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Death on the Nile (2022)
Death on the Nile (2022)
2022 | Mystery
I don't like to go into a film with a negative impression... but... #NotMyPoirot #SlashTheStash.

Linnet Ridgeway goes to Poirot with fears for her safety, and that of her new husband, when an old mutual acquaintance shows up at each new location on their honeymoon.

An Agatha Christie novel always makes for a great plot, and this one has had several different adaptations over the years. Don't go into it expecting a faithful adaptation though, this one comes out a bit spicier. It also takes some liberties with Poirot's backstory, which does add some interesting context to things about him, but at the same time, it's not the source material.

As with Death Train, Death Boat has a star-studded cast. While I love most of them in other things, I found the whole dynamic to be a little all over the place. Tom Bateman and Ali Fazal were solid, Russell Brand was surprisingly good, but everyone else was either rather bland or too over the top. Then there's Kenneth... I'll give it to them, it feels wrong thinking that Poirot is sexy... but there's one moment where even I, a Ken denier, took a sharp intake of breath.

Death on the Nile comes in at 2 hours and 7 minutes, had they cut what felt like 10 minutes of Gal Gadot walking down the length of the ship, it could easily have come in under 2 hours.

I think that identifies the issue I have with these new adaptations. This one in particular has a very theatrical feel to it. A lot of the boat shots early on feel like you're watching it happen on a stage. I don't object to that style, I like watching theatre, but having it thrown in randomly threw me.

My other big gripe was the choice of shots. Death Boat really likes to not show you faces when people are talking. Watching these scenes was off-putting, it felt like they'd been re-edited and had a new audio track overlaid... badly. There's also a scene where the camera swoops backwards and forwards between the people who are talking, and after a while, I could feel the motion sickness building.

It isn't until films like this come out that you realise just how much of one is computer generated. I have to assume that the majority of this budget went on the cast, it certainly wasn't spent on the effects. The de-aging on Branagh in the opening was awful, and must have cost more than hiring a younger actor to do those scenes. The generated scenery wasn't any better, it was painfully obvious which weren't real.

Death on the Nile is, at the end of the day, another classic Christie story, and even with some butchering, there's still a great mystery to unfold. That being said, I would rather sit through one of the other adaptations again if they were all laid out in front of me.

Originally posted on: https://emmaatthemovies.blogspot.com/2022/02/death-on-nile-movie-review.html
  
BO
Blade of secrets
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Title: Blade of Secrets
Author: Tricia Levenseller

This book and it's cover were both amazing. Thank you to Bookishfirst for sending me a copy of it to review.

The book starts off as Ziva a magical bladesmoth dealing with a Karen customer who hurt himself on his blade.

Quote: "It's not nearly as hurt as your pride else you would be at a healers and not here." Page 5. I agree this is very true and he is acting like a two year old which I found hilarious.

Quote: "How can a man who injures himself with his own weapon be dangerous?" Page 7. This had me laughing.

Than the story went on to Ziva meeting Petrik who specializes in ancient magic and wants her help writing the book he's working on. He's an important character in this book so pay attention. I didn't trust him at first he gave bad vibes but in the end he was on Zivas side.

Quote: "This mace steals the breathe of surrounding enemies! It can kill without even touching an opponent, and yet it sits above the mantel as though it were a-a-decoration!" I agree I would have been mad to putting a good magical weapon to no use. Can just use a normal non-magicked mace for a decoration. Ansel goes to try to kiss her and doesn't understand no means no. Quote: "You think saying a few nice words to me earns you a kiss? That's not how it works." This is 100% true and many people need to learn to understand this. He goes on to have a fit but his parents end up believing her. She also meets Warlord Kymora Avedin during this time. She can't be trusted and I also found it funny Ansel didn't get his way.

When Ziva is making the sword for Kymora she sees Kellyn who is important in this story for the first time. The swords magic is made from her feelings for him and her telling it all her secrets. Which was amazing I loved it that part was intense. When showing Kymora it cuts Kymora and Ziva finds out she can hear the victims secrets when it cuts them.

Two of Kymoras secrets are:

Quote "This weapon will make me unbeatable in combat." Which can be a good thing if your a good guy she's not.

Quote "I will crush Ghadra's pathetic rulers and reunite the regions under one rule once more: my own. The people will be enslaved to my will. The royal family will all bow before me. Right before I remove their heads." This is where I couldn't put it down. For the safety of her country and sister they decided to run. Their journey was fun and interesting. I loved it. Ziva and Kellyn fall for each other and she finally opens up about her anxiety which I can relate to. I loved this story and can't wait to read the next one. It has an amazing but sad cliffhanger ending.

P.S. It's on my favorites shelf now.
  
Victim: The Cursed Forest
Victim: The Cursed Forest
2020 | Adventure, Exploration, Horror, Maze, Miniatures
I mean, who WOULDN’T be frightened out of their undies when one of their traveling mates just suddenly becomes… something else… and chases them through a very odd forest? But yet, here is where we now play. In a vast forest with danger around every curve, and a horrific presence taunting the party with the imminent possession of their very bodies. A far cry from prancing about a candied forest in an attempt to reach the summit: Candy Castle. Board games have definitely evolved, and boy am I glad for that!

Victim: The Cursed Forest (which I shall from here call simply “Victim”) is a horror survival game where players assume the roles of survivors of a plane crash. Each survivor, which in the game are actually called Victims, must race against time and nightmare fiends in order to reach the safety bunker until saviors come rescue them. However, early in the game one of their own is possessed by the lurking horror and then turns on the party to pick them off one by one. It’s up to the victims to race to the bunker and input the correct code to open its hatch to relative safety!

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup, basically shuffle each deck separately, and place the Bunker map tile in the bottom six of the stack, then split that into two stacks. Place out all the chits however makes sense for your table (organized for me, thank you), and each player chooses one of the characters to play and collects all their goodies. The Start Tile is laid down, the player minis are placed upon it and the chase is on!
Each turn the players will have several choices of actions to complete, with two actions available to be taken on their turn. Primarily, players will be Running around the map to different tiles and exploring their special characteristics. Some tiles allow players to search them for Item cards, some allow players to Decode as an action, and some also require players to pass certain tests of abilities. These tests correspond to each player’s abilities of Agility, Intelligence, Vitality, and Luck. The ability scores are different for each character and can be improved or worsened throughout the game. Character boards also will show each character’s special skills that can be used on a turn.

Once all players have completed their two actions in turn order, the last player will flip an Event card that may be active for the entirety of the next round. Sometimes these Events affect only characters on certain tile types, or even adjust ability scores and Items held. However, at the end of the second or third round of play (depending on the number of players), the ominous Curse Phase is completed.

The Curse Phase is a special one-time insert that has all players make a test against one of the four abilities. The lowest score for the test then becomes the host for the Evil that will ravage the party and wreak hell on the other players. The player no longer controls their chosen character, but immediately becomes the Evil that was drawn and now plays the game against the other players. The Evil takes their turn at the end of the round, just before the Event card is drawn.

Once the Evil enters play in earnest, the game quickly shifts from a nice exploration and map building game to a race against time to earn bunker password tokens from the Decoding tiles and avoid all attacks from the now raging Evil chasing the players. I will not describe the entirety of battle and Evil special abilities, but battle is a very simple Attack roll vs. Defense roll for one wound. When a player sustains two wounds, they are considered to have a Critical Injury and may only Crawl to another player in hopes of receiving healing or to arrive on a tile with healing properties upon it. However, a character that has been Critically Injured is ripe for the Evil’s Death Skill. The Death Skill is how the Evil is able to remove characters (and thusly players) from the game and decrease the odds of the Victims’ victory.


Play continues in this fashion of players taking their turns, then the Evil takes their turn, then the Event card is drawn as the last part of each round, until either the players collect the correct tokens to solve the hatch passcode and earn safety, or the Evil takes out the required number of characters for their victory. All this can be accomplished in a mere 45-90 minutes. Absolutely.
Components. Never having heard of Hexa House prior to arranging for this review, I had no idea what to expect in terms of components. However, this game comes in a very large box, the insert is kind of perfect (which is saying a lot, especially since it is a vacuum form), and everything inside the box is really great! I’m not really a miniatures kinda guy, but I can appreciate them. Standees are just as good to me, but I think these minis are above-average from my experience. The cards, the art style, the custom dice, everything just hits really well.

So you probably noticed my weird ratings graphic up top. Well, I will admit that my graphic design skills are, well, amateur at best. So I just created a 5 point 5 because I really feel this one is just amazing. Now, some people may have some small issues with the rule book, but please read it with a grain of salt: I believe they originate in Thai or Laotian languages and are translated to English. I didn’t have problems reading it at all, but had a couple questions. I tried playing several different ways when I had these questions, and usually just one option was really viable anyway.

That said, everything else about this game is truly wonderful. I sincerely enjoy that sudden shift near the beginning of the game where one player becomes the big baddie and comes for the rest of the players. Depending on placement and buddy systems that formed in the first part of the game, the Evil player will have either a feast setup before themselves, or have to do a bit of work to track down the characters to orchestrate their attack. I know I didn’t go into a whole lot of detail on what the Evil player can do on their turns, but it boils down to basically Hunt (run), Attack, and trap.

This base game ships with six Victims and six Evils. I have yet to see all the Evils in my plays, as the mechanic for determining which Evil surfaces is dependent on a draw of a card from a shuffled deck. That said, even when an Evil enters the game that I have played before, the players were different, and the map was different, and the placement of characters was different, so it did not feel “samey” to me at all.

I will admit that the most frustrating aspect of the game is the bunker hatch passcode. Okay, so once the Bunker tile is placed, a new component enters play: the Bunker board. A hole in the middle of the board is to house a Gate Token. This Gate Token is simply a target number that the players need to achieve using the different Number and Symbol Tokens won from successful Decode actions. The Number Tokens are simply 1-6, and the Symbol Tokens are plus/minus/multiply/divide. Therefore, in order to meet the Gate Token showing 35 players would need to gather 6 x 5 + 3 + 2. That is seven different successes at the Decoder tiles, and best case scenario has players pulling those exactly and no others. When you are playing a game that is a race against time (or death, in this instance), these little setbacks can cost the entire game – that is, if players simply cannot pass the test needed for a success at the Decoder tile. Frustrating, yes, but also a very cool addition to this style of game.

Victim has completely surprised me, and I am so thankful I had the opportunity to add this to my collection. My strong recommendation is that if you see one of these in the wild – GRAB IT. There are hours and hours of gameplay in this box, and I haven’t even touched the expansion for it yet (expect another review of that in the near future as well). Purple Phoenix Games officially gives this one a 5.5 / 6 (we NEVER do half points), but I feel like with even more plays, and with the expansion to be added soon, this may give my Top 10 list a shakeup still this year. If you are a fan of games like Betrayal at House on the Hill and Posthuman, then you need to check this one out for sure. Oh, did I mention that there is a LOT of dice rolling here too? Guess I just left that until the end for my dice-chucking lovers.
  
A Portable Shelter
A Portable Shelter
Kirsty Logan | 2016 | Fiction & Poetry
9
8.0 (3 Ratings)
Book Rating
Cute little stories about real life (0 more)
Took a while to get in to (0 more)
‘…there’s no other way to give you the truth except to hide it in a story and let you find your own way inside.’
‘…there’s no other way to give you the truth except to hide it in a story and let you find your own way inside.’
Kirsty Logan’s first collection of short stories, The Rental Heart and Other Fairytales, published by Salt in 2014, won the Polari First Book Prize in 2015. A Portable Shelter is her second collection. Set in a small cottage in the rural north coast of Scotland, Ruth and Liska are expecting their first child. The couple believe that their unborn baby will have a better chance of survival away from the harshness of suburban life. They make a pact with one another, that they will only ever tell their child the truth. Yet while Liska is asleep or Ruth is at work, each whispers secret stories to their unborn child. Delving into fantastical tales about people from their past and re-telling stories that span from generation to generation, the couple unfold the horrors of the real world. Whilst these tales, laced in myth and legend, and fattened with the magic of the imagination, demonstrate the art of oral storytelling, Logan reaches further to show the reader why storytelling is important.
While this book is primarily a collection of short stories, its novel like structure frames each story with a preceding monologue from either Ruth or Liska. The monologues offer delightful morsels of description that bring the harshness of Mother Nature into the safety of the couple’s bedroom, “right now our home is speaking to you. The walls creak their approval in the wind. The rain applauds on the roof. The lighthouse beam swoops, swoops, swoops. The tide breathes loud and slow like a giant. If you listen carefully, perhaps you can even hear the moon hum.” The pace of these sentences, combined with the delicacy of language demonstrates Logan’s skill at describing the sublime spirit of the natural world, which brings the narrative to life.
Most impressive though, is Logan’s poetic language and carefully crafted sentences which create the most beautiful imagery. In ‘Flinch,’ for example – James is a fisherman struggling with his identity, yet his affiliation with the land is locked into his first-person point of view where the reader gets to closely experience what he sees, “The sky is pinkish-grey like the insides of shells. Speckled bonxies wheel overhead. Seals loll on the rocks, fat as kings. The rising mist is cool and milky.” Any of these lines could easily be arranged into a poem and with sentences that are squeezed tight; they create a wonderful poetic rhythm. Logan uses this technique throughout her novel, demonstrating the precision and craft in her work. There are definite similarities in her writing style to fellow Scottish novelist and poet Jenni Fagan. Both authors use rich language, which is well crafted and smattered with vernacular. Furthermore, combining this with the reoccurring theme of identity, the oral storytelling tradition, landscape, folklore, and myth, it is clear to see why these authors contribute to the growing canon in Scottish literature.
This is a book that I will read over and over again because I know that in each reading, I will find something new. A Portable Shelter, I feel, deserves a place on my ‘keep’ book shelf.
A Portable Shelter, Kirsty Logan, London: Vintage, 2015
  
The Grey (2012)
The Grey (2012)
2012 | Action, Drama
8
7.0 (15 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Is there ever a better match up than Liam Neeson and a good solid action flick? This reviewer thinks not and this is exactly what we have here. However, Joe Carnahan’s latest offering, The Grey is a lot more than the formulaic paint by numbers action movie.

The Grey focuses on a group of men working away from home in the Alaskan oil fields. On their way back to safety, the worst happens and the plane the unlucky fellows are travelling in crashes in spectacular fashion. The crash in the first sequence of the movie is absolutely stunning and one of the best I’ve seen on the silver screen; it even makes the plane crash in the original Final Destination look tame.

The survivors of the plane crash include Neeson’s Alpha male character John Ottway and those of you familiar with the Irishman’s style of acting will know what to expect here; there’s a quiet sense of foreboding throughout and this only adds to the tension which is creatively built up throughout the 117 minute running time.

The team soon realise that they’re being stalked by a pack of hungry wolves that are, shall we say, less than happy about the intruders wandering around their territory and in the usual thriller style, they’re picked off one, by one.


The other male leads include Frank Grillo as the disobedient John Diaz and Joe Anderson as outsider, Todd Flannery. Unfortunately, through no fault of their own, the other actors get lost behind Neeson’s commanding performance, one of the best of his career in fact.

Dialogue and plot generally take a back seat to the scares in this genre of film but thankfully Carnahan and his writing team demand audience respect for these characters and for the most part, it all works and ties together nicely. Ottway is a deeply troubled and desperately unhappy man who on occasions has tried to take his own life. However, once coming face to face with the snarling jaws of a grey wolf, he soon realises that running and fighting for his life is perhaps the best course of action.

Naturally, the Alaskan wilderness provides an eerie and mesmerising setting (there’s not a green screen in sight) and Carnahan cracks up the tension fantastically by not being obvious in his editing. The shots of the CGI and puppet wolves are integrated very well and apart from a few shoddy scenes where it becomes a little obvious they’re not real , the outcome is deeply disturbing and the animals look 100% believable.

Overall, The Grey is everything a thrilling creature feature should be. Director, Joe Carnahan, racks up tension on every occasion physically possible and grabs the audience with beautiful Alaskan scenery dispersed amidst the chaos. Liam Neeson really steals the show with a commanding and heart-wrenching performance whilst his co-stars do well, despite being overshadowed.

The special effects and plot all have depth and this ensures The Grey has enough bite to keep even the most difficult audiences entertained. Yes, it’s a little too long for the genre, but you don’t feel this whilst watching because of how well the film has been crafted. It really is a must watch.

https://moviemetropolis.net/2012/03/13/the-grey-2012-review/
  
The Purge (2013)
The Purge (2013)
2013 | Mystery, Sci-Fi
Ethan Hawke is no stranger to the horror genre, in 2009 he starred in the Australian vampire flick Daybreakers, a film which promised so much, and delivered relatively little. Now he teams up with director James DeMonaco in a horror film that promises to be anything but ordinary; The Purge, but can it live up to its exciting trailer?

The Purge plays out like a poor-man’s Hunger Games. In the year 2020, America is prospering, crime is at an all-time low and unemployment is at 1%. The reason? Once a year, for twelve hours, all crime is legal and people across US can commit any atrocities they wish.

Ethan Hawke plays James Sandin, a security salesman who has capitalised on the public’s fear of being ‘purged’ by selling hi-tech safety equipment to the rich to ensure they stay safe. Lena Headey plays his wife Mary and his two children, Charlie and Zoe are played by Max Burkholder and Adelaide Kane respectively. In a moment of madness after the commencement of the annual purge, a ‘target’ (Edwin Hodge) is let into their home causing all hell to break loose.

Borrowing heavily from other ‘home invasion’ horror films such as When a Stranger Calls and The Strangers, The Purge really ‘gets going’ about two-thirds in when an army of killers swoop on Ethan Hawke’s impressive property looking for their ‘target.’ The family have one hour to reply before they all become ‘targets.’

Unfortunately, an exciting and unique premise is completely lost in a film that is riddled with many horror clichés, some of them blatantly obvious, (woman opening fridge door, door closes and harmless child shocks woman), some not so obvious. This is a terrible shame as the idea of all crime being legal is ridiculously exciting, but after about 40 minutes, we are locked in the Sandin’s home as they play cat and mouse with an array of forgettable serial killers and the original story is lost.

Another problem is the acting. Competent is the only word to describe it; Ethan Hawke is good in his role and his stern demeanour which has earned him so many acting jobs in the past is in full force here, but you can’t help feeling he was a budgetary decision rather than being who the producers actually wanted. Lena Headey seems to phone in a rather wooden performance, whilst the two kids do marginally better. By far the stand-out here is Rhys Wakefield, credited only as ‘Polite Stranger’ who is excellent and terrifying as equal measure; his facial expressions are enough to make you wince.

Overall, The Purge is an exciting film that delivers some unique thrills and spills mixed in with the usual horror clichés. Unfortunately, it doesn’t deliver on its unique and exciting starting point and delves into a generic slasher film around 45 minutes in. A stand-out performance from one of the cast isn’t enough to lift the acting above mediocre and the Sandin family are as characters, frightfully dull. It’s definitely worth a watch, but don’t let the trailer fool you; it’s not as unique as you might expect.

The new review system breaks down the film into categories allowing you, as the readers to see just where I have awarded points to the film. It is still in a testing stage, so if there are any categories you think could improve it, please let me know.

https://moviemetropolis.net/2013/05/31/the-purge-review-2013/
  
Mom and Dad (2018)
Mom and Dad (2018)
2018 | Comedy, Horror
Nicholas Cage (2 more)
Great idea
Superb dialogue
Some damn fine fun with Cage and Blair
Contains spoilers, click to show
Two people who you should be able to count on for your safety as a child are your Mother and Father. But that doesn' ring true in this amazing little film by writer/director Brian Taylor.
The film's opening sequence shows a woman in a minivan with a baby in the backseat. The radio plays some strange static and out of nowhere she looks back to the infant and exits the vehicle. Leaving the baby and the van to meet their demise via an oncoming train.
What follows is pure genius and insanity that is topped by Nick Cage doing what Nick Cage does best. Losing it onscreen with a fever that only my he can provide.
Selma Blair holds her own as Cafe's seemingly mild mannered wife who turns on a dime and joins him in the craziness with a certain flair comparable to Cages insane bravado.
The kids, played by Anne Winters and Zachary Arthur, fight their parents with some Home Alonish antics that prove to serve them well.
No one can fully say what it is that officially makes the parents around the world turn on their kids. But it has something to do with white noise and static on televisions and radios across the planet. Parents instinct to protect their young like a bear is replaced with the feeling off ultimate anger and insanity.
In one scene, Blair is at the hospital coaching her sister through birth. The the is born and handed to the mother and a monitor goes all static filled and noisy. The sister clutches the baby tightly, beginnng to cut off the airwaves and choking the child. Blair rips the newborn from her sister in an attempt to protect her. But something driving her sister forces her to stand upright and destroy the baby. She ultimately fails and is sedated.
The best performance in this film goes hands down to Nicholas Cage. Who freaks out like only Cage can. And even though his appeaance resembles a slightly bloated version of Marilyn Manson. His ability to use his expression and booming voice to command insanity is off the charts amazing.
I recall a scene where the kids are locked in the basement trying to escape their folks. And Blair and Cage are looking for a way to break down the door. Nicholas bangs on the door, shaking and screaming a line i will never forget "Your motherfucking Mother said to open this goddamn door, Motherfuckers!!!! Youre going to open this motherfucking door!!!!". Cage goes one way Blair goes another... she gets a reciprocating saw and brings it to the door. Her line, while simple, is unforgettable. "It's called a Saws all because it saws all,".
She begins hacking and at the door as Cage is upstairs looking for his gun... he hears shots and runs downstairs, finding Blair sitting on the floor nursing a fresh gunshot to the arm. He freaks out and explains the gun to his wife who quotes some stats about kids hurting themselves and others with handguns. Irony at its finest.
All in all, this movie never gets boring after the parents begin to try and kill their kids. It's only better when Cages character Brent's folks show up and attempt to kill him. Lance Henricksons performance as the father is extreme and awesome.
Watch this movie if you have a spare 90 minutes, i promise you it will motherfucking not disappoint, Motherfuckers:)
  
40x40

Lee (2222 KP) rated Skyscraper (2018) in Movies

Jul 13, 2018  
Skyscraper (2018)
Skyscraper (2018)
2018 | Action
Surprising Enjoyable Action Movie
As I headed into Skyscraper at my local cinema, I tweeted something about disengaging my brain for a couple of hours, fully open to the prospect of some completely ridiculous action, courtesy of Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson. That's exactly what I ended up with, and I actually really enjoyed it all too.

The movie opens 10 years ago, with FBI agent Will Sawyer (Johnson) and his team attending a domestic hostage situation which goes badly wrong. Back in the present, Will is now an amputee and married to the military nurse that cared for him during that incident (Neve Campbell). They've got 2 young kids and the whole family is in Hong Kong where Will has been hired as security consultant for The Pearl, a new state-of-the-art skyscraper and the tallest building in the world. A news reel montage fires off lots of impressive facts and figures about the building, hardly giving you time to digest or even question them. Let's just say, it cost billions of dollars, looks incredibly futuristic (and a bit silly) and is a scientific wonder of the world. Before The Pearl opens up its doors for people to live and work in though, Will needs to sign off on fire safety and security.

We're shown Will putting on his false leg, letting us know how that all works in preparation for later scenes in the movie. Will then fixes his wife's phone before he rushes out of the door and ushers a line so obviously important to the movie it's actually annoyingly distracting. So important is this piece of information, he actually uses two variations of it within minutes of each other too - "Remember, you can fix 90% of problems by just turning it off and on again...". Like I say, just disengage your brain, don't worry about it, and you'll be fine.

If you've seen the trailer, you'll have gathered that Wills family are the only residents in The Pearl, with the buildings owner and his team way up top in the penthouse. You'll have gathered that this is attempting to be a Die Hard / Towering Inferno crossover, and that there are bad guys involved. You'll no doubt have also seen the famous leap from a crane by Dwayne Johnsons character into the burning skyscraper. This is where the movie really kicks into action.

Now, I was watching this in 3D, so I'm not sure if it will have quite the same effect on a TV screen at home, but I was literally on the edge of my seat whenever Will was either dangling or jumping 96 floors in the air (which is a lot), while a Hong Kong crowd gasps and cheers on the streets below. The action and peril is relentless, repeatedly moving Will and his family from one dangerous set piece to another. While not quite as funny or charming as he is in his other movies, Skyscraper is still all about Dwayne Johnson though, and all other characters come out of this pretty short changed. Neve Campbell gets a couple of chances to kick some ass, but otherwise she's pretty underused. The bad guys aren't particularly effective, or memorable, neither are the police team down on the ground.

It's predictable and it's ridiculous. But I absolutely loved it.