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Baby Dragon Bedtime
Baby Dragon Bedtime
2018 | Bluff, Card Game, Kids Game, Memory, Real-time
You know, I never really considered the childhood of dragons. I saw a version of what it COULD be whilst watching A Game of Thrones, but I’m sure not all dragons are brought up that way. In fact, it turns out that baby dragons are quite similar to my children: they never really want to go to bed. Most of the time it’s really okay, but there are moments Mommy and Daddy just need SLEEP. So when we call up to the kids to get ready for bed, they scramble to get everything cleaned up (well, in my fantasy world, anyway), and so do dragons. But they clean up their hoards of gold and treasure, whereas my kids just need to pick up four Paw Patrol figures… and that’s still too much…

In Baby Dragon Bedtime (here forward known as BDB) players will begin the game with a hand of five cards: 2xPeek, 2xGrab, and a Flip. Using these cards during the game will allow players to pick up and Peek at a card on the table, Grab one for their discard pile, or just Flip a card from face-up to face-down or vice versa. Players will be grabbing more action-type cards, Gold cards and Hoard cards, and dreaded Dust Bunnies and Chewing Gum cards.

DISCLAIMER: We were provided a copy of this game for the purposes of this review. This is a retail copy of the game, so what you see in these photos is exactly what would be received in your box. I do not intend to cover every single rule included in the rulebook, but will describe the overall game flow and major rule set so that our readers may get a sense of how the game plays. For more in depth rules, you may purchase a copy online or from your FLGS. -T


To setup, give each player a deck of five starting cards with matching letters printed on the corner (A-G). Shuffle the rest of the cards (if playing with adults) and throw them on the table as shown below. Play will begin when someone counts down or says, “Go!,” or whatever signal is decided.

There are no turns in BDB in an adult game, and players are flipping over their cards from their decks to complete the actions on them. All players are playing simultaneous and games can last one minute or up to five. Anyone may stop playing at any time and “go to sleep,” thus protecting their treasure piles from negative VP cards. Once a player’s deck has run out of cards to draw they may simply flip over their deck, or give a shuffle and draw as normal. In this way a player’s hand is steadily growing, but being bogged down with dead VP (positive or negative) cards. Players may end up Grabbing more action cards and be able to do more actions going through their deck, or it may be simply comprised of VP cards and starting actions, though that seems highly unlikely. Once all players have taken the turns they wish to take, or the game ends via the Mama! card a player has played, players will add up their points from their decks and the winner may then challenge the players to another round.

The game changes a bit when playing with children or if the players wish to have a less frantic experience. In this case, instead of randomly throwing out the cards on the table, a 6×6 grid will be formed on the table and players will take turns revealing their cards from the their decks and choosing cards to Flip, Peek, or Grab. Though the game is suggested for ages 6 or 7+ I was able to have a fun time playing with my 4-year-old son (see below). In fact, BDB is now his favorite game of all time, and I’m completely cool with that. We even were able to play with his grandparents and have a good time… when he wasn’t crying because I Grabbed the Gold card he wanted.
Components. This game is a bunch of cards. They are all fine quality and feature cartoony, non-scary, and colorful dragon art. For a children’s game the art is perfect. For an adult’s game it is lacking. But, I cannot really see much that would satisfy both sides. All in all, the cards are good and should hold up to a fair amount of play. The box is packed pretty tight, though, so be careful not to damage the cards when packing back up.

Like I mentioned, I was able to play this with my 4-year-old son, and he loves it. Any true hobby game I can play with my son at that age is a winner for me. Baby Dragon Bedtime is not a strategic game, but more based on memory and luck of the draw. So if you are searching for a uniquely-themed real-time deck-builder that can be played with children AND/OR adults, then check out Baby Dragon Bedtime. It is quick and simple, and rewards players who allow the youngsters to win. Purple Phoenix Games gives this a 15 / 18 for versatility and gameplay.
  
Her Wicked Ways
Her Wicked Ways
8
8.0 (1 Ratings)
Book Rating
Contains spoilers, click to show
Genre: Historical

Word Count: 101, 790

Average Goodreads Rating: 3.62/ 5 stars

My rating: 4/ 5 stars

This book has a slightly shaky start, like most romance novels do, but it pulls me in pretty quickly. It starts off with Montgomery “Fox” Foxcroft committing highway robbery to save an orphanage. Yeah, starts off like your run-of-the-mill soap opera.

The job is supposed to be simple for Fox. Rob a corrupt MP to support the orphanage he runs. Unbeknownst to him, this MP is carrying something even more precious than money. He’s transporting a disgraced heiress named Miranda Sinclair. Miranda’s a beautiful woman who distracts Fox so much that he forgets he’s committing a crime to save some kids and ends up making out with her. Not his finest moment. But it does give him an idea. To seduce Miranda and marry her for her money. But when she starts volunteering at his orphanage, he realizes that she’s not just a spoiled heiress, but also likeable, capable, and someone that he might even grown to love.


This story is fantastic! I re-read it when I realized I hadn’t written a review for it, and it was good even the second time around. Both Miranda and Fox are excellent and the chemistry between them is spot-on.

Miranda comes off as entitled at first, and she is, but she grows out of that pretty quickly. In truth, she’s a very strong person who regularly rebels against the restricting rules of London Society, because come on, why would anyone want to live by those rules? Despite everyone calling her incompetent and useless, she’s smart and very capable. She steals a kiss out of Fox the first time she meets him, and she raises more money for the orphanage in one night than Fox managed to raise in an entire year.

Where I shall stay when we get there. Is this Stratham’s house adequate?” (Her brother asked)

“Yes, more than. You’ll be quite comfortable. Are you sure you’re allowed to stay there?”

“Ah, sweet sister, when will you realize the rules are not the same for you and me?”

But Miranda knew all too well. Perhaps that was why she always broke them.

The only irritating thing about Miranda is that she bends easily to her parents’ will. And while I get that they are her parents, it frustrates me to no end that she complied so quickly, even when it hurt Fox and she didn’t agree with them to begin with. I also hate that she didn’t figure out that Fox was the highwayman. Sure, she might not associate a random, masked stranger with the impoverished owner of an orphanage right away. But then she meets the highwayman again… and then sees Fox again…. she knows she feels the same lust with both of them, and she still doesn’t figure it out? Oh please, she’s smarter than that.


Fox is incredibly lovable, despite his ridiculous jealousy over just about every man that Miranda comes in contact with. He gets jealous over Miranda’s former lover who’s so unimportant he doesn’t even turn up, and he gets jealous over Stratham. He even gets jealous over one of his charges when Miranda compliments the boy’s new haircut. Possessive much?

However, I do like how wonderfully insecure Fox is. Despite being confident in most areas of his life, and refusing to think people in higher class were better than him, Fox is constantly unsure around Miranda. He thinks she’s totally out of his league, even at the end.

 “That you would give yourself to me is incredibly humbling.”

A twinge of embarrassment heated her face. “Why?”

He smiled. “Because you’re Miranda. A goddess to my mere mortality. I am a beast beside you.”

Damn. Montgomery Foxcroft sure knows how to woo a woman.

And he is so hopelessly in love with her. Even when he was desperate for money, he wasn’t willing to force Miranda to marry him by compromising her because he didn’t want her to hate him. And even though his original intention in courting her was to get her money, he started appreciating her for much more. Unlike her parents, he saw her for the brilliant woman she was and was quick to defend her to anyone who said otherwise.

Love.

The word drove a knife clean through his heart. Did he love her? He didn’t know, but he wanted her for more than money. More than desire. He wanted her here. With him. With all of them. He’d never seen the children so happy. So light. He’d never felt so happy or light—and that said a lot given his cursed financial woes.

He also doesn’t ever want her change. Unlike everyone else in this story, including her brother, the only immediate family member she has who is remotely nice to her, Fox doesn’t think she has to change, and doesn’t even want her to.

“You’re staring at me like I’m food again.” His words heightened her arousal and further emboldened her.

She feasted on his male beauty. “I’ve never seen anything as delicious as you.”

“Christ, Miranda. Ladies don’t talk like that.”

She traced her fingers around his nipples and watched them tighten. Her own hardened in response. “You don’t like it?”

He swallowed audibly. “I like it fine.”
  
40x40

Purple Phoenix Games (2266 KP) rated Steam Park in Tabletop Games

Aug 15, 2019 (Updated Aug 19, 2021)  
Steam Park
Steam Park
2013 | City Building, Dice Game, Real-time, Science Fiction
Who couldn’t go for a nice week or weekend at a fancy theme park these days? I think even our Alexas and Googles would like to catch some rays in their robot bodies, if they had them. Welcome to Steam Park, where all your robots can enjoy themselves on roller coasters, visit vendor stands, and also create metric tons of dirt. You ready?


Steam Park is a real-time dice rolling, theme park building, negative VP mitigating game for two to four players. In it players are theme park owners who are attempting to build the greatest park in the land hoping to attract many robots and keep their parks squeaky clean. The game spans six rounds of four phases and the player with the most VP at the game end will be the winner!
To setup, separate all the different components by type and color and shuffle the cards into a face-down deck. Deal each player six dice, one large starting tile to build upon, six cards from which they will choose to keep three, and one pig board. The game may now begin!

The four phases of each round are Roll, Dirt, Actions, and Income. During the Roll phase players will simultaneously be rolling their dice until they get a result they like. The first player to finish will quickly grab the First Player token in the middle of the table. Each other player may continue rolling as much as they like, but the turn order tokens will be taken one by one until they are all gone. Bonuses exist for the First and Second Player tokens and a negative bonus for the last player (more Dirt).

The Dirt phase causes each player to add Dirt tokens to their park according to the number of Dirt symbols rolled on their dice as well as the number of visitors currently in their park. The player who nabbed the First Player token can now discard four Dirt tokens from the bonus while the last player will add two more Dirt tokens to their park.

Actions that can be taken during the next phase include: Building Rides, Building Vendor Stands, Attracting Visitors, Cleaning Dirt, Playing Bonus Cards, and Expanding the Park. Each of these actions cost symbols rolled on the dice. To build a ride of capacity three, then three Build symbols would need to be spent from those rolled, et al. The only Action that requires no specific symbol is the Expand the Park. Use any symbol to add on a small square tile to the existing park layout.

Players will collect $3 (not USD, just the game money) for every visitor enjoying their park amenities during this Income phase. If a player has less than three Bonus Cards they may draw two from the deck and choose one to take in hand.


The game continues in this fashion over the course of six rounds total and once the final Income phase has been completed players will consult the Final Dirt Track to see how much will need to be paid in Dirt fees. Whomever ends the game with the most money wins!
Components. This game has a LOT of cardboard components. Nearly everything in the box is medium-quality cardboard and generally fine. The art is quirky, whimsical, and endearing. The insert leaves much to be desired so I made my own out of foam board. I have no complaints about the components except that I wish I could visit some of the rides, and I am still not super sure why the dice locking area is a metal pig token.

I originally played Josh’s copy he brought over to my house. I fell in love with it right away, and I still very much enjoy it. It will never make my Top 10 Games of All Time, but I will cherish my copy. I have yet to add in the Play Dirty expansion for it, as I like the base game so well, but I plan to sometime soon.

What I like most about it is the real-time rolling of the dice coupled with the grabbing of the turn order tokens when satisfied. This means that I could just go with what I roll after one roll, or I can take my time and just accept the Dirt coming my way. Sometimes being last and taking that extra Dirt is worth having all the dice read what you really want.

I also like having a lot of vendor stands in my park. Finding room for them is a different story, but I end up usually having just a few rides and mostly stands. They each provide some different benefit or way to change up the game a little that I just love to take advantage of them.

I adore games with real-time dice rolling, so I was predisposed to being attracted to Steam Park. Coupled with the great overall theme, this is an easy win for me, and a prized entry in my collection. In fact, I’m not the only one of us who thinks this as Purple Phoenix Games gives Steam Park a monotone-robot-thrill-seeker-scream 14 / 18. If you are tiring of Escape: The Curse of the Temple (which is possible), then pick up a copy of Steam Park. It will spark your joy of frantic dice rolling once more!
  
Formula 51 (2002)
Formula 51 (2002)
2002 | Action
4
4.0 (1 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Story: The 51st State starts in 1971 California where Elmo McElroy (Jackson) getting caught smoking weed losing he recently receive diploma in pharmacy. Move forward 30 years Elmo works as a drug maker for The Lizard (Meat Loaf). We learn that Dakota (Mortimer) owes The Lizard a debt which she pays off with her assassin skills. Elmo has taken it upon himself to escape The Lizard but he doesn’t get the job done, this leads to The Lizard giving Dakota a chance to clean her slate for good by sending her to kill Elmo and the drug dealer who never turned up for the deal Durant (Tomlinson).

Next we meet Felix DeSouza (Carlyle) a fellow dealer who is happy to live in Manchester while cheering for Liverpool putting him into conflict when he doesn’t need too. Felix has to deliver Elmo to Durant to help with the latest deal as Elmo brings his product to England but to keep things interesting Dakota just so happens to be Felix’s ex make the assassination attempt difficult due to the personal side.

It is up to Felix and Elmo to try and work out a deal in the city before the time runs out with Dakota trying to track down Elmo to for The Lizard. All this while determined detective Kane (Pertwee) want in on the action and to stop the deal taking place. All these factors lead to the final outcome of the film when we find out just who is playing who.

The 51st State is a film that really made me want to switch it off very early because the needless amount of swearing and aggressive toning of the language just seemed to be there because someone couldn’t think of any real words. I wasn’t the most interested in this film because of the heavy drug use either because I feel drugs over use makes people out to stupid because not everyone needs drugs but the films seems to make the point everyone does. After getting through the opening half of the film and getting used the poorly written script the story does unfold to be quite interesting. We get plenty of twists and turn along the way and the final twist does actually make you smile because of how Elmo has handled it all. (5/10)

 

Actor Review

 

Samuel L Jackson: Elmo McElroy is the most wanted chemist in the world of drugs, he decides to leave his old market behind and take his work to England where he gets stuck in the middle of a battle for power between the drug lords. Samuel does end up giving us a performance you would expect but his image if something that will shock with his kilt. (7/10)

 elmo

Robert Carlyle: Felix DeSouza is the hot head Liverpool fan who works for a drug lord in the city but when things get out of hand he has to help settle the deal for Elmo and his price tickets to Liverpool v Manchester United. Robert gives the performance you would expect from the British star. (7/10)

robert

Emily Mortimer: Dakota Parker is the deadly beautiful assassin who is working off a debt from The Lizard, she has history with Felix but is working on catching Elmo for The Lizard. Emily does a good job as the assassin with a past. (7/10)

 dakota

Meat Loaf: The Lizard is the American drug lord that has been double crossed by Elmo but he isn’t taking it lightly when he sends his best assassin to bring him back to complete the business deal they had going down. Meat Loaf does end up giving a performance you wouldn’t expect from the musician. (7/10)

 

Rhys Ifans: Iki is the local dealer who can help get the deal done in Liverpool once everything gets out of hand. He is playing both sides because he is the go to guy in the city. Rhys is one of the best over the top crazy performers in the acting work and he shows why here. (7/10)

 ike

Support Cast: The 51st State has a supporting cast that includes plenty of different characters involved in the drug world that all help motive our characters.

 

Director Review: Ronny Yu – Ronny does try to give us a crime caper but does he need to just have the characters swearing for the sake of it. (5/10)

 

Action: The 51st State has a couple of fights but most of the action is almost happening. (5/10)

Crime: The 51st State puts us in a drug world well giving us a mixture of colourful characters. (8/10)

Thriller: The 51st State doesn’t pull you in as much as it should because we think everything is done and dusted early on and by the time it has changed we are not sure what to think. (6/10)

Settings: The 51st State uses the setting of Liverpool very well making everything feel like a normal day with the crime happening around it. (8/10)

Suggestion: The 51st State is one to try, I think if you are a fan of the genre you will enjoy but otherwise it might end up feeling like too much. (Try It)

 

Best Part: Final deal.

Worst Part: Too much needless aggressive swearing.

 

Believability: No (0/10)

Chances of Tears: No (0/10)

Chances of Sequel: No

Post Credits Scene: Early on in the credits.

 

Oscar Chances: No

Budget: $28 Million

Runtime: 1 Hour 33 Minutes

Tagline: In a world of shady characters and dirty deals, this is just business as usual.

 

Overall: This is a typical over aggressive drug filled film that has a twist that makes it more enjoyable.

https://moviesreview101.com/2015/12/11/the-51st-state-2001/
  
The Hollow Ones: the Blackwood Tapes Vol. 1
The Hollow Ones: the Blackwood Tapes Vol. 1
Guillermo del Toro, Chuck Hogan | 2020 | Mystery, Paranormal, Science Fiction/Fantasy, Thriller
8
8.0 (2 Ratings)
Book Rating
Paranormal and occult (1 more)
Great story
A filler character with potential (1 more)
Overly used details
[This is the ARC version - - - John Silence was renamed Hugo Blackwood in the final version]

I've grown up watching a lot of Guillermo Del Toro's movies. One of my favorites that he was the screenwriter for is Hellboy. Yet, I spent almost four months at the beginning of this year playing the video game Death Stranding, which features Del Toro as a main character. I bring the former and latter up because they rank very high on some of my favorite things list, and I believe that The Hollow Ones is one of the best books I have read in a long time. This is one of those few rare books which I wish I could live in as a lover of the paranormal/occult.

Odessa Hardwicke - - - an FBI greenhorn - - - is ordering dinner with her partner, Walt Leppo, when they get a phone call that someone is on a shooting rampage from an airplane. (Hardwicke looks up to Leppo as a father figure, and he sees her as a daughter) We learn that the two have been on a corruption case involving a politician's former deputy chief of staff- - - they suddenly realize that the airplane may be tied to this man, and he may also be the one going on the killing spree. The pair speed off to the deputy chief's home in fear that he may be going to kill his recently divorced wife, who was waiting to receive not only their huge house, but a nice lump sum of money.

When Hardwicke and Leppo get to the house, after stopping the deputy chief, Hardwicke suddenly finds herself holding a gun on her partner while he tries to murder a little girl. She has only two choices to make: a) kill her partner, and face the backlash of shooting an agent in the line-of-duty or b) let him kill the girl and possibly herself- - - Hardwicke chooses to shoot and kill Leppo. Immediately after this, she sees something like a heatwave leave Leppo's body and disappear. When other agents arrive to the crime scene, Hardwicke keeps this information to herself, wanting to know instead why her partner suddenly turned into a murderer. Pending an investigation, Hardwicke is put on desk duty, including errands that the Bureau doesn't want to deal with. Enter Agent Earl Solomon.

On order by the FBI, Hardwicke is sent to clean out an office used by a retired agent that was hospitalized for a stroke. She takes his things to the hospital (not knowing what to do with them), and while discussing her plight with him and revealing that she had seen a sort of heat vapor leave Leppo's body, Solomon quickly tells her to write a letter to a man named John Silence, and place it in a nearly invisible mailbox in the Wallstreet area of New York.

From this point on, the book really begins to take off, and the fact that the authors brought in the religion of Palo (the Mayombe branch) is fascinating for anyone interested in the occult. The buildup of the story is really enjoyable, too, especially when Hardwicke decides to write and deliver the letter.

Readers also get to see Solomon's story from years before when he was one of the first African Americans to be recruited into the FBI. We see Solomon being sent to Mississippi in 1962, where a number of lynchings of African Americans have occurred, but the FBI hasn't been called in until the last murder: a lynching of a white man. Solomon can't help but question if he was only brought on this case because he is African American. Ignoring the bigotry, Solomon does his job, and comes across a young boy who is possessed by some sort of demon. The boy tells Solomon to bring him Silence, a man who Solomon has never heard of.

John Silence is also an interesting character; a nearly 500-year-old occult detective. We also get to see flashbacks of his life in the 1500's, learning about his occupation as a barrister, and his first encounter with the paranormal- - - something that has plagued him since- - - as well as his teacher in the occult. In the chapters of today, Silence is a mysterious figure, and carries himself much like a modern day Sherlock Holmes. Even by the end of the book, readers are still left with questions over what Silence has been through in the last 500 years. He, having only met Solomon 58 years prior- - - the two have a huge history together. Proven by the fact of how many 'cases' Solomon has hidden in his private records room that the two have embarked on together.

The Hollow Ones is a very enjoyable book, but I could only give it 3 out of 5 stars. The rating is because the authors- - - Del Toro and Hogan- - - used so many details, like the make and model of a passing vehicle, that it would interrupt the flow of the story, being bogged down by it. One other problem that I had was with the character Laurena; she was a 'filler character' (a character that is brought in just to make something happen in the story), but she was written to be Hardwicke's best friend. This was highly unbelievable with the two times she showed up in the story.

I really, really hope that Del Toro and Hogan decide to make this a series, and that the rest of the books show us Solomon's and Silence's journeys together! I highly recommend this book to people who love the paranormal/occult crime books.
  
Bill & Ted Face the Music (2020)
Bill & Ted Face the Music (2020)
2020 | Comedy, Fantasy
Back in 1991, I thought that Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey was the greatest movie of all time. Sure, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure was pretty incredible too, but with the addition of Death… Station… evil robot Bill & Ted… it was all just genius as far as I was concerned. My movie watching habits since the nineties have shown me that neither of those films is actually the greatest of all time (well, maybe top 50), but that certainly didn't stop me from getting ridiculously giddy with excitement at the prospect of a third outing. Even more so after successfully introducing my youngest daughter to both movies recently, at which point I also concluded that Excellent Adventure was, in fact, the better of the two!

So, here we are. 29 years on from Bogus Journey, and we find Bill & Ted at a very difficult time in their lives. Dwindling popularity and record sales mean that their destiny of uniting the world with a single song is now becoming increasingly unlikely. A wedding reception where Bill & Ted are unveiling their latest musical creation to a less than lukewarm reception gives us a nice nostalgic chance to see some familiar faces from the previous movies and also brings us quickly up to speed on the lives of our two heroes. Still married to the medieval princesses (Jayma Mays and Erinn Hayes), they now both have grown-up daughters, Thea (Brigette Lundy-Paine) and Billie (Samara Weaving). Both girls are like younger versions of their fathers, making heavy use of the word ‘dude’, and with extensive musical tastes and knowledge. They worship their fathers though and truly believe in their music.

Following the wedding reception, a trip to couples therapy shows us that it's not just their music career that's heading for the rocks. There's even talk of breaking up the band - “We’ve spent our entire lives trying to unite the world. And I’m tired, dude” Ted confesses to Bill. And as their destiny begins to fracture, reality also starts to unravel, with historical figures randomly being sucked from their own time and dumped into another.

Arriving just in the nick of time is a traveller from the future. Kelly (Kristen Schaal) lands in an egg-shaped time machine and whisks the boys into the future where they find that they are now no longer being worshipped in the same way as they were before. They are told in no uncertain terms that they have just 77 minutes to come up with the song they were destined to write, or the past, present and future are all going to collide, resulting in the world collapsing in on itself. Whoah!

Resigning themselves to the fact that if they haven't been able to come up with the song in the last couple of decades, they're unlikely to come up with it in the next 77 minutes, Bill & Ted land on the genius idea that they can simply go to the future and steal the song from their future selves. So, they begin jumping forward to various points in time and meeting up with different versions of themselves. We get overweight rock star Bill & Ted, complete with dodgy British accents, muscular prison inmate Bill & Ted and even OAP nursing home Bill & Ted.

Meanwhile, daughters Thea and Billie come up with a slightly more solid plan of action that involves picking up prominent musicians from history and forming them into the ultimate band, in the hopes that their combined talents will come up with the song that saves the world. It's a race against time as both missions play out simultaneously, taking in a trip to hell, recruiting ex-band member Death (William Sandler) and trying to outwit a robot who's out to kill them. It's basically a greatest hits remix of the first two movies.

It took some time for me to adjust to seeing Keanu Reeves outside of his role as John Wick, clean-shaven and considerably less dangerous. Both he and Alex Winter are obviously much older than when we last saw them as Bill & Ted, but it was surprising just how well they slipped right back into the roles. It honestly felt so good to be back in the company of these guys. The daughters are also a welcome addition, although they feel underused, and being separated from their fathers for much of the movie means that everything feels a lot more chaotic than we’re used to.

Bill & Ted Face the Music rattles along at a fairly brisk pace and the ending felt very rushed and abrupt. Something about the whole thing just doesn’t feel right and I didn’t feel as though we were ever getting very much time to explore or experience a particular scene before we were straight onto the next. It’s funny at times, but with most of it essentially reworking themes and ideas from earlier movies it ends up as the weakest of the trilogy, which is a real shame.

I’ve got so much love for these characters and movies that I feel bad about being negative in any way. However, I can’t help feeling that Face the Music teeters on the edge of ‘maybe they should have just left alone with the last movie’ a little too often. At the end of the day though, I can't really knock a movie that's essentially all about harmless fun and, more importantly, carries with it a message about uniting the world, being excellent to each other. I think we all could appreciate that philosophy in our lives right now.
  
Midsommar (2019)
Midsommar (2019)
2019 | Drama, Horror, Mystery
In 2017 the stale market of “horror” thrillers got a royal shake-up when Jordan Peele made Get Out. All of a sudden it seemed possible again to use the tired genre, that had been relying on gore and jump shocks alone for at least two decades, as a palette for intelligent social commentary and some seriously artistic flourishes. The following year, Ari Aster came out of nowhere with a debut feature that impressed everyone for it’s originality and bravado in this new “art-horror” model – the devisive yet always interesting Hereditary, a film that confused me on first watch, but gave me faith that I could be unnerved again, it’s secret being that you couldn’t compare it to anything since the golden days of the 70s.

So, when I saw the trailer for Midsommar in 2019 and realised it was the same director, it went straight to the top of my must see list. Add to the appeal the significant lure of the lead actress and main character, the extremely promising Florence Pugh, who blew me away for her raw ability in Lady Macbeth, and beguiled me even more in every minute of Chan-Wook Park’s superlative espionage mini-series The Little Drummer Girl, and I knew this was something I didn’t want to miss. Sometimes it only takes two projects on a CV to elevate a future star from obscurity to A-list potential. In Pugh I had already seen enough range, charisma and depth to suspect she was one of those special few. By the end of Midsommar I was convinced of it!

Plot wise, all you need to know going in cold is that Dani (Pugh) racked with grief following early scenes is dragged to Sweden to participate in the Midsommar celebrations of a small isolated community, as her relationship with boyfriend Christian is very much on the rocks and she is in need of some catharsis and release. At first the Idyllic setting, bathed in sunlight you can almost feel, seems refreshing and clean. The whites, yellows and blues of the images are so crisp you can imagine every smell and texture, and you find yourself smiling, despite the fact a creeping unease and sinister secret is already infiltrating the calm in wonderfully subtle ways.

Needless to say it goes to some very dark and strange places. So much so I gasped out loud twice and stood up from my seat involuntarily on one particularly disturbing moment. To try and explain how that unfolds and comes to be is both impossible and would need some big time spoilers, so I won’t do that. It’s enough to say that where you are emotionally at the end of this filmic experience is very, very far from where you started. Much in the same way as Hereditary, you feel you have been dragged by the hair on a very uncomfortable journey that is both strangely unsatisfying, confusing and upsetting; you can’t say you “liked” either film as much as admitting you can’t stop thinking about them and need to see them again to absorb the detail, if indeed you can bear that.

As of writing this I haven’t gone back and watched this again – I’m genuinely wary of putting myself through it a second time! But, I have gone back to Hereditary and appreciated it much more knowing the ending already, and seeing the detail that is there from the beginning, that makes it all make sense in a way it doesn’t first time around. Midsommar, I sense, is the same, in that there has been so much attention to the build up and background that you will see and hear relevant clues to the mystery much more the more times you watch it. What they are wearing, images on walls and seemingly insignificant things the camera picks up on create a tapestry of loose threads that can be woven together into deeper meaning if that is what you want to do.

Without doing that it may seem like a bewildering entity, deliberately odd for the sake of it, and as such it could put anyone off. At 2 hours and 28 minutes it is a bit of a stretch, and the last half hour, once it descends into the complete madness suggested earlier, perhaps doesn’t live up to the promises it makes. Also, despite Pugh being a mesmeric presence from start to finish, the supporting cast can’t quite go with her on the same level. Even the talented Will Poulter seems burdened by a less than three dimensional character, underwritten as are many in a script that focuses so much on Dani that everything else suffers.

My overall impression of it as a film is that it falls short of greatness by a narrow margin, but comes very close at times to genuine genius. It is the promise of Aster as a filmmaker that excites me most, even if this is not the film it could have been with a little more experience, maturity and, perhaps, budget. It is his Bottle Rocket, or Hard Eight, when you suspect he will have a Grand Budapest Hotel, or a There Will Be Blood in him at some point down the line.

In conclusion, I can’t emphasise enough how much I was drawn to every moment of what Florence Pugh was doing. Be wary of the film if a casual viewing experience is what you want, because it may infuriate you, and compel you even to switch it off, if you are not totally ready to meet it where it wants to take you. But, watch it for Pugh and see what a rare talent she is bringing to cinema into the 2020s. A very exciting prospect indeed.
  
Artemis Fowl (2020)
Artemis Fowl (2020)
2020 | Action, Adventure, Family, Fantasy
Some setpieces (0 more)
Character development (1 more)
Forgettable story
Another Live-Action Disney Adaption Bomb
Contains spoilers, click to show
What is it about fantasy novels that makes them so difficult to translate effectively to the silver screen? It’s not impossible – J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series and Peter Jackson’s The Lord of the Rings adaptations are proof that it can be done. More often than not, however, the result is as limp and truncated as Kenneth Branagh’s Artemis Fowl – a few standout moments set adrift in a sea of underdeveloped characters, incomplete backstory elements, and abbreviated world building. Although the problem lies primarily in the difficulties associated with condensing an epic tale into a short-ish movie, the lack of elegance with which that is accomplished makes Artemis Fowl a failure for anyone hoping for the next great fantasy film.

The treatment accorded to Artemis Fowl (the movie condenses elements from the first two volumes of an eight-novel cycle into a single film) recalls a Disney misfire from more than three decades ago. Although The Black Cauldron was animated, it suffered from many of the same problems evident in Artemis Fowl: an oversimplification of the backstory, a rushed narrative with poorly realized characters, and a overall lack of faithfulness to the source material. The Black Cauldron worked better because it at least had a clean ending. Artemis Fowl suffers by trying to both provide a credible stopping point (in case there are no additional films) and offering a lead-in to additional adventures (in case there are additional films).

In the books, 12-year old Artemis (played by Ferdia Shaw, the grandson of Robert Shaw) is presented as an anti-hero (although, over the course of the saga, his villainous attributes fade to be replaced by heroic ones). Here, he’s more of a misunderstood boy-genius whose role as the protagonist is never in question. All of his edges have been smoothed out. The story focuses on Artemis’ efforts to locate and rescue his father, Artemis Fowl Sr. (Colin Farrell), an infamous art thief who has been kidnapped by the twisted evil fairy Opal Koboi. Her ransom for releasing him is that Artemis must locate and obtain a powerful McGuffin. He is joined in his efforts by Lower Elements Police (LEP) fairy police officer Holly Short (Lara McDonnell), giant dwarf Mulch Diggums (Josh Gad), and strongman Domovoi Butler (Nonso Anozie).

Artemis Fowl diverges considerably from the two books that form its basis, Artemis Fowl and Artemis Fowl and the Arctic Incident. Although author Eoin Colfer reportedly “approved” the changes, they push the film into an alternate universe from the one occupied by the novels. Even with the pruning of subplots and condensation of the narrative, 100 minutes is too short to tell the story effectively. None of the characters are well-developed, including Artemis. The boy’s relationship with Holly Short evolves with whiplash-inducing rapidity – one moment, they’re enemies (actually, she’s his prisoner), the next they’re friends. The film’s frenetic pace might work for ADD viewers and preteens but there’s no time for world-building or anything more than the most basic exposition. As a result, Artemis Fowl feels rushed to the point of being exhausting and strangely confusing despite the relatively straightforward storyline.

Kenneth Branagh was undoubtedly selected to direct the film based on his success with two earlier Disney properties: the live-action Cinderella and Marvel’s Thor. Perhaps because Branagh had no input into the screenplay (which was completed before he came on board), the movie lacks the complex psychological qualities he normally brings to his films. Visually, Artemis Fowl is impressive. However, although the fairy world of Haven is beautifully rendered, it appears all-too-briefly. The film’s most impressive sequence, a throwdown with a seemingly invincible troll, is a standout by any definition, but it represents only about five minutes of screen time and there’s nothing else that comes close – not even the muted climax.

As is often the case, Branagh’s presence at the top results in some impressive names in the cast. The young leads are newcomers – this is Ferdia Shaw’s first movie (and it shows – his performance is occasionally wooden) and Lara McDonnell’s third (she’s better, evidencing an indomitable pluckiness) – but the rest of the cast is populated with veterans. Josh Gad, another Disney regular, has the most openly comedic role of the film as Mulch Diggums. Colin Farrell is called on for limited duty as Artemis’ mostly-absent father. Nonso Anozie, who has a history with Branagh, plays Artemis’ protector and advisor. Finally, Judi Dench adds a dose of class as Holly’s no-nonsense boss.

It has taken Artemis Fowl nearly 20 years to traverse the route from page to screen and one senses that neither fans nor newcomers will be especially pleased with the end result. Recognizing that the film faced rough seas, Disney postponed the movie’s originally planned August 2019 release to May 2020 then, when the coronavirus made that impossible, the studio elected to shift the film to its Disney+ platform. Although partially a face-saving gesture (Artemis Fowl would likely have had a similar box office reception to Disney’s underwhelming 2018 release, The Nutcracker and the Four Realms), it at least allows the film to find a large audience in a low-pressure situation.

The bottom line seems to be that, while Disney has shown an aptitude for making many different kinds of movies, fantasy epics aren’t among them. This is one genre the Magic Kingdom should perhaps avoid, leaving such properties to studios that have shown better success (such as Warner Brothers). Artemis Fowl could have been the beginning of a movie franchise but, based on the first installment, it’s more likely a one-and-done outing. Disney can't quite get away from the John Carters can they?


THIS FILM IS AN EXCEPTIONAL BOMB
  
The Shape of Water  (2017)
The Shape of Water (2017)
2017 | Drama, Fantasy
A mystical tale of fish and fingers.
With perfect timing after scooping 13 Oscar nominations, “The Shape of Water” arrives for preview screenings in the UK. Is it worth all the hype?

Well, in a word, yes.

Not since Spielberg entranced the world in 1982 with a love story between an isolated and lonely child and an alien, stranded a million light-years from home, have we seen a magical fairy-tale so well told.

Cleaning up at the (box) office. Sally Hawkins and Doug Jones as the creature.
Here Lewisham’s own Sally Hawkins (“Paddington”, “Godzilla“) plays Elisa Esposito, an attractive but mousy mute living above a cinema and next door to her best friend: a struggling artist called Giles (Richard Jenkins). Sexually-frustrated, Elisa works out those tensions in the bath every morning before heading off to work as a cleaner at a government research institute. Together with partner Zelda Fuller (Octavia Spencer, “Hidden Figures“) she is asked to clean a highly secured room where a mysterious aquatic creature is being studied by the cruel and militaristic Strickland (Michael Shannon, “Midnight Special“, “Nocturnal Animals“) and the more compassionate scientist Hoffstetler. (The latter is played by Michael Stuhlbarg (“Miss Sloane“, “Steve Jobs“) in a performance that wasn’t recognised by the Academy, but for me really held the film’s story together). Elisa forms a relationship with the creature, and as the scientific investigations turn darker, she becomes determined to help him.

When you think about it, the similarities in the screenplay with E.T. are quite striking. But this is most definitely not a kid’s film, containing full frontal nudity, sex and some considerable violence, some of it “hands-over-the-eyes” worthy. Most of this violence comes courtesy of Shannon’s character, who is truly monstrous. He is uncontrollably vicious, single-minded and amoral: a hand over the mouth to silence his wife during vigourous sex cleverly belies where his true lust currently lies. (Shannon is just so convincing in all of his roles that, after “Nocturnal Animals“, it is a bit of a surprise to see that he is still alive and well!)
It’s worth pointing out for balance at this point that my wife thought this portrayal was over-egged for its villany, and she rated the film less highly than I did because of it.

Michael Shannon as evil incarnate.
So its no Oscar nomination this time for Shannon as a supporting actor. But that honour goes to Richard Jenkins, who is spectacularly good as the movie-musical-loving and pie-munching neighbour who is drawn unwillingly into Elisa’s plans. Giles is a richly fashioned character – also the film’s narrator – who struggles to fit in with the cruel and rascist 1962 world that he finds himself in. “Sometimes I think I was born too early or too late for my life” he bemoans to the creature whose loneliness he relates to. A scene in a cafe where he fastidiously wipes all traces of pie-filling from his tongue is masterfully done.

Richard Hawkins and Sally Hawkins, hatching a plan.
Octavia Spencer is also Oscar nominated for Best Supporting Actress, and it’s a magical partnership she shares with Hawkins, with each bouncing off each other wonderfully.

This leads to a ‘no brainer’ Oscar nomination for Sally Hawkins who delivers a star turn. She has to go through such a huge range of emotions in this film, and she genuinely makes you really care about the outcome like few films this year. It’s a little tricky since I haven’t seen “I Tonya” or “Ladybird” yet, but I would have thought that Ms Hawkins is going to possibly give Frances McDormand the closest run for her money on March 4th. My money would still be on McDormand for “3 Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri“, but the Oscar voters are bound to love “The Shape of Water”. For like “La La Land” last year, the film is (rather surprisingly for me) another love letter to Hollywood’s golden years, with Elisa and Giles living out their lives with classic movie music and dance numbers: a medium that Elisa only ever truly finds here “voice” through.

Eliza and Zelda about to give two fingers to the establishment.
In the technical categories the Oscar nominations were for Cinematography (Dan Laustsen); Film Editing (Sidney Wolinsky); Sound Editing (Nathan Robitaille and Nelson Ferreira); Sound Mixing (Glen Gauthier, Christian Cooke and Brad Zoern); Production Design (Paul D. Austerberry, Jeffrey A. Melvin and Shane Vieau); Original Score (Alexandre Desplat) and Costume Design (Luis Sequeira). And you really wouldn’t want to bet against any of these not to win, for the film is a technical delight. Right from the dreamlike opening titles (arguably, they missed a deserved nomination here for Visual Effects), the film is gorgeous to look at, with such brilliant detail in the production design that there is interesting stuff to look at in every frame. And the film editing is extraordinary: Elisa wobbles on the bucket she’s standing on, but it’s Strickland’s butt, perched on a table, that slips off. This is a film that deserves multiple repeat viewings.

The monster feeding the monster. Nick Searcy as General Hoyt with Strickland (Michael Shannon).
An the helm is the multi-talented Guillermo del Toro (“Pacific Rim”, “Crimson Peak”) who both directed and co-wrote the exceptionally smart screenplay (with Vanessa Taylor, “Divergent”) and is nominated for both. I actually found the story to be rather predictable, as regards Elisa’s story arc, but that in no way reduced my enjoyment of the film. For the “original screenplay” is nothing if not “original”…. it’s witty, intelligent and shocking at different turns.

The violence and sex won’t be for everyone… but this is a deep and rich movie experience that everyone who loves the movies should at least appreciate… hopefully in a dry cinema!
  
American Heist (2015)
American Heist (2015)
2015 | Action, Drama
7
7.0 (1 Ratings)
Movie Rating
Story: American Heist starts with James (Christensen) waiting before starting to look for someone then an explosion surprises him bring us back a day in time where we follow James going about his everyday life. James has a brother Frankie (Brody) fresh out of prison being picked up by his criminal connection Sugar (Akon) who keeps him happy with drinks, drugs and girls on his first night out before meeting the boss Ray (Kittles).

James has turned his life around where he now works on the straight life working as a mechanic, he sees an old flame Emily (Brewster) back in town where James sees his life moving in the right direction. Frankie turns up to see his brother’s life after ten years locked away. Frankie arranges to meet for drinks with James which leads to him discussion a new job opportunity which leads us back to the opening scene where James gets tricked into a job as Frankie is trying to repay his debts.

Ray has assembled a team to pull off an elaborate bank robbery which will finally see Frankie pay back the debts he owes because James has the skills to get part of the plan done.

American Heist is a story that does seem to follow the traditional idea of a recently released from prison criminal goes straight back into the criminal world even if it isn’t fully his desire. We also see how the man thinking he has escaped from the criminal world gets dragged back in for one more job. This side of the story has been done before but is does really push the two brothers on an emotional level. When it comes to the actual heist it does become the secondary story behind the brothers relationship with the preparation being a quick flash scene and like most heist films go completely wrong. The story will have to go down as a solid entry into the genre but won’t be a film climbing into anyone’s best. (7/10)

 

Actor Review

 

Hayden Christensen: James is the former criminal who has turned his life around with a clean cut job where he is trying to get his own business, his life may not be perfect but he is happy that everything is all legal now. When his brothers released from prison he ends up caught up trying to pay off Frankie’s debts forced into working for criminal Ray. Hayden continues to try and recover from the criticism he got for Star Wars with another anti pretty boy film where he tries to play tough but doesn’t quite pull it off. (6/10)

james

Adrien Brody: Frankie is James’ brother who fresh out of prisoner does straight back into his criminal underworld where criminal boss Ray wants both Frankie and James to work for him. Frankie went through a lot in prison and always stood up for his brothers, as well as helping him become the man he is now. Adrien gives a performance you would expect from an Oscar winner, he does show his skills but sometimes feels like he is overacting to the situations. (7/10)

 frankie

Jordana Brewster: Emily is the old flame who comes back into James’ life. Emily just so happens to be a dispatch caller for the police which could make the bank job all that much harder as Emily and James start rekindling their romance. Jordana does a good job but really doesn’t get enough screen time for the romantic angle in the story. (6/10)

 

Akon: Sugar is the second in command to Ray who gets the dirty jobs done when other people won’t get involved. Akon does make a good supporting actor never trying to over act like many musicians do when they enter the acting world. (7/10)

 

Tory Kittles: Ray is the criminal who helped Frankie in prison leaving him being owed a favour from Frankie when he finally gets out. Ray makes Frankie bring James back into the criminal world to take part in an elaborate heist. Tory makes for a good emotionless tough criminal who believes in every word he is saying. (7/10)

 

Support Cast: American Heist doesn’t really have many more characters involved in the story, we have the generic characters trying to chase down the criminals and the members of the group trying to pull off the heist.

 

Director Review: Sarik Andreasyan – Sarik gives us a solid heist film that really does focus on the relationship between the two brothers who have gone down different paths but must work together one last time. (7/10)

 

Action: American Heist keeps the action in a realistic level apart from one moment, making each feel like it could be a real heist and aftermath. (7/10)

Drama: American Heist creates a dysfunctional relationship between the two brothers which helps show just how far they would go for each other. (7/10)

Settings: American Heist keeps the settings in location where you would imagine the characters would want to turn to crime to end all the suffering they are going through. (8/10)

Suggestion: American Heist is one to try, I do think if you are a fan of the genre you will enjoy but there is only so much you can do with a heist film without fully copying anything else. (Try It)

 

Best Part: I really liked how the film ended, but can’t give it away.

Worst Part: How James gets pulled into the criminal world again.

Action Scene Of The Film: Ray’s escape attempt.

 

Believability: The heist feels like it could be how a real one would end, but the relationship side mixed with the heist not so. (4/10)

Chances of Tears: No (0/10)

Chances of Sequel: No

Post Credits Scene: No

Similar Too: Kill Point (TV Show)

 

Oscar Chances: None

Budget: $10 Million

Runtime: 1 Hour 34 Minutes

 

Overall: American Heist will go down as an emotionally gritty heist film about two brothers.

https://moviesreview101.com/2015/05/26/american-heist-2015/