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LeftSideCut (3776 KP) rated Blood Machines (2019) in Movies
Aug 15, 2020
Blood Machines is essentially a glorified music video for French synthwave outfit Carpenter Brut. That's not something that automatically de-credits the project of course, and sci-fi fans will undoubtedly get a kick out of it.
Aesthetically, Blood Machines looks pretty stunning. The entire 50 minute runtime is bursting with colour, and is visually impressive. The settings are truly otherworldly.
The screenplay and to a certain extent the plot, take a backseat. The dialogue is frequently silly (possibly intentional) and doesn't really offer much - I actually think it could have benefited from no dialogue at all - but the makers hope to distract from this with naked women adorning upside down crucifixes across their torsos. Nothing like a bit of nudity mixed with anti-religious symbolism to fill up the "edgy" quota after all.
I actually saw Carpenter Brut at Arctangent in 2019, completely unaware of who they were, and honestly had a great time. Their music is heavily inspired by 80s movies, and the visuals they use in their live performances reflect that. Here, their music adds to the experience of Blood Machines in spades, and a big part of why I enjoyed it.
If you have an hour to kill and like Sci-Fi, then I would encourage you to check out Blood Machines. It's not revolutionary but it's entertaining enough for what it's is.
Aesthetically, Blood Machines looks pretty stunning. The entire 50 minute runtime is bursting with colour, and is visually impressive. The settings are truly otherworldly.
The screenplay and to a certain extent the plot, take a backseat. The dialogue is frequently silly (possibly intentional) and doesn't really offer much - I actually think it could have benefited from no dialogue at all - but the makers hope to distract from this with naked women adorning upside down crucifixes across their torsos. Nothing like a bit of nudity mixed with anti-religious symbolism to fill up the "edgy" quota after all.
I actually saw Carpenter Brut at Arctangent in 2019, completely unaware of who they were, and honestly had a great time. Their music is heavily inspired by 80s movies, and the visuals they use in their live performances reflect that. Here, their music adds to the experience of Blood Machines in spades, and a big part of why I enjoyed it.
If you have an hour to kill and like Sci-Fi, then I would encourage you to check out Blood Machines. It's not revolutionary but it's entertaining enough for what it's is.
Christine A. (965 KP) rated Sex in the Name of God in Books
Dec 9, 2018
Covers very difficult and sometimes volatile topic (1 more)
Humorous yet repectful
Explains sex in the Bible in a humorous way
I was provided with a complimentary copy of this book so I could give an honest review. Sex and God are not normally two words uttered in the same discussion and rarely in the same sentence. This book, "Sex in the Name of God" by Wilfred Knight discusses both together throughout the 199 page book. The books covers very difficult and sometimes volatile topics. It starts with "Nudity and Incest: Forbidden Fruit" (chapter 1), continues with "Prositution: Whorer Stories" (chapter 7) and "Rape: What a Dick!" (Chaper 9) and ends with "Sex in Heaven" (chapter 17).
The book is not one that I was able to read in one or two sittings. I read a chapter at a time with long breaks in between as I usually read short stories.
Each topic covered is done with humor. Yet, the author is able to do so while being respectful. It is a very thin line and he walks it carefully. I would not recommend this book to anyone who is extremely religious or anyone who does not think religion should be discussed in a humorous way. For all others, this is worth checking out. My favorite idea discussed is "the only upside is the knowledge that family dysfunction is an intended norm." (page 6). Good to know. We're normal!
The book is not one that I was able to read in one or two sittings. I read a chapter at a time with long breaks in between as I usually read short stories.
Each topic covered is done with humor. Yet, the author is able to do so while being respectful. It is a very thin line and he walks it carefully. I would not recommend this book to anyone who is extremely religious or anyone who does not think religion should be discussed in a humorous way. For all others, this is worth checking out. My favorite idea discussed is "the only upside is the knowledge that family dysfunction is an intended norm." (page 6). Good to know. We're normal!
David McK (3505 KP) rated Northlanders Book 1: The Anglo-Saxon Saga (Northlanders, Book 1) in Books
Jan 30, 2019
Boy, was that violent - if this was a movie, it would probably be given an '18' (or 'R'estricted, for those Americans out there) rating, not just for the blood, guts and gore, but also for the - occassional - nudity, and the not-so-occassional language.
Actually a collection of 5 different short stories, I can't say how true to history these are as I'm not a Norse scholar. I also found the vernacular a bit off-putting (were swear-words the same in the early Medieval Period as they are now? Really??), with the art-style (and plot) in some of the stories were better than in others. Talking of stories, this contains the following:
[b]Lindisfarne[/b]: depicting an early Viking raid on the monastery of the same name
[b]The Shield Maidens[/b]: in which three Viking women hold off hordes of the Saxons
[b]Sven the Returned[/b]: in which Sven returns to his homeland to claim his inheritance, having previously run away and joined the Byzantine Varangian Guard
[b]Thor's daughter[/b]: in which a clan leader is murdered and his land sold to a rival leader but his 14 year old daughter takes up his mantle and leads an army against the encroaching Vikings
[b]The Cross & The Hammer[/b]: Set in Ireland, this is more-or-less a murder mystery in which the central character is trying to track down the person(s) responsible for a spate of killings.
Actually a collection of 5 different short stories, I can't say how true to history these are as I'm not a Norse scholar. I also found the vernacular a bit off-putting (were swear-words the same in the early Medieval Period as they are now? Really??), with the art-style (and plot) in some of the stories were better than in others. Talking of stories, this contains the following:
[b]Lindisfarne[/b]: depicting an early Viking raid on the monastery of the same name
[b]The Shield Maidens[/b]: in which three Viking women hold off hordes of the Saxons
[b]Sven the Returned[/b]: in which Sven returns to his homeland to claim his inheritance, having previously run away and joined the Byzantine Varangian Guard
[b]Thor's daughter[/b]: in which a clan leader is murdered and his land sold to a rival leader but his 14 year old daughter takes up his mantle and leads an army against the encroaching Vikings
[b]The Cross & The Hammer[/b]: Set in Ireland, this is more-or-less a murder mystery in which the central character is trying to track down the person(s) responsible for a spate of killings.
TH
The Human Body in Early Iron Age Central Europe: Burial Practices and Images of the Hallstatt World
Book
Identities and social relations are fundamental elements of societies. To approach these topics from...
Henry Rollins recommended The Graduate (1967) in Movies (curated)
LoganCrews (2861 KP) rated Open Water (2003) in Movies
Sep 19, 2020
Admirable for what it had to work with, and I guess it gets points for being one of the most realistic shark movies out there - but why the hell did this terrify everyone back in the day lmfao. It amounts to a somehow pointedly slow 81 minutes (less after credits) of a couple bickering at sea while... like, occasionally seeing a jellyfish or maybe half a second of a shark from far away. This actually works better as an (intentional) comedy than a horror film, and the beginning of this feels like a weird ass porno, too - complete with millimeters away from couples full-frontal nudity in a dingy hotel room. The one thing this has going for it is that they're in *real* ocean water with *real* sharks, and on that front there are some real motherfucker shots in this that made me jump just on principle. There's also just some really terrific footage of various sea + land creatures in this that help add to the realism. When all is said and done I have to give props to that brutally hopeless coda though, Jesus Christ - made my skin crawl and actually made this whole product grow on me a lot more than my initial measure. But it fucks around too much and even though it does what it can decently well, it isn't enough. While I still think it's too unfair of a reaction, I can clearly see why everyone hates this now.
LeftSideCut (3776 KP) rated Zombeavers (2015) in Movies
Oct 21, 2020
Do you remember that bit in Scrubs where JD is trying so hard to not laugh at something that Sean Hayes' character says because he's cross with him, but let's out the smallest laugh and is then annoyed at himself? That's an accurate portrayal of the one time I found something funny in Zombeavers.
I enjoy a so-bad-it's-good film now and again - may I interest you in the culinary delights of Basket Case, or Maximum Overdrive perhaps? Hell, I'd even take The Wicker Man remake at this point - but Zombeavers is one of those films that thinks it's so-bad-it's-good when if fact it's just plain shite.
It would be a much easier film to enjoy if the characters weren't just completely awful assholes for the entire runtime. There is just no redeeming quality to any of them. I know that they are designed purely to die horrible deaths, but considering those parts don't happen for quite a time, it's a really grating and deeply unfunny experience.
By the time the horror hits, it's too hard to care anymore, and no amount of gratuitous nudity or silly gore can fix that.
I will acknowledge that it does step up a notch in the dying minutes when we get the human-beaver-zombie hybrids (with some pretty gross practical effects) and is the sole reason why this film went from a one to a two.
Big old pile of toss.
I enjoy a so-bad-it's-good film now and again - may I interest you in the culinary delights of Basket Case, or Maximum Overdrive perhaps? Hell, I'd even take The Wicker Man remake at this point - but Zombeavers is one of those films that thinks it's so-bad-it's-good when if fact it's just plain shite.
It would be a much easier film to enjoy if the characters weren't just completely awful assholes for the entire runtime. There is just no redeeming quality to any of them. I know that they are designed purely to die horrible deaths, but considering those parts don't happen for quite a time, it's a really grating and deeply unfunny experience.
By the time the horror hits, it's too hard to care anymore, and no amount of gratuitous nudity or silly gore can fix that.
I will acknowledge that it does step up a notch in the dying minutes when we get the human-beaver-zombie hybrids (with some pretty gross practical effects) and is the sole reason why this film went from a one to a two.
Big old pile of toss.
TheDefunctDiva (304 KP) rated The Wicker Man (1973) in Movies
Aug 29, 2021
Something Wicker This Way Comes
Contains spoilers, click to show
Forgive me, Father, for I am about to spoil this whole film. I am a novice film reviewer, and as such, I know no other way.
This film opens up with a police officer (Sergeant Howie) flying to an island in Scotland. I knew something was up when the older gentlemen in the harbor refused to send a dinghy for him to get onto the island. The older men seemed to be in on some kind of joke. As my teenager would say, “Very sus.”
The rather uppity lawman, portrayed quite convincingly by Edward Woodward, is searching for a girl on the island. The girl, Rowan Morrison, was reported missing by way of an anonymous letter sent to the mainland.
We are then introduced to the woman who is allegedly the missing girl’s mother. She runs the most unsettling candy shop ever. There are a lot of chocolate bunnies, which I am normally all in favor of. But she corrects the officer when he refers to them as bunnies. They are rabbits, of course. Because that increases the creepiness factor by ten.
Howie’s lodging is above a righteously rollicking pub. The locals sing and play about in the pub, and all seems normal.
Forward to the next scene. Holy unexpected nudity, Batman. I am glad my son chose to stay in his room and play Roblox. There are a bunch of naked locals openly copulating in and around the churchyard. Of course, it is later explained that it is not a churchyard, because poor, very stodgy, very Puritan Sergeant Howie has stumbled upon an island of RECKLESS HEATHEN PAGANS.
The lovely Britt Ekland portrays Willow, the barmaid. In a scene early on, she does a ritualistic dance in the nude, in the room next to the very tempted police officer. My boyfriend correctly observed that Howie should stay away from this woman, as she is clearly a siren. Her dance moves were odd to me, and at one point, I asked aloud, “What is she doing?” My boyfriend responded, “She’s twerking.”
The plot thickens like a good rabbit stew. Christopher Lee aptly portrays Lord Summerisle, the leader of the island. Summerisle makes some strange claims about the island, and says the women there get pregnant asexually by way of a ritual. This claim seems counterintuitive, since there seemed to be a lot of unprotected boinking going on by various members of the island, in the open air no less. But hey, maybe these adulterated pagans missed the lecture on the birds and the bees.
As a heathen myself, I didn’t find this movie too horrific until it neared the end. I was more focused on Sergeant Howie’s unwillingness to entertain a faith other than his own. The scenery was breathtaking, as it was filmed entirely on location in Scotland.
I’m not really going to spoil every detail of the ending. But I must observe that this is the strangest version of The 40-Year-Old Virgin I have ever seen.
This film opens up with a police officer (Sergeant Howie) flying to an island in Scotland. I knew something was up when the older gentlemen in the harbor refused to send a dinghy for him to get onto the island. The older men seemed to be in on some kind of joke. As my teenager would say, “Very sus.”
The rather uppity lawman, portrayed quite convincingly by Edward Woodward, is searching for a girl on the island. The girl, Rowan Morrison, was reported missing by way of an anonymous letter sent to the mainland.
We are then introduced to the woman who is allegedly the missing girl’s mother. She runs the most unsettling candy shop ever. There are a lot of chocolate bunnies, which I am normally all in favor of. But she corrects the officer when he refers to them as bunnies. They are rabbits, of course. Because that increases the creepiness factor by ten.
Howie’s lodging is above a righteously rollicking pub. The locals sing and play about in the pub, and all seems normal.
Forward to the next scene. Holy unexpected nudity, Batman. I am glad my son chose to stay in his room and play Roblox. There are a bunch of naked locals openly copulating in and around the churchyard. Of course, it is later explained that it is not a churchyard, because poor, very stodgy, very Puritan Sergeant Howie has stumbled upon an island of RECKLESS HEATHEN PAGANS.
The lovely Britt Ekland portrays Willow, the barmaid. In a scene early on, she does a ritualistic dance in the nude, in the room next to the very tempted police officer. My boyfriend correctly observed that Howie should stay away from this woman, as she is clearly a siren. Her dance moves were odd to me, and at one point, I asked aloud, “What is she doing?” My boyfriend responded, “She’s twerking.”
The plot thickens like a good rabbit stew. Christopher Lee aptly portrays Lord Summerisle, the leader of the island. Summerisle makes some strange claims about the island, and says the women there get pregnant asexually by way of a ritual. This claim seems counterintuitive, since there seemed to be a lot of unprotected boinking going on by various members of the island, in the open air no less. But hey, maybe these adulterated pagans missed the lecture on the birds and the bees.
As a heathen myself, I didn’t find this movie too horrific until it neared the end. I was more focused on Sergeant Howie’s unwillingness to entertain a faith other than his own. The scenery was breathtaking, as it was filmed entirely on location in Scotland.
I’m not really going to spoil every detail of the ending. But I must observe that this is the strangest version of The 40-Year-Old Virgin I have ever seen.