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Gareth von Kallenbach (980 KP) rated Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo (2005) in Movies
Aug 14, 2019
Europe. The very name brings up images of rich traditions, centuries-old stunning architecture, fine cuisine, historic artwork, and of course culture and sophistication. Europe has endured wars, plagues, and hordes of unruly soccer fans and has remained intact. Perhaps its greatest challenge is about to arrive in the form of Deuce Bigalow, pool cleaner, fish lover, and male Gigolo.
Rob Schneider returns as Deuce, who has given up his man-whoring ways and married the girl of his dreams. As the film opens, we learn that Deuce was widowed on his honeymoon and has carried a torch for his departed wife for years. The fact that the torch in question is actually her artificial limb is a creepy sentiment that further isolates Deuce from those around him.
After a day at the beach goes horribly wrong, Deuce happily accepts an invitation from his friend T.J. (Eddie Griffin), and travels to Amsterdam for some time away. With the artificial limb in tow, Deuce arrives and learns that a mysterious killer has been dispatching Europe’s top gigolos and before you can say “space cake” T.J. is implicated in the murders and on the run, forcing Deuce to go back to his man-whoring in an effort to learn who is behind the killings.
Since Deuce witnessed the aftermath of a recent killing, he is convinced that the killer is a woman and that only by dating those clients of the recently departed can he find the proof needed to free T.J.
Of course Deuce doesn’t get the cream of society. His clients are a mixed bag that makes his Janes from the first film seem normal. There is the lady with the gaping hole in her throat, a lady whose ears put Dumbo’s to shame, a giant with an infant fetish, and a woman with a male sex organ for a nose.
It is against this backdrop that Deuce meets Eva (Hanna Verboom), an artist with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and the daughter of the police inspector
investigating the case. Deuce is taken with the charming Eva which leads to even more conflict for the widowed Deuce.
As if his life could not get any worse, Deuce is at odds with the European Society of Man Pimps who constantly go out of their way to taunt Deuce and his inclusion in their profession.
Over the next 90 minutes a constant barrage of crude jokes ensues ranging from the gross to the juvenile. Yet despite the ongoing crude and sophomoric humor, I found myself laughing as did the majority of the audience at my screening.
While I can see how many critics will not like this film due to a very basic story, thin characters and crudeness, the film works very well as a mindless comedy.
The characters are not expanded from their roles in the original and do not need to be. We know that Deuce is an easy going loser with a heart of gold and that is all we need to know.
Schneider and Griffin work well with one another and the constant euphemisms such as Mangina, He-Hoe and Hegina flow often only to be followed by new and even more creative phrases.
If you are a fan of the original and do not get offended easily than this is going to be your film. It isn’t trying to break new ground, it is trying to make you laugh, and for this critic, despite the films flaws, I laughed constantly throughout, and in many cases harder than I have at any film in recent years.
Rob Schneider returns as Deuce, who has given up his man-whoring ways and married the girl of his dreams. As the film opens, we learn that Deuce was widowed on his honeymoon and has carried a torch for his departed wife for years. The fact that the torch in question is actually her artificial limb is a creepy sentiment that further isolates Deuce from those around him.
After a day at the beach goes horribly wrong, Deuce happily accepts an invitation from his friend T.J. (Eddie Griffin), and travels to Amsterdam for some time away. With the artificial limb in tow, Deuce arrives and learns that a mysterious killer has been dispatching Europe’s top gigolos and before you can say “space cake” T.J. is implicated in the murders and on the run, forcing Deuce to go back to his man-whoring in an effort to learn who is behind the killings.
Since Deuce witnessed the aftermath of a recent killing, he is convinced that the killer is a woman and that only by dating those clients of the recently departed can he find the proof needed to free T.J.
Of course Deuce doesn’t get the cream of society. His clients are a mixed bag that makes his Janes from the first film seem normal. There is the lady with the gaping hole in her throat, a lady whose ears put Dumbo’s to shame, a giant with an infant fetish, and a woman with a male sex organ for a nose.
It is against this backdrop that Deuce meets Eva (Hanna Verboom), an artist with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and the daughter of the police inspector
investigating the case. Deuce is taken with the charming Eva which leads to even more conflict for the widowed Deuce.
As if his life could not get any worse, Deuce is at odds with the European Society of Man Pimps who constantly go out of their way to taunt Deuce and his inclusion in their profession.
Over the next 90 minutes a constant barrage of crude jokes ensues ranging from the gross to the juvenile. Yet despite the ongoing crude and sophomoric humor, I found myself laughing as did the majority of the audience at my screening.
While I can see how many critics will not like this film due to a very basic story, thin characters and crudeness, the film works very well as a mindless comedy.
The characters are not expanded from their roles in the original and do not need to be. We know that Deuce is an easy going loser with a heart of gold and that is all we need to know.
Schneider and Griffin work well with one another and the constant euphemisms such as Mangina, He-Hoe and Hegina flow often only to be followed by new and even more creative phrases.
If you are a fan of the original and do not get offended easily than this is going to be your film. It isn’t trying to break new ground, it is trying to make you laugh, and for this critic, despite the films flaws, I laughed constantly throughout, and in many cases harder than I have at any film in recent years.
Becs (244 KP) rated Seven at Sea in Books
Jul 29, 2019
Captivating memoir on taking risks
TRIGGER WARNINGS: mild swearing and peril
**Possible spoilers ahead**
Working a temp job night shift in a cubicle in Manhattan to help provide for his wife and their five children, the youngest with Down Syndrome, Erik Orton knew something had to change. Watching the sailboats on the Hudson River during his breaks, he dared to dream, and craved a life that was full of more than just surviving day to day. Despite having no sailing experience, his wife Emily’s phobia of deep water, and already being financially stretched, the family of seven turned their excuses into reasons and their fears into motivation as they set off on a voyage that ultimately took them 5,000 miles from New York to the Caribbean and back. Their journey that included plenty of learning and adventure, showed them the value of doing things their own way, and most importantly gave them time together as a family before their oldest daughter left for college.
And while this memoir is incredibly inspiring, and the Ortons did certainly gain a lot from sailing with their family for a year, the takeaway of Seven at Sea is not that all of us should quit our jobs and buy sailboats. The book serves as an encouraging reminder that our lives can be what we make them regardless of what society dictates. Many of us, especially parents, tend to fell stuck in our circumstances. The Ortons show us that on a large or small scale, we can imagine more boldly than we usually allow for and dare to dream of a life that doesn’t look anything like the one we have now – and still manage to be great parents, spouses, and members of society.
I am generally not taken with memoirs as they never capture my attention, but this was so good! I was captivated and enthralled from the get go. The narration was told in both Erik and Emily’s point of view. That added a fun and interesting appeal to this novel.
One thing I loved while reading was how the highs and the lows of taking such a risk like this were included. Erik and Emily keep it authentic, unique, and honest. It was really well-written and has as much adventure as an action novel! The one thing worth noting that I had a problem with, was that it was a slow read. It took a bit more time and motivation to read, but this adventure story made up for it. Emily’s insight helped round out Erik’s insight. She was the glue that held everything together, while Erik was the lumber. This memoir tells a story of risks and going the road less traveled by. Seven at Sea teaches the reader that the journey is the destination and that relationships are the most important things we have, that we should always strive to strengthen and refine them.
Most people can’t take the risk of just up and leaving their current situation like Erik and Emily did with their five children. Seven at Sea reminds us that our lives are what we make of them and that we should all have the courage to seek our dream lives whatever they may be.
**Possible spoilers ahead**
Working a temp job night shift in a cubicle in Manhattan to help provide for his wife and their five children, the youngest with Down Syndrome, Erik Orton knew something had to change. Watching the sailboats on the Hudson River during his breaks, he dared to dream, and craved a life that was full of more than just surviving day to day. Despite having no sailing experience, his wife Emily’s phobia of deep water, and already being financially stretched, the family of seven turned their excuses into reasons and their fears into motivation as they set off on a voyage that ultimately took them 5,000 miles from New York to the Caribbean and back. Their journey that included plenty of learning and adventure, showed them the value of doing things their own way, and most importantly gave them time together as a family before their oldest daughter left for college.
And while this memoir is incredibly inspiring, and the Ortons did certainly gain a lot from sailing with their family for a year, the takeaway of Seven at Sea is not that all of us should quit our jobs and buy sailboats. The book serves as an encouraging reminder that our lives can be what we make them regardless of what society dictates. Many of us, especially parents, tend to fell stuck in our circumstances. The Ortons show us that on a large or small scale, we can imagine more boldly than we usually allow for and dare to dream of a life that doesn’t look anything like the one we have now – and still manage to be great parents, spouses, and members of society.
I am generally not taken with memoirs as they never capture my attention, but this was so good! I was captivated and enthralled from the get go. The narration was told in both Erik and Emily’s point of view. That added a fun and interesting appeal to this novel.
One thing I loved while reading was how the highs and the lows of taking such a risk like this were included. Erik and Emily keep it authentic, unique, and honest. It was really well-written and has as much adventure as an action novel! The one thing worth noting that I had a problem with, was that it was a slow read. It took a bit more time and motivation to read, but this adventure story made up for it. Emily’s insight helped round out Erik’s insight. She was the glue that held everything together, while Erik was the lumber. This memoir tells a story of risks and going the road less traveled by. Seven at Sea teaches the reader that the journey is the destination and that relationships are the most important things we have, that we should always strive to strengthen and refine them.
Most people can’t take the risk of just up and leaving their current situation like Erik and Emily did with their five children. Seven at Sea reminds us that our lives are what we make of them and that we should all have the courage to seek our dream lives whatever they may be.
Gareth von Kallenbach (980 KP) rated Divergent (2014) in Movies
Aug 6, 2019
One Choice, decided your friends. One Choice, defines your beliefs. One Choice, determines your loyalties – Forever. ONCE CHOICE CAN TRANSFORM YOU”
Beatrice Prior lives in a futuristic version of Chicago wherein it is divided into five different distinct factions. Each faction is dedicated to following one single virtue. The first faction is Abnegation, known as the “stiffs” of the community. It was formed by those who blame selfishness for human nature’s errors; thereby eliminating anything that can be seen as being selfish. Dauntless was formed by those who blamed cowardice for society’s problems; thereby finding bravery by facing ones fears. Erudite- the “brains” of the operation. Run by those who blamed human ignorance for the faults of society. They formed Erudite as a way of eliminating ignorance and darkness from human minds. Amity- the “flower children” who dislike war, was formed in order to keep a peaceful society that would be free from conflict and sadness caused by wars and instigation. Candor- a faction formed by those who blame duplicity and deception, who believe that dishonesty is the key fault in human nature which began evil and war. There are also those who do not fit into any of the factions. Those people are called The Factionless and are people who are poor and live on the streets. There are few who possess the traits of all five factions. They are called The Divergent. Being a Divergent is considered extremely dangerous because their minds can not be controlled.
The only way to find out which faction one belongs to is by taking an aptitude test. It’s not until the ceremony that a person chooses to join a faction according to the test results. Beatrice doesn’t have the luxury of knowing which faction she belongs to because her test results came back as inconclusive meaning she is in fact a Divergent. She chooses to leave her mother and father behind in Abnegation and decides to join Dauntless while her brother is placed into Erudite. The family is torn apart without knowing her secret of being a Divergent. After she arrives into Dauntless she is forced to be brave by overcoming obstacles, finding love and making friends while finding herself in a war that tries to overthrow the government.
I was pleasantly surprised with how much action this film has. Without reading the books prior to screening the film, it is hard to say if the film follows closely to the book Honestly I did not have high hopes for the film and I’m not sure why other than its story being somewhat similar to The Hunger Games in all of its dystopian glory. I am glad to report that though the two stories are alike they are unique in their own way. One is not better than the other, they are just different and should not be misconstrued as being the same type of story. The acting is exceptional! The actors are perfect at portraying their characters. After being sucked in from beginning to end it not only left me wanting more but it left me wanting to know the characters more. I am left with wanting to read the series of books that much more!
“I feel like someone breathed new air into my lungs. I am not Abnegation. I am not Dauntless.
I am Divergent.”
Beatrice Prior lives in a futuristic version of Chicago wherein it is divided into five different distinct factions. Each faction is dedicated to following one single virtue. The first faction is Abnegation, known as the “stiffs” of the community. It was formed by those who blame selfishness for human nature’s errors; thereby eliminating anything that can be seen as being selfish. Dauntless was formed by those who blamed cowardice for society’s problems; thereby finding bravery by facing ones fears. Erudite- the “brains” of the operation. Run by those who blamed human ignorance for the faults of society. They formed Erudite as a way of eliminating ignorance and darkness from human minds. Amity- the “flower children” who dislike war, was formed in order to keep a peaceful society that would be free from conflict and sadness caused by wars and instigation. Candor- a faction formed by those who blame duplicity and deception, who believe that dishonesty is the key fault in human nature which began evil and war. There are also those who do not fit into any of the factions. Those people are called The Factionless and are people who are poor and live on the streets. There are few who possess the traits of all five factions. They are called The Divergent. Being a Divergent is considered extremely dangerous because their minds can not be controlled.
The only way to find out which faction one belongs to is by taking an aptitude test. It’s not until the ceremony that a person chooses to join a faction according to the test results. Beatrice doesn’t have the luxury of knowing which faction she belongs to because her test results came back as inconclusive meaning she is in fact a Divergent. She chooses to leave her mother and father behind in Abnegation and decides to join Dauntless while her brother is placed into Erudite. The family is torn apart without knowing her secret of being a Divergent. After she arrives into Dauntless she is forced to be brave by overcoming obstacles, finding love and making friends while finding herself in a war that tries to overthrow the government.
I was pleasantly surprised with how much action this film has. Without reading the books prior to screening the film, it is hard to say if the film follows closely to the book Honestly I did not have high hopes for the film and I’m not sure why other than its story being somewhat similar to The Hunger Games in all of its dystopian glory. I am glad to report that though the two stories are alike they are unique in their own way. One is not better than the other, they are just different and should not be misconstrued as being the same type of story. The acting is exceptional! The actors are perfect at portraying their characters. After being sucked in from beginning to end it not only left me wanting more but it left me wanting to know the characters more. I am left with wanting to read the series of books that much more!
“I feel like someone breathed new air into my lungs. I am not Abnegation. I am not Dauntless.
I am Divergent.”
Debbiereadsbook (1303 KP) rated Alpha's Embrace (Omega Misfits #3) in Books
Apr 19, 2020
a needed addition but falls far flat of the other two books
Independent reviewer for Gay Romance Reviews, I was gifted my copy of this book.
This is book 3 in the Omega Misfits series, but you don't need to have read Trust No Alpha (book 1) or The Alpha's Fake Mate (book 2) before you read this one. They all take place in the same world, but can totally be read as a stand alone read. I HAVE read them, although I did not write reviews for them as I read them via the Unlimited programme.
And I found THIS one the weakest of the three.
Alphas are supposed to mate with Omegas and ONLY with Omegas. However when 2 Omegas mate, and produce a child, that child is a Sylph. Sylph children are removed from society and kept locked up for their own good. They live with a constant Burn, unlike Alphas who get them regularly, and most do not live into adulthood for going insane.
Misha is such a child. Well, not a child, he is well into adulthood and a bit of an anomoly. He can control his Burn, and be a productive member of society, BUT for the fact he is Sylph. Geo is an Alpha and the new general manager at the facility where Misha lives. When Geo touches Misha without gloves, a bond begins. A bond that is as illegal as it is dangerous. To BOTH of them.
Both Misha and Geo know this is different, whatever they are feeling, but Geo is best able to voice it and rationalise what is happening between them. Misha is, for want of a better explanation, away with the fairies most of the time, but then again, being locked up all the time would make anyone so. Misha KNOWS he is Sylph, he KNOWS he cannot bond, so he doesn't know what this is between him and Geo. He KNOWS he wants Geo, in a way that is different to his usual want (Sylphs want everyone) he just doesn't know what to do. Geo makes the decision, but Misha is given a choice. I liked that it took time for them to act on the bond, to consummate it. They both have thoughts about the other, it just takes time for them to act on it. I've filed it as m-preg, cos it is talked about and does appear in other books in the series, but there isn't any here.
Both guys have a say, in the first person. Misha's voice is a little airy-fairy, like I said and Geo's is very much an Alpha, but he does go a little off the rails, and that comes out of nowhere, to be honest. I found Geo the least liked of the three Alphas in these books and I cannot pinpoint exactly why.
I liked how it all sorted out, but I would have liked a bit of an epilogue, a some-time-later type thing, to catch up on them, and how things pan out after what they did, and whether things had changed for Misha with a fully formed bond.
A nice read, a GOOD addition to the series though and I think it really was needed, a story about the Slyph children, who are talked about in the other books. This book just didn't push my buttons as the other two did, I'm afraid.
3 good solid stars
**same worded review will appear elsewhere**
This is book 3 in the Omega Misfits series, but you don't need to have read Trust No Alpha (book 1) or The Alpha's Fake Mate (book 2) before you read this one. They all take place in the same world, but can totally be read as a stand alone read. I HAVE read them, although I did not write reviews for them as I read them via the Unlimited programme.
And I found THIS one the weakest of the three.
Alphas are supposed to mate with Omegas and ONLY with Omegas. However when 2 Omegas mate, and produce a child, that child is a Sylph. Sylph children are removed from society and kept locked up for their own good. They live with a constant Burn, unlike Alphas who get them regularly, and most do not live into adulthood for going insane.
Misha is such a child. Well, not a child, he is well into adulthood and a bit of an anomoly. He can control his Burn, and be a productive member of society, BUT for the fact he is Sylph. Geo is an Alpha and the new general manager at the facility where Misha lives. When Geo touches Misha without gloves, a bond begins. A bond that is as illegal as it is dangerous. To BOTH of them.
Both Misha and Geo know this is different, whatever they are feeling, but Geo is best able to voice it and rationalise what is happening between them. Misha is, for want of a better explanation, away with the fairies most of the time, but then again, being locked up all the time would make anyone so. Misha KNOWS he is Sylph, he KNOWS he cannot bond, so he doesn't know what this is between him and Geo. He KNOWS he wants Geo, in a way that is different to his usual want (Sylphs want everyone) he just doesn't know what to do. Geo makes the decision, but Misha is given a choice. I liked that it took time for them to act on the bond, to consummate it. They both have thoughts about the other, it just takes time for them to act on it. I've filed it as m-preg, cos it is talked about and does appear in other books in the series, but there isn't any here.
Both guys have a say, in the first person. Misha's voice is a little airy-fairy, like I said and Geo's is very much an Alpha, but he does go a little off the rails, and that comes out of nowhere, to be honest. I found Geo the least liked of the three Alphas in these books and I cannot pinpoint exactly why.
I liked how it all sorted out, but I would have liked a bit of an epilogue, a some-time-later type thing, to catch up on them, and how things pan out after what they did, and whether things had changed for Misha with a fully formed bond.
A nice read, a GOOD addition to the series though and I think it really was needed, a story about the Slyph children, who are talked about in the other books. This book just didn't push my buttons as the other two did, I'm afraid.
3 good solid stars
**same worded review will appear elsewhere**
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Breaking Up is Hard to Do: Britain and Europe's Dysfunctional Relationship
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Natacha (374 KP) rated Scythe (Arc of a Scythe #1) in Books
Sep 7, 2019
Unfortunately, it looks like I have an unpopular opinion once more and I'm so sad about it. The hype for the book is big and the concept of it made me really want to read it and I was sure I'll like it. But alas...
Things I like:
-The main idea of the book sounded very unique and interesting. A future society where humanity had overcome death and all diseases and the only way to keep the population to a normal number is having a group of people how must obey to a certain set of rule, randomly killing other members of the society. Such a nice concept and so many topics that you could dive in.
-There were a couple of nice twists.
-Scyth Curie was an interesting character with a nice backstory.
-Volta. He is a side character and yet, he was one of the most interesting ones.
Things I didn't like
-Everything came down to execution. As I mentioned the concept was unique but yet we get very little world-building and very little description in general. And this is coming for someone that despises lengthy descriptions. By the end of the book the only thing that I knew is that people don't die, they have a way to become young again but there is nothing left for them to do and they are bored. That's a missed opportunity to elaborate and dive into what would actually people do in these circumstances.
-Because we don't get enough information and rules in this world I was left with questions and also instances that looked like plot holes.
-The main characters. Throughout the book, we are constantly being told what characters are feeling, never shown through their actions, which made it very difficult for me to connect with them and believe what I was told they felt. An example was during Rowan training where he had to perform some actions and the only thing we got was "I don't like this" but this was never followed with actions to show us that he didn't like what he needed to do.
-It's hinted in the book that Rowan slowly turns into a bad person that is enjoying killing, but again this is never back with his action and I never felt that this was what was happening to him.
-The love story. So I've seen many people saying that there was instant love and unfortunately I agree. The two main characters fall in love within 3 months which I would argue that that makes it not instant love but, because once again we brush over everything we go to "I don't like you" to "I'm in love with you" without been shown how this happened. Yes, they are supposed to spend 3 months training together but if you don't show me how they slowly bonded and fall in love I'll never believe it. And this what happened to me.
-The climax. The book build-up to the final moment where one of the main characters will have to kill the other. This moment is in the last 5 pages off the book and once again just gets brush over the events and makes it looks too easy.
To sum up this could have been an amazing story but unfortunately, I felt like it was rushed and not well executed.
Things I like:
-The main idea of the book sounded very unique and interesting. A future society where humanity had overcome death and all diseases and the only way to keep the population to a normal number is having a group of people how must obey to a certain set of rule, randomly killing other members of the society. Such a nice concept and so many topics that you could dive in.
-There were a couple of nice twists.
-Scyth Curie was an interesting character with a nice backstory.
-Volta. He is a side character and yet, he was one of the most interesting ones.
Things I didn't like
-Everything came down to execution. As I mentioned the concept was unique but yet we get very little world-building and very little description in general. And this is coming for someone that despises lengthy descriptions. By the end of the book the only thing that I knew is that people don't die, they have a way to become young again but there is nothing left for them to do and they are bored. That's a missed opportunity to elaborate and dive into what would actually people do in these circumstances.
-Because we don't get enough information and rules in this world I was left with questions and also instances that looked like plot holes.
-The main characters. Throughout the book, we are constantly being told what characters are feeling, never shown through their actions, which made it very difficult for me to connect with them and believe what I was told they felt. An example was during Rowan training where he had to perform some actions and the only thing we got was "I don't like this" but this was never followed with actions to show us that he didn't like what he needed to do.
-It's hinted in the book that Rowan slowly turns into a bad person that is enjoying killing, but again this is never back with his action and I never felt that this was what was happening to him.
-The love story. So I've seen many people saying that there was instant love and unfortunately I agree. The two main characters fall in love within 3 months which I would argue that that makes it not instant love but, because once again we brush over everything we go to "I don't like you" to "I'm in love with you" without been shown how this happened. Yes, they are supposed to spend 3 months training together but if you don't show me how they slowly bonded and fall in love I'll never believe it. And this what happened to me.
-The climax. The book build-up to the final moment where one of the main characters will have to kill the other. This moment is in the last 5 pages off the book and once again just gets brush over the events and makes it looks too easy.
To sum up this could have been an amazing story but unfortunately, I felt like it was rushed and not well executed.
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