sequences.
If you ask me, they showed Shredder’s face way too early in the movie. And then they way overdid him, right off the get go. Shredder was a formidable foe because of his cunningness and martial arts expertise. But ladies and gentleman, they introduce Super Shredder almost immediately off the bat. Or, as I like to call him in this film, Swiss Army Shredder. He looked like a freaking Transformer, in the worst way. I swear I even heard the Transformer sound when he jumped and landed one time. They way, way over did it. I know, I’ve already said this. But it seems to be a theme of the night.
I walked out of the film wishing I had never agreed to do this. Unfortunately, though, someone’s got to take one for the team. And if it means that I can warn others, than I am glad to have done it. The movie was entirely bad; there were a couple of funny moments. It just saddens me to think that this will be some people’s first exposure to what was always such an awesome universe. I will most definitely not be picking this up on Blu-ray. I will, however, be watching 1990’ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Now, I understand that some of you may see me as being a fan boy obsessing over nostalgia. But if you have read any of my reviews, you know that I always am kinder and look for the entertainment value of movies. This movie just made me sad. But if you don’t believe me, or doubt my opinion… go check it out. You’ll wish you hadn’t.
I wish that I could speak with as much enthusiasm about 2014’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The truth is, as I sat there and watched I found myself shaking my head “no” more often than not over the course of the hour and a half. My worst fears for the movie came true, and I am ashamed of what this may do to the franchise. And be warned, there are most definitely spoilers ahead.
TMNT is about a “gang” called the Foot Clan, who are robbing chemical shipments, banks and all sorts of places in New York City. April O’Neil, a local news reporter, is looking to make a big break and thinks she may have found it as she happens upon a robbery in progress by the Foot Clan. But before she could any good pictures or footage, mysterious vigilantes show up and save the day. This leads her to investigate and find out that none other than our favorite heroes in the half shell are said vigilantes. We find out that the partner of Shredder, the head of the Foot Clan, was running experiments using a chemical compound not of this world. They were injecting, you guessed it, four turtles and a rat. Now the turtles must stop the Foot Clan from carrying out there ultimate plan, which leads us to a final showdown between our heroes and Shredder.
First off, bad move changing the origin story like that. A mutagen made from an alien compound? It totally lacks credibility especially as it is only slight referenced in one scene, and then never spoken of again. Plus, losing “the ooze” origin totally closes doors (though maybe not all the way) on other characters in the TMNT universe (i.e. BeBop and Rocksteady). It’s just really lame to see them veer away from what was tried and true.
The turtles themselves, their new look actually grew on me. I think that some of the accessories may have been a little overboard, but the basics were there. I especially liked that the bandanas weren’t identical. However, the look is where it ended for me. I do not think that they cast the voices right. It just didn’t sound like they are supposed to sound. We’ve had the iconic voices from animated series to the old series of movies that just stand out. I didn’t get that here.
Also, I just don’t get the deal with Megan Fox. I get that some guys find her attractive, but that doesn’t mean she can act. She was the absolute worst choice for April O’Neil. She just didn’t look the part. Maybe Michael Bay was trying to prove a point about the rumors going around for why she wasn’t in Transformers 3. Will Arnett, however, did an excellent job as Vern Fenwick, O’Neil’s camera man. He had some great comedic timing and relief from the action sequences.
If you ask me, they showed Shredder’s face way too early in the movie. And then they way overdid him, right off the get go. Shredder was a formidable foe because of his cunningness and martial arts expertise. But ladies and gentleman, they introduce Super Shredder almost immediately off the bat. Or, as I like to call him in this film, Swiss Army Shredder. He looked like a freaking Transformer, in the worst way. I swear I even heard the Transformer sound when he jumped and landed one time. They way, way over did it. I know, I’ve already said this. But it seems to be a theme of the night.
I walked out of the film wishing I had never agreed to do this. Unfortunately, though, someone’s got to take one for the team. And if it means that I can warn others, than I am glad to have done it. The movie was entirely bad; there were a couple of funny moments. It just saddens me to think that this will be some people’s first exposure to what was always such an awesome universe. I will most definitely not be picking this up on Blu-ray. I will, however, be watching 1990’ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Now, I understand that some of you may see me as being a fan boy obsessing over nostalgia. But if you have read any of my reviews, you know that I always am kinder and look for the entertainment value of movies. This movie just made me sad. But if you don’t believe me, or doubt my opinion… go check it out. You’ll wish you hadn’t.
Sophia (Bookwyrming Thoughts) (530 KP) rated Killer of Enemies (Killer of Enemies, #1) in Books
Jan 23, 2020
Original Rating: 3.5 out of 5
This review and more can be found at <a href="http://www.bookwyrmingthoughts.com/2015/07/review-killer-of-enemies-by-joseph-bruchac.html">Bookwyrming Thoughts</a>
I never thought I would ever come across a book that dumps information on you AND like it.
With a post-apocalyptic world where people are ruled over genetically modified people who are barely human anymore, Joseph Bruchac has obviously planned this book very well and vividly, even with the amount of information he dumps on you for most of the book. I find that the information dump actually goes very well with the amount of action there is. Take away all of the information, and you'll be left with an empty husk of a book that is just full of nonstop action, which would definitely backfire big time on the author because it would be pretty undeveloped.
Bruchac is very detail-oriented throughout the book it's not just the information being dumped. Lozen, our main character who is a monster hunter for the genetically modified people ruling over her home, apparently goes into excruciating detail about some things, such as talking about someone's body odor or eating a monster's heart (that was gross).
Killer of Enemies also promotes diversity in the young adult genre Lozen is a Native American, and I can honestly say I have never had a Native American in any book I've read so far until now. There are hints of Native American traditions and culture woven throughout, and I find that it's probably one of the reasons why I actually enjoyed this a lot more than I would have without the Native American aspect.
Despite how awesome and diverse Killer of Enemies, there were just some things that knocked down some points. Throughout the information dumping, I don't think Bruchac actually mentions why or how the four rulers of Haven actually got their names. The Dreamer and Lady Time make sense, but the Jester doesn't really make sense, and Diablita Loca (how do you even say that?) makes no sense whatsoever.
There also doesn't seem to be a purpose, and while there does seem to be one, I just can't really tell at all. The entire book is pretty much described in less than ten words: hunting weird monsters, telling stories, flashbacks, and information dump.
I did, however, like how Bruchac ends Killer of Enemies by saying something along the lines of, "Just because this story is over doesn't mean everything is now peachy and happily ever after. It's just uncertain, but right now, everything is great."
This review and more can be found at <a href="http://www.bookwyrmingthoughts.com/2015/07/review-killer-of-enemies-by-joseph-bruchac.html">Bookwyrming Thoughts</a>
I never thought I would ever come across a book that dumps information on you AND like it.
With a post-apocalyptic world where people are ruled over genetically modified people who are barely human anymore, Joseph Bruchac has obviously planned this book very well and vividly, even with the amount of information he dumps on you for most of the book. I find that the information dump actually goes very well with the amount of action there is. Take away all of the information, and you'll be left with an empty husk of a book that is just full of nonstop action, which would definitely backfire big time on the author because it would be pretty undeveloped.
Bruchac is very detail-oriented throughout the book it's not just the information being dumped. Lozen, our main character who is a monster hunter for the genetically modified people ruling over her home, apparently goes into excruciating detail about some things, such as talking about someone's body odor or eating a monster's heart (that was gross).
Killer of Enemies also promotes diversity in the young adult genre Lozen is a Native American, and I can honestly say I have never had a Native American in any book I've read so far until now. There are hints of Native American traditions and culture woven throughout, and I find that it's probably one of the reasons why I actually enjoyed this a lot more than I would have without the Native American aspect.
Despite how awesome and diverse Killer of Enemies, there were just some things that knocked down some points. Throughout the information dumping, I don't think Bruchac actually mentions why or how the four rulers of Haven actually got their names. The Dreamer and Lady Time make sense, but the Jester doesn't really make sense, and Diablita Loca (how do you even say that?) makes no sense whatsoever.
There also doesn't seem to be a purpose, and while there does seem to be one, I just can't really tell at all. The entire book is pretty much described in less than ten words: hunting weird monsters, telling stories, flashbacks, and information dump.
I did, however, like how Bruchac ends Killer of Enemies by saying something along the lines of, "Just because this story is over doesn't mean everything is now peachy and happily ever after. It's just uncertain, but right now, everything is great."
Molly J (Cover To Cover Cafe) (106 KP) rated A Love Surrendered (Winds of Change, #3) in Books
Feb 27, 2019
*This review is from my blog and originally published in 2012*
This is going to be a hard review for me to write. No,no, it’s not a bad book. It’s one of my favorites. It’s bittersweet because this is the ending to one of my favorite Christian Fiction series. I fell in love with Ms. Lessman’s work when I read book 1 in this series, A Hope Undaunted. Ironically, it’s not the first in the O’Connor clans stories…there was a series previously written called The Daughters Of Boston. This particular series is so emotionally moving, so deeply intense that you get to become a part of the story. You can feel yourself being pulled deep into the heart of the story, becoming the characters, feeling every pain, every laugh, and every tear drop that falls. It’s absolutely an amazing feeling when reading a Julie Lessman novel.
I’ve been dying to read this book. This one is Steven O’Connor’s story. He’s the baby boy of the O’Connor family and, while I adored each of the others that I read about, I felt that Steven was the most deserving of having his story told. He was quietly awaiting his turn through out all the other books and it’s finally here! And oh what a turn it is! We get a bit of background on Steven in the other books, having a broken relationship with his ex fiance. Now, he’s a respectable man of the law and 25 years old. What he’s not expecting is for the arrival of Annie, a young impressionable girl of 17…..and his former fiance’s baby sister. Or the protectiveness he feels for her.
Susannah “Annie” Kennedy has left her home in Iowa to move on from her past and embrace a future in Boston. Her parents are dead now, her sister has raved about Boston and she’s ready to embrace a life out side of her straight and narrow past. When an circumstance arises and Annie finds herself face to face with Steven O’Connor, her sisters ex, she’s embarrassed…..and highly attracted to him! There’s just one little problem with that….he doesn’t realize that she’s Maggie’s baby sister.
Watching as these two came to terms with their past, and seeking forgiveness to over come it, and move on to a life filled with love and happiness was absolutely tear jerking! I loved every minute of this amazing 5 Book conclusion to my favorite series. Ms. Lessman kept the intensity woven through out as she did with the previous books. Her messages of forgiveness, letting go and seeking His love are just as strong and sweep through the reader instantly. If you love passion, if you love heartbreaking redemption and amazing historic detail, then look no further than the author who can create an unforgettable, un-put-downable novel that will spin the readers mind out of control. Well done Ms. Lessman and I am anxious to see what you have in story for your fans next…will we get glimpses of the O’Connor’s? Will we get to fall in love with another amazing family? Keep up the amazing writing, Ms. Lessman!
This is going to be a hard review for me to write. No,no, it’s not a bad book. It’s one of my favorites. It’s bittersweet because this is the ending to one of my favorite Christian Fiction series. I fell in love with Ms. Lessman’s work when I read book 1 in this series, A Hope Undaunted. Ironically, it’s not the first in the O’Connor clans stories…there was a series previously written called The Daughters Of Boston. This particular series is so emotionally moving, so deeply intense that you get to become a part of the story. You can feel yourself being pulled deep into the heart of the story, becoming the characters, feeling every pain, every laugh, and every tear drop that falls. It’s absolutely an amazing feeling when reading a Julie Lessman novel.
I’ve been dying to read this book. This one is Steven O’Connor’s story. He’s the baby boy of the O’Connor family and, while I adored each of the others that I read about, I felt that Steven was the most deserving of having his story told. He was quietly awaiting his turn through out all the other books and it’s finally here! And oh what a turn it is! We get a bit of background on Steven in the other books, having a broken relationship with his ex fiance. Now, he’s a respectable man of the law and 25 years old. What he’s not expecting is for the arrival of Annie, a young impressionable girl of 17…..and his former fiance’s baby sister. Or the protectiveness he feels for her.
Susannah “Annie” Kennedy has left her home in Iowa to move on from her past and embrace a future in Boston. Her parents are dead now, her sister has raved about Boston and she’s ready to embrace a life out side of her straight and narrow past. When an circumstance arises and Annie finds herself face to face with Steven O’Connor, her sisters ex, she’s embarrassed…..and highly attracted to him! There’s just one little problem with that….he doesn’t realize that she’s Maggie’s baby sister.
Watching as these two came to terms with their past, and seeking forgiveness to over come it, and move on to a life filled with love and happiness was absolutely tear jerking! I loved every minute of this amazing 5 Book conclusion to my favorite series. Ms. Lessman kept the intensity woven through out as she did with the previous books. Her messages of forgiveness, letting go and seeking His love are just as strong and sweep through the reader instantly. If you love passion, if you love heartbreaking redemption and amazing historic detail, then look no further than the author who can create an unforgettable, un-put-downable novel that will spin the readers mind out of control. Well done Ms. Lessman and I am anxious to see what you have in story for your fans next…will we get glimpses of the O’Connor’s? Will we get to fall in love with another amazing family? Keep up the amazing writing, Ms. Lessman!
Kara Skinner (332 KP) rated The Robber Knight in Books
Sep 10, 2019
When you are fighting for the freedom of your people, falling in love with your enemy is not a great idea. Or is it? Ayla has to defend her castle and her people all on her own, with nobody to help her but a dark warrior she hates with all her heart.
Sir Reuben, the dreaded robber knight, has long been Ayla’s deadliest enemy. He has prayed on her and her people ever since her father fell ill, and she swore he would hang for his crimes. Now they are both trapped in her castle as the army of a far greater enemy approaches, and they have only one chance: stand together, or fall.
This book wasn’t bad, honestly. I’m a huge fan of historical fiction, and it had been awhile since I’ve read a medieval love story, so that was a nice change of pace.
The author is a historian, so there are a lot of little things in this book that you don’t see in a lot of other historical romance books. For instance,you can’t pull out arrows because there are often barbs attached to cause fatal wounds if pulled out. I did like learning about all of these facts. But sometimes Thier lets the historian in him gets the best of him, but more on that later.
Lady Ayla was a pretty interesting character. Headstrong and wise for her years, she is very noble and progressive. She has all of the makings for a great leader– with the exception of knowledge. I loved how kind and committed she was to her people and I love the fact that she has some spunk. I mean, if I’m getting robbed in the forest by this random stranger, then I hope I would swear him out too (of course, if I could beat him up and get away, then that’s even better, but Ayla doesn’t have much self-defense skills). But there were many times that she was annoying, like her insistence on being near battles, even before she started treating the sick. And how she tried to manage Sir Isenbard during battle. She had called on him for help because he was an experienced knight, and now she was questioning his commands and strategies in the heat of battle!
Mostly, though, I really did like Ayla. She defines the idea of nobility. With war inevitable, she’s willing to ride personally to the edges of her land to warn her subjects and she is always at the outskirts of battle to help care for the wounded. She invites everyone into the castle for their safety and rations herself as well as the others to conserve food. She’s even willing to corrupt herself to save her people.
Reuben is an excellent character as well, although it did take me awhile to like him. In the beginning he fell a little flat. It’s clear that he used to be a knight but something happened and now he robs people for his own greed. A near-death experience and being saved by Lady Ayla reawakens the humanity in him. And apparently also some depth.
In the beginning of the book he spends a lot of his time admiring his loot and laughing about his victims, who thought they had a right to steal from him. But that’s all he does. We have no real insight into his character or backstory until after he’s in Ayla’s care. Only then are there hints of a bad history where he had been arrested many times, been tortured, and had at one point been a member of respectable society. If it weren’t for the fact that I liked Ayla’a character and the plot so far, I probably would have stopped reading.
Thier is a writer who has really good potential in becoming a great romance writer, especially for historical fiction. The plots have some unique twists that are augmented by his knowledge of history and after Reuben’s character shaped up, he was an excellent love interest. But there is one huge problem with this story: the footnotes.
There are so many footnotes throughout most of the book that I feel like I’m reading a history textbook, which is not good when I usually read romance novels to take a break from homework. Not only are they distracting and unnecessary, but they are also rude and condescending. Sure, sometimes they were useful, like in explaining the references to the seven princes of hell. Another one was a pretty funny anecdote about how one of his readers had actually confirmed that lard burns and that burning arrows work because they had actually done it. There is also a lot of wit throughout the footnotes which is pretty amusing. But most of the time, they were annoying.
For instance, Robert Thier thought it was necessary to include a footnote about how witches were considered bad during medieval times. Seriously? Even if someone failed history, we know that witches are not considered fine, upstanding citizens. Or maybe he thinks all of us have been locked in our rooms with no books, internet or television for our entire lives and for the month of October we all miraculously fell into a coma so we couldn’t see the giant blow-up witch in the neighbor’s yard. And then we’d all wake up singing Christmas carols after the month long coma without a care in the world because this happens every year so we don’t know what a witch is. (I’m developing a conspiracy theory about how these strange comas was caused by witchcraft.)
Maybe Thier assumed that instead of us thinking Reuben was scared of witches when he wondered if Ayla was one, we just thought he was commenting on how much Ayla looked like Sandra Bullock.
And one of the footnotes was just plain offensive. Here is the line of text that the footnote is attached to: “Heel! Abominable villain! You dare defy me?” (page 74)
Now, here’s the footnote: “Sorry to disappoint the ladies, but this doesn’t refer to high heels. It is a medieval term for a very nasty person.”
Excuse me? Did you just assume that I thought it meant high heels and that would make me excited? What world do you live in?
Apparently he thinks “the ladies” are so dumb that we are incapable of taking context clues and we immediately think everything relates back to fashion. Maybe I didn’t know it meant “very nasty person”, but it’s pretty clear it’s a swear or insult of sometime, not a freaking Jimmy Choo. Does he just imagine us thinking high heel every time we hear the word?
“She broke his nose with the heel of her hand.” Oh. High heel!
“Heel, fido! I said heel!” Oh. High heel!
“It will take one or two days for your cut to heal.” Oh. High heel! (Because if he thinks we don’t understand the difference between uncomfortable footwear and an insult, then he probably thinks we can’t spell, either).
But hey, at least Robert Thier thinks women can memorize stuff, because the footnote links stop as the vocabulary is repeated instead of new terms being introduced.
Aside from the footnotes, I really do like this book, and I can’t wait to read the second part of it, which I’ll read soon. Thier still has a long way to go, but I think after he has more experience, he’ll write some great books.
Sir Reuben, the dreaded robber knight, has long been Ayla’s deadliest enemy. He has prayed on her and her people ever since her father fell ill, and she swore he would hang for his crimes. Now they are both trapped in her castle as the army of a far greater enemy approaches, and they have only one chance: stand together, or fall.
This book wasn’t bad, honestly. I’m a huge fan of historical fiction, and it had been awhile since I’ve read a medieval love story, so that was a nice change of pace.
The author is a historian, so there are a lot of little things in this book that you don’t see in a lot of other historical romance books. For instance,you can’t pull out arrows because there are often barbs attached to cause fatal wounds if pulled out. I did like learning about all of these facts. But sometimes Thier lets the historian in him gets the best of him, but more on that later.
Lady Ayla was a pretty interesting character. Headstrong and wise for her years, she is very noble and progressive. She has all of the makings for a great leader– with the exception of knowledge. I loved how kind and committed she was to her people and I love the fact that she has some spunk. I mean, if I’m getting robbed in the forest by this random stranger, then I hope I would swear him out too (of course, if I could beat him up and get away, then that’s even better, but Ayla doesn’t have much self-defense skills). But there were many times that she was annoying, like her insistence on being near battles, even before she started treating the sick. And how she tried to manage Sir Isenbard during battle. She had called on him for help because he was an experienced knight, and now she was questioning his commands and strategies in the heat of battle!
Mostly, though, I really did like Ayla. She defines the idea of nobility. With war inevitable, she’s willing to ride personally to the edges of her land to warn her subjects and she is always at the outskirts of battle to help care for the wounded. She invites everyone into the castle for their safety and rations herself as well as the others to conserve food. She’s even willing to corrupt herself to save her people.
Reuben is an excellent character as well, although it did take me awhile to like him. In the beginning he fell a little flat. It’s clear that he used to be a knight but something happened and now he robs people for his own greed. A near-death experience and being saved by Lady Ayla reawakens the humanity in him. And apparently also some depth.
In the beginning of the book he spends a lot of his time admiring his loot and laughing about his victims, who thought they had a right to steal from him. But that’s all he does. We have no real insight into his character or backstory until after he’s in Ayla’s care. Only then are there hints of a bad history where he had been arrested many times, been tortured, and had at one point been a member of respectable society. If it weren’t for the fact that I liked Ayla’a character and the plot so far, I probably would have stopped reading.
Thier is a writer who has really good potential in becoming a great romance writer, especially for historical fiction. The plots have some unique twists that are augmented by his knowledge of history and after Reuben’s character shaped up, he was an excellent love interest. But there is one huge problem with this story: the footnotes.
There are so many footnotes throughout most of the book that I feel like I’m reading a history textbook, which is not good when I usually read romance novels to take a break from homework. Not only are they distracting and unnecessary, but they are also rude and condescending. Sure, sometimes they were useful, like in explaining the references to the seven princes of hell. Another one was a pretty funny anecdote about how one of his readers had actually confirmed that lard burns and that burning arrows work because they had actually done it. There is also a lot of wit throughout the footnotes which is pretty amusing. But most of the time, they were annoying.
For instance, Robert Thier thought it was necessary to include a footnote about how witches were considered bad during medieval times. Seriously? Even if someone failed history, we know that witches are not considered fine, upstanding citizens. Or maybe he thinks all of us have been locked in our rooms with no books, internet or television for our entire lives and for the month of October we all miraculously fell into a coma so we couldn’t see the giant blow-up witch in the neighbor’s yard. And then we’d all wake up singing Christmas carols after the month long coma without a care in the world because this happens every year so we don’t know what a witch is. (I’m developing a conspiracy theory about how these strange comas was caused by witchcraft.)
Maybe Thier assumed that instead of us thinking Reuben was scared of witches when he wondered if Ayla was one, we just thought he was commenting on how much Ayla looked like Sandra Bullock.
And one of the footnotes was just plain offensive. Here is the line of text that the footnote is attached to: “Heel! Abominable villain! You dare defy me?” (page 74)
Now, here’s the footnote: “Sorry to disappoint the ladies, but this doesn’t refer to high heels. It is a medieval term for a very nasty person.”
Excuse me? Did you just assume that I thought it meant high heels and that would make me excited? What world do you live in?
Apparently he thinks “the ladies” are so dumb that we are incapable of taking context clues and we immediately think everything relates back to fashion. Maybe I didn’t know it meant “very nasty person”, but it’s pretty clear it’s a swear or insult of sometime, not a freaking Jimmy Choo. Does he just imagine us thinking high heel every time we hear the word?
“She broke his nose with the heel of her hand.” Oh. High heel!
“Heel, fido! I said heel!” Oh. High heel!
“It will take one or two days for your cut to heal.” Oh. High heel! (Because if he thinks we don’t understand the difference between uncomfortable footwear and an insult, then he probably thinks we can’t spell, either).
But hey, at least Robert Thier thinks women can memorize stuff, because the footnote links stop as the vocabulary is repeated instead of new terms being introduced.
Aside from the footnotes, I really do like this book, and I can’t wait to read the second part of it, which I’ll read soon. Thier still has a long way to go, but I think after he has more experience, he’ll write some great books.
Kristy H (1252 KP) rated My Dark Vanessa in Books
Mar 19, 2020
At fifteen, the very bright Vanessa Wye earns a scholarship position to boarding school. It's the year 2000. There she meets Jacob Strane, her English teacher, who is forty-two-years-old. Soon the two are involved in a powerful relationship--and one that quickly turns sexual. Seventeen years later, Vanessa is working as a concierge at a hotel, just another in a series of dead-end jobs. She hasn't had any real serious relationships. And now, Jacob Strane, has been accused of sexual abuse by a former student, Taylor Birch. Taylor tracks down Vanessa, wanting her to share her story, too. But Vanessa doesn't feel she was abused by Strane. In fact, her entire life is framed by her love story with Strane. As Taylor Birch's story gains traction in the press, Vanessa must confront her past and what it means to her.
"'I'm going to ruin you.' He says it with obvious torment, a glimpse into how much he's thought about it, wrestled with it."
This book...wow. I was absolutely captivated by Vanessa's story. She tells her tale in two parts: her adolescence, as she meets Jacob Strane at school and they begin their relationship; and then the present, as Taylor Birch's story hits the press and Vanessa must deal with the fact that her love for Jacob Strane is being portrayed as abuse and assault.
"It's strange to know that whenever I remember myself at fifteen, I'll think of this."
For a book with such dark subject matter, it's really beautiful. Russell is a wonderful writer, and this story unfolds almost lyrically. It's so well-done and completely mesmerizing. The sections featuring young Vanessa capture that early adolescent yearning and longing so perfectly--that deep desire to feel needed and wanted. To Vanessa, this is a love story, a romantic tale of a man needing and loving her. She blocks out and overlooks the parts of the story that don't fit. Understanding that some victims don't see abuse as abuse is key to the story, and Russell portrays the dynamic between Strane and Vanessa so well.
"'It's just my luck,' he said, 'that when I finally find my soul mate, she's fifteen years old.'"
As a result, we get a very thoughtful look at abuse, rape, and assault. And, yes, the sections of older Vanessa's story touch across the #metoo movement, as Taylor Birch and others want so desperately for Vanessa to join their side, to share her story. For them or for Vanessa, it's hard to say. This book is so dark, yet so insightful. Vanessa's inner struggle--basically she's having to re-look at the entire foundation upon which her life is built--is one of the most profoundly written and moving journeys I've seen in literature in quite some time. It's not easy to read about, certainly, and it's not always easy to understand her actions, of course. The story can make you uncomfortable; it can feel problematic. But it's an important read, and it's so beautifully and poetically written. I highly recommend it (taking into account the obvious trigger warnings, of course). 4.5+ stars.
"'I'm going to ruin you.' He says it with obvious torment, a glimpse into how much he's thought about it, wrestled with it."
This book...wow. I was absolutely captivated by Vanessa's story. She tells her tale in two parts: her adolescence, as she meets Jacob Strane at school and they begin their relationship; and then the present, as Taylor Birch's story hits the press and Vanessa must deal with the fact that her love for Jacob Strane is being portrayed as abuse and assault.
"It's strange to know that whenever I remember myself at fifteen, I'll think of this."
For a book with such dark subject matter, it's really beautiful. Russell is a wonderful writer, and this story unfolds almost lyrically. It's so well-done and completely mesmerizing. The sections featuring young Vanessa capture that early adolescent yearning and longing so perfectly--that deep desire to feel needed and wanted. To Vanessa, this is a love story, a romantic tale of a man needing and loving her. She blocks out and overlooks the parts of the story that don't fit. Understanding that some victims don't see abuse as abuse is key to the story, and Russell portrays the dynamic between Strane and Vanessa so well.
"'It's just my luck,' he said, 'that when I finally find my soul mate, she's fifteen years old.'"
As a result, we get a very thoughtful look at abuse, rape, and assault. And, yes, the sections of older Vanessa's story touch across the #metoo movement, as Taylor Birch and others want so desperately for Vanessa to join their side, to share her story. For them or for Vanessa, it's hard to say. This book is so dark, yet so insightful. Vanessa's inner struggle--basically she's having to re-look at the entire foundation upon which her life is built--is one of the most profoundly written and moving journeys I've seen in literature in quite some time. It's not easy to read about, certainly, and it's not always easy to understand her actions, of course. The story can make you uncomfortable; it can feel problematic. But it's an important read, and it's so beautifully and poetically written. I highly recommend it (taking into account the obvious trigger warnings, of course). 4.5+ stars.
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Kristy H (1252 KP) rated Detransition, Baby in Books
Jan 28, 2021
A meandering but insightful look into the lives of an interconnected trio
Reese and Amy nearly had it all--a loving relationship, an apartment, and safety in each other: something extremely difficult for trans women to find. But that all changes when Amy decides to detransition and become Ames. Now Reese feels lost and alone, turning to her old patterns of sleeping with men who treat her poorly. And Ames isn't particularly happy either, though he's found a sort of comfort in his relationship with his boss, Katrina. But when Katrina discovers she's pregnant--with Ames' child--Ames is forced to confront a lot of his fears about masculinity and fatherhood. He also wonders if it's a chance for family. Reese has always longed for a baby; could he, Reese, and Katrina raise this child together?
"Somewhere, somehow, Amy did the impossible. She got herself a baby."
I love that this diverse book was my 300th read for Netgalley. I love love love that there is a story about trans women being celebrated and heralded on "must read" lists. I enjoyed so much about this book. Reese and Amy are detailed and realistic characters who--to me at least--did not seem stereotypical or one-dimensional. I felt like I learned so much reading their raw, emotional, and lovely story.
The tale of Ames becoming a parent--and wanting to involve Reese--was an interesting and dynamic one for me. I could completely understand Reese's longing for motherhood and how she felt on the outside looking in. This part of the book was original and fascinating. Pieces of the story were utterly hilarious, despite some of the serious subject matter. There is a chapter where Reese attends an essential oils party with Katrina and other straight/cis women that made me laugh out loud. Peters captures her voice so perfectly. There's a vulnerability and realness to Reese that makes her a captivating character from the start.
"Reese had already diagnosed her own problem. She didn't know how to be alone. She fled from her own company, from her own solitude."
The hardest part for me about this book had nothing to do with its subject matter (if that's a problem for you, you're the problem), but the fact that it veers between the past and the present, going on tangents about Reese and Amy's past. Sometimes it seemed like it just needed a strong edit, with someone willing to strike about half of those passages. Or perhaps I just wanted to get on with the present, the impending baby, and Reese, Katrina, and Ames' story. I'm not sure. But I was nearly compelled to skim some of these long passages. It was just a lot. And then, after all that, the book just sort of ended, to me, without much resolution, and I felt a bit betrayed.
Still, do not get me wrong. This is an excellent and important story, and more such stories like this need to be told. I definitely recommend it, and I bet any forthcoming books from Peters will only get better and better. 3.5
Reese and Amy nearly had it all--a loving relationship, an apartment, and safety in each other: something extremely difficult for trans women to find. But that all changes when Amy decides to detransition and become Ames. Now Reese feels lost and alone, turning to her old patterns of sleeping with men who treat her poorly. And Ames isn't particularly happy either, though he's found a sort of comfort in his relationship with his boss, Katrina. But when Katrina discovers she's pregnant--with Ames' child--Ames is forced to confront a lot of his fears about masculinity and fatherhood. He also wonders if it's a chance for family. Reese has always longed for a baby; could he, Reese, and Katrina raise this child together?
"Somewhere, somehow, Amy did the impossible. She got herself a baby."
I love that this diverse book was my 300th read for Netgalley. I love love love that there is a story about trans women being celebrated and heralded on "must read" lists. I enjoyed so much about this book. Reese and Amy are detailed and realistic characters who--to me at least--did not seem stereotypical or one-dimensional. I felt like I learned so much reading their raw, emotional, and lovely story.
The tale of Ames becoming a parent--and wanting to involve Reese--was an interesting and dynamic one for me. I could completely understand Reese's longing for motherhood and how she felt on the outside looking in. This part of the book was original and fascinating. Pieces of the story were utterly hilarious, despite some of the serious subject matter. There is a chapter where Reese attends an essential oils party with Katrina and other straight/cis women that made me laugh out loud. Peters captures her voice so perfectly. There's a vulnerability and realness to Reese that makes her a captivating character from the start.
"Reese had already diagnosed her own problem. She didn't know how to be alone. She fled from her own company, from her own solitude."
The hardest part for me about this book had nothing to do with its subject matter (if that's a problem for you, you're the problem), but the fact that it veers between the past and the present, going on tangents about Reese and Amy's past. Sometimes it seemed like it just needed a strong edit, with someone willing to strike about half of those passages. Or perhaps I just wanted to get on with the present, the impending baby, and Reese, Katrina, and Ames' story. I'm not sure. But I was nearly compelled to skim some of these long passages. It was just a lot. And then, after all that, the book just sort of ended, to me, without much resolution, and I felt a bit betrayed.
Still, do not get me wrong. This is an excellent and important story, and more such stories like this need to be told. I definitely recommend it, and I bet any forthcoming books from Peters will only get better and better. 3.5
Debbiereadsbook (1659 KP) rated Blood King (Heart Stones #1) in Books
May 4, 2022
Left with so many questions but so bloody good!!
Independent reviewer for Archaeolibrarain, I was gifted my copy of this book.
I'm not gonna write a bit about this book. I'm not gonna rehash any sort of plot line, but what I am gonna say is this:
ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH!
Sayle has a particular way of messing with my head, she leaves me with question after question. Mostly, questions I cannot voice, but my head knows it has questions and Sayle drives me freaking nuts about it!
So, once I got over my spit-your-dummy-out, throw-your-toys-out-the-pram and I'll-scream-and-scream-and-scream-until-I'm-sick kind of tantrum, here's what I thought about this book.
So good, this first book in a new series, a very different book than of late for Sayle and I read this and flung my kindle at the wall and my partner looked at me like I grew a third head!
Why, you ask? Because questions, people, I have a lot, A LOT of freaking questions about this book and it's taken me 3 days to manage to write something about this book that actually makes sense!
I am, however, fairly certain that I will not be the only one why has questions, hell, I'm not even sure if Sayle has all the questions, let alone the answers to everything that was NOT said here.
Because while you get everything you need about Aion and Shiesha NOW, there is much, so (I really wanna use the Fword here but some sites don't like that, but I need to stress the point!) freaking MUCH, that is not said. About who Aion and Shiesha are running from, about what happened to Aion's family, about who Shiesha really is, about WHAT he is! And those bloody monks? Cryptic or what! But those monks, I understood. They are bound by a higher power and sworn to secrecy. Aion and Shiesha have all the answers, they just need to listen to their hearts to find them.
And then we get to the ending! A cliff hanger, people, of massive proportions! I knew this was coming, the blurb says so, but still. I had 10 minutes left in the book and then it was finished and sheesh, I was not happy! There is a teeny tiny bit that happens next, a bit of an epilogue slash sneak peak but I would rather have not had that, to be honest! I think it would have had a bigger reaction from people to not have that sneak peak, and I am left a little . . .annoyed . . .maybe. . . by it! I don't know WHY, but book feelings, people, I'm sharing my book feelings!
Anyway!
Because I have questions;
because I read it in one sitting;
because I threw my kindle at the wall (and it's been a long ass time since I did that!)
because of that freaking cliff hanger;
because, even, of that sneak peek;
because it's my review and I can. . .
5 freaking amazing stars!
But write quicker, Ms Sayle.
Write.
Quicker.
*same worded review will appear elsewhere
I'm not gonna write a bit about this book. I'm not gonna rehash any sort of plot line, but what I am gonna say is this:
ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHH!
Sayle has a particular way of messing with my head, she leaves me with question after question. Mostly, questions I cannot voice, but my head knows it has questions and Sayle drives me freaking nuts about it!
So, once I got over my spit-your-dummy-out, throw-your-toys-out-the-pram and I'll-scream-and-scream-and-scream-until-I'm-sick kind of tantrum, here's what I thought about this book.
So good, this first book in a new series, a very different book than of late for Sayle and I read this and flung my kindle at the wall and my partner looked at me like I grew a third head!
Why, you ask? Because questions, people, I have a lot, A LOT of freaking questions about this book and it's taken me 3 days to manage to write something about this book that actually makes sense!
I am, however, fairly certain that I will not be the only one why has questions, hell, I'm not even sure if Sayle has all the questions, let alone the answers to everything that was NOT said here.
Because while you get everything you need about Aion and Shiesha NOW, there is much, so (I really wanna use the Fword here but some sites don't like that, but I need to stress the point!) freaking MUCH, that is not said. About who Aion and Shiesha are running from, about what happened to Aion's family, about who Shiesha really is, about WHAT he is! And those bloody monks? Cryptic or what! But those monks, I understood. They are bound by a higher power and sworn to secrecy. Aion and Shiesha have all the answers, they just need to listen to their hearts to find them.
And then we get to the ending! A cliff hanger, people, of massive proportions! I knew this was coming, the blurb says so, but still. I had 10 minutes left in the book and then it was finished and sheesh, I was not happy! There is a teeny tiny bit that happens next, a bit of an epilogue slash sneak peak but I would rather have not had that, to be honest! I think it would have had a bigger reaction from people to not have that sneak peak, and I am left a little . . .annoyed . . .maybe. . . by it! I don't know WHY, but book feelings, people, I'm sharing my book feelings!
Anyway!
Because I have questions;
because I read it in one sitting;
because I threw my kindle at the wall (and it's been a long ass time since I did that!)
because of that freaking cliff hanger;
because, even, of that sneak peek;
because it's my review and I can. . .
5 freaking amazing stars!
But write quicker, Ms Sayle.
Write.
Quicker.
*same worded review will appear elsewhere
Kyera (8 KP) rated Tales from the Shadowhunter Academy in Books
Jan 31, 2018
Tales from the Shadowhunter Academy is a collection of short stories or novellas that delve deeper into the Shadow World. It follows Simon’s time at Shadowhunter Academy but is rife with additional fascinating information. Overall, it is a highly entertaining installment in the Shadowhunter Chronicles and I would definitely recommend that you read it prior to the Dark Artifices series. Please do not read this review if you have not yet read the Infernal Devices or the Mortal Instruments series as there will be plot points mentioned.
The first novella is Welcome to Shadowhunter Academy, where Simon decides that he wants to become a Shadowhunter. After losing his memories, Simon must decide who he wants to be – a mundane that does not remember the Shadow World or a future Shadowhunter that may regain some of his memories. He meets a collection of students, both Shadowhunter and mundane that will be with him for the next two years as they train to become proper Shadowhunters. Although we know these characters for less time than those we’ve grown to love in the other series, they are still likable and well-developed. Over the course of the two years that the novellas take place, each character learns what it means to be a Shadowhunter, to be loyal to their friends, and to not always take the Law at face value (thanks to Simon’s incessant dialogues that Downworlders are not lesser people.) Of course, we’ve loved Simon since we met him in the Mortal Instruments but this was a great series of stories that allowed us to get to know him better (even though he was missing his memories).
The second is The Lost Herondale, in which we learn more about the beliefs of the Shadowhunters. Deserting your fellow Shadowhunters is considered the worst thing that you can do – so the punishment is severe. This novella tells us the story of Tobias Herondale and shows Simon that not every story is as black and white as it may be presented. We also learn that Catarina Loss, Magnus’ friend and current teacher at Shadowhunter Academy, saved Tobias’ child – which means that there may be a lost Herondale in the world. This plot line is mentioned first in the Mortal Instruments and pursued more in the Dark Artifices, so that is one reason why I believe this series of novellas should be read prior to beginning Lady Midnight.
The third is the Whitechapel Fiend, in which Tessa comes to Shadowhunter Academy to teach a lesson. It was lovely to see more of our favourite characters from the Infernal Devices, especially because this was a later period in time than the books so we got a glimpse into their future lives. The fourth is Nothing but Shadows, which chronicles James Herondale’s time at the Academy. It made me miss the Infernal Devices and impatient for the next series that Cassandra Clare will be writing featuring the children we got glimpses of.
The fifth is The Evil We Love and a tale from the time of Valentine’s Circle. The Circle’s history is considered a dark time and infrequently talked about in the series. Most Shadowhunters who were involved are either ashamed of their actions and largely refuse to talk about it, or dead. It’s always fascinating to see what the power and influence of a charismatic leader can get people to do. Simon learns that he knows better than to just go along with the crowd and speaks out against ideas that he doesn’t agree with. It makes him even more likable as a character because I’m sure we all have experienced times when we disagreed with someone we cared about and how difficult it might be not to just follow their lead.
The sixth is Pale Kings and Princes, which creates some foundation for the world we will experience in the Dark Artifices. We learn how Mark and Helen Blackthorn came to be, with their half-faerie lineage. It is a heart-wrenching tale and makes you question the harshness of the Cold Peace. Helen is no longer trusted, and essentially banished, because of her heritage and that action fractures her entire family – as the Blackthorn parents were murdered during the War. Helen was willing to take care of her family, but she was torn away and those kinds of wounds will certainly affect the characters of the Dark Artifices in the future.
The seventh is Bitter of Tongue essentially just reiterates the point that Downworlders are not lesser beings than mundanes or Shadowhunters. We get to see more of the Blackthorn clan, the utterly repulsive treatment of the half-fae children Mark and Helen, and a lovely wedding.
The eighth is The Fiery Trial, in which Simon and Clary are asked to serve at witnesses for Julian and Emma’s parabatai ceremony. The story focuses more on the relationship between Simon and Clary than Julian and Emma but it was nice to see the ceremony. Jace and Alec became parabati prior to the Mortal Instruments, so until now, we had not seen the ceremony performed. It also made Simon and Clary evaluation their own friendship and the depth of their connection.
The ninth is Born to Endless Night and revolves around the beloved Malec, as well as Magnus Banes short tenure at Shadowhunter Academy. The character development shown in this novella was a culmination of Alec’s experiences throughout the Mortal Instruments and how he grew as a person. While not confident and cocky like Jace, he had become secure in his own skin and learned to love (romantically). It was the most normal of the novellas, showing a behind-the-scenes type look into the lives of our favourite Mortal Instruments characters.
The final novella in the collection is Angels Twice Descending in which Simon and the other mundanes of the Academy have their Ascension. Simon must decide whether he is ready to face the risks, to give up his mundane life and embrace the dangers and responsibility of being a Shadowhunter. It was a beautiful wrap up to the series, allowing Simon the time to explore the life he was leaving behind and the family that he was gaining. As I mentioned before, I would highly recommend reading this series of novellas as it only enhances the Shadowhunter experience (and deepens the world).
The first novella is Welcome to Shadowhunter Academy, where Simon decides that he wants to become a Shadowhunter. After losing his memories, Simon must decide who he wants to be – a mundane that does not remember the Shadow World or a future Shadowhunter that may regain some of his memories. He meets a collection of students, both Shadowhunter and mundane that will be with him for the next two years as they train to become proper Shadowhunters. Although we know these characters for less time than those we’ve grown to love in the other series, they are still likable and well-developed. Over the course of the two years that the novellas take place, each character learns what it means to be a Shadowhunter, to be loyal to their friends, and to not always take the Law at face value (thanks to Simon’s incessant dialogues that Downworlders are not lesser people.) Of course, we’ve loved Simon since we met him in the Mortal Instruments but this was a great series of stories that allowed us to get to know him better (even though he was missing his memories).
The second is The Lost Herondale, in which we learn more about the beliefs of the Shadowhunters. Deserting your fellow Shadowhunters is considered the worst thing that you can do – so the punishment is severe. This novella tells us the story of Tobias Herondale and shows Simon that not every story is as black and white as it may be presented. We also learn that Catarina Loss, Magnus’ friend and current teacher at Shadowhunter Academy, saved Tobias’ child – which means that there may be a lost Herondale in the world. This plot line is mentioned first in the Mortal Instruments and pursued more in the Dark Artifices, so that is one reason why I believe this series of novellas should be read prior to beginning Lady Midnight.
The third is the Whitechapel Fiend, in which Tessa comes to Shadowhunter Academy to teach a lesson. It was lovely to see more of our favourite characters from the Infernal Devices, especially because this was a later period in time than the books so we got a glimpse into their future lives. The fourth is Nothing but Shadows, which chronicles James Herondale’s time at the Academy. It made me miss the Infernal Devices and impatient for the next series that Cassandra Clare will be writing featuring the children we got glimpses of.
The fifth is The Evil We Love and a tale from the time of Valentine’s Circle. The Circle’s history is considered a dark time and infrequently talked about in the series. Most Shadowhunters who were involved are either ashamed of their actions and largely refuse to talk about it, or dead. It’s always fascinating to see what the power and influence of a charismatic leader can get people to do. Simon learns that he knows better than to just go along with the crowd and speaks out against ideas that he doesn’t agree with. It makes him even more likable as a character because I’m sure we all have experienced times when we disagreed with someone we cared about and how difficult it might be not to just follow their lead.
The sixth is Pale Kings and Princes, which creates some foundation for the world we will experience in the Dark Artifices. We learn how Mark and Helen Blackthorn came to be, with their half-faerie lineage. It is a heart-wrenching tale and makes you question the harshness of the Cold Peace. Helen is no longer trusted, and essentially banished, because of her heritage and that action fractures her entire family – as the Blackthorn parents were murdered during the War. Helen was willing to take care of her family, but she was torn away and those kinds of wounds will certainly affect the characters of the Dark Artifices in the future.
The seventh is Bitter of Tongue essentially just reiterates the point that Downworlders are not lesser beings than mundanes or Shadowhunters. We get to see more of the Blackthorn clan, the utterly repulsive treatment of the half-fae children Mark and Helen, and a lovely wedding.
The eighth is The Fiery Trial, in which Simon and Clary are asked to serve at witnesses for Julian and Emma’s parabatai ceremony. The story focuses more on the relationship between Simon and Clary than Julian and Emma but it was nice to see the ceremony. Jace and Alec became parabati prior to the Mortal Instruments, so until now, we had not seen the ceremony performed. It also made Simon and Clary evaluation their own friendship and the depth of their connection.
The ninth is Born to Endless Night and revolves around the beloved Malec, as well as Magnus Banes short tenure at Shadowhunter Academy. The character development shown in this novella was a culmination of Alec’s experiences throughout the Mortal Instruments and how he grew as a person. While not confident and cocky like Jace, he had become secure in his own skin and learned to love (romantically). It was the most normal of the novellas, showing a behind-the-scenes type look into the lives of our favourite Mortal Instruments characters.
The final novella in the collection is Angels Twice Descending in which Simon and the other mundanes of the Academy have their Ascension. Simon must decide whether he is ready to face the risks, to give up his mundane life and embrace the dangers and responsibility of being a Shadowhunter. It was a beautiful wrap up to the series, allowing Simon the time to explore the life he was leaving behind and the family that he was gaining. As I mentioned before, I would highly recommend reading this series of novellas as it only enhances the Shadowhunter experience (and deepens the world).
Phillip McSween (751 KP) rated Bad Boys II (2003) in Movies
Apr 2, 2020
Decent but Definitely the Worst of the Trilogy
Narcotics detectives Mike Lowrey (Will Smith) and Marcus Burnett (Martin Lawrence) are back getting into a heap of shit as they try and take down an ecstasy ring.
Acting: 9
You have to love the performances of Lawrence and Smith as they know how to carry a movie between the two of them. Their chemistry is amazing and they do a wonderful job of balancing each other out, particularly in this film were Smith is more of a shoot-first type while Lawrence’s role is about finding peace and zen. Joe Pantoliano makes a return as Captain Howard, making me crack up everytime he opens his mouth to yell at Lowrey and Burnett for screwing up yet again.
The one role I just couldn’t let sneak past was Jordi Molla playing Johnny Tapia. Terrible doesn’t even begin to describe his performance. It feels too cliche and way overdone, detracting from important scenes at times. Wasn’t a fan in the slightest.
Beginning: 7
While I did appreciate the action at the beginning of the movie, there was just too much going on for me to really settle in and get into it. It’s hard to really understand up from down in the first ten minutes which carries on as the movie progresses as well. Less can be more sometimes, but it feels like in this instance, director Michael Bay called for more of everything.
Characters: 9
Cinematography/Visuals: 6
Bad Boys II has its moments cinematically. The mortuary scene and the scene in the abandoned house are two that really stand out for me. They were shot in such a way that they are hard to forget. From an overall standpoint, I am not a fan of the overdose of slowmo that Bay loves to do. It becomes tedious to the brain and drags the movie out longer than it needs to be. And this movie already has enough time constraints as it is.
Conflict: 10
Action abounds in this second installment from shootouts to car chases to explosions on top of explosions. If you are an action junky, this movie will not disappoint. As much as I rag on Bay (and, no he’s not my favorite director), he knows how to make a scene pop and make traditional action sets feel extremely original. Even as I’m typing this, I can’t forget the highway scene where the bad guys have hijacked a car-carrying truck and they start to release the cars as they speed down the highway. It’s absolute calamity.
Entertainment Value: 7
Memorability: 8
Pace: 7
Bay does his best to keep things fresh, but it’s hard to hide from the fact that this is all about action then dialogue then right back to action. It gets a bit repetitive at times, but I will also admit that it may have something to do with the fact that I’ve watched a shit ton of movies recently (what else is new?). When Cuba gets mentioned and you realize the movie is only two thirds of the way over when it should be finished, that’s when things really slowed down for me even more. You can absolutely cut thirty minutes from this movie and it would be phenomenal, possibly a classic.
Plot: 6
Decent enough story, but nothing that’s going to win an Oscar. I felt corners were cut in spots as there were times where I was trying to figure out, “Why the hell is this happening now?” I also didn’t appreciate some of the cheats, which is a term I use to refer to spots in the movie that conveniently happen for the sake of it being a good scene. Again, cut a half hour of this movie and I might be feeling differently overall.
Resolution: 4
The end was not only mad corny, but it didn’t feel like a real resolution. Not sure what they were going for here, but it didn’t work. The end didn’t really justify the length of what it took to get there.
Overall: 73
I know I know. You read through this review and it almost sounds like I hated Bad Boys II. Truth is, it wasn’t terrible. Would it be the first action movie I recommend? Absolutely not. On the flipside, I can definitely think of many that were worse. At the risk of losing all credibility (as if I had any to begin with), I actually enjoyed this movie more than I did The French Connection. Fight me.
Acting: 9
You have to love the performances of Lawrence and Smith as they know how to carry a movie between the two of them. Their chemistry is amazing and they do a wonderful job of balancing each other out, particularly in this film were Smith is more of a shoot-first type while Lawrence’s role is about finding peace and zen. Joe Pantoliano makes a return as Captain Howard, making me crack up everytime he opens his mouth to yell at Lowrey and Burnett for screwing up yet again.
The one role I just couldn’t let sneak past was Jordi Molla playing Johnny Tapia. Terrible doesn’t even begin to describe his performance. It feels too cliche and way overdone, detracting from important scenes at times. Wasn’t a fan in the slightest.
Beginning: 7
While I did appreciate the action at the beginning of the movie, there was just too much going on for me to really settle in and get into it. It’s hard to really understand up from down in the first ten minutes which carries on as the movie progresses as well. Less can be more sometimes, but it feels like in this instance, director Michael Bay called for more of everything.
Characters: 9
Cinematography/Visuals: 6
Bad Boys II has its moments cinematically. The mortuary scene and the scene in the abandoned house are two that really stand out for me. They were shot in such a way that they are hard to forget. From an overall standpoint, I am not a fan of the overdose of slowmo that Bay loves to do. It becomes tedious to the brain and drags the movie out longer than it needs to be. And this movie already has enough time constraints as it is.
Conflict: 10
Action abounds in this second installment from shootouts to car chases to explosions on top of explosions. If you are an action junky, this movie will not disappoint. As much as I rag on Bay (and, no he’s not my favorite director), he knows how to make a scene pop and make traditional action sets feel extremely original. Even as I’m typing this, I can’t forget the highway scene where the bad guys have hijacked a car-carrying truck and they start to release the cars as they speed down the highway. It’s absolute calamity.
Entertainment Value: 7
Memorability: 8
Pace: 7
Bay does his best to keep things fresh, but it’s hard to hide from the fact that this is all about action then dialogue then right back to action. It gets a bit repetitive at times, but I will also admit that it may have something to do with the fact that I’ve watched a shit ton of movies recently (what else is new?). When Cuba gets mentioned and you realize the movie is only two thirds of the way over when it should be finished, that’s when things really slowed down for me even more. You can absolutely cut thirty minutes from this movie and it would be phenomenal, possibly a classic.
Plot: 6
Decent enough story, but nothing that’s going to win an Oscar. I felt corners were cut in spots as there were times where I was trying to figure out, “Why the hell is this happening now?” I also didn’t appreciate some of the cheats, which is a term I use to refer to spots in the movie that conveniently happen for the sake of it being a good scene. Again, cut a half hour of this movie and I might be feeling differently overall.
Resolution: 4
The end was not only mad corny, but it didn’t feel like a real resolution. Not sure what they were going for here, but it didn’t work. The end didn’t really justify the length of what it took to get there.
Overall: 73
I know I know. You read through this review and it almost sounds like I hated Bad Boys II. Truth is, it wasn’t terrible. Would it be the first action movie I recommend? Absolutely not. On the flipside, I can definitely think of many that were worse. At the risk of losing all credibility (as if I had any to begin with), I actually enjoyed this movie more than I did The French Connection. Fight me.