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Lake Placid (1999)
Lake Placid (1999)
1999 | Action, Comedy, Horror
Brendan Gleeson excels as a sarcastic and jaded local policeman, And Betty White is glorious as the batty old foulmouth. Stan Winston's physical special effects are great as ever. (0 more)
The script is just terrible, and most of the film is a painful and slow experience, with little action. CGI scenes can tend from ok to just terrible. (0 more)
The Toothless Croc Adventure that bit off more than it could chew
If you are big horror fan, like I am, then you will no doubt have seen and loved Jaws at some point.

The spectacular fear of something huge and unseen in the water, a perfectly evolved marine predator capable of tremendous power and speed, with a jaw size capable of cutting you in half.

Jaws hit on a very primal fear, that there is an unreasoning, prehistoric simplicity to the shark, that reminds us that until the last few thousand years, we were just another form of food for many creatures on this planet, and that we could be again, in the right circumstances.

It is this fear that also informs our love of Zombie movies, our disgust at cannibals and keeps us watching endless episodes of dirty, tired-looking people arguing in 'The Walking Dead'.

Where Jaws created a whole genre of horror in 'Killer Shark' movies, their reptilian counterparts have had to make do with a somewhat less successful series of outings, with Alligator, Croc etc

They just haven't quite hit our imagination in the same way, whether that be because of their comical waddle on land, or having watched an excited Australian man jumping all over them on TV (RIP Steve Irwin)...

Regardless, Lake Placid is the one that most remember from recent history, and having listened to a 'Horrow Show' Podcast on the film recently, I mentioned to my better half I wouldn't mind seeing it again, to see if it is as bad as it sounded.

Well last night, said better half suggested we watch it and boy oh boy...

So first off, Brendan Gleeson was by far the best thing about this movie, his one liners and grumpy demeanor were, for long periods, the best thing about this movie, shortly followed by the hilarious Betty White.

Stan Winstone, legendary physical creature effects maestro turns in some great stuff, and when they are dealing withe the physical creature, it is very effective but all too often they resort to CGI, which is passable but still tends to take you out of the moment..

Oliver Platt's casting as a crocodile expert playboy is amusing at first, then confusing and eventually just...well not laughable exactly as it isnt very funny, but strange certainly.

The movie languishes for long periods, focusing on the incredibly inert chemistry between leading lady Fonda, and wooden cardboard cut out Pullman, giving you poorly written rom com scripts where we signed up to see a giant Croc eat people.

Long story short, this movie is light on tension and action, heavy on clumsy exposition and strange casting choices, and it a poor relation to Jaws, which is more worthy of your time.
  
My Dark Vanessa
My Dark Vanessa
Kate Elizabeth Russell | 2020 | Contemporary, Fiction & Poetry
10
9.6 (5 Ratings)
Book Rating
At fifteen, the very bright Vanessa Wye earns a scholarship position to boarding school. It's the year 2000. There she meets Jacob Strane, her English teacher, who is forty-two-years-old. Soon the two are involved in a powerful relationship--and one that quickly turns sexual. Seventeen years later, Vanessa is working as a concierge at a hotel, just another in a series of dead-end jobs. She hasn't had any real serious relationships. And now, Jacob Strane, has been accused of sexual abuse by a former student, Taylor Birch. Taylor tracks down Vanessa, wanting her to share her story, too. But Vanessa doesn't feel she was abused by Strane. In fact, her entire life is framed by her love story with Strane. As Taylor Birch's story gains traction in the press, Vanessa must confront her past and what it means to her.


"'I'm going to ruin you.' He says it with obvious torment, a glimpse into how much he's thought about it, wrestled with it."


This book...wow. I was absolutely captivated by Vanessa's story. She tells her tale in two parts: her adolescence, as she meets Jacob Strane at school and they begin their relationship; and then the present, as Taylor Birch's story hits the press and Vanessa must deal with the fact that her love for Jacob Strane is being portrayed as abuse and assault.


"It's strange to know that whenever I remember myself at fifteen, I'll think of this."


For a book with such dark subject matter, it's really beautiful. Russell is a wonderful writer, and this story unfolds almost lyrically. It's so well-done and completely mesmerizing. The sections featuring young Vanessa capture that early adolescent yearning and longing so perfectly--that deep desire to feel needed and wanted. To Vanessa, this is a love story, a romantic tale of a man needing and loving her. She blocks out and overlooks the parts of the story that don't fit. Understanding that some victims don't see abuse as abuse is key to the story, and Russell portrays the dynamic between Strane and Vanessa so well.


"'It's just my luck,' he said, 'that when I finally find my soul mate, she's fifteen years old.'"


As a result, we get a very thoughtful look at abuse, rape, and assault. And, yes, the sections of older Vanessa's story touch across the #metoo movement, as Taylor Birch and others want so desperately for Vanessa to join their side, to share her story. For them or for Vanessa, it's hard to say. This book is so dark, yet so insightful. Vanessa's inner struggle--basically she's having to re-look at the entire foundation upon which her life is built--is one of the most profoundly written and moving journeys I've seen in literature in quite some time. It's not easy to read about, certainly, and it's not always easy to understand her actions, of course. The story can make you uncomfortable; it can feel problematic. But it's an important read, and it's so beautifully and poetically written. I highly recommend it (taking into account the obvious trigger warnings, of course). 4.5+ stars.
  
Little Comfort
Little Comfort
Edwin Hill | 2019
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Hester Thursby is a Harvard research librarian with a knack for finding things. She's good at research, so when Lila Blaine comes to her, asking for help finding her long-lost brother, Sam, Hester figures it will be another easy job in what has become a side-business for her. Hester has some extra time, as she's on leave from her job as she and her partner, Morgan, try to navigate life with his niece, Kate, whom they are caring for since her own mom has disappeared. But finding Sam--who may have left with his friend Gabe, a foster kid, isn't as easy as it seems. Sam has no wish to be found. He's now a con man who cozies up to the rich and his latest mark, Wendy Richards, a Boston socialite, has the ability to give him all he's ever dreamed of: wealth, status, security, and more. When Hester's investigation threatens this, there's no limit to what Sam and Gabe may do.

This was an intriguing mystery that definitely held my interest. Somehow it was darker and grittier than I expected (sorry, I probably wasn't giving librarians enough credit here), but that certainly didn't diminish my interest at all. The opposite really. Hester is a fascinating character, to say the least. A lot of toughness, smarts, and dedication wrapped into a tiny package (she's 4'9"). She's dealing with a lot, taking on care of three-year-old Kate and a leave of absence, but that doesn't stop her from tracking down subjects and tangling with whomever she meets. She, Kate, and their basset hound, Waffles, are on the case.

The book is told from multiple POV, so we hear from a whole host of characters, including Gabe and Sam. Hill is a wonderful storyteller, and really puts you in the shoes of his characters. And boy, are some of these folks creepy. Terrible things happen in this story, and some of these people are downright despicable. Yet, he still captures the intense longing of Gabe, a foster child, and shows how Hester, who also had a tough childhood, can identify with him. Each character is an individual with their own voice. It's incredibly easy to get caught up in the tale of Gabe, Sam, and Lila and their past at Little Comfort, a lake house, plus Hester, Morgan, and Kate (oh sweet little Kate). I read the second half of the book in one determined setting, fascinated to find out what was going to happen. It's not edge-of-your-seat suspense, per se, but it's wonderful characterization and dark, mesmerizing plotting. So many secrets, so many lies to unravel.

Overall, while this one was more complicated and edgier than I was planning going into it, that was fine with me. Hester is a great character, and I'm really excited that this is a series. Hill is an excellent writer, who knows how to hold my interest with a well-paced thriller. I'm quite looking forward to seeing what Hester is up to next.
  
Velvet Buzzsaw (2019)
Velvet Buzzsaw (2019)
2019 | Drama, Horror, Mystery
Ever since Netflix have proven themselves as a fantastic streaming platform, everyone gets hyped about their ‘Originals’. Velvet Buzzsaw was no exception, and when the first trailer dropped I was so excited to watch it. Everything about it seemed great; it was written and directed by Dan Gilroy (the guy who gave us the fantastic Nightcrawler), and the cast was incredible. Who could say no to Jake Gyllenhaal, Rene Russo AND Toni Collette? Not me. Unfortunately, this wonderful mix didn’t live up to my expectations at all and left me feeling very disappointed.

The main issue I had with Velvet Buzzsaw is that the pacing is horrendously slow. The first 45 minutes felt like nothing but exposition, when it was a relatively simple concept for the audience to grasp. The film follows a bunch of art critics, artists and patrons of the arts as they uncover a series of paintings from an unknown artist. However, they’re not your normal paintings because a supernatural force lurks within them waiting to enact revenge. That’s it, that’s the synopsis. So why waste so much screen time dragging things out? The trailer made this look like a fast paced, intense thriller, but the reality is nothing like that.

It’s a shame the pacing and screenplay is so weak, because Velvet Buzzsaw does have a few redeeming features. The quality of acting is very good, and visually it’s beautiful to look at, particularly the locations and the paintings that appear throughout. I especially enjoyed the characters Rhodora Haze (Rene Russo) and Gretchen (Toni Collette), as they embody the typically powerful, ruthless and bitchy personas one would expect from this industry. They satirise art lovers perfectly, which is partially why I haven’t rated this film lower. In all honesty, these actors deserved better than the script they were dealt, and it’s a shame such talent was wasted here. I’m having trouble understanding how you can take such an interesting concept and brilliant actors, and make it so boring.

Even the inevitable death scenes are pretty dull, and play like a straight to TV horror film that doesn’t quite hit the mark. Velvet Buzzsaw fails to execute any sort of suspense, or even terror, so when people eventually die you’re just sat there like “Huh, is that it?”. After such a slow first act, you expect some kind of payoff, but it never arrives. Again, the trailer had some pretty scary moments that made me expect a few jump scares or intense moments. I’m confused about why this was even marketed as a horror-thriller, when it lacks so many of the aspects that make both those genres great. I didn’t feel scared at all, and even when the characters we were supposed to hate met their demise, there was no morbid satisfaction in it. To be completely honest, I was apathetic towards the whole thing. I just wanted it to end.

If you are a fan of slow-burning films that take a while to get going, then you might enjoy Velvet Buzzsaw more than I did. I don’t necessarily have a problem with these types of films, but you still need to keep the audience gripped somehow. You need to give people a reason to keep watching.

Gilroy’s attempt to show the horrors of the art world falls flat, and certainly doesn’t live up to the expectations based on the success of Nightcrawler. Part of me even wondered how this was the same man, it felt so vastly different to his other work. Netflix Originals rarely let me down, but this time, they really did.

https://jumpcutonline.co.uk/review-velvet-buzzsaw-2019/
  
Mister Roberts (1955)
Mister Roberts (1955)
1955 | Classics, Comedy, Drama
9
9.0 (1 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Well Acted
A staple of Old Hollywood under the Studio System was to adapt to the film Broadway shows that were a big hit. One such hit was the 1948 WWII play MISTER ROBERTS starring Henry Fonda (who would win a Tony Award for his performance).

In 1955, Paramount Studios mounted a film production of MISTER ROBERTS starring Fonda, James Cagney (in his last film role for Paramount - who he had been under contract to for 25 years), William Powell (in his last film role) and a young "up-and-comer" by the name of Jack Lemon.

Set in the waning days of World War II aboard a "cargo vessel", MISTER ROBERTS tells the tale of...well...Mister Roberts, the cargo officer who is keeping the ship afloat - serving as a buffer between the crew and the tyrannical Captain. Roberts longs for one thing - to join the war on a battleship, but the Captain knows his success is dependent on Roberts.

Paramount considered Fonda too old for the role, so they sought out younger stars like Marlon Brando and William Holden, but Director John Ford insisted on Fonda - and a wise choice it was. Fonda's easy-going natural personality - tinged with anger and regret - is perfectly suited for this role. He is just as at home joking around with the sailors as he is going mano-a-mano with the Captain. Also perfectly cast is the great James Cagney as the Captain who is only concerned about 1 thing - how he is perceived by the higher ups in the Navy. The conflict between Cagney and Fonda is dynamite and it is worth the price of admission just to watch these 2 Hollywood heavyweights go at it.

Jack Lemon won his first Oscar (as Best Supporting Actor) for portraying Mr. Roberts bunkmate, Ensign Pulver. It is a perfect match of character and actor and you can see where the greatness that is Jack Lemon (an under-rated actor) stems from. The surprise to me at this viewing was the strong work of William Powell (THE THIN MAN movie series) as Doc, the best friend of Mr. Roberts aboard the ship. He has an ease and rapport with Fonda and when Fonda, Powell and Lemon share the screen together the film sparkles.

And that's the best part - and the worst part - of this great film. It looks like a filmed stage play. Veteran Director John Ford looks like he was "mailing it in" on this one, in that he would just put his camera in one stationary position and let his actors play the scenes like they were in a play. This is either laziness - or genius - at the hands of Ford (I would argue probably a little of each). He was wise enough to know he had some incredible talent (Fonda, Cagney, Powell and Lemon) - and a strong script by Frank S. Nugent and Joshua Logan (based on the stage play by Logan and Thomas Hagen...based on Hagen's book), so he stayed out of the way as much as possible.

Consequently, the first part of this film is a bit talky and stagey looking and drags just a bit, but once the film catches it's steam - and these 4 stars light up the screen - this film is well worth watching.

Letter Grade: A

9 stars (out of 10) and you can take that to the Bank(ofMarquis)

P.S.: I caught Mister Roberts on the great cable channel TURNER CLASSIC MOVIES - but (as far as I can tell) it's not scheduled to be re-run there anytime soon (and is not streamable on the Watch TCM app), so you'll need to rent it at all the "normal" places (YouTube, GoogePLay, iTunes and Vudu)
  
TA
The Apothecary's Daughter
10
6.7 (3 Ratings)
Book Rating
Although it has been a couple years since I read this one, I am still very fond of it and have determined that I need to reread it SOON! Hopefully I can find the time before too long.

(Original review published on Bookworm Mama 11/2014.)
The Apothecary’s Daughter is a wonderful story beginning in 1810, England. Within the pages you will find heartbreak and romance, hope and despair, sorrow and joy. But above all...Faith.

Lillian (Lilly) Haswell is the daughter of the village apothecary in Wiltshire, England. She longs for adventure and a life outside of her father’s shop. Her mother left when she was younger and Lilly dreams of the adventures she might be having and longs to follow after her. Yet she is devoted to her father and her brother, Charlie. When Lilly is whisked away to London by her Aunt and Uncle Elliot, she believes all of her dreams are about to come true. Balls, admirers, the chance to marry a wealthy man and settle in London, but also the chance to look for her mother. Following a sad series of events, she has to return home to help her father run his shop, or risk having it closed. One of her admirers follows her home, but finds that he is not the only one interested in Miss Haswell.

While women were allowed to assist and work in apothecary shops, they were forbidden from diagnosing and prescribing treatments. It is not long before she has to cross the line of the law. Will grace and mercy be shown? Or will this be the end of Haswell’s once and for all? Along her journey Lilly loses herself, but in the end finds who she is and what she truly longs for in life. Throughout her trials and struggles she learns how to depend on the Lord for strength and wisdom.

Julie Klassen's novels are long and full of detail and she draws me in until I am completely obsessed with the story! I really enjoyed learning about the different herbs and their uses, apothecary. I found it all quite fascinating. I adore historical fiction, especially set in England. I was able to truly taste life in the early 1800s through this book. In a lot of ways I could relate to Lilly as well. I have left “home” twice in my life, living adventurously. But my heart was never at peace until I returned.

I borrowed The Apothecary's Daughter from my local library. I was not required to write a review. All opinions expressed are mine alone.
  
Bloodborne
Bloodborne
Role-Playing
Strategic, challenging, and rewarding combat (6 more)
Excellent orchestrated soundtrack
Great aesthetic and visual design
Cool boss designs
Old Hunters expansion adds extra challenge
30-40 hour campaign with loads of content
Lovecraftian horror at its finest
Optional chalice dungeons can be a bit repetitive (0 more)
Bloodborne is an action RPG developed by From Software and directed by Hidetaka Miyazaki, creator of the Dark Souls series. Bloodborne takes elements from the Dark Souls games and mixes in elements of Gothic and Lovecraftian horror to make one truly unique experience exclusively for the Playstation 4.
 You play as a Hunter and you have come to the city of Yharnam on the night of the Hunt where the lines between man and beast are blurred. Initially, your goal is quite simple: just go out and kill some beasts of all manner. Everything from werewolves to madmen to even other NPC Hunters. But as you progress through the game, you begin to unravel a conspiracy involving ancient gods from the cosmos coming down to incite this madness upon the townsfolk. Souls games aren't really known for their stories. Most of the game's backstory can often be found in item descriptions. However, Bloodborne differentiates itself by having one of the most fleshed out and intriguing plots of the entire Soulsborne series.
The presentation here is breathtaking. It evokes the style of olden Gothic horror tales from days long past. Towering spires line the horizon clearly inspired by Victorian and Gothic style architecture of Romania and this is reflected in the games level design. Blood spills out in a vibrant crimson color. Most of the game is completely silent save for the excellent sound design. The soundtrack only kicks in during boss fights and other key moments in the game making it even more special.
If you are familiar with any of the Dark Souls games, then you pretty much know what to expect from Bloodborne's combat. Bloodborne emphasizes speed and aggression with its combat system, but it is still quite strategic and very challenging. Don't go in thinking you can just rush through this in a weekend. This game takes patience and effort from the player to be rewarded. The weapon variety is significantly smaller than that of the Dark Souls games, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Each weapon feels unique, and each one will cater to a specific play style. And since you can transform almost all the weapons in the game, they almost feel like two weapons in one. For example, a shortsword can be transformed into a greatsword and so on. Instead of giving you a shield, Bloodborne instead gives you a wide variety of firearms, from pistols and shotguns, to a flamesprayer and a cannon. You can use these guns on enemies to riposte and perform a visceral attack for massive damage, even on some of the bosses. Armor sets are all really cool, reflecting the games Gothic design. The good thing is that you don't need to worry about upgrading armor sets like in previous Souls games. And the boss designs here are great, some of the hardest and most challenging fights in any game. You have to learn and figure out the timings of their attacks in order to know when best to strike. And if you ever feel like you're getting stuck, you can always bring in a friend with the game's co-op system. The side characters are also great, some of them giving you optional quests that you can carry out if you choose to do so.
There are optional chalice dungeons that you can complete should you choose to do so. The good thing is that they aren't required to finish the game. The bad thing is that these aren't designed as well as the main game. These dungeons are randomly generated and it certainly feels that way as rooms are often copy pasted together to the point where you feel like you're going in circles. Enemy designs are also lazy as hell here, some of them being reused as bosses. It feels like these chalice dungeons were thrown in at the last minute to offer some kind of replay value when they clearly weren't needed in the first place. I'm baffled by their inclusion as some trophies are linked to the completion of these optional missions. But since these are completely optional, they don't take away from the overall score.
There are also a few more minor gripes that I have with Bloodborne. The camera can often get in the way of the surrounding architecture at times. The framerate dips during some instances, even after several patches. Fortunately, these things don't happen all that often. And why can't I warp between lanterns? This doesn't make much sense as if you want to get to a new area, you have to warp to the hub zone and then warp to the area you want to go to. I feel like this would save a lot of load times if you are going back and forth for farming runs. Oh well.
Bloodborne is never impossibly hard. It does have a high learning curve for new players, but if you keep at it and if you are patient enough, you will discover just how rewarding this experience can be. This was my first foray into the Souls series and I am so looking forward to going back in to Bloodborne to try out new builds, new play styles, new weapons, and even greater challenge in New Game Plus mode. Bloodborne is now one of my all time favorite games ever made.
  
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Jordan Binkerd (567 KP) rated American Vampire, Vol. 6 in Books

Jul 21, 2019 (Updated Jul 21, 2019)  
Good variety of stories and art (0 more)
Not all the art works (for me) (1 more)
Adult content.... but if you made it this far in the series, that's not a surprise
Filler Anthology, but still fun...
Note: this review is transposted from my personal review blog, and so was originally written several years ago.

So, it has come to this. The sixth and latest collection of American Vampire comics. Now it’s not just my library’s slow acquisition policies holding me back, but the fact that there haven’t been any more published yet! Apparently the creators put the book on hiatus for a while, but they’ve at least started publishing again. I just have to wait for it to hit the collections….This particular collection is a couple of one-shots they put out in the meantime to keep our appetites whetted–one from the main American Vampire team, one with them letting a whole bunch of other comics creators play in their sandbox. Obviously, this review could spoil events from the previous collections.

First off, we have THE LONG ROAD TO HELL. Snyder and Albuquerque set out the story for this one together, with Albuquerque taking over to script and draw the story. Billy Bob and Jo are the Bonnie and Clyde of petty thieves, picking pockets by night to add to their stash. They’re hoping to have enough soon to cover the cost of renting a chapel, but one fateful encounter with a vampire coven recruitment team and everything changes…not for the better, I’m afraid. Jasper Miller is a young orphan, favorite target of a group of bullies. It seems that young Jasper is a very insightful young man, and some of what he knows makes these bullies very nervous, and he decides that the open road would be safer for him than the old orphanage. Vampire hunter Travis Kidd we’ve already met back in Vol. IV, and it’s good to see that he survived the ambush he willingly dove into at the end of that book. Seems to have picked up a katana somewhere in the interim too, which is always cool. Fate has these four on a collision course, and blood will be spilled by the time they reach the end of the road….

Moving on to the American Vampire Anthology, we open with the frame story by Snyder and Albuquerque. THE MAN COMES AROUND is set in 1967 as Skinner Sweet hides out in the middle of nowhere, hoping to avoid the major events he can sense just over the horizon. Seems there’s always someone trying to kill him, though…. Jason Aaron and Declan Shalvey then enlighten us as to what really happened on Roanoke Island in THE LOST COLONY. Here’s a hint, vampires were involved. We then move on to BLEEDING KANSAS, where Albuquerque puts down his pencil and takes a shot at writing the story, leaving the art to Ivo Milazzo. Set against that tumultuous time and place, Albuquerque and Milazzo set down for us a tale of what I can only assume are Henry Jones’ grandparents. Next up, Jeff Lemire and Ray Fawkes serve up a tale of terror in the frozen north with CANADIAN VAMPIRE as ex-Mountie-turned-bounty-hunter Jack Warhammer is hired to find out what happened to a German fur trading expedition missing in the wild. Becky Cloonan handles both the writing and art for GREED, starring Skinner Sweet and featuring his first encounter with those crazy folks who hail from a place called “Hollywood….” Francesco Francavilla then pulls the same trick for THE PRODUCERS, detailing the birth of a star as he makes a shady deal in exchange for fame and fortune. Gail Simone and Tula Lotay treat us to Hattie Hargrove’s origin story in ESSENCE OF LIFE, showing us just what happened to her that made her willing to screw over her best friend in the world. Gabriel Ba and Fabio Moon share both the writing and artist credits for LAST NIGHT, as a lounge singer describes to a reporter the events leading up to the previous evening’s massacre at the club. Finally, Greg Rucka and JP Leon tell the tale of a dying drunk and the lowlifes who try and shanghai him in PORTLAND, 1940.

On the whole, I really enjoyed this as per the usual for this series. The writing was stellar, and the anthology format really served well for the world being depicted. As with any comics anthology, there’s a wide variety of artistic styles represented, and some of those styles I’m not really a fan of, but that’s largely a matter of taste. I could sit here and tell you that I really wasn’t a fan of Ivo Milazzo’s art on BLEEDING KANSAS (which is true), but the next guy might have loved it. I could laud Tula Lotay’s work on ESSENCE OF LIFE (also true), but the next guy may not have been a fan. That’s kind of how it works–peoples’ tastes are pretty subjective. I did enjoy getting into Hattie’s head a bit more than we were able to back when she was introduced, and Skinner Sweet’s adventures are always fun–I’ve mentioned before my weakness for antiheroes. As a historian, Roanoke’s lost colony is always a fascinating topic, and a number of the plot twists contained here were very satisfying if not always surprising. I really can’t wait for the next volume to come out so I can see the payoff to some of the plot threads being set up both here and in the teaser from the end of volume V….

CONTENT: R-rated language. Brutal, bloody vampire violence–these aren’t sparkly, angst-ridden pretty boys, these are monsters through and through. Some explicit and implicit sexual content, including what more or less constitutes a rape. No real occult content, as there isn’t a spiritual element to this version of vampirism.

Original review link: https://jordanbinkerd.wordpress.com/2014/08/15/review-american-vampire-volume-vi-by-scott-snyder-rafael-albuquerque/