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Wolf Tales (Wolf Tales #1)
2
2.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
This is the worst piece of trash I have ever read. I have read better smut on Literotica.

 It was like Douglas tried to take something that was taboo (bestiality) and make it okay. She failed. HARD. Not only did she manage to write about bestiality, but rape, too. Within the first ten page of the book, the lead female wakes up in the dark to have sex with some naked wolfman stranger she can't even see and then goes on to make him let her live with him where they continue to have more sex for about 2 week. Apparently that's enough to fall in love with someone and not care about life anymore. Not only that, but the reason sex is so fantastic with him is because he has the penis of a DOG, knot and all, which she begs him to keep. Meanwhile, our little wolfman is lusting after the sorcerer who exposed him all to this, actually wanting the man to pretty much rape the wolfman (which isn't really rape since he wants it). Upon meeting the sorcerer, the wolfman is then "raped" by the sorcerer while the sorcerer is a wolf.

I stopped reading there.

In all the 76 pages that I read, the bestiality wasn't actually what made me hate this book. There was such an utter lack of plot line that this book couldn't even be considered a guilty pleasure book. I felt as if Douglas was trying to create plot line to explain the random sex that seemed to happen every chapter. Douglas also manipulated the characters responses and inner dialogue to make it seem as if their own feelings and thoughts conflict with what they really desire. The characters know that what they are doing is taboo, yet they still want to be raped by a wolf or have sex with a man with a dog penis.


Unfortunately for Douglas, the fact that she took something so socially taboo and tried to pass it off as an erotic novel without creating a realistic reason why any of it was happening made this book not only painful to read, but also near impossible to finish.

And before you bash me for not even finishing the book, I will tell you that I did read more than just the 76 pages. I know all about the Chanku and how the novel ends. I just couldn't force myself to read this piece of utter garbage in whole.
  
The Beast House (The Beast House Chronicles #2)
The Beast House (The Beast House Chronicles #2)
Richard Laymon | 2021 | Crime, Horror, Mystery, Thriller
8
9.0 (2 Ratings)
Book Rating
16 of 250
Book
The Beast House ( Beast House chronicles book 2)
By Richard Laymon

Once read a review will be written via Smashbomb and link posted in comments

Author Gorman Hardy is hot on the trail of another bestseller and if half what's said about Malcasa Point is true, he's bound to make a killing. Petite and pretty Tyler and sexy Nora visit Malcasa full of expectation. But Malcasa Point is a place of pain, bestiality and death in The Beast House.


Well I have to say it’s 100% better than The Cellar! I can see from other reviews a lot of people agree on it. I found myself enjoying this. It was a classic horror in my opinion and there’s nothing wrong with a bit of classic. I enjoyed the captains story on Bobo it was very King Kong based except this was a rampant rabbit monster gone wild! A bit of cheese to keep a girl who loves horror happy.
  
Zombies Vs. Unicorns
Zombies Vs. Unicorns
Holly Black | 2010 | Fiction & Poetry
6
8.0 (4 Ratings)
Book Rating
<b>Book Review</b>
I had heard about this feud soon after it started, so when news that a book was coming out I had to read it. C'mon, zombies and unicorns, this is a combination I couldn't miss out on. After a lackluster and disappointing start, with many stories I didn't like at all, I was starting to think I'd have a hard time finishing the book, even with the different authors. It wasn't until The Children of the Revolution by Maureen Johnson on page 147 that the stories picked up and I ended up enjoying the rest, though my enjoyment deviated from okay to great. The "arguments" between editors Holly Black (Team Unicorn) and Justine Larbalestier (Team Zombie) were usually quite amusing, though they themselves don't contribute to the book. I, for one, would have liked to have read their takes on their chosen teams.

I'm not going to review each story individually, but list them with my (very) basic impression of the story. The book has varying degrees of gore, cursing, sexual innuendo and references, bestiality (you read that right, but it's more referred to than shown, thank goodness), suicide, and other violent acts.

<u>Stories</u> (in order of appearance):
*The Highest Justice by Garth Nix (Marked as a unicorn story, this is actually both unicorn and zombie. A decent story.)
*Love Will Tear Us Apart by Alaya Dawn Johnson (Zombie. Did not care for this at all)
*Purity Test by Naomi Novik (Unicorn. Didn't hate this story, but wasn't fond of it either)
*Bougainvillea by Carrie Ryan (Zombie. Didn't like.)
*A Thousand Flowers by Margo Lanagan (Unicorn. Also wasn't fond of.)
*The Children of the Revolution by Maureen Johnson (Zombie. Rather twisted, but so am I, so I enjoyed it.)
*The Care and Feeding of Your Baby Killer Unicorn by Diana Peterfreund (Unicorn. My favorite story in the anthology.)
*Inoculata by Scott Westerfield (Zombie. Pretty good.)
*Princess Prettypants by Meg Cabot (Unicorn. Very tongue-in-cheek, I liked this story a lot.)
*Cold Hands by Cassandra Clare (Zombie. Interesting world created here. Definitely passed my likability test.)
*The Third Virgin by Kathleen Duey (Unicorn. An okay story.)
*Prom Night by Libba Bray (Zombie. Second favorite of the book and very close to a tie with Peterfreund's tale.)

The unicorn stories went in many different directions, with all sorts of unicorns, while most of the zombie stories stayed where you would expect them and had typical zombies, though there were a few surprises still in store. I went into this as Team Zombie, and while my favorite was a unicorn story, I still firmly remain with the shamblers. Overall, I ended up enjoying the majority of the book, so if you're interested in zombies, unicorns, or especially both, pick this up for an interesting assortment of stories.
3.5 stars for the print version

<b>Audio Review</b>
This unabridged CD set includes ten discs, which average a little over one story each, though generally there is one whole story bookended by the end of one preceding it and the start of another afterward that will continue onto the next disc. They have very short chapters, generally less than a minute and I could tell when each chapter ended and the next began, which didn't make for totally smooth listening but it also wasn't too bad either. I would have rather have had longer chapters that had a clearer starting and stopping point to make it easier to find my place again. Most of the readers, both male and female, sound fairly young, which makes sense since this is a YA anthology, but the majority also sounded as if they were reading to school children, which makes for annoying listening. I found most of the voices grating and unfortunately none of them are named for me to be more specific. However, the one male was fine and the woman who did Diana Peterfreund was good and I believe she also narrated one or two others in the book. The use of sound effects break up stories, a groan that also says "brains" for zombies and trumpets and a horse whinny for unicorns. Immediately after is the intro from the editors with their ongoing debate that became increasingly irritating as I read on; this may have to do with how they performed those discussions. As written word, these exchanges are far more entertaining. For the most part, I really didn't enjoy listening to this and much prefer reading it in print.
2 stars for audio
  
Beauty and the Beast (2017)
Beauty and the Beast (2017)
2017 | Fantasy, Musical, Romance
Tail as old as Kline.
With the Disney marketing machine in full swing, its hard to separate the hype from the movie reality in this latest live-action remake of one of their classic animated features from 1991. If you are lucky enough to have children you will know that each child tends to have “their” Disney feature: for my second daughter (then 4) that film would be “Beauty and the Beast”. With a VHS video tape worn down to the substrate, this is a film I know every line of dialogue to (“I’m especially good at expectorating”). So seeing this movie was always going to be a wander down Nostalgia Avenue and a left turn into Emotion Crescent, regardless of how good a film it was. And so it proved.

Taking no chances with a beloved formula, most of the film is an almost exact frame-for-frame recreation of the original, with the odd diversion which, in the main, is to slot in new songs by original composer Alan Menken with Tim Rice lyrics. For, unlike “La La Land” this is a proper musical lover’s musical with songs dropping in regularly throughout the running time.
Which brings us to Emma Watson’s Belle. I’ve seen review comments that she ‘dials it in’ with a humourless and souless portrayal of the iconic bookworm. I can’t fathom what film those people were watching! I found Watson to be utterly mesmerising, confident and delightful with a fine (though possibly auto-tuned) singing voice. Her ‘Sound of Music’ moment (you’ll know the one) brought tears to my eyes. There are moments when her acting is highly reminiscent of Hermione Grainger, but this is about as crass a criticism as saying that Harrison Ford has done his “Knock it Off” snarl again.

I even felt that the somewhat dodgy bestiality/Stockholm-syndrome thing, inherent in the plot, was deftly handled by her. Curiously (and I feel guilty for even thinking this) the only part I felt slightly icky about was the age difference evident in the final kiss between Watson (now 27) and the transformed beast (sorry if this is a TERRIBLE spoiler for you!) played by Dan Stevens (“Downton Abbey”): even though with Stevens being only 35 this is only 8 years! I think the problem here is that it is still difficult for me to decouple the modern feminist woman that is Watson from the picture of the young Hermione as a schoolgirl in her first term at Hogwarts. (I know this is terrible typecasting, and definitely my bad, but that’s the way it is).
Stevens himself is fine as the cursed prince, albeit that most of his scenes are behind the CGI-created wet-rug that is the beast. Similarly, most of the supporting stars (Ewan McGregor as Lumière, Ian McKellen as Cogsworth, Emma Thompson as Mrs Potts and an almost unrecognisable Stanley Tucci as the maestro Cadenza) are similarly confined to voice parts for the majority of the film. Kevin Kline is great as the supremely huggable Maurice. But the performances that really shine though are those of Luke Evans (“The Girl on the Train“) as the odiously boorish Gaston and Josh Gad (Olaf in “Frozen”) as his hilariously adoring sidekick LeFou. Much has been made of the gay Disney angle to this element of the story, most of which is arrant homophobic nonsense since the scenes are pretty innocuous. In fact the most adventurous ‘non-heterosexual’ aspect of the film, and a scene that raises by far the biggest laugh, relates to a completely different character.

Most of the songs delivered in the film are OK without, in my view, surpassing the versions in the original. Only Dan Steven’s dramatic new song “Evermore”- as one of the few really new ‘full-length’ songs in the film – has ‘Oscar nomination’ written all over it. However, the film eschews the ‘live-filming’ approach to song production featured in recent musicals like “La La Land” and “Les Miserables”, with some degree of lip-sync evident. Whilst I understand that ‘imperfection’ is not a “Disney thing”, I found that lack of risk-taking a bit of a disappointment.

The makers of the original “Beauty and the Beast” would I’m sure have been bowled over by the quality of the special effects on show here. However, that was in 1991 and it is now 2017, when “The Jungle Book” has set the bar for CGI effects. By today’s standards, the special effects here are mediocre at best. I wondered at first if some of the dodgy green-screen work was delivered that way to make it seem more “cartoony”, but I doubt that – – why bother? More irritatingly, the animated chattels in the castle, especially the candlestick Lumière, are seriously unconvincing. Mrs Potts, the teapot, and her son Chip, the cup, are rendered as flat and two-dimensional. There should have been no shortage of money to thrown at the effects with a reported budget of $160 million. Where has the Disney magic gone?
The film also seems to be rendered primarily for a 3D showing (I saw it in 2D). I say this because some of the panning shots (notably one around the library) to me just ended up as an unimpressive blur of mediocrity. Most odd.

The director is Bill Condon responsible for the modestly well-respected but low-key “Dreamgirls” and “Mr Holmes” but also the much derided “Breaking Dawn” end to the “Twilight” series. As such this seems to have been quite a risk that Disney took with such a high profile property, and I would have been intrigued to see what a more innovative director like Chazelle or Iñárritu would have done with it.
However, despite my reservations it is bound to be a MONSTER hit in every sense of the word, and kids aged 5 to 10 will, I predict, absolutely adore it (be warned that kids under 5 may be seriously scared by some of the darker scenes, especially the two wolf-attacks). For a younger age group, I would rate it as an easy FFFFF. As an adult viewer, given that I have viewed it through the rosy tint of my nostalgia-glasses (unfortunately you cannot hire these at the cinema if you haven’t brought your own!), this was an enjoyable watch. Despite my (more than expected!) slew of criticisms above my rating is still….