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The Witches (2020)
The Witches (2020)
2020 | Adventure, Comedy, Family
Not a patch on the original
The Witches is a 2020 retelling of the Roald Dahl children’s story, from director Robert Zemeckis. Remakes and reboots have been commonplace in the movies for quite some time, so it’s no surprise that The Witches has been given a Hollywood makeover, especially as it has been 30 years since the original film adaptation was released in 1990. I will readily admit that the original film is a childhood favourite, so this remake has very big shows to fill.

This time round, the story has been transported to late 1960s Alabama. It follows a unnamed boy (named in the credits as simply ‘Hero Boy’), played by Jahzir Bruno, and his grandma (Octavia Spencer) as they encounter a witch in their home town, prompting her to whisk him away to a seaside resort. Unbeknownst to them, this seaside resort is also where the Grand High Witch (Anne Hathaway) is due to unveil her dastardly plans to transform the world’s children. In his bids to thwart the witches plans, Hero Boy bumps into some familiar names, greedy English boy Bruno Jenkins (Codie-Lei Eastick) and put-upon hotel manager Mr Stringer (Stanley Tucci).

I was very sceptical about this in general, and while I think my scepticism was most definitely warranted, I was at least pleasantly surprised that moving the action from England to 60s America worked. It gives the film a different vibe with a new setting (with some very good costume and set design too), yet still keeping the same base story. However I’m afraid that’s the only good change that they’ve made in this entire remake. The 60s setting works, but the hotel itself lacks the beauty and grandeur of the hotel in the original. Gone are the imposing shots of a beautiful old hotel set on top of a cliff with its gorgeous landscapes (which incidentally is a real life hotel called The Headland which is on my travel wish list), and instead replaced with something that looks good on the surface, but is sadly lacking in realism and has obviously been entirely computer generated.

And this is the major problem with The Witches (2020), it’s over reliance and overuse of CGI. Everything in this, from the mice to the hotel exteriors to the witches true appearance, are all computer generated, and not particularly well at that. The mice look pretty bad and unrealistic, but the worst of all is what they’ve done to the witches. The changes themselves may have worked had this used practical effects, but sadly the CGI only serves to highlight how ridiculous the changes are. From the missing two fingers on each hand to the elongated mouths with demon like tongues, the witches to begin with seem creepy but after this initial shock, you see how absurd and laughable they really are.

Unfortunately even the performances can’t save this adaptation. Octavia Spencer is as reliable as always and Jazhir Bruno and Codie-Lei Eastick are quite adorable, but the rest of the fairly decent cast are sadly misplaced. The usually loveable Stanley Tucci is given absolutely nothing to work with, not even giving him a chance to try and match up to Rowan Atkinson’s original Mr Stringer, and Chris Rock is sadly out of place as the voice of older Hero Mouse. However the worst offender here is Anne Hathaway. Admittedly she isn’t helped much by the poor transformations to the witches appearance, but all the CGI in the world couldn’t fix her questionable Eastern European accent and hammy performance. The fact that Angelica Huston put in a more sinister and believable performance with 90s facial prosthetics and practical effects is a credit to her and only highlights how bad a choice Hathaway was for this role.

While parts of this remake aren’t entirely condemnable, as some aspects do stick closer to Dahl’s original source material, overall it is a far inferior adaptation that loses everything that made the 1990 film such a classic. Gone are the sinister witches and the dark stories of missing children (the girl stuck in the picture is an image that has always stuck with me), instead replaced with a far too lighthearted story with an over reliance on CGI. The most worrying thing of all is that even Robert Zemeckis and Guillermo Del Toro being involved couldn’t save this.
  
Marionette (Dark Carousel #3)
Marionette (Dark Carousel #3)
Anya Allyn | 2017 | Horror, Paranormal, Young Adult (YA)
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
I have definitely taken a shine to the Dark Carousel series by Anya Allyn. There's something about it that has definitely reeled me in. As soon as I finished reading Paper Dolls, I dove right into reading Marionette, the third book in the Dark Carousel series. This one definitely had a lot of action going on!

Cassie and Molly are prisoners in Balthazar's castle as its inhabitants try to find the second book of The Mirrored Tree. Cassie and Molly desperately search for a way to leave the castle so she can be reunited with her family and with Ethan. However, things take a turn for the worst when Cassie learns her fate of which she can not escape if she wants to save her world and all of its occupants.

I find that the plot of each book in the Dark Carousel series gets weirder and weirder. The plot in Marionette so much different to the one that first started it all in Dollhouse. However, Marionette was a fast paced read, in fact, in some parts, it was a little too fast paced. There were times I was left feeling confused about what was going on. Luckily, that only happened a few times, and the rest of the plot felt solid. Marionette was quite a page turner, and I kept wanting to know what would happen next. Marionette definitely has more action in it than Paper Dolls did. It seemed like there was always something happening in Marionette. This book focused more on Cassie and somewhat on Ethan. We learn more about the different worlds (which has me confused) and more about the ice world which Cassie is from. We also learn more about Zack, Viola, Emerson, and Parker as well as the castle itself. I do wish the worlds weren't as confusing. It's hard to keep up with all the different worlds and what happens when you see your copy on that world. I wish it was better explained or that there was some kind of appendix or something in the book to help explain it. I also don't understand why the bad people need Molly. I sort of understand why they want Cassie, but I don't see what use Molly is to them as she has no powers or anything of the sort. There were a few plot twists that I didn't see coming. This book didn't really end in a cliffhanger, but I will still read the last book in the series to complete the story.

As always, Anya Allyn did a fantastic job with her characters. Cassie puts up a good fight and tries to protect everyone. I was really routing for her throughout Marionette. Molly is written well, but I feel like she's sort of a useless character. I wish I knew more about why Aisha decided to just give in to the Batistes, so more backstory there would have been nice. I am hoping there will be more backstory on Lacey as well so I can know why she sometimes speaks in third person. I know it was sort of explained that she went crazy after everything went down at the end of Dollhouse, but I'd like to know a bit more. Perhaps all of these things will be explained in the last book of the series. One character I felt bad for was Zack. I felt like he was sort of a prisoner in all of this too, yet he's very protective and sweet towards Cassie. I get why Cassie was angry at him, but he had no choice. I really wished Cassie was a bit nicer towards him in the book. I was saddened that there was hardly any Jessamine in Marionette. Jessamine is my favorite character, yet she's only in the book for the beginning for a little bit. I'm hoping she'll be featured more in the next book.

Trigger warnings for Marionette include death, murder, rape and attempted rape of a minor (not graphic), mentions of sex (not graphic), the occult, violence, alcohol, and imprisonment.

Despite the fast pacing in places, Marionette is still a great read. With great characters and lots of action, this book definitely holds one's attention throughout. I would definitely recommend Marionette by Anya Allyn to those aged 16+ who like a bit of science fiction with their supernatural horror. Now on to the next and final book in the Dark Carousel series entitled Music Box.
  
Widows (2018)
Widows (2018)
2018 | Crime, Drama, Thriller
Before I'd even seen anything beyond the plot and a poster I was confused. It really just felt like the poster was designed to catch people. "Look, we've got these big names! Come and watch it!" I know that's what posters are meant to do, but considering the movie is about these women taking up the reins of their dearly departed I'd have had more respect for a poster that focused on them.

Widows has every chance to be great. Based on Lynda La Plante's Widows, with the screenplay written by Gillian Flynn and Steve McQueen, as well as being directed by the latter. Those three names should guarantee a success, and while it seems to be very popular among viewers it has left me some what cold.

The idea is a solid one that you would expect from La Plante's repertoire, and it's worked before. Unfortunately that could not bring it back from the brink for me.

I can't think of another film that has given me such an instant feeling of dislike. The opening scene made me cringe, and having it quickly change pace into a violently loud action scene and back again was jarring to watch.

The first inkling that something is awry comes fairly early on and even without much more you can see where the plot is going. I'm impressed that the trailers managed to stay away from anything obvious.

We have an interesting assortment of baddies and there are two perfectly contrasting ones in Jamal (Brian Tyree Henry) and Jatemme (Daniel Kaluuya) Manning. The former is charismatic and subtly scary, whereas the latter has no likable qualities (apart from a clear love of reading) and is extremely vicious. The other difference is that Jamal in enjoyable to watch and Jatemme isn't. Usually even the most loathed of villains is good to watch on screen, not in this case. Jamal comes out on top in the villain stakes even with the dog incident.

Normally I wouldn't think much beyond what you're presented with in each scene of the movie, but I quickly found myself wondering about a lot of things. Linda's interaction with Delia's husband was strange and one of many things that felt unnecessary. And while I'll happily believe that women could successfully execute a heist, I'm not really sure I can believe that THESE women could do it, I don't care how well documented his notebook was.

Something that seems to a popular device in this is "the flashback". At the beginning it lays up the backstory of the two crews quickly and gives you a good sense of the people, even though I feel the way it was executed on screen wasn't so hot. When the film starts to round up and these scenes give you the missing story at just the right point. The one's I didn't like were between Veronica and Harry. Not all of them were flashbacks, some were Veronica dealing with Harry's death. They seemed more on the dramatic side and didn't feel in-keeping with the rest of the film. (I will say that this film is listed on IMDb as "crime, drama, romance"... Romance seems like a bit of a stretch, and crime and drama as two separate things are very different to a "crime drama". I'll admit that it's a very slight difference, but I think it's still there.)

I'm not sure how the characters worked in the book, but I would assume that some liberties had to be taken to change the setting, and obviously when you're turning a book into a film then you're going to have to tie up some loopholes with jiggery-pokery. What was left were some characters with potential that never seemed to be filled and others that were so throwaway I had already forgotten about them when I read through the cast list after I'd seen it.

What you should do

I'd wait until this one is streaming. It doesn't require a big screen and I always think films like this are better if you can talk to the screen while you're watching them. "Why are you doing that?!" "Yeah, let's see how far that gets you!" and the like. It's got enough reasonable moments to watch it at least once.

Movie thing you wish you could take home

Obviously the giant piles of money are always appealing, but I'm very tempted to go for Linda's store. I'd love to work all day in a shop selling fantastical dresses and tiaras watching people's faces light up when they found the right one. It's like the Disney Princess dream come to life!
  
The Batman (2022)
The Batman (2022)
2022 | Action, Adventure, Crime
Too Long Of a Setup for a Terrific Payoff
The rap on the films of the DCEU - especially the films directed by Zach Snyder - is that they are too dark, dour and a “downer”, with very little joy or sunshine in the images or themes.

The Writer and Director of the new DCEU film, THE BATMAN, Matt Reeves (CLOVERFIELD) has one simple answer for you: “Hold my beer”.

Doubling down on the dark themes, imagery and attitudes of all involved, THE BATMAN is a 3 hour epic that is unrelenting in it’s bleakness with constant rain and dark images with not a peak of sun or color in the entire film. This bleakness and the slowness of the first 5/6 of this film will turn off the average viewer and will thrill only the most diehard of fans.

And that’s too bad for the last 1/2 hour of this film is pretty terrific, paying off the long setup beforehand with a confrontation between Batman (Robert Pattinson) and The Riddler (Paul Dano) that rivals just about any confrontation scene in comic books movie history (this side of Heath Ledger’s Joker).

Let’s start with the overwhelming look and feel of this film. It is a downer. Gotham City is, yet again, a city in decay with the bad guys over-running the good guys. Which begs this question - why would anyone join the Gotham City Police Department? But Director/Writer Reeves is is sure-handed in his approach to this material and he is unwavering in his bleakness. It is a strongly directed film that knows what it wants to be and does not pretend to be anything else - nor does it apologize for being what it is.

In this world is dropped Robert Pattinson (the TWILIGHT films) as the titular Batman and he is a perfect choice for this role in this film. His Batman is morose, dour, thoughtful and razor focused on being “vengeance”. He is not interested in being a good guy or a superhero, rather this version of Batman is focused on being a really good Detective, ferreting out evil-doers and administering punishment when they are caught. This film barely mentions Batman’s alter-ego, Bruce Wayne, and when Pattinson is on the screen in the guise as Bruce Wayne he looks uninterested in being Bruce Wayne, he’d rather be Batman - and this is a compliment for that is how this movie portrays this dual role. Batman is disguising himself as Bruce Wayne (and not vica-versa).

Assisting Batman in his Detective work is Lt. James Gordon (the always terrific Jeffrey Wright), the only honest cop in a corrupt Police Department. These 2 work as a Detective team, and this film often-times feels like a Detective procedural, some liken it to SEVEN with Brad Pitt/Morgan Freeman, I look at it more like the first season of TRUE DETECTIVE(the one with Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson), dark and interesting in their search for the bad guys.

As is typical of these types of films, we have a rogues gallery of villains. Some fair well - an unrecognizable Colin Farrel as Oz (the Penguin) and John Torturro as mob boss Carmine Falcone. While others fair less well - Peter Sarsgaard as corrupt District Attorney Gil Colson and, unfortunately, Zoe Kravitz as Selina Kyle (Catwoman). Both of these roles are not fleshed out well. Kravitz hits the screen looking good in her cat suit and while there is unmistakable sexual chemistry between Catwoman and Batman (not, it should be noted, between Selina Kyle and Bruce Wayne), but this only takes the character so far and Selina really wasn’t the bad-ass conflicted villain/hero that one would expect.

A pleasant surprise was the performance of the always interesting Paul Dano as the Riddler. He underplays this character in much the same way that most have overplayed him. Clearly, this is a smart, if mentally off, person who talks through riddles but has an overall plan to bring down “The Bat’ and the City. Not to spoil this film, but it didn’t really grab my attention until after the masked Riddler was unmasked and that was very late in the game - almost too late.

And that’s the problem with this film. The last 1/2 hour is TERRIFIC, but one has to sit through 2 1/2 hours of dark, dour setup to get there and for most, that journey will not be worth the payoff.

Letter Grade: B

7 Stars (out of 10) and you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis)
  
Assassin's Creed: The Official Movie Novelization
Assassin's Creed: The Official Movie Novelization
Christie Golden | 2017 | Fiction & Poetry, Film & TV, History & Politics
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Descriptive Writing brings out so much more information (6 more)
Characters and settings remain true in the adaptation
(Special Edition) Short stories to give more information and characters to the film
Action sequences are beautifully written
(Special Edition) Behind the Scenes stuff
(Special Edition) Beautiful Concept Art
(Special Edition) An overview of the Spanish Inquistion and the historical accuracy of the film
Leaves more questions that will hopefully be answered in the sequels (0 more)
Bringing forth what the movie could not
So, as you all know this film, and this franchise, are my favourites, so my opinion is somewhat bias, but please understand that I know that the movie is in no way perfect or close to perfect of what it could have been, but I love what they have done.

With that said, I turned my attention to the novel, and pre-ordered the special edition because I knew it would make a great addition to my collection of Assassin's Creed novels, and I wanted everything I could possibly get from the novel. I love all the behind the scenes features on a DVD/Blu Ray and when I heard that this book contained some BHS content I wanted it so badly that I made sure I got the special edition despite the addition to the price.

The adaptation of the Film to the novel, is incredible. When Movies are adapted from Books, there will always be the person with you that says "The Book is always better". Sometimes, in the vice versa of this situation, when books are adapted from films, it doesn't always add anything more to make the film's plot better, or give you anything else to think about. This book is something else entirely.

In the movie we are introduced to so many characters, and so many sub plots that just can't be explored in the film itself, because it would be what I and others like to call, a cluster fuck. There would far too much going on, and people already seemed confused by the simple plot of the film, that the addition of these subplots would have given them a headache and everything they needed to see to enjoy the movie would be lost even further, as people would walk out of the cinemas saying "What the heck did I just watch?". Books allow the writer and the reader the freedom to explore these subplots and open up our experience to these other characters such as Moussa, Emir, Nathan, and Lin. If you don't even know these names, that's because the film didn't get the opportunity to express to you the importance of these names, whilst introducing them in a way that you only really remember them as, 'The other assassins in the facility who organize the breakout of Abstergo finale'.

However these characters each have their own Assassin ancestors, at least two of which are heavily connected to the video games. Lin's ancestor, is Shao Jun, the protagonist who you play as in Assassin's Creed Chronicles: China. Emir's ancestor, is a Turkish Assassin named Yusuf, the same Yusuf who you befriend in Assassin's Creed: Revelations, whilst playing as an older Ezio Auditore in his final video game to end the Ezio Trilogy. In the movie's special features, there is a deleted scene in which Cal is able to see these ancestors, during the common room scene as he is trying to eat his steak. However it was taken out due to it not making much sense for him to be able to see other people ancestors via the bleeding effect. The novel on the other hand, doesn't need this scene, and instead the reader is treated to the thoughts and a little backstory to each of these modern day assassins, and how they had felt after being introduced to their ancestors, and how they connected to them through their own lives.

We learn even more about the films central characters as well, mainly Aguilar, Sofia and Callum Lynch, and the novel adaptation gives us a new view on their relationship as a whole. Sofia feels emotions she has never felt with other patients. Callum has a lot running through his mind that just can't be spoken or portrayed in the film. Aguilar's relationship to his fellow Assassin Maria is opened up to us, with us learning that they had been very intimate, and that despite never truly portraying their love for one another, the two assassins knew what the other was thinking and they moved and thought in unison with one another, which makes the final memory sequence, that much more heart breaking, and powerful.

The book grants us access to everything, and this is what makes it such a thrilling read. From start to finish I just wanted to read on and on, despite how heavy my eyes felt at night, tucked up in bed. It grips you and pulls you into the exciting journey of the beautifully written emotional rollercoster. Christie Golden, known for her own literary work and for her work on other franchise based novels, including Star Wars, World of Warcraft and Star Trek, has done a fantastic job at expanded the movie into a new experience, which even I wasn't expecting, and I've watched the film twice in the cinema and about 7 times since the day of it's digital release, March 10, 2017. I really do love this book and everything it has to offer.

My only bad point, which is personal to me, as I have theories about certain points of this movie, and I was hoping it would help answer some of my theories. However, whilst it expanded on them a little, giving more evidence to support one of my theories, it simply left more questions than answers. That is no fault of the writer or her work, but simply to my own inquisitive mind. The book overall has no faults in my opinion.

If you enjoyed the movie, you'll love the book more. If you didn't enjoy the movie, give the book a try. It might surprise you.
  
Daisy's Vintage Cornish Camper Van
Daisy's Vintage Cornish Camper Van
Ali McNamara | 2018 | Humor & Comedy, Romance
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
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Daisy's Vintage Cornish Camper Van by Ali McNamara is exactly the book I thought I needed to put me in a better mood!

When Ana inherits a camper van from her best friend, she needs to go to Cornwall to get it. A nice sea air and fish and chips are enver a bad choice. 

But when she arrives, she realises that the camper van is in a much worse state than she imagined. The fixing will take longer than she anticipated. On top of this, Ana finds a series of unsent postcards dating back to the 1940s, hidden in the van. This is a sign and Ana wants to make sure the postcards are delivered. 

And while the camper van is restored and Ana is helping other people be happy, she may eventually notice she is finding her way back to happiness again. 

<b><i>My Thoughts:</i></b>

Daisy's Vintage Cornish Camper Van got my attention from the moment I saw that beautiful cover. Then, I read the synopsis and I was sold. 

For me, both camper vans and postcards have a big importance in my life. I have always wanted to have a camper van and be able to go on a road trips and experience that freedom. Even though I was lucky to be able to travel the world, it is never enough. 

<b><i>"Yes, there's definitely something about a camper van that makes people smile. They're a happy vehicle, so people enjoy seeing them as much as their owners enjoy driving them."</i></b>

And postcards were always a way to travel without living my home. Get to meet other places and cultures, meet other people. It is extraordinary how many things I have learned about the world and the people from other countries just by reading their postcards.

<b><i>"Deltiology - it's the name for the study and collection of postcards. It comes from the Greek word deltios, which means "writing tablet" or "letter"."</i></b>

Ana is working in London, busy in her day-to-day job. When her best friend Daisy dies, she is completely lost. Daisy was everything she had, and now she is gone. When she inherits this van, Ana is eager to pick the van up and return to her normal London routine. She is not really a fan of travel, camper vans or camping. But Daisy was, and if she wanted for Ana to have this van and that was her last wish, this is the least Ana can do for her. 

<b><i>"These old vehicles are very sensitive - especially camper vans. They're the worst, very temperamental they can be."</i></b>

Throughout her stay, Ana meets Malachi, the mechanic, who sold the van to Daisy and who will help Ana restore it. He is a very interesting character with an interesting point of view on life.

He was my favourite character in the book. 

<b><i>"People pay a lot of money these days to find themselves. They're not really finding themselves, they're finding a version of themselves they feel happy to be for a while."

"We all change through our lives, and what you're happy to be when you're twenty is unlikely to be what you're happy being when you're older."</i></b>

Malachi also has a camper van himself. He always tells Ana why camper vans are amazing. If you are a fan of camper van, this book will be a favourite by default. 

<b><i>"But... you'd be mad not to at least try camping in her. It's a wonderful experience. You can drive where you like, set up camp and cook your dinner in the open air, even bed down under the stars if you're lucky. The freedom is amazing."</i></b>

I loved everything about this book. The story was beautiful. All the characters were likeable and real. They all had their stories and points of development. It was nice to see Ana finally healing and learning to be happy again. Malachi's story was beautiful and it was the perfect closure to his mission. Noah's personal story was also heartwarming, as he learns to accept what happened in the past and be able to move on. I also really want to talk about the mystery couple from the postcards, but I won't, in fear that I will spoil anything. But the development on that story was amazing and it helped Ana in many ways to heal herself, which was magical!

<b><i>"If something is worth doing, Ana - I hear one of her favourite sayings echo in my ears - it's worth doing well."</i></b>

To summarize - Daisy's Vintage Cornish Camper Van is my new favorite!

Beautiful and heartwarming. It will make you want to go on a road trip. I definitely recommend Daisy's Vintage Cornish Camper Van. And as with every book, I love learning random things, and here are some things I learned: 

<b><i>"Did you know the phrase "dilly-dally" is commonly attributed to the English music hall singer Marie Lloyd, but was actually in use much earlier than her 1918 song, as far back as the seventeenth century?"

"A Splitty. It's what we call a split screen camper van. All pre-1967 camper vans have a windscreen split in two. After that the new models all had the solid bay windows."</i></b>

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Daniel Boyd (1066 KP) rated the PlayStation 4 version of Fallout 76 in Video Games

Feb 27, 2019 (Updated Feb 27, 2019)  
Fallout 76
Fallout 76
2018 | Action/Adventure, Role-Playing
There is no merit whatsoever to this thing (0 more)
A Grotesque Atrocity of Modern Gaming and an Abhorrent Insult to it's Audience
When Fallout 76 was announced last summer, I was initially intrigued. Not knowing anything about it, I was surprised that we were getting this before Starfield, (which wasn't announced at the time but was heavily rumoured,) or the next entry in the Elder Scrolls series, but I hoped it would be on par with the Fallout series last fantastic interim game; New Vegas. Then at Bethesda's E3 conference, we were given the bad news that this was going to be an always online experience with an open world online hub and some light PvP elements.

Fast forward to November 2018 and the game launches to hugely negative reviews. The majority of online reviewers are pounding the thing into the ground and criticising the barrage of issues present in the game. Connection issues, sub par graphics, a vast assortment of glitches, a distinct lack of human NPC's, weird lighting and pop in and so on and so forth. I am quite happily playing through Red Dead Redemption 2 at this point and leaving Fallout 76 indefinitely on the backburner. The following week, the game is on sale for half of it's RRP, then as the weeks go on the price continues to drop.

Then, at the start of February, I am looking for a new game to stick my teeth into and I see a pre-owned copy of Fallout 76 on sale for only 20 quid. I think to myself, what the hell and give it a go. I had heard that a few patches had been put out to fix various issues and so I thought how bad can it be?

I have been playing video games for the last 20 years and I don't think that I have ever seen a more egregious assault on my principles as a consumer. There isn't even a game here.

If you have played any of the other Fallout games since 3, you will know that you suffer through the more grindy RPG elements of the game because the progression mechanics are married well enough with the games other systems that they aren't too noticeable or invasive. The characters, the locations, the quests and the story elements make up for the lacking gameplay and overall the games are enjoyable enough that the dated gameplay systems usually aren't penalised too hard in reviews.

Well imagine any of the other previous Fallout games, but with all of the reasons to play through it that I mentioned above stripped away, leaving only the annoying grindy bullshit that you normally put up with. Except here, there is simply no reason to put up with it.

This is the realisation that I came to last night after putting about 7 hours into the game and I decided to switch it off and never pick it up again.

There is no plot, there are no characters, there is absolutely nothing to see that you haven't already seen in previous Fallout games with more meat to them and there is simply no reason to play this game.

If past Fallout games are a big meaty, juicy leg of lamb, then this is nothing but the dry bone that is left after all of the good stuff has been ripped away.

This is nothing but a quick cash grab. I'm not even talking specifically about the disgusting micro-transactions present in the game such as making players pay £10+ to change the colour of their power armour. No, I'm just talking about the game as a whole as there is absolutely no other merit to it or reason for it to exist or be played other than to make Bethesda some easy money.

This thing shouldn't exist and the fact that it does is a huge slap on the face to the consumer and it pretty much encapsulates everything that is wrong with the mind-set of modern publishers. This game should be boycotted and if you have to pick it up out of morbid curiosity, do what I did and buy it used.

I have heard a few industry experts say that this could be the game that ends Bethesda, the final nail in the coffin after the let-downs of Fallout 4 and ESO. Although don't want this to happen as I never like to see a gaming company go out of business, to be honest I can't say that they wouldn't deserve it for the below the belt bullshit that they are trying to pull on their audience. As a consumer and a fan of this franchise as well as the studio that produced it, I feel betrayed on a personal level and it really is going to take something extraordinary to put them back in my good graces and the good graces of their audience.

The Witcher 3 came out 4 years ago this year and it still looks and plays better than anything Bethesda studios has developed, (and I'm not even a big fan of The Witcher.) Bethesda really needs to pull their finger out if they want to compete with their peers going forwards. Starfield better be running on a brank new slick engine and contain story and gameplay elements that are nothing short of spectacular if they are to redeem themselves from this disaster.

I was hesitant to score this a 1/10, as it is not the worst game of the generation, however in the context of the rest of the series and the motive behind this particular sorry excuse for an entry in the series, it is such an insult that my conscience would not let me award it as anything more than the lowest possible score.
  
The Maze Runner
The Maze Runner
James Dashner | 2011 | Children
7
8.0 (55 Ratings)
Book Rating
Emotional main character (0 more)
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Contains spoilers, click to show
There are murderous creatures in the maze, but the maze is your only way home.

Although there is power in numbers, no one in the Glade knows how they got there or why they're there. Everyone has a job, either making food or running the maze, hoping to find an exit, but they've been at it for two years.

Then there's the 'changing.' Anyone who has seen the creatures in the maze knows they can be stung instead of killed (which one is worse is hard to tell), it brings back unwanted memories of their life before the maze. All can agree, that have been stung, it's better to live with the Maze than with what's outside in the world.

In 'The Maze Runner,' James Dashner writes an action filled mystery that keeps the readers on their toes. Although the film is already out and has been viewed by millions, the book is well worth a read just because the movie kept out crucial parts that happened in the book!

The reader gets to follow Thomas from the very moment he enters the Glade; everything is new for him and for us. Thomas quickly wants to be a Runner (someone who runs the maze every day, from sun up to sun down), but the leaders of the Glade think he's a greenie (new person in the Glade) that thinks he's too good for hard labor: "Listen, trust me on this, Tommy. Start stompin' around this place yappin' about how you're too good to work like a peasant, how you're all nice and ready to be a Runner - you'll make plenty of enemies. Drop it for now." Thomas' fast friend, Newt, gives him sound advice.

Later in the book, Thomas ends up becoming a Runner after saving the leader of the Glade from the maze and its creatures. The maze's openings close at sundown every night, which means if you get caught in the maze afterwards, you are stuck out there until sun rise, and this is exactly what happened with leader, Alby and lead Runner, Minho.

As the walls were closing, Thomas and Newt saw the forms of Alby and Minho appear,but they both knew they wouldn't make it in time - Thomas runs inside just as the walls shut behind him. "Greenie,' Minho said, 'if you think that was brave comin' out here, listen up. You're the shuckiest shuck-faced shuck there ever was. You're as good as dead, just like us." Thomas also broke the biggest rule of the Glade : DO NOT ENTER THE MAZE IF YOU'RE NOT A RUNNER.

This entire night is the most important part of the book.

All of the characters in Dashner's first book of the series are interesting and diverse, even down to Newt's accent. My biggest complaint of this book was the author's over use of the words meters and centimeters; there are plenty of words out there that are used to describe how big or how small something is,but Dashner decided to only use those two words repeatedly. Also, all of the Gladers use code words for curse words, but this is never explained why they do this (such as shuck face instead of fuck face).

Then there's the telepathy that Thomas has with Teresa (the only girl to ever show up at the Glade) - this may be explained later on in the other books,but having only read this one so far - this is never explained. They use this ability quite a bit after Teresa wakes up from her 'coma,' that it almost seems like an afterthought that was just added to make the story more interesting.

I also don't have patience for characters that make a decision then suddenly change their mind the very next page. At one point, when Thomas and Teresa learn that there is a code for the maze, they agree that they shouldn't tell anyone about it,yet,suddenly, like right after Thomas states he doesn't need to tell anyone, he's thinking he MUST tell someone about the code.

But,the entire book isn't like this. Dashner is very fluid in his writing,and keeps the reader interested with really no downtime in between chapters - there just always seems to be something happening or going wrong!

Also, Dashner made Thomas into an emotional character, something that is odd in writing for a male character. He isn't afraid to show his emotions, and this is something that is very welcomed and written quite well throughout the book.

Yet, the other characters aren't written as well as our main character. A majority of the characters just seem angry all the time, walking around with a chip on their shoulder. Any other character that is mentioned, such as Zart, is a blank slate except for the slight description of what they look like.

The Glade and the maze are wonderfully described that even a light reader can imagine it. The creatures inside seem to take the cake when it comes to description, seeming that Dashner took more time out to describe these nightmarish beings.

I think the fact that the movie left out important parts of the book did a dishonor to Dashner's work. The book's version of events may not make more sense than the film's, but it made for a more interesting story. I do like the movies, but you MUST read the book if you like them. You missed out on quite a few things.

I certainly recommend this book. Most people don't categorize 'The Maze Runner' as a horror- genre book,but I ask you: if you woke up in an isolated community, where you can only get out if you solve the maze, which is covered in creatures that want to hunt you down and kill you, wouldn't you consider that a horrific problem?
  
A Court of Thorns and Roses
A Court of Thorns and Roses
Sarah J. Maas | 2015 | Young Adult (YA)
8
8.7 (108 Ratings)
Book Rating
After reading the Throne of Glass series, I didn't think that I could love SJM's next series as much. How could it compare? It doesn't, but not in a bad way. While it's also a book about the Fae, a Court of Thorns and Roses is set in an entirely different world with its own set of unique characters. It is also vaguely a retelling, or reimagining, of the Beauty and the Beast fairytale, which I loved. The human and Fae worlds are separated by an invisible wall and a Treaty that was crafted after a brutal war which took place 500 years earlier.

We are first introduced to Feyre, a girl who tries to take care of her family as best she can despite being the youngest. It is on one of her trip into the forest to feed her family when she stumbles across the path of a wolf whilst hunting a deer. After shooting and killing both animals, she skins the wolf and carries the deer home for food. Unfortunately for her, the wolf was actually a Fae male and her actions force her to make a choice. Either be killed or live forevermore in the Fae realm.

It is not much of a choice and Feyre chooses to go with Tamlin to his estate in Prythian, the land of the Fae. Tamlin, she later discovers is not only a High Fae, but the Lord of the Spring Court and much more powerful than she realized. He is joined by Lucien, another High Fae who is originally from the Autumn Court and not much else besides a few workers. The large estate seems empty and a little bit sad.

As one can expect from a Beauty and the Beast retelling, the girl must fall in love with the shapeshifting Fae beast to break a curse. the curse is not known to the reader or Feyre until the end of the book. She must fight to prove her love under the most harrowing of situations and trials.

A must read, especially if you wish to find out what happens. Highly recommended for teen/young adult readers who like fantasy, supernatural creatures and magic. The world building is amazing, the magic is awe inspiring and the lands are populated by a variety of characters from the heroes to the villains, the cowards, the friends and the just plain misunderstood.

Reread Feelings:
Slight spoiler warning for ACOTAR and ACOWAR.

A second read-through of a Court of Thornes and Roses let me to notice a lot more details that I had missed during my first introduction to the world. The inspiration that the novel drew from Beauty and the Beast was also more prevalent than I had realized. Her family life and desire to protect those she loves is directly pulled and inspired by the original novel. Tamlin’s beast form and temper are also reminiscent of the Beast in the story.

Knowing how the book ends and what happens in ACOMAF, you can more clearly see the actions and personality of Tamlin. He is very protective of Feyre and a little bit controlling, but without any direct threat to her life it is not as apparent. The events that occurred Under the Mountain pushed him over the edge and turned that protectiveness dark. It became corrupted and too strong to be overlooked. He also has an explosive temper and anger, but you see it less frequently as the book goes on. That doesn’t mean it goes away, so his personality in the second book is not as surprising as I thought it was my first time reading the series. It still like him in this series, but I don’t love him as much as I did during the first read through.

The incredible world of Prythian is just so packed with different faeries, Courts, and intense story that you can’t focus on everything the first time you read it. You discover more magic the second, or third, time you read through the book because you know the story and can now also focus on the read of the world building and character development. To me, that is fantastic writing when you can always discover something new hidden in a book you love.

I fell in love with the series even more on the second read-through, especially Rhysand. You truly appreciate just how much he did for Feyre, not just healing her arm when she was on death’s door but mentally and emotionally supporting her when she was ready to give up. He puts on a dark front, but his every action belies his true feelings. Rhys lies to Amarantha about the identity of Tamlin’s human love, even though it could mean his end and his people’s if she discovers the truth. On multiple occasions, he plays the bad guy to maintain a façade but secretly does good. I appreciated and recognized his acts a lot more the second time reading, and it made me fall in love with his character even more.

Even though I know what happens in the book, the emotions are still so prevalent. You ride the story’s highs and lows, feel yourself filling with light when there is goodness, and fear for the dark. I can’t even describe my feelings. I was walking around my room reading the final pages as Feyre is being hurt – and someone calls out her name. I just sort of collapsed to the ground, with my hand on my heart and my feelings bursting from my chest about that particular Fae male. You could almost hear the pain and horror in his voice as he cried out for her, and it destroyed me. The final moments of the book were so beautiful and made me a little teary.
  
Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang (2005)
Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang (2005)
2005 | Comedy, Romance, Thriller
8
7.9 (11 Ratings)
Movie Rating
In the early to mid-2000s, Robert Downey Jr wasn’t one of the highest paid actors in the world. He was busy attempting to rebuild his career after five years of constant struggles with various drugs, being in and out of rehab, and even spent at least a year and a half incarcerated. With all of the films Downey did in that period, including Gothika, A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints, A Scanner Darkly, Zodiac, and Charlie Bartlett, perhaps none are as memorable as Shane Black’s directorial debut and neo-noir black comedy Kiss Kiss Bang Bang.

Harry Lockhart (Downey) is a thief that finds himself in a peculiar situation. After almost being apprehended by the police while breaking into a toy store, Harry stumbles into an audition and impresses everyone when his reading cuts a little too deep and is strangely accurate to Harry’s current situation. Now seen as some sort of acting prodigy, Harry finds himself in Los Angeles awaiting his screen test. He’s introduced to Gay Perry (Val Kilmer), a gay detective that’s hired to bestow his detective wisdom on Harry for his new on-screen role.

But before character development can truly begin, Harry is re-introduced to Harmony (Michelle Monaghan); a childhood friend and the girl-next-door-type who Harry considers to be the one that got away. However, Harry’s newfound luck is short-lived. While tagging along with Perry during one of his cases, the two of them witness two men in ski masks drive a car off a cliff and into a lake. They discover a woman with a broken neck in the trunk and the realization dawns on them that this is bigger than either of them could have ever imagined. With multiple cases suddenly being connected to one another and clues coming together to form bigger pieces of the puzzle, maybe Harry, Perry, and Harmony meeting each other is fate and not just a coincidence.

While Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is a noir film on the surface, it also has that buddy cop dynamic that Shane Black perfected with the likes of the Lethal Weapon films and The Nice Guys. The film has elements of mystery, comedy, action, and thriller genres for an overall experience that is entertaining on a variety of levels. Harry guides you as the narrator throughout the majority of the film and there are some intriguing storytelling techniques utilized to help get Harry’s perspective across. There’s a sequence where Harry realizes he’s forgotten to tell the audience an important piece of information and the film reel acts like it’s about to run off track before it pauses showing what looks like the film paused between two frames of a film reel. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang has a few elements like this that capitalizes on Harry’s quirks while he narrates that gives the film and the story a refreshing ambience.

This is Robert Downey Jr’s favorite film of his entire filmography and it’s difficult to argue with that. At a time when Downey was trying to rebound, stay sober, and prove that he was still a talented actor, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang benefits from all of his strengths. As Harry, Downey portrays nearly every emotion imaginable and this performance reminds you why he has always been held in such high regard. Unlike Iron Man 3 which seems to depreciate in repeat viewings, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang holds up extremely well for a film that is 10+ years old and should be considered as one of Shane Black’s strongest films in general and to date.

The one downside was the way the film was released theatrically. The film didn’t expand to more theaters after its opening weekend and underperformed at the box office, but did well overseas and was a big hit once it was released on DVD. The Gay Perry character is considered to be the first openly gay character to headline a major motion picture in Hollywood and Val Kilmer is in top form in the role. The chemistry he has with Robert Downey Jr is overwhelmingly entertaining while Perry’s agitation with Harry’s incompetence as a detective is hilariously brought to light by Kilmer’s memorable performance.

John Ottman’s score is the unseen cast member of Kiss Kiss Bang Bang that helps cement the noir vibe the film is aiming for. The jazz-infused compositions invoke a sense of mystery and intrigue in the viewer that sets the tone of the film perfectly. For proof of this, look no further than the film’s opening credits which simultaneously feel like an homage to other noir films while also offering something completely new.

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang isn’t as overlooked as it used to be, but it still doesn’t seem to have the reputation it deserves. The film is entertaining on so many levels and the performances from the cast are exceptional. The music is superb and the story constantly captivates; Shane Black couldn’t have dreamed of a better directorial debut.

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is currently available to stream on Amazon Prime, YouTube, Google Play, and Vudu for $2.99 and iTunes for $3.99. The film is also free on Amazon Prime if you have Cinemax with Prime Video Channels. It is currently available on DVD for $8.49, Blu-ray for $16.99, and Multi-Format Blu-ray for $14.42 on Amazon. On eBay, the DVD is currently running $4.66 pre-owned and $4.50 brand new with free shipping and a brand new Blu-ray is $15.98 with free shipping.