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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Flatliners (1990) in Movies

Sep 19, 2020

Flatliners (1990)

1990 | Drama, Mystery, Thriller

7.2

(36 Ratings)

Movie Rating

Stupid, to be sure (Kiefer Sutherland gets his ass kicked by a supernatural 8-year-old on multiple occasions) - and I do side with the critiques that this could have been a lot deeper, but this is still completely righteous. A ghostly, heavily portentous, lush modern day gothic-medical melodrama that came out in the 90s yet *screams* 1985 right down to the haircuts. Try to picture 𝘚𝘵. 𝘌𝘭𝘮𝘰'𝘴 𝘍𝘪𝘳𝘦 as a gen X YA horror flick. One of my all-time favorite film premises, and even Schumacher's (RIP) supporters I don't think give him enough credit for making all these interesting camp spectacles that - of all things - you can hardly say are unoriginal *nor* forgettable. A bunch of medical students chill out in an old cathedral thing which doubles as a medical lab where they perform clandestine death experiments on each other out in the open and argue about who can die the longest lmao, it's whoppingly silly stuff that thankfully takes itself dead (no pun intended) seriously. Pulpy, moody, atmospheric, and just looks extraordinary to boot - the visuals really tie that bind between our world and whatever lies beyond in an increasingly unstable way, as if some sort of constant (losing) struggle. So good that I actually even liked the infamous sentimental ending.

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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Magic in the Moonlight (2014) in Movies

Sep 20, 2020

Magic in the Moonlight (2014)

2014 | Comedy, Drama

4.5

(2 Ratings)

Movie Rating

𝘐𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘔𝘢𝘯. A movie that has no reason for existing, does virtually nothing more except over-explain the movie to you - leaving nothing else behind to chew on. Not just slight but good *Lord* is it ever drab. Yet another Woody Allen film where Stone falls for an unlikable, pompous asshole who thinks he's genius because he tells everyone else they're stupid and recites the same misanthropic bullshit you can find on those awful pre-commentary videos on YouTube from 2013 - except in this one he never perks up and the plot forgets to happen. And that's all not to mention how this is easily nu-Allen's crummiest looking movie. Has a few good moments, Stone is dependably sterling, and it's got a hell of a twist/reveal - but can this guy quit taking beyond excellent premises and spinning them into mostly wack fluff? Granted this is the first of his films I've disliked, but he's toed the line more times than once. The Firth dialogue is near as insufferable and amateurish as Allen has been - real thesaurus abuse going on. Starts off agreeable but soon after becomes a hell of a bore, pretty sure I checked out of 18 of the last 20 minutes.

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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated The Final Destination (2009) in Movies

Oct 22, 2020

Rigorously uncared for - chock full of series-worst dirt acting, bullshit writing, and some of the lamest CGI you'll ever encounter in a studio picture this millennium. All-around just pathetic, has an unshakable sense that this was rushed and indifferently shat out beyond belief... however... it's also only 82 minutes including credits and is quite possibly the most playful one until this point in wringing the tension out of the deaths where - outside of the eyesore opening premonition (two in a row so far for the series) - there isn't even a semi-weak one to speak of. Swift, vicious, full of trashy spills, and has Mykelti Williamson - truthfully this would be a great time if anyone involved actually gave a shit about it and it didn't come out in that 2-3 year period where everyone thought 2004-looking F-tier 3D which no question ranks among one of the worst trends in cinema was the best thing ever. The racist being dragged down the street is not only a top 20 franchise demise, but actually lands more effectively now than it ever did. Fair enough. Glad they followed up this planned series ender ( l m f a o ) with an actual movie, though.

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LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated 47 Ronin (2013) in Movies

Jan 12, 2021 (Updated Jul 4, 2021)

47 Ronin (2013)

2013 | Action, Drama, Sci-Fi

6.5

(17 Ratings)

Movie Rating

As expected this is a lot of eye-popping visual work in service of a story void of even a single drop of weight. Too much gorgeous design fetish on display to truly dislike in spite of it being executed as plainly as can be otherwise - for every mechanical, generic expository beat there's a splashpad of stunning locales, vibrant costumes, luscious CGI, sweeping sets, excellent props, and fully realized art backing it up. It's super atmospheric and the money is *definitely* on the screen but everything underneath the hood is not only lackluster but genuinely problematic. The idea to take one of the most legendary events in Japanese history and not only turn it into another passive whitewashed popcorn flick is gross all on its own, but to frame the entire thing around a bunch of wronged Japanese men + women having to constantly praise and apologize to a white man for bullying him or whatever is - quite frankly - beyond insulting. As much as I won't soon be forgetting the pop aesthetic experience this delivered upon, I'm also glad it bombed. A screenplay this goofy has no right being so tame. And see the skull guy on the poster? He's only in the movie for like 30 seconds so fuck you.

Kudos

LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Swallow (2019) in Movies

Jan 13, 2021 (Updated Jan 13, 2021)

Swallow (2019)

2019 | Drama

9.0

(2 Ratings)

Movie Rating

To be fair, I'd rather swallow a screwdriver than hang out with rich white people too. Gorgeous, nasty, and mean - but never disrespectful. Medically accurate? Perhaps not, but these seldom ever are anyhow so what can you do? In fact I found this to be much more compelling and satisfying as a depiction of obnoxious old-money business whities having their perfect little synthetic image destroyed by people who refuse to shape themselves around it than a portrait of pica. As everyone has already pointed out, Austin Stowell and in particular Haley Bennett are just astounding - easily not only her best performance to date, but the type of galvanizing role that should propel her star-power vastly beyond just Jennifer Lawrence comparisons considering that this is way better work than anything J-Law has done in years anyhow (excluding 𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳! [I'm a simp for stupid, manic arthouse cinema I know you don't have to tell me]). Deeply, deeply, *deeply* unsettling - can pleasantly report that its reputation is as airtight as claimed. Super messy but I think that gives it more character tbh, and what an excellent use of music. A bit too on-the-nose at times but also the type of movie that's destined to be misinterpreted by morons everywhere.

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BackToTheMovies (56 KP) rated Triple Threat (2019) in Movies

Jun 26, 2019

Triple Threat (2019)

2019 | Action, Thriller

6.4

(5 Ratings)

Movie Rating Watch

Triple Threat, from prolific action specialist Jesse V. Johnson and currently streaming on Netflix, is exactly as promised – 95 minutes of complete ass-kicking from a ridiculous cast of ass-kickers who defy gravitational and physical logic with their supreme martial arts and combat skills. Unpretentious, unrelenting, and wildly entertaining, this is a throwback to old-school, non-CGI, action-programmers where the body count is absurdly high, the squibs are going off like crazy, and dynamic second unit work pumps up the aesthetic thrills – it’s the best pure-action film of the year and the best of its type that I’ve seen since The Night Comes For Us (also on Netflix streaming).

Starring an action fan’s dream team of Iko Uwais, Scott Adkins, Michael Jai White, Tony Jaa, and Tiger Chen. The various beat-downs that these guys dish out look beyond lethal. I loved the real-deal explosions and Jonathan Hall’s slick and steady cinematography which highlighted the insane choreography. Matthew Lorentz’s crisp editing wastes not a moment of the basic but hard-charging script by Joey O’Bryan, Fangjin Song, and Paul Staheli. But let’s be honest, we’re not here to experience Shakespearean-level swaths of dialogue. Triple Threat exists as an outlet for extreme thrills and near-constant mayhem.