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Hottest Blood: The Ultimate in Erotic Horror
Hottest Blood: The Ultimate in Erotic Horror
Jeff Gelb | 1993 | Erotica, Horror
1
5.0 (3 Ratings)
Book Rating
Shelf Life – Hottest Blood: The Ultimate in Erotic Horror is Neither of Those Things
(I’m gonna go ahead and throw a disclaimer on up here: You are about to read something that deals with purportedly “erotic” subject matter. If you don’t like the sound of that word, you might wanna go elsewhere. If it’s actually-erotic things that offend you, though, you’ll be fine.)

I like short story compilations because you get a variety of content that’s just as easy to breeze through if you have the time as it is to get to a stopping point and put down if you don’t. I like horror fiction because it usually involves the super-natural, which interests me, and intense emotional responses, which are almost always a good thing in writing. And I like eroticism because I am a warm-blooded human being with a pulse. However, on the whole, I do not like Hottest Blood.

I wanted to, I did. Look at that cover. It’s equal amounts scary and sexy, both in completely safe, PG-13-at-most kind of ways. Unfortunately, Softcore Succubus here is both the scariest and the sexiest thing about this book

Bluntly analogized, you know that feeling you get when you come across something on the internet that disturbs and/or disgusts you, and then you learn that there’s a dedicated group of people that gets off on it? Most of the stories in this book are that feeling captured in words.

Case in point, the story “Damaged Goods” by Elizabeth Massie, which as far as I can tell is about a couple of physically abused, emotionally damaged, developmentally stunted kids somewhere around their early teens who live with a religious fringe cult being led out to a field to have sex with each other while a nameless U.S. President watches and masturbates before both kids are drowned in a river by their preacher/pimp caretaker.

Or there’s “Mr. Right” by Chris Lacher, which tells the story of a college student named Russ who has a secret fetish for the deformed women in the freak show at a nearby carnival – a fascination which leads to him getting held down and forcibly raped by a group of unwashed subhuman mutants, which the detailed descriptions make sure you understand are completely revolting to all five senses. The story ends with him being dumped out behind the fairgrounds while a small, legless girl happily informs him that this is how all carnival workers reproduce, and he can look forward to seeing his own mutant rape-spawn in the show next year.

Or there’s “Abuse” by Matthew Costello, which simply shows us how the arrest of a Peewee Herman surrogate goes down in an adult movie theater before ending with another man jerking off with the cold, dry, severed hand in his pocket as he contemplates getting a new one to replace it.

The tone of these three are pretty much par for the course for the rest of the book: thoroughly disturbing, and sex is involved, but the disturbing feeling stems from revulsion rather than fear, and the sex bits are so far on the other end of the spectrum from erotic that it feels like the authors are trying to punish their readers for even expecting to be aroused in any way.

Of course, I said myself earlier that intense emotional responses are “almost always a good thing in writing.” By that merit alone, this book technically succeeds; in fact, if it had billed itself as shock fiction instead of erotic horror, I’d begrudgingly give it a medal in its class. The “aw, what the hell?!” moments are not as artistically executed as, say, a Chuck Palahniuk read, and they tend not to have as much depth to them, but strictly in terms of making you wish that you could unread words, they get the job done.

But that isn’t the job that Hottest Blood was hired to do, and that’s not what it put on its resume. It said it was going to “heat the blood and chill the mind,” and promised that “terror never felt this sexy!” It would have been more appropriate to say that “sex never felt this terrible.”

All of that said, if you abandon any hope of seeing anything resembling erotica or horror (scary horror, anyway), there are a few stories in here that are decent reads – mostly because they try to say something with their subject matter rather than use it to see how thoroughly they can ruin the idea of sex for the reader. To give a few quick nods of approval:

Nancy Holder’s “I Hear the Mermaids Singing,” which opens the anthology, is a dark and modern re-imagining of “The Little Mermaid” that brutally points up the drawbacks to throwing away your whole life and family in order to pursue someone that you know nothing about outside of a few fleeting glimpses and lustful inner fantasies.

J.L. Comeau’s “Black Cars” is the narrative of a high-class chauffeur as he tells his passenger an increasingly mysterious story about a couple of his regular customers, culminating in a creepy twist payoff that, in retrospect, actually makes it count as a legitimate horror story, and a decently gripping one at that.

And “Safe at Home” by Steve and Melanie Tem, while decidedly and disturbingly unsexy, at least has good reason to be; it’s a short character study of a young woman who’d been molested as a child, and the lasting and complex psychological damage resulting thereof that prevents her from having any normal social life or relationships, even with someone whom she legitimately likes, someone who knows what’s happened and sincerely cares for her.

So for the handful of intriguing stories that don’t make you quit (or wish you had) mid-read out of revolted disappointment, I can’t completely condemn Hottest Blood. If you want to test your own threshold for repulsion but are understandably hesitant to use online image searches to this end, I heartily recommend it.

If you are legitimately turned on by the idea of a man eating a woman alive and then gestating her alien spawn inside his own bloated body until his head detaches and crawls away (“How Deep the Taste of Love,” John Shirley), I suppose I still heartily recommend it, though I do so from a safe distance.

If you want to read one of the few stories involved that aren’t horrible, I heartily recommend trying to find them on their own somewhere else first.

But if you want “the ultimate in erotic horror,” stay the hell away. Softcore Succubus is a trap.
  
NO
None of the Above
10
9.0 (4 Ratings)
Book Rating
*I received a copy of this book from Netgalley and the Publisher in exchange for an honest review*

This book has been out for sometime and I have always been intrigued about it but never actually took the plunge until I saw it being offeredon Netgalley to read due to it being reprinted in paperback edition. This book was really good, I love contemporaries where something dramatic has happened in our protagonists life that is very different and only happens to a minority of people.

We follow Kristin, she is 17, in with the popular crowd at school and has been named prom queen…her life is fantastic and everything a teenage girl could want. She even has this boyfriend that’s really understanding and takes it slow and seems to be really into her. Kristin wants to take their relationship up another level and prom is the night! Except when that time arrives,it’s a lot more painful than expected…..so excruciating that she consults her gynecologist.

What Kristin learns at her appointment changes her life forever…. she was born intersex. Intersex is where you are born with both genitalia at birth.With this discovery we see how people react to her once her secret has been leaked and how she overcomes the negatives and start to look at the positives.

This story evoked so many emotions from me, I was shocked and angry at how people treated Kristin, the problem is people are scared of what they don’t know and they become ignorant to that persons feelings. There was sadness when it seemed like Kristin’s life was crumbling away and how her diagnosis had such an effect on her everyday life.

All the characters in this were great and I thought were all necessary for the plot – you had two best friends that were totally different from one another and she could confide with them for different things. There were the bullies which showed their utter stupidity and how harmful their remarks can be. We had the characters that treated Kristin exactly the same before her diagnosis and also other intersex characters which helped her through the process of coming to terms of her diagnosis.

I suspect a lot of people are questioning how she could not know that she was intersex, she had a female body and everything about her was feminine yet it was mostly her insides that were different and if you don’t know if anything is wrong how would you know to look for it.

Overall I thought this story sent out a great message and portrayal of intersex characters – if definitely made me want to find out more about the different types of intersex there are and how common/uncommon it is. I have never met an intersex person so I can’t say if this is an accurate portrayal but with all the emotions flowing it certainly felt like it.

I couldn’t find a fault with this book it had great characters, LGTBQ, great parents, Romance(but not too much) and was an informative, eye-opening read and definitely recommend if you are looking to read more diversely or want to read about intersex main characters.

I rated this 5 out of 5 stars
  
Made to Submit (La Trattoria Di Amore #3)
Made to Submit (La Trattoria Di Amore #3)
JP Sayle | 2021 | Contemporary, LGBTQ+, Romance
10
10.0 (2 Ratings)
Book Rating
I was surprised at this book, and I don't know why. I don't care, cos I loved it!
Independent reviewer for Archaeolibrarian, I was gifted my copy of this book.

This is book 3 in the La Trattoria Di Amore series, but it can be read as a stand alone. Indeed I am reading this one in the series first, and I didn't feel I missed anything. Something was cleared up from another book though, and I'll come back to that.

Paulo fell in love with Carl (book 2) at 15. He learned all he could about BDSM for Carl, and followed him to London a long time later, for carl to see the man he has become. But Carl has Adam, and Paulo is struggling. Being moved from one restaurant to another, to work under Kaden throws Paulo into a tailspin. Kaden has watched Paulo for a while. The young man does things to him that he didn't see coming. A simple taste test bring Paulo to Kaden's feet, and it's Kaden who is in a tail spin!

I started to read this book, just a few pages is the lie you tell yourself, before I had to get up and go about my day. Next thing, I've ran out of book and I have questions!

Questions, Ms Sayle, my mind has questions! However, I'm fully able to ask the single question I need to, but later. I thought you'd find that amusing :-)

Anyway, back to the book!

Oh, I loved this! Kaden needs to control everything, at work and at home. The guys he works with are attuned to his ways, but he's just a boss who likes things done just so, according to them. Paulo, however, makes Kaden want, so much. Want everything, if he's honest with himself, which at times, he isn't. Paulo brings out Kaden's Dom side, and Paulo? Oh Paulo is beautiful in his reaction to Kaden's words, his touches.

Paulo needs to work Carl out of his system, but very quickly Paulo realises that Carl was never really there. It was the IDEA of Carl, of what Carl could be for Paulo, that lodged all that long ago. And now Kaden has, quite literally, taken Paulo in hand, Paulo knows, he KNOWS that whatever he wanted with Carl would never be a patch on what Kaden can give him.

Paulo has been with other Doms before, but the level of control that Kaden needs is far higher than he had, but also, it's what he really needs. And it really is amazing watching these two find their footing, find their kink (which isn't as high a level as I was expecting, to be honest!) and to find out, what one takes, the other gives.

Back to my question! Does Smithy, Kaden's friend and mentor get a story? With Jesse, from the restaurant perhaps?? Jesse is hurting, and I want to know why!

And the point cleared up? Paulo appears in the Mine, Body and Soul trilogy. He's mean to Lenny in those books, and it was never cleared up why. I was curious. HERE, we get why. And you understand a bit better why Paulo treated Lenny the way he does.

I was surprised at this book, and I don't know why. I don't care, cos I loved it!

5 full and shiny stars

**same worded review will appear elsewhere**
  
Poison Study (Study, #1)
Poison Study (Study, #1)
Maria V. Snyder | 2005 | Fiction & Poetry
9
9.0 (13 Ratings)
Book Rating
world-building, characters, romance (0 more)
Shelf Life – The Chronicles of Ixia merits closer study
Contains spoilers, click to show
This review is for the entire Chronicles of Ixia series.

The first trilogy, comprised of Poison Study, Fire Study, and Magic Study, follows Yelena Zaltana. The second series, also called the Glass series, follows her friend Opal Cowan in Storm Glass, Sea Glass, and Spy Glass. The final trilogy, Shadow Study, Night Study, and Dawn Study, is where things get a bit odd. Maria V. Snyder had thrown in a few short stories/novellas throughout from different characters’ points of view. Perhaps she got bored of just sticking to one POV, or maybe fans wanted more from the other characters, so the third trilogy is from Yelena’s POV in first person and the POV’s of multiple characters (mainly Valek, Leif, and Janco, with a few others popping in from time to time) in third person.

I’m not sure which editor thought it would be a good idea to have POV switch from first person to third person in the same novel, but—yikes—is it jarring. Even with the wonky POV stuff in the third trilogy, these books are amazing and absolutely worth your time to read. Snyder’s world-building is compelling, detailed, and original. The books take place mostly between two pre-industrial countries: Ixia and Sitia. Ixia is a post-revolution country ruled by Commander Ambrose. His personal body guard and assassin is Valek. In the first novel Yelena is in prison for murder and is offered the choice to be the Commander’s food taster in exchange for her life. She agrees, and throughout the first book she and Valek begin to fall in love.

Ixia reminded me a lot of Communist Russia or China. In its attempts to throw away the corrupt government and society that came before, it has also thrown out all culture in the process. The country has been re-divided into districts with numbers instead of names, everyone is forced to wear a uniform, all art and extravagance has been destroyed, people have to have passes to travel between districts, and magic is forbidden. Anyone born with it is killed (or so the reader is led to believe). But Maria V. Snyder does a wonderful job of showing the good with the bad in this totalitarian dictatorship. Everyone has a job and nobody goes hungry, women are now equal to men, and violence and sexual assault are intolerable. This is why Yelena ends up in prison in the first place: she murdered the man that raped her. Now, this is probably my first major gripe with the series. We learn that Commander Ambrose loathes sexual assault and will execute anyone found guilty of it, but apparently killing a rapist in self-defense is also an executable offense. And all of that being said, Ambrose still has his own personal assassin. It all feels a bit contradictory, but again, that’s what I like about this series: it does an excellent job of peeling back the layers of her fictional societies and pointing out that governments and people in power tend to be hypocritical.

Now, the series name (or rather one of them) is Chronicles of Ixia, but honestly, it should have been called Chronicles of Sitia, because that is where most of the story takes place and is by far the more interesting and vibrant country. Sitia is part jungle, part desert, and full of magic. The peoples are divided into multiple clans or tribes that are all unique and compelling. In the second book, Yelena flees to Sitia after the Commander learns she has magic, and there she finds the family she was kidnapped from as a small child. They are part of the Zaltana clan, a group of people that live high in the trees in the jungle. Whenever I read about them, I would have to remind myself that they were not wood elves or dryads, because while there is magic in these books, there are no fantastical creatures: all characters are human or animal.

Another fascinating tribe is the Sandseeds, a group of nomads in the desert known for two major things: breeding super smart horses and having Storyweavers. The Storyweavers are people who have the magical ability to see the future and guide others, but who have to do it really cryptically because reasons (I appreciate that this gets pointed out by an annoyed Yelena multiple times). And of course, the Sandseed horses are fantastic; they choose their rider and able to mentally communicate with magical people. They even have their own horse names for people that they like.

Besides the different clans throughout Sitia, there is also the capitol, the Citadel, which is home to the magic school and the Sitian Council. While very different from Ixia, Sitia is by no means perfect. Its Council epitomizes everything annoying and dysfunctional about a bureaucracy. While the council members are elected and come from every clan in Sitia, they are at best useless and at worst actively impede the main characters.

The magic school is interesting, though the story doesn’t actually spend much time there. I like how magic was done in this series: it usually runs in families, most people with it have control over one or two things (ie. fire, mind-control, telepathy, etc.), but those who have the ability to master more can become Master Magicians after enduring a daunting trial. Magic is bound in people’s blood, so blood magic is a thing and is obviously bad, and magic (and a person’s soul) can be stolen using an intricate and gruesome blood ritual that involves prolonged torture, rape, and then murder.

The power blanket is another interesting concept used in this series. Essentially is resides over the entire world and is the essence of magic, so magicians can pull from it to augment their own magic. However, if they pull too much and lose control, they can flame out, killing themselves and temporarily damaging the blanket in the process. I thought this was a good literary tool to prevent magical characters from being too OP (at least most of the time).

I especially like the romantic relationships in this series. Valek and Yelena are of course the main couple. In the first book they fall in love, in the second book they get separated, and throughout the series they regularly cross paths and save one another. Yelena and Valek are heartmates, and as the series progresses they both have to mature and learn how to trust one another. My biggest complaint about the romance is that all sex scenes are just fade to black, which I personally find a bit boring.

The other major romantic relationship is between Opal and Devlen. This one was a bit awkward. Opal actually goes through a couple of guys first: a stormdancer named Kade and another glassmaker named Ulrick. And I really liked that the author included this. Many people have multiple partners before finding their soulmate, and a woman who does is not a slut. Her relationship with Devlen, however . . . Well, she’s a more forgiving person than me.

You see, it turns out that Devlen is the man who kidnapped Opal a few years earlier and tortured her because he was trying to steal her magic. But he didn’t actually enjoy torturing her and never raped her, which I guess makes it better? Well, he manages to switch bodies with Ulrick and, as Ulrick, tricks Opal into dating him, then, when he’s discovered, kidnaps and tortures her (again) to gain more power. But then she steals his magic, he spends some time in prison, and the combination of the two miraculously turn him into a good guy, claiming that magic is what made him evil in the first place.

I’m going to be honest, I didn’t completely buy his redemption arc even at the end of the third book in the Glass series, but by the ninth book they’re still together and he’s on the good guys’ side, so I guess it was real. And I have definitely watched/read much worse evil asshole to boyfriend stories. At least Devlen genuinely feels guilty for the horrible things he did in the past and attempts to make up for them, and in her defense, Opal has to do a lot of soul-searching before she can find it in her to forgive and trust him, and even more before she can develop romantic feelings for him (that aren’t based on deception, anyway). Also, Ulrick becomes a huge jerk because of his newfound magical abilities, tries to kill Opal, and later gets assassinated by Valek. I appreciate what Maria V. Snyder is trying to do here, which is to teach through her storytelling how good people can become evil, and evil people can redeem themselves and be good. Their romance was uncomfortable to read, but it was supposed to be uncomfortable, because that’s how all parties involved felt.

Now, let’s talk about Commander Ambrose. Towards the end of the first book, Yelena discovers that Ambrose is a female to male trans person. This is revealed to be why Ambrose hates magicians so much: he is afraid that one of them will read his mind and then reveal his secret (which is how Yelena discovers it). After I read the first book, I was really pleased that Snyder did such a good job of depicting a trans person, as that’s really only a small part of his character, and those who know (mainly Valek and Yelena) don’t make a big deal out of it.

And then . . . I really wish that the author would have just left the issue of the Commander being trans alone. Yelena discovers it in the first book, she keeps it to herself because it’s nobody else’s business, the end. But by creating this weird intricate background to explain why Ambrose is trans, Snyder just kind of shoots herself in the foot.

Throughout the rest of the series, I kept hoping for some other LGBTQ+ characters to show up to redeem the blunder with Ambrose. I actually believed that Ari and Janco were a gay couple for the longest time, what with their banter and often being referred to as partners. However, if this was the author’s intention, it was never really explicitly stated, and the partner thing just seems to refer to them being partners in combat and nothing else.
  
Resurrection: A Zombie Novel
Resurrection: A Zombie Novel
10
10.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Resurrection: A Zombie Novel by Michael J. Totten is a marvelous book about a post-apocalyptic world in which a virus leaves millions of humans in a crazed state that makes them only wish to eat the flesh of their fellow mankind. With so many twists and turns, you are able to develop ideas on how the characters were before the virus spread, how they have changed, and different things that could easily affect how you would view another human. It was delightful to be able to read about some of the history leading up to the outbreak on each character, while being able to learn what made them tick. The way the characters interact had me laughing from time to time as they are so different and stubborn in their own ways that it makes it hard for them to agree on things. I loved how it brought up a lot of different ideas and thoughts one might have before an outbreak like this happens as well as how it could change the way one might feel or think once they realize they may be the last alive to help set up a new society. Not to mention, how some things we know can go out the window when your life is depending on you being super careful and cautious out the window.

Watching the characters deal with issues with their first major problem, other survivors definitely gave me the impression that in a world with no rules, people no longer try to make friends or even help each other out. I had felt completely anxious and sad that other healthy humans couldn’t be bothered to be kind to our main group of characters. I understand they had their reason, but it did remind me how in real life, without a zombie outbreak, the majority of the human race will only look out for themselves and what they believe belongs to them. It was refreshing to see how even though sometimes you don’t get along with your team, how a common enemy can pull you together, even if the enemy is survivors who could be potential assets to your group. I also found that the idea of us, humans, and thinking we know a ton, to be quite lacking.

Totten had brought a valuable point up in the book, whether he meant to or not. If something should happen, where we needed to live off the earth and a huge portion of our population is dead, or heavily diseased and dangerous to be near, how would be survive? A lot of people take for granted the fact they have heat, running water, electricity, and food, so without out being able to just purchase it and having to resort to growing it and such, our survivors would need to learn a lot of information. I enjoyed the idea of the characters going to look for books on farming, building, and anything else they would need to learn how to do, but it got me thinking about how everything today is slowly becoming that of a digital world. Yes there are still libraries out there with millions of books, but most libraries are in areas that could easily be surrounded by the infected. Even in Resurrection, that could be an issue and yet when Kyle brings up they could just obtain the books to teach them how to do things, the other characters didn’t seem as concerned about the idea, as I was upon reading that. After all, reading how they have to be careful just going to a sporting goods store and all the concerns they have when doing things, makes the idea of going into a library very worrisome.

However, it wasn’t just the knowledge most people don’t have that brought this story to my mind in some serious thought, it was seeing how something as simple as knowing your blood type and how blood transfusion work, seems to leave you in times of panic. We all know that certain blood types just can’t be mixed with others and often this knowledge isn’t needed. Most of us don’t even know our blood types, myself included, because we just don’t always see the need to know such information, or we just simply forget it. So I wasn’t surprised that the characters didn’t know their blood types off the back of their hand, but I found how simple things we have learned since grade school about other people’s blood containing diseases and even allergic reactions if placed in your own body without proper care could just disappear until after doing just that. I can’t say I would have thought of it either, but at the same time I would like to think that it’s something I wouldn’t feel right about. Though, how could any of us be sure we would do something different?

Totten seemed to be able to use the characters to remind us of how important some of the things we take for granted are. I enjoyed seeing how friendships can be broken or made easily, how teamwork is important in the matter of survival, and how people would truly act in a post-apocalyptic world. To see common sense that we have go out the window in some situations and in other situations seem create stealthy humans with common sense and the ability to have sound judgement. Not everyone would have been able to write about such a world, and have characters make mistakes that leave you shaking your head. To be able to see the characters as imperfect humans doing their best to get by in the world, definitely makes this novel a delightful read. I would rate Resurrection: A Zombie Novel 5 stars out of 5 stars. Definitely a must read for the zombie lover. I would say if you love zombie movies and shows, you would find this book right up your alley. With characters you could relate to, and situations that aren’t impossible to imagine, you will fall in love with the writing style and story that Michael Totten gave to us in this short, page turner.
  
Laws of Attraction (The Manx Cat Guardians #6)
Laws of Attraction (The Manx Cat Guardians #6)
JP Sayle | 2019 | LGBTQ+, Romance, Science Fiction/Fantasy
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
i had another hissy fit!
Independent reviewer for Archaeolibrarian, I was gifted my copy of this book.

This is book 6 in the Manx Cat Guardians series, and you really SHOULD read the other books first. There is MUCH referenced to, but not fully explained, from those books, and you will need to know what’s happened before now. And, you know, I TOLD you to!

Nick has had an attraction to his brother’s best friend, Brody, since he was a child. Now, on the Isle of Man, working on Aaden and Greg’s new kitchen, with Brody in close proximity, Nick can no longer hide his feelings. Brody’s reaction to Nick at Christmas has him questioning everything he ever thought about the squirt. When a certain witchy-poo's involvement in both men’s feelings come to light, and that spell is lifted, Brody is confused about some things, but he knows this: Nick is HIS. They just need to get to the bottom of Brody’s true feelings, what Nick thinks happened all that time ago, and just how deep that witch went with her spell.

So, yes, book 6, but I’ve been awaiting this one since we met Nick and Brody in book 4, Searching For A Soul to Love. Nick is Aaden’s younger brother and Brody his best friend. There were some hints to this book in that one, and a development in 12 Disasters of Christmas and this one does not disappoint!

Well, it DOES, just a tad, and I’m being petty, I know but these books tend to bring out my darkest thoughts, and also the most extreme! I wanted Nick and Brody to get together FAR sooner in this book! They do get together, I just had to wait til nearly the end for the main event! Oh don’t get me wrong, its sexy, and steamy and hawt as hell in places, but for the final joining of their souls and bodies? FAR too long I had to wait! And this is why I can’t stretch to 5 stars!

Everyone has a say, EVERYONE! Brody and Nick, mostly, but some of the other guys get a few minutes too. We also get a lot of that witchy-poo, Christina, and how she spelled Brody and Nick all that time ago, and WHY she did it. And now she’s paying the price for that: but she was warned! She is working off her penance, helping to find out who is trying to sabotage Greg at work and she wants her magic back. She does NOT like feeling human! Some amusing moments, though, for Christina and her body without magic.

King Manannan has a say, and we get how he feels about said witch. Which was totally unexpected! I did not see that coming! There are a lot of HINTS about what Christina is to the King, and about something that her father did to her as a child, but these are not fully explained and I wanted to know! Again, the extremes these books drag out of me! I was like, JUST BLOODY TELL ME!! And Ms Sayle, in true fashion, does not tell me, and so again, I spat me dummy out and threw my toys out the pram and everything, A-BLOODY-GAIN!

And we meet Ellie, and Cam, who are the stars of the next book. And even though THEY didn’t meet each other, I have a feeling their book will be quite explosive. So, write quicker, please!

Because I had to wait so bloody long for the main event, and because my questions about the King and Christina are NOT answered (but I think HERE, everyone will be asking questions about those two!) I can only stretch to..

..a hot and steamy 4 stars

**same worded review will appear elsewhere**
  
40x40

Margaret A. Young (1 KP) rated Bears vs Babies in Tabletop Games

Nov 3, 2018 (Updated Nov 3, 2018)  
Bears vs Babies
Bears vs Babies
2017 | Animals, Card Game, Comic Book / Strip, Humor
Fun family or party game. (1 more)
Perfect for teens
A bit expensive for a card game, but it is unique and enjoyable. (0 more)
Beasts vs Babies
Although my sons are known for loving their tech, we find table top games a great way to connect as a family. We really enjoy family game nights,but I have also been surprised by how much time my teen age son spends playing table top games when his friends come to visit. Everyone who comes to visit seems to love our game collection and they usually spend more time with card and board games than computers and gaming consoles.

We bought Bears vs. Babies because my sons loved Exploding Kittens which was created by the same people. While being a completely different game, I think this would appeal to anyone who enjoyed Exploding Kittens.

Bears vs Babies comes packaged in a sturdy box which is covered with fake fur. Although this is attractive, we bought a separate case for travel as the box it comes in is a bit bulky for camping and scouting trips, does not lock closed and the fur would get dirty quite easily. However, if you simply want it to keep it on a shelf it is fine, and the unique box does seem nice for a gift item.

Inside the box is the deck of cards, a rule book, another book of frequently asked questions, which I fact contains more rules, and a cloth playing mat. The frequently asked questions book says that you don't need to read it, but you really do. It shouldn't take more than a couple of minutes to read both, so do yourself a favour and have a quick read before starting the game.

This game has been played by my sons and their friends, ranging in ages from 8 - 13. This game is recommended for ages 10+, but I think it could be played with children as young as six with minor assistance, and my youngest was 9 when we got this.

Although the game is called Bears vs Babies, there is really only one bear unless you count a water bear, which isn't a bear at all. I think Beasts vs Babies would be a more accurate name. Some of the beasts you can make include a Grizzly Bear, a Llama, a Velociraptor, a Manatee and an undead looking rabbit. Or at least you can create creatures which look like a sin against nature with these heads. You collect and play other cards to add a body, legs, arms and accessories to your monsters, trying to get as many points as possible. The monsters are pitted against babies whose also look like abominations, though this is clearly intentional.

Game play is pretty simple. You are allowed to actions per turn. So you can add parts to your monsters, play an action card, draw cards or provoke babies. Babies and monsters are divided into three categories, land, sea and air. When a baby is provoked, all the babies of that category attack all monsters of the same category on the table. The one with the most points wins.

As with any game, we add a few personal twists to it. Instead of just calling provoke to start a battle with babies, you can make each player come up with a unique way to provoke them... energy drink in the baby bottles, hide their teddy bears, and so on. Adding sound effects for the winning monster can add to the fun as well.

While I wouldn't say this is game that can keep children or teens entertained for hours, it is something that is chosen regularly, by both my own children and visitors. A round of the game can take perhaps 20 minutes and this is usually played once in a session before moving on to another game. To be fair, the boys do say they prefer Exploding Kittens, And Exploding Kittens does get played more frequently, but this is still a very welcome addition to our games collection and I am well pleased with our purchase.
  
Girls' Night Out
Girls' Night Out
Liz Fenton | 2018 | Fiction & Poetry
10
8.5 (4 Ratings)
Book Rating
First & foremost thank you very much to Netgalley & Lake Union Publishing for allowing me to read a free arc of this book in exchange for an honest review ❤️??.

I MUST start off by saying that when I browse through Netgalley and choose which books I'd like to review I always go by the synopsis of the book and don't really pay attention to the cover or the author(s). I absolutely love a good thriller, so when I read what this book was about I couldn't hit the "request" button fast enough. When asked what appealed to me...I indicated the subject matter. How could I not relate to going on a trip with two of my best girlfriends? Sign me up! Then, since I am very new to this process, only joining as of May 30th, I was approved for a large amount of novels all at once and this one got lost somewhere in amongst the crowd. I read 15 books BEFORE this one, which would not have been the case had I taken a brief moment to contemplate where I had heard the two authors names Lisa Steinke & Liz Fenton before.

To continue on with my story...I was ready to select my next book to read last night and came across
" Girls' Night Out" somewhere in the middle of my shelf and thought to myself, " Awesome...Download!" It wasn't until I was flipping through the beginning pages ( you know, the ones that are usually passed by and disregarded until you find page 1 or " prologue.") when I saw other books listed by these co-authors. There in plain sight was " The Status of All Things," one of my favorite books of all time! My review of this book clearly indicates " definitely in my top 20 books of all time" and it's categorized in my favorites folder on goodreads! Total fan-girl moment!!!!! Kate was one of my favorite characters, I saw so much of myself in her! So...before I review this new book I must also insist that if you're reading this to please also pick up their other book " The Status of All Things" which I have already recommended to every single one of my friends. It is about a girl in her thirties that is obsessed with social media ( who isn't?) who is able to keep changing her life & the lives of those around her based on her Facebook status updates! It reminds me of Lauren Oliver's "Before I Fall" meets "The Butterfly Effect" movie. End rant, sorry! But read it ?

Now onto my review of " A Girls' Night Out!" Whew! The suspense was almost too much to bear in this one! Just imagine...you go on a much needed vaca to a beautiful island with two of your best girl friends and one of them disappears!!! Yes, you wake up and she's gone..one friend can't remember because she was so intoxicated and the other basically left her to fend for herself and went home with some random bartender. Which one would you rather be? The missing? The drunk? The sexaholic? Not very good friends if you ask me.

I started reading around 9 pm and read for so long that I fell asleep with my kindle on my face, woke up at 4 am and read some more, and couldn't put it down all day today! I ate breakfast, lunch and dinner all the while flip, flip, flipping through the pages and devouring every word! It was like this book was my oxygen and I needed it to survive.

I had myself talked into various scenarios because I so desperately wanted to figure out what was going on! At one point I thought that Marco was a setup from the beginning, a plant to take Ashley away and cause problems for her marriage. Payback time? Then I thought that Lauren had drugged Natalie and done something to Ashley herself. I also thought that Ben, Jason & Natalie were in on something together against Ashley because they all wanted the money from the business. I also thought Marco wasn't even real and maybe someone that both girls made up to get away with murder! Man does my head hurt! This book gave me whiplash ?? I won't give away any spoilers or endings but what I will say is that when they showed up at the morgue to identify the body my heart was pounding like I was right there with them. Please don't let it be her.

How can these two best friends perfect two completely different genres? I don't know, but they did! A great team! Can't wait to read ALL of their other books! Another one to add to my favorites shelf.
  
The Book of Kings
The Book of Kings
Robert Gilliam | 1995 | Science Fiction/Fantasy
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Shelf Life – The Book of Kings Has a Few Gems and a Few Warts
Contains spoilers, click to show
Unlike other short story anthologies I could mention, this one wasn’t mostly horrible. Instead, the stories inside run the gamut from stupid to brilliant and from annoying to nothing special to fun and memorable. A little something for everyone, then.

So since I can’t review it with one blanket sentiment, let’s instead take a quick look at a handful of the 20 all-original stories inside. The following are the tales that most stood out to me during my reading, for better or worse.

“The Kiss” by Alan Dean Foster – A woman walking through a snowy city finds a frog who says he’s a prince, so she kisses him. He turns into a guy and stabs her to death.

Oh boy, we’re not off to a great start here. This story could have been told in a page or so and been an interesting twist on the old tale, but instead the author drew it out over three pages by choosing the absolute most pretentious choice of words for every damn sentence. The guy doesn’t stab the woman, his “knife describes a Gothic arc.” She doesn’t shout or whisper or ask what’s going on, she “expels a querrelous trauma.” It’s not snowing on her face, “trifles of ice as beautiful as they were capricious tickled her exposed cheeks, only to be turned into simulacra of tears as they were instantly metamorphosed by the bundled furnace of her body.”

Yes, really.

The sheer purpleness of this prose might be excused for a deliberately lofty and overwrought tale, but it absolutely does not fit a story about a girl getting shanked by a frog on the street. If the contrast between what’s happening and how it’s presented is supposed to seem absolutely ridiculous, then it’s a success. This reads more like a writing exercise for seeing how unbearably melodramatic you can tell a simple story that the author went ahead and published anyway. I only read it last night as of the time of this particular bit of review, but I still have a headache.

“Divine Right” by Nancy Holder – A king grieving for his recently passed daughter and only heir tries to figure out how to keep his legacy from dying out and eventually decides on a way to choose a successor, sealing his decision by making a pact with God.

I really liked this one, partly for the great characterization of the king via his priorities. He’s not a bastion of righteousness or a tyrannical despot. He might be a pretty decent ruler, or he might not, depending on your priorities and the angle from which you view him. Mostly he’s written to be believable for his position and time period, pride and failings and all.

But what really sealed this story for me was the ironic bent of the plot that I can’t really discuss in any more depth without spoiling it except to say that it definitely fit with the tone and left an appropriate message. So let’s just give it a thumbs up and leave it at that.

“In the Name of the King” by Judith Tarr – If you know the story of Hatshepsut, an Egyptian queen who ruled as Pharaoh, then this is an extra interesting story. It follows both Hatshepsut and her lover in the afterlife and the legacy they’re leaving behind after their deaths, in which they take a surprisingly active interest for dead people.

If you know your history, though, you know where this is going, and it’s very touching as it gets there. It’s also character-centric in a way that makes its dead cast members seem very much alive. This one’s a good contender for my favorite story in the whole anthology.

“Please to See the King” by Debra Doyle and James D. Macdonald – A small glimpse of about one evening each into the lives of two seemingly unrelated, seemingly unimportant men against the backdrop of the battles being fought over a vague and distant rebellion against a vague and distant crown.

To say more would be to spoil the story, which is short, sweet, and interesting. It gives you just enough details, and no more, that you can piece together a much deeper story with room left for speculation about who certain characters really were and what exactly just happened. I’ve spent more time thinking about how the ending may be interpreted than it took me to read it, which is a good sign of nuance done right.

“The Name of a King” by Diana L. Paxson – This’n c’n rightf’ly b’ put in w’ th’ other st’ries I woul’n’t oth’rwise b’ther t’ mention ‘cept fer th’ o’erwrought dialectic style o’ nearly all o’ th’ dialogue, whut c’n git on yer nerves right quick-like whene’er any’ne op’ns their mouths. An’ while I’m ‘ere, th’ settin’ w’s rife wi’ plen’y o’ hints at deeper d’tails whut was ne’er sufficien’ly delved into or whut impact’d th’ actu’l plot much. Felt like part o’ a fant’sy series whut I was ‘spected t’ b’ f’miliar wit’ but wasn’t, an’ whut di’n’t give me ’nuff t’ git f’miliar wit’ just fr’m this st’ry.

Oth’rwise, t’w’sn’t t’ b’d, I s’pose. Bit borin’.

“Coda: Working Stiff” by Mike Resnick and Nicholas A. DiChario – This one was just fun. Again trying not to give away any twists or revelations, this one follows a journalist interviewing a bus driver who used to be a big, famous king back in his heyday but is now content (or so he says) with his obscure life of working a simple job in the day and drinking in his spartan home at night.

Who this ex-king really is probably isn’t who you think it’s gonna be at first, but the story does still technically, and cheekily, fit in with the premise of the book overall. It reminds me very much of something Neil Gaiman might have written, or maybe Terry Pratchett if he’d decided to tackle the kingly premise from a more modern and realistic approach.

There are still 14 stories left in here, many of which are also good reads, or at least decent. In fact, looking back through it again, the only real dud that stands out to me is “The Kiss.” The weakest of what’s left are either adaptations of stories that didn’t really do it for me (“The Tale of Lady Ashburn” by John Gregory Betancourt) or weird original works that weren’t really memorable in what they set out to do (“A Parker House Roll” by Dean Wesley Smith).

Overall, The Book of Kings is a fun and interesting romp through a number of royal worlds, themes, and tones. As such, anyone who gives it a look will probably have the same general sentiment I did at the end, with a few things to like and a few to point to as examples of what doesn’t work for them. Me, I got a bit of the inspiration I was looking for and a few memorable tales out of it, so I’ll forgive the warts.
  
Fallen Angel
Fallen Angel
5
5.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Genre: Contemporary Adult

Average Goodreads Rating: 4.27

My Rating: 2.5

“What do you see when you look into my eyes?” I asked breathlessly and not entirely sure where the question had come from.

“All there is to know,” was his reply. “What do you see when you look into my eyes, Brooke?” he whispered, there was a slight anger to his voice.

I trembled. “An abyss and danger,” was all I could say.


I found Fallen Angel when I was looking for angel/mortal romance novels. Even though Fallen Angel was listed as a mafia romance and not not the supernatural romance I was looking for, I picked it up anyway. And at first it was great.

It immediately started out with a strong love story. Brooke is in the midst of an existential crisis after breaking up with her long-time boyfriend. When she visits her best friend Sam in New York, she ends up meeting billionaire Robert Stone, a handsome CEO who doesn’t know how to take no for an answer. To the point of being a jerk about it. But at least he’s self aware about that.

“I’m worried that I might hurt you. I have a knack of doing that when people get too close to me, a defense mechanism, I guess.”

No one pretends Robert is a great boyfriend, which I love. There are too many alpha billionaires out there that are disturbingly abusive while everyone pretends it’s a normal relationship. Not here. Robert’s actually one of the first to admit that he’s not a good boyfriend and he’s never had a real relationship. Which is great. I love flawed heroes. And when Robert does get better at communicating his feelings, it’s worth it.

“I love you, Brooke. You’ll never know just how much because there are no words.”

 

And Brooke is strong enough to handle him. She stands up to Robert when he disses Sam for being gay (which, by the way, I hated a lot. You can be a flawed badass without being a homophobe. Ugh. Major turn-off for me) and when he makes a big deal about her wearing a revealing dress.

“I wore it for you and not for anyone else. If people can see my body, so what? You’re the only one touching it,” I told him.

Brooke’s even a trained kick boxer. She’s incredibly strong and perfect to help Robert get over his past.

Then the story falls flat.

tired-and-bored-boy-sleep-014

After their second fight and make up, the story gets monotonous real fast. A lot of sex scenes– which, to be fair, were actually hot and well-written– and a lot of the mundane stuff. Brooke hanging out with Sam and Scott, Brooke working, Brooke attending one event or another with Robert. The story just dragged. And with the actual story dragging, the amount of comma splices and run-on sentences became more noticeable to me and book was practically unreadable. I had to make myself finish because I had already invested so much time into it.

It’s not like there wasn’t potential for more plot. There’s a jealous ex girlfriend out to steal Robert back and Brooke’s ex boyfriend can’t accept their break up. Brooke takes a troubled teen under her wing and isn’t this supposed to be a mafia romance?

And yet the majority of the middle of the book is sex, clothes, work days, and how great Brooke is for Robert. On top of that, Brooke loses a lot of the strength and independence I saw earlier in the book. In fact, she turned into a love sick teen.

Our souls, so entwined, were part of each other, true soul mates. Not even death would separate us.

marrypoppinsareyouill

To make matters worse, Robert’s criminal background isn’t revealed until three quarters of the way through the story! And since he got out of illegal activities years before he met Brooke, it’s really anticlimactic. Brooke makes a huge deal out of it and almost leaves him because of his past, which makes me dislike her even more. The criminal element actually seems more like an after thought to this so-called mafia romance. I’m really surprised it has such a high rating on Goodreads because I found it pretty disappointing. My rating is 2.5 stars because of the strong beginning, but I definitely won’t be reading any more of the Fallen Angel series.