Search
Search results
Gareth von Kallenbach (980 KP) rated The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (2005) in Movies
Aug 14, 2019
Making films from books has always been a tricky proposition. For every film adaptation that hits it big such as Jaws, Lord of the Rings and The Silence of the Lambs, there are several that fail to work or are downright disasters such as The Bonfire of the Vanities.
In the film The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the late Douglas Adams first book in his classic series has finally arrived on the big screen after many delays getting started and a successful version on PBS.
The film stars Martin Freeman as Arthur Dent, a simple, easy going fellow whose entire goal in life is to stop the demolition of his beloved home from those who want to put a new highway in its current location.
As Arthur attempts to block the demolition, his good friend Ford Prefect (Mos Def), arrives and stalls the demolition with free beer for the work crew. Thinking he has been saved, Arthur is puzzled when Ford takes him to a local pub and buys rounds for the entire pub, saying the world is ending in a few minutes.
Ford in reality is an alien visiting the Earth and learns that the Earth is about to be destroyed to make way for a new galactic expressway. Before he knows what has happened, Arthur is whisked away seconds before the destruction of the Earth by Ford as they end up on a ship of the demolition fleet.
After a series of bizarre events and a narrow escape, Ford and Arthur end up on a passing ship that has been stolen by galactic president Zaphod Beeblebrox (Sam Rockwell), and Trillian (Zooey Deschanel), who just happens to be the lady of Arthur’s dreams and who is also unaware that the Earth has been destroyed in the short amount of time since she left Earth to explore with Zaphod.
As if this was not enough, the ship also has a depressed android named Marvin (Warwick Davis and voiced by Allan Rickman).
It is at this point that the film goes horribly wrong as the amusing and interesting setup quickly goes nowhere. While the crew is sent on a series of quests, each becomes less interesting than the one before it, and the very bland production values of the film are exposed. The sets are very basic and look as if they were borrowed from many of the budget driven British Sci-Fi that frequents PBS. Somehow the idea of an alien room being nothing but a rusty wall and a slapped up sign just does not cut it for me. At times I thought I was watching a home video production done by fans or another late night B movie rather than a major studio summer release.
As bad as the sets were what is even more amazing was the at times laughable attempts at visual effects where it was obvious that the actors were standing in front of screens as the matting lines were visible.
I tried to put a lot of this off to the idea that the film was trying to be quirky in keeping with the book, but quirky is not an excuse for underwhelming effects, basic sets, and lousy costuming and make up effects as I half expected to see zippers on the costumes of many aliens that looked like they were cobbled from parts at a hardware store.
So now that I have covered my issues with the look of the film, let’s look at the story itself. In a word: boring. I could not believe how dull and lazy the film became, and how the staff seemed to be going through the motions. The cast has zero chemistry and Rockwell is so frantic that his character is annoying to watch. After five minutes of his rock star in the spotlight style shtick, I wanted to strangle the character or at least get him on some serious medication.
Director Garth Jennings also has many scenes that simply go nowhere or drag on only to cut at odd times resulting in a complete and utter lack of pacing.
I am a big fan of the book series and I had very high hopes for this film. Sadly the disaster that resulted may very well have Douglas Adams spinning in his grave as his classic work was destroyed. I have to wonder how much of his original draft for the script that was used as the basis for the film survived.
While extreme die hard fans may enjoy the film, even they are likely to be disappointed and I can only hope that if they try to make the next book in the series, “The Restaurant at the End of the Universe”, they do a much better job then this effort, as this is one awful film adaptation.
In the film The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the late Douglas Adams first book in his classic series has finally arrived on the big screen after many delays getting started and a successful version on PBS.
The film stars Martin Freeman as Arthur Dent, a simple, easy going fellow whose entire goal in life is to stop the demolition of his beloved home from those who want to put a new highway in its current location.
As Arthur attempts to block the demolition, his good friend Ford Prefect (Mos Def), arrives and stalls the demolition with free beer for the work crew. Thinking he has been saved, Arthur is puzzled when Ford takes him to a local pub and buys rounds for the entire pub, saying the world is ending in a few minutes.
Ford in reality is an alien visiting the Earth and learns that the Earth is about to be destroyed to make way for a new galactic expressway. Before he knows what has happened, Arthur is whisked away seconds before the destruction of the Earth by Ford as they end up on a ship of the demolition fleet.
After a series of bizarre events and a narrow escape, Ford and Arthur end up on a passing ship that has been stolen by galactic president Zaphod Beeblebrox (Sam Rockwell), and Trillian (Zooey Deschanel), who just happens to be the lady of Arthur’s dreams and who is also unaware that the Earth has been destroyed in the short amount of time since she left Earth to explore with Zaphod.
As if this was not enough, the ship also has a depressed android named Marvin (Warwick Davis and voiced by Allan Rickman).
It is at this point that the film goes horribly wrong as the amusing and interesting setup quickly goes nowhere. While the crew is sent on a series of quests, each becomes less interesting than the one before it, and the very bland production values of the film are exposed. The sets are very basic and look as if they were borrowed from many of the budget driven British Sci-Fi that frequents PBS. Somehow the idea of an alien room being nothing but a rusty wall and a slapped up sign just does not cut it for me. At times I thought I was watching a home video production done by fans or another late night B movie rather than a major studio summer release.
As bad as the sets were what is even more amazing was the at times laughable attempts at visual effects where it was obvious that the actors were standing in front of screens as the matting lines were visible.
I tried to put a lot of this off to the idea that the film was trying to be quirky in keeping with the book, but quirky is not an excuse for underwhelming effects, basic sets, and lousy costuming and make up effects as I half expected to see zippers on the costumes of many aliens that looked like they were cobbled from parts at a hardware store.
So now that I have covered my issues with the look of the film, let’s look at the story itself. In a word: boring. I could not believe how dull and lazy the film became, and how the staff seemed to be going through the motions. The cast has zero chemistry and Rockwell is so frantic that his character is annoying to watch. After five minutes of his rock star in the spotlight style shtick, I wanted to strangle the character or at least get him on some serious medication.
Director Garth Jennings also has many scenes that simply go nowhere or drag on only to cut at odd times resulting in a complete and utter lack of pacing.
I am a big fan of the book series and I had very high hopes for this film. Sadly the disaster that resulted may very well have Douglas Adams spinning in his grave as his classic work was destroyed. I have to wonder how much of his original draft for the script that was used as the basis for the film survived.
While extreme die hard fans may enjoy the film, even they are likely to be disappointed and I can only hope that if they try to make the next book in the series, “The Restaurant at the End of the Universe”, they do a much better job then this effort, as this is one awful film adaptation.
Emma @ The Movies (1786 KP) rated Five Feet Apart (2019) in Movies
Jun 22, 2019 (Updated Sep 25, 2019)
Firstly, I think it's nice to see a film partnering with a charity and bringing awareness to a wider audience. The advert for the charity before the film was a nice touch too.
Secondly, it appears that they shook the Disney tree hard for this one. Cole Sprouse and Moises Arias both had big roles on top Disney shows and Haley Lu Richardson appeared once in a show I've never heard of before.
Five Feet Apart opens really nicely with Stella and her friends. Everything is jolly old teen movie until they leave and Stella's demeanour changes. She isn't happy, her face is instantly one of resolve and sadness. The transformation of the room shows you everything that was hiding behind the camera, homely teen bedroom to sterile hospital room. It's a simple scene but it sets up Stella's character nicely.
This isn't a new tale, the idea is tried and tested over the years. A love story through the battle of illness is a guaranteed tearjerker, and this certainly delivered on that point.
Will's arrival at the hospital intrigues her almost instantly. He's the polar opposite of Stella, she has her reasons to battle through while Will is more for living for the moment, consequences be damned.
It's an enjoyable film, but the thing I think stands in the way for some people is the fact that we've never been in this sort of situation so everything seems farfetched. I can't imagine what it's like, but I can imagine emotions running high and recklessness coming from it. As an adult (ugh) I can't imagine putting my life in danger like the characters do, but I'm certain that teenage me would have done the same things... boy was she an idiot.
During the scene where Stella goes under general anaesthetic she's looking up at a drawing placed on the ceiling above her, as the drugs take hold the picture starts to come to life. It was a little whimsical for the film, but being that they use illustration in different areas it was a nice inclusion.
Stella's optimism and determination in the face of her CF is so strong and Haley Lu Richardson does a great job of dealing with the wide range of emotions that she cycles through. (Am I the only one who was getting Olivia Cooke vibes through this?)
The cheese to Stella's chalk is Will played by Cole Sprouse. Will is the fun-at-any-price sort of rebel so of course those two are perfect for each other. If I'm being brutally honest I always thought Cole Sprouse was the one that couldn't act. His performance in this has convinced me otherwise. As frustrating as I found Will's actions I thought he was an interesting character and that Sprouse brought him to life in a very believable way.
The pair make for a great lead couple, even if we are subjected to a rather condensed romance. I didn't really get much sense of how time flowed in this movie, it could be weeks, months, I couldn't tell. Due to the nature of their condition there's a necessary separation throughout the film and as you watch you wonder how they're going to deal with that when romances are traditionally full of closeness... I didn't think that something so simple could make me cry, but somehow there I was with tears rolling down my face. It was a bizarre idea but it worked really well visually even if it did get a little weird at one point.
At the end we ramp up fairly quickly and we see a swift change in our main characters. Emotions are so high that everything gets a little crazier. While the change in Stella didn't feel quite right to me, Will's change was a nice move and Sprouse's performance really showed the panic and reality behind the situation.
When we come to the conclusion of the film I could not have been more annoyed. If someone did that to me I think I'd punch their lights out, five feet rule or not.
Oh! And that five feet rule, you know, the one in the title of the film? We see it referred to early on and it's actually a six feet rule... that discrepancy annoyed me for longer than it probably should have done.
This might not be groundbreaking in its genre but it was an enjoyable watch. It gives you a different take on this popular medi-romance trend.
What you should do
If you like these devastating romances then this is definitely worth catching at some point.
Movie thing you wish you could take home
There's a lot of artistic talent flying around between the main characters and I'd love to pinch a little bit of that.
Secondly, it appears that they shook the Disney tree hard for this one. Cole Sprouse and Moises Arias both had big roles on top Disney shows and Haley Lu Richardson appeared once in a show I've never heard of before.
Five Feet Apart opens really nicely with Stella and her friends. Everything is jolly old teen movie until they leave and Stella's demeanour changes. She isn't happy, her face is instantly one of resolve and sadness. The transformation of the room shows you everything that was hiding behind the camera, homely teen bedroom to sterile hospital room. It's a simple scene but it sets up Stella's character nicely.
This isn't a new tale, the idea is tried and tested over the years. A love story through the battle of illness is a guaranteed tearjerker, and this certainly delivered on that point.
Will's arrival at the hospital intrigues her almost instantly. He's the polar opposite of Stella, she has her reasons to battle through while Will is more for living for the moment, consequences be damned.
It's an enjoyable film, but the thing I think stands in the way for some people is the fact that we've never been in this sort of situation so everything seems farfetched. I can't imagine what it's like, but I can imagine emotions running high and recklessness coming from it. As an adult (ugh) I can't imagine putting my life in danger like the characters do, but I'm certain that teenage me would have done the same things... boy was she an idiot.
During the scene where Stella goes under general anaesthetic she's looking up at a drawing placed on the ceiling above her, as the drugs take hold the picture starts to come to life. It was a little whimsical for the film, but being that they use illustration in different areas it was a nice inclusion.
Stella's optimism and determination in the face of her CF is so strong and Haley Lu Richardson does a great job of dealing with the wide range of emotions that she cycles through. (Am I the only one who was getting Olivia Cooke vibes through this?)
The cheese to Stella's chalk is Will played by Cole Sprouse. Will is the fun-at-any-price sort of rebel so of course those two are perfect for each other. If I'm being brutally honest I always thought Cole Sprouse was the one that couldn't act. His performance in this has convinced me otherwise. As frustrating as I found Will's actions I thought he was an interesting character and that Sprouse brought him to life in a very believable way.
The pair make for a great lead couple, even if we are subjected to a rather condensed romance. I didn't really get much sense of how time flowed in this movie, it could be weeks, months, I couldn't tell. Due to the nature of their condition there's a necessary separation throughout the film and as you watch you wonder how they're going to deal with that when romances are traditionally full of closeness... I didn't think that something so simple could make me cry, but somehow there I was with tears rolling down my face. It was a bizarre idea but it worked really well visually even if it did get a little weird at one point.
At the end we ramp up fairly quickly and we see a swift change in our main characters. Emotions are so high that everything gets a little crazier. While the change in Stella didn't feel quite right to me, Will's change was a nice move and Sprouse's performance really showed the panic and reality behind the situation.
When we come to the conclusion of the film I could not have been more annoyed. If someone did that to me I think I'd punch their lights out, five feet rule or not.
Oh! And that five feet rule, you know, the one in the title of the film? We see it referred to early on and it's actually a six feet rule... that discrepancy annoyed me for longer than it probably should have done.
This might not be groundbreaking in its genre but it was an enjoyable watch. It gives you a different take on this popular medi-romance trend.
What you should do
If you like these devastating romances then this is definitely worth catching at some point.
Movie thing you wish you could take home
There's a lot of artistic talent flying around between the main characters and I'd love to pinch a little bit of that.
Darren (1599 KP) rated Midsommar (2019) in Movies
Jul 4, 2019
Director: Ari Aster
Writer: Ari Aster (Screenplay)
Starring: Florence Pugh, Will Poulter, Jack Reynor, William Jackson Harper, Liv Mjones, Anna Astrom, Julia Ragnarsson
Plot: A couple travels to Sweden to visit a rural hometown's fabled mid-summer festival. What begins as an idyllic retreat quickly devolves into an increasingly violent and bizarre competition at the hands of a pagan cult.
Runtime: 2 Hours 20 Minutes
There may be spoilers in the rest of the review
Verdict: The Wicker Man on Acid
Story: Midsommar starts when young lady Dani (Pugh) has her family die suddenly, turning to the only person left in her life, her boyfriend Christian (Reynor) who has started to move away from their relationship. Christian and his friends Josh (Harper), Mark (Poulter) and Pelle (Blomgren) are planning a trip to Pelle’s home in Sweden for a special mid-summer festival.
Christian trying to do the right thing for Dani, invites her along, but it isn’t long before the festival turns into a cultural nightmare for the outsiders who have never seen the customs before.
Thoughts on Midsommar
Characters – Dani is a young lady that has suffered a heart-breaking tragedy in her life, leaving her along in the world, struggle to get over the loss of her family, she is unsure about her relationship with her boyfriend and agrees to go with him on the trip to Sweden. Dani is trying her best to get on with her life, which is seeing her have the good and bad days, while on the commune she starts to relax more in life. Christian is the student boyfriend of Dani, he is starting to question the relationship about to end it before the tragedy strikes, he invites her believing she won’t go, while also hoping to find out whether they should stay together. Josh is a student friend of Christian, who has been working on his paper on different cultures, he sees this event a major part of his studies, only he doesn’t seem to respect enough cultures. Mark is the comic relief, he wants to go to Sweden to meet women, he is quick to turn to drink or drugs, while always putting his foot in it.
Performances – Florence Pugh is the star of the show, she does show the grief required in her role, which shows us how hard to is finding life. Jack Reynor has finished turning his career around after Transformers, with one that must make people take him seriously now. Will Poulter will make you laugh with nearly everything he says, while William Jackson Harper will make you dislike his characters arrogance quickly.
Story – The story here follows a young woman dealing with grief of losing her family, trying to get away from her past by getting away from the world with the festival which soon sees her trapped with her friends with a cult that has strict rules. Much like Hereditary, we are tackling grief on a personal level, unlike Hereditary we find ourselves not seeing a timeline to make us understand the recover process that Dani is trying to go through. The story does have a huge problem for me though, is that this is a story which the people should just walk or run away after seeing the first major incident, not just calmly say ‘sure this is a different culture we should see what happens next’ this is easily one of the biggest let down in any horror. We also do spend way too much time just turning to drugs as an excuse rather than trying to solve the real problems and the students just being arrogant not seemingly wanting to do anything with their lives.
Horror/Mystery – The horror in this film comes from graphic imaginary that we see from the injuries, we do have tension growing and the make up team should be praised for just how real everything looks. The mystery comes from just what is happening with this cult and what they will do next.
Settings – The film is set in the Swedish countryside away from the world, the only type of place a cult could operate in around the modern day. The sets are the best thing about this film because they are crafted which such love and you can’t help but think everything you see is a clue to what is happening.
Special Effects – The effects in the film do bring us the graphic images of the injuries that people are going through. The make up team work wonders on this film.
Scene of the Movie – Dancing.
That Moment That Annoyed Me – Just using drugs to explain why these people are friends.
Final Thoughts – This is a horror that is set and created wonderfully on the outside, only to fall short on the story which only drags along without reaching any levels of scares.
Overall: Not reaching the potential.
Rating
Writer: Ari Aster (Screenplay)
Starring: Florence Pugh, Will Poulter, Jack Reynor, William Jackson Harper, Liv Mjones, Anna Astrom, Julia Ragnarsson
Plot: A couple travels to Sweden to visit a rural hometown's fabled mid-summer festival. What begins as an idyllic retreat quickly devolves into an increasingly violent and bizarre competition at the hands of a pagan cult.
Runtime: 2 Hours 20 Minutes
There may be spoilers in the rest of the review
Verdict: The Wicker Man on Acid
Story: Midsommar starts when young lady Dani (Pugh) has her family die suddenly, turning to the only person left in her life, her boyfriend Christian (Reynor) who has started to move away from their relationship. Christian and his friends Josh (Harper), Mark (Poulter) and Pelle (Blomgren) are planning a trip to Pelle’s home in Sweden for a special mid-summer festival.
Christian trying to do the right thing for Dani, invites her along, but it isn’t long before the festival turns into a cultural nightmare for the outsiders who have never seen the customs before.
Thoughts on Midsommar
Characters – Dani is a young lady that has suffered a heart-breaking tragedy in her life, leaving her along in the world, struggle to get over the loss of her family, she is unsure about her relationship with her boyfriend and agrees to go with him on the trip to Sweden. Dani is trying her best to get on with her life, which is seeing her have the good and bad days, while on the commune she starts to relax more in life. Christian is the student boyfriend of Dani, he is starting to question the relationship about to end it before the tragedy strikes, he invites her believing she won’t go, while also hoping to find out whether they should stay together. Josh is a student friend of Christian, who has been working on his paper on different cultures, he sees this event a major part of his studies, only he doesn’t seem to respect enough cultures. Mark is the comic relief, he wants to go to Sweden to meet women, he is quick to turn to drink or drugs, while always putting his foot in it.
Performances – Florence Pugh is the star of the show, she does show the grief required in her role, which shows us how hard to is finding life. Jack Reynor has finished turning his career around after Transformers, with one that must make people take him seriously now. Will Poulter will make you laugh with nearly everything he says, while William Jackson Harper will make you dislike his characters arrogance quickly.
Story – The story here follows a young woman dealing with grief of losing her family, trying to get away from her past by getting away from the world with the festival which soon sees her trapped with her friends with a cult that has strict rules. Much like Hereditary, we are tackling grief on a personal level, unlike Hereditary we find ourselves not seeing a timeline to make us understand the recover process that Dani is trying to go through. The story does have a huge problem for me though, is that this is a story which the people should just walk or run away after seeing the first major incident, not just calmly say ‘sure this is a different culture we should see what happens next’ this is easily one of the biggest let down in any horror. We also do spend way too much time just turning to drugs as an excuse rather than trying to solve the real problems and the students just being arrogant not seemingly wanting to do anything with their lives.
Horror/Mystery – The horror in this film comes from graphic imaginary that we see from the injuries, we do have tension growing and the make up team should be praised for just how real everything looks. The mystery comes from just what is happening with this cult and what they will do next.
Settings – The film is set in the Swedish countryside away from the world, the only type of place a cult could operate in around the modern day. The sets are the best thing about this film because they are crafted which such love and you can’t help but think everything you see is a clue to what is happening.
Special Effects – The effects in the film do bring us the graphic images of the injuries that people are going through. The make up team work wonders on this film.
Scene of the Movie – Dancing.
That Moment That Annoyed Me – Just using drugs to explain why these people are friends.
Final Thoughts – This is a horror that is set and created wonderfully on the outside, only to fall short on the story which only drags along without reaching any levels of scares.
Overall: Not reaching the potential.
Rating
Bob Mann (459 KP) rated Cold Pursuit (2019) in Movies
Mar 15, 2020
Comments on revenge are best kept on the screen.
I'd completely forgotten the furore about Liam Neeson's comments back last February during the press-tour preceding the film's release. In discussing the destructive feelings of revenge experienced by his character, Nels Coxman, Neeson revealed something he did 40 years ago: after the rape of a friend by "a black man", Neeson went out on the streets to find another "black man" and do them harm. (As a fellow Ballymena-born man, David Moody (from the "Mark and Dave" blog) has an interesting theory about this... that it was not a "rascist" statement in the true sense, but something else entirely. See here - ).
The comments undoubtedly impacted the movie at the box office. Which is a shame. Because in his catalogue of bonkers and violent revenge-porn flicks, this is one of Neeson's more entertaining ones.
Revenge is a dish best served cold. And where colder to serve it than in the ski-resort of Kehoe where Nels Coxman is the local snowplow operative and "man of the year" for his services to the community. But the tracks are about to fall off his orderly life. For his son Kyle (Micheál Richardson) winds up dead through a drugs overdose and his strained marriage with wife Grace (Laura Dern) disintegrates. (One of the most cutting and best-written "Bye" notes ever seen in the movies).
With revenge in mind, Coxman pursues the Denver-based drugs lord Trevor Calcote (Tom Bateman) who dished out the drugs to his son. But he inadvertently manages to stay just below the parapet as he sets in train a gang war between Calcote and a Kehoe-based native-American drugs gang led by White Bull (Tom Jackson). The snow turned progressively pinker as the body count rises.
Calcote (aka "Viking") is painted as a colourful family man, with an annoyingly bright son Ryan (Nicholas Holmes) that he controls with a rod of iron. Viking is estranged from wife Aya (Julia Jones), who seems completely unafraid of him and happily embarrasses him in front of his men. This relationship never really works. Since given all the terrible and irrational things Viking does to people, whether they obstruct him or help him in equal measure, putting a quiet bullet into Aya's head seems to be to least he could do!
Where there is fun to be had is in the "Stockholm syndrome" linkage between young Ryan and Coxman. When his father insists on controlling his diet, feeding him the same insipidly healthy meals morning, noon and night, the alternative of being kidnapped and fed burgers seems eminently more preferable!
The film is at times really difficult to follow. There are lots of inexplicable leaps of logic and really inexplicably bonkers scenes that you can only patch together later. It's as if the filmmakers randomly filmed 5 hours of footage and then tried to edit it all into a cohesive plot!
As one example of this, the relationship between Coxman and "Wingman" (William Forsythe) was poorly introduced such that I was left baffled by a later plot twist.
In another scene, Neeson smashes the head of enforcer "Santa" (Michael Adamthwaite) into his steering wheel, but in the next scene collapses with him utterly exhausted in the snow. There was clearly a significant fight here that was cut out of the finished cut. But as a result the final cut makes no sense at all!
Of course, the local law enforcement team are average at best. Average because although young and keen-as-mustard detective Kim Dash (Emmy Rossum) is hot on the trail of the truth, her partner Gip (John Doman) is f*ckin' useless... wanting to do nothing but drink coffee and eat donuts in true Simpsons style.
Normally with these sort of films, it's difficult to keep track of the body count. No such problem here. Every death is celebrated with a tombstone graphic so it's easy to keep count! Needless to say, there are a lot of tombstones registered.
Directed by Norwegian Hans Petter Moland, it's all good violent cartoonish fun, that keeps its tongue firmly in its cheek for most of the running time. The snowy setting, the partly native-American cast and the presence of Julia Jones brings to mind the truly excellent Jeremy Renner / Elizabeth Olsen movie "Wind River". But there the similarities (and quality levels) definitely stop. It's not a clever movie; it's borderline bonkers for most of its running time (never more so than with a totally bizarre "joke" final shot); but it is entertaining. As a 'park brain at door' action comedy it just about makes the grade.
(For the full graphical review, please check out One Mann's Movies here - https://bob-the-movie-man.com/2020/03/15/one-manns-movies-dvd-review-cold-pursuit-2019/. Thanks.)
The comments undoubtedly impacted the movie at the box office. Which is a shame. Because in his catalogue of bonkers and violent revenge-porn flicks, this is one of Neeson's more entertaining ones.
Revenge is a dish best served cold. And where colder to serve it than in the ski-resort of Kehoe where Nels Coxman is the local snowplow operative and "man of the year" for his services to the community. But the tracks are about to fall off his orderly life. For his son Kyle (Micheál Richardson) winds up dead through a drugs overdose and his strained marriage with wife Grace (Laura Dern) disintegrates. (One of the most cutting and best-written "Bye" notes ever seen in the movies).
With revenge in mind, Coxman pursues the Denver-based drugs lord Trevor Calcote (Tom Bateman) who dished out the drugs to his son. But he inadvertently manages to stay just below the parapet as he sets in train a gang war between Calcote and a Kehoe-based native-American drugs gang led by White Bull (Tom Jackson). The snow turned progressively pinker as the body count rises.
Calcote (aka "Viking") is painted as a colourful family man, with an annoyingly bright son Ryan (Nicholas Holmes) that he controls with a rod of iron. Viking is estranged from wife Aya (Julia Jones), who seems completely unafraid of him and happily embarrasses him in front of his men. This relationship never really works. Since given all the terrible and irrational things Viking does to people, whether they obstruct him or help him in equal measure, putting a quiet bullet into Aya's head seems to be to least he could do!
Where there is fun to be had is in the "Stockholm syndrome" linkage between young Ryan and Coxman. When his father insists on controlling his diet, feeding him the same insipidly healthy meals morning, noon and night, the alternative of being kidnapped and fed burgers seems eminently more preferable!
The film is at times really difficult to follow. There are lots of inexplicable leaps of logic and really inexplicably bonkers scenes that you can only patch together later. It's as if the filmmakers randomly filmed 5 hours of footage and then tried to edit it all into a cohesive plot!
As one example of this, the relationship between Coxman and "Wingman" (William Forsythe) was poorly introduced such that I was left baffled by a later plot twist.
In another scene, Neeson smashes the head of enforcer "Santa" (Michael Adamthwaite) into his steering wheel, but in the next scene collapses with him utterly exhausted in the snow. There was clearly a significant fight here that was cut out of the finished cut. But as a result the final cut makes no sense at all!
Of course, the local law enforcement team are average at best. Average because although young and keen-as-mustard detective Kim Dash (Emmy Rossum) is hot on the trail of the truth, her partner Gip (John Doman) is f*ckin' useless... wanting to do nothing but drink coffee and eat donuts in true Simpsons style.
Normally with these sort of films, it's difficult to keep track of the body count. No such problem here. Every death is celebrated with a tombstone graphic so it's easy to keep count! Needless to say, there are a lot of tombstones registered.
Directed by Norwegian Hans Petter Moland, it's all good violent cartoonish fun, that keeps its tongue firmly in its cheek for most of the running time. The snowy setting, the partly native-American cast and the presence of Julia Jones brings to mind the truly excellent Jeremy Renner / Elizabeth Olsen movie "Wind River". But there the similarities (and quality levels) definitely stop. It's not a clever movie; it's borderline bonkers for most of its running time (never more so than with a totally bizarre "joke" final shot); but it is entertaining. As a 'park brain at door' action comedy it just about makes the grade.
(For the full graphical review, please check out One Mann's Movies here - https://bob-the-movie-man.com/2020/03/15/one-manns-movies-dvd-review-cold-pursuit-2019/. Thanks.)
Bob Mann (459 KP) rated Fantastic Beasts: Crimes of Grindelwald (2018) in Movies
Sep 28, 2021
Lestranger than fiction.
I must be one of the last people to watch this in the cinema, thanks to an irritating bout of sickness and – well – frankly total bloody apathy! For me this is the franchise that nobody asked for and nobody wanted. (Well, “nobody” is probably overstating the case, since there is probably a bunch of Potterheads out there who are shouting at me right now). But judging from the opinion of my daughter-in-law, who could win “Mastermind” with her knowledge of the original Potter series as her specialist subject, I am certainly not alone in my lack of enthusiasm.
The Plot
I’d really love to tell you about the plot. I really would! But I would struggle to pull all the multitude of strands together from J.K. Rowling’s story and coherently explain them to anyone. If Rowling had put ten thousand monkeys (not a million – it’s no bloody Shakespeare) into a room with typewriters and locked the door I wouldn’t be surprised.
Let me try at a high level….. The arch-criminal wizard Grindelwald (Johnny Depp) is being tortured in ‘Trump Tower’, but manages to escape and flees to Paris in pursuit of a mysterious circus performer called Credence (Ezra Miller) and his bewitched companion Nagini (nudge, nudge, wink, wink) played fetchingly by Claudia Kim. Someone needs to stop him, and all eyes are on Albus Dumbledore (Jude Law). But he is unable to do so, since he and Grindelwald are “closer than brothers” (nudge, nudge, wink, wink). So a reluctant and UK-grounded Newt Scamander (Eddie Redmayne) is smuggled into the danger zone… which suits him just fine since his love Tina (Katherine Waterston) is working for the ministry there, and the couple are currently estranged due to a (topical) bout of ‘Fake News’.
Throw in a potential love triangle between Newt, his brother Theseus (Callum Turner) and old Hogwart’s schoolmate Leta Lestrange (Zoë Kravitz) and about a half dozen other sub-plots and you have… well… a complete bugger’s muggle – – sorry – – muddle.
A plot that’s all at sea
Above all, I really can’t explain the crux of the plot. A venerable diarrhoea of exposition in a crypt, during an inexplicably quiet fifteen minutes (given ‘im-who-can-be-named is next door with about a thousand other people!) left me completely bewildered. A bizarre event at sea (no spoilers) would seem to make absolutely NO SENSE when considered with another reveal at the end of the film. I thought I must have clearly missed something… or I’d just not been intelligent enough to process the information…. or…. it was actually completely bonkers! Actually, I think it’s the latter: in desperation I went on a fan site that tried to explain the plot. While it was explained there, the explanation aligned with what I thought had happened: but it made no mention of the ridiculousness of the random coincidence involved!
The turns
The film’s a mess. Which is a shame since everyone involved tries really hard. Depp oozes evil very effectively (he proves that nicely on arriving in Paris, and doubles-down about 5 minutes later: #veryverydark). Redmayne replays his Newt-act effectively but once again (and I see I made the same comments in my “Fantastic Beasts” review) his character mumbles again so much that many of his lines are unintelligible.
I also complained last time that the excellent actress Katherine Waterston was criminally underused as the tentative love interest Tina. this trend unfortunately continues unabated in this film…. you’ll struggle afterwards to write down what she actually did in this film.
Jacob (Dan Fogler) and Queenie (Alison Sudol, looking for all the world in some scenes like Rachel Weisz) reprise their roles in a sub-plot that goes nowhere in particular.
Of the newcomers, Jude Law as Dumbledore is a class-act but has very little screen time: hopefully he will get more to do next time around. Zoë Kravitz impresses as Leta.
Wizards of the screen
As you would expect from a David Yates / David Heyman Potter collaboration, the product design, costume design and special effects are all excellent. Some scenes are truly impressive – an ‘explosion’ in a Parisian garret is particularly spectacular.
But special effects alone do not a great film make. Many reviews I’ve seen complain that this was a ‘filler’ film… a set-up film for the rest of the series. And I can understand that view. If you analyse the film overall, virtually NOTHING of importance actually happens: it’s like the “Order of the Phoenix” of the prequels.
Final Thoughts
I dragged myself along to see this one because “I thought I should”. The third in the series will really need to sparkle to make me want to see it. If J.K. Rowling were to take me advice (she won’t – she NEVER returns my calls!) then she would sculpt the story-arc but leave the screenwriting to someone better. The blame for this one, I’m afraid, lies at Rowling’s door alone.
The Plot
I’d really love to tell you about the plot. I really would! But I would struggle to pull all the multitude of strands together from J.K. Rowling’s story and coherently explain them to anyone. If Rowling had put ten thousand monkeys (not a million – it’s no bloody Shakespeare) into a room with typewriters and locked the door I wouldn’t be surprised.
Let me try at a high level….. The arch-criminal wizard Grindelwald (Johnny Depp) is being tortured in ‘Trump Tower’, but manages to escape and flees to Paris in pursuit of a mysterious circus performer called Credence (Ezra Miller) and his bewitched companion Nagini (nudge, nudge, wink, wink) played fetchingly by Claudia Kim. Someone needs to stop him, and all eyes are on Albus Dumbledore (Jude Law). But he is unable to do so, since he and Grindelwald are “closer than brothers” (nudge, nudge, wink, wink). So a reluctant and UK-grounded Newt Scamander (Eddie Redmayne) is smuggled into the danger zone… which suits him just fine since his love Tina (Katherine Waterston) is working for the ministry there, and the couple are currently estranged due to a (topical) bout of ‘Fake News’.
Throw in a potential love triangle between Newt, his brother Theseus (Callum Turner) and old Hogwart’s schoolmate Leta Lestrange (Zoë Kravitz) and about a half dozen other sub-plots and you have… well… a complete bugger’s muggle – – sorry – – muddle.
A plot that’s all at sea
Above all, I really can’t explain the crux of the plot. A venerable diarrhoea of exposition in a crypt, during an inexplicably quiet fifteen minutes (given ‘im-who-can-be-named is next door with about a thousand other people!) left me completely bewildered. A bizarre event at sea (no spoilers) would seem to make absolutely NO SENSE when considered with another reveal at the end of the film. I thought I must have clearly missed something… or I’d just not been intelligent enough to process the information…. or…. it was actually completely bonkers! Actually, I think it’s the latter: in desperation I went on a fan site that tried to explain the plot. While it was explained there, the explanation aligned with what I thought had happened: but it made no mention of the ridiculousness of the random coincidence involved!
The turns
The film’s a mess. Which is a shame since everyone involved tries really hard. Depp oozes evil very effectively (he proves that nicely on arriving in Paris, and doubles-down about 5 minutes later: #veryverydark). Redmayne replays his Newt-act effectively but once again (and I see I made the same comments in my “Fantastic Beasts” review) his character mumbles again so much that many of his lines are unintelligible.
I also complained last time that the excellent actress Katherine Waterston was criminally underused as the tentative love interest Tina. this trend unfortunately continues unabated in this film…. you’ll struggle afterwards to write down what she actually did in this film.
Jacob (Dan Fogler) and Queenie (Alison Sudol, looking for all the world in some scenes like Rachel Weisz) reprise their roles in a sub-plot that goes nowhere in particular.
Of the newcomers, Jude Law as Dumbledore is a class-act but has very little screen time: hopefully he will get more to do next time around. Zoë Kravitz impresses as Leta.
Wizards of the screen
As you would expect from a David Yates / David Heyman Potter collaboration, the product design, costume design and special effects are all excellent. Some scenes are truly impressive – an ‘explosion’ in a Parisian garret is particularly spectacular.
But special effects alone do not a great film make. Many reviews I’ve seen complain that this was a ‘filler’ film… a set-up film for the rest of the series. And I can understand that view. If you analyse the film overall, virtually NOTHING of importance actually happens: it’s like the “Order of the Phoenix” of the prequels.
Final Thoughts
I dragged myself along to see this one because “I thought I should”. The third in the series will really need to sparkle to make me want to see it. If J.K. Rowling were to take me advice (she won’t – she NEVER returns my calls!) then she would sculpt the story-arc but leave the screenwriting to someone better. The blame for this one, I’m afraid, lies at Rowling’s door alone.
Bob Mann (459 KP) rated The Hitman's Bodyguard (2017) in Movies
Sep 29, 2021
A plethora of clichés.
2017’s summer blockbusters fizzle to a halt with this formulaic action comedy. Ryan Reynolds (“Deadpool“) plays Michael Bryce: a cocksure “Triple A rated” bodyguard, always planning three steps ahead so that he can protect his clients without killing anyone in the process. With such arrogance, a fall is inevitable. On the other side of the legal scales is Darius Kincaid (Samuel L Jackson, “The Hateful Eight“), a contract killer who always gets his man. But the incarcerated Kincaid is offered a deal to release his equally incarcerated wife Sonia (Selma Hayek) in return for testifying against the fearsome Belarus president Vladislav Dukhovich (Gary Oldman, “Dawn of the Planet of the Apes”), on trial for war crimes at The Hague. An Interpol team led by Bryce’s’s ex-squeeze Amelia Roussel (the striking Elodie Yung) now have to get Kincaid to Belgium unscathed with Dukhovich’s well-trained and well-armed thugs stopping at nothing to ensure he won’t be there to testify. Fate transpires that Bryce and Kincaid become an unlikely team in trying to bring Dukhovich to justice.
After losing your no claims bonus, hysterical laughter is the only way forwards. Ryan Reynolds and Samuel L Jackson.
This is a movie whose script seems to have been glued together from a patchwork of other movie scenes:
– the bad guy / bad guy partner relationship of “The Nice Guys“. Check.
– the street ambush of “Clear and Present Danger”. Check.
– the Amsterdam boat chase of “Puppet on a Chain”. Check.
– the comedic bar-room brawl from “Airplane”. Check.
Many of the action scenes are done with panache and some great stunt work. But it’s all stuff we’ve seen countless times before, so what is needed for differentiation is the relationships between Bryce and Kincaid: this needs to be the cornerstone of the film. But it just doesn’t quite work. Jackson’s contribution is never in doubt, even though we’ve seen this motherf-ing shtick countless times before: he’s still magnetic, charismatic and a joy to watch. But unfortunately Reynolds just doesn’t deliver the acting goods to make the banter believable: there is a reason “Deadpool” is his best film – he wears a mask for most of it! His ‘puppy-dog look’ gets rolled out multiple times, but it’s unconvincing in the extreme. Together they are no match for Gosling/Crowe in “The Nice Guys“.
Nun but the brave. Jackson (if not Reynolds) get happy clappy.
On firmer ground is the quirky relationship between Mr and Mrs Kincaid. Although sharing limited screen time together, Hayek and Jackson spark off each other wonderfully. Seeing Selma Hayek in uncharacteristically sweary and belligerent mode was highly entertaining (although it’s worth commenting that my wife took great offence to the ‘comic’ bullying of an overweight cellmate).
“I had to ask the guy next to me to pinch me to make sure I wasn’t dreaming” – the future Mr and Mrs Kincaid meet in a rough place… the seediest dive on the wharf.
Elsewhere in the acting roll call, Elodie Yung delivers just the right measure of cuteness, toughness and passion as Roussel, but Oldman delivers a full-on retread of his Ivan “Get off my plane” Korshunov from “Air Force One”. There is also a change to Oldman’s character’s face at the end of the film in the form of a rampant skin complaint which is ‘explained’ by a clumsily inserted news item about an “attempted poisoning”: it’s such a clunky and bizarre addition to the script that it made me wonder whether the actor has some unexpected ailment (like shingles) during filming…. but I can see nothing related to this online.
The striking Elodie Yung as the Interpol agent Roussel.
The screenplay by relative newcomer Tom O’Connor bumps along from implausible action scene to implausible action scene, with more that its fair share of ‘WTF’ moments. For example, after a random chase through multiple Amsterdam alleys and shops, Jackson pulls up outside the very DIY shop Reynolds ends up in to pick him up! The script is also tonally uneven throughout: given this is supposed to be an “action comedy” the action is often brutal and unpleasant and the comedy – in the main – just not funny enough. (About the funniest thing in the film are the most ineffective sub machine guns known to man, most notably in the mildly ludicrous, if well staged, boat chase scene!)
An entertaining cameo from Richard E Grant as a businessman in danger.
The film also manages to offend, in more ways than the 15-rated violence and language used: I’m not sure WHEN this movie was actually filmed, but the use of an articulated lorry as a terrorist weapon towards the end of the film is certainly in very poor taste after the events of Nice, London and Barcelona. Not appreciated.
Directed by Patrick Hughes (“The Expendables 3″…. say no more) this hodge-podge of a flick is sporadically entertaining, but is one I will struggle to remember in a couple of months time.
After losing your no claims bonus, hysterical laughter is the only way forwards. Ryan Reynolds and Samuel L Jackson.
This is a movie whose script seems to have been glued together from a patchwork of other movie scenes:
– the bad guy / bad guy partner relationship of “The Nice Guys“. Check.
– the street ambush of “Clear and Present Danger”. Check.
– the Amsterdam boat chase of “Puppet on a Chain”. Check.
– the comedic bar-room brawl from “Airplane”. Check.
Many of the action scenes are done with panache and some great stunt work. But it’s all stuff we’ve seen countless times before, so what is needed for differentiation is the relationships between Bryce and Kincaid: this needs to be the cornerstone of the film. But it just doesn’t quite work. Jackson’s contribution is never in doubt, even though we’ve seen this motherf-ing shtick countless times before: he’s still magnetic, charismatic and a joy to watch. But unfortunately Reynolds just doesn’t deliver the acting goods to make the banter believable: there is a reason “Deadpool” is his best film – he wears a mask for most of it! His ‘puppy-dog look’ gets rolled out multiple times, but it’s unconvincing in the extreme. Together they are no match for Gosling/Crowe in “The Nice Guys“.
Nun but the brave. Jackson (if not Reynolds) get happy clappy.
On firmer ground is the quirky relationship between Mr and Mrs Kincaid. Although sharing limited screen time together, Hayek and Jackson spark off each other wonderfully. Seeing Selma Hayek in uncharacteristically sweary and belligerent mode was highly entertaining (although it’s worth commenting that my wife took great offence to the ‘comic’ bullying of an overweight cellmate).
“I had to ask the guy next to me to pinch me to make sure I wasn’t dreaming” – the future Mr and Mrs Kincaid meet in a rough place… the seediest dive on the wharf.
Elsewhere in the acting roll call, Elodie Yung delivers just the right measure of cuteness, toughness and passion as Roussel, but Oldman delivers a full-on retread of his Ivan “Get off my plane” Korshunov from “Air Force One”. There is also a change to Oldman’s character’s face at the end of the film in the form of a rampant skin complaint which is ‘explained’ by a clumsily inserted news item about an “attempted poisoning”: it’s such a clunky and bizarre addition to the script that it made me wonder whether the actor has some unexpected ailment (like shingles) during filming…. but I can see nothing related to this online.
The striking Elodie Yung as the Interpol agent Roussel.
The screenplay by relative newcomer Tom O’Connor bumps along from implausible action scene to implausible action scene, with more that its fair share of ‘WTF’ moments. For example, after a random chase through multiple Amsterdam alleys and shops, Jackson pulls up outside the very DIY shop Reynolds ends up in to pick him up! The script is also tonally uneven throughout: given this is supposed to be an “action comedy” the action is often brutal and unpleasant and the comedy – in the main – just not funny enough. (About the funniest thing in the film are the most ineffective sub machine guns known to man, most notably in the mildly ludicrous, if well staged, boat chase scene!)
An entertaining cameo from Richard E Grant as a businessman in danger.
The film also manages to offend, in more ways than the 15-rated violence and language used: I’m not sure WHEN this movie was actually filmed, but the use of an articulated lorry as a terrorist weapon towards the end of the film is certainly in very poor taste after the events of Nice, London and Barcelona. Not appreciated.
Directed by Patrick Hughes (“The Expendables 3″…. say no more) this hodge-podge of a flick is sporadically entertaining, but is one I will struggle to remember in a couple of months time.
Chris Sawin (602 KP) rated The Northman (2022) in Movies
Apr 30, 2022
The bloody action. (2 more)
The rhythmic, pounding score.
Amleth's visions and strange encounters.
May be too weird or slow for some. (2 more)
Won't change your opinion of Robert Eggers if you already dislike him as a filmmaker.
...Did you say fart sniffing?
A Gory Viking Epic Forged in Boisterous Greatness
The Northman is director Robert Eggers third feature length film after The Witch and The Lighthouse. The film is written by Eggers and Sjón (Lamb, frequent collaborator with Björk). The Northman is described as an epic historical action drama, but is essentially a Viking revenge film. Taking place in AD 895, King Aurvandill War-Raven (Ethan Hawke) is killed by his brother, Fjölnir (Claes Bang). Aurvandill’s son, Amleth (Oscar Novak portrays young Amleth) flees and swears revenge on his uncle while vowing to save his mother Queen Gudrún (Nicole Kidman).
In AD 914, a now adult Amleth (Alexander Skarsgård) has been raised as a Viking and was enlisted as a berserker. Seemingly losing his focus in furious battle, Amleth is reminded of his vengeful mission a few years later by a Seeress (Björk) that predicts that Amleth will soon get his sought after revenge on his uncle.
The film is based on the story of Amleth, which was written sometime before the year 1200 and inspired Shakespeare’s Hamlet. The Northman feels like it’s forged by the same cinematic swordsmith that created the likes of Conan the Barbarian, Beowulf, and Gladiator, but with a bloodier, and slightly trippier ambiance Robert Eggers tends to be known for.
Amleth’s opening voiceover as the film opens with a monstrously intimidating volcano on the verge of erupting is haunting. Alexander Skarsgård has this gruff and nearly grunt-like growl to his speech that you can feel reverberate in your chest as he speaks. The score to the film is also just as memorable and incredible. On paper, it’s just a series of loud drumming or pounding, a fancy string arrangement, and some harmless chanting. But all of those elements together suddenly become this impressive musical declaration of war. The score constantly crescendos and always finds a way to ignite a fire within you.
It’s humorous to think that most will have seen Willem Dafoe last in Spider-Man: No Way Home. Dafoe’s role as Heimir the Fool is also a leap in a different direction even when compared to his role as Thomas Wake in The Lighthouse. Heimir’s key role in the story is to oversee the spiritual journey Almeth takes with Aurvandill right before his death. It’s a bizarre sequence as both grown men and young boy are dressed in nothing but loin cloths as they act like dogs, get on their hands and knees, drink water from a bowl, belch, and take turns sniffing each other’s farts. It’s an intriguing role for Dafoe as he’s this crowd pleasing jester one minute and a spiritual guide the next.
The barbaric action is fairly straightforward in The Northman, but what complicates things are Amleth’s visions. Beginning with his encounter with the Seeress, Amleth also battles an undead spirit for the Night Blade, has a vision of a Valkyrie taking him to Valhalla, and sees his unborn children in rare glimpses of the future. These surreal sequences have a palpable dream-like quality to them. It makes you wonder if they’re actually occurring or are only in Amleth’s head.
Nicole Kidman is exceptional as Queen Gudrún. The character is written in a way that makes her seem like a damsel in distress, but she’s much more evil and manipulative. At first, she seems like the typical Queen character that is pushed aside in order to give the spotlight to the king. But once Gudrún comes face to face with an adult Amleth, she strikes like a snake with venomous words that pierce Amleth deeper than any weapon actually could. Kidman shines in the role as well as you seem to love the fact that a mother could be so cruel to one of her children.
Spoiling a film is no fun, but since The Northman is kind of bombing at the box office right now ($23.5 million opening weekend on a $70-$90 million budget) this is worth mentioning. The finale of the film takes place at the volcano Hekla, which resides at the Gates of Hel. Lava is spilling out everywhere as smoke fills the air and two grown men sword duel to the death. That’s right, the ending of The Northman has two naked men sword fighting at the base of an erupting volcano. It’s freaking nuts.
The Northman is a bloody and ferocious battle cry of a revenge film. The action is brutal and the performances are extraordinary. This is Robert Eggers at his most savage and masterful.
In AD 914, a now adult Amleth (Alexander Skarsgård) has been raised as a Viking and was enlisted as a berserker. Seemingly losing his focus in furious battle, Amleth is reminded of his vengeful mission a few years later by a Seeress (Björk) that predicts that Amleth will soon get his sought after revenge on his uncle.
The film is based on the story of Amleth, which was written sometime before the year 1200 and inspired Shakespeare’s Hamlet. The Northman feels like it’s forged by the same cinematic swordsmith that created the likes of Conan the Barbarian, Beowulf, and Gladiator, but with a bloodier, and slightly trippier ambiance Robert Eggers tends to be known for.
Amleth’s opening voiceover as the film opens with a monstrously intimidating volcano on the verge of erupting is haunting. Alexander Skarsgård has this gruff and nearly grunt-like growl to his speech that you can feel reverberate in your chest as he speaks. The score to the film is also just as memorable and incredible. On paper, it’s just a series of loud drumming or pounding, a fancy string arrangement, and some harmless chanting. But all of those elements together suddenly become this impressive musical declaration of war. The score constantly crescendos and always finds a way to ignite a fire within you.
It’s humorous to think that most will have seen Willem Dafoe last in Spider-Man: No Way Home. Dafoe’s role as Heimir the Fool is also a leap in a different direction even when compared to his role as Thomas Wake in The Lighthouse. Heimir’s key role in the story is to oversee the spiritual journey Almeth takes with Aurvandill right before his death. It’s a bizarre sequence as both grown men and young boy are dressed in nothing but loin cloths as they act like dogs, get on their hands and knees, drink water from a bowl, belch, and take turns sniffing each other’s farts. It’s an intriguing role for Dafoe as he’s this crowd pleasing jester one minute and a spiritual guide the next.
The barbaric action is fairly straightforward in The Northman, but what complicates things are Amleth’s visions. Beginning with his encounter with the Seeress, Amleth also battles an undead spirit for the Night Blade, has a vision of a Valkyrie taking him to Valhalla, and sees his unborn children in rare glimpses of the future. These surreal sequences have a palpable dream-like quality to them. It makes you wonder if they’re actually occurring or are only in Amleth’s head.
Nicole Kidman is exceptional as Queen Gudrún. The character is written in a way that makes her seem like a damsel in distress, but she’s much more evil and manipulative. At first, she seems like the typical Queen character that is pushed aside in order to give the spotlight to the king. But once Gudrún comes face to face with an adult Amleth, she strikes like a snake with venomous words that pierce Amleth deeper than any weapon actually could. Kidman shines in the role as well as you seem to love the fact that a mother could be so cruel to one of her children.
Spoiling a film is no fun, but since The Northman is kind of bombing at the box office right now ($23.5 million opening weekend on a $70-$90 million budget) this is worth mentioning. The finale of the film takes place at the volcano Hekla, which resides at the Gates of Hel. Lava is spilling out everywhere as smoke fills the air and two grown men sword duel to the death. That’s right, the ending of The Northman has two naked men sword fighting at the base of an erupting volcano. It’s freaking nuts.
The Northman is a bloody and ferocious battle cry of a revenge film. The action is brutal and the performances are extraordinary. This is Robert Eggers at his most savage and masterful.
Gareth von Kallenbach (980 KP) rated the PlayStation 3 version of Deadpool in Video Games
Jun 19, 2019
Marvel comics classic antihero Deadpool has made a jump to the big leagues as the star of his own videogame by high Moon Studios. For those unfamiliar with the character, Deadpool is a mentally unstable mercenary who is deadly efficient with all manner of weaponry and takes delightful glee and dispensing violence. As the game opens, dead pool breaks down the fourth wall and openly speaks to the players often chiding them for their performance as well as cracking several raunchy one-liners and quips in the process. In his rundown apartment, we learn the dead pool has coursed through the use of high explosives the creation of a videogame written by and starring himself.
At numerous times throughout the game Deadpool will open the script to offer his creative input and decide to go off script and make some very creative and often bloody changes to the storyline which often causes the unseen but often heard studio exec complain about the budget of the game being surpassed.
While this is a very interesting set up and does add a lot of unique new wrinkles to a game of this type, at its heart Deadpool is simply an action adventure game in a style that we have seen many times before often in better games.
In pursuit of a contract, Deadpool graphically dispatches waves of enemies using his signature swords and guns which allow him to do all manner of complicated and impressive combat moves. As enemies are dispatched, players can earn the ability to purchase and equip new weapons such as shotguns, bear traps, grenades, dual machine guns, and more as well as have the ability to upgrade some of Dead pools abilities such as his healing speed. Like fellow mutant Wolverine, who briefly shows up the game, Deadpool is capable of regenerating health, so when combat becomes too intense it is often advisable for players to retreat to heal before wading back into the never-ending siege of enemy opponents.
Deadpool can also do some very creative stealth kills such as coming up behind an opponent and decapitating them or dispatching them with a quick shot to the head. This does have its own risks as excessive noise tends to attract large mobs of enemies and even as good as Deadpool is there comes a point where discretion is the better part of valor. Thankfully Deadpool has the ability to teleport away from danger and this comes exceptionally handy during the games numerous and at times frustrating jump sequences when a jump goes wrong.
There are elements of the game that are frustratingly hard but then there are moments that are absolute delight for fans of action games as well as, book heroes. The bawdy and over-the-top humor was excessive at times but was also entertaining and the character animations were true delight especially when Deadpool became a spinning dervish of death and dismemberment courtesy of his bladed weapons and guns.
Many of the enemies though became highly redundant and some did require a considerable amount of effort to dispatch so it is important that players conserve their ammunition as much as possible as running dry often required a hasty retreat rather than staying and finishing the job.
There were several clever cameos in game which I do not want to spoil and it was really nice to step into the bizarre and mayhem filled world in which the title character lives. My biggest issues with the game were that the gameplay became very repetitive after a while and the timed jumps and certain fights became extremely frustrating. If I want to do precision jumps from platform to platform to accomplish a goal, I will fire up the Wii U and play a game of Mario brothers.
I also had issues with some glitches in the game such as weapons animations disappearing and one extremely annoying sequence where the control systems on the PC version of the game went haywire and the character started to move on his own without any input from the controls. There were also some problems with the camera angles which in the heat of pitched battles became highly frustrating as I found myself boxed in and unable to see which way to go.
The graphics and sound in the game were solid but to control systems did have an element of frustration to them. While you are able to customize the controls on the PC version of the game, I did have to wonder how much easier the game would be on a console as it seems as if this wasn’t the intended platform of choice as it is a button mashers dream which is very conducive to a game control but not as friendly to a keyboard and mouse combination.
If you can look past the frustrations of the game, there is a lot to like here. Specifically the character, the action, and the ability to play as a truly demented individual who writes his own rules and does not care what anyone else has to say.
In the end the game is entertaining though nothing spectacular and while it may appeal mainly to hard-core fans of the character, I cannot help but think that the game could’ve been so much more.
http://sknr.net/2013/06/28/deadpool/
At numerous times throughout the game Deadpool will open the script to offer his creative input and decide to go off script and make some very creative and often bloody changes to the storyline which often causes the unseen but often heard studio exec complain about the budget of the game being surpassed.
While this is a very interesting set up and does add a lot of unique new wrinkles to a game of this type, at its heart Deadpool is simply an action adventure game in a style that we have seen many times before often in better games.
In pursuit of a contract, Deadpool graphically dispatches waves of enemies using his signature swords and guns which allow him to do all manner of complicated and impressive combat moves. As enemies are dispatched, players can earn the ability to purchase and equip new weapons such as shotguns, bear traps, grenades, dual machine guns, and more as well as have the ability to upgrade some of Dead pools abilities such as his healing speed. Like fellow mutant Wolverine, who briefly shows up the game, Deadpool is capable of regenerating health, so when combat becomes too intense it is often advisable for players to retreat to heal before wading back into the never-ending siege of enemy opponents.
Deadpool can also do some very creative stealth kills such as coming up behind an opponent and decapitating them or dispatching them with a quick shot to the head. This does have its own risks as excessive noise tends to attract large mobs of enemies and even as good as Deadpool is there comes a point where discretion is the better part of valor. Thankfully Deadpool has the ability to teleport away from danger and this comes exceptionally handy during the games numerous and at times frustrating jump sequences when a jump goes wrong.
There are elements of the game that are frustratingly hard but then there are moments that are absolute delight for fans of action games as well as, book heroes. The bawdy and over-the-top humor was excessive at times but was also entertaining and the character animations were true delight especially when Deadpool became a spinning dervish of death and dismemberment courtesy of his bladed weapons and guns.
Many of the enemies though became highly redundant and some did require a considerable amount of effort to dispatch so it is important that players conserve their ammunition as much as possible as running dry often required a hasty retreat rather than staying and finishing the job.
There were several clever cameos in game which I do not want to spoil and it was really nice to step into the bizarre and mayhem filled world in which the title character lives. My biggest issues with the game were that the gameplay became very repetitive after a while and the timed jumps and certain fights became extremely frustrating. If I want to do precision jumps from platform to platform to accomplish a goal, I will fire up the Wii U and play a game of Mario brothers.
I also had issues with some glitches in the game such as weapons animations disappearing and one extremely annoying sequence where the control systems on the PC version of the game went haywire and the character started to move on his own without any input from the controls. There were also some problems with the camera angles which in the heat of pitched battles became highly frustrating as I found myself boxed in and unable to see which way to go.
The graphics and sound in the game were solid but to control systems did have an element of frustration to them. While you are able to customize the controls on the PC version of the game, I did have to wonder how much easier the game would be on a console as it seems as if this wasn’t the intended platform of choice as it is a button mashers dream which is very conducive to a game control but not as friendly to a keyboard and mouse combination.
If you can look past the frustrations of the game, there is a lot to like here. Specifically the character, the action, and the ability to play as a truly demented individual who writes his own rules and does not care what anyone else has to say.
In the end the game is entertaining though nothing spectacular and while it may appeal mainly to hard-core fans of the character, I cannot help but think that the game could’ve been so much more.
http://sknr.net/2013/06/28/deadpool/
Gareth von Kallenbach (980 KP) rated AVP - Alien Vs. Predator (2004) in Movies
Aug 14, 2019
For over a decade fans of the “Alien” and “Predator” films series have been tempted by various rumors regarding a proposed film that would match the two titans in an epic onscreen clash to determine who is the ultimate Sci-Fi bad guy.
Sadly none of the rumors panned out as one script after another was rejected ranging from issues over proposed budgets in excess of $200 million to lack of a human character dynamic. Fans continued to follow the series in the only ways that they could, comics, books, and games all the while hoping that someday a film would come.
Thankfully the wait is over as “Alien VS Predator” has come to fruition under the guidance of writer/director Paul Anderson who has an impressive science fiction track record with “Event Horizon” and “Resident Evil” amongst his credits. While some fans debated if Anderson was the right person for the project, few can dispute his passion for the series.
The film stars Lance Henriksen as Billionaire Charles Weyland, who discovers a large pyramid beneath the ice in Antarctica thanks to one of his satellites. Knowing that this could be the find of a lifetime, Weyland assembles a team of drillers, archeologists, climbers, and support personal and rushes to the harsh location to investigate the location before any other interested parties can discover his find and claim it for themselves.
Upon arriving at the location, the team discovers a massive pyramid that shows connections to all of the other pyramids on earth causing the team to believe that they have proof that the pyramids of earth were influenced by an outside culture whom the natives worshipped.
The presence of human remains in a sacrificial chamber only helps to strengthen this belief and the team continues to explore the pyramid to see what other grand treasures lay within. Upon arrival, the team has unknowingly awakened a captive alien queen from stasis and long dormant machines awaken and begin harvesting the eggs from the captive queen, Each egg is filled with a deadly face hugger that will not only kill the host it attaches itself to, but will produce an alien who is as deadly as it is relentless.
As if this was not bad enough for the team, a ship enters earth orbit and a landing craft of young predator males hurries to the pyramid. The predators are aware of the human’s presence and arrive ready for battle. It is learned that the predators use the aliens as a coming of age ritual as they are very deadly and seen as a worthy test of a young males worth.
Before long, the humans are caught in nightmare come to life as Weyland, his guide Lex (Sanaa Lathan), and the rest of the team are caught in the middle of a deadly battle between the aliens and predators with death and destruction all around them. The team has no idea what the creatures are, but they know that they are very deadly and their dwindling numbers only underscores this fact and their need to escape from the pyramid, which has become like a gigantic puzzle as it is constantly reconfiguring itself causing passages that were once wide open to become blocked.
To compound the peril of the situation, the team is 2000 ft below the ice and a storm is raging on the surface making the escape and elements as deadly as the bizarre creatures.
“AVP” combines the old-fashioned monster and haunted house movies of old to create a thrilling blend of action and Science fiction that is sure to delight fans. My biggest fault with the film was that it was not long enough as the 100 minute running time passed quickly and I was left wanting even more as good as the action sequences were I had hoped that there would be more of them. The film is also light on scares and tension as Anderson seems to have decided that the audience for this film would know about the title creatures already so time did not need to be spent on reintroductions.
The action sequences in the film are solid and they had the audience in my press screener cheering loudly and often as the two cinematic titans waged war. The pacing of the film is brisk and the lighting and visuals of the film are used well to create the atmosphere, I found the sequences were flashlights and laser sites probed the dark areas of the pyramid to be fascinating to watch as the eerie glow was appropriate to the mood of the film.
True the film does not have much in the way of complex plot, character development, or much for the cast to do other than be middlemen to the title creatures, but Anderson stays true to the source material and delivers a solid tale the largely protects the continuity of the “Alien” series and paves the way for future installments.
While some may find issue with the toned down nature of the films violence compared to others in the series, I found that I was still able to enjoy the film and I am sure a rematch between the title characters is something fans everywhere will be waiting for.
Sadly none of the rumors panned out as one script after another was rejected ranging from issues over proposed budgets in excess of $200 million to lack of a human character dynamic. Fans continued to follow the series in the only ways that they could, comics, books, and games all the while hoping that someday a film would come.
Thankfully the wait is over as “Alien VS Predator” has come to fruition under the guidance of writer/director Paul Anderson who has an impressive science fiction track record with “Event Horizon” and “Resident Evil” amongst his credits. While some fans debated if Anderson was the right person for the project, few can dispute his passion for the series.
The film stars Lance Henriksen as Billionaire Charles Weyland, who discovers a large pyramid beneath the ice in Antarctica thanks to one of his satellites. Knowing that this could be the find of a lifetime, Weyland assembles a team of drillers, archeologists, climbers, and support personal and rushes to the harsh location to investigate the location before any other interested parties can discover his find and claim it for themselves.
Upon arriving at the location, the team discovers a massive pyramid that shows connections to all of the other pyramids on earth causing the team to believe that they have proof that the pyramids of earth were influenced by an outside culture whom the natives worshipped.
The presence of human remains in a sacrificial chamber only helps to strengthen this belief and the team continues to explore the pyramid to see what other grand treasures lay within. Upon arrival, the team has unknowingly awakened a captive alien queen from stasis and long dormant machines awaken and begin harvesting the eggs from the captive queen, Each egg is filled with a deadly face hugger that will not only kill the host it attaches itself to, but will produce an alien who is as deadly as it is relentless.
As if this was not bad enough for the team, a ship enters earth orbit and a landing craft of young predator males hurries to the pyramid. The predators are aware of the human’s presence and arrive ready for battle. It is learned that the predators use the aliens as a coming of age ritual as they are very deadly and seen as a worthy test of a young males worth.
Before long, the humans are caught in nightmare come to life as Weyland, his guide Lex (Sanaa Lathan), and the rest of the team are caught in the middle of a deadly battle between the aliens and predators with death and destruction all around them. The team has no idea what the creatures are, but they know that they are very deadly and their dwindling numbers only underscores this fact and their need to escape from the pyramid, which has become like a gigantic puzzle as it is constantly reconfiguring itself causing passages that were once wide open to become blocked.
To compound the peril of the situation, the team is 2000 ft below the ice and a storm is raging on the surface making the escape and elements as deadly as the bizarre creatures.
“AVP” combines the old-fashioned monster and haunted house movies of old to create a thrilling blend of action and Science fiction that is sure to delight fans. My biggest fault with the film was that it was not long enough as the 100 minute running time passed quickly and I was left wanting even more as good as the action sequences were I had hoped that there would be more of them. The film is also light on scares and tension as Anderson seems to have decided that the audience for this film would know about the title creatures already so time did not need to be spent on reintroductions.
The action sequences in the film are solid and they had the audience in my press screener cheering loudly and often as the two cinematic titans waged war. The pacing of the film is brisk and the lighting and visuals of the film are used well to create the atmosphere, I found the sequences were flashlights and laser sites probed the dark areas of the pyramid to be fascinating to watch as the eerie glow was appropriate to the mood of the film.
True the film does not have much in the way of complex plot, character development, or much for the cast to do other than be middlemen to the title creatures, but Anderson stays true to the source material and delivers a solid tale the largely protects the continuity of the “Alien” series and paves the way for future installments.
While some may find issue with the toned down nature of the films violence compared to others in the series, I found that I was still able to enjoy the film and I am sure a rematch between the title characters is something fans everywhere will be waiting for.
Gareth von Kallenbach (980 KP) rated The Thing (2011) in Movies
Aug 7, 2019
After the success of a videogame based on the original film, rumors of a sequel arose many times but never came to fruition, with creative differences between Universal and John Carpenter cited as the main reason. It was oft-speculated that Carpenter made a deal to write and produce a sequel provided he got to name has director. But when he opted to name himself director the studio balked and the project fell apart. In the aftermath, rumors of a miniseries on the SyfY channel arose along with the possibility of retelling the story with 20-somethings on a tropical island but (thankfully) they never saw the light of day.
Rather than do a sequel or remake, Universal opted to jump start the franchise with a prequel that covers the events leading up to the John Carpenter film. It is set in 1982 at a Norwegian research station in Antarctica shortly before the scientists make an amazing discovery. When they uncover an alien craft that had been buried in the ice for over 100,000 years, as well as a frozen crewmember from the craft, they quickly celebrate the scientific discovery of a lifetime.
Kate Lloyd (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), is recruited by a famed scientist to travel to the desolate continent to research the find. Told only that they are about to research an amazing discovery, Kate and a team of specialists arrive and are absolutely stunned by the magnitude of their discovery. Kate urges caution but is overridden by the expedition leader Dr. Halvorsan (Ulrich Thomsen), who insists on taking a tissue sample of the frozen creature encassed in a block of ice.
Later that evening while celebrating, the very much alive creature escapes from its icy prison and begins to systematically hunt the members of the research team. The creature is eventually trapped and burned which causes some consternation over the loss of the creature for further scientific study, but many in the camp applaud its loss after seeing firsthand the destruction it is capable of.
After a bizarre series of events, Kate makes the startling discovery that the cells of the creature are able to imitate and perfectly replicate any thing that it comes in contact with. As a result, not only is the creature very much alive, but the individuals in the camp may no longer be human. Trapped in a remote location with an advancing winter storm, suspicions and paranoia go through the roof as the survivors are pitted against one another, unsure of who is still human. What follows is a high-octane adventure awash in action and grisly special-effects as the two species are locked in the ultimate battle for survival.
The film has a good supporting cast and Joel Edgerton does solid supporting work as an American helicopter pilot assigned to the camp. Eric Christian Olsen provides a steadying presence as a research assistant but his character is not as developed as it could be. It is known that he and Kate know each other but their past history is undefined which makes their relationship a bit puzzling in the film especially when the survivors begin to pick sides.
While the movie is not going to make fans forget the original, it is a very worthy companion piece. As the film was winding down I found myself checking off a couple of inconsistencies with the original film, but was very pleasantly surprised when this was all explained during the end credits which perfectly synced the end of this film with the opening of John Carpenter’s classic.
In many ways the weakness of film is due to the success of John Carpenter’s previous film, in that the creature is not that much of a mystery this time around. Part of the suspense of the previous film was not knowing how the creature operated nor how it was capable of infecting and replicating numerous individuals.
This time around the suspense is lost due to the familiarity with the creature. As a result, director Matthijs van Heijningen focused his efforts on a more action adventure oriented film that gave very little time for character development. We are not told very much about many of the characters in the film as they simply exist to serve as potential victims for the creature. All one really needs to know is they are scientists or support staff as aside from a handful of characters we’re not really given much reason to care whether they survive.
Visually the film is sharp and it is clear that a lot of attention was paid to replicate the look of the previous film. The shots of vast fields of ice and snow emphasized the remote and isolated setting that the characters find themselves in and served as a reminder that danger lurks all around. The special-effects have obviously been upgraded since 1982 and it was nice to see that the creative elements did not go overboard on CGI effects, and actually used puppetry and animatronics to provide updated creature effects that were still in keeping with the look and tone from the previous film.
While the film is not likely to reach the iconic status of the previous film, it is still a worthy companion piece that has enough action and effects to keep it interesting to fans of the series – just so long as they keep their expectations reasonable and do not expect a film on par with the previous one.
Rather than do a sequel or remake, Universal opted to jump start the franchise with a prequel that covers the events leading up to the John Carpenter film. It is set in 1982 at a Norwegian research station in Antarctica shortly before the scientists make an amazing discovery. When they uncover an alien craft that had been buried in the ice for over 100,000 years, as well as a frozen crewmember from the craft, they quickly celebrate the scientific discovery of a lifetime.
Kate Lloyd (Mary Elizabeth Winstead), is recruited by a famed scientist to travel to the desolate continent to research the find. Told only that they are about to research an amazing discovery, Kate and a team of specialists arrive and are absolutely stunned by the magnitude of their discovery. Kate urges caution but is overridden by the expedition leader Dr. Halvorsan (Ulrich Thomsen), who insists on taking a tissue sample of the frozen creature encassed in a block of ice.
Later that evening while celebrating, the very much alive creature escapes from its icy prison and begins to systematically hunt the members of the research team. The creature is eventually trapped and burned which causes some consternation over the loss of the creature for further scientific study, but many in the camp applaud its loss after seeing firsthand the destruction it is capable of.
After a bizarre series of events, Kate makes the startling discovery that the cells of the creature are able to imitate and perfectly replicate any thing that it comes in contact with. As a result, not only is the creature very much alive, but the individuals in the camp may no longer be human. Trapped in a remote location with an advancing winter storm, suspicions and paranoia go through the roof as the survivors are pitted against one another, unsure of who is still human. What follows is a high-octane adventure awash in action and grisly special-effects as the two species are locked in the ultimate battle for survival.
The film has a good supporting cast and Joel Edgerton does solid supporting work as an American helicopter pilot assigned to the camp. Eric Christian Olsen provides a steadying presence as a research assistant but his character is not as developed as it could be. It is known that he and Kate know each other but their past history is undefined which makes their relationship a bit puzzling in the film especially when the survivors begin to pick sides.
While the movie is not going to make fans forget the original, it is a very worthy companion piece. As the film was winding down I found myself checking off a couple of inconsistencies with the original film, but was very pleasantly surprised when this was all explained during the end credits which perfectly synced the end of this film with the opening of John Carpenter’s classic.
In many ways the weakness of film is due to the success of John Carpenter’s previous film, in that the creature is not that much of a mystery this time around. Part of the suspense of the previous film was not knowing how the creature operated nor how it was capable of infecting and replicating numerous individuals.
This time around the suspense is lost due to the familiarity with the creature. As a result, director Matthijs van Heijningen focused his efforts on a more action adventure oriented film that gave very little time for character development. We are not told very much about many of the characters in the film as they simply exist to serve as potential victims for the creature. All one really needs to know is they are scientists or support staff as aside from a handful of characters we’re not really given much reason to care whether they survive.
Visually the film is sharp and it is clear that a lot of attention was paid to replicate the look of the previous film. The shots of vast fields of ice and snow emphasized the remote and isolated setting that the characters find themselves in and served as a reminder that danger lurks all around. The special-effects have obviously been upgraded since 1982 and it was nice to see that the creative elements did not go overboard on CGI effects, and actually used puppetry and animatronics to provide updated creature effects that were still in keeping with the look and tone from the previous film.
While the film is not likely to reach the iconic status of the previous film, it is still a worthy companion piece that has enough action and effects to keep it interesting to fans of the series – just so long as they keep their expectations reasonable and do not expect a film on par with the previous one.