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Lee (2222 KP) rated Rampage (2018) in Movies
Apr 13, 2018
Dwayne Johnson (2 more)
The Action
The Humour
Surprisingly enjoyable video game movie!
I have fond memories of playing the Rampage video game in my early teens. Me and my two brothers, huddled around my feeble ZX Spectrum, each of us taking control of one of three monsters. George the giant King-Kong style gorilla, Lizzie a dinosaur/Godzilla creature and Ralph the big wolf. The idea of the game was simple, but hugely satisfying - smash up city buildings until they collapse, while avoiding damage from the military who are out to stop you. Hitting your fellow monsters also takes out their energy, making it a great game for competitive brothers to be playing! Eating food you find, and even the soldiers trying to kill you, restores your energy. Lots of fun.
Rampage the movie begins out in space, where genetic editing experiments too dangerous/illegal are taking place onboard a space station. Things have gone badly wrong though and canisters containing an experimental genetic pathogen begin hurtling towards North America in what looks like a meteor shower. Back down on Earth we're introduced to Davis Okoye (Dwayne Johnson) - San Diego zoologist, ex-military (so, comfortable with guns, flying helicopters etc, could come in handy later...) and general all-round cool guy. In his care is an albino gorilla called George, who was rescued from poachers as a baby by Davis. They've built up a special bond ever since, communicating in sign language to the level where they are able to joke and generally take the piss out of each other. Overnight, one of the space canisters lands in the zoo and is released into the face of an inquisitive (or Curious?) George. From there he begins to grow bigger, and become increasingly violent.
Elsewhere, two other canisters have landed out in the wild. One right by a pack of wolves and another hitting a lake. The brother and sister team heading up Energyne, the company responsible for the space station and the genetic work (Malin Åkerman and Jake Lacy), dispatch a bunch of clean up guys with big guns to try and apprehend the wolf, which ends up going badly. Meanwhile, an ex employee of Energyne, Dr Kate Caldwell (Naomie Harris), who is also responsible for creating the pathogen, heads to the zoo. She wants to make amends for everything and bring down the company that fired her. Government agent Harvey Russell (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) also shows up at the zoo with a bunch of men of his own, looking to take George away by plane - something else which you just know is going to end badly. Morgan plays Harvey Russell as basically just a slightly toned down version of his Walking Dead character, Negan. Grinning cockily throughout the whole movie and when he first squares up to Davis, you fully expect him to start swaggering around, monologuing about swinging dicks or something. He tells Davis that "when science shits the bed, I'm the guy they call to change the sheets"!
The three monsters begin making their way to Chicago to start smashing stuff up, attracted by a beacon emitting a sound only they can hear. Something "the tech guys rustled up overnight" at Energyne. Davis and Dr Caldwell also head to Chicago to try and help George and end the destruction, eventually aided by Harvey Russell.
Rampage has the potential to be a trainwreck, another casualty in the long line of awful video game movies, especially when there are so many CGI-heavy monster-city-smash movies out there these days. It all works surprisingly well though. When the monsters begin trashing things, it's not an over the top assault on the senses where you can't even make out any sign of human life and the affect that all of this is having on them. The action is well done and enjoyable, and peppered with plenty of trademark Dwayne Johnson humour too. Outside of the action, it's also Johnson that holds the rest of the movie together and prevents it from dipping below average. Dr Caldwell is a very underused and forgettable character, serving only as sidekick to The Rock. Everyone else, aside from Harvey Russell, is also pretty forgettable too. But then at the end of the day, this is all about George and his monster buddies, and overall I found this to be a very enjoyable movie.
Rampage the movie begins out in space, where genetic editing experiments too dangerous/illegal are taking place onboard a space station. Things have gone badly wrong though and canisters containing an experimental genetic pathogen begin hurtling towards North America in what looks like a meteor shower. Back down on Earth we're introduced to Davis Okoye (Dwayne Johnson) - San Diego zoologist, ex-military (so, comfortable with guns, flying helicopters etc, could come in handy later...) and general all-round cool guy. In his care is an albino gorilla called George, who was rescued from poachers as a baby by Davis. They've built up a special bond ever since, communicating in sign language to the level where they are able to joke and generally take the piss out of each other. Overnight, one of the space canisters lands in the zoo and is released into the face of an inquisitive (or Curious?) George. From there he begins to grow bigger, and become increasingly violent.
Elsewhere, two other canisters have landed out in the wild. One right by a pack of wolves and another hitting a lake. The brother and sister team heading up Energyne, the company responsible for the space station and the genetic work (Malin Åkerman and Jake Lacy), dispatch a bunch of clean up guys with big guns to try and apprehend the wolf, which ends up going badly. Meanwhile, an ex employee of Energyne, Dr Kate Caldwell (Naomie Harris), who is also responsible for creating the pathogen, heads to the zoo. She wants to make amends for everything and bring down the company that fired her. Government agent Harvey Russell (Jeffrey Dean Morgan) also shows up at the zoo with a bunch of men of his own, looking to take George away by plane - something else which you just know is going to end badly. Morgan plays Harvey Russell as basically just a slightly toned down version of his Walking Dead character, Negan. Grinning cockily throughout the whole movie and when he first squares up to Davis, you fully expect him to start swaggering around, monologuing about swinging dicks or something. He tells Davis that "when science shits the bed, I'm the guy they call to change the sheets"!
The three monsters begin making their way to Chicago to start smashing stuff up, attracted by a beacon emitting a sound only they can hear. Something "the tech guys rustled up overnight" at Energyne. Davis and Dr Caldwell also head to Chicago to try and help George and end the destruction, eventually aided by Harvey Russell.
Rampage has the potential to be a trainwreck, another casualty in the long line of awful video game movies, especially when there are so many CGI-heavy monster-city-smash movies out there these days. It all works surprisingly well though. When the monsters begin trashing things, it's not an over the top assault on the senses where you can't even make out any sign of human life and the affect that all of this is having on them. The action is well done and enjoyable, and peppered with plenty of trademark Dwayne Johnson humour too. Outside of the action, it's also Johnson that holds the rest of the movie together and prevents it from dipping below average. Dr Caldwell is a very underused and forgettable character, serving only as sidekick to The Rock. Everyone else, aside from Harvey Russell, is also pretty forgettable too. But then at the end of the day, this is all about George and his monster buddies, and overall I found this to be a very enjoyable movie.
Gareth von Kallenbach (965 KP) rated Arthur (2011) in Movies
Aug 7, 2019
Arthur Bach is a spoiled, boyish, alcoholic, New York City playboy with amazing hair and heir to the family business and fortune. He and his faithful sidekick Bitterman travel far and wide to have fun and drink. Well, Arthur drinks, Bitterman drives. He is also very dependent on his nanny Hobson who has been with him since he was born and still takes care of him. One day his mother Vivienne decides she’s had it with his antics, embarrassing her and the family company, so she gives him an ultimatum: either he marries Susan Johnson or he will be cut-off and have to fend for himself on the mean streets of New York City.
Though he doesn’t love Susan, he eventually decides to go along with his mother’s wishes and propose to her. But during this time he also meets the enchanting Naomi, an unlicensed tour guide of Grand Central Terminal who has dreams of being a children’s author. As the wedding day draws nearer and nearer, Arthur and Naomi grow closer and closer. Then tragedy strikes. How this affects Arthur could change his entire life. Does he marry Susan and keep his wealth but gain the world’s scariest father-in-law? Does he choose the mean streets of New York City to be with Naomi? Or do he and Bitterman jump into the Batmobile and drive off into the sunset?
This remake of the 1981 movie Arthur honored the wonderful story that many of us know and love from the original film while still possessing its own unique flair. I believe Dudley Moore would have been very happy with Russell Brand’s excellent performance as Arthur Bach (if you disagree, hold a seance and prove me wrong). Helen Mirren does an amazing job as Hobson and she pretty much owns any scene she is in. Nick Nolte & Jennifer Garner were great as Burt (world’s scariest future father-in-law) and Susan Johnson (Arthur’s total-10-on-the-L.A.-scale) fiancee. Last but not least, I thoroughly enjoyed the performances of: Greta Gerwig as Naomi (Arthur’s love interest), Geraldine James as Vivienne Bach (Arthur’s Mom) and Luis Guzman as Bitterman his faithful sidekick and chauffeur (though I do wish Luis would have been given more screen time). The film definitely kept the audiences attention from start to finish but we were all laughing so much that I have to see it again to hear the jokes that I missed the first time.
If you were sober when you saw the original movie you probably remember the key parts of the story line but if not then this movie will seem like an entirely original movie to you.
Though he doesn’t love Susan, he eventually decides to go along with his mother’s wishes and propose to her. But during this time he also meets the enchanting Naomi, an unlicensed tour guide of Grand Central Terminal who has dreams of being a children’s author. As the wedding day draws nearer and nearer, Arthur and Naomi grow closer and closer. Then tragedy strikes. How this affects Arthur could change his entire life. Does he marry Susan and keep his wealth but gain the world’s scariest father-in-law? Does he choose the mean streets of New York City to be with Naomi? Or do he and Bitterman jump into the Batmobile and drive off into the sunset?
This remake of the 1981 movie Arthur honored the wonderful story that many of us know and love from the original film while still possessing its own unique flair. I believe Dudley Moore would have been very happy with Russell Brand’s excellent performance as Arthur Bach (if you disagree, hold a seance and prove me wrong). Helen Mirren does an amazing job as Hobson and she pretty much owns any scene she is in. Nick Nolte & Jennifer Garner were great as Burt (world’s scariest future father-in-law) and Susan Johnson (Arthur’s total-10-on-the-L.A.-scale) fiancee. Last but not least, I thoroughly enjoyed the performances of: Greta Gerwig as Naomi (Arthur’s love interest), Geraldine James as Vivienne Bach (Arthur’s Mom) and Luis Guzman as Bitterman his faithful sidekick and chauffeur (though I do wish Luis would have been given more screen time). The film definitely kept the audiences attention from start to finish but we were all laughing so much that I have to see it again to hear the jokes that I missed the first time.
If you were sober when you saw the original movie you probably remember the key parts of the story line but if not then this movie will seem like an entirely original movie to you.
Joe Elliott recommended Every Picture Tells a Story by Rod Stewart in Music (curated)
Movie Metropolis (309 KP) rated The Mummy (2017) in Movies
Jun 10, 2019
A new franchise is reborn
It seems that the Marvel Cinematic Universe has kicked off a trend over in tinseltown. Shared franchises are all the rage at the moment, and why not. Marvel has taken over $10billion. DC has finally found its footing with Wonder Woman and Legendary are fusing Godzilla with Kong: Skull Island to create their own monster universe.
But for every success story there is a failed series that didn’t quite grab the cinema-going public with The Golden Compass and The Last Airbender immediately springing to mind. Nevertheless, Universal Pictures has pushed ahead with creating its own ‘Dark Universe’. Proceedings kick off with The Mummy. But how does this reboot fare?
Nick Morton (Tom Cruise) is a soldier of fortune who plunders ancient sites for timeless artefacts and sells them to the highest bidder. When Nick and his partner (Jake Johnson) come under attack in the Middle East, the ensuing battle accidentally unearths Ahmanet, a betrayed Egyptian princess (Sofia Boutella) who was entombed under the desert for thousands of years. With her powers constantly evolving, Morton must now stop the resurrected monster as she embarks on a furious rampage through the streets of London.
First-time director and long-time screenwriter Alex Kurtzman crafts a film that moves at breakneck speed, features a lot of nifty set-pieces and is an intriguing precursor to the next instalment of the franchise. It’s pretty good fun to be honest.
Tom Cruise is as reliable as ever, and does all the Tom Cruise staples; running, heavy breathing, shirtless preening, but the stand-out performance here is Russell Crowe’s Dr. Henry Jekyll (yes, that’s right). Despite being slightly underused, Crowe is a fantastic choice to play this multi-layered character. Elsewhere, Sofia Boutella is very good as Ahmanet.
Unfortunately, Jake Johnson (Jurassic World) and Cruise’s love interest Annabelle Wallis (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword) feel miscast with Wallis in particular having no believable chemistry with her co-star.
To look at The Mummy is first-rate. Gone are the campy special effects of the Brendan Fraser-era films, instead replaced with crisp CGI – though the dark and gloomy filming style hampers the obviously great effects. Nevertheless, the aircraft and subsequent crash sequences that have been marketed in the trailers are gripping and produced very well indeed.
Unfortunately, The Mummy relies heavily on jump scares, of which there are far too many, and the trade-off for that rollercoaster pace is a film that feels disjointed, relying on visually stunning action sequences to cover over cracks in the story. Some of the humour also falls flat.
Ultimately though, these are small gripes in a vastly entertaining popcorn flick that is a very solid starting point to a series that will include films like The Invisible Man, Bride of Frankenstein and The Wolfman.
Whilst not the most original film you will see this year, The Mummy opens up some intriguing doors and whilst I’m in no rush to see it again, despite its competence, I’m excited to see how Universal will bring all of their iconic monsters back to the big screen in one unified franchise.
https://moviemetropolis.net/2017/06/10/a-new-franchise-is-reborn-the-mummy-review/
But for every success story there is a failed series that didn’t quite grab the cinema-going public with The Golden Compass and The Last Airbender immediately springing to mind. Nevertheless, Universal Pictures has pushed ahead with creating its own ‘Dark Universe’. Proceedings kick off with The Mummy. But how does this reboot fare?
Nick Morton (Tom Cruise) is a soldier of fortune who plunders ancient sites for timeless artefacts and sells them to the highest bidder. When Nick and his partner (Jake Johnson) come under attack in the Middle East, the ensuing battle accidentally unearths Ahmanet, a betrayed Egyptian princess (Sofia Boutella) who was entombed under the desert for thousands of years. With her powers constantly evolving, Morton must now stop the resurrected monster as she embarks on a furious rampage through the streets of London.
First-time director and long-time screenwriter Alex Kurtzman crafts a film that moves at breakneck speed, features a lot of nifty set-pieces and is an intriguing precursor to the next instalment of the franchise. It’s pretty good fun to be honest.
Tom Cruise is as reliable as ever, and does all the Tom Cruise staples; running, heavy breathing, shirtless preening, but the stand-out performance here is Russell Crowe’s Dr. Henry Jekyll (yes, that’s right). Despite being slightly underused, Crowe is a fantastic choice to play this multi-layered character. Elsewhere, Sofia Boutella is very good as Ahmanet.
Unfortunately, Jake Johnson (Jurassic World) and Cruise’s love interest Annabelle Wallis (King Arthur: Legend of the Sword) feel miscast with Wallis in particular having no believable chemistry with her co-star.
To look at The Mummy is first-rate. Gone are the campy special effects of the Brendan Fraser-era films, instead replaced with crisp CGI – though the dark and gloomy filming style hampers the obviously great effects. Nevertheless, the aircraft and subsequent crash sequences that have been marketed in the trailers are gripping and produced very well indeed.
Unfortunately, The Mummy relies heavily on jump scares, of which there are far too many, and the trade-off for that rollercoaster pace is a film that feels disjointed, relying on visually stunning action sequences to cover over cracks in the story. Some of the humour also falls flat.
Ultimately though, these are small gripes in a vastly entertaining popcorn flick that is a very solid starting point to a series that will include films like The Invisible Man, Bride of Frankenstein and The Wolfman.
Whilst not the most original film you will see this year, The Mummy opens up some intriguing doors and whilst I’m in no rush to see it again, despite its competence, I’m excited to see how Universal will bring all of their iconic monsters back to the big screen in one unified franchise.
https://moviemetropolis.net/2017/06/10/a-new-franchise-is-reborn-the-mummy-review/
Gareth von Kallenbach (965 KP) rated Rampage (2018) in Movies
Jun 19, 2019
I have long written about the troubled history of bringing video game movies to the screen. For every success such as “Resident Evil” there are failures such as “Super Mario Bros”, “Wing Commander”, “DOOM”, and countless others. In recent years studios have taken more control of films based on their titles and we have seen some better success at least from a financial point. I was on set and very briefly in “Postal” and “Far Cry” and between scenes it was explained to me that with many video game films, you can use names and a basic premise from the game, but visuals, scenarios and such are usually forbidden as they cannot follow past stories or impede on any possible new projects. What is left is usually something with the name of the game and a very loose association.
“Tomb Raider” and “Assassin’s Creed” recently had a solid box office and while “Warcraft” fizzled domestically it did well overseas but not enough to trigger a sequel but showed an upward trend of star power and bigger budgets for game related films.
All of which brings us to “Rampage”; which is based on a classic arcade game which spawned version on multiple gaming platforms and sequels over the years.
The movie stars Dwayne Johnson as Davis Okoye; a former military operative who joined an anti-poaching task force and now resides in San Diego caring for Primates. His associates note that he has a better relationship with the animals in his care than he does the people around him and Davis is more than fine with this.
His favorite animal is an Albino Gorilla named George and Davis has even managed to teach him and other members of the group to speak to him via sign language.
All seems well until debris from a satellite crashes into George’s enclosure one night as well as various locales around the country.
George begins to grow at an alarming rate and shows increased aggression which is troubling to Davis and draws the attention of a genetics company who are involved in a rogue genetics experiment and a disgraced scientist named Dr. Kate Caldwell (Naomie Harris) who strive to help George and get control of the situation. Naturally the people behind the experiment are not going to let this happen and involve Government Agent Russell (Jeffrey Dean Morgan), to transport them all to a secure locale.
Naturally things do not go as planned and with multiple creatures now on the loose and heading to Chicago, and the military powerless to stop the carnage, it is up to Davis to save George and save the day.
The film uses some lavish visuals to depict the creatures and the action scenes are very entertaining. For a game with a very basic premise, it was nice to see the attempt made to flesh out the backstory and characters and not make the film just an extended FX reel.
There are some scenes and lines that would not be appropriate for younger viewers as a couple at our screener seemed to have some issues with the intensity at times. That being said, “Rampage” delivers an over the top, campy, and fully entertaining mix of video games and classic monster movies. The strong cast and great effects make for an enjoyable action film as long as you accept things with a wink and a smile. I hope this is a success as I would love to see a future film in the series and Johnson, Morgan, and Harris were a very winning combination.
http://sknr.net/2018/04/11/rampage/
“Tomb Raider” and “Assassin’s Creed” recently had a solid box office and while “Warcraft” fizzled domestically it did well overseas but not enough to trigger a sequel but showed an upward trend of star power and bigger budgets for game related films.
All of which brings us to “Rampage”; which is based on a classic arcade game which spawned version on multiple gaming platforms and sequels over the years.
The movie stars Dwayne Johnson as Davis Okoye; a former military operative who joined an anti-poaching task force and now resides in San Diego caring for Primates. His associates note that he has a better relationship with the animals in his care than he does the people around him and Davis is more than fine with this.
His favorite animal is an Albino Gorilla named George and Davis has even managed to teach him and other members of the group to speak to him via sign language.
All seems well until debris from a satellite crashes into George’s enclosure one night as well as various locales around the country.
George begins to grow at an alarming rate and shows increased aggression which is troubling to Davis and draws the attention of a genetics company who are involved in a rogue genetics experiment and a disgraced scientist named Dr. Kate Caldwell (Naomie Harris) who strive to help George and get control of the situation. Naturally the people behind the experiment are not going to let this happen and involve Government Agent Russell (Jeffrey Dean Morgan), to transport them all to a secure locale.
Naturally things do not go as planned and with multiple creatures now on the loose and heading to Chicago, and the military powerless to stop the carnage, it is up to Davis to save George and save the day.
The film uses some lavish visuals to depict the creatures and the action scenes are very entertaining. For a game with a very basic premise, it was nice to see the attempt made to flesh out the backstory and characters and not make the film just an extended FX reel.
There are some scenes and lines that would not be appropriate for younger viewers as a couple at our screener seemed to have some issues with the intensity at times. That being said, “Rampage” delivers an over the top, campy, and fully entertaining mix of video games and classic monster movies. The strong cast and great effects make for an enjoyable action film as long as you accept things with a wink and a smile. I hope this is a success as I would love to see a future film in the series and Johnson, Morgan, and Harris were a very winning combination.
http://sknr.net/2018/04/11/rampage/
Bob Mann (459 KP) rated The Fate of the Furious (2017) in Movies
Sep 29, 2021
Blood is thicker than Diesel.
All work and no play makes bob-the-movie-man a tardy reviewer. Still, what better way to break the fast than with “Fast and Furious 8” (aka “The Fate of the Furious”)?
Well, quite a lot of things actually!
Now, I have a confession to make (and I know for some this will be the equivalent of an appalling statement like “I’ve never seen Star Wars”). I have actually never ever seen Fast and Furious 1 through 7! (If it’s any mitigation to this cinematic crime, I did see the F-and-F wannabe “Need for Speed“).
So I was going to be completely lost with the “plot” right? Well actually, no. It was pretty easy to jump in and follow as a piece of popcorn nonsense.
The M25 water main burst was a real bitch for the Monday morning rush-hour.
For nonsense it is (hence the “rabbit ears” round the word “plot” above). The story isn’t just a bit far-fetched. It’s bat-shit crazy where the bat in question has downed a questionable vindaloo two hours earlier!
Dom (Vin Diesel) has turned on his “family”, including his squeeze, the lovely Letty (Michelle Rodriguez), and Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson, “San Andreas“), to team with the above-the-law (and above the clouds) cyber-super-terrorist Cipher (Charlize Theron, “Mad Max: Fury Road“). They have teamed up, apparently, for no other reason than to allow Cipher to ‘kick some global ass’ with a nuclear threat. But given his caring and sharing side, why the sudden betrayal of his nearest and dearest by Dom?
Ice Queen Metallica fan Theron, showing off her hardware.
Where do you begin with the nonsensical story? Jumping from Cuba (with some admittedly fun scenes, but shamelessly objectifying scantily-clad women) via Berlin and New York to the icy wastes of Siberia, it’s just an excuse to show fast cars doing ludicrously unlikely things. There is zero logic within any of the script. Here are just a handful of examples:
the team know (through enormous jumps of speculation) to be present at a particular location in the world and at exactly the time that Dom is there (arrive, look through binoculars, “Oh, there he is”!);
all cars can be automatically hijacked and remotely driven (who knew), but NOT those of the team (obviously);
fast cars/tanks/etc can be magicked from New York to Siberia (wot, no Hertz Siberia available?);
Russian nuclear codes are stolen, so obviously they can’t be changed?
a nuclear submarine is out of the water on wooden blocks, but spin the propeller really REALLY fast and it can suddenly be sailing away.
Muscle for muscle it never looked like being a fair fight.
I appreciate I am being enormously po-faced about this, and this is designed as pure escapism. But is there REALLY any need for this to be such mindless escapism? The director (Gary Gray, “The Italian Job”) and writer (Chris Morgan, responsible for parts 6 and 7) should credit their audience with rather more in the way of intelligence.
Diesel and Johnson are never going to set the acting ablaze, but Rodriquez (“Lost”) is as watchable as ever. Theron has fun with her villainy and the supporting turns by Tyrese Gibson and Ludacris are enjoyable. Nathalie Emmanuel though as Ramsey seems as uncomfortable with her “sexy English” stereotype as she should be.
A long way from Brookside. Nathalie Emmanuel uncomfortable as “the sexy one”.
Luke Evans (“The Hobbit“), Kurt Russell (“Deepwater Horizon“) and Helen Mirren (“Eye in the Sky“) turn up in entertaining but underused cameos, but it is Jason Statham as Deckard that has the most fun in the whole film, and his scenes – done largely for comic effect – are the best part of the movie. (But “math” Jason? “MATH”?? I hope your old maths teacher back in London doesn’t get to see this film).
Parking enforcement by the City Council was getting more and more stringent.
If you’re willing to park your brain at the door for two hours then it has some fun moments. But I felt the damage to my IQ might not have been worth the risk, and this really didn’t fill my cinematic tank.
Well, quite a lot of things actually!
Now, I have a confession to make (and I know for some this will be the equivalent of an appalling statement like “I’ve never seen Star Wars”). I have actually never ever seen Fast and Furious 1 through 7! (If it’s any mitigation to this cinematic crime, I did see the F-and-F wannabe “Need for Speed“).
So I was going to be completely lost with the “plot” right? Well actually, no. It was pretty easy to jump in and follow as a piece of popcorn nonsense.
The M25 water main burst was a real bitch for the Monday morning rush-hour.
For nonsense it is (hence the “rabbit ears” round the word “plot” above). The story isn’t just a bit far-fetched. It’s bat-shit crazy where the bat in question has downed a questionable vindaloo two hours earlier!
Dom (Vin Diesel) has turned on his “family”, including his squeeze, the lovely Letty (Michelle Rodriguez), and Hobbs (Dwayne Johnson, “San Andreas“), to team with the above-the-law (and above the clouds) cyber-super-terrorist Cipher (Charlize Theron, “Mad Max: Fury Road“). They have teamed up, apparently, for no other reason than to allow Cipher to ‘kick some global ass’ with a nuclear threat. But given his caring and sharing side, why the sudden betrayal of his nearest and dearest by Dom?
Ice Queen Metallica fan Theron, showing off her hardware.
Where do you begin with the nonsensical story? Jumping from Cuba (with some admittedly fun scenes, but shamelessly objectifying scantily-clad women) via Berlin and New York to the icy wastes of Siberia, it’s just an excuse to show fast cars doing ludicrously unlikely things. There is zero logic within any of the script. Here are just a handful of examples:
the team know (through enormous jumps of speculation) to be present at a particular location in the world and at exactly the time that Dom is there (arrive, look through binoculars, “Oh, there he is”!);
all cars can be automatically hijacked and remotely driven (who knew), but NOT those of the team (obviously);
fast cars/tanks/etc can be magicked from New York to Siberia (wot, no Hertz Siberia available?);
Russian nuclear codes are stolen, so obviously they can’t be changed?
a nuclear submarine is out of the water on wooden blocks, but spin the propeller really REALLY fast and it can suddenly be sailing away.
Muscle for muscle it never looked like being a fair fight.
I appreciate I am being enormously po-faced about this, and this is designed as pure escapism. But is there REALLY any need for this to be such mindless escapism? The director (Gary Gray, “The Italian Job”) and writer (Chris Morgan, responsible for parts 6 and 7) should credit their audience with rather more in the way of intelligence.
Diesel and Johnson are never going to set the acting ablaze, but Rodriquez (“Lost”) is as watchable as ever. Theron has fun with her villainy and the supporting turns by Tyrese Gibson and Ludacris are enjoyable. Nathalie Emmanuel though as Ramsey seems as uncomfortable with her “sexy English” stereotype as she should be.
A long way from Brookside. Nathalie Emmanuel uncomfortable as “the sexy one”.
Luke Evans (“The Hobbit“), Kurt Russell (“Deepwater Horizon“) and Helen Mirren (“Eye in the Sky“) turn up in entertaining but underused cameos, but it is Jason Statham as Deckard that has the most fun in the whole film, and his scenes – done largely for comic effect – are the best part of the movie. (But “math” Jason? “MATH”?? I hope your old maths teacher back in London doesn’t get to see this film).
Parking enforcement by the City Council was getting more and more stringent.
If you’re willing to park your brain at the door for two hours then it has some fun moments. But I felt the damage to my IQ might not have been worth the risk, and this really didn’t fill my cinematic tank.
BankofMarquis (1832 KP) rated Fast & Furious 9 (2021) in Movies
Jul 24, 2021
Enjoyable...enough
If you have any interest in checking out F9:THE FAST SAGA, then you have seen at least 1 (if not more) of the other 9 films in this series - and you pretty much know what to expect.
And this film delivers on that expectation - no more, no less.
Director Justin Lin - a veteran of these films - knows what needs to happen in this series. So we get fast cars, macho men, kick-ass women, super villains and over-the-top stunts and situations. All brought to us with a wink and a shrug. Unapologetic about the absurdities that we are viewing (not to spoil, but I don’t think magnets really work the way they work in this film) and “upping the ante” at every turn.
This film largely delivers…if not spectacularly. The action sequences (which is really why we watch these films) are “good enough”. Nothing really new here, but I caught myself cackling at the events on the screen from time to time.
The “family” is back together and Vin Diesel & Michelle Rodriguez are the pseudo Mom and Dad of this ragtag group of heroes that include the smart one (Game Of Thrones’ Nathalie Emanuel) and the wise guys (Chris “Ludicrous” Bridges and Tyrese Gibson) - who know exactly what type of film they are making and what their roles in this film are as well as the “emotional center”, Jordana Brewster. All of these deliver their wooden lines with gritty resolve while clenching their jaws during their close-ups during the action scenes.
There also is a boatload of cameos from veterans of previous Fast and Furious films from the likes of Kurt Russell, Helen Mirren, Lucas Black, Shea Wigham and Charlize Theron as well as brief appearances by “newcomers” like Michael Rooker and Cardi B. They all join in on the fun at the appropriate level and look like they are having a good time.
The biggest disappointment for me was John Cena as the main villain in this piece. He just wasn’t “villainous” enough and came off pretty generic and “meh” - never a good thing for a bad guy in these types of films.
Oh…and there is a “surprise return” by a presumably thought dead character, that is no surprise at all, since his face is shown prominently in the advertisements for this film. I won’t spoil it for you here, but he does bring some needed energy to this film. Which leads me to speculate that Gal Gadot will probably show up in the next film (her character was killed off many Fast and Furious films ago when she started becoming a SuperStar).
Ultimately, what is missing from F9 is some “fun energy”. Something that…oh…a good villain…or someone like…Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson would bring. But, alas, “The Rock” and Vin Diesel did not get along in their previous outings together, so we will need to limp along with what we have.
Which is what the 10th film in this Universe ultimately does - limp along just good enough to be enjoyable, but not more than that, which makes F9 neither Fast nor Furious.
Letter Grade: B
7 stars (out of 10) and you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis)
And this film delivers on that expectation - no more, no less.
Director Justin Lin - a veteran of these films - knows what needs to happen in this series. So we get fast cars, macho men, kick-ass women, super villains and over-the-top stunts and situations. All brought to us with a wink and a shrug. Unapologetic about the absurdities that we are viewing (not to spoil, but I don’t think magnets really work the way they work in this film) and “upping the ante” at every turn.
This film largely delivers…if not spectacularly. The action sequences (which is really why we watch these films) are “good enough”. Nothing really new here, but I caught myself cackling at the events on the screen from time to time.
The “family” is back together and Vin Diesel & Michelle Rodriguez are the pseudo Mom and Dad of this ragtag group of heroes that include the smart one (Game Of Thrones’ Nathalie Emanuel) and the wise guys (Chris “Ludicrous” Bridges and Tyrese Gibson) - who know exactly what type of film they are making and what their roles in this film are as well as the “emotional center”, Jordana Brewster. All of these deliver their wooden lines with gritty resolve while clenching their jaws during their close-ups during the action scenes.
There also is a boatload of cameos from veterans of previous Fast and Furious films from the likes of Kurt Russell, Helen Mirren, Lucas Black, Shea Wigham and Charlize Theron as well as brief appearances by “newcomers” like Michael Rooker and Cardi B. They all join in on the fun at the appropriate level and look like they are having a good time.
The biggest disappointment for me was John Cena as the main villain in this piece. He just wasn’t “villainous” enough and came off pretty generic and “meh” - never a good thing for a bad guy in these types of films.
Oh…and there is a “surprise return” by a presumably thought dead character, that is no surprise at all, since his face is shown prominently in the advertisements for this film. I won’t spoil it for you here, but he does bring some needed energy to this film. Which leads me to speculate that Gal Gadot will probably show up in the next film (her character was killed off many Fast and Furious films ago when she started becoming a SuperStar).
Ultimately, what is missing from F9 is some “fun energy”. Something that…oh…a good villain…or someone like…Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson would bring. But, alas, “The Rock” and Vin Diesel did not get along in their previous outings together, so we will need to limp along with what we have.
Which is what the 10th film in this Universe ultimately does - limp along just good enough to be enjoyable, but not more than that, which makes F9 neither Fast nor Furious.
Letter Grade: B
7 stars (out of 10) and you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis)