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TP
The Problem with Forever
8
7.8 (5 Ratings)
Book Rating
I have really wanted to read something by Jennifer L Armentrout for a while, one being the lux series that I have heard a lot of people in the blogosphere rave about. I wasn’t expecting to like this book as much as I did! Your probably think I say that for all the books I read, but I try not to set expectations too high. This book was addictive, I managed to read 70% of it in one day and stayed up until the early hours of the morning just so I could finish it, even though I knew I was going to be sooo tired for work the next day.

Mallory Dodge hasn’t had the easiest start in life, she grew up in Foster homes and some that were pretty awful, so much that she becomes withdrawn and the only way to keep herself safe and from drawing attention to herself is to remain as quiet as a ‘Mouse’. Until one horrific incident she manages to escape the horrific abuse that she was subjected to and adopted by Carl and Rosa two doctors that treated her but she will forever be scarred mentally and physically. Mallory is returning to a state school after being home schooled for the previous 4 years and somewhat apprehensive. Being silent has held Mallory back and she needs to start getting on with her life and one is to start socializing with people her own age and building her confidence, otherwise she fears she will be this way forever.

All is going well on her first day, well she hasn’t spoken to anyone but at least she is at school which is a big tick in the box. One of her classes is speech, one of the hardest lessons for her to overcome. She spots a boy who feels familiar to her, but it couldn’t be, could it? When the boy seats himself next to her in speech she is shocked, the boy is Rider Stark…. her best friend from when she was in the foster home, her saviour and protector, one that experienced all those awful things with her, he knows her like no-one else. With emotions and feelings about Rider all over the place, her foster parents not happy with his sudden appearance and what it will mean, Mallory has to break the silence to save everything.

OK! I need to start off with the cover, how beautiful is this book and the colours? This would instantly draw me in and buy it, you can just tell its contemporary. This book a massive 480 pages and there wasn’t a dull moment. This is such an emotional story, there is swoon worthy romance with a hot guy, there are sad times and times when my heart was racing because I was scared for Mallory and Rider, what would happen to them both.

Mallory’s character was amazing with so much development, she was such a different girl at the finish and I was overcome with pride as of how well she had managed and grew. She is a likeable character always trying to please everyone, she is shy and timid making you really feel for her.

Rider, he is Mallory’s protector and he always will be. It’s what he knows best. He skips class to make sure Mallory is not alone at lunch, he doesn’t do much when he does attend his lessons but he is an artist (not to him). He is so caring and like perfect boyfriend material it was impossible not to swoon.

Some could say the romance was a bit insta-lovey but for me it wasn’t. They hadn’t seen each other in 4 years and they were reconnecting wanting to get to know each other again and find out how life has been since they last saw each other. But their friendship was totally different from 4 years ago, and they both knew it. There was an attraction that wasn’t there before.

Throughout the story Mallory has flashbacks to when she was younger and the abuse(physically and verbally) that herself and Rider were subjected to and what lead to the incident. It shows how Rider cared for Mallory and how there pasts had shaped the people they had become.

I really liked most of the side characters in this book, there was Ainsley which was Mallory’s best friend outside of school. Hector and Jayden were cheeky chappies who Rider lived with. Paige and Carl I didn’t really warm to but I think that’s mainly because they were getting in the way of Mallory’s happiness .

This story is addictive, beautiful and heart warming, I enjoyed every page and would definitely recommend it.

I rated this 4 out of stars
I received a copy of this from Netgalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
  
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Louise (64 KP) rated Me Before You in Books

Jul 2, 2018  
Me Before You
Me Before You
Jojo Moyes | 2012 | Fiction & Poetry
10
8.3 (59 Ratings)
Book Rating
This book has all the feels and is just all round fantastic, in my eyes this book was faultless!

Lou Clark has recently just lost her job and is in desperate need to find an alternative to be able to pay rent and help support her sister, nephew and grandfather. Lou hasn’t got many skills listed on her CV after working at the ‘Buttered Bun’ so it’s difficult to find a job in the small village with decent pay. When her job seeker advises her a position has just come up for a carer/assistant for a paraplegic, Lou is hesitant, she hasn’t the faintest idea if she could do this job and concerned about having to help people to the toilet. Incredibly Lou manages to get the job, and is introduced to Will Traynor. Will is paralysed from the waist down with limited use of his hands and Lou’s job is to help him eat, drink and to just keep him company. With Will grieving for the life he used to have and Lou being a happy-go-lucky sort of gal, they begin to change each others lives in ways they did not expect.

I will start off with the characters, they were great, equally complex and just all round enjoyable to read about. Lou was just brilliant with her quirky dress code and very British humour. She made me laugh quite a lot during this book especially when she felt awkward and would say stupid things. I loved Will, yeah he was brooding and foreboding but who wouldn’t be if they were put in that situation. Will was very humourous, he was very witty and sarcastic and matched Lou, between them they had some amazing banter that just made me smile throughout this book. The one character who I didn’t particularly like was Patrick, Patrick is Lou’s boyfriend, they have been together for years and it seems they have settled into a somewhat comfortable relationship, maybe too comfortable. Patrick is obsessed with doing a triathlon/marathon, he is constantly training, Lou is always working so they don’t see much each other but what makes him unlikable is his jealousy and that he takes Lou for granted.

This book has one of the best family dynamics I have ever read and I really really loved it. Lou lives with her mum, Dad,Sister, Nephew and Grandad. The interactions between them all were so realistic and relatable and the reasons for them living the way they were is how a lot of families live nowadays. I will keep saying this but everything about the family was so British and I loved it.It made me feel proud to be British….. I dunno why but it just did.

The book is told mainly from Lou’s perspective, however you do get a chapter or two from alternative POV’s such as Camilla (Will’s mother) and I really appreciated it, however I enjoyed Lou so much that I didn’t want the other perspective. If Jojo hadn’t of done this I would probably be writing how much I would have liked an alternative POV. (Sometimes you just can’t win).

Jojo Moyes certainly opened my eyes to how people with spinal cord injuries live and how inadequate they must feel, especially as Will had such a fulfilling job and enjoyed life to the full before his accident.

The book is packed full of emotions, you had the whole awkwardness, the sarcasm and laughs. Banter between the characters and also there were sad moments and I never NEVER! cry at books. But Jojo Moyes broke me and she did the impossible…. she made me cry! It’s all down to her fantastic storytelling, character development and great writing. The book is quite big (pagewise) but due to Moyes writing style it’s a really fun, quick and easy read.

The Movie! Will I be seeing it? I am not sure! I don’t want it to be really crap and let me down. I watched the trailer and I am just not sure about the cast! When I look at Lou I will always be thinking Daenerys and I pictured Will being more attractive…..more like Patrick Dempsey (even though he is probably too old for the role) The other question that needs to be answered is, Will I be reading the sequel ‘After you’? Again I don’t know! I have heard that it’s not as good and also I don’t want anything to spoil my view of this book. Let me know if any of you have read after you and if it’s worth it. I will be looking into Jojo Moyes other books. I would give this book all the stars in the world I absolutely loved it.

I recommend this to anyone.

Overall I rated this 5 out of 5 stars
  
Serenity (2005)
Serenity (2005)
2005 | Action, Sci-Fi
5
8.4 (35 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Years ago, Star Trek found new life after network cancellation, and gained new legions of fans through syndication, films, spin off series, and countless novels.

While networks have often had a love/hate relationship with Science Fiction shows, few can debate that shows such as Battlestar Galactica, Smallville, Buffy, and The X-Files have proven to be profitable investments for the studios that created them.

Sadly for fans and viewers alike, for every hit there are at least three failures such as The Lone Gunmen, Space Rangers, and Earth 2. Then you get the shows such as Enterprise, Crusade and Firefly that get cancelled before their time, leaving legions of fans to ponder what might have been had the shows been allowed to continue their productions.

When FOX cancelled the show Firefly after a handful of episodes, fans were outraged. The show had developed a loyal following, but did not meet what the studio was after, leaving it as just another failed series.

Thanks to strong DVD sales, the shows creator Joss Whedon was given the chance to bring his series to the big screen and after months and months of delays, the film Serenity has finally been released.

I would like to say at the outset that while I was not a fan of the show, I did catch it in reruns and grew to appreciate much of the quality that was in the show. With my new found appreciation of the show and amidst the wave of growing hype around the release, I attended an early screener of the film several weeks back anxious to see what the excitement was all about.

The film revolves around the crew of a Firefly class ship named Serenity whose Captain Mal (Nathan Fillion), is a former soldier who survived the battle of Serenity Valley during a period of galactic unrest. Mal makes a living as rogue trying to stay ahead of the Alliance and various threats such as the deadly cannibalistic Reavers.

The story involves a young girl named River (Summer Glau) and her physician brother Simon (Sean Maher). The two are fleeing the Alliance where River was being honed to be a weapon of amazing abilities.

In the aftermath of a mission where the deadly Reavers arrive, Mal and the crew find themselves fleeing an Alliance assassin, who has brought the overwhelming might of the Alliance to bear in an effort to capture River.

Of course Mal with no love of the Alliance will not allow this even though many in his crew see new harm in saving their necks by turning her over. As the film unfolds it leads to the discovery of why the Alliance is so desperate to keep the knowledge River has obtained a secret and a deadly confrontation between the crew, the Reavers, and the Alliance.

As much as I tried to like this film, I was unable to. The film plods along for almost 90 minutes before getting to any sustained action, and when it finally does arrive, it is so by the book and underwhelming, I felt cheated. Two gigantic fleets converge and I think we are going to get a grand battle. Instead, the film gives us about 90 seconds of action only to take the story to a bland locale in a poorly decorated and conceived set.

After sitting through such a large setup, and enduring a cast that often is about as exciting in this film as watching paint dry, I thought something more should be done. I would have expected this from a show that was on television, but for a film version, it was lacking much of the energy that is needed to maintain a feature films.

I am not saying that the cast are bad actors, far from it, but they spend a lot of the film with a dear in the headlights look that underscores that this is first and foremost a TV. show. As such, the cast and many of the sets and effects seem underpowered in the transition to the screen.

The entire length of the film, I thought I was watching an inexpensive television series rather than a major studio release. As such, I had a hard time caring for the characters.

A few nights ago I watched another episode of the series on the Sci Fi Channel and I was amazed at how interesting the characters were, how engrossing the story was, and how much humor and action it had. While the film attempts to convey this, much of it falls flat. Serenity will make a good film series with a bit more effort, but as it stands now, the film is little more than a TV movie of the week for die hard fans only. This is sad as with a bit more polish it could have, and should have been much, much more.
  
The Dead Girls Club
The Dead Girls Club
8
9.3 (3 Ratings)
Book Rating
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The Dead Girls Club by Damien Angelica Walters left me unprepared for what I was about to read.

A perfect blend of mystery, spookiness, friendship and psychological trauma. This book will keep you away from social events until you are finished. And a few days after…

<i><b>Red Lady, Red Lady, show us your face…</b>

In 1991, Heather Cole and her friends were members of the Dead Girls Club. Obsessed with the macabre, the girls exchanged stories about serial killers and imaginary monsters, like the Red Lady, the spirit of a vengeful witch killed centuries before. Heather knew the stories were just that, until her best friend Becca began insisting the Red Lady was real – and she could prove it.

That belief got Becca killed.

It’s been nearly thirty years, but Heather has never told anyone what really happened that night–that Becca was right and the Red Lady was real. She’s done her best to put that fateful summer, Becca, and the Red Lady, behind her. Until a familiar necklace arrives in the mail, a necklace Heather hasn’t seen since the night Becca died.

The night Heather killed her.

Now, someone else knows what she did…and they’re determined to make Heather pay.</i>

From the beginning of the book, you can feel the intensity, the guilt and the mystery behind it, which was something I very much enjoy in my books. We get to see the life of Heather 30 years after the death of Becca, and we know from the very first chapter that Heather killed her.

But they were best friends. And Heather loves Becca, even now, with every atom of her body. They were those BFFs that were always together, and knew each other’s secrets. They both loved mystery and talking about serial killers. And then things somehow start to go wrong. They are slipping from the friendship slide, and they can’t do anything to stop it…

<i><b>The heart, the other half of which once hung around my neck, even after, is a cheap thing of nickel, stainless steel, or some inexpensive alloy. Originally affixed to a cardboard square and purchased by two girls who saved their allowance. Best Friends Forever. We meant it, she and I. We meant it with every bone in our bodies and every true and good thing in our souls. We didn’t know forever didn’t always last that long.</b></i>

This is one of the few stories where I rooted for a killer. I know how horrible it sounds, but I loved that perspective. The innocence behind a terrible act. The belief that what you did might have been wrong, but you still did it for the right reasons. The ultimate friendship and the boundaries.
I loved Heather, and I also loved Becca. I hated all the things that were standing between them, driving them further away from each other.

This is a book about a murder, and about a scary story becoming real. But this book is also about friendship, about psychological trauma, and about the force a person needs to get trough it. The crucial support this person requires to get through the rainy days. Heather was struggling, and there was no one beside her to help her. Everyone she knew and trusted suddenly abandoned her, and this tells a sad and realistic story about the reality people with mental health issues are facing. No one wants a damaged person in their lives, I get that. But when this person is your friend for life, when this person is your life companion, you know. You know how they were before it, and you should always be there to support them, and get them to become their healthy selves again. We all need a person in life that will push our boundaries and be there for us when we are not able to be there for ourselves.

The Dead Girls Club covers so many topics that warm and crush my heart. And I love it for it. If your book taste is similar to mine, I am sure you will love this book too, and I recommend it!

Huge thanks to Melissa and the team at Crooked Lane Books in the US, for sending me a paperback ARC copy in exchange for my honest review!

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)
2014 | Action, Sci-Fi
2
6.0 (20 Ratings)
Movie Rating
I’m kind of like everyone else out there. I grew up with the Ninja Turtles. I loved the cartoons, the comics and most of all the toys. I remember the pizza shooter. Boy, did I get into some trouble with that. When the movie came out in 1990, I begged and begged by father to take me to it until he finally did. I loved that movie! And while it may not for most, it still hold up for me today.

I wish that I could speak with as much enthusiasm about 2014’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The truth is, as I sat there and watched I found myself shaking my head “no” more often than not over the course of the hour and a half. My worst fears for the movie came true, and I am ashamed of what this may do to the franchise. And be warned, there are most definitely spoilers ahead.

TMNT is about a “gang” called the Foot Clan, who are robbing chemical shipments, banks and all sorts of places in New York City. April O’Neil, a local news reporter, is looking to make a big break and thinks she may have found it as she happens upon a robbery in progress by the Foot Clan. But before she could any good pictures or footage, mysterious vigilantes show up and save the day. This leads her to investigate and find out that none other than our favorite heroes in the half shell are said vigilantes. We find out that the partner of Shredder, the head of the Foot Clan, was running experiments using a chemical compound not of this world. They were injecting, you guessed it, four turtles and a rat. Now the turtles must stop the Foot Clan from carrying out there ultimate plan, which leads us to a final showdown between our heroes and Shredder.

First off, bad move changing the origin story like that. A mutagen made from an alien compound? It totally lacks credibility especially as it is only slight referenced in one scene, and then never spoken of again. Plus, losing “the ooze” origin totally closes doors (though maybe not all the way) on other characters in the TMNT universe (i.e. BeBop and Rocksteady). It’s just really lame to see them veer away from what was tried and true.

The turtles themselves, their new look actually grew on me. I think that some of the accessories may have been a little overboard, but the basics were there. I especially liked that the bandanas weren’t identical. However, the look is where it ended for me. I do not think that they cast the voices right. It just didn’t sound like they are supposed to sound. We’ve had the iconic voices from animated series to the old series of movies that just stand out. I didn’t get that here.

Also, I just don’t get the deal with Megan Fox. I get that some guys find her attractive, but that doesn’t mean she can act. She was the absolute worst choice for April O’Neil. She just didn’t look the part. Maybe Michael Bay was trying to prove a point about the rumors going around for why she wasn’t in Transformers 3. Will Arnett, however, did an excellent job as Vern Fenwick, O’Neil’s camera man. He had some great comedic timing and relief from the action sequences.

If you ask me, they showed Shredder’s face way too early in the movie. And then they way overdid him, right off the get go. Shredder was a formidable foe because of his cunningness and martial arts expertise. But ladies and gentleman, they introduce Super Shredder almost immediately off the bat. Or, as I like to call him in this film, Swiss Army Shredder. He looked like a freaking Transformer, in the worst way. I swear I even heard the Transformer sound when he jumped and landed one time. They way, way over did it. I know, I’ve already said this. But it seems to be a theme of the night.

I walked out of the film wishing I had never agreed to do this. Unfortunately, though, someone’s got to take one for the team. And if it means that I can warn others, than I am glad to have done it. The movie was entirely bad; there were a couple of funny moments. It just saddens me to think that this will be some people’s first exposure to what was always such an awesome universe. I will most definitely not be picking this up on Blu-ray. I will, however, be watching 1990’ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Now, I understand that some of you may see me as being a fan boy obsessing over nostalgia. But if you have read any of my reviews, you know that I always am kinder and look for the entertainment value of movies. This movie just made me sad. But if you don’t believe me, or doubt my opinion… go check it out. You’ll wish you hadn’t.
  
The Best Horror of the Year Volume 1
The Best Horror of the Year Volume 1
Ellen Datlow | 2009 | Crime, Horror, Mystery, Thriller
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
56 of 250
Book
The Best Horror of the Year Volume 1
Edited by Ellen Datlow

Once read a review will be written via Smashbomb and link posted in comments!

I will post in comments a short comment on each story!

An Air Force Loadmaster is menaced by strange sounds within his cargo; a man is asked to track down a childhood friend... who died years earlier; doomed pioneers forge a path westward as a young mother discovers her true nature; an alcoholic strikes a dangerous bargain with a gregarious stranger; urban explorers delve into a ruined book depository, finding more than they anticipated; residents of a rural Wisconsin town defend against a legendary monster; a woman wracked by survivor's guilt is haunted by the ghosts of a tragic crash; a detective strives to solve the mystery of a dismembered girl; an orphan returns to a wicked witch's candy house; a group of smugglers find themselves buried to the necks in sand; an unanticipated guest brings doom to a high-class party; a teacher attempts to lead his students to safety as the world comes to an end around them...

What frightens us, what unnerves us? What causes that delicious shiver of fear to travel the lengths of our spines? It seems the answer changes every year. Every year the bar is raised; the screw is tightened. Ellen Datlow knows what scares us; the twenty-one stories and poems included in this anthology were chosen from magazines, webzines, anthologies, literary journals, and single author collections to represent the best horror of the year.

Legendary editor Ellen Datlow (Poe: New Tales Inspired by Edgar Allan Poe), winner of multiple Hugo, Bram Stoker, and World Fantasy awards, joins Night Shade Books in presenting The Best Horror of the Year, Volume One.

1. Cargo by E.Michael Lewis
So chilling and so sad! This is short I dedication to the families of those children in Jonestown and the men and women who brought the bodies home.

2. If Angels Fight by Richard Bowes
This is about a man searching for his friend who was possessed by an Angel. On this journey you see and find out that this Angel left his friend and left a trail behind him to follow. His family never gave up he managed to find his friend and Angel Michael and return him to his home one last time. Only question was did he bring him home to find his sister to posses or to say goodbye to his mother?.

3. The Clay Party by Steve Duffy
A group of settlers embark on a journey for a new life in California in 1846, the journey does not go as expected. I was a bit bored at the beginning but certainly had a twist at the end.

4. Penguins of the Apocalypse by William Browning Spencer
This is brilliant! A man fighting his personal battles with alcohol! Now is the pulka and penguin freedom movement real or a fragment of his imagination while under the influence? Either way it was entertaining!

5. Esmeralda by Glen Hirshberg
This is a very strange little story involving the end of all books,pens and paper! Very odd!

6. The Hodog by Trent Hergenrader
A good old fashioned urban legend!

7. Very Low Flying Aircraft by Nicholas Royle
Not one for me didnt really grip me.

8. When the Gentlemen Go By. By Margaret Ronald
This was a bit chilling and I would love to have read more about these “Gentlemen” who come at night to make bargains!

9. The Lagerstatte by Laird Barron
Grief does strange things to our minds and body! This was quite chilling.

10. Harry and the Monkey by Euan Harvey

This really plays on every fear a parent has when their kids go missing especially in a place and time where children are vanishing!

11 Dress Circle by Miranda Siemeinowicz

12. The Rising River. By Daniel Kaysen
This was strange and after reading it I’m still not sure what’s happening 😂😂

13 Loup-Garou by R.B. Russell
I enjoyed this strange litte story set in my hometown of Birmingham. A little french film causes a little drama in this mans life.

14. Girl in pieces by Graham Edwards
This was my favourite! So far fetched into a world of monsters a detective helps a Golum save a girl cut to pieces! So much fun

15 It washed up by Joe R. Lonsdale
Wow how to pack a punch in 2 pages! Loved it!

16 The Man from the Peak by Adam Golaski
Brilliant short full of mystery blood and gore! Very well written.

17. The Narrows by Simon Bestwick
This actually chilled me I’d hate sending my child to school and have something like this happen which of course is totally possible.

I loved this book of small tales and discovering those writers I wouldn’t normally be exposed too!
  
It may not be completely fair, but most of my ratings include how I feel about the grammar - if there are several punctuation errors, mispelled words, and other mistakes. Because of the grammatical errors in the majority of the Consequences series, these books did not receive the star rating I would have preferred to give them. Consequences and Truth both received 3 stars, but can become a 3.5 rating with corrections. Convicted I gave 3.5 stars, but could easily be 4 stars after editing. Revealed earned 4 stars from me - the grammar, punctuation and spelling were much, much better, therefore this was the highest rating I will give it. Beyond the Consequences was only given 3 stars.
Below I have included my separate reviews for each book.

Truth: I'll be perfectly honest. I've become so familiar with reading from the first person perspective, it's a little difficult to fully immerse myself in a story written in third person; partly because the point of views change so quickly, sometimes without warning, and there are so many, it's hard to keep up with. In Truth, we read (in third person) through Claire's, Tony's, Harry's, Phil's, Sophia's, Derek's, Nathaniel's, Marie's, and Catherine's point of view. In fact, there may even be one or two I'm forgetting. The point is, it was kind of hard to concentrate, especially when the POV changed without any real consistency. However, despite this and some easy to overlook, but not completely dismissed, grammatical errors, I truly enjoyed Truth. I read Consequences over a year ago and have been desperate to find out how the story continues. The first book left me appalled, disgusted, and just as determined to seek revenge as Claire. However, this book left me completely shocked. There were so many twists and turns, so many events that I was in no way prepared for - I loved it. Aleatha kept me on my toes and I couldn't have predicted anything that happened. Of course, my one real worry is that Claire took Tony back. I told myself that, if one were to pretend the events in Consequences didn't occur, Tony's attempts to rekindle his marriage with Claire would be sweet. However, I can't just forget those things happened. Tony hit her, he isolated her, he kidnapped her and controlled every aspect of her life, he manipulated her and abused her more ways than physically. He raped her. In candor, the first of his several sins could probably be overlooked if he were completely and totally dedicated to not only making it up to Claire, but to making sure those moments never occurred again. However, I absolutely cannot get over the fact that he raped her, repeatedly. Something like that can't, and shouldn't, be forgiven. In the first book, I assumed he had successfully brainwashed her into believe she loved him, so I could forgive her for forgiving him. But in Truth, she was able to step away and realize just how much power she could wield over him, yet she fell right back into his arms. I look forward to reading from Tony's point of view to see whether or not I can be persuaded to agree with Claire and her love for him. Until then, I will continue to have my reservations.

Convicted: Man, what a roller coaster! Romig kept me guessing throughout the whole book and, honestly, worried about how everything would turn out. I had my fears from the beginning - with each new chapter, they grew and grew. I actually caught myself hoping Claire would get the happily ever after she so desperately wanted, even if that included Tony. In reality, I still find it hard to chew that the fact Tony raped her could actually be overlooked. However, there is this magical sense of self-preservation called "suspension of belief", which allows us readers to, well, suspend our beliefs to morally accept something from a book that we most certainly wouldn't in real life. I even found myself cheering the couple on, completely forgetting about the past, only to be reminded and question myself. Whether it's absurd for me to have eventually made peace with Claire's decision to love and forgive Tony for his trangressions, that's what happened. Despite the typical grammatical and punctuation errors dotted throughout the book, I rated Convicted with 3.5 stars instead of 3, because I was truly enthralled from beginning to end. It was a worthy read and, as usual, I'm a little sad to be officially parted with Claire and Tony (if you don't include Tony's POV books), but I'm happy with the way their story ended.

Beyond the Consequences: The grammar matched that of Revealed - much improved from the first 3 Consequences books - but I felt incredibly bored throughout most of it. I felt like it was being dragged out; if Aleatha had made it so Patricia and Rudolf were working together, I believe it would have made this story shorter and, therefore, more enjoyable.
  
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Kirk Bage (1775 KP) rated Soul (2020) in Movies

Jan 22, 2021  
Soul (2020)
Soul (2020)
2020 | Adventure, Animation, Comedy
When Disney Pixar launches a big new title it comes with a lot of expectation – there are just so many titles in the back catalogue now that will forever be considered classics. Movies that raised and re-raised the bar of what animation and family film storytelling can be at the very, very best.

So, when it was announced that Soul would be shown worldwide on the excellent Disney plus channel on Christmas Day, it was something of a coup that made it The movie event of the year, as many of us would now have the shared memory of watching it post lunch, as we struggled to keep our own cosy souls and eyelids awake enough to properly enjoy it.

I must admit that my opinion of it after one watch is tinted by being very close to a complete food coma shutdown. I will need to watch it again to fully appreciate it, I think. The main thing about doing it at all was how perfect and special it felt to be doing it on Christmas Day – nothing has felt more Christmassy to me film-wise since they first aired Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade on BBC1 in 1992. Such a treat with quality assured is rare indeed. The question was how good would it be in comparison to our favourites?

There were rumours from early reviews that it was more mature and adult themed than usual, and this seemed entirely true from the get go. Jazz music, a mellow vibe not racing headlong after easy laughs and the themes of existential angst and, well, death… it is quite grown up, to an extent. Not that young ones won’t enjoy it at all. It is as colourful and busy and joyous as any of them. Even if they can’t take in the concepts of the story in a deeper way, there is plenty to enjoy.

What it seems like Pixar were going for here is a film families of many generations can enjoy together; the older parents and grandparents explaining and reassuring in the deeper moments, and the young ones reminding the older ones to laugh at the silly bits! It was ever thus, but now the ambition to make it really about something significant seems achievable.

The theme of separation, loss and yes, even death is all over Pixar if you look for it. Especially with the recent Coco, which I thought was their best effort for several years. What they did with the theme of death in that one and here also is view it without fear, but as a celebration of the life that came before it, and the people that were touched by that life. It is the perennial Pixar message, that something which at first seems scary and sad is actually beautiful and wonderful if you look closer and choose to see it that way. And to their work in educating kids with that message I can only applaud in awe.

The animation itself is surprising. The “real” world being almost photo real to a jaw dropping degree, whilst the characters remain stylised. But it is the choices of simpler, somehow old fashioned styles in the before and after life sections that are striking. The semi luminous colours are also breath-taking: all calm aquamarine and soft pink, for every bright red and orange of Coco, but just as vibrant.

Pete Doctor who was responsible on this scale for Monster’s Inc, Up and Inside Out, holds the dual reigns of directing and writing expertly yet again, making things that are very hard to achieve look like cracking eggs! The voice talents of Jamie Foxx and Tina Fey do exactly what is needed in the roles without ever standing out as spectacular, as do minor roles for the likes of Graham Norton and Richard Ayoade. Spectacular is not what Soul is about, it is much more about solid qualities with deeper resonance. Personally, I never arrived at the tears in the eyes revelation moment. But that might be more about how warm and full and content I was than any criticism of something missing. There is every chance it is me that missed it.

Look, I don’t think anyone is going to be putting this amongst their top 5 Pixars any time soon, but I also can’t see anyone saying they didn’t enjoy it. The consensus seems to be “hmm, interesting, I need to think about that a while and see it again a few times”. So, for now, that is exactly what I am saying too. It may well be a classic that grows in appreciation over the years, or it may be one where you go, “nah, let’s watch Monster’s Inc. again instead”. Not sure. I’ll add a postscript right here when I have seen it a second time…
  
Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Candace Against the Universe (2020)
Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Candace Against the Universe (2020)
2020 | Adventure, Animation, Comedy
Like being back with old friends....
Tenet? I’m sorry, no, THIS was actually the biggest movie release of last week. Well, it is when you’re currently having to isolate at home and cannot go to the cinema for a few weeks. Despite that, I was actually way more excited for this to hit Disney+ this morning than a man my age probably should have been, and I have been for sometime, since it was first announced. I even managed to convince my daughter to get up early and watch with me, recreating those wonderful days when we both used to get up bright and early on a Saturday morning and sit and watch back to back episodes.

For the uninitiated, Phineas and Ferb are two step-brothers who spend their summer holiday coming up with highly elaborate ways to occupy every day, usually resulting in some wacky adventures and an extremely frustrated sister, Candace. Candace is forever trying to bust the boys and get their mum to catch them in the act, only to fail every time as some last second incident conveniently erases any evidence. Oh, and they also have a pet platypus called Perry, who without their knowledge works as an agent for a secret animal organisation, trying each episode to thwart the latest evil scheme hatched by Dr Doofenshmirtz. It’s very funny, features some incredibly catchy songs, and is just an extremely well written show for both kids and adults to enjoy. Running for four seasons, and racking up over 200 episodes before ending in 2015, the show also spawned a number of crossover specials involving Marvel and Star Wars.

Candace against the universe is the second feature length Phineas and Ferb movie and opens with Candace, lamenting the sad fact that no matter what she does, she never manages to successfully bust her brothers. All of this is delivered in the form of a song, and acts as a nostalgic reminder of some of the crazy inventions and adventures the boys have been involved in over the course of the series. The song ends with another perfect chance for Candace to bust the boys, who are currently enjoying themselves with their friends in the back garden. But of course, she fails. After heading out to the front of the house, and meeting up with friend Vanessa, she spots an alien spaceship. Believing her brothers to be behind it somehow, she and Vanessa are sucked up inside, before taking off and shooting up into the sky.

The boys see Candace flying away in the ship, and after photographing the alien license plate, are able to quickly identify where she’s headed (as you do…). They round up the gang and quickly rustle up a portal in their back garden (as you do…), in order to jump to the planet where Candace is being taken. The portal takes them via Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc, where they pick up Heinz Doofenshmirtz and Perry the Platypus (unknowingly), before heading off in a spaceship of their own. When they do catch up with Candace, they discover that she is being hailed as ‘the chosen one’ by the alien race that captured her. But does the queen of the planet have a more sinister reason for bringing Candace all this way?

It’s fair to say that, unless you’re already a fan of the show, you’re unlikely to have any interest whatsoever in watching Candace Against the Universe. For fans of the show though, this is a wonderful trip down memory lane, unless you’ve already spent all of lockdown recently catching up on all of the episodes on Disney+, and it feels so good to be back in the company of such wonderful characters. There’s a lot of comfort to be had from the running gags and themes of the episode format of the show, and the only thing I found with this movie, and the crossover shows, is that they end up feeling like a dragged out episode at times, tending to sag a little around the middle.

It’s a very minor complaint though. The songs are as good as ever, including a song from Doofenshmirtz about ‘adulting’, and the humour is still smart and on point, although Buford does tend to get some of the funnier lines in my opinion. And when Buford gets ridiculed for bringing a canoe with him on their trip to the alien planet, and Doofenshmirtz gets laughed at for inventing something as stupid as a “Chicken Replace-inator” – basically a gun which swaps whatever you fire at with the nearest chicken – you just know they’re working on delivering us some great gags later on throughout the movie. And obviously, Perry the Platypus gets to save the day as usual, and without anyone even realising it. It’s like being back in the company of old friends. Fingers crossed that this isn’t the last we see of Phineas, Ferb and the gang.
  
Slaughterhouse Rulez (2018)
Slaughterhouse Rulez (2018)
2018 | Comedy, Horror
Form-Prefect of the Dead.
The Plot
Meredith Houseman (Simon Pegg) is housemaster of Sparta house in Slaughterhouse school: an ancient public school establishment steering England’s future greats to greatness (which probably explains a lot about the current Brexit mess!). Houseman is not in a happy place, given that his girlfriend is now in deepest darkest African doing “good works” with handsome French doctors, and particularly that she is played by Margot Robbie: I would be also be sad… #punching!

New school starter Don Wallace (Finn Cole) is equally unhappy as he is a northern teen dragooned into attending the school by his well-meaning Mum (Jo Hartley). His strange room-mate Willoughby (Asa Butterfield) seems to be a chronic depressive; he is being picked on by the prefect-bully Clegg (Tom Rhys Harries); and his bed was previously occupied by a Viscount, since deceased under unpleasant circumstances that no-one wants to talk about. At least he has the distraction of the upper-sixth school goddess Clemsie Lawrence (Hermione Corfield) to take his mind off his woes.

All this washes over “The Bat” – the school’s headmaster (Michael Sheen) – since he is engrossed in some shady deal with an evil corporation doing fracking in the school grounds. The fracking though seems to be doing more than just causing a few minor earth tremors, as ancient forces are unleashed.

The Review
The movie is positioned as a “comedy/horror”, along the lines of “Shaun of the Dead”. The film also has Frost and Pegg as executive producers and they also have starring roles in the film. But there the similarities really end: this is a “Cornetto film” without a cone of solid chocolate lurking at the bottom to enjoy.

The script (by director Crispian Mills and first-time screenwriter Henry Fitzherbert) is nowhere near as sharp as the Frost/Pegg scripts for their famous collaborations. The story overall makes precious little sense: it’s a hodge-podge of elements from many Harry Potter films (especially “The Chamber of Secrets”), Lindsay Anderson’s “If…”; and Roy Boulting’s “The Guinea Pig”; with also a sprinkling of the anarchic essence of Michael Palin’s classic “Tomkinson’s Schooldays”. The whole thing never manages to gel into a cohesive whole.

After the second reel, the film completely loses sight of the plot: there’s a whole lot of running, screaming and dying going on but there’s little logic behind any of it that I could fathom. What didn’t help my comprehension of what was going on were some ‘Cornetto-esque’ sequences of manic editing. Images were thrown onto the screen so subliminally that any clever nuance was lost. I’m sure at one point there was a droll (if gross) segue at a “Roman orgy” of a girl receiving oral sex before being ‘eaten out’ in an entirely different way. But you would need a Blu-ray and a frame-by-frame pause function to get the joke.

That’s not to say that I didn’t laugh a few times along the way. There are some sight gags – for example, Wooten (Kit Connor) as the lad at the bottom of the bullying pecking order, chained to a U-bend – that made me laugh, and some running jokes – for example, Frost as the head of the anti-fracking camp offering the kids drugs at every encounter – that mildly amuse. But once again here’s a British comedy that, like the atrocious “The Brits are Coming“, thinks that “funny” largely revolves around swearing a lot – how useful that “frack” sounds so similar to another word – with added bodily dismemberment.

The turns
Pegg and Frost ham it up with their usual comedy schtick well enough, and it was quite fun to see Sheen try a comedy role for a change as the conniving and supercilious headmaster. Elsewhere all the young cast put their hearts into it, but it’s again Asa Butterfield that your eyes gravitate to, due to his striking features. I last saw Asa in the excellent if harrowing WW1 drama “Journey’s End“, and he here proves again that he is a One Mann’s Movies ‘name to watch for the future’.

Final thoughts
There’s a lot to irritate in this film. From the “z” in the title to… well… about 80% of the film. There is no nuance or subtlety to either the writing or the direction. I think that’s a great shame. The film has a good premise hidden in there. An adult comedy set around the ridiculous rules and rites of public schools (away from the light nonsense of “St Trinians”) is overdue. And the whole subject of fracking, and the conflicts surrounding the controversial techniques, hasn’t yet – to my knowledge – been explored in a fictional movie. The film does have a few very funny moments. But as a whole I left the cinema with that “wasted two hours” feeling. Not recommended.