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Two Weeks in the Midday Sun: A Cannes Notebook
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A paragon of cinema criticism for decades, Roger Ebert--with his humor, sagacity, and no-nonsense...

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LeftSideCut (3776 KP) rated Death on the Nile (2022) in Movies
Feb 15, 2022
To start with, there's only so much you can hate on an Agatha Christie adaption. The film could be torrid tripe, but there's still a particular brand of intrigue which always comes with one of her whodunits. This latest re-telling of Death on the Nile just about scrapes by, mainly thanks to its second half, and that aforementioned Christie narrative, but sadly, not much else.
There's glimpses of something good there. Kenneth Branagh can be hit or miss as far as I'm concerned. For every Belfast (soaringly wonderful) there's an Artemis Fowl (what I imagine a lobotomy feels like). This is somewhere in the middle. There are moments of promise sprinkled here and there, but they struggle to break through all the bloated hot air that is draped over everything.
All of the characters are ridiculous. I get that's part of it, but it just falls flat here. It's hard to enjoy comic relief when everyone is comic relief. Gal Gadot seems like she is half-arsing every line. Russell Brand feels jarringly out of place. I traditionally enjoy French & Saunders but they also feel alien in every scene they're in. I know this shouldn't really impact my view, but Armie Hammer look like he just wants to eat everyone he talks to. Even the usually reliable Annette Benning comes across completely disinterested. There's no chemistry anywhere, and it all just feels a bit odd. Branagh is pretty great as Poirot to his credit. He just about holds proceedings together along with Sophie Okonedo, and they both manage to inject some charisma when things become arduous, which is farily regularly.
A bit of a misfire then, but not a complete disaster. I can firmly file Death on the Nile under "films I don't really like, but would probably watch again if it was on TV, or maybe on Christmas day at my Mums house".
There's glimpses of something good there. Kenneth Branagh can be hit or miss as far as I'm concerned. For every Belfast (soaringly wonderful) there's an Artemis Fowl (what I imagine a lobotomy feels like). This is somewhere in the middle. There are moments of promise sprinkled here and there, but they struggle to break through all the bloated hot air that is draped over everything.
All of the characters are ridiculous. I get that's part of it, but it just falls flat here. It's hard to enjoy comic relief when everyone is comic relief. Gal Gadot seems like she is half-arsing every line. Russell Brand feels jarringly out of place. I traditionally enjoy French & Saunders but they also feel alien in every scene they're in. I know this shouldn't really impact my view, but Armie Hammer look like he just wants to eat everyone he talks to. Even the usually reliable Annette Benning comes across completely disinterested. There's no chemistry anywhere, and it all just feels a bit odd. Branagh is pretty great as Poirot to his credit. He just about holds proceedings together along with Sophie Okonedo, and they both manage to inject some charisma when things become arduous, which is farily regularly.
A bit of a misfire then, but not a complete disaster. I can firmly file Death on the Nile under "films I don't really like, but would probably watch again if it was on TV, or maybe on Christmas day at my Mums house".