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Pan (2015)
Pan (2015)
2015 | Action, Sci-Fi
I had mixed emotions when I first saw the trailer for Pan. The story of Peter Pan was one of my all time favorites growing up. Then Steven Spielberg had to go and get Robin Williams and Dustin Hoffman together to bring us Hook, and it solidified the stories of Pan as the best thing since sliced bread for me. So here we have Joe Wright bringing the word put on paper by Jason Fuchs to real life. The story of how Peter came to Neverland; and just how did Captain James T. Hook become so fearful of crocodiles. I was worried, and so I shut it all out. I did not watch any more trailers, clips, or synopsis on the film. But, my curiosity got the best of me, and when we offered the press screening, I jumped at the opportunity to see it. And boy, I am glad I did.

 

Pan, in case you haven’t figured it out, tells the story of 12-year old orphan Peter (Levi Miller), who is abducted from his orphanage, along with many other little boy orphans, by pirates from Neverland. When they bring Peter to Neverland, he is forced to work in the mines, serving the evil pirate overlord, Black Beard (Hugh Jackman, no seriously. It totally doesn’t even look like him.). It’s not long before some very unusual things start happening to him, and he, along with James T. Hook (Garrett Hedlund), escape the mines to find the natives and Princess Tiger Lily (Rooney Mara), who helps Peter discover his destiny.

 

Loaded with stunning visuals and a great soundtrack (including some very recognizable songs in the form of pirate chants), Pan nails it in all the right ways. The visionaries who brought this world to life are amazing, and the creativity in every scene is astounding. It was especially charming that the people behind the film kept in mind that it is a family film. While there is some violence, it is an action movie after all, they applied some very interesting effects and theories to use in place of the gore and blood. I also enjoyed, as weird as this sounds, the brightness of the whole movie. They didn’t try to make the film a dark tale of gritty origins. The feel of the story has the same notes of brightness that I remember from the Disney film as a kid, to even Hook in my later years.

 

And the likenesses do not stop there. It was very fun, and a bit nostalgic, to catch the references and clues of what’s to come. You see things that influence the characters to become who we know and love. And true to the rumors/stories I heard of the background of the beloved Peter Pan tale, Captain Hook and Peter began their time together as friends. The film sets out to do what it was meant to do… tell the story of how Peter and Captain Hook became who they were. But, not all is revealed in this film. When the film is over, and you’ll wish it weren’t, our beloved hero and villain have a long way to go still. So look forward to more films to come.

 

The only gripe I had with this movie was the acting. And just one part in general. I felt most of the cast was excellent. Jackman portrayed a great, and zany by the standards of the Paniverse (hoping to coin a new term here people, #paniverse), pirate… czar?! I know I used overlord, but it’s hard to say what he is other than he is the captain of captains. Mara played Tiger Lily oh so very well, and Miller held his own right up there with the bigger names. But it was Hedlund I had issue with. His portrayal of James Hook was more reminiscent of Jack Nicholson with elongated words, and an almost creepy like vibe. It’s just not how I imagined him to act, and maybe that is just throwing my perception off. Though, my feeling and view of the portrayal was echoed by my guest at the screening, so there may be something to it. Luckily, my negative view of the acting was not enough to pull me out of the experience, and I was still able to enjoy the movie.

 

Bottom line. Go see this movie. Take your kids, your partners, your parents, your grandparents, your cousin’s, aunt’s son/daughter… oh wait. That’s you. The point is. It’s definitely worth seeing. The 3D effects were nothing ground breaking, but it would still be worth it to see it in 3D. And this will definitely be in my collection on day 1 of home release.
  
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Charlie Cobra Reviews (1840 KP) rated I Am a Hero (2015) in Movies

Jul 7, 2020 (Updated Oct 29, 2020)  
I Am a Hero (2015)
I Am a Hero (2015)
2015 | Action, Horror
8
7.7 (3 Ratings)
Movie Rating
The Hero's Journey In The Zombie Apocalypse Is As Serious As It Is Funny
Contains spoilers, click to show
I have to say that this movie is one of the best zombie movies I've seen lately. From the beginning I like the way that the main character Hideo has these little moments where he zones out and has these little fantasies where he imagines himself as being more outgoing or heroic. Even if its just something small like the first one where he's at work and get's everyone cheering about being proud to work there when in reality he was just muttering to himself quietly. I really like how he's this kind of everyday regular guy who's just kind of down on his luck doubting himself. He's not where he thought he would be career wise which is hindering his relationship with his girlfriend and his co-workers. His girlfriend even kicks him out because of this and throws out some of his stuff. He really has bad luck because as he tries to make up for the fight with his girlfriend Tekko, he goes back to the apartment to find out that she has been infected by the ZQN virus and she attacks him and nearly infects him too. The ZQN's were pretty cool by the way. At first I thought that the whole cross-eyed look to them looked a little too silly but as it became a signature visualization that marked when someone had become a zombie. When his girlfriend turned it was quite horrifying as she contorted all over the place and did everything in her power to try and eat him. She even bit the door so violently she broke off all of her teeth, which was quite lucky for Hideo because when she bit him she didn't break the skin infecting him. The scene when he is running through the city and everything is in chaos was one of the more memorable scenes for me because so much was going on. There were ZQN's and regular people running all over the place in all directions and cars hitting people, but the car scene with the business man, the school girl Hiromi, and the taxi driver was spectacular. In fact one of the coolest things I've seen in a zombie movie is the school girl Hiromi who becomes a abnormal ZQN. She says that she was bit by a baby who was probably infected from breast milk if the mother was a ZQN. She didn't exhibit any symptoms for like 2 days and when she turns she doesn't attack Hideo but instead saves him by killing a ZQN that was trying to kill him. She has one eye that looks like a ZQN and has crazy superhuman strength but for some reason sleeps a lot. Most of the time in these survival zombie movies the story suffers from a lack of plot structure but a news report stating that the virus can't sustain itself at higher elevations make traveling to Mt. Fuji a destination propelling the plot further in a direction that makes sense. I also like how they used foreshadowing in certain scenes like when he finds a shopping basket with a logo of a marketplace, you can tell that place is more than likely the next destination. I also thought it was pretty cool how Hiromi wasn't the only abnormal and there was a weird "grudge" spider walking girl and then the infamous track star zombie with the crushed head. That one ran super fast and jumped really high and was pretty cool. One of the things I kind of didn't like was that Hideo had a gun for a lot of the movie but never even shot it until close to the end but it did go with the characters personality and make the story more interesting. It's just a little hard to believe. Also why weren't there anybody using any samurais swords on the zombies. I mean with the ZQN's being hard to kill because you need to destroy the whole brain, cutting their heads off would have been really efficient and machetes or swords would have been perfect. And just because it's Japan, I don't expect there to be swords everywhere but I'm surprised there wasn't even one. This movie was just so unexpectedly good it's hard for me to nitpick at things with it and I'm sure there's more that bothered me with it but I really enjoyed and liked this movie. I give this movie a 8/10 and my "Must See Seal of Approval"


  
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Johnny Marr recommended track Jeepster by T Rex in Electric Boogie 1971 by T Rex in Music (curated)

 
Electric Boogie 1971 by T Rex
Electric Boogie 1971 by T Rex
2007 | Rock
(0 Ratings)
Album Favorite

Jeepster by T Rex

(0 Ratings)

Track

"This song was a really pivotal moment in my life, it was the first record I ever bought and it was by a complete fluke. ‘Jeepster’ was in a bargain box for 10p and it happened to have a photograph of Marc Bolan and Mickey Finn on the label, that was unusual, it was rare to have a photograph on the label and Marc Bolan looked androgynous, very beautiful, mysterious and quite weird. “So at the age of ten I took a punt on this thing. With that money I could have bought a few comics and an ice lolly, I’d have taken the stick and put it in the wheel of my bike, which was very important! But I bought ‘Jeepster’ instead and I did that thing of walking home and looking and looking at it. Fifteen minutes later I put in on and it snagged my attention straightaway, I had to pay attention to it, but it was pop music. “I listen to it now and it’s quite lo-fi, but even then I had an awareness it sounded like people in a room and that it was pretty rough, which was a bit of an ask for a little kid, it certainly wasn’t music for 10 year olds, 15 year olds maybe. I heard the sound of his guitar and why the hell I was hearing bongos in there as well was really intriguing to me. Before it was three quarters of the way through I was planning on playing it again and trying to find out how this thing worked. “The riff is funky without being James Brown and his limitations as a guitar player were really useful on all of his records up until ‘20th Century Boy’, which was very brutal. ‘Jeepster’ is very funky but he’s almost playing with the same limitations of John Lee Hooker, if he was any better - a Ritchie Blackmore or an Eric Clapton - it wouldn’t have been nearly as interesting because it would have sounded too bland, accomplished and slick. He’s hanging in there a bit, particularly on the outro, the riff is so dumb a more accomplished guitar player wouldn’t have been heard dead playing it. It’s so gauche, but it’s probably the best bit of music on the record. “Then there’s the way the band go in and out of time. I picked that up the third time I listened to it and that was really amazing, because on the radio at the time it was The Osmond’s ‘Love Me for a Reason’, The Carpenters, Andy Williams and all this slick, easy listening stuff, but this was a real pre-Glam record. “It identified me, I was ‘I know what it is to be a fan of this thing of my own now.’ I’d seen my parents be fans and to this day they’re fans of bands, but because I became a fan of this guy I was getting all these signals - particularly from girls’ magazines - about what it was to be a fan and having posters on my walls. The Smiths were very aware of that dynamic. “I grew up very close to my sister, who was eleven months younger than me and I’m glad that was something that happened for me, because I had a real sense of what she liked. I’d almost been like a twin, what they call an Irish twin with my sister, and it gave me a genuine appreciation of how great it was to be a girl. “It’s a fantastic function of pop culture, that shifting to take in different gender roles both ways, with people like Lady Gaga and Richey Manic. Marc Bolan was beautiful and he sounded really beautiful, the sound of a soft voice singing in a Rock and Roll way over a rock band has never really left me and that’s probably evident on my solo stuff. “Because of the photograph of Marc Bolan on the sleeve, his androgyny and the way he was singing, it was my first independent connection of seeing a different image of masculinity. I was very, very aware of that, because he was obviously wearing make-up and he was very pretty. I was hearing this guy singing in quite an effeminate voice and I owned the record, so I’d better love it. It wasn’t that I was just loving the music, I’d invested in this thing where this guy was like a woman and that was really exciting."

Source
  
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Lee Ronaldo recommended Kollaps by Einsturzende Neubauten in Music (curated)

 
Kollaps by Einsturzende Neubauten
Kollaps by Einsturzende Neubauten
1981 | Rock
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Album Favorite

"At the end of 1980, Glenn Branca had a tour booked so I quit my day job to go on it, so on the one level it was kind of this fulfillment – ‘wow I’m actually going to go on a fucking rock & roll tour, how great is this?’ And I think it was the end of me having day jobs in New York, which was kind of also an amazing thing to think about. The first tour was in the US and it was wrapped up in all this kind of weird stuff. We were on the West Coast when Lennon was shot. He was one of my great early heroes and one of the reasons why I was involved in any of this stuff to begin with, and he gets shot while I’m on my first rock & roll tour. It felt kind of heavy in a certain way. A few months later we went to Europe and when we played Berlin, Neubauten was the opening act and it was their second ever gig. So I got to see them at the very beginning and meet all those guys. Sheet metal music on cymbal stands - they were really just putting it together at that point, their music also progressed really fast in the early period, but this was just an early primitive version of what they were doing. I met all of those guys, Mufti and Blixa and Alexander and Alex and I some German relatives so I had an affinity with Germany to begin with, and we became friends right away, so I’ve known them since the early 80s, when they really started doing their thing it was this parallel rise to what Sonic Youth was doing. We came out of New York, out of the stuff that was coming out of New York and Black Flag and Minutemen the West Coast stuff, but at the same time all this stuff that was going on in England – the Birthday Party, was there at that point and we had met them, and in that same early period Lydia Lunch had taken us to one of the last Birthday Party shows in New York and we met Nick, Rowland (S. Howard), Mick Harvey and all those guys. Shortly after that when Sonic Youth first started coming to England, the Bad Seeds wanted Sonic Youth to be their opening act. Those early Neubauten records were just so impressive in what they were doing because again Blixa comes out of all this Germanic Berthold Brecht art music as well as this extreme stuff, and they took their extremism to welding torches and grinders on stage. It’s all music on a certain level, didn’t John Cage teach us that, or Stockhausen or Varèse? What Neubauten was doing was really coming out of this same climate of ‘we’ve got electric guitars on stage but we’ve also got noise-makers that could tie our music back to futurist music of the 20s’. I think the really dominant thing about all these groups from that period was that these were no longer kids that grew up in middle America that heard rock & roll and put a band together in their garage after high school and just went out and did their thing, these were all people that were arts educated and went to university and were steeped into 20th century art making practice whether it was music, or visual art or experimental theatre. For me I grew up with pop music on the radio in the kitchen of my house every morning before school, there was an AM radio blasting the latest 7” singles, you couldn’t get away from it, but at the same time I got educated in all this other stuff so all these people wanted to combine this stuff, they didn’t want to leave their education behind and pretend they were ruffians in the garage that were uneducated and idiots savants – kind of like the Stooges were a real version of that, although I couldn’t say enough about Iggy and his smartness. When Neubauten was doing that stuff it wasn’t tongue in cheek but it was marshalling a lot of different influences, not just simple pop influences. This is some of the most remarkable music ever, and the shows they put on, they were dangerous in an extreme way with sparks flying off the stage. Sonic Youth played this famous show in the Mojave Desert in 1984, and Neubauten did one in the same series, within 4 or 5 months of our show. We had a lot of early symbiotic relationships with all those groups."

Source
  
Chronicles of Crime
Chronicles of Crime
2018 | Deduction, Entertainment, Murder & Mystery
Find the murderer, the weapon, and the location. That’s Clue/Cluedo right? Yes. Find the priceless artifact that was stolen from the museum while other complications arise is Chronicles of Crime, and specifically the Curse of the Pharaohs case. Do you have what it takes to solve this crime, and more importantly, do you have a cell phone or tablet??


Chronicles of Crime is an app-driven storytelling, deduction, adventure board game that can be played solo or cooperatively. Players will be assuming the mantles of London detectives attempting to solve difficult cases at Scotland Yard. As it is a cooperative game players will win or lose together, but the game itself will be helping players along the way.
To setup, place the Evidence Board on the table and surround it with these components: Location Boards in a stack, but Scotland Yard attached to the bottom of the Evidence Board, Character and Special Items cards in face-down stacks, Evidence Category cards face-up, and the four Forensic Contact cards nearby as well. Open the app, choose the scenario to play, and let the app guide you through the introduction to the game.


As there are no real “turns” Chronicles of Crime allows freedom for players to essentially roam around London’s sectors looking for clues to whatever crime has taken place, interrogating suspects, asking the Forensics Contacts team for support when encountering people or items, and finally attempting the solve the case. I cannot really go into much more detail in word or photo, as I wish to avoid all spoilers, but the app will guide players and assist in gentle nudges along the way. The app will be heavily used as players will need to scan the QR codes on several components in order to interact with them, and scannable components may not always be assigned the same roles in other scenarios. Once players have explored as much as they deem necessary, they may claim the group is ready to connect the dots and win the game. Players win or lose by visiting Scotland Yard to solve the case successfully or otherwise.
Components. All of the physical components included in the box are incredible. The cards feature great artwork, the components are wonderful quality, and everything has unique QR codes to scan in the app. The box insert is cleverly-designed and certainly ready to accept expansion materials. The greatest component, however, is the Chronicles of Crime companion app. This app is simply amazing. It is absolutely necessary for play, but once downloaded it requires no Internet access (unless you decide to download additional materials or scenarios). The app is so well-designed and engaging, and the music is minimal but certainly mood-setting. I can clearly see why using an app is essential here, and allows the team to add more and more content without having to alter the physical components at all. A stroke of genius, in my mind!

All in all I was, and still am, blown away by Chronicles of Crime. The marriage of board game and digital app is something I was leery of at first because I much prefer board games, but this simply works. And works quite well. I love being able to travel to a location, check it out, interrogate any persons of interest there, and try to assemble the story in my mind. I want to play all of the scenarios with different groups of people to see if that will change anything, but currently during COVID it’s a no-go.

Chronicles of Crime may never break into my Top 10 Games of All Time, but I will not be moving it out of my collection ever. Well, unless Lucky Duck Games decides to remove the app or something weird like that. I don’t have many board/digital hybrid games in my collection, and if I never add another I will still be happy with this one (ahem, keep your eyes peeled for the Chronicles of Crime: 1400 preview I will be doing soon – or will have done depending on when you read this review). Purple Phoenix Games gives Chronicles of Crime an enthusiastically shifty-eyed 11 / 12. I think you might get bonus VPs at the end of the game for putting on a British accent when you play. I’ll have to scour the rules for that one…
  
The Mistletoe Bride
The Mistletoe Bride
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Sometimes we all need a little bit of a pick-me-up during the holiday season. It’s supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year and all that, but it’s frickin’ stressful. Between the in-laws and the holiday shopping (not to mention the calories. Yikes!), December can quickly turn into a jolly nightmare. However, The Mistletoe Bride is perfect for getting into the holiday season.

You see, Eve is having her own trouble this Christmas season. Two weeks before Christmas, her fiance breaks everything off with her because he had been having an affair with his secretary and had gotten her pregnant. This leaves her single and with two tickets to paradise she had been going to surprise her husband with. And she plans to do something crazy. Instead of moping at home, or going on vacation by herself, she plans on asking a perfect stranger on going on vacation with her.

Nick Christmas is shocked when a beautiful and mysterious woman asks him to go on a trip with her, and he’s a little wary, too. But after talking with her for a few minutes in a coffee shop, he’s drawn to her. He’s more than ready to go on vacation with Eve and help her forget her sorrows, but he knows there’s more to everything than an innocent holiday when she starts hearing bells in his laugh. After all, Nick is destined to become the next Santa Claus– and it looks like Eve is destined to be his bride.

First of all, “Two Tickets to Paradise” by Eddie Money will get stuck in your head when you’re reading this. So if you know the song but hate it (but why would you hate it, unless you’re insane?), this might not be the best stress reliever. (I happen to like the song just fine, so no harm done to me.)


Like I said before, this is a great pick-me-up for the holiday season. And that’s all it is: a pick me up to enjoy that will get you in the mood for Christmas. If you like made-for-TV Christmas romances, then you’ll probably like The Mistletoe Bride. It’s adorable. Eve is all innocent and vulnerable and kind, and Nick is all strong and protective and kind. He really wants to help Eve heal from the damage done from her last relationship, and he doesn’t rush her even though he knows she’s his mistletoe bride. It’s incredibly sweet. And I really like how Scarlett Jade build the magic and myth of Santa Claus like she did. Inheriting the role of Santa, a magic suit that fits all Santas perfectly, the knowledge of everyone, as if he’s a god…. it’s pretty awesome.

But the book isn’t perfect. It was anticlimactic, honestly. Yes, there was a lot of suspense what with the Winter Elf trying to destroy Christmas and the race to the altar and everything, but it was rushed. The Winter Elf didn’t even come in until later and probably just to add a little spice to the mainly bland aftermath of Eve’s and Nick’s betrothal. The big villain in the whole book just wanted to make toys for Santa’s workshop. That’s it. I mean really? It’s a romance, not a thriller, I know, but we could have drawn it out a little bit more.

There also shouldn’t have been any sex scenes in this book. I know, this is a really strange complaint for me. After all I love sex scenes and they’re never a problem, right? (But hell is not freezing over right now because the Winter Elf is too effing busy making toys for Santa to cause some damn chaos!) The thing is, the love interest is Santa. Even if he’s young and about to marry his soul mate, he should not have sex appeal. Why? Because he’s Santa. He defined at least a third of my childhood (I really love Christmas) and he’s supposed to be a jolly gift-giver who loves cookies. Having a Santa Clause with sex appeal is like having a Mickey Mouse with sex appeal. Just. Don’t. Do it.


Even Spock thinks a sexy Santa is weird.
Since I was in the right mood for this book when I read it, I’m giving it four out of five stars. But most days I would probably only give it three.
  
Hart Broken (Cale & Mickey #1)
Hart Broken (Cale & Mickey #1)
Annie Arcane | 2017 | Romance
8
7.5 (2 Ratings)
Book Rating
Genre: Contemporary

Goodreads Rating: 4.75/5 stars

My rating: 4/5 stars

Mickey Hart doesn’t do one-night stands. Until she wakes up in a luxury penthouse. With nothing but a t-shirt. And no idea who it belongs to.

Enter Cale Windermere. Driven. Ambitious. Successful. And so gorgeous he could’ve walked straight out of a romance novel…

Except he can’t walk. Not that it ever stops him from getting what he wants. And he wants Mickey. Even if she’s keeping secrets from him.

This book…

Where do I even begin? It has a strong start and it stays strong. Mickey is awkward and funny. She starts out at the perfect chick lit character.


“Cale Windermere,” he said, sticking out his hand.
“C-Cale?”
“Yeah. Like the leafy green, just take off the K and replace with a C.”
Oh. My. God.
“And you are?”
“Uh…”
Cale raised an eyebrow, chuckling lightly.
Say something, Mickey.
“I-l’m, uh…”
Something intelligent. And preferably English.
With the help of a mental slap, Mickey willed herself to take his hand and shake it, a bit too eagerly. “I-I’m Mickey.”

It’s difficult not to like her. I like even more that she doesn’t really care Cale’s in a wheelchair and she doesn’t do anything stupid and awkward like kneel down so they’re eye level or act as if he’s an invalid. Even though she does notice the wheelchair, she is easily distracted by how attractive he is.

Carefully taking a sip, Mickey did a once over of the man sitting in front of her. Cale’s shirt was just fitted enough to show off the remarkably solid build of his upper torso. She jotted down a mental list of all his attractive attributes thus far.
Thick, unruly chocolate locks. Gorgeous emerald eyes. Award-winning smile.
And he had a long list of greats.
Great back. Great shoulders. Great chest. Great arms.
Really great arms.
She ran her nails over the hot ceramic.
You’d never think that something was wrong with him.
She wondered if he had great abs too.

So I love Mickey. And the farther I got into the book, the more complex she became. I found myself really wanting to know why she was so commitment shy and found it difficult to sleep in the same bed as someone.

I love Cale a lot too, although not as much as Mickey. He’s charismatic, sexy, and very much in love with Mickey. He’s everything you’d expect in a love interest. So much so, he’s a bit of a cliche. Just because he can’t walk doesn’t mean he’s not a stereotypical billionaire love interest.

Cale gets self-conscious about his disability at times, and he has a lot of emotional baggage from that and his ex wife. But he’s pretty easy to get, and I don’t feel the same complexity with him I do with Mickey. That being said, he does have flaws, and I love that. He gets mad at Mickey and fed up with her unwillingness to share.

“Essentially, you’re more than happy to fuck my brains out but you won’t stay by my side. How am I doing so far, Mickey?”
“Cale…”
“So I understand, okay? Well, I wouldn’t exactly call it understanding,” he corrected himself wryly. “But I get it. I get that you need your space. It didn’t take a fucking genius to figure that one out. And I’ve tried my best to respect that…”
True.
“And be patient…”
True.
“And understanding.”
All painfully true.
He suddenly looked exhausted. And he suddenly sounded exhausted, “But Jesus, Mickey.” Shaking his head slowly, Cale blew the hair out of his eyes and sighed, “You need to throw a guy a bone eventually.”

Gotta love that he’s human and isn’t an eternal patience machine. So Cale’s all right. However, the chapters from his point of view are really weird.

They’re short, in first person, and melodramatic. A lot of the time the reader doesn’t get to see where he is or what he’s doing. Instead, they just hear his internal thoughts about Mickey. That’s it. And they’re melodramatic and repetitive, especially in the beginning of the book. The farther into the book, the more fleshed out the chapters get. But a full star is knocked off for those earlier chapters.

Despite that, I definitely recommend reading this book. It’s darker than most contemporary romances, which is very refreshing, but it has plenty of light and hilarious moments. Definitely worth the read.

If you liked this review, or know someone who might like Hart Broken, then I’d definitely appreciate it if you shared this post with your friends. Thank you, and have a great day!
  
Confessions of an Expat in Paris
Confessions of an Expat in Paris
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
I’ve been a fan of Vicki Lesage for years. I’ve read both Confessions of a Paris Party Girl and Confessions of a Paris Potty Trainer. So I was thrilled when she contacted me for an honest review (click here to learn how to get me to review your book).

Paris Potty Girl details her first few years in Paris, from bar-hopping to getting her first apartment to meeting her husband and Paris Potty Trainer, of course, details pregnancies and getting used to parenthood.

Confessions of an Expat in Paris is an anthology of anecdotes spanning across both these eras in Vicki Lesage’s life. You’ll learn about the cheesy and downright weird pick-up lines she received from French guys as well as the time she might have eaten part of her friend’s thumb.


Yep, you read that last sentence right.
Each anecdote is paired with a drink recipe, many of which sound really good. I can’t wait to try the mulled gin recipe.

Mulled Gin
For when you need to recover from face mask fails
1 bottle of red wine
12 oz. gin
1 teaspoon honey
1 oz. orange juice
1 oz. lemon juice
1 cinnamon stick
Add all the ingredients to a pot
Stir and Simmer until honey is dissolved
Serve warm
I really enjoyed Expat in Paris. The stories are usually hilarious and sometimes just a little bit cringy in a good way. Others are sweet and make me smile, like when she was on her honeymoon with her husband.

With her first two books, I felt like there was more of an overall story instead of disjointed anecdotes. As much as I liked being able to enjoy a quick and witty snapshot of her life before I had to get back to my own, I think I preferred the more continuous storyline in Party Girl and Potty Trainer.

While some of the stories were without a doubt hilariously absurd, like her boss’s father asking about how her vaginal rejuvenation was coming along in front of her coworkers (what the everloving fuck), others were less climactic. Lesage included an entire chapter about how she’s an awkward dancer, except when she did the Dirty Dancing move with her brother on her wedding.


A perfect wedding dance move.
The dancing chapter felt more like a summary than a specific moment in her life, which made my eyes glaze over. And she only casually mentioned what could have been some good stories, like her drunkenly dancing on tabletops in public. I would have loved a complete chapter about one of those times, but they are only mentioned now and then.

Vicki Lesage often makes me laugh out loud when reading her books. Her chapter “10 Ways Living in Paris is Like Dental Work” will always make me smile. She talks about how both involve interesting flavors, a lot of paperwork, and a lot of money, and I’ll go “Oh shit, she’s right.”

Now and then, however, her jokes miss the mark. At one point she veered off-topic to stage an imaginary trial to defend herself against herself for eating so much Ben and Jerry’s ice cream and then, within the trial, she goes even more off-topic by talking about how France doesn’t have Phish Food flavor until I just wanted to skip the chapter.


As of this review, I still haven’t tried any of the drink recipes, but I trust a former hardcore drinker like Vicki Lesage to come up with some good drinks, although I don’t think I’ll ever try The Fluoride Treatment because, well, ew. Not the drink itself, but the name. Even though it’s relevant to the chapter, I’m weirdly squeamish.

However, most of these drinks are probably not for amateurs like me, who drink wine out of a box and can’t tell the difference between Stella Artois and Schlitz (I’m guessing. I’ve never actually had Schlitz. But Stella Artois tastes like every other beer to me).

With the exception of the mulled gin, most of the drink recipes require either a martini shaker or a blender. You can probably mostly pull off these recipes without either, though. Just don’t take a page out of Lesage’s book and use lite pancake syrup instead of honey.

I rate Confessions of an Expat in Paris 4 out of 5 stars. It’s a hilarious book that I recommend to anyone who wants a light-hearted memoir.
  
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Kirk Bage (1775 KP) rated HANNA in TV

Aug 17, 2020 (Updated Feb 18, 2021)  
HANNA
HANNA
2019 | Thriller
7
7.1 (11 Ratings)
TV Show Rating
Joe Wright’s 2011 film version of Hanna starring Saoirse Ronan, Cate Blanchett and Eric Bana is an odd movie. It isn’t bad. It just doesn’t work. The idea at its heart is great, as are some of the action sequences, there is just something over styled about it that is jarring. I’ve been back to it a few times to see if age helps, but it really doesn’t – Hanna the movie is an admirable failure.

So when Amazon announced they were resurrecting the character, the basic story and idea and the essential vibe of Hanna in 2019 as a series… I was pretty sceptical. I doubt to this day I would have watched it at all if I hadn’t stumbled across the trailer and been arrested by the presence of this young girl who had been cast in the main role. She looked wild and vulnerable at the same time, her eyes were piercing and something about her was just jumping off the screen. I went to IMDb as is my habit to find out who she was. Turns out her name was Esme Creed-Miles, the daughter of actors Samantha Morton and Charlie Creed-Miles.

Wow, yes, that made sense! I love Samantha Morton in anything – have done ever since she played Joanne Barnes in Cracker, aged 17. She has a ferocious beauty and edge of danger about her that is entirely feminine but also fearlessly strong and individual. Her roles have always been diverse, because she is capable of total power or intense vulnerability, sometimes in the same character, all laced with a focused intelligence that is quite rare. So, I had basically seen all of that in a two minute trailer staring a chip off the old block. Now I was excited to see it!

I wouldn’t say the set up of season one blew me away, but it did have enough going for it to keep me watching. Not as a binge watch, which usually indicates how much I am into something, but for sure as a steady desire to come back for more in time. Joel Kinnaman made a decent replacement as Erik, the father figure who teaches Hanna to survive, and Mireille Enos was doing a lovely job in the Cate Blanchett role as an ambiguous villain / ally. But it was all about Esme Creed-Miles, who was consistently delivering a performance of mesmerising quality – I could not take my eyes off her. As with the character she was playing there was some learning to be done in understanding the rules of this world, but she had obviously been trained well by a parent with huge experience in these things.

Season one ends with a tantalising cliffhanger, and there didn’t seem to be much of a wait to get back into it in season two, which felt more assured and more mature from the start. It came to me at a weird time in lockdown where I had no internet or means to watch anything I hadn’t downloaded already, which was a handful of films I’d already seen and season two of Hanna. I ended up watching each episode at least three times each, sometimes in a row, and sometimes going back… it just became a real companion to me in an odd way. I got hooked on it in a way I would find hard to describe – sometimes a show does that to us, even when objectively we know it isn’t the best, or most original, thing ever made.

It isn’t badly made by any means, but it is perhaps a little predictable at times. It has a high production standard, but still feels very much like TV and not a feature film in episodes. The action choreography is always great, as is the overall story arch. What is perhaps a little lacking is consistently strong dialogue, directing and supporting acting, especially when the cast of season two depends on a lot of teenagers, none of which have half the natural ability of Creed-Miles.

My main feeling about Hanna is to state I really enjoyed it, without overstating that it is any kind of genius, or is treading any new artistic ground. It is just a solid entertainment worth the time, and I will definitely be looking forward to season three. The entire project has a strong female core, and that is worth seeing in 2021. I suspect the main thing watching this will bring, however, is the genesis of a future superstar. Mark my words – Esme Creed-Miles just turned 21 and the film world is ready for the next Emma Stone, Jennifer Lawrence or… Samantha Morton.
  
Com-Pet-Ability
Com-Pet-Ability
2019 | Animals, Card Game, Kids Game
I have two dogs: a Yorkshire Terrier and a Powderpuff Chinese Crested. I love them dearly, but I just cannot see myself having any more 4-legged mammal pets. We promised our son a pet fish when we move (or a whole aquarium community if my wife will allow), but other than that, we will NOT be adding more pets to our household. So when I heard about a game that requires you to collect cards so that you have five pets to take home I immediate gave the deer-in-headlights look. No, I would not have a pet deer.

ComPetAbility is a card game with two play modes: a mode for players aged 7+ and one for younger gamers. We will be taking a look at the game for older gamers. In this game mode a player is attempting to amass five pets that will be accepting of each other and not cause heck in your house.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of the game for the purposes of this review. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rule book, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy from the publisher directly or from your FLGS. -T

To setup, shuffle the large deck of cards and deal five to each player. Put the rest of the cards in the middle of the table as a draw pile, flip one over for the “shed” pile. You are now setup and ready to go!

The goal of the game is to begin a turn with five compatible pets (com-pet-able). This is achieved by having five cards whose three icons are satisfied with each other. For instance, turtles are compatible with every other type of animal, so the three icons on turtle cards are all green – compatible with all dogs, cats, and birds. Some dogs are compatible with other dogs but not cats, and some cats are compatible with other cats or kittens but not birds.

So on a turn, a player will choose a card to draw from either the draw pile or the shed pile to add to their hand. A turn ends when that player sheds (discards) a card to the shed pile. Turns continue in this fashion until a player begins their turn with five compatible animals. Players will then add up the points in their hands (the numbers in the upper right corner of the cards) of compatible animals. The player that ended the game with a completed set of five animal pets will score a bonus 10 points to add to their total. Whomever scores the highest is the winner of ComPetAbility!

Components. This is a stack of cards in a tin can. Yep, a tin can with a plastic lid. It’s very novel and lovely, but heck for someone who cares about how the games look and fit on their shelves. The game cards are good quality, which is handy because the game mode aimed at smaller children have them handling the cards a lot too so they have to be able to withstand that abuse. The art is cute, and the layout is easy to understand – even for young ones. No issues with the components from us (aside from the can not being a box, wink wink).

So here’s the thing with this one. We liked it. It is a great idea and is executed well. I don’t think I will pull this one out with adult gamers anymore though. The children’s mode of this game is what I hold dear, as my three-year-old LOVES it and “wins” every time. I have just played this one too many times where a player can be dealt either a winning hand or four of the five cards right away. I’m no designer, so I don’t know how to mitigate that besides chalking it up to “luck of the draw.” But that’s a negative for me, and perhaps I shouldn’t let it detract from an otherwise enjoyable game, but it’s what comes to mind every time I see on the shelf as a possibility for Game Night. However, if you like the theme, the style, and ease of play between two different modes then check it out. It can be used as a light filler, a gateway game, or children’s game. So for the pure flexibility of this one, Purple Phoenix Games gives it a canned (hehe) 13 / 18. The turtles are really cute, but the hybrid animals are kinda weird-lookin’.