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Ted 2 (2015)
Ted 2 (2015)
2015 | Comedy
The bear is back
The success of Ted was completely unexpected. I doubt even director Seth McFarlane knew just how popular it would go on to become.

From special DVD’s to limited edition cuddly (or not so cuddly) toys, Ted has become something of a phenomenon. A sequel was always going to be on the cards and after three years perfecting it, McFarlane returns with Ted 2. But is it as funny as its predecessor?

Ted 2 follows the titular bear as he embarks on a relationship with Tami-Lynn and continues his friendship with John, the ever-watchable Mark Wahlberg in another great performance.

Unfortunately for Ted, his rights have been challenged by the US government and he must fight to be recognised as a ‘person’, rather than just someone’s ‘property’.

What ensues is a film which whilst being as funny as its predecessor, manages to be somewhat disappointing with a serious shortage of plot. This becomes evident as McFarlane uses Family Guy-esque cut-scenes and incredibly long dance numbers.

The cast, on the whole, is fantastic. Amanda Seyfried takes over from Mila Kunis as John’s love interest and Ted’s lawyer, Samantha. As usual she is a joy to watch but her inexperience in the offensive comedy genre is evident – scenes of her taking drugs just don’t sit right.

Morgan Freeman is sorely underused as a civil rights attorney, though a quick reference to his silky-smooth voice is more than welcome. Giovanni Ribisi also makes a surprising return as Ted’s nemesis Donny.

An absolutely brilliant cameo from Liam Neeson is one of the highlights in a film packed with gags which generally hit the spot – but they’re certainly not for the feint-hearted.

Ted 2 is louder, more obnoxious and much more offensive than its predecessor with numerous scenes involving sperm banks and an endless supply of drug-related comedy.

Unfortunately, all these highs are brought crashing back down to Earth as the story continuously runs out of steam and picks up again. It’s such a shame that a film less than two hours long has such a plot problem.

Thankfully, the original Ted wasn’t a masterpiece and MacFarlane manages to shoot the film well with a real eye for the finer details. His love of movies is apparent with Star Wars references being used well.

Overall, Ted 2 is very close to the standard of its predecessor, despite the excess story-padding that occurs throughout the film. The comedic elements are cracking with Liam Neeson’s cameo being a laugh-out-loud moment – it’s worth a watch, but only if you’re a fan of the first.

https://moviemetropolis.net/2015/07/12/the-bear-is-back-ted-2-review/
  
Obessed #2: Meik & Sebastian
Obessed #2: Meik & Sebastian
Quin Perin | 2018 | Erotica, LGBTQ+, Romance
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
awesome follow up!
Independent reviewer for Archaeolibrarian, I was gifted my copy of this book direct from the authors.

This is part two of Meik and Sebastian's story, and you MUST read part one first. MUST!! And I strongly recommend you wait til you have all four parts in your possession, cos you will hate having to wait for the next one! I am!!

Again, this is so bloody short! 99 pages, poof, gone, just like that!

Meik is still obsessed with Sebastian, so much so, that he pulls Sebastian off the streets and into his home, to be HIS. But having Sebastian in his home is bringing up memories, long buried memories and Meik doesn't know how to deal with those memories, so he does what he does best, lashes out.

Something is wrong with Meik, he reckons he is sick. It's the only way he can explain his total and utter obsession with Sebastian! Personally, I think the poor man is simply deluded about what's up with him. But Meik, being Meik, he'll get there under his own steam, he's just gonna hurt a few people first.

As soon as Sebastian decides he is staying at Meik's, Meik goes all out to make him HIS, to mark him, inside and out. And oooeeee! Do these boys get up to some serious marking!

Meik's memories are surfacing though, and we don't get all of the whole story and they come at you out of order and out of left field. But you know, you just KNOW when it all comes out, and it does HAVE to come out, and we get the whole sorry story, its gonna be painful, it really is. He is unraveling, quickly, and I don't know where this is going, but its going really fast and you gotta keep up!

It is again only told from Meik's point of view. I knew that going in, but I STILL wanted to hear from Sebastian! It doesn't affect my star rating, this time, because I knew. But I'm just greedy with my books, and I ALWAYS want more.

How long do I have to wait for part three?? I dunno, I'm gonna be waiting, waiting, waiting, WAITING!

Oh just gimme already, okay?? I can't wait!

So, even though its so bloody short, and even though only Meik has his say, and because I can see some of his memories playing out and I don;t want them to play out the way I see it, but I really do (and if THAT makes any sense to you, you is good!) and BECAUSE it's such a cliff hanger...

5 full stars

**same worded review will appear elsewhere**
  
Surreal Estate
Surreal Estate
Jesi Lea Ryan | 2018 | LGBTQ+, Paranormal, Romance
10
10.0 (3 Ratings)
Book Rating
love love LOVED this one!
Sasha can't live at home, so he's on the streets. He finds an empty home that calls to his 6th sense and moves in. Then Nick buys the house. The house reacts badly to Nick wanting to sell it, and makes Nick's already tight budget and time frame almost impossible. Sasha doesn't want Nick to end up in the hospital, or worse, so he has to come up with something quick, while clearly out and healing his grandfather's house.

I won a copy of this book, and I am so bloody glad I did! Ms Ryan usually writes Young Adult and had this book came with that tag, I would not have entered, cos I'm not a YA fan. This is Ms Ryan's first foray into a much more adult setting, and into the male/male genre, and BOY does she smash it out the park!

Sasha can read houses, they call to him. His skill isn't made immediately clear, and we have to wait for the full picture. I think it really hit me, just what this meant for Sasha, when he was healing his grandfather's house.

I loved we got all of Nick's internal wrangling with himself over his growing feelings and attraction to Sasha. Loved that he was like, "okay then, must be bi" Loved the interaction between Nick and his brothers! His older brother needs a story now, needs to find his happy ever after, especially after what happened here. Well both brothers should have a story, I think!

It's not overly explicit, I thought, but it wans't lacking in any thing regards to the heat and steam level between these two! Not at all! It does carry a violence and drug use warning. These ARE needed and are an integral part of the story, but they are all off screen. We know Sasha's mum does drugs, but we don't see it. We know WHAT happened to Nick, cos we deal with the fall out, but not HOW. It also comes with a non-con warning. It's mostly touching, and doesn't develop into a full blown attack, but could very well have. It needs mentioning though.

It's told from both Sasha and Nick's point of view, in the first person. Each change occurs as a a chapter changes and is clearly headed. I didn't quite manage to read it in one sitting, but very nearly!

I can't wait to see what Ms Ryan comes up with next. I love finding new to me authors, especially ones who step outside their comfort zone! She impressed me here, greatly, and, apparently, I'm a tough critic! I'm not sure that's true, but I LOVED this book.

so,

5 full and shiny stars!

**same worded review will appear elsewhere**
  
Fifty Shades Freed (2018)
Fifty Shades Freed (2018)
2018 | Drama
The third and final entry in the “Fifty Shades” series has arrived with the release of “fifty Shades Freed”. The story opens with the wedding of Anastasia (Dakota Johnson), and Christian (Jamie Dornan), and follows their honeymoon in the lavish locales of France.

There getaway is cut short by an act of sabotage at Christian’s company and it soon becomes clear that a person from their past has taken things to a dangerous level which requires Christian to implement security measures for Anastasia and their extended family.

In between the intrigue presented by the threat, we also have numerous scenes of nudity and eroticism as Christian is not going to give up his dominating needs anytime soon.

Combine this with a new revelation that threatens to disrupt the crafted and controlled world he has created for himself and Anastasia; the tensions rise between them making a dangerous and stress-filled situation even more complicated.

While the film does have a better plot and is more engaging than the previous films in the series it is hampered by many of the same issues that hindered the series. The two leads have zero chemistry with one another and their supposedly highly erotic scenes are so routine and by the numbers they lack any form of excitement or real titillation. The film also has this message that behavior that would be considered highly unacceptable in others seems to get a pass for Christian as he is a handsome billionaire. He is a very selfish and controlling individual who demands obedience. While Anastasia does have a strong enough character to stand up to him, she tolerates behavior that would be considered unacceptable by many and seems very quick to give him a pass when lavish gifts and trips are bestowed upon her. I wonder how romantic and acceptable his behavior would be if he was a struggling musician who did not have the financial resources to create fantasies and buy his apologies. I know the film is supposed to be romantic fantasy but this really annoys me as he exhibits much of the behavior that is considered unacceptable and to be avoided at all costs, yet it is all wrapped up in a sweet bow of forgiveness.

That aside the series does seem to be losing steam as the last film earned less than the original film and “Fifty Shades Freed” is tracking to open well below the last film as well. Fans of the series will likely enjoy it as a satisfying finale, but I really expected more from the final moments of the series as after following the characters, the ending seemed very anti-climactic.

http://sknr.net/2018/02/08/fifty-shades-freed/
  
Big Fish (2003)
Big Fish (2003)
2003 | Comedy, Drama
Whimsical, Fantastical and Entrancing
Looking for a charming, fantastical diversion that will whisk you away from this world for 2 hours? Look no further than the heartwarming father/son story BIG FISH.

Set in the unmistakable stylings of idealic living from the mind of Tim Burton, BIG FISH tells the tale of a father by the name of Ed Bloom (the great Albert Finney) who's son, Will Bloom (Billy Crudup - fresh off of ALMOST FAMOUS) has separated himself from his father for he is sick of the "tall tales" that his father tells about his life. Most of the movie is the reconciliation of father and son set against the backdrop of these fantastical stories (the younger Ed Bloom is played with whimsical wonder by Ewan McGregor).

And...it is the telling of these stories where Director Tim Burton really shines. It is a perfect match of Director, tone and style to tell the story. He uses a primary color palate (much the same way he used it in Edward Scissorhands) punctuated by "steam punk blacks and grays" that creates a world that is a wonder to look at and is instantly recognizable not only by what is familiar but also by how it is UN-familiar. If overused, this type of stylings could be a detriment to the storytelling, but in BIG FISH, Burton paints the canvas perfectly.

As I stated, McGregor is whimsical as the young Ed Bloom. You can see a young man exploring and drinking in all the world has to offer. On the other side, Albert Finney shows that he has a twinkle in his eye (even though the older Ed Bloom is battling a chronic disease). He sparkles when he tells his stories. Finney's performance draws you in while McGregor's keeps you there.

As does the performances of such terrific actors like Steve Buscemi, Helena Bonham Carter and Danny DeVito (as individuals that Ed meets along the way). They "get" what Burton is going for and embrace the charm and whimsy of it all. "Back in the real world" - a (then) unknown Marion Cotillard is engaging as Will Bloom's pregnant wife and Jessica Lange shines as Ed's wife who has "heard it all" and is still charmed by it all after all these years. There is a scene later in the film between Finney and Lange (and a bathtub) that shows that these 2 veteran actors can throw their fastball when asked.

I was entranced by the tall tales told in this film and I think you will be to.

Letter Grade: A-

8 stars (out of 10) and you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis)
  
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The Revenant (2015)
The Revenant (2015)
2015 | Adventure, Drama, Thriller
Typical Oscar Fodder
There are two types of film critic when it comes to the Academy Awards. Those who enjoy the glamour that the Oscars bring every spring and those who despise what the awards mean for film. I’m in the latter camp, I find them out of touch with what movie-watching audiences enjoy and feel an overhaul is necessary to reflect that.

That’s not to say the Oscars reward bad films of course. Not at all. I do feel however that they, on the whole, reward technical brilliance, rather than the deeper aspects of movie-making and forget to include mass-market crowd-pleasers for fear of cheapening the ceremony.

The film everyone is talking about this year is The Revenant. With an incredible 12 nominations, it’s the one to watch in 2016. But is it actually any good?

With Birdman director Alejandro G. Iñárritu at the helm, it promises more of the exceptional performances and technical perfection he brought to that film, and that’s exactly what you get.

Leonardo DiCaprio, nominated for yet another Academy Award, stars as Hugh Glass, a hunter left for dead by his supposed comrades after a vicious bear attack leaves him gravely injured. He is supported by man-of-the-moment Tom Hardy, nominated for a Best Supporting Actor award, and British rising star Will Poulter (The Maze Runner).

DiCaprio’s Glass is a commanding presence throughout The Revenant as he tracks down those who betrayed him. With little English dialogue, it’s impressive that he is able to convey such emotion, but he does so perfectly. He’s certainly worthy of his Oscar nod, but whether or not he will be fifth time lucky remains to be seen.

Elsewhere, the cinematography that Iñárritu uses is nothing short of breath-taking. Beautiful lingering shots of snow-capped mountains, icy waterfalls and baron forests all make for a documentary-level of awe and it’s here where the film succeeds the most.

Unfortunately, the rest of The Revenant falls a little flat. The story is incredibly pedestrian considering the film’s 156 minute running time and whilst the cast are all excellent, the material is a little staid ranging from the ordinary, to the bizarre. One scene in particular had me remembering The Empire Strikes Back of all films.

The intriguing plot that Iñárritu brought to Birdman is nowhere to be seen here and as the film reaches its mightily predictable conclusion, it runs out of steam. There’s only so much landscape, however beautiful, that you can throw at an audience.

Overall, The Revenant is a technical masterpiece, flanked by impressive performances from Leonardo DiCaprio and Will Poulter in particular, but the story just isn’t there. It may have a dozen award nominations to its name, but in this case, it’s nothing more than style over substance.

https://moviemetropolis.net/2016/01/17/typical-oscar-fodder-the-revenant-review/
  
X-Men: Apocalypse (2016)
X-Men: Apocalypse (2016)
2016 | Action, Sci-Fi
Full disclosure, I grew up a huge X-Men fan. As a kid it was one of the few comics that I would try read as often as I could. I would borrow my friends books, convince my mom to buy me an issue every chance I got and like so many growing up in the early 90s, never miss a Saturday morning episode of the fantastic X-Men cartoon.

As such, I have been waiting for the films to capture the X-Men team dynamic while creating interesting fleshed out characters for the mass audiences to appreciate. I felt the franchise was headed in that direction with the last two films, X-Men: First class and X-Men: Days of Futures Past. Unfortunately, X-Men: Apocalypse takes a bit of a stumble in this department when it tries to introduce several fan favorite characters to this X-Men Universe. However it sacrifices solid character development in order to introduce them all in this one story. That’s not to say that this decision makes a bad film, it’s just that the characters are somewhat hollow and we never really connect with any of them. Not even the older characters who we already know. In the 2016 landscape of superhero/comic movies, when you have too many hollow characters the film often feels like we are just going through the motions of fan service, rather than telling a good story though film. This shallow character development makes me wish that instead of making more X-Men movies, Fox would team up with Netflix and produce an episodic series that can really dig down into the story of these characters and the missions they go on to help all of humanity…sigh…one can hope.

As for the rest of this film, it is safe to say that it is a fun popcorn adventure just in time for the summer blockbuster season. The first act suffers from a bit of pacing issues, but once the film starts to pick up steam, it becomes a full action packed adventure filled with all the mutant powers you would expect from an X-Men film. We receive excellent performances we have come to expect from James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence and the rest of the standard cast. As far as the new characters added to this film, Sophie Turner (Game of Thrones) is the stand out as Jean Gery. She delivers one of the few nuanced performances of the whole film and I look forward to her continuing to build on the roll in future X-Men films.
X-Men: Apocalypse is more of what you would expect from the X-Men series. Not terrible but not all that great either. Fans will be exited and enjoy this entry to the series while casual viewers will enjoy the blockbuster elements.