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Purple Phoenix Games (2266 KP) rated Game of HAM: Adult Set in Tabletop Games
Jul 1, 2020
We recently invested in a really great pork loin and were able to get like three excellent meals out of it (if you want recipes, that’s a different blog). I know pork loin and ham aren’t the same, but I do enjoy them immensely. That’s why when I heard about a Game of HAM I was all set and ready to begin! But what I played wasn’t a game about ham at all, but rather a game of “Hating All Mankind.” What???
Game of HAM is a card and board game similar to Apples to Apples and the dreaded Cards Against Humanity. However, HAM differs from these with the addition of the board and actual game play. Yes, each round still needs a judge player and the others to play cards based on a prompt, but after that the game becomes, well, a game. In fact, this game has a board with spaces to travel and a goal space to race to in order to determine the winner.
DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and the final components will probably be different from these shown. Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game, as there are just too many. You are invited to back the game through the upcoming Kickstarter campaign, order from your FLGS, or purchase through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T
To setup, lay out the modular board pieces in any fashion you would like. We played on a boring 1×4 orientation because we lack imagination. At least at first. Next choose a color token to represent your progress along the board. Separate the colored cards into stacks and place under the corresponding giant ham tokens. Each player will be dealt 10 pink response cards and whomever is chosen to be the first judge player will draw a gray card to begin.
Game of HAM comes shipped with about a million cards and an equal number of ways to play. For this preview we played typical core games without any special rules (and we even left a “mandatory rule” out – the rulebook said we could). Seriously, the first half of the rulebook is explaining the game, and the second half is allllllllll optional gameplay styles, optional rules, variants, and so forth.
So on a turn, the judge draws a gray (grey?) card, reads it, places it on the table, and the other players will play pink (penk?) cards as responses for the judge to choose a winner. The winning player will then reference the numbers on the bottom of the gray card to determine how many spaces on the board they will travel. As the aim of the game is to get to the goal space, typically the larger number will be chosen. However, in order to win the game a player must land on the goal space exactly, so this is a reason a player may choose the lesser number.
At times players will land on colored spaces on the board. This signifies that they will draw a card of corresponding color to be used on future turns. These cards can be very powerful and affect other players as well. It is these cards along with the actual game board that separates Game of HAM from others in this vein: there is actual game play and decisions to be made aside from choosing cards that create the most lewd scenarios.
Don’t get me wrong – there ARE lots and lots of opportunities to create these scenarios and pick gross things (especially in this Adult Set), but this is not the only goal of the game. In any case, play continues in this fashion – for the vanilla game mode – until a player has reached the goal space on the board exactly. At this point, the group decides which game mode or optional rules they would like to play with next, because this game can be somewhat addicting.
Components. This is a ham-themed game and the components reflect that wonderfully. Like I mentioned earlier, there are at least a zillion cards that come in this box, and they are all great quality. I have only opened one of the several packs of pink cards that come with the game, and I am not at all joking about that. The giant colored ham tokens are awesome, the boards are acceptable, and the rulebook is wonderful. I was also not joking when I said half the rulebook is explaining the game and the other half is describing different modes of play, variants, and optional rules (there are even sections of rules for drinkers and 420-friendly players). All said, the components are great!
Now, I have said this multiple times in my reviews: I HATE Cards Against Humanity. That “game” exists for one purpose: to gross out everyone playing and as an acceptable outlet for people to be as offensive as possible. While Game of HAM is similar in some aspects, I can actually play this game and not want to quit two cards into it. I LIKE that the designers have come up with half a rulebook worth of alternate play modes and optional rules, even some that outright tell you that you can use or not use ANY rule in the book! It’s not the classiest game, of course, but you don’t purchase and play a game called “Game of HAM” for its reflection of your sophistication. You purchase and play this game because you want to have a good time with your friends and family without the need to piss everyone at the table off. I can get behind this.
If you are in the market for a CAH or Apples to Apples replacement, but still want to feel like you can be a social monster for a while, pick up Game of HAM (Adult Set). I don’t know this for fact, but I assume that since this is the “Adult Set” that there will soon also be a “Family Set” or something similar. So Game of HAM may be for you, as long as you are aware of the content within. I recommend Game of HAM for those gamers who know and are comfortable with the content as a great modular card game. I won’t be playing it with my in-laws, but I can certainly play this with my siblings!
Game of HAM is a card and board game similar to Apples to Apples and the dreaded Cards Against Humanity. However, HAM differs from these with the addition of the board and actual game play. Yes, each round still needs a judge player and the others to play cards based on a prompt, but after that the game becomes, well, a game. In fact, this game has a board with spaces to travel and a goal space to race to in order to determine the winner.
DISCLAIMER: We were provided a prototype copy of this game for the purposes of this review. These are preview copy components, and the final components will probably be different from these shown. Also, it is not my intention to detail every rule in the game, as there are just too many. You are invited to back the game through the upcoming Kickstarter campaign, order from your FLGS, or purchase through any retailers stocking it after fulfillment. -T
To setup, lay out the modular board pieces in any fashion you would like. We played on a boring 1×4 orientation because we lack imagination. At least at first. Next choose a color token to represent your progress along the board. Separate the colored cards into stacks and place under the corresponding giant ham tokens. Each player will be dealt 10 pink response cards and whomever is chosen to be the first judge player will draw a gray card to begin.
Game of HAM comes shipped with about a million cards and an equal number of ways to play. For this preview we played typical core games without any special rules (and we even left a “mandatory rule” out – the rulebook said we could). Seriously, the first half of the rulebook is explaining the game, and the second half is allllllllll optional gameplay styles, optional rules, variants, and so forth.
So on a turn, the judge draws a gray (grey?) card, reads it, places it on the table, and the other players will play pink (penk?) cards as responses for the judge to choose a winner. The winning player will then reference the numbers on the bottom of the gray card to determine how many spaces on the board they will travel. As the aim of the game is to get to the goal space, typically the larger number will be chosen. However, in order to win the game a player must land on the goal space exactly, so this is a reason a player may choose the lesser number.
At times players will land on colored spaces on the board. This signifies that they will draw a card of corresponding color to be used on future turns. These cards can be very powerful and affect other players as well. It is these cards along with the actual game board that separates Game of HAM from others in this vein: there is actual game play and decisions to be made aside from choosing cards that create the most lewd scenarios.
Don’t get me wrong – there ARE lots and lots of opportunities to create these scenarios and pick gross things (especially in this Adult Set), but this is not the only goal of the game. In any case, play continues in this fashion – for the vanilla game mode – until a player has reached the goal space on the board exactly. At this point, the group decides which game mode or optional rules they would like to play with next, because this game can be somewhat addicting.
Components. This is a ham-themed game and the components reflect that wonderfully. Like I mentioned earlier, there are at least a zillion cards that come in this box, and they are all great quality. I have only opened one of the several packs of pink cards that come with the game, and I am not at all joking about that. The giant colored ham tokens are awesome, the boards are acceptable, and the rulebook is wonderful. I was also not joking when I said half the rulebook is explaining the game and the other half is describing different modes of play, variants, and optional rules (there are even sections of rules for drinkers and 420-friendly players). All said, the components are great!
Now, I have said this multiple times in my reviews: I HATE Cards Against Humanity. That “game” exists for one purpose: to gross out everyone playing and as an acceptable outlet for people to be as offensive as possible. While Game of HAM is similar in some aspects, I can actually play this game and not want to quit two cards into it. I LIKE that the designers have come up with half a rulebook worth of alternate play modes and optional rules, even some that outright tell you that you can use or not use ANY rule in the book! It’s not the classiest game, of course, but you don’t purchase and play a game called “Game of HAM” for its reflection of your sophistication. You purchase and play this game because you want to have a good time with your friends and family without the need to piss everyone at the table off. I can get behind this.
If you are in the market for a CAH or Apples to Apples replacement, but still want to feel like you can be a social monster for a while, pick up Game of HAM (Adult Set). I don’t know this for fact, but I assume that since this is the “Adult Set” that there will soon also be a “Family Set” or something similar. So Game of HAM may be for you, as long as you are aware of the content within. I recommend Game of HAM for those gamers who know and are comfortable with the content as a great modular card game. I won’t be playing it with my in-laws, but I can certainly play this with my siblings!
Gareth von Kallenbach (980 KP) rated Thor (2011) in Movies
Aug 7, 2019
The latest Marvel comic based film has arrived and continues a trend of top-notch cinematic adaptations of Marvel characters. THOR stars Chris Hemsworth as the brash and bold Asgard warrior who is next in line for the kingdoms throne. His father Odin (Anthony Hopkins), has ruled the kingdom for many years and as such has been responsible for maintaining the peace for Asgard and all the other known realms. After being surprised by an incursion by an ancient enemy previously defeated by Odin, the God of Thunder leads a group of warriors on a mission of retribution against his father’s orders which soon has the Asgard people facing the spectre of war.
Instead of his planned coronation, Thor finds himself cast out of Asgard and forced to live as a mortal on Earth. Truly a fish out of water, the brash and arrogant Thor is befriended by scientist Jane Watson (Natalie Portman), the first person Thor encounters upon his arrival. Unsure of his true identity, Jane and her colleagues are drawn to the mysterious stranger despite his tales which, to the humans, are the stuff of ancient Norse legends.
While initially dismissed as a drifter, Thor soon gains the respect of Jane and her colleagues when he stands up to a mysterious government organization that has seized her work. Thor soon finds himself battling enemies on multiple fronts on both his present and former home where he must battle to regain his lost honor and status and prove himself the rightful leader of his people. What follows is a highly entertaining mix of action, comedy, and a touch of romance that sets the film apart from many of its peers.
Director Kenneth Branagh fleshes out the characters from their two-dimensional origins and paces the film well never allowing the elaborate effects or action sequences of the film to overshadow the characters or the story. J. Michael Straczynski used many of the lessons he learned as the creator of the Babylon 5 and in his recent work with Marvel comics to provide a character-driven story that is true to the source material while providing interweaving storylines and ever-changing characters.
The supporting cast was strong, especially Tom Hiddleston as Thor’s younger sibling Loki. The visuals of the film match the action perfectly as Asgard and some of the other realms are truly breathtaking. The only issue I had with the film was that, sadly, Paramount felt the need to use a post filming 3-D conversion on the film which in my opinion offered very little to the finished product. Had the film been shot with 3-D cameras it truly would’ve taken it to the next level but as it was actually done, the 3D conversion offers little to the visual experience.
Hemsworth commands the screen in every scene in which he appears. He is a charismatic presence that deftly walks the line between brash warrior and leader seeking redemption, who never lets his performance become cartoony or forced. I absolutely loved every part the film from beginning to end and in my opinion Thor has set the bar very high for the next series of comic book themed movies to aspire to and is not to be missed.
Instead of his planned coronation, Thor finds himself cast out of Asgard and forced to live as a mortal on Earth. Truly a fish out of water, the brash and arrogant Thor is befriended by scientist Jane Watson (Natalie Portman), the first person Thor encounters upon his arrival. Unsure of his true identity, Jane and her colleagues are drawn to the mysterious stranger despite his tales which, to the humans, are the stuff of ancient Norse legends.
While initially dismissed as a drifter, Thor soon gains the respect of Jane and her colleagues when he stands up to a mysterious government organization that has seized her work. Thor soon finds himself battling enemies on multiple fronts on both his present and former home where he must battle to regain his lost honor and status and prove himself the rightful leader of his people. What follows is a highly entertaining mix of action, comedy, and a touch of romance that sets the film apart from many of its peers.
Director Kenneth Branagh fleshes out the characters from their two-dimensional origins and paces the film well never allowing the elaborate effects or action sequences of the film to overshadow the characters or the story. J. Michael Straczynski used many of the lessons he learned as the creator of the Babylon 5 and in his recent work with Marvel comics to provide a character-driven story that is true to the source material while providing interweaving storylines and ever-changing characters.
The supporting cast was strong, especially Tom Hiddleston as Thor’s younger sibling Loki. The visuals of the film match the action perfectly as Asgard and some of the other realms are truly breathtaking. The only issue I had with the film was that, sadly, Paramount felt the need to use a post filming 3-D conversion on the film which in my opinion offered very little to the finished product. Had the film been shot with 3-D cameras it truly would’ve taken it to the next level but as it was actually done, the 3D conversion offers little to the visual experience.
Hemsworth commands the screen in every scene in which he appears. He is a charismatic presence that deftly walks the line between brash warrior and leader seeking redemption, who never lets his performance become cartoony or forced. I absolutely loved every part the film from beginning to end and in my opinion Thor has set the bar very high for the next series of comic book themed movies to aspire to and is not to be missed.
Purple Phoenix Games (2266 KP) rated Tales & Games: The Three Little Pigs in Tabletop Games
Aug 18, 2020
The Wolf always gets a bad rap. Think of all the stories you know that include an anthropomorphic wolf and tell me three that show The Wolf in a positive light. Can’t think of any? Me neither. But they need to eat to survive and it’s tough in these streets! errm, trees! Such is the plight of The Wolf in this one, as he is attempting to wrest the Little Pigs out of their hidey-holes so he can have a nice bacon dinner. And honestly, who can blame him? Bacon!
Tales & Games: The Three Little Pigs (which I will fondly refer to as 3LP for the remainder of this review) is a cute little family dice and take-that game about building houses for maximum points while avoiding The Wolf’s hungry advances. The winner of the game is the Little Piggy who has built the most complete structures using the best materials that afford them the most endgame points.
To setup, sort the building tiles by material type and house level type as shown inside the box cover. Place the dice and spinner nearby. Let the youngest or cutest player go first. The game is now ready to be played!
On a player’s turn they will roll all the dice Yahtzee-style (so with two re-roll attempts), and the remainder of the turn is based on what is rolled. Players are not required to re-roll, but must stop once two or more Wolf symbols are rolled, or after the second re-roll. The player may then use the dice to purchase house materials corresponding to what was rolled. If three doors are rolled, a player may purchase a straw door (which cost two door symbols) or a wooden door (which cost three door symbols). These house parts can be of mixed materials, so once the pieces have been purchased, house construction can then be done.
Should a player roll The Wolf, then the “breath” spinner will be spun. The player who rolled The Wolf dice will choose an opponent AND one of their houses to target. Spin the spinner and destroy all matching pieces in their house. Some children have issues with this, but hey, they should have built more brick sections! Play continues in this fashion taking turns rolling and purchasing and building until several stacks of house sections are gone (depending on player count). All incomplete houses are crumbled, and piggy faces on standing houses are scored to determine the victor! When playing with my kiddo I don’t use the bonus cards, but they are available if playing with older and more strategic players.
Components. As this is one of the famed (and first in the line) Tales & Games Bookshelf games, it has set a standard for the series. These games come in boxes that look like books on the outside, open like a book, and contain a story to be read as a prelude to the game, if wished. The box is very very cool, and the insert is pink and wonderfully designed. The house tiles are thick and colorful, and the pink dice are just a joy to roll. I love the components in this one!
So obviously this is a game really designed to target younger gamers. And though it says 7+ on the box, I have successfully played this with my 3 year old with zero issues. He loves it, and in turn, makes me love it too. Now, I will certainly not pull this out at any given Game Night with adults (unless we have gamer spouses or friends who have NEVER played modern games at all). However, I really do enjoy playing it with my son for now, and for super-newbies. It is colorful, light on rules, offers some choices, and of course, has a touch of luck and take-that. All this while still feeling like you are in the story of The Three Little Pigs. So I say, if you were ever on the fence with this one – get it. Play it with whomever you like and just enjoy it. It is light enough with just a touch of adultness to keep you smiling. But don’t invite your Twilight Imperium or Mage Knight friends. They won’t like it. We at Purple Phoenix Games know how to get down with the simpler games as well, so that’s why we give this one a blown-over 9 / 12.
Tales & Games: The Three Little Pigs (which I will fondly refer to as 3LP for the remainder of this review) is a cute little family dice and take-that game about building houses for maximum points while avoiding The Wolf’s hungry advances. The winner of the game is the Little Piggy who has built the most complete structures using the best materials that afford them the most endgame points.
To setup, sort the building tiles by material type and house level type as shown inside the box cover. Place the dice and spinner nearby. Let the youngest or cutest player go first. The game is now ready to be played!
On a player’s turn they will roll all the dice Yahtzee-style (so with two re-roll attempts), and the remainder of the turn is based on what is rolled. Players are not required to re-roll, but must stop once two or more Wolf symbols are rolled, or after the second re-roll. The player may then use the dice to purchase house materials corresponding to what was rolled. If three doors are rolled, a player may purchase a straw door (which cost two door symbols) or a wooden door (which cost three door symbols). These house parts can be of mixed materials, so once the pieces have been purchased, house construction can then be done.
Should a player roll The Wolf, then the “breath” spinner will be spun. The player who rolled The Wolf dice will choose an opponent AND one of their houses to target. Spin the spinner and destroy all matching pieces in their house. Some children have issues with this, but hey, they should have built more brick sections! Play continues in this fashion taking turns rolling and purchasing and building until several stacks of house sections are gone (depending on player count). All incomplete houses are crumbled, and piggy faces on standing houses are scored to determine the victor! When playing with my kiddo I don’t use the bonus cards, but they are available if playing with older and more strategic players.
Components. As this is one of the famed (and first in the line) Tales & Games Bookshelf games, it has set a standard for the series. These games come in boxes that look like books on the outside, open like a book, and contain a story to be read as a prelude to the game, if wished. The box is very very cool, and the insert is pink and wonderfully designed. The house tiles are thick and colorful, and the pink dice are just a joy to roll. I love the components in this one!
So obviously this is a game really designed to target younger gamers. And though it says 7+ on the box, I have successfully played this with my 3 year old with zero issues. He loves it, and in turn, makes me love it too. Now, I will certainly not pull this out at any given Game Night with adults (unless we have gamer spouses or friends who have NEVER played modern games at all). However, I really do enjoy playing it with my son for now, and for super-newbies. It is colorful, light on rules, offers some choices, and of course, has a touch of luck and take-that. All this while still feeling like you are in the story of The Three Little Pigs. So I say, if you were ever on the fence with this one – get it. Play it with whomever you like and just enjoy it. It is light enough with just a touch of adultness to keep you smiling. But don’t invite your Twilight Imperium or Mage Knight friends. They won’t like it. We at Purple Phoenix Games know how to get down with the simpler games as well, so that’s why we give this one a blown-over 9 / 12.
Chris Sawin (602 KP) rated The Midnight Meat Train (2008) in Movies
Jun 19, 2019
Step Away from the Meat
The Midnight Meat Train is a horror film based on the short story of the same name written by Clive Barker. The story was published in the first volume of Barker’s Books of Blood short story collection. The Books of Blood totaled six volumes with four to five stories in each volume and were published between 1984 and 1985. The first volume made Barker an overnight success with Stephen King hailing Barker as, “the future of horror.”
The screenplay for the 2008 film was written by Jeff Buhler (writer for the 2019 remakes of Jacob’s Ladder, Pet Sematary, and The Grudge) and directed by Ryuhei Kitamura (Versus, Godzilla: Final Wars). Bradley Cooper stars as a struggling photographer named Leon Kauffman. While he’s secured a job as a photographer, he hasn’t been recognized as a professional just yet. But Leon has a meeting with a professional artist named Susan Hoff (Brooke Shields) that could potentially change his career status. In Leon’s eyes, he doesn’t think that any other photographer has really captured the heart of the city and that’s what he aims to do with his work. However, Susan’s criticism is that Leon is failing at his dream and to only see her again once he finds what he’s looking for.
Leon confronts some thugs during a mugging and documents the ordeal with his camera. The pictures impress Susan and she tells Leon that he’ll be featured in her next show if he brings her two more shots like the newest ones. Leon encounters Mahogany (Vinnie Jones), a butcher that works at a meat packing plant. Leon develops an obsession over Mahogany and stalks him constantly while photographing him wherever he goes. Leon suspects that Mahogany and the train he takes so late at night are the cause for so many missing people over the past three years. Leon doesn’t know how these people disappear until he follows Mahogany onto the train one fateful evening. But this operation is much more complex and dangerous than Leon first realized and his life is forever altered because of it.
This is one of the few times where the short story that inspired the film was read before seeing it. This is coming from someone who is a sporadic reader at best, but Clive Barker has been a personal favorite author for as long as this cynically bonkers brain can remember. Most of the films based on Clive Barker’s works come from The Books of Blood; Book of Blood (Volume One), Dread (Volume Two), Rawhead Rex (Volume Three), Quicksilver Highway (Volume Four, “The Body Politik”), Candyman (Volume Five, “The Forbidden”), and Lord of Illusions (Volume Six, “The Last Illusion”). Barker has always been able to build these incredibly terrifying worlds in his writing with demented characters while maintaining this richly horrifying atmosphere. Thinking so highly of Barker and admiring his work so much made expectations a little high for this film. This is also Ryuhei Kitamura’s first American and English-speaking film. The Midnight Meat Train is one of the few times where the final product actually exceeded expectations.
The Midnight Meat Train pays more attention to blood, gore, and thrills than actually attempting to be scary. The kills in the film are exceptional and director of photography Jonathan Sela (John Wick, Atomic Blonde, Deadpool 2) delivers some incredibly captivating cinematography. There’s a scene where Mahogany knocks a woman’s head off her shoulders with his mallet that he’s always carrying around, but you see it all from her perspective; she puts her hands up as a last defense before the final blow, the room spins, the camera focuses on Mahogany and the headless corpse, he lowers his mallet as she blinks a few times, and the camera pans out from her eyeball to show her severed head.
Vinnie Jones has an overwhelming and powerful performance in The Midnight Meat Train. He doesn’t have much in the way of dialogue, but he makes a massive impact on screen because of his enormous presence. The English actor is 6’2”, so you’re already drawn to this big guy when he enters a room anyway, but give him a gigantic meat mallet and a desire to kill and he evolves into this unstoppable monster that many would consider frightening. Jones knows how to utilize his facial expressions and body language in a way that says more than any string of dialogue would.
The one issue with the film is that every person seemed to be able to sense when somebody else was behind them. While it made for some intriguing camera shots, the execution killed whatever attempts at suspense The Midnight Meat Train was going for. It would have been more satisfying to see at least one person get shanked or clocked in the temple without expecting it.
The Midnight Meat Train is a relentless gorefest that remains true to its source material. The horror film is worth a watch for any fan of Clive Barker’s work or horror films in general. There was this sinking gut feeling that the film wouldn’t keep the ending in tact since it seemed like it wouldn’t translate well on-screen. Without giving too much away, the ending is completely satisfying to those who are familiar with the short story. This is a remarkably excellent horror film that fails to get the recognition it deserves.
The Midnight Meat Train is currently streaming on Amazon Prime, YouTube, and Google Play for $1.99, on Vudu for $2.99, and iTunes for $3.99. The Multi-Format Blu-ray (which is the unrated director’s cut version of the film) is currently $6.50 with prime shipping on Amazon Prime and the DVD is running for $9.99 with prime shipping. On eBay, the pre-owned DVD is $4.58, the brand new DVD is $8.49, and the new Multi-Format Blu-ray is $10.98 and all three have free shipping.
The screenplay for the 2008 film was written by Jeff Buhler (writer for the 2019 remakes of Jacob’s Ladder, Pet Sematary, and The Grudge) and directed by Ryuhei Kitamura (Versus, Godzilla: Final Wars). Bradley Cooper stars as a struggling photographer named Leon Kauffman. While he’s secured a job as a photographer, he hasn’t been recognized as a professional just yet. But Leon has a meeting with a professional artist named Susan Hoff (Brooke Shields) that could potentially change his career status. In Leon’s eyes, he doesn’t think that any other photographer has really captured the heart of the city and that’s what he aims to do with his work. However, Susan’s criticism is that Leon is failing at his dream and to only see her again once he finds what he’s looking for.
Leon confronts some thugs during a mugging and documents the ordeal with his camera. The pictures impress Susan and she tells Leon that he’ll be featured in her next show if he brings her two more shots like the newest ones. Leon encounters Mahogany (Vinnie Jones), a butcher that works at a meat packing plant. Leon develops an obsession over Mahogany and stalks him constantly while photographing him wherever he goes. Leon suspects that Mahogany and the train he takes so late at night are the cause for so many missing people over the past three years. Leon doesn’t know how these people disappear until he follows Mahogany onto the train one fateful evening. But this operation is much more complex and dangerous than Leon first realized and his life is forever altered because of it.
This is one of the few times where the short story that inspired the film was read before seeing it. This is coming from someone who is a sporadic reader at best, but Clive Barker has been a personal favorite author for as long as this cynically bonkers brain can remember. Most of the films based on Clive Barker’s works come from The Books of Blood; Book of Blood (Volume One), Dread (Volume Two), Rawhead Rex (Volume Three), Quicksilver Highway (Volume Four, “The Body Politik”), Candyman (Volume Five, “The Forbidden”), and Lord of Illusions (Volume Six, “The Last Illusion”). Barker has always been able to build these incredibly terrifying worlds in his writing with demented characters while maintaining this richly horrifying atmosphere. Thinking so highly of Barker and admiring his work so much made expectations a little high for this film. This is also Ryuhei Kitamura’s first American and English-speaking film. The Midnight Meat Train is one of the few times where the final product actually exceeded expectations.
The Midnight Meat Train pays more attention to blood, gore, and thrills than actually attempting to be scary. The kills in the film are exceptional and director of photography Jonathan Sela (John Wick, Atomic Blonde, Deadpool 2) delivers some incredibly captivating cinematography. There’s a scene where Mahogany knocks a woman’s head off her shoulders with his mallet that he’s always carrying around, but you see it all from her perspective; she puts her hands up as a last defense before the final blow, the room spins, the camera focuses on Mahogany and the headless corpse, he lowers his mallet as she blinks a few times, and the camera pans out from her eyeball to show her severed head.
Vinnie Jones has an overwhelming and powerful performance in The Midnight Meat Train. He doesn’t have much in the way of dialogue, but he makes a massive impact on screen because of his enormous presence. The English actor is 6’2”, so you’re already drawn to this big guy when he enters a room anyway, but give him a gigantic meat mallet and a desire to kill and he evolves into this unstoppable monster that many would consider frightening. Jones knows how to utilize his facial expressions and body language in a way that says more than any string of dialogue would.
The one issue with the film is that every person seemed to be able to sense when somebody else was behind them. While it made for some intriguing camera shots, the execution killed whatever attempts at suspense The Midnight Meat Train was going for. It would have been more satisfying to see at least one person get shanked or clocked in the temple without expecting it.
The Midnight Meat Train is a relentless gorefest that remains true to its source material. The horror film is worth a watch for any fan of Clive Barker’s work or horror films in general. There was this sinking gut feeling that the film wouldn’t keep the ending in tact since it seemed like it wouldn’t translate well on-screen. Without giving too much away, the ending is completely satisfying to those who are familiar with the short story. This is a remarkably excellent horror film that fails to get the recognition it deserves.
The Midnight Meat Train is currently streaming on Amazon Prime, YouTube, and Google Play for $1.99, on Vudu for $2.99, and iTunes for $3.99. The Multi-Format Blu-ray (which is the unrated director’s cut version of the film) is currently $6.50 with prime shipping on Amazon Prime and the DVD is running for $9.99 with prime shipping. On eBay, the pre-owned DVD is $4.58, the brand new DVD is $8.49, and the new Multi-Format Blu-ray is $10.98 and all three have free shipping.
Heather Cranmer (2721 KP) rated Finding Esme in Books
Jan 25, 2020
I love reading middle grade fiction, so when the chance to read and review Finding Esme by Suzanne Crowley came up, I jumped at the chance! I was really glad I got a chance to read Finding Esme because it was such an amazing book!
Esme is a 12 year old girl growing up in the 1970's. Her home life isn't very traditional. Her dad is out somewhere being a wanderer, and her mom is too busy worrying about her dad to look after Esme. The only person that really looks after Esme is her grandma Bee. When Esme finds dinosaur bones (which she'd like to keep secret) on a hill by her house, things start changing for Esme.
I really loved the plot of Finding Esme. There is a touch of magical realism within this book that written very well. Esme and her grandmother have certain gifts. They can find lost things and/or people usually. There's also sightings of ghosts although not spooky ghostly sightings. Suzanne Crowley does such a fantastic job of making the magical realism element seem like it's an every day happening in real life. She also does a fantastic job with Esme's dealing of loss and just with the whole plot overall. Although Finding Esme does start out a bit slow, as well as a bit confusing with a bunch of different names, it quickly picks up the pacing. Also, it because clear which character is which quickly. The wording may be confusing for some as it's written in semi-heavy Texas twang and slang throughout. However, context clues help. It was easyish for me to understand being as I was born and raised in Texas.
I must gush now on the characters found in Finding Esme! They were all so fleshed out and felt like they were actual people I was reading about instead of just being fictitious characters. Bee, Esme's grandmother, was probably my favorite character because I loved her no-nonsense approach to things. June Rain was always in la la land since her husband was always up and missing. My heart ached for her, but at the same time, I was angry with her for not paying more attention to her children, Esme and Bo. Sweetmaw was another great character, and I loved her for watching out for Esme when Esme felt she had no one. Finch, Esme's best friend, cared for Esme very much, and it was obvious throughout the novel. He only wanted what was best for Esme even if she had a hard time figuring that out. I loved little Bo, Esme's younger brother. I can't remember if Bo's age is ever mentioned in Finding Esme. I guessed Bo to be around 7 or so based on how he acted. Esme was a fantastically written main character. I could relate to her on so many levels especially when it came to not feeling loved or wanted. I'm sure we've all felt like this at some point in our lives. Esme was wanting to keep her dinosaur bones (which she endearingly refers to as Louella Goodbones) secret just so she could have at least one thing that was just hers. I was angered when her secret bones were no longer her secret (not a spoiler). I just wanted to hug Esme to let her know that she wasn't alone. She seemed like such a sweet girl who had already had to put up with more things than most children her age.
One main thing I feel that I must mention is this is Finding Esme is listed as being a middle grade book. I guess this is because the main character is 12 years old. I felt like this wasn't a typical middle grade read as it lacks a middle grade feel. The wording and narrative seemed to be written towards more of an older audience especially with mentions of things that happened in the past that a middle grade audience may not know about or understand. I feel like Finding Esme would probably go over most middle grader's head with the language and events that happened. Even though Esme is only 12, I feel like adults would enjoy this more or at least a young adult audience.
Trigger warnings for Finding Esme include death, depression, gun violence (although not graphic), an absent father, and profanity (although it was just the word damnation used once).
Overall, Finding Esme is a fantastical read which will tug at your heartstrings and leave you breathless. It's a quick read that you won't want to put down. At least, I didn't! I never wanted it to end if I'm being honest. I would definitely recommend Finding Esme by Suzanne Crowley to those aged 15+. Yes, it's supposed to be a middle grade read, but as I mentioned before, I really think adults and possibly teens would enjoy it more.
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(A special thank you to Suzanne Crowley for sending me a hardback of Finding Esme in exchange for an honest and unbiased review.)
Esme is a 12 year old girl growing up in the 1970's. Her home life isn't very traditional. Her dad is out somewhere being a wanderer, and her mom is too busy worrying about her dad to look after Esme. The only person that really looks after Esme is her grandma Bee. When Esme finds dinosaur bones (which she'd like to keep secret) on a hill by her house, things start changing for Esme.
I really loved the plot of Finding Esme. There is a touch of magical realism within this book that written very well. Esme and her grandmother have certain gifts. They can find lost things and/or people usually. There's also sightings of ghosts although not spooky ghostly sightings. Suzanne Crowley does such a fantastic job of making the magical realism element seem like it's an every day happening in real life. She also does a fantastic job with Esme's dealing of loss and just with the whole plot overall. Although Finding Esme does start out a bit slow, as well as a bit confusing with a bunch of different names, it quickly picks up the pacing. Also, it because clear which character is which quickly. The wording may be confusing for some as it's written in semi-heavy Texas twang and slang throughout. However, context clues help. It was easyish for me to understand being as I was born and raised in Texas.
I must gush now on the characters found in Finding Esme! They were all so fleshed out and felt like they were actual people I was reading about instead of just being fictitious characters. Bee, Esme's grandmother, was probably my favorite character because I loved her no-nonsense approach to things. June Rain was always in la la land since her husband was always up and missing. My heart ached for her, but at the same time, I was angry with her for not paying more attention to her children, Esme and Bo. Sweetmaw was another great character, and I loved her for watching out for Esme when Esme felt she had no one. Finch, Esme's best friend, cared for Esme very much, and it was obvious throughout the novel. He only wanted what was best for Esme even if she had a hard time figuring that out. I loved little Bo, Esme's younger brother. I can't remember if Bo's age is ever mentioned in Finding Esme. I guessed Bo to be around 7 or so based on how he acted. Esme was a fantastically written main character. I could relate to her on so many levels especially when it came to not feeling loved or wanted. I'm sure we've all felt like this at some point in our lives. Esme was wanting to keep her dinosaur bones (which she endearingly refers to as Louella Goodbones) secret just so she could have at least one thing that was just hers. I was angered when her secret bones were no longer her secret (not a spoiler). I just wanted to hug Esme to let her know that she wasn't alone. She seemed like such a sweet girl who had already had to put up with more things than most children her age.
One main thing I feel that I must mention is this is Finding Esme is listed as being a middle grade book. I guess this is because the main character is 12 years old. I felt like this wasn't a typical middle grade read as it lacks a middle grade feel. The wording and narrative seemed to be written towards more of an older audience especially with mentions of things that happened in the past that a middle grade audience may not know about or understand. I feel like Finding Esme would probably go over most middle grader's head with the language and events that happened. Even though Esme is only 12, I feel like adults would enjoy this more or at least a young adult audience.
Trigger warnings for Finding Esme include death, depression, gun violence (although not graphic), an absent father, and profanity (although it was just the word damnation used once).
Overall, Finding Esme is a fantastical read which will tug at your heartstrings and leave you breathless. It's a quick read that you won't want to put down. At least, I didn't! I never wanted it to end if I'm being honest. I would definitely recommend Finding Esme by Suzanne Crowley to those aged 15+. Yes, it's supposed to be a middle grade read, but as I mentioned before, I really think adults and possibly teens would enjoy it more.
--
(A special thank you to Suzanne Crowley for sending me a hardback of Finding Esme in exchange for an honest and unbiased review.)
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Ivana A. | Diary of Difference (1171 KP) rated Fawkes in Books
Jul 9, 2018
When history meets magic...
Fawkes by Nadine Brandes is one of those books that draws you into a world, enlightens you with its magic, and then sends you back to reality, so you can enlighten others while you glow!
Nadine used the history of Guy Fawkes and the failed attempt to blow the parliament as a base to her story, that follows Guy Fawkes’s son, Thomas, into an incredible magical journey.
‘’A foundation of truth represents what life was intended to be.’’
Thomas is about to get his mask, that is supposed to make him control one colour. He also happens to be affected with the plague, that turns his face into stone. His family are all Keepers, and he, by default is a keeper too. But things are never that simple. What will happen when he might not get his mask, and the plague is about to kill him?
We follow the journey of Thomas through a first - person perspective. He feels incomplete when he has the plague, and all his life he is waiting to get his mask, and to be able to control a colour. Any colour, even though he prefers Grey.
Only with my mask could I bond with a color.
But on the day when he is about to receive his mask from his dad, he learns that his father is in London, and is not willing to come.
Scared for his life, and angry at his father, he goes into an adventure to find him. His father is Guy Fawkes, a Keeper that is involved in a Gunpowder plot, which will kill the whole parliament, and most importantly, the king of England, who is the cause of the plague!
Thomas joins the plot, knowing that this is the last chance for him to survive the plague! If the king is dead, the plague would be gone. But will it?
I never imagined a single moment of acceptance could reverse a year of bitterness and prejudice.
Through Thomas’s eyes, we see a war between the Keepers and the Igniters. It might be a metaphor for the Catholics and Protestants, but I won’t go into this now. The Keepers were loyal to one color only, and Igniters wanted to control all colors. Igniters used the White Colour as a source to control all power. But White Color doesn’t obey like other colours do - the White Color makes people go crazy for power and glory. Something similar to the ring in Lord of The Rings.
‘’Igniters believe that for each Keeper that dies, one person is cured of the plague’’.
We see Thomas caught between two sides - the keepers want to be free of oppression, and the Igniters want to be free to use color speech as they wanted. On such a crossroad, Thomas wants to find the truth for himself. But there is no time, and not many people that he can trust.
‘’You’ve given me your truth. I have to find it for myself for it to become mine. And curiosity is the first step’’.
On his journey, his relationship with Emma becomes stronger. She is an Igniter, and they share different beliefs, and she also knows he has the plague. But she is still around, and she accepts his as he is. And Thomas, taught to always hide his face, because otherwise he would be killed by the Igniters, is able to relax around Emma. This will teach him to accept Emma as she is, once she tells him her secret.
I loved the character of Emma. She is a strong person, but unable to show her true self due to the fact that she is not like the others, that she is not the same. In this book it is also shown quite well how women were underestimated in the 17th century. How they were thought to be unworthy. The only bit I didn’t like about Emma is that, even though such strong character, she would have never fought for herself if Thomas wasn’t there to ‘’save’’ her.
This book is a lovely story about Thomas, and how he finds his true self, how he is not afraid to stand up for the things he believes in, how he learns that he shouldn't be hiding his true self anymore and embrace his fears, as they might turn out to be the best things that ever happened in his life.
‘’Take a breath, Thomas. There has always been fear. There will always be fear. It’s up to us to stand tall, even when the fear demands we bow to it.’’
So yes, my lovely readers, I loved this book so much! I loved the magical moments, I loved how it turned out to be an amazing plot, based on real history events. I loved Thomas’s character, and I loved Emma. I loved Guy Fawkes as well, especially in the end of the book.
If you happen to love these types of books, please get your copy as soon as you can. You won’t regret it at all!
I have received a complimentary copy of this book from Thomas Nelson through NetGalley. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.
Nadine used the history of Guy Fawkes and the failed attempt to blow the parliament as a base to her story, that follows Guy Fawkes’s son, Thomas, into an incredible magical journey.
‘’A foundation of truth represents what life was intended to be.’’
Thomas is about to get his mask, that is supposed to make him control one colour. He also happens to be affected with the plague, that turns his face into stone. His family are all Keepers, and he, by default is a keeper too. But things are never that simple. What will happen when he might not get his mask, and the plague is about to kill him?
We follow the journey of Thomas through a first - person perspective. He feels incomplete when he has the plague, and all his life he is waiting to get his mask, and to be able to control a colour. Any colour, even though he prefers Grey.
Only with my mask could I bond with a color.
But on the day when he is about to receive his mask from his dad, he learns that his father is in London, and is not willing to come.
Scared for his life, and angry at his father, he goes into an adventure to find him. His father is Guy Fawkes, a Keeper that is involved in a Gunpowder plot, which will kill the whole parliament, and most importantly, the king of England, who is the cause of the plague!
Thomas joins the plot, knowing that this is the last chance for him to survive the plague! If the king is dead, the plague would be gone. But will it?
I never imagined a single moment of acceptance could reverse a year of bitterness and prejudice.
Through Thomas’s eyes, we see a war between the Keepers and the Igniters. It might be a metaphor for the Catholics and Protestants, but I won’t go into this now. The Keepers were loyal to one color only, and Igniters wanted to control all colors. Igniters used the White Colour as a source to control all power. But White Color doesn’t obey like other colours do - the White Color makes people go crazy for power and glory. Something similar to the ring in Lord of The Rings.
‘’Igniters believe that for each Keeper that dies, one person is cured of the plague’’.
We see Thomas caught between two sides - the keepers want to be free of oppression, and the Igniters want to be free to use color speech as they wanted. On such a crossroad, Thomas wants to find the truth for himself. But there is no time, and not many people that he can trust.
‘’You’ve given me your truth. I have to find it for myself for it to become mine. And curiosity is the first step’’.
On his journey, his relationship with Emma becomes stronger. She is an Igniter, and they share different beliefs, and she also knows he has the plague. But she is still around, and she accepts his as he is. And Thomas, taught to always hide his face, because otherwise he would be killed by the Igniters, is able to relax around Emma. This will teach him to accept Emma as she is, once she tells him her secret.
I loved the character of Emma. She is a strong person, but unable to show her true self due to the fact that she is not like the others, that she is not the same. In this book it is also shown quite well how women were underestimated in the 17th century. How they were thought to be unworthy. The only bit I didn’t like about Emma is that, even though such strong character, she would have never fought for herself if Thomas wasn’t there to ‘’save’’ her.
This book is a lovely story about Thomas, and how he finds his true self, how he is not afraid to stand up for the things he believes in, how he learns that he shouldn't be hiding his true self anymore and embrace his fears, as they might turn out to be the best things that ever happened in his life.
‘’Take a breath, Thomas. There has always been fear. There will always be fear. It’s up to us to stand tall, even when the fear demands we bow to it.’’
So yes, my lovely readers, I loved this book so much! I loved the magical moments, I loved how it turned out to be an amazing plot, based on real history events. I loved Thomas’s character, and I loved Emma. I loved Guy Fawkes as well, especially in the end of the book.
If you happen to love these types of books, please get your copy as soon as you can. You won’t regret it at all!
I have received a complimentary copy of this book from Thomas Nelson through NetGalley. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own.