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Matthew Krueger (10051 KP) rated House on Haunted Hill (1999) in Movies
Jul 17, 2019 (Updated Jul 17, 2019)
Sweet Dreams
So this movie excist, house on haunted hill should of never been remade or touching in the first place, the oringal is a classic with vincent price introducing the movie and also starring in it.
Who stars in this one ohh fanke janssen, geoffrey rush who is a good actor but wasted in this movie, Taye diggs i never heard of him since the early 2000's, and ali larter who was only good in heroes. So not a good start.
The plot: A millionaire with theatrical tendencies, Stephen Price (Geoffrey Rush) invites a number of people to stay in a vast creepy building that used to be an insane asylum. Stephen, accompanied by his bitter wife, Evelyn (Famke Janssen), offers a million dollars to anyone who can stay the whole night without leaving out of fear. When Stephen and Evelyn become trapped with their guests, they quickly realize that the house really is haunted -- and the spirits dwelling within are very angry.
This movie is not scary, not oringal, not celver, not haunted, its not good.
Also for no pair of reason sweams by marlyon manson plays for no pair of reason, not once but twice. Once when the guess are driving to hill house and once at the end cridits.
Dont watch this movie it is a waste of your time, just watch the oringal movie.
Who stars in this one ohh fanke janssen, geoffrey rush who is a good actor but wasted in this movie, Taye diggs i never heard of him since the early 2000's, and ali larter who was only good in heroes. So not a good start.
The plot: A millionaire with theatrical tendencies, Stephen Price (Geoffrey Rush) invites a number of people to stay in a vast creepy building that used to be an insane asylum. Stephen, accompanied by his bitter wife, Evelyn (Famke Janssen), offers a million dollars to anyone who can stay the whole night without leaving out of fear. When Stephen and Evelyn become trapped with their guests, they quickly realize that the house really is haunted -- and the spirits dwelling within are very angry.
This movie is not scary, not oringal, not celver, not haunted, its not good.
Also for no pair of reason sweams by marlyon manson plays for no pair of reason, not once but twice. Once when the guess are driving to hill house and once at the end cridits.
Dont watch this movie it is a waste of your time, just watch the oringal movie.
LeftSideCut (3778 KP) rated A Creepshow Holiday Special (2020) in Movies
Dec 23, 2020
Contains spoilers, click to show
Creepshow delivers the holiday themed goods once again with this Christmas special. Unlike the Halloween Special, this one is fully live action, and instead of being the regular two segments, it's one big 45 minute story.
The first half focuses on a dude attending a support group for people who are shape shifters, keen to find out exactly what he shapeshifts into. The group is filled with a few colourful characters who transform into all sort of things - tortoises, cheetahs, werewolves, boars. It's mostly dialogue but it's pretty fun. Adam Pally and Anna Camp head up the cast, and both seem to be aware just how silly the episode is and both ham up proceedings well enough. IMDb has listed Barbara Crampton, Marilyn Manson, Ali Larter and Keith David among others in the cast, but I'll be fucked if I spotted them anywhere!
The second half is when it gets festive when *SPOILERS* out of nowhere, it's revealed that Santa Claus hunts shapeshifters for a living and employs an army of shopping mall Santas to help him in his fight. Shit gets ridiculous as everyone transforms, Santa turns up in some crazy demon armour with actual robotic claws for hands, blood flies everywhere, scores of Santas are mown down by gunfire - it's so so dumb, but goddam entertaining.
There isn't really any underlying message here. Writer/Director Greg Nicotero just wanted to go all out and schlocky as possible, and I'd say he achieved his goal pretty effectively.
This holiday special is a boat load of fun, and another solid piece of evidence as to why Creepshow is an essential part of horror television. Ho Ho Fucking Ho!
The first half focuses on a dude attending a support group for people who are shape shifters, keen to find out exactly what he shapeshifts into. The group is filled with a few colourful characters who transform into all sort of things - tortoises, cheetahs, werewolves, boars. It's mostly dialogue but it's pretty fun. Adam Pally and Anna Camp head up the cast, and both seem to be aware just how silly the episode is and both ham up proceedings well enough. IMDb has listed Barbara Crampton, Marilyn Manson, Ali Larter and Keith David among others in the cast, but I'll be fucked if I spotted them anywhere!
The second half is when it gets festive when *SPOILERS* out of nowhere, it's revealed that Santa Claus hunts shapeshifters for a living and employs an army of shopping mall Santas to help him in his fight. Shit gets ridiculous as everyone transforms, Santa turns up in some crazy demon armour with actual robotic claws for hands, blood flies everywhere, scores of Santas are mown down by gunfire - it's so so dumb, but goddam entertaining.
There isn't really any underlying message here. Writer/Director Greg Nicotero just wanted to go all out and schlocky as possible, and I'd say he achieved his goal pretty effectively.
This holiday special is a boat load of fun, and another solid piece of evidence as to why Creepshow is an essential part of horror television. Ho Ho Fucking Ho!
LeftSideCut (3778 KP) rated Resident Evil: Extinction (2007) in Movies
Nov 25, 2020
"Slowly but surely, the Earth began to wither and die." - Alice
This quote sums up how I feel about the Resident Evil series and it's effect on the world of movies...
Resident Evil: Extinction is the third in the franchise, and honestly, it's a big improvement on the first two. The effects are a lot better for a start, and it feels more like a horror. It at least attempts (and unfortunately fails) to make you care about other characters other than Milla Jovovich's Alice, and it does have some good shots here and there, courtesy of Highlander director Russell Mulcahy.
However it has a butt load of issues (surprise surprise).
Although it leans more towards horror than before, Extinction ticks off every zombie cliché in the book, but has the arrogance to act like it's showing the audience something new. This culminates in a laughable number of unearned and predictable jump scares, and any action scenes are once again riddled with unnecessary edits and cuts.
The characters are another issue. This series continues to drip feed characters from the games, but they're nothing more than glorified cameos. Claire Redfield (Ali Larter) is adapted this time around, and although it's nice to see her character, she doesn't really do much beyond leading a group of survivors around, a group of characters who feel like they're straight out of one of the boring episode of The Walking Dead.
Then there's poor Iain Glen. Before Game of Thrones came along, he was destined to always be that evil dude who got to be in video game movies. *Spoiler Alert* - he turns into the Tyrant from the game series near the end, but he still sounds like Iain Glen when he talks (which is really fucking weird), and is then dispatched without much hassle, meaning that once again, this film series fucks up another classic Resident Evil monster. We also get a tease of Albert Wesker but it's all thoroughly underwhelming.
Apart from all that, I still struggle to connect to Alice as a protagonist, no matter how undeniably badass she may be.
Extinction is way more watchable than most of these movies but still, they should be better, and they're not. Ugh.
This quote sums up how I feel about the Resident Evil series and it's effect on the world of movies...
Resident Evil: Extinction is the third in the franchise, and honestly, it's a big improvement on the first two. The effects are a lot better for a start, and it feels more like a horror. It at least attempts (and unfortunately fails) to make you care about other characters other than Milla Jovovich's Alice, and it does have some good shots here and there, courtesy of Highlander director Russell Mulcahy.
However it has a butt load of issues (surprise surprise).
Although it leans more towards horror than before, Extinction ticks off every zombie cliché in the book, but has the arrogance to act like it's showing the audience something new. This culminates in a laughable number of unearned and predictable jump scares, and any action scenes are once again riddled with unnecessary edits and cuts.
The characters are another issue. This series continues to drip feed characters from the games, but they're nothing more than glorified cameos. Claire Redfield (Ali Larter) is adapted this time around, and although it's nice to see her character, she doesn't really do much beyond leading a group of survivors around, a group of characters who feel like they're straight out of one of the boring episode of The Walking Dead.
Then there's poor Iain Glen. Before Game of Thrones came along, he was destined to always be that evil dude who got to be in video game movies. *Spoiler Alert* - he turns into the Tyrant from the game series near the end, but he still sounds like Iain Glen when he talks (which is really fucking weird), and is then dispatched without much hassle, meaning that once again, this film series fucks up another classic Resident Evil monster. We also get a tease of Albert Wesker but it's all thoroughly underwhelming.
Apart from all that, I still struggle to connect to Alice as a protagonist, no matter how undeniably badass she may be.
Extinction is way more watchable than most of these movies but still, they should be better, and they're not. Ugh.
LeftSideCut (3778 KP) rated Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010) in Movies
Dec 30, 2020
Just when it seemed that these movies were getting slightly better each time, along comes Afterlife to extinguish whatever tiny flame of hope was still flickering.
Paul W.S. Anderson is back at the helm (joy to the world) it's clear that his main intention is to make Milla Jovovich look as "cool" as possible, quipping at every chance given to her. The opening sequence is sort of entertaining, but the over abundance of signature Anderson misplaced arrogant smugness and shoddy CGI violently soils anything positive.
The main bulk of the film is actually a fairly stripped back affair. It's low on scares as per, but I'm not mad at the more grounded feel to proceedings. Just a group of survivors surrounded by zombies, trying to find a solution to their problems. However, this respectable approach to the narrative is squandered. None of the characters are worth caring about, and the few that are, are given no development, as they go through the motions with the smartass-yet-boring script.
In terms of game connections, Ali Larter is back as Claire Redfield, and Wentworth Miller plays Chris Redfield. Kind of cool, of course, but he honestly could have just been playing a dude with a gun. The fact that he is Chris bears no importance to the film. Wesker is there as well but eh. The Majini infected from Resident Evil 5 are present as is The Executioner from the same game. They visually look pretty decent, and unlike previous films, aren't humanised like Nemesis and Tyrant were, so points for that.
The main issue then is all the action. Apart from the dodgy CGI, the set pieces suffer from a truly horrendous amount of slow motion. Not even exaggerating here, if there was no slow motion, the runtime would have been 20 minutes shorter. It's honestly painful. There's also a lot of gimmicky 3D shit being thrown at the camera which I don't really care for - there's just nothing exciting going on.
I'm not sure where else to mention this so I'll put it here, there's not 1, not 2, but 3 seperate scenes that consist of overhead shots of Alice flying a plane with edgy breakbeat music blaring out over it. (Not being chased or anything, just flying and relaxing) Make of that what you will, but basically, everything I hated about the first Resident Evil is still accounted for 8 years later. It's still poorly imitating The Matrix, 11 years later.
I know that these films have a lot of fans, so maybe I'm missing something and being overly spiteful, but I just find them mind numbingly shit. Maybe something will click for me during the last two, but as it stands, Afterlife is the worst of the bunch.
Paul W.S. Anderson is back at the helm (joy to the world) it's clear that his main intention is to make Milla Jovovich look as "cool" as possible, quipping at every chance given to her. The opening sequence is sort of entertaining, but the over abundance of signature Anderson misplaced arrogant smugness and shoddy CGI violently soils anything positive.
The main bulk of the film is actually a fairly stripped back affair. It's low on scares as per, but I'm not mad at the more grounded feel to proceedings. Just a group of survivors surrounded by zombies, trying to find a solution to their problems. However, this respectable approach to the narrative is squandered. None of the characters are worth caring about, and the few that are, are given no development, as they go through the motions with the smartass-yet-boring script.
In terms of game connections, Ali Larter is back as Claire Redfield, and Wentworth Miller plays Chris Redfield. Kind of cool, of course, but he honestly could have just been playing a dude with a gun. The fact that he is Chris bears no importance to the film. Wesker is there as well but eh. The Majini infected from Resident Evil 5 are present as is The Executioner from the same game. They visually look pretty decent, and unlike previous films, aren't humanised like Nemesis and Tyrant were, so points for that.
The main issue then is all the action. Apart from the dodgy CGI, the set pieces suffer from a truly horrendous amount of slow motion. Not even exaggerating here, if there was no slow motion, the runtime would have been 20 minutes shorter. It's honestly painful. There's also a lot of gimmicky 3D shit being thrown at the camera which I don't really care for - there's just nothing exciting going on.
I'm not sure where else to mention this so I'll put it here, there's not 1, not 2, but 3 seperate scenes that consist of overhead shots of Alice flying a plane with edgy breakbeat music blaring out over it. (Not being chased or anything, just flying and relaxing) Make of that what you will, but basically, everything I hated about the first Resident Evil is still accounted for 8 years later. It's still poorly imitating The Matrix, 11 years later.
I know that these films have a lot of fans, so maybe I'm missing something and being overly spiteful, but I just find them mind numbingly shit. Maybe something will click for me during the last two, but as it stands, Afterlife is the worst of the bunch.